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(White House)   Petition to deport everyone that signed a petition to withdraw their state from The United States of America   (petitions.whitehouse.gov) divider line 343
    More: Followup, petitions  
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15262 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Nov 2012 at 9:36 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-13 10:01:29 AM  

theknuckler_33: This is silly.


farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2012-11-13 10:01:35 AM  

socratesthekidd: You know... it's just a strange damned thing and speaks to a much bigger issue.

I really didn't like bush, I even hung a flag upside down out of my dorm, because I was an overzealous college idiot with little understanding of things.

But even then, my thing was "we are in trouble, and need help." not "eff this i'm out"

as bad as i have ever thought it was, i never wanted out.


In the end, it's the money that politicians care about, the party affiliation is the road they travel to get there.

I see them like preachers on TV... they can pick baptist, methodist, whatever... the truth is, they just want the $$$. They don't agree with simple peons such as ourselves -- they could care less about us. Their political party is how they "connect" with us. But, in my experiences, it has been nothing but an easier way for them to use our predictable weaknesses against us. Republicans want less government, so the lying "republican" will promise less government. Will they provide? Hell no. Same goes for democrats, "we need national healthcare," they say. I'm still paying for my health insurance. In fact, now I'm required to ... WTF?!? I just can't believe that people still fall for these people that are none other than snakeoil salesmen with a twist -- that twist being that they not only try to sell you bs, but they try to connect to you on an extremely fake emotional level.

/Libertarians FTW.
 
2012-11-13 10:02:11 AM  
21 right wing wacko petitions and 1 sarcastic reactionary petition that will be cited as "proof" that "both sides do it".

That's about the right ratio.
 
2012-11-13 10:02:16 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: 1) Assuming that the signees were born and raised in the U.S., where are they to be deported?

2) Punishing them for signing a petition would be a violation of their First Amendment rights.


So? If those states succeed from the union, who is going to help fund my Section 8 housing, and food stamps? There won't be enough tax payers in the states that are left to help fund all this.

I see nothing wrong with getting rid of a few toothless knuckleheads in order for me to have the right of free housing and food.
 
2012-11-13 10:03:07 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: 1) Assuming that the signees were born and raised in the U.S., where are they to be deported?

2) Punishing them for signing a petition would be a violation of their First Amendment rights.


Alright, pack it up folks. You heard the man. No fun allowed. This is a strict no-fun zone.
 
2012-11-13 10:03:54 AM  

99.998er: Dear Red States:


Oh yay, is this where we get to hear a bunch of sanctimonious bullshiat about how NYC is the center of the universe and all Northerners are enlightened wonderful people and all people in the South are terrible and evil?

Sincerely,

Citizens of the Enlightened States of America


sigh

/this is bad
//you should feel bad
 
2012-11-13 10:04:10 AM  

Tumunga: Bathia_Mapes: 1) Assuming that the signees were born and raised in the U.S., where are they to be deported?

2) Punishing them for signing a petition would be a violation of their First Amendment rights.

So? If those states succeed from the union, who is going to help fund my Section 8 housing, and food stamps? There won't be enough tax payers in the states that are left to help fund all this.

I see nothing wrong with getting rid of a few toothless knuckleheads in order for me to have the right of free housing and food steal other people's property because i'm too lazy to work.


ftfy
 
2012-11-13 10:04:14 AM  
Put them on a raft and set them adrift in the berring sea
 
2012-11-13 10:04:16 AM  
It would seem that people who cannot properly choose when to should use the "who" and when to should use "that" also doesn't know anything about the constitution either. Pronouns are hard!
 
2012-11-13 10:04:24 AM  
Forward™

This president & Admin has brought this country together so much it hurts

*eyeroll*
 
2012-11-13 10:04:49 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: 2) Punishing them for signing a petition would be a violation of their First Amendment rights.


Yes, but according to Scalia, it isn't punishment if there is no "punitive intent." Clearly, the intent in deporting America's enemies isn't to punish them. It is to do them the favor of removing them from the situation that makes them so unhappy. In much the same way capitalists routinely do their vocally unhappy employees the "favor" of firing them in order to "help them find a line of work that makes them happy." Therefore, there is a purely beneficent intent here, and deportation here is constitutionally permissible.
 
2012-11-13 10:05:15 AM  

Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: You didn't honestly think the GOP worked for you, did you? You work for the rich guys. They don't give a shiat about you individually. In this country, useful idiots abound.


Yeah, that's what they told us in 1917, too.

It worked out just great.

Resentment of the rich is not a political platform, it's a tantrum.
 
2012-11-13 10:05:24 AM  

phrawgh: The very definition of traitor.


They have not made war upon the US, nor aided its enemies. Thus, what they've done doesn't fit the Constitutional definition of a traitor. It's very clear about that.
 
2012-11-13 10:05:27 AM  

JackieRabbit: It would seem that people who cannot properly choose when to should use the "who" and when to should use "that" also doesn't know anything about the constitution either. Pronouns are hard!


So are grammar
 
2012-11-13 10:06:03 AM  
Guys, we're missing out an HUGE opportunity here! Don't sign this stupid depot petition, go sign the original petition and help kick Louisiana out of the country!

This is our chance to get rid of those inbred twats forever! What are you waiting for? Sign it! Sign it now and help make the USA a better place!
 
2012-11-13 10:06:06 AM  

JackieRabbit: It would seem that people who cannot properly choose when to should use the "who" and when to should use "that" also doesn't know anything about the constitution either. Pronouns are hard!


no one proofreads on fark, this isn't a grammatical dick waving contest.
 
2012-11-13 10:06:08 AM  

Joe Blowme: Cant kick them all out, who will pay for all your programs?


DAMN YOU!!
 
2012-11-13 10:06:09 AM  
What you need is a petition to give up your United States and become provinces of Canada. You'd have universal health care, a dollar that's worth something, access to all the oil you'd need, room to expand, you'd be able to travel anywhere in the world without being shot at, and access to Tim Hortons and all the hockey games you ever wanted to attend. The only draw back is you have to tolerate Quebec.
 
2012-11-13 10:06:09 AM  
I live in the south. I'm ok with the idea of seceding. My one issue: I don't want Florida. Is the north willing to keep florida?
 
2012-11-13 10:06:14 AM  
I hear Somalia is lovely this time of year. No taxes, no regulation, no law - just you, your gun, and however much you can take.

/until someone takes it from you.
 
2012-11-13 10:06:26 AM  

xanadian: Well, that was one of the stupidest things I've ever seen...


You didn't see the Texas one, didja?

/signed this one
//all for deporting stupidity
///except for the good looking people
////and those that cook
 
2012-11-13 10:06:47 AM  
It'd be hilarious if the White House called Texas out on it and said "yep, go have a state wide vote on it". The politicking and rhetoric in Texas would easily surpass what was going on during the election.
 
2012-11-13 10:07:08 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: OK, how about everyone who signed a petition to withdraw their state from the USA gets a free copy of the Texas v. White (1869) decision with the words "Suck it, biatches!" written on it by Obama.


one subscription, please.
 
2012-11-13 10:07:13 AM  

indarwinsshadow: What you need is a petition to give up your United States and become provinces of Canada. You'd have universal health care, a dollar that's worth something, access to all the oil you'd need, room to expand, you'd be able to travel anywhere in the world without being shot at, and access to Tim Hortons and all the hockey games you ever wanted to attend. The only draw back is you have to tolerate Quebec.


FALSE. THERE IS NO HOCKEY.
 
2012-11-13 10:07:49 AM  

tuxq: JackieRabbit: It would seem that people who cannot properly choose when to should use the "who" and when to should use "that" also doesn't know anything about the constitution either. Pronouns are hard!

no one proofreads on fark, this isn't a grammatical dick waving contest.


Oh, wait, you weren't referring to me. See, in my previous post, I was guilty of doing it... and I caught it, but it was too late. My bad. Maybe it's contagious?
 
2012-11-13 10:08:22 AM  
So when was it that Conservatives became the whiny biatches that the liberals used to be? Conservatives were once logical, rational and firm in their patriotism, even in defeat. Now some of you want to secede because you lost an election (or several)? How weak and cowardly.
 
2012-11-13 10:08:38 AM  

Millennium: phrawgh: The very definition of traitor.

They have not made war upon the US, nor aided its enemies. Thus, what they've done doesn't fit the Constitutional definition of a traitor. It's very clear about that.


The prospect of an American civil war aids America's enemies, and gives them comfort by boosting their morale.
 
2012-11-13 10:09:07 AM  
To be fair, if we let those states secede the signers would 'self - deport'...
 
2012-11-13 10:09:42 AM  
Republicans live rural. Democrats live urban. Since you can't separate the cities and the farms into their own countries, we're going to have to keep working together whether we like it or not.
 
2012-11-13 10:09:58 AM  
Please deport me, and my entire family, to the Caymans, please.

I'll sign it twice, maybe even 3 times!
 
2012-11-13 10:10:25 AM  

bacongood: Would this include any idiot who put up one those "Bush isn't my president" signs?

Everyone needs to grow up; we picked from two different flavors of vanilla.


He and his team said we weren't American if we didn't agree with him. He told us that he wasn't our president. I haven't seen Obama say anything like that.
 
2012-11-13 10:10:25 AM  
The problem isn't that the US is that bad. It just is too big to administer the governance of the states very well. Secession is a pretty good solution - smaller, more manageable states with trade agreements and defense pacts is perfectly viable. It isn't a solution that will come to fruition.

When I say it is too big, it really isn't, but it is when your government is a constitutional republic that everyone pretends is a democracy. Having a tyrant/dictator/king/emperor rule over all the states through a system of appointing local and state officials is a much more viable option. Capitalism as we know it would have to die. Oh well. The king is dead; long live the king.

Few states could survive well on their own. Texas would be just fine, and the Gulf states could band together or even join with Texas. I don't think any of the landlocked states could do it unless they joined with a state that has a legitimate port. States are pretty intertwined when it comes to power grids, transportation, food supply, etc. Again, Texas comes out pretty much unscathed. But they don't have enough to gain by leaving, so they won't.
 
2012-11-13 10:10:26 AM  

indarwinsshadow: What you need is a petition to give up your United States and become provinces of Canada. You'd have universal health care, a dollar that's worth something, access to all the oil you'd need, room to expand, you'd be able to travel anywhere in the world without being shot at, and access to Tim Hortons and all the hockey games you ever wanted to attend. The only draw back is you have to tolerate Quebec.


you're Britain. Didn't we fight a war to separate from you guys??
 
2012-11-13 10:10:45 AM  

Biness: Tumunga: Bathia_Mapes: 1) Assuming that the signees were born and raised in the U.S., where are they to be deported?

2) Punishing them for signing a petition would be a violation of their First Amendment rights.

So? If those states succeed from the union, who is going to help fund my Section 8 housing, and food stamps? There won't be enough tax payers in the states that are left to help fund all this.

I see nothing wrong with getting rid of a few toothless knuckleheads in order for me to have the right of free housing and food steal other people's property because i'm too lazy to work.

ftfy


Stealing? No, it's paying your fair share because I'm too lazy to work. Get it right.
 
2012-11-13 10:11:28 AM  

Krymson Tyde: Slaxl: All you need to do is designate one state "Republicanland", promise them their independence once all proponents of a Republican Jesus state have moved there. That way it's not in anyway a violation of free speech. It's people getting what they want. Just choose a state you can all be rid of happily, preferably one that is already majority Republican, to avoid the impact on Democrats who will have to move out.

Arizona would work well. We could finance moving everyone out who wants out since we'd ultimately be saving tons of money. Also we could admit Puerto Rico to return to 50 states.


Those asswipes are NOT getting The Grand Canyon. Give them, like, Idaho or something.
 
2012-11-13 10:11:31 AM  
Reading this thread is making me feel like I'm on reddit
 
2012-11-13 10:11:40 AM  
so the left doesn't want to deport people who are in the country illegally, but does want to deport US citizens who exercise their constitutional rights.

that is all you need to know about the left.
 
2012-11-13 10:11:43 AM  

Baz744: Millennium: phrawgh: The very definition of traitor.

They have not made war upon the US, nor aided its enemies. Thus, what they've done doesn't fit the Constitutional definition of a traitor. It's very clear about that.

The prospect of an American civil war aids America's enemies, and gives them comfort by boosting their morale.


Well thats a reach if i've ever seen one.

And whilst we're near the subject, the conflict of 1861-1865 was not a civil war. A civil war, by definition, is two or more factions fighting for control of one government or one nation. The American "civil war" was not that. It was a war for independence. The south did not seek to control the country, just their territory.
 
2012-11-13 10:11:52 AM  

alaric3: An off shore barge.

Not punishing them. Rewarding them. They aren't happy here.


ecmoRandomNumbers: I like your positive spin and can-do attitude.


Like this guy said.
 
2012-11-13 10:13:46 AM  

BoxOfBees: Few states could survive well on their own. Texas would be just fine, and the Gulf states could band together or even join with Texas. I don't think any of the landlocked states could do it unless they joined with a state that has a legitimate port.


I think if great lakes states were to band together they'd have a shot.
 
2012-11-13 10:13:53 AM  

propasaurus: 1) Texas. Deport them all to Texas. But not Austin.


What makes Austin what it is, is the rest of Texas around it. Pull Austin out of Texas and then all you have left is the equivelant of Lafayette, IN or Ames, IA.
 
2012-11-13 10:14:19 AM  

Shyla: Finally! A petition I can get behind. The US needs to buy some land in the Maldives, since they are sinking, I heard you can buy them pretty cheap, and move all those basturds there.

PROBLEM SOLVED.


I bet they would start studying-it-out on global warming when the land beneath them is being swamped by rising sea levels.
 
2012-11-13 10:14:58 AM  

Biness: And whilst we're near the subject, the conflict of 1861-1865 was not a civil war. A civil war, by definition, is two or more factions fighting for control of one government or one nation. The American "civil war" was not that. It was a war for independence. The south did not seek to control the country, just their territory.


Not sure if serious...
 
2012-11-13 10:15:21 AM  
Hey, while we're at it, can we also deport all the people who said they were going to leave the country if Bush Junior got re-elected, then didn't?
 
2012-11-13 10:15:29 AM  

ursomniac: Slaxl: All you need to do is designate one state "Republicanland", promise them their independence once all proponents of a Republican Jesus state have moved there. That way it's not in anyway a violation of free speech. It's people getting what they want. Just choose a state you can all be rid of happily, preferably one that is already majority Republican, to avoid the impact on Democrats who will have to move out.

I'm really REALLY starting to think this is a solution. Give them Texas - put Romney in charge, build a wall, and broadcast a live feed to the US from cameras on the top.

As they completely portray the "Bob the Angry Flower" cartoon depicting the aftermath of Atlas Shrugged, we can both laugh at their stupidity and educate everyone else as to why a functioning society has to actually function on more than "screw you I've got mine".


I just googled the cartoon. ROFLMAOBBQ! Years ago, I tried reading the book, and I made it about halfway through before I couldn't stand it anymore.

Politics makes strange bedfellows indeed, and nothing stranger than seeing amoral corporate anarchists and rabid extremist "Christians" working together to tear our country apart.
 
2012-11-13 10:15:30 AM  
Is it just me, or is this "We the People" website turning into 4chan/pol/?

You'd think an administration as net-savvy as the Obama's would know about internet trolling by now.
 
2012-11-13 10:16:01 AM  

Baz744: Millennium: phrawgh: The very definition of traitor.

They have not made war upon the US, nor aided its enemies. Thus, what they've done doesn't fit the Constitutional definition of a traitor. It's very clear about that.

The prospect of an American civil war aids America's enemies, and gives them comfort by boosting their morale.


Except that there is no credible prospect of an American civil war, and even if there were, "boosting their morale" is not material aid nor comfort.
 
2012-11-13 10:16:03 AM  

bacongood: Would this include any idiot who put up one those "Bush isn't my president" signs?

Everyone needs to grow up; we picked from two different flavors of vanilla.


Good point, but falling on deaf ears I'm afraid. Ain't no hatred like sore winner hatred.
 
2012-11-13 10:16:17 AM  

tenpoundsofcheese: so the left doesn't want to deport people who are in the country illegally, but does want to deport US citizens who exercise their constitutional rights.

that is all you need to know about the left.


then those that do can still get free health care, instate tuition, run accross the border and have anchor babies, get jobs and send all the cash to Texas and access to welfare via sanctuary cities.... cool.
 
2012-11-13 10:16:25 AM  

Nhojwolfe: propasaurus: Bathia_Mapes: 1) Assuming that the signees were born and raised in the U.S., where are they to be deported?

2) Punishing them for signing a petition would be a violation of their First Amendment rights.

1) Texas. Deport them all to Texas. But not Austin.

2) Fine, Capt. Buzzkill. Be all literal and logical.

Harumph.

We should send them all to Cali, Most of them to L/a

//It is a hole that is going to fall off in the ocean sooner or later anyways.


WTF! We don't want them here. What about Idaho, South Dakota, somewhere REAL cold.
 
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