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(Daily Mail)   Bad news: Researchers confirm size does matter. Good news: But only to some women and some types of orgasms: Best news: Your hand couldn't care less   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 517
    More: Interesting, Sexual Medicine, University of the West, scientific journals, orgasms, sexual behaviors, computer user satisfaction, sex life, penis length  
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12709 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Nov 2012 at 11:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-12 04:26:08 PM

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


Hawt.
 
2012-11-12 04:28:31 PM

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


I was gonna send you my moobs later, but now that's ruined......
 
2012-11-12 04:35:15 PM

SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.


This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.
 
2012-11-12 04:39:25 PM

MoronLessOff: I'm pretty sure that's the worst possible way to deal with that situation.


Last thing I want is to be a divorced Dad seeing my kid call some other dude "Dad". She's only 2 years old. Maybe that's selfish. Most of the time my wife and I get on alright...if it gets bad enough that all my daughter sees is acrimony and hostility then I will become a bit more proactive.

kiwimoogle84: EIP. Tell me about it. I've talked with other friends and I think I've helped them. Always an ear for a Fark friend. *hugs*


I think it's a case of being together for a very long time (since the late 1990's) and getting tired of each other's idiosyncrasies. She is stubborn and never admits she is wrong or says she is sorry. I am hot headed and have a short fuse for irrational behavior. Add to that the strains of being parents, each of us having careers, and the natural proclivity for a woman's sex drive to diminish as a long term relationship ages, and there is little sexytime and the little bit is kind of lame. Funny thing is she almost always orgasms when we do and she's not the type to fake it (plus there are ways to tell)

I don't think my situation is unique at all. Lots of married people go through this. There is a reason pron is such an industry, and hookers make money.
 
2012-11-12 04:39:40 PM

catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.


I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis
 
2012-11-12 04:39:43 PM

SarahDiddle: My god, it could be a coffee table book!


You could always see if these guys would be willing to pose for the cover: Puppetry of the Penis

Link
 
2012-11-12 04:40:07 PM
Oh, what the Hell...

BIE?

EIP...
 
2012-11-12 04:41:34 PM

catmacgregor: This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.


Shake it more than twice and you're playing with it!
 
2012-11-12 04:42:32 PM

H31N0US: I don't think my situation is unique at all. Lots of married people go through this.


I know that feel, bro.
 
2012-11-12 04:44:44 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.


Id volunteer.
 
2012-11-12 04:48:56 PM
i haz a happy :)
 
2012-11-12 04:49:40 PM

kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis


I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?
 
2MS [TotalFark]
2012-11-12 04:50:21 PM
I just want to thanks a couple of folks. It's always nice to make new friends.
 
2012-11-12 04:50:47 PM
I need some BIE too!
EIP

will happily reciprocate with wie, it has multiple times by different partners been described as perfect.
 
2012-11-12 04:51:55 PM

kiwimoogle84: Princess Ryans Knickers: Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.

Well, you CAN feel how big one is, how it fills you (or doesn't). Technique matters a lot here. Rhythmic in-out-in-out wont quite do it. Tease a bit, change angles, use your hands during, etc.

So while that's an interesting idea, I personally will have a better sexual experience with someone who cares about what he's doing, and about ME, hence why I don't do one night stands. Some women can have sex with just anyone and enjoy it. I can't.


They've run tests like this before when it comes to food tasting. Wine tasters swearing up and down they can "tell the difference" between the various brands of wines. The blind taste tests proved them wrong. Sex, like so much else, is all in your head. You are having a placebo effect.
 
2012-11-12 04:53:48 PM

Princess Ryans Knickers: kiwimoogle84: Princess Ryans Knickers: Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.

Well, you CAN feel how big one is, how it fills you (or doesn't). Technique matters a lot here. Rhythmic in-out-in-out wont quite do it. Tease a bit, change angles, use your hands during, etc.

So while that's an interesting idea, I personally will have a better sexual experience with someone who cares about what he's doing, and about ME, hence why I don't do one night stands. Some women can have sex with just anyone and enjoy it. I can't.

They've run tests like this before when it comes to food tasting. Wine tasters swearing up and down they can "tell the difference" between the various brands of wines. The blind taste tests proved them wrong. Sex, like so much else, is all in your head. You are having a placebo effect.


*shrug* if that's what you think. You've never been a woman, I take it.

Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.
 
2012-11-12 04:54:22 PM
Many thanks ladies.
 
2012-11-12 04:54:28 PM

Meatschool: catmacgregor: This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

Shake it more than twice and you're playing with it!


So if I let go after shaking twice, I'm not obligated to go any further? Best easy out card ever.
 
2012-11-12 04:55:04 PM

Space Station Wagon: I need some BIE too!
EIP

will happily reciprocate with wie, it has multiple times by different partners been described as perfect.


"perfect" is another cruel code for saying it's kinda small. Send it though, I don't discriminate!
 
2012-11-12 04:58:08 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis

I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?


I just thought it was a funny play on words.

Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?
 
2012-11-12 05:00:23 PM

kiwimoogle84: Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?


For some reason, that made ME blush...
 
2MS [TotalFark]
2012-11-12 05:01:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis

I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?

I just thought it was a funny play on words.

Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?


That made me tremble a little...
 
2012-11-12 05:02:50 PM

kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.


*joke about taste test*
 
2012-11-12 05:04:53 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*


Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.
 
2012-11-12 05:08:06 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*


A whale drawn on it... a Sperm Whale, no doubt
 
2012-11-12 05:09:04 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.


I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.
 
2012-11-12 05:11:52 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.


I've been told cranberry juice does the same. Perhaps someone would like to help verify this with me?

*wink*
 
2012-11-12 05:11:53 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.


Of course women who don't swallow would say such a thing. But it's usually a lot, like four glasses over two days. Then the end of the second day...
 
2012-11-12 05:13:01 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.


I've heard about it... never tried the pineapple juice thing though. May have to stop at the store on the way home tonight.
 
2012-11-12 05:13:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...


So...what are you doing Wednesday evening?
 
2012-11-12 05:13:19 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.

Of course women who don't swallow would say such a thing. But it's usually a lot, like four glasses over two days. Then the end of the second day...


Asparagus is right out.
 
2012-11-12 05:13:20 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis

I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?

I just thought it was a funny play on words.

Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?


I am generally pleased with today's events, yes. :]
 
2012-11-12 05:13:51 PM

kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...


he fixes the cable?
 
2012-11-12 05:14:48 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?


More like laying down the cable, amiright?
 
2012-11-12 05:15:36 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?


No silly, he cleans the gutters.
 
2012-11-12 05:18:24 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?

No silly, he cleans the gutters.


While she cleans the pipes of course.
 
2012-11-12 05:18:51 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?


If you weren't already going on the friends list, you would for that.

/that's my robe, man
 
2012-11-12 05:19:56 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

So...what are you doing Wednesday evening?


Measuring doses of painkillers for a family member who just had surgery? It's why I'm here after all. But I'm with you in spirit.

You guys are funny :)
 
2012-11-12 05:20:23 PM

kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.


Yes, but which was a larger bottle?
 
2012-11-12 05:21:55 PM

poot_rootbeer: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

Yes, but which was a larger bottle?


I just spit Nutella and pretzels out all over my coffee table. You win the internets today, my friend.
 
2012-11-12 05:22:24 PM

kiwimoogle84: Measuring doses of painkillers for a family member who just had surgery?


One for them, one for me, one for them, two for me...
 
2012-11-12 05:23:17 PM
"It's weird that pineapple supposedly makes semen taste better. Yet semen makes pineapple taste terrible!"
-Harris's Foam Corner
 
2012-11-12 05:26:11 PM
Any sweet substance will improve the flavor. Do limit the red meat. Yes, if a woman says this is a myth, she just plain doesn't want to swallow.
 
2012-11-12 05:26:22 PM

El Supe: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*

A whale drawn on it... a Sperm Whale, no doubt


Moby Dick, of course.
 
2012-11-12 05:30:28 PM
And please, if it's been awhile, do an oil change before you expect her to swallow. It tends to take on a chunky texture that us far from appetizing
 
2012-11-12 05:32:02 PM

poison_amy: And please, if it's been awhile, do an oil change before you expect her to swallow. It tends to take on a chunky texture that us far from appetizing


I've never heard it put so eloquently! Bill Hicks referred to it as the Wax Dart. "Please baby! I'll buy you a seeing eye dog!"
 
2012-11-12 05:35:18 PM

poison_amy: And please, if it's been awhile, do an oil change before you expect her to swallow. It tends to take on a chunky texture that us far from appetizing


Wow... that's... yeah.
 
2012-11-12 05:39:13 PM

poison_amy: o an oil change before you exp


I've never heard this euphemism before... is this obscure, or have i been out of the loop for a while?
 
2012-11-12 05:41:38 PM
Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P
 
2012-11-12 05:42:50 PM
It is extempore, from my mother wit.

And THAT was Shakespeare.
 
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