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(The Consumerist)   I didn't read the terms and conditions of the Delta SkyMiles program and they kicked me out. Can you help me get their CEO sent to Guantanamo Bay?   (consumerist.com) divider line 120
    More: Dumbass, Guantanamo Bay, SkyMiles, frequent flyer programs, plain meaning  
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14546 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Nov 2012 at 8:54 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-13 10:18:05 PM

crypticsatellite: I once saw YoYo Ma do the same thing. I wonder if they'll go after him next...


What'd you say about my yo ma?
 
2012-11-13 10:18:13 PM
So there are a few things here:

1 - The Cello player didn't even contact Consumerist, they went and fished it off his blog (I'm guessing after they saw it on MSNBC). So for once, someone is not whinging to Consumerist

2 - The TOS clearly states that musical instruments can't qualify for the miles perks

3 - He was told about this, nodded and expected them to remove the cellos' miles

4 - Delta did not remove the miles and he wasn't entirely forthcoming in letting them know, but he didn't change his travel habits eitherf

5 - I think Delta was overly harsh in their reaction once they realized THEIR mistake and that's unfortunate

6 - i would like to live in la la land that they will lose a lot of business over this, but, well, I sadly don't think they will.

/Grumble Mumble Sigh about Airlines
//They have too much power, not enough accountability
///SLASHIES COME IN THREE
 
2012-11-13 10:20:05 PM

Gyrfalcon: Sorry, anyone who writes in to Consumerist with a problem automatically deserves to be beaten with a sack of doorknobs, no matter how valid their complaint.


See, I don't get this. The automatic FARK hate for Consumerist letters.

FARK thrives on pointing out stupidity in the news. Why auto-hate a website whose very existence is pointing out corporate stupidity?

Sure, laugh at the Super Special Snowflakes who occasionally write in with dumb complaints. But why hate the whole site?
 
2012-11-13 10:21:26 PM

divx88: So if you're fat, can you get banned for using Mr. Right Ass Cheek's miles?


Yes.

Because it's 1 person getting miles period apparently. If your right ass cheek can travel on its own, without you, you might be able to get miles for it.
 
2012-11-13 10:22:04 PM

scottydoesntknow: I was told there's always room for cello


www.gbfans.com

1.bp.blogspot.com

/See, it works on two levels 'cause he makes a jello joke in the second move and she was a cellist and uh... OK I'll shut up now...
 
2012-11-13 10:22:07 PM
Maybe Delta could return the miles at double. And then contribute the same count of miles in real dollars to orchestras in the cities they "serve." I'm sure it's all a tax write off with PR effect. And it would show up in program notes. Maybe even the official airline of the xxx orchestra.

Having to pay double for a necessary air trip (and keep a priceless instrument from being damaged or stolen) is enough for a world class musician to deal with without corporate officers sabotaging their company and passengers.
 
2012-11-13 10:25:44 PM
halB: 1) They were making money off of him.

2) It appears he would have continued to exclusively use them in the future.

3) This means their competitors are not making money, which is good for Delta.

4) I think this is a bad sign of capitalism's health when a company feels like they can piss all over the first 3 points.


On my last trip to Aruba, I bought a return ticket trip from delta, from delta's USA site, while sitting here in my condo in the USA. And they billed it as a foreign transaction (which my bank happily tacked another 3% onto). There was no indication on the site that it would be billed as a foreign transaction, is that standard? They don't do it with round trip tickets as far as I can see.

// If I had known they were going to do that, I would have used a different card.

// I didn't buy a round trip with delta because all of their outbound flights sucked at the time, 6+ hour layovers, all going through their hub.

// Hipmunk rocks
 
2012-11-13 10:26:59 PM

You know what this is? The world's smallest violin playing just for this guy.


img690.imageshack.us


BTW I bought a Delta child's ticket for the violin, and got no skymile for it.

 
2012-11-13 10:27:30 PM

MadAzza: I usually side with the airline if there's a complaint, because usually the customer is being unreasonable.

However, Delta is coming across as petty and vindictive here.


Very vindictive. They not only took away the miles accumulated for the cello but they took away the guy's accumulated miles as well.

As others have posted a full fare is a full fare be it for human or non-human and it is still money in Delta's pocket.

Dumbass tag is for Delta not the musician.
 
2012-11-13 10:29:22 PM

Musikslayer: Especially since the cellist is a mega-superstar in the classical world. Next to Yo-Yo, he's probably the #2 guy in America. On top of that he's really nice and cordial, he's like the Tom Hanks of Cello. This story happened a while ago and every cellist knows about it. It's not like a cello boycott will do a lot of damage, but at least Delta will lose 2 sales for every cellist that chooses another airline. Screwing with Lynn Harrell is like picking on Mr. Rogers.


I used to play cello, so I'm embarrassed that I'd not heard of him.

So I looked him up, and... tuning his cello on the fly? (See 6:42 and 6:47 -- you can hear it the second time too.) Fun :-)
 
2012-11-13 10:30:20 PM
i gotta side with the guy just because they've allowed it for 11 years. to suddenly change their minds, take all his miles, close his account, and forbid him from getting a new account is just corporate asshattery at it's worst.
 
2012-11-13 10:33:43 PM

oryx: If a corporation can be a person, why not a cello?


Yes, a corporation is not a person, therefore the government should be able to control them however it desires without restraint. It's not like people run them or invest in them.

And also, a marriage is not a person, therefore the government should be able to dissolve your marriage if it feels like it.

And a will is just a piece of paper attributed to a corpse, therefore the government should be able to seize people's property when they die.

Do you see what tyranny is possible when you say, "I can't point to a single living human embodiment of this corporation/marriage/will, etc., therefore the government can do whatever it wants with it"? Might as well say that a government is not a person, therefore I'm free to pretend it doesn't exist.
 
2012-11-13 10:34:51 PM
Because subtard reads the T&C for EVERYTHING.

Go fark yourself with a rusty rake, subtard.
 
2012-11-13 10:35:35 PM

Endive Wombat: What am I missing here?


Its a Fark meme: if its on the Consumerist, it must be idiotic. "Corporations are good for us....Reagonomics are the key to our dominance....trickle-down theory wooooooorks." [all said in that Future Guy's voice]
 
2012-11-13 10:35:55 PM

Birnone: My Solomon-like decision would be:

Each seat he pays for can earn frequent flyer perks, but separately. So if he flies 2,000 miles buying two tickets, each ticket has 2,000 miles of perks earned. He can't add them together to get 4,000 miles of perks on one account.


That's what he was doing already.
 
2012-11-13 10:36:57 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Endive Wombat: Wait...based off the way I am reading this, Delta is the asshat here, not the OP.

I presume he is paying full price for the second seat that is occupied by the instrument. So, if that is the case, who the fark cares if it is a living, breathing human, dog, pet rock, imaginary friend or musical instrument.

Money is being spent for a second seat and that is that.

What am I missing here?

I recently paid full price for a non-refundable ticket from LAX to Tokyo that I had to forfeit because my travel plans suddenly changed. The miles from that leg of my trip would not be granted because I was not physically present on the flight, even though for all intents and purposes I had 1. already paid for the ticket and 2. saved the plane money by not taking a seat on board.

In this case too, the guy may not feel like it, but by buying a seat for his cello (something that can't accrue miles on its own) he isn't also buying the rights to the flight miles.

It doesn't feel right, but them's the breaks.


What could make u miss a paid trip to Tokyo? Also, fly American, my executive platinum with around 175k a year for ten years treats me (and those with the same last name) as kings.
 
2012-11-13 10:39:32 PM

whatsupchuck: The airline is getting a regular paying customer (the cello) that doesn't eat free peanuts, drink free soda, clog up the flying toilets, cry, get drunk or insult the flight attendants. You'd think they'd want as many musical instruments on board as they could possibly manage.


Not to mention the fuel saved but maybe they didn't calculate that and are pissed because of the extra fuel they added that didn't get burned and could use for the next flight.

Something along those lines anyway.
 
2012-11-13 10:40:02 PM
Multi-million dollar instrument? That must be street value.
 
2012-11-13 10:42:43 PM
"We reminded you about this 11 years ago and so now we're just going to completely cut you off and take away all your miles"

Dick move by Delta. Not that hard for them to just give him miles for one of the seats he buys when he books two at a time.

Or, heaven forbid, they could embrace a high profile customer and his odd companion and use it for some form of self-promotion.
 
2012-11-13 10:43:30 PM

Endive Wombat: Wait...based off the way I am reading this, Delta is the asshat here, not the OP.

I presume he is paying full price for the second seat that is occupied by the instrument. So, if that is the case, who the fark cares if it is a living, breathing human, dog, pet rock, imaginary friend or musical instrument.

Money is being spent for a second seat and that is that.

What am I missing here?


It bumps a human that might get that seat. If the plane wasn't full, then Delta was the asshat.
 
2012-11-13 10:43:43 PM

zzrhardy: Douchebage airline vs Consumerist poster.

It's like watching the 2 people you hare most slug it out.


Lynn Harrell is not a "Consumerist poster". His blog post was re-posted by someone else.

Gyrfalcon: Sorry, anyone who writes in to Consumerist with a problem automatically deserves to be beaten with a sack of doorknobs, no matter how valid their complaint.


Sorry, anyone who comments without RTFA automatically deserves to be beaten with a sack of doorknobs, no matter how many five-dollar bills they've thrown at Drew's feet.
 
2012-11-13 10:44:37 PM

Endive Wombat: Wait...based off the way I am reading this, Delta is the asshat here, not the OP.

I presume he is paying full price for the second seat that is occupied by the instrument. So, if that is the case, who the fark cares if it is a living, breathing human, dog, pet rock, imaginary friend or musical instrument.

Money is being spent for a second seat and that is that.

What am I missing here?


What ever it is I am missing it too.
He bought two tickets, he got the frequent customer rewards for two tickets.
Now Delta has basically turned away a paying customer whom even with frequent flyer miles for both seats is very profitable for them to have.

I guess this is what happens when a business is heavily subsidized with funds the government takes from people. Then there is the power tripping with all the post-911-world nonsense that it seems some airline employees enjoy.

There should be a business equation: Profits with miles for the cello and the cello player vs. profits without a cello player and his cello. The first has to be more profitable than two separate people or two empty seats.
 
2012-11-13 10:46:22 PM

whatsupchuck: The airline is getting a regular paying customer (the cello) that doesn't eat free peanuts, drink free soda, clog up the flying toilets, cry, get drunk or insult the flight attendants. You'd think they'd want as many musical instruments on board as they could possibly manage.


idiotflashback.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-11-13 10:46:56 PM

DanTheMan1024: AverageAmericanGuy: Endive Wombat: Wait...based off the way I am reading this, Delta is the asshat here, not the OP.

I presume he is paying full price for the second seat that is occupied by the instrument. So, if that is the case, who the fark cares if it is a living, breathing human, dog, pet rock, imaginary friend or musical instrument.

Money is being spent for a second seat and that is that.

What am I missing here?

I recently paid full price for a non-refundable ticket from LAX to Tokyo that I had to forfeit because my travel plans suddenly changed. The miles from that leg of my trip would not be granted because I was not physically present on the flight, even though for all intents and purposes I had 1. already paid for the ticket and 2. saved the plane money by not taking a seat on board.

In this case too, the guy may not feel like it, but by buying a seat for his cello (something that can't accrue miles on its own) he isn't also buying the rights to the flight miles.

It doesn't feel right, but them's the breaks.

What could make u miss a paid trip to Tokyo? Also, fly American, my executive platinum with around 175k a year for ten years treats me (and those with the same last name) as kings.


It was my return flight to Tokyo. My presence was required in LA for another week.

But hey, I got to visit Stone Brewery, finally.
 
2012-11-13 10:47:50 PM

RedVentrue: It bumps a human that might get that seat.


So what? It's not a humanitarian aid flight, lifting people out of Syria.
Whoever pays for a seat gets it first, whether its for a dog, cello or their left ass cheek.
 
2012-11-13 10:49:19 PM

RedVentrue: It bumps a human that might get that seat. If the plane wasn't full, then Delta was the asshat.


The ticket was paid for, and with an instrument like that, bumping the cello is as bad as bumping the cellist.
 
2012-11-13 10:53:18 PM

Endive Wombat: Wait...based off the way I am reading this, Delta is the asshat here, not the OP.

I presume he is paying full price for the second seat that is occupied by the instrument. So, if that is the case, who the fark cares if it is a living, breathing human, dog, pet rock, imaginary friend or musical instrument.

Money is being spent for a second seat and that is that.

What am I missing here?


nothing. Airline assholes.
 
2012-11-13 10:54:47 PM

RedVentrue: It bumps a human that might get that seat. If the plane wasn't full, then Delta was the asshat.


Why should that matter? They got paid for the seat.
 
2012-11-13 10:56:10 PM

Your Average Witty Fark User: Because subtard reads the T&C for EVERYTHING.

Go fark yourself with a rusty rake, subtard.


he was notified a while ago that he wasn't allowed to do this.
he ignored that.

you may not read the T&C, but you could at least read TFA.
 
2012-11-13 11:05:19 PM

Musikslayer: gingerjet:

/completely farked up PR move by Delta


Especially since the cellist is a mega-superstar in the classical world. Next to Yo-Yo, he's probably the #2 guy in America. On top of that he's really nice and cordial, he's like the Tom Hanks of Cello. This story happened a while ago and every cellist knows about it. It's not like a cello boycott will do a lot of damage, but at least Delta will lose 2 sales for every cellist that chooses another airline. Screwing with Lynn Harrell is like picking on Mr. Rogers.


This I did not know.

/they dun goofed
 
2012-11-13 11:12:12 PM
so wait, did the cellist contact Delta's customer service department to try to resolve the situation or did he run straight to the Internet for "help"?
 
2012-11-13 11:19:37 PM
DanTheMan1024:
...fly American, my executive platinum with around 175k a year for ten years treats me (and those with the same last name) as kings.

So much this. If any competing airlines were smart, they'd get their PR department to set this guy up on THEIR airline, and restore his lost FF miles in their system. The bad PR alone for Delta would be worth at least a good number of people skipping Delta the next time they plan a trip...

/Oh, what the hell am I talking about.... All the airlines are in collusion with each other anyhow, so it don't make a hill beans worth of difference... 
 
2012-11-13 11:23:41 PM
What I hate is that someone (not me, but I've seen it happen) will buy two seats - maybe they need a little extra room or maybe they just don't want anyone immediately beside them or whatever - and the flight attendants will seat someone in the bought and paid for empty seat anyway. I genuinely sympathize with the customer there, it was their extra seat to sit in or not as they pleased and you know they're not going to get a refund for someone else sitting in their seat.
 
2012-11-13 11:26:39 PM
I got it.

Delta did this because of the boarding sequence they call:

Medallion Gold
Silver Awards
Premium
Bonus Points Elite
Ultra Gold
People with wooden legs
Section Eight Privilege
Elvis Impersonators
Handicapped needing new batteries
Cellists

If Mr Cello had earned enough points to get Medallion status it would also create fits in the Sky Lounge because it would likely have a greater biometric footprint than most of the travelers there.

I've flown Delta 4x's this year, 2 domestic and 2 international to Russia and I think they deserve an award for how complicated they can make a routine boarding.

On most foreign airlines its "OK here's the plane, get on, sit down, shut up" and voila away we go.

Really, stop it.

And then there's the inane video of jolly old CEO saying how thrilled he is to sit at the founders desk.

I can see Richard Crandall doing somersaults someplace in the Black Sea
 
2012-11-13 11:27:41 PM

saturn badger: RedVentrue: It bumps a human that might get that seat. If the plane wasn't full, then Delta was the asshat.

Why should that matter? They got paid for the seat.


My dad booked a quartet for a concert, cellist had a ticket, the plane was full, so they bumped the cello. After figuring out that there was no other way to get there on time (it was an international flight), he ended up checking it in baggage. You can guess the rest. Luckily, a local cellist had a nice instrument he could borrow, but it was a million dollar cello.

If I was on a flight, and it was me or somebody's cello, I'd get the hell off the flight. I can survive waiting a few hours.
 
2012-11-13 11:29:08 PM

Anschauer: I got it.

Delta did this because of the boarding sequence they call:

Medallion Gold
Silver Awards
Premium
Bonus Points Elite
Ultra Gold
People with wooden legs
Section Eight Privilege
Elvis Impersonators
Handicapped needing new batteries
Cellists

If Mr Cello had earned enough points to get Medallion status it would also create fits in the Sky Lounge because it would likely have a greater biometric footprint than most of the travelers there.

I've flown Delta 4x's this year, 2 domestic and 2 international to Russia and I think they deserve an award for how complicated they can make a routine boarding.

On most foreign airlines its "OK here's the plane, get on, sit down, shut up" and voila away we go.

Really, stop it.

And then there's the inane video of jolly old CEO saying how thrilled he is to sit at the founders desk.

I can see Richard Crandall doing somersaults someplace in the Black Sea


I am a Medallion Platinum member, so I'm really getting a kick out of this reply.
 
2012-11-13 11:29:46 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: Your Average Witty Fark User: Because subtard reads the T&C for EVERYTHING.

Go fark yourself with a rusty rake, subtard.

he was notified a while ago that he wasn't allowed to do this.
he ignored that.

you may not read the T&C, but you could at least read TFA.


Butthurt much, subtard?

I did RTFA. GFY.
 
2012-11-13 11:33:37 PM

Your Average Witty Fark User: tenpoundsofcheese: Your Average Witty Fark User: Because subtard reads the T&C for EVERYTHING.

Go fark yourself with a rusty rake, subtard.

he was notified a while ago that he wasn't allowed to do this.
he ignored that.

you may not read the T&C, but you could at least read TFA.

I did RTFA. GFY.


Got it.
you read it.
you just didn't understand it.

I forgive you!
 
2012-11-13 11:34:01 PM
Wait...there are people who DON'T think the CEO of Delta should be sent to Gitmo?

/CEO of United should be put UNDER Gitmo.
/United would have shipped the Cello to Gitmo. After breaking it.
 
2012-11-13 11:36:56 PM
But why is it pronounced : chel-oh and not sell-oh?

I thought it was if a" c" is followed by an "e" it sounds like an "s", like nice.

The English language is a frankensteen language of languages. No wonder people can't learn it.
 
2012-11-13 11:39:04 PM
Every paid seat on the Airline should earn frequent flyer miles for whoever paid for the seat, regardless of how many seats were purchased or whether or not there is even a human in the seat.
 
2012-11-13 11:40:15 PM

scottydoesntknow: I was told there's always room for cello


leithomalley.files.wordpress.com

There is.
 
2012-11-13 11:40:51 PM
I'd rather sit next to a cello than a fat biatch.
 
2012-11-13 11:42:48 PM

7FARK7: Every paid seat on the Airline should earn frequent flyer miles for whoever paid for the seat, regardless of how many seats were purchased or whether or not there is even a human in the seat.


So if you buy tickets for your family, or if a company reimburses the travel they should get all the points?

You can do that, but then you would need to adjust the program (e.g. when you hit bonus levels, award tiers, etc)
 
2012-11-13 11:43:38 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: Your Average Witty Fark User: tenpoundsofcheese: Your Average Witty Fark User: Because subtard reads the T&C for EVERYTHING.

Go fark yourself with a rusty rake, subtard.

he was notified a while ago that he wasn't allowed to do this.
he ignored that.

you may not read the T&C, but you could at least read TFA.

I did RTFA. GFY.

Got it.
you read it.
you just didn't understand it.

I forgive you!


TROLL! Trying to turn this into a fundamentalist christian thread.
 
2012-11-13 11:47:56 PM
I've been bumped by a million miler cello before, so I'm getting a kick...
 
2012-11-13 11:59:07 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: 7FARK7: Every paid seat on the Airline should earn frequent flyer miles for whoever paid for the seat, regardless of how many seats were purchased or whether or not there is even a human in the seat.

So if you buy tickets for your family, or if a company reimburses the travel they should get all the points?

You can do that, but then you would need to adjust the program (e.g. when you hit bonus levels, award tiers, etc)


This would then free up the points holder to then use the points to get seats for whoever, or whatever can fit it the seat..
 
2012-11-14 12:12:05 AM

LordOfThePings: Sucks to be banned for cello putting.


Well done.
 
2012-11-14 12:28:40 AM

The Jami Turman Fan Club: saturn badger: RedVentrue: It bumps a human that might get that seat. If the plane wasn't full, then Delta was the asshat.

Why should that matter? They got paid for the seat.

My dad booked a quartet for a concert, cellist had a ticket, the plane was full, so they bumped the cello. After figuring out that there was no other way to get there on time (it was an international flight), he ended up checking it in baggage. You can guess the rest. Luckily, a local cellist had a nice instrument he could borrow, but it was a million dollar cello.

If I was on a flight, and it was me or somebody's cello, I'd get the hell off the flight. I can survive waiting a few hours.


They lost his million dollar cello? I hope that was insured.
 
2012-11-14 12:30:31 AM

PaulieattheTap: But why is it pronounced : chel-oh and not sell-oh?

I thought it was if a" c" is followed by an "e" it sounds like an "s", like nice.

The English language is a frankensteen language of languages. No wonder people can't learn it.


Because "cello" is short for "violoncello", which isn't English. It's Italian.

Anschauer: On most foreign airlines its "OK here's the plane, get on, sit down, shut up" and voila away we go.

Really, stop it.

And then there's the inane video of jolly old CEO saying how thrilled he is to sit at the founders desk.


Delta's boarding process is pretty simply. Pre-boarders (elderly, etc.), First Class, Sky (which is all Medallion levels Gold or higher), and then the numbered zones. How hard is that?

And they changed the video last week. Now it's more lighthearted, with several slightly humorous moments. The annoying redhead with the Huuuuuuge mouth is gone, although she does make a cameo in the new video.
 
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