If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Next Movie)   Nymphographic: exactly how many girls has James Bond slept with?   (nextmovie.com) divider line 79
    More: Silly, James Bond, bond girl, sexual intercourses, chutzpah, Charlie Sheen  
•       •       •

7234 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Nov 2012 at 3:28 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



79 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2012-11-12 02:42:00 PM
0 because he's not real?
 
2012-11-12 03:29:49 PM
all of them?
 
2012-11-12 03:31:02 PM
I dunno, but he's definitely had Pussy Galore.
 
2012-11-12 03:34:26 PM
I don't know how you've done it, James, but you have 107 different venereal diseases. 53 of them have been identified.. we've sent samples of 36 others to the disease control center in Atlanta - they won't return our calls. The other 18, we've never seen before. They actually found some way to mutate spontaneously with other bits and pieces of venereal disease inside of you. They're so rare that we don't even have names for hem, so we're naming them "Bond-1", "Bond-2", and so on.
 
2012-11-12 03:36:03 PM

Jamdug!: 0 because he's not real?


So tied with most farkers?
sweet.
 
2012-11-12 03:38:16 PM

Shostie: I don't know how you've done it, James, but you have 107 different venereal diseases. 53 of them have been identified.. we've sent samples of 36 others to the disease control center in Atlanta - they won't return our calls. The other 18, we've never seen before. They actually found some way to mutate spontaneously with other bits and pieces of venereal disease inside of you. They're so rare that we don't even have names for hem, so we're naming them "Bond-1", "Bond-2", and so on.


One of SNL's better skits.
 
2012-11-12 03:40:06 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: I dunno, but he's definitely had Pussy Galore.


Winner.
 
2012-11-12 03:49:24 PM
That we know of?
I beat him out on that count.
But he was always my hero, so I did learn a lot of skills.
 
2012-11-12 03:51:14 PM
I can only see up to moonraker, is there another infographic? am I that frutada that I can't figure out the site?
 
2012-11-12 03:52:50 PM

thecpt: I can only see up to moonraker, is there another infographic? am I that frutada that I can't figure out the site?


There's a link to Buzzfeed in the first few paragraphs that show the whole thing. This is a case of subby linking to a page with a link to a page instead of just linking the original page.
 
2012-11-12 03:55:51 PM
Careful letting this number out- One day their might be a gay 007.
 
2012-11-12 03:56:51 PM
It's okay, he was using a bionic stunt penis.
 
2012-11-12 03:59:19 PM
No Skyfall?

?SPOILERS

I argued with my friends about his encounters in Skyfall. I said he didn't do MP. It wasn't shown or implied to me, and further it was MP and that is a strictly flirtatious relationship historically/sidewaysally
 
2012-11-12 04:00:41 PM

thecpt: No Skyfall?

?SPOILERS

I argued with my friends about his encounters in Skyfall. I said he didn't do MP. It wasn't shown or implied to me, and further it was MP and that is a strictly flirtatious relationship historically/sidewaysally


That Member of Parliament? I didn't see a hint of that.
 
2012-11-12 04:03:13 PM
Oops. Picture of MP in question.

www.flicksandbits.com
 
2012-11-12 04:05:00 PM

litespeed74: Careful letting this number out- One day their might be a gay 007.


David Bowie and Mick Jagger had sex, not because they're gay, it's just that banging every 19y/o groupie gets kinda old, and 'hey? Let's try this' kind of attitude. I think we're pretty safe from having a gay bond, he seems quite content with banging female hotties, and what some one else said up thread, he's not real.
 
2012-11-12 04:06:18 PM
53 women in 50 years?
Wow.

53 women for me was the summer of '79.
 
2012-11-12 04:08:12 PM

Wellon Dowd: Oops. Picture of MP in question.

[www.flicksandbits.com image 825x550]


No,thats why he hit the fire extinguishers during the shoot out. He ran up to that table to reassure all of them when noone could see it, but she wouldn't shut up so he stuck it in her mouf. You could see it through the smoke, but maybe only if you were in an imax theater.

I'm talking about the girl who shot him.
 
2012-11-12 04:21:35 PM
0, because he's too busy farking them.
 
2012-11-12 04:24:14 PM

FunkOut: It's okay, he was using a bionic stunt penis.


Is that what were calling Big Jim Slade nowadays?
 
2012-11-12 04:24:58 PM

FunkOut: It's okay, he was using a bionic stunt penis.


Is that what we're calling Big Jim Slade nowadays?
 
2012-11-12 04:28:28 PM

Le Bomb Suprize: FunkOut: It's okay, he was using a bionic stunt penis.

Is that what were calling Big Jim Slade nowadays?


I just wanted to say good luck. We're all counting on you.
 
2012-11-12 04:30:47 PM
Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?
 
2012-11-12 04:33:05 PM

ZeroCorpse: Shostie: I don't know how you've done it, James, but you have 107 different venereal diseases. 53 of them have been identified.. we've sent samples of 36 others to the disease control center in Atlanta - they won't return our calls. The other 18, we've never seen before. They actually found some way to mutate spontaneously with other bits and pieces of venereal disease inside of you. They're so rare that we don't even have names for hem, so we're naming them "Bond-1", "Bond-2", and so on.

One of SNL's better skits.


I have to go. Bond-7 escaped from its container
 
2012-11-12 04:34:41 PM
All those years and he never boned Moneypenny?
 
2012-11-12 04:37:51 PM

Prey4reign: All those years and he never boned Moneypenny?


I think that's on purpose, a long-running trope. Flirting with the boss's secretary was probably a masculine past time back in the Mad Men era.
 
2012-11-12 04:37:51 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: I dunno, but he's definitely had Pussy Galore.


Yes, but what's her named?
 
2012-11-12 04:38:55 PM

Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?


I say no, but that's because I'm in the "he slept with Eve/lady who shot him" camp.
 
2012-11-12 04:42:32 PM
It's not the quantity,
It's the quality...
 
2012-11-12 04:42:54 PM

Solon Isonomia: Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?

I say no, but that's because I'm in the "he slept with Eve/lady who shot him" camp.


Yeah, I'm not in that camp but he was boning a girl in his tropical hut in the beginning. She might have lived.
 
2012-11-12 04:43:52 PM

Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?


Bond girls dying after having sex with him isn't exactly a new thing, even when he's not the one killing them. It was pretty prevalent for Sean Connery's Bond, too. (See Goldfinger for the iconic example.) I'm disappointed the graphic didn't show the mortality rate.
 
2012-11-12 04:44:17 PM
Do the skull ones mean he banged them after they died?
 
2012-11-12 04:47:24 PM
Meh, Captain James T Kirk is still the King.
 
2012-11-12 04:47:40 PM

thecpt: Solon Isonomia: Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?

I say no, but that's because I'm in the "he slept with Eve/lady who shot him" camp.

Yeah, I'm not in that camp but he was boning a girl in his tropical hut in the beginning. She might have lived.


I'm sure he poured ground up glass into her food or maybe she picked up his drink instead and got stung by that scorpion or something.
 
2012-11-12 04:48:18 PM

killzoe: Meh, Captain James T Kirk is still the King.


He cheated - he wasn't limited to humans.
 
2012-11-12 04:50:32 PM

Joelogon: Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?

Bond girls dying after having sex with him isn't exactly a new thing, even when he's not the one killing them. It was pretty prevalent for Sean Connery's Bond, too. (See Goldfinger for the iconic example.) I'm disappointed the graphic didn't show the mortality rate.


They had skulls next to the Bond girls that died.
 
2012-11-12 04:55:37 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-11-12 04:58:30 PM
Careful letting this number out- One day their might be a gay 007.

I was thinking as I eyed all those ♀s that one day there has to be a ♂. A real spy would play double agent.
 
2012-11-12 05:02:14 PM

ZAZ: Careful letting this number out- One day their might be a gay 007.

I was thinking as I eyed all those ♀s that one day there has to be a ♂. A real spy would play double agent.


Go watch Goldfinger and how Connery escapes from the basement jail cell.
 
2012-11-12 05:04:53 PM
I'm loving this. Fark is all Bond, all day.

I will always love Vesper Lynd. Always.

"you know, former SAS types with easy smiles and expensive watches....Rolex?
"Omega"
"Beautiful"

/"I'm the money"
//swoon
 
2012-11-12 05:04:56 PM

Solon Isonomia: Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?

I say no, but that's because I'm in the "he slept with Eve/lady who shot him" camp.


Nope, SPOILER ALERT
.
.
Skyfall - the girl he was hanging out with after being shot by Eve.
I thought he got Eve in one of the earlier Craig-Bond movies but Quantum and Casino aren't in Naomie's IMDB credits.
Sheesh, was it really 4 years between Quantum and Skyfall?
 
2012-11-12 05:06:26 PM

Odd Bird: Solon Isonomia: Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?

I say no, but that's because I'm in the "he slept with Eve/lady who shot him" camp.

Nope, SPOILER ALERT
.
.
Skyfall - the girl he was hanging out with after being shot by Eve.
I thought he got Eve in one of the earlier Craig-Bond movies but Quantum and Casino aren't in Naomie's IMDB credits.
Sheesh, was it really 4 years between Quantum and Skyfall?


Oh, no, I was thinking after the shaving bit.
 
2012-11-12 05:14:21 PM

Solon Isonomia: Oh, no, I was thinking after the shaving bit.


That's going to be debated forever isn't it? Both sides could easily draw their conclusion. To me they just seamed more like friends who respected each other and playfully flirted. They were getting all cleaned up before the casino so I assumed they wouldn't get messy beforehand. That being said they were eyefarking the shiat out of each other.
 
2012-11-12 05:16:26 PM
I'm waiting for the Bond movie where he beds some men.
 
2012-11-12 05:22:36 PM

Keizer_Ghidorah: I'm waiting for the Bond movie where he beds some men.


Maybe he'll head into space again.

i2.listal.com
 
2012-11-12 05:22:38 PM
Who knows? The infographic is missing a movie so it's incomplete.
 
2012-11-12 05:29:40 PM

FunkOut: It's okay, he was using a bionic stunt penis.


That explains the scene with Grace Jones.
 
2012-11-12 05:35:52 PM

Evil Mackerel: FunkOut: It's okay, he was using a bionic stunt penis.

That explains the scene with Grace Jones.


i1089.photobucket.com



/ grace jones is one sexy diva
 
2012-11-12 05:37:28 PM

cgraves67: They had skulls next to the Bond girls that died.


Ah. Well, there you go. Apparently sleeping with Daniel Craig's Bond is indeed hazardous to one's health.
 
2012-11-12 05:43:09 PM
Sooooo... less than Tiger Woods or Charlie Sheen?
 
2012-11-12 05:46:50 PM
He NEVER has and NEVER will sleep with moneypenny that's the only rule 34 the internet is not allowed to make.
 
2012-11-12 05:47:33 PM

Solon Isonomia: Fark You Buddy: Is it just me or has every single Bond girl that Craig farked died?

I say no, but that's because I'm in the "he slept with Eve/lady who shot him" camp.


Craig & Eve definitely did the deed, and that actually fits with the unspoken backstory that Fleming came up with for
the characters in the books:

Fleming always assumed that Bond & the equivalent character from the books shared a 'bank holiday weekend' (as
Fleming put it), and though they still have a certain chemistry between them, it will never amount to anything.
 
2012-11-12 06:04:59 PM
No love for Never Say Never Again? I mean, I know it's not a EON Production, but it's got Connery! And it's actually a decent Bond movie!

With all the Bond literature flying here and there and everywhere, a little love for this movie! I saw, slip that movie into the chart! Get that # of Boat scenes up!
 
2012-11-12 06:07:17 PM

paswa17: ZAZ: Careful letting this number out- One day their might be a gay 007.

I was thinking as I eyed all those ♀s that one day there has to be a ♂. A real spy would play double agent.

Go watch Goldfinger and how Connery escapes from the basement jail cell.


Or you could watch a particular scene in this movie:

img.movieberry.com

While not James Bond it IS a pre-Bond Brosnan getting his gay on. Sort of.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-11-12 06:10:58 PM
fusillade762

I saw The Fourth Protocol when it was new. I don't remember the gay stuff 25 years later. Probably distracted by the cute girl sitting next to me.
 
2012-11-12 06:27:50 PM

ZAZ: fusillade762

I saw The Fourth Protocol when it was new. I don't remember the gay stuff 25 years later. Probably distracted by the cute girl sitting next to me.


There's a scene in an airport bathroom where some guy sees him doing something suspicious. Since the guy seems to be coming on to him he lures him out to his car. When the guy leans down to give him a BJ he snaps his neck.
 
2012-11-12 06:53:01 PM
It was actually part of Sean Connery's contract to bed his leading lady. It was known as the 'Honey Ryder'.

*ba dum tish*

/the veal, like the jokes, are off tonight
 
2012-11-12 07:11:40 PM
I wouldn't mind if there was more of this: 

i470.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-12 07:25:45 PM
Does that include the Bond girl who used to be a man?

www.thedragnet.org
 
2012-11-12 07:26:36 PM
It seems like a modern Bond would be a bit more Captain Jack Harkness in the seduction department.
 
2012-11-12 07:38:25 PM
i470.photobucket.com

"Were you expecting an exploding penis? We don't really go in for that anymore."
 
2012-11-12 08:57:44 PM

fusillade762: paswa17: ZAZ: Careful letting this number out- One day their might be a gay 007.

I was thinking as I eyed all those ♀s that one day there has to be a ♂. A real spy would play double agent.

Go watch Goldfinger and how Connery escapes from the basement jail cell.

Or you could watch a particular scene in this movie:

[img.movieberry.com image 500x743]

While not James Bond it IS a pre-Bond Brosnan getting his gay on. Sort of.


you may have also meant this:

ecx.images-amazon.com

t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-12 09:42:44 PM

Gordon Bennett: Does that include the Bond girl who used to be a man?

[www.thedragnet.org image 500x643]


he never slept with Tula, she was more of a 'poolside girl' ..

That said, I wouldn't kick her out of bed..

img1.bdbphotos.com

the one on the left.

transdiva.h.fc2.com

/hotlinked
//history is just that, history.
 
2012-11-12 09:48:16 PM

strutin: Gordon Bennett: Does that include the Bond girl who used to be a man?

[www.thedragnet.org image 500x643]

he never slept with Tula, she was more of a 'poolside girl' ..

That said, I wouldn't kick her out of bed..

[img1.bdbphotos.com image 454x362]

the one on the left.

[transdiva.h.fc2.com image 348x630]

/hotlinked
//history is just that, history.


I'm thinking about asking her out again.
 
2012-11-12 10:06:26 PM

vudukungfu: strutin: Gordon Bennett: Does that include the Bond girl who used to be a man?

[www.thedragnet.org image 500x643]

he never slept with Tula, she was more of a 'poolside girl' ..

That said, I wouldn't kick her out of bed..

[img1.bdbphotos.com image 454x362]

the one on the left.

[transdiva.h.fc2.com image 348x630]

/hotlinked
//history is just that, history.

I'm thinking about asking her out again.


Dude, you know she's like old now, right?
 
2012-11-12 10:11:59 PM

rotorschnee: No love for Never Say Never Again? I mean, I know it's not a EON Production, but it's got Connery! And it's actually a decent Bond movie!

With all the Bond literature flying here and there and everywhere, a little love for this movie! I saw, slip that movie into the chart! Get that # of Boat scenes up!


It's a better Thunderball adaptation than Thunderball.
 
2012-11-12 10:18:26 PM
Sylvia Trench? I think I know her sister, Rebecca Hallway.
 
2012-11-12 10:41:20 PM

maxx2112: grace jones is one sexy diva


Wow. You and I definitely have different tastes in women.
 
2012-11-12 10:53:09 PM

Prey4reign: All those years and he never boned Moneypenny?


Bond will never sleep with Moneypenny because she's the only woman he respects.
 
2012-11-12 11:44:47 PM

Richard Roma: Prey4reign: All those years and he never boned Moneypenny?

Bond will never sleep with Moneypenny because she's the only woman he respects.


She'd peg him and he'd like it.
 
2012-11-12 11:53:18 PM
Spoilers

The thing with Eve/Moneypenny was odd because directly after the shaving sequence there is a cutaway to fireworks going off....a very clear innuendo in movies, and yet there was an earlier tasteful sex scene in the movie, so they could have shown something more direct. It's very clear that the director is trying to mess a bit with the audience, otherwise why stage the shot with the fireworks.
 
2012-11-13 12:26:16 AM

Theseus: Spoilers

The thing with Eve/Moneypenny was odd because directly after the shaving sequence there is a cutaway to fireworks going off....a very clear innuendo in movies, and yet there was an earlier tasteful sex scene in the movie, so they could have shown something more direct. It's very clear that the director is trying to mess a bit with the audience, otherwise why stage the shot with the fireworks.


To show that...he loves her...gayness.
 
2012-11-13 02:45:31 AM

vudukungfu: 53 women in 50 years?
Wow.

53 women for me was the summer of '79.


Quality is the issue, not quantity.
 
2012-11-13 04:44:37 AM
My wife and I had the same discussion, about whether Craig's Bond nailed Moneypenny or not. We decided he did, but off-screen and that was deliberate. It's hard to believe Bond would let a woman that close to him without farking her, especially after she shaves him with a straight razor.

/Bond nailed Green a lot more than twice in Casino Royale, too
//they were on a farking boat for nearly a week, you know
 
2012-11-13 05:46:54 AM
List seems to have left off Solange, from Casino Royale, played by Catarina Murino.

www.wiki-cine.com

Who could overlook her?
 
2012-11-13 08:38:35 AM

LonMead: List seems to have left off Solange, from Casino Royale, played by Catarina Murino.

[www.wiki-cine.com image 400x600]

Who could overlook her?


I thought she was hotter than Eva Green
 
2012-11-13 08:43:26 AM

John Buck 41: LonMead: List seems to have left off Solange, from Casino Royale, played by Catarina Murino.

[www.wiki-cine.com image 400x600]

Who could overlook her?

I thought she was hotter than Eva Green


Quite.
 
2012-11-13 08:49:04 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-13 09:08:23 AM
I have yet to read the article. I am going to see if I can guess the number per movies

Doctor No - 1
From Russia with Love - 2
Goldfinger - 2
Thunderball - 2
You Only Live Twice - 2
On Her Majesty's Secret Service - I think 10
Diamond's Are Forever - 1
Live and Let Die - 2
The Spy Who Loved Me - 1
Moonraker - 1
Man with the Golden Gun - 2
View to a Kill - 1
Octopussy - 1
For Your Eyes Only - 1
Living Daylights - 2
License to Kill - 2
Goldeneye - 2
Tomorrow Never Dies - 2
World is not Enough - 2
Die Another Day - 1
Casino Royale - 1
Quantum of Solace - 1
Skyfall - 1

By my count (using my memory): 43 on film

After reading the article... Wow, I was off by half. damn it!
 
Displayed 79 of 79 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report