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(Daily Mail)   Bad news: Researchers confirm size does matter. Good news: But only to some women and some types of orgasms: Best news: Your hand couldn't care less   (dailymail.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Interesting, Sexual Medicine, University of the West, scientific journals, orgasms, sexual behaviors, computer user satisfaction, sex life, penis length  
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12736 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Nov 2012 at 11:28 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



517 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2012-11-12 02:55:24 PM  

ShobuZukuri: I'll probably get in trouble for this but, it's too funny to pass up.

[www.demotivationalposters.org image 640x589]


rocketdock.com
 
2012-11-12 02:55:52 PM  

ShobuZukuri: I'll probably get in trouble for this but, it's too funny to pass up.


HAAAA!!!! I love it! Mine is less horse teeth and more flushed in the cheeks. But it applies.
 
2012-11-12 02:58:18 PM  

kiwimoogle84: Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.


See, you need to be above average size to do that.
 
2012-11-12 02:59:48 PM  

StoPPeRmobile: kiwimoogle84: Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.

See, you need to be above average size to do that.


HA! And OW.
 
2012-11-12 03:00:40 PM  

StoPPeRmobile: See, you need to be above average size to do that.


And dress at 90 degree angles.
 
2012-11-12 03:06:54 PM  

SarahDiddle: I think my vagina screamed in horror.


Says the woman who's into interrobangs...
 
2012-11-12 03:08:55 PM  

HAMMERTOE: into interrobangs


I'm more a Percontation man myself.
 
2012-11-12 03:09:59 PM  
I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.
 
2012-11-12 03:11:46 PM  

kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.


Whoa there missy! Being a douche is primarily an oral skill.
 
2012-11-12 03:14:33 PM  

kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.


I'm not going to brag on my oral skills, nor say that I'm terrible at it. I'll just say that I love to make my lady happy... and when she's happy... I'm well taken care of.
 
2012-11-12 03:18:50 PM  

kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.


Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.
 
2012-11-12 03:21:26 PM  

poison_amy: Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


What!? That's half the fun :)
 
2012-11-12 03:22:25 PM  

poison_amy: kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.

Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


I love to go down, but I'm not sure how it would work with the new beard.
 
2012-11-12 03:24:13 PM  

MoronLessOff: I love to go down, but I'm not sure how it would work with the new beard.


She'll be fine. You, OTOH, should stop deluding yourself.

/nttawwt
 
2012-11-12 03:24:26 PM  

poison_amy: kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.

Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


Bah. I can hold my breath for 5 minutes...
 
2012-11-12 03:24:54 PM  

poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


I also would very much appreciate some of that, please!
/EIP
 
2012-11-12 03:25:42 PM  
E is in P, just in case anyone has a need for it.
 
2012-11-12 03:27:14 PM  

tamsnod27: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

I also would very much appreciate some of that, please!
/EIP


Scroll up for instructions on how to receive
 
2012-11-12 03:29:58 PM  

calm like a bomb: You, OTOH, should stop deluding yourself.


Wat?
 
2012-11-12 03:31:41 PM  

MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: You, OTOH, should stop deluding yourself.

Wat?


I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.
 
2012-11-12 03:33:12 PM  

poison_amy: kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.

Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


THIS! If you want my mouth, you'd better give me yours. What is wrong with some men? *smh*

And holding your breath ain't a big deal, boys. If you know what you're doing, breathing normally shouldn't be an issue. I don't need you to bury your chin in there or anything.
 
2012-11-12 03:33:28 PM  
My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.
 
2012-11-12 03:34:59 PM  

swangoatman: My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.


She won't even BJ you? That's pretty rough. I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage. I'm sorry.

/want BIE?
//eip
 
2012-11-12 03:37:34 PM  

swangoatman: My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.


Hie thee hence to a doc. There are solutions.
 
2012-11-12 03:38:52 PM  

calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.


Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip


You're a hero to many.
 
2012-11-12 03:40:34 PM  

MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.


I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.
 
2012-11-12 03:42:01 PM  

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.

I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.


Hey, I have sympathy. Many friends in sexless relationships. *shrug*
 
2012-11-12 03:43:15 PM  

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.

I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.


She knows my story. Watch this-
BIE? EIP!

That right there is just a shameless request and crossed fingers.
 
2012-11-12 03:44:29 PM  

MoronLessOff: You're a hero to many


I certainly know how she could be mine, but I don't have a good (or sad) story to share. Oh well.
 
2012-11-12 03:45:14 PM  
kiwimoogle84: ...

I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.


It's like catching a glimpse of a unicorn from the corner of your eye...
 
2012-11-12 03:47:02 PM  
What the hell

EIP
 
2012-11-12 03:49:26 PM  

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: but my bones don't work that way

Assuming I'm understanding who's pitching and who's catching here, I'm curious to know how your bones can make enough room for a baby, but not a fist.
[snip]


One of the things that happens to women when they are pregnant is that the ligaments that hold their pelvises together loosen so that there is room for a baby. Sometimes it goes wrong, things loosen up that the women have trouble walking, sometimes things go wrong and the baby won't fit through. It's a good thing we have modern medicine now.
 
2012-11-12 03:50:36 PM  

FSTFKL: SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: but my bones don't work that way

Assuming I'm understanding who's pitching and who's catching here, I'm curious to know how your bones can make enough room for a baby, but not a fist.
[snip]

One of the things that happens to women when they are pregnant is that the ligaments that hold their pelvises together loosen so that there is room for a baby. Sometimes it goes wrong, things loosen up that the women have trouble walking, sometimes things go wrong and the baby won't fit through. It's a good thing we have modern medicine now.


Pffft, no pregnancy has resulted in death for the mother in modern history, because science.
 
2MS
2012-11-12 03:50:50 PM  

poison_amy: swangoatman: My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.

Hie thee hence to a doc. There are solutions.


But not all solution work. Sometimes, you just have to call it a day.
 
2012-11-12 03:52:01 PM  

poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


Well...hello there....BIE

/EIP
 
2012-11-12 03:52:08 PM  

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.

I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.


You two have made this thread quite entertaining.
 
2012-11-12 03:54:22 PM  
oh, and EiP... just in case someone feels like making my work day a lot better :)

/fingers crossed
 
2012-11-12 03:56:04 PM  
I just know this thread has helped with my case of the Mondays... Thanks you guys!
 
2012-11-12 04:07:01 PM  

ferretman: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

Well...hello there....BIE

/EIP


The BIE is there, and it's pretty good, but you have to email ME first!
 
2012-11-12 04:11:54 PM  
/You know who.....
 
2012-11-12 04:12:38 PM  

ferretman: This does not matter for we all know the truth...THE FEMALE ORGASM IS A MYTH!


Married, eh?
 
2012-11-12 04:13:07 PM  
assets0.ordienetworks.com

/Preview is your friend...
 
2012-11-12 04:13:17 PM  

kiwimoogle84: I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage.


Truer words have never been spoken, but, alas, here I am. Also not a fat ugly loser...just not hitting it off with the wife anymore, which is a shame because she is still the most physically attractive woman I've ever been with, and a fantastic mother.

However, I will never abandon my daughter. I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.
 
2012-11-12 04:13:56 PM  
My wife, I mean.
 
2012-11-12 04:14:31 PM  

H31N0US: I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.


I'm pretty sure that's the worst possible way to deal with that situation.
 
2012-11-12 04:17:12 PM  

H31N0US: kiwimoogle84: I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage.

Truer words have never been spoken, but, alas, here I am. Also not a fat ugly loser...just not hitting it off with the wife anymore, which is a shame because she is still the most physically attractive woman I've ever been with, and a fantastic mother.

However, I will never abandon my daughter. I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.


EIP. Tell me about it. I've talked with other friends and I think I've helped them. Always an ear for a Fark friend. *hugs*
 
2012-11-12 04:19:27 PM  
Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.
 
2012-11-12 04:21:51 PM  

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


Did you fap?
 
2012-11-12 04:24:52 PM  

H31N0US: kiwimoogle84: I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage.

Truer words have never been spoken, but, alas, here I am. Also not a fat ugly loser...just not hitting it off with the wife anymore, which is a shame because she is still the most physically attractive woman I've ever been with, and a fantastic mother.

However, I will never abandon my daughter. I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.


Man, these stories are sad... I wish you guys the best. Hopefully you find a way to spark up the passion again.
 
2012-11-12 04:25:54 PM  

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


go on...
 
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