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(Daily Mail)   Bad news: Researchers confirm size does matter. Good news: But only to some women and some types of orgasms: Best news: Your hand couldn't care less   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 517
    More: Interesting, Sexual Medicine, University of the West, scientific journals, orgasms, sexual behaviors, computer user satisfaction, sex life, penis length  
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12707 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Nov 2012 at 11:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-12 11:29:58 AM
images2.makefive.com
 
2012-11-12 11:30:22 AM
It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.
 
2012-11-12 11:31:10 AM
From the institute of NO SH*T, SHERLOCK.
 
2012-11-12 11:31:54 AM
This is why I only have sex with short girls.
 
2012-11-12 11:32:00 AM
Why would i give a shiat anyway... i get off... fark it...
 
2012-11-12 11:32:15 AM
So really it's not the size of the boat or the motion in the ocean, it's really the size of the ocean that the boat is in?
 
2012-11-12 11:32:38 AM
Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
 
2012-11-12 11:33:32 AM

kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.


Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.
 
2012-11-12 11:33:56 AM
www.citybeat.com
 
2012-11-12 11:35:21 AM
Is this where we disagree with the article and boast about our sexual prowess?

Because I like to think of myself as a multi-talented lover. If your only love-tool is your dick, you're missing out on several opportunities to give her multiple orgasms.
 
2012-11-12 11:36:21 AM
so they went around asking alot of girls in todays sex craved enviroment.

//Yeah real scientific there lou
 
2012-11-12 11:36:38 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.


5.1 inches? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! If that's all I had I'd become a monk.
 
2012-11-12 11:36:43 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.

.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.
 
2012-11-12 11:37:39 AM
Length isn't the deciding factor, it's girth, though a minimum length of 5 inches is required in most cases for me. The fuller you feel, the better the sex. Clitoral orgasms are for when i'm alone
 
2012-11-12 11:38:38 AM
While I'm sure size does matter I don't know how a survey counts as standalone research.

"Do you like big dick? A) Yes B) No C) It's a good size"
 
2012-11-12 11:38:40 AM
Meh. Flawed study since it did not address girth.

/amiright Farkettes?
 
2012-11-12 11:38:42 AM

steklo: This is why I only have sex with short girls.


This is why I only have sex with girls who have short vaginas.

And goats. Because, man, goats just don't give a fark.
 
2012-11-12 11:38:56 AM

TFA: "Women are not only be able to orgasm from both vaginal and clitoral stimulation,"


25.media.tumblr.com

 


I'm sorry, Messrs. Gayle and Jones, but the diagnosis is incontrovertible.

 
2012-11-12 11:40:40 AM
What a stupid farking article.

"Stuart Brody, a psychologist at the University of the West of Scotland who conducted the research asked a sample of 323 women about previous sexual encounters.

They were asked about their recent sexual behaviors as well as how important penile-vaginal intercourse and other sex acts were to them. They were also asked whether penis length influenced their ability to orgasm with vaginal stimulation."


This is why no one takes psychologists seriously. Herp derp lets just use self report data. A better study would be to give women randomly sized dildos, tell em to get off in a room and measure how long it takes/how many orgasms but shiat I guess that costs money which no one in the psych department has.
 
2012-11-12 11:41:44 AM
This does not matter for we all know the truth...THE FEMALE ORGASM IS A MYTH!
 
2012-11-12 11:41:52 AM

zelachang: What a stupid farking article.

"Stuart Brody, a psychologist at the University of the West of Scotland who conducted the research asked a sample of 323 women about previous sexual encounters.

They were asked about their recent sexual behaviors as well as how important penile-vaginal intercourse and other sex acts were to them. They were also asked whether penis length influenced their ability to orgasm with vaginal stimulation."

This is why no one takes psychologists seriously. Herp derp lets just use self report data. A better study would be to give women randomly sized dildos, tell em to get off in a room and measure how long it takes/how many orgasms but shiat I guess that costs money which no one in the psych department has.


I will donate money to this kickstarter research program.
 
2012-11-12 11:42:08 AM
Really? The average is only 5.8"? Cool. :)
 
2012-11-12 11:42:40 AM
Why is their such obsession over penis size, but no one gives a hoot about vagina tightness?

I've encountered some bigger than my first apartment.
 
2012-11-12 11:42:48 AM

kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it.


I use mine as a drink mixer. Am I doing it right?
 
2012-11-12 11:42:48 AM
I have a pretty small penis, but lately the warts have really helped add some extra girth and "texture".
 
2012-11-12 11:43:46 AM
Meh. I guess I am slightly longer than average for a Brit (though I am American). One thing I've learned is that just about every girl (who is capable of orgasm) I've ever been with has that one (or maybe two) position that just works for them. You don't have to have a huge dick. Unless that's the only thing the girl cares about, in which case your best strategy is to make the most of it then take off before she dumps you for the bbd that will inevitable come along.

Or, get married, rendering the entire issue moot.
 
2012-11-12 11:44:18 AM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I have a pretty small penis, but lately the warts have really helped add some extra girth and "texture".


They're called love speed bumps
 
2012-11-12 11:44:32 AM

zelachang: This is why no one takes psychologists seriously. Herp derp lets just use self report data. A better study would be to give women randomly sized dildos, tell em to get off in a room and measure how long it takes/how many orgasms but shiat I guess that costs money which no one in the psych department has.


All the researchers would have to do would be to get the subjects to sign a consent form, then do the research in collaberation with a porn site. Funding problem solved.
 
2012-11-12 11:44:36 AM

nmemkha: Why is their such obsession over penis size, but no one gives a hoot about vagina tightness?

I've encountered some bigger than my first apartment.


Which, incidentally, was also a vagina.
 
2012-11-12 11:45:31 AM
Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?
 
2012-11-12 11:46:30 AM

Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?


Dude, it's right there.
 
2012-11-12 11:47:00 AM
Dystopic schmucks. . .
 
2012-11-12 11:47:16 AM
Wait, you're saying women are difficult and picky?

Thank you science.

/I figure I am the right size if the Mrs says so
//if she's lying then that's her loss aint it?
 
2012-11-12 11:47:41 AM
The average size is 5.8 inches? No wonder most of you losers are alone.

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-11-12 11:48:30 AM

Martin Silenus: nmemkha: Why is their such obsession over penis size, but no one gives a hoot about vagina tightness?

I've encountered some bigger than my first apartment.

Which, incidentally, was also a vagina.


Yeah I had such an awesome man cave ... even had a pool table! You had to hold the sticks are weird angles, but it worked.
 
2012-11-12 11:48:39 AM
 
2012-11-12 11:48:54 AM

Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?


You gotta stop dating Somolians, man.
 
2012-11-12 11:49:30 AM

GeekIsGood: zelachang: This is why no one takes psychologists seriously. Herp derp lets just use self report data. A better study would be to give women randomly sized dildos, tell em to get off in a room and measure how long it takes/how many orgasms but shiat I guess that costs money which no one in the psych department has.

All the researchers would have to do would be to get the subjects to sign a consent form, then do the research in collaberation with a porn site. Funding problem solved.


While one side of me wholly supports this idea the other side is worried of a sample bias. But that side is stupid.
 
2012-11-12 11:49:32 AM

Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?


doyoulikelikeme.files.wordpress.com

*Feels your pain*
 
2012-11-12 11:50:23 AM
Thanks Daily Mail!
 
2012-11-12 11:51:28 AM

Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?


OR JOKE #2:

upload.wikimedia.org

I have found the woman of your dreams good sir.
 
2012-11-12 11:52:08 AM

Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.

Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.


Untrue. I've had very sexually satisfying relationships with men who severely lacked in the penile department but could have been a violinist in another life.

And moronlessoff, you stir your shots? :P

/I keed I keed
 
2012-11-12 11:52:37 AM
i guess i need to change my fark handle to: "your above average maint. man"
 
2012-11-12 11:53:47 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: Wait, you're saying women are difficult and picky?


No. What they missed is that women come in different, um, "capacities".

It's the last great taboo of human sexuality: Some women need 12 inches length and the thickness of a coke can to even reach both sides at the same time.

So remember... whenever a woman says, "I prefer big ones", she's really saying she has a huge, cavernous, baby bucket down there. Remember to strap a plank across your ass if you decide you want to go for it.
 
2012-11-12 11:56:08 AM
some chicks just need to be slipped the ol pringles can..
 
2012-11-12 11:56:48 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?

OR JOKE #2:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x330]

I have found the woman of your dreams good sir.


Don't look directly into their eyes. Don't take your eyes off of it. And most important of all: DON'T BLINK.
 
2012-11-12 11:56:51 AM

kiwimoogle84: Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.

Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.

Untrue. I've had very sexually satisfying relationships with men who severely lacked in the penile department but could have been a violinist in another life.

And moronlessoff, you stir your shots? :P

/I keed I keed


It's certainly not unheard-of. Girl I used to know was engaged to a man with a micropenis. An actual, honest-to-God micropenis.

But sample 100 women and I'm pretty sure a majority won't be satisfied with men who have tiny penises.
 
2012-11-12 11:57:39 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?

OR JOKE #2:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x330]

I have found the woman of your dreams good sir.


To paraphrase Patton Oswalt: I would crawl inside her like a tauntaun.
 
2012-11-12 11:58:02 AM

Joce678: Jim from Saint Paul: Wait, you're saying women are difficult and picky?


No. What they missed is that women come in different, um, "capacities".

It's the last great taboo of human sexuality: Some women need 12 inches length and the thickness of a coke can to even reach both sides at the same time.

So remember... whenever a woman says, "I prefer big ones", she's really saying she has a huge, cavernous, baby bucket down there. Remember to strap a plank across your ass if you decide you want to go for it.


Well, that's true to an extent. Being tall and muscular I get that a lot "you must need a ten inch black man to satisfy you". But you forget they expand. Just because I can TAKE it, doesn't mean I NEED it. Average is fine. I prefer my cervix unskewered.
 
2012-11-12 11:58:42 AM

Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.

Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.

Untrue. I've had very sexually satisfying relationships with men who severely lacked in the penile department but could have been a violinist in another life.

And moronlessoff, you stir your shots? :P

/I keed I keed

It's certainly not unheard-of. Girl I used to know was engaged to a man with a micropenis. An actual, honest-to-God micropenis.

But sample 100 women and I'm pretty sure a majority won't be satisfied with men who have tiny penises.


Under average is different than TINY.
 
2012-11-12 11:59:13 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.


American are constantly asked "was it good for you" so they've learned to lie just to shut the men up?

Exactly how do you measure sexual satisfaction (or anything else) without a standardized yardstick.
 
2012-11-12 12:00:55 PM
Came here to see sad internet beta-males posting about how hugungous their wangs are for no real reason.

/did not leave disappointed.
 
2012-11-12 12:01:06 PM
is that including the balls?
 
2012-11-12 12:01:20 PM

kiwimoogle84: And moronlessoff, you stir your shots? :P


Nope. I mix the drink, offer it to a lady followed by a shot chaser, then put on the shot glass like a little hat for little Moron.
 
2012-11-12 12:01:40 PM

kiwimoogle84: Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.

Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.

Untrue. I've had very sexually satisfying relationships with men who severely lacked in the penile department but could have been a violinist in another life.

And moronlessoff, you stir your shots? :P

/I keed I keed

It's certainly not unheard-of. Girl I used to know was engaged to a man with a micropenis. An actual, honest-to-God micropenis.

But sample 100 women and I'm pretty sure a majority won't be satisfied with men who have tiny penises.

Under average is different than TINY.


Tiny, below-average, fun-sized, whatever. If it doesn't bruise the cervix or bang up the sides, it's likely going to get lumped into one category by those on the receiving end.
 
2012-11-12 12:03:21 PM
'This might be due at least in part to greater ability of a longer penis to stimulate the entire length of the vagina, and the cervix.

Um, what?

Know how I know that Stuart Brody is both a dude and not a real scientist?

Besides, Sue Johanson assures me that the pleasure nerves are at the entrance, not way in the back.

/hit a girl's cervix once
//neither of us enjoyed it
///not overly endowed, she was tiny and unexcited
 
2012-11-12 12:03:42 PM
assets.sbnation.com
 
2012-11-12 12:04:50 PM
I've found being rich makes up for size. Also, having the drugs. Also, fame. Men in positions of power are swamped with partners because of the proximity to power.

That's what makes for a big dickens.

Only average guys have average plumbing. Money fame and power are the real size differentials.
 
2012-11-12 12:05:22 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Link


The average American penis is actually 14" long.

Just most of it is hidden in the fat pad.
 
2012-11-12 12:06:24 PM

kiwimoogle84: I prefer my cervix unskewered.


I've heard a few women say "too long"...

It seems overly-endowed men have it just as bad as the micropenises.

Besides, evolution gives you all the information you need to show this survey is junk. Evolution would have had all penises swinging around men's knees if that's what women really preferred.
 
2012-11-12 12:06:52 PM

Clemkadidlefark: I've found being rich makes up for size. Also, having the drugs. Also, fame. Men in positions of power are swamped with partners because of the proximity to power.

That's what makes for a big dickens.

Only average guys have average plumbing. Money fame and power are the real size differentials.


First you get the money. Then you get the power...
 
2012-11-12 12:07:33 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I have a pretty small penis, but lately the warts have really helped add some extra girth and "texture".


Infected for your pleasure.
 
2012-11-12 12:09:41 PM

Joce678: kiwimoogle84: I prefer my cervix unskewered.

I've heard a few women say "too long"...

It seems overly-endowed men have it just as bad as the micropenises.

Besides, evolution gives you all the information you need to show this survey is junk. Evolution would have had all penises swinging around men's knees if that's what women really preferred.


Baseketball comes to mind...


And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.
 
2012-11-12 12:09:57 PM
i.dailymail.co.uk

What a woman having an orgasm might look like, although we're not 100% sure...
 
2012-11-12 12:12:10 PM
Woot -for above average!

I've conducted a lot of market research here, and size is a component for sure. ALL women are different. I've been able to make even the most frigid of them multi-orgasmic. Some of it is size, some of it is the motion of the ocean, some of it is positions...but once you find their groove, it's easy to keep hitting it.

/CSB
 
2012-11-12 12:12:26 PM
#1)

Her: Damn, you've got a small penis.

Him: Damn you've got a huge snatch... Damn, you've got a huge snatch...

Her: You didn't have to say it twice.

Him: I didn't.

#2)

Her: Damn, you've got a small organ.

Him: Well, nobody warned me I'd be playing a cathedral...

#3)

Her: You've got a small dick.

Him: Then it won't bother you if I roll you over and play in the mud?
 
2012-11-12 12:12:28 PM
Try having an above sized member but lacking somewhere to stick it. Doesn't really count worth a damn then.

I've always considered that it might be easier if men could do the same as women with large boobies do. I mean, well endowed girls just put them on show to draw in men. Perhaps us men who are well endowed could find a way to show off our size to draw in the ladies. Cause I'll be damned if I can figure another way to draw them in.

/Not sure if dick cleavage is possible
//Also kinda sounds horrible
 
2012-11-12 12:12:55 PM

argylez: Woot -for above average!

I've conducted a lot of market research here, and size is a component for sure. ALL women are different. I've been able to make even the most frigid of them multi-orgasmic. Some of it is size, some of it is the motion of the ocean, some of it is positions...but once you find their groove, it's easy to keep hitting it.

/CSB


How YOU doin'?
 
2012-11-12 12:13:32 PM

Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.

Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.


I'm hung like a can of Dinty Moore Beef stew.
 
2012-11-12 12:13:53 PM
Some women, get this, stick giant things in their vaginas and ruin themselves for normal sized penises. I mean really, ladies, a baby can fit in there.
 
2012-11-12 12:16:05 PM

AcneVulgaris: Martin Silenus: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it. Besides, a talented mouth and hand goes a long way.

Girth is a variable that makes or breaks this statement.

I'm hung like a can of Dinty Moore Beef stew.


Is that big or no?
 
2012-11-12 12:17:59 PM

Fark Reddit or bust: Can we stop farking around with this shiat research and find out where all the women I sleep with are hiding their clitori (clitorises? clitoriseses?) ?


"Clitorides", and seriously, it's not difficult to locate a clit.

Figuring out what she likes you to do with it once you've found it will take some trial and error.
Glorious trial and error.
 
2012-11-12 12:18:51 PM

kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.


I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.
 
2012-11-12 12:20:16 PM
So in a nut shell women who like big dick, like big dick. Also not all women like big dick. OK, thanks daily mail.

/hold it so it don't touch the nasty water.
 
2012-11-12 12:20:19 PM
Interested in photography? Snap snap, grin grin, wink wink, say no more...
Ladies, you know what to do.

www.therealestatebloggers.com
 
2012-11-12 12:21:12 PM
Size certainly does matter to those women with a Lincoln tunnelesque vajajas, who fake their orgasms anyway.
 
2012-11-12 12:22:56 PM
Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.
 
2012-11-12 12:25:26 PM
So, did they mention that the average length of a vagina is between 3 and 4 inches... and it only expands, swells and curves the cervix out of the way when the woman is sexually arroused? So.. problem solved, small boys.... just make sure to keep her underwhelmed, and the small size won't matter...
 
2012-11-12 12:26:13 PM

Princess Ryans Knickers: Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.


I, out of the strong desire to help mankind understand the functions of female anatomy, will humbly offer my services for this study. And I will donate my services. No compensation is necessary as this is obviously a matter of vital importance.
 
2012-11-12 12:27:38 PM
Yup, that's why it's here. That's not research, that's a poorly thought out pubic opinion poll.

If you want to study it, eliminate psychological effects: randomly sized picture of said junk vs actual inserted toy. Weather it physically matters vs. just in your head is important to studies. That's why we give people placebos when we test drugs.

zelachang: A better study would be to give women randomly sized dildos, tell em to get off in a room and measure how long it takes/how many orgasms but shiat I guess that costs money which no one in the psych department has.


Some of this as well.
 
2012-11-12 12:27:49 PM

Princess Ryans Knickers: Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.


Well, you CAN feel how big one is, how it fills you (or doesn't). Technique matters a lot here. Rhythmic in-out-in-out wont quite do it. Tease a bit, change angles, use your hands during, etc.

So while that's an interesting idea, I personally will have a better sexual experience with someone who cares about what he's doing, and about ME, hence why I don't do one night stands. Some women can have sex with just anyone and enjoy it. I can't.
 
2012-11-12 12:31:40 PM

kiwimoogle84: Tease a bit, change angles, use your hands during,


Well, it's just about time for my lunch break. I've got something to take care of.
 
2012-11-12 12:32:11 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.


Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.
 
2012-11-12 12:36:29 PM
FTA: If you are a man who has been cursed with a less than generous handout in the pants department ...

The pants department of my local department store doesn't provide free handouts.

So there.
 
2012-11-12 12:38:38 PM

kiwimoogle84: I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.


Is it ok if it's a double shot?
 
2012-11-12 12:39:10 PM

StaleCoffee: While I'm sure size does matter I don't know how a survey counts as standalone research.

"Do you like big dick? A) Yes B) No C) It's a good size"


Besides, most of these surveys conclude that- when it comes to sheer amount of time occupied with thinking about big dick- men have women beat in every way.

Just sayin'.
 
2012-11-12 12:39:17 PM
Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Tongue skillz
2) Girth
3) Length
4) Fingers

Plus there's always awesome combinations as well. And anyways the absolute most important things are enthusiasm and willingness to learn. I've been with guys at both ends of the spectrum and the guy who was the smallest was absolutely not willing to learn my body or have fun or do anything besides missionary sex, oral (for him only)...and that was about it (dumped less than 3 months later on his birthday because he was a jerk). On the other side, the guys who were larger absolutely made an effort to get to know my body before any sort of sexing took place so when sex finally happened it was absolutely mindblowing.

/with average guys I found it could go either way, either they didn't care or they enjoyed learning and having fun
//had a slut phase in high school (hooray untreated mental illness!)
///definitely have standards now
////also now know how my body works and to vocalize demands in a sexy manner
 
2012-11-12 12:40:19 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Is it ok if it's a double shot?


Even a highball glass would do. Provided you could fill it, I guess.

Wangs wearing hats. I wonder if there's a tumblr for that.
 
2012-11-12 12:41:00 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.


Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.
 
2012-11-12 12:41:01 PM
Let's face it, some women you can flip a coin in that thing.
 
2012-11-12 12:41:27 PM

SarahDiddle: oral (for him only)


Boo!

That's one of my favorite things in the history of things. I can't imagine anyone not wanting to reciprocate.
 
2012-11-12 12:42:21 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Is it ok if it's a double shot?

Even a highball glass would do. Provided you could fill it, I guess.

Wangs wearing hats. I wonder if there's a tumblr for that.


A sombrero and poncho would also be pretty neat. Or dressing up like a sailor...

I need to find wangs and some how be crafty enough to make tiny hats.
 
2012-11-12 12:42:26 PM

kiwimoogle84:

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.


Ohh, I have just the right one.
 
2012-11-12 12:43:15 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Is it ok if it's a double shot?

Even a highball glass would do. Provided you could fill it, I guess.

Wangs wearing hats. I wonder if there's a tumblr for that.


How about a tumbler for a hat?

But if there's no tumblr, I'm sure you could start one with what you've initiated.
 
2012-11-12 12:43:28 PM

MoronLessOff: SarahDiddle: oral (for him only)

Boo!

That's one of my favorite things in the history of things. I can't imagine anyone not wanting to reciprocate.


That's why it lasted less than 3 months. Even being young and relatively inexperienced I realized it was bullshiat.
 
2012-11-12 12:43:52 PM
Chicks nowadays rarely know many show-tunes.
 
2012-11-12 12:44:21 PM

kiwimoogle84: Wangs wearing hats. I wonder if there's a tumblr for that.


As you wish.

opionator.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-11-12 12:45:15 PM

SarahDiddle: I need to find wangs and some how be crafty enough to make tiny hats.


What if I send you measurements. I'd like a little Elmer Fudd hunting cap with the ears that fold down.

Also, do I need to draw a face on it?
 
2012-11-12 12:46:13 PM

Martin Silenus: It's certainly not unheard-of. Girl I used to know was engaged to a man with a micropenis. An actual, honest-to-God micropenis.


So we're talking your ex-fiancee, then?

/I jest.
 
2012-11-12 12:46:23 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.


Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done
 
2012-11-12 12:47:56 PM

kiwimoogle84: I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful,


You know it.

kiwimoogle84: Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask!


Mine would be named, Mucha-dor!
 
2012-11-12 12:50:04 PM

kiwimoogle84: argylez: Woot -for above average!

I've conducted a lot of market research here, and size is a component for sure. ALL women are different. I've been able to make even the most frigid of them multi-orgasmic. Some of it is size, some of it is the motion of the ocean, some of it is positions...but once you find their groove, it's easy to keep hitting it.

/CSB

How YOU doin'?


I liked his comment when Jeff Foxworthy did that joke in the 90's.
 
2012-11-12 12:50:35 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done


You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.
 
2012-11-12 12:50:53 PM

The Numbers: Martin Silenus: It's certainly not unheard-of. Girl I used to know was engaged to a man with a micropenis. An actual, honest-to-God micropenis.

So we're talking your ex-fiancee, then?

/I jest.


Considering her ex-fiance threw her around while she was pregnant, most definitely no.
 
2012-11-12 12:52:04 PM

SarahDiddle: You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.


Take your pick and send it my way.
 
2012-11-12 12:53:50 PM
I'm tired of people perpetuating the myth of the vaginal orgasm. It's still clitoral, just stimulation of the nerve bundle from the (as opposed to external) caused the orgasm.
 
2012-11-12 12:53:58 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.


I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*
 
2012-11-12 12:55:17 PM

MoronLessOff: SarahDiddle: You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

Take your pick and send it my way.


I love you.
 
2012-11-12 12:55:24 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*


They could be cowboys with a hat and a little bandanna. Oh! we can start making them look old-timey with powdered wigs!
 
2012-11-12 12:57:23 PM

MoronLessOff: SarahDiddle: You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

Take your pick and send it my way.


Awesome. I am going on the hunt for the perfect tiny hat for the first picture for our wangs with hats tumblr. It needs a catchy name though.
 
2012-11-12 12:57:53 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: SarahDiddle: You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

Take your pick and send it my way.

I love you.


SarahDiddle: They could be cowboys with a hat and a little bandanna.


Well, it looks like I'm going to the hobby store this weekend. I hope you two can wait.
 
2012-11-12 12:58:46 PM

SarahDiddle: Awesome. I am going on the hunt for the perfect tiny hat for the first picture for our wangs with hats tumblr. It needs a catchy name though.


Jimmy caps!
 
2012-11-12 12:59:11 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*

They could be cowboys with a hat and a little bandanna. Oh! we can start making them look old-timey with powdered wigs!


Every man alive hates us right now. Think we could find a three corner hat?

CELEBRATE ALL THE PENISES, BIG OR SMALL!!

If you weren't TF, I would have gifted you with it.
 
2012-11-12 01:00:36 PM
The size of your dick means little if you get her off first with your tongue.
 
2012-11-12 01:04:14 PM

kiwimoogle84: Think we could find a three corner hat?


Here you go.
 
2012-11-12 01:06:55 PM

Smeggy Smurf: The size of your dick means little if you get her off first with your tongue.


My point exactly. Besides, big or small, it's rare that I finish during the act itself unless I help out. Just the way I'm wired.
 
2012-11-12 01:07:35 PM

kiwimoogle84: argylez: Woot -for above average!

I've conducted a lot of market research here, and size is a component for sure. ALL women are different. I've been able to make even the most frigid of them multi-orgasmic. Some of it is size, some of it is the motion of the ocean, some of it is positions...but once you find their groove, it's easy to keep hitting it.

/CSB

How YOU doin'?



Would you like to conduct some research?
 
2012-11-12 01:08:40 PM

kiwimoogle84: My point exactly. Besides, big or small, it's rare that I finish during the act itself unless I help out. Just the way I'm wired.


I have no problem with this.
 
2012-11-12 01:10:29 PM

SkunkWerks: StaleCoffee: While I'm sure size does matter I don't know how a survey counts as standalone research.

"Do you like big dick? A) Yes B) No C) It's a good size"

Besides, most of these surveys conclude that- when it comes to sheer amount of time occupied with thinking about big dick- men have women beat in every way.

Just sayin'.


Makes the whole Screamers movie adaptation porn ready, thinking about it.
 
2012-11-12 01:15:50 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84:

Every man alive hates us right now. Think we could find a three corner hat?

CELEBRATE ALL THE PENISES, BIG OR SMALL!!

If you weren't TF, I would have gifted you with it.


Do you think we could expand into body paint? Like painting them to look like a pickle or pencils or something? Or we can make little penis-chaps and leather pants and have a whole line of penis clothes.

My god, it could be a coffee table book!
 
2012-11-12 01:16:03 PM
Kiwi, Sarah, one more for you.
 
2012-11-12 01:18:01 PM

MoronLessOff: SarahDiddle: Awesome. I am going on the hunt for the perfect tiny hat for the first picture for our wangs with hats tumblr. It needs a catchy name though.

Jimmy caps!


Oh lord. I don't think I can think of a better name than that.

/if you get a top hat be sure to draw a monocle too
 
2012-11-12 01:18:38 PM
After reviewing the WIE received during last week's cockalanche, I feel I am qualified to make the call that many Farkers are actually quite generously endowed. Or maybe the unfortunate ones just don't WIE. That's sad. I like them all...
 
2012-11-12 01:19:56 PM

poison_amy: After reviewing the WIE received during last week's cockalanche, I feel I am qualified to make the call that many Farkers are actually quite generously endowed. Or maybe the unfortunate ones just don't WIE. That's sad. I like them all...


Cockalanche is a good word yet a scary mental image.
 
2012-11-12 01:20:42 PM
Women are extremely 'flexible' down there...my last GF (real not imaginary) was able to be fisted.
 
2012-11-12 01:22:16 PM

poison_amy: After reviewing the WIE received during last week's cockalanche, I feel I am qualified to make the call that many Farkers are actually quite generously endowed. Or maybe the unfortunate ones just don't WIE. That's sad. I like them all...


I can't see why someone would want to showcase a (perceivably) small penis, unless some delusion was involved.

/penis
 
2012-11-12 01:22:43 PM

SarahDiddle: poison_amy: After reviewing the WIE received during last week's cockalanche, I feel I am qualified to make the call that many Farkers are actually quite generously endowed. Or maybe the unfortunate ones just don't WIE. That's sad. I like them all...

Cockalanche is a good word yet a scary mental image.


Do not say it three times. You have been warned.
 
2012-11-12 01:24:10 PM

SarahDiddle: Cockalanche is a good word yet a scary mental image.


Cocknado.

Penisonsoon.

Tallywhackercaine.

Dickquake.


You're welcome.
 
2012-11-12 01:27:18 PM
...is this what TF is like all the time?

/simultaneously frightened and intrigued.
 
2012-11-12 01:28:36 PM

SarahDiddle: Cockalanche is a good word yet a scary mental image.


It only takes 3 little letters to get it started.

SarahDiddle: /if you get a top hat be sure to draw a monocle too


Sure, but you'll have to be patient.
 
2012-11-12 01:29:02 PM

nmemkha: Martin Silenus: nmemkha: Why is their such obsession over penis size, but no one gives a hoot about vagina tightness?

I've encountered some bigger than my first apartment.

Which, incidentally, was also a vagina.

Yeah I had such an awesome man cave ... even had a pool table! You had to hold the sticks are weird angles, but it worked.


do you know that trick about keeping creases out of your pants too?
i2.ytimg.com
 
2012-11-12 01:29:29 PM

poison_amy: After reviewing the WIE received during last week's cockalanche, I feel I am qualified to make the call that many Farkers are actually quite generously endowed. Or maybe the unfortunate ones just don't WIE. That's sad. I like them all...


You got a cockalanche? I WANT ONE!

And TF is fun :) we really could branch out here. I am a skilled painter, I could make a felt sunflower top and paint vines up the front of it. Dye the pubes green for grass. WE'RE CREATIVE!

/bored at the moment
 
2012-11-12 01:31:06 PM

Bondith: 'This might be due at least in part to greater ability of a longer penis to stimulate the entire length of the vagina, and the cervix.

Um, what?

Know how I know that Stuart Brody is both a dude and not a real scientist?

Besides, Sue Johanson assures me that the pleasure nerves are at the entrance, not way in the back.

/hit a girl's cervix once
//neither of us enjoyed it
///not overly endowed, she was tiny and unexcited


There are certain positions where this becomes a practical problem, even when missionary gives enough buffer to avoid it. I think I've only hit once via missionary, but that was, er, one of the most enthusiastic and exhausting nights ever, so not a good sample. Probably at least a dozen times when we lined up in other ways.

Joce678: No. What they missed is that women come in different, um, "capacities".

It's the last great taboo of human sexuality: Some women need 12 inches length and the thickness of a coke can to even reach both sides at the same time.

So remember... whenever a woman says, "I prefer big ones", she's really saying she has a huge, cavernous, baby bucket down there. Remember to strap a plank across your ass if you decide you want to go for it.


This is the greatest post on Fark this morning.

/Strap the latex glove on too.
 
2012-11-12 01:31:15 PM

ferretman: Women are extremely 'flexible' down there...my last GF (real not imaginary) was able to be fisted.


Yeah um, I'm flexible and can take a pounding, but my bones don't work that way. That would hurt me. And you might get donkey punched in the process.

If you break your toy, you can't play with it anymore.
 
2012-11-12 01:33:14 PM

ferretman: Women are extremely 'flexible' down there...my last GF (real not imaginary) was able to be fisted.


I think my vagina screamed in horror.
 
2012-11-12 01:36:52 PM

kiwimoogle84: ferretman: Women are extremely 'flexible' down there...my last GF (real not imaginary) was able to be fisted.

Yeah um, I'm flexible and can take a pounding, but my bones don't work that way. That would hurt me. And you might get donkey punched in the process.

If you break your toy, you can't play with it anymore.


I don't know why, but these made me spit my coffee out.
 
2012-11-12 01:38:57 PM

valar_morghulis: kiwimoogle84: ferretman: Women are extremely 'flexible' down there...my last GF (real not imaginary) was able to be fisted.

Yeah um, I'm flexible and can take a pounding, but my bones don't work that way. That would hurt me. And you might get donkey punched in the process.

If you break your toy, you can't play with it anymore.

I don't know why, but these made me spit my coffee out.


I'll be here all week *bows* that was said to me once after calling me his delicious sex toy, and he treats me well because if you break your toy etc etc. I liked the logic.
 
2012-11-12 01:40:34 PM

kiwimoogle84: but my bones don't work that way


Assuming I'm understanding who's pitching and who's catching here, I'm curious to know how your bones can make enough room for a baby, but not a fist.

i.qkme.me

I once knew a machinist who swore up and down he could make an already-too-big hole smaller by running a smaller drill through it. I'm betting it has something to do with that.

kiwimoogle84: And you might get donkey punched in the process.


Also curious how you donkey-punch someone backwards.
 
2012-11-12 01:40:59 PM

SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Tongue skillz
2) Girth
3) Length
4) Fingers


Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.
 
2012-11-12 01:45:48 PM

valar_morghulis: poison_amy: After reviewing the WIE received during last week's cockalanche, I feel I am qualified to make the call that many Farkers are actually quite generously endowed. Or maybe the unfortunate ones just don't WIE. That's sad. I like them all...

I can't see why someone would want to showcase a (perceivably) small penis, unless some delusion was involved.

/penis


Because of the sweet, sweet reciprocity.
 
2012-11-12 01:46:04 PM
Women have orgasms? I had no idea.

/my schwanz would look awesome in a hat
//Indiana Jones fedora, please
 
2012-11-12 01:46:11 PM

kiwimoogle84: ferretman: Women are extremely 'flexible' down there...my last GF (real not imaginary) was able to be fisted.

Yeah um, I'm flexible and can take a pounding, but my bones don't work that way. That would hurt me. And you might get donkey punched in the process.

If you break your toy, you can't play with it anymore.


Early on, I once went from one finger up to all five immediately; within 20 seconds she'd called it off and started chewing me out for ruining it, especially since her ex had a bad habit of trying that all the time. After that, I learned to use one and the tongue better instead of the J-J-J-JAM IT IN! route. (Though more are requested on big night performances.)
 
2012-11-12 01:47:22 PM

valar_morghulis: I can't see why someone would want to showcase a (perceivably) small penis, unless some delusion was involved.

/penis


Such a double standard here- I'm down with tiny boobies. Why can't I get some reciprocity for my 4'' wonder?
 
2012-11-12 01:48:15 PM

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: but my bones don't work that way

Assuming I'm understanding who's pitching and who's catching here, I'm curious to know how your bones can make enough room for a baby, but not a fist.



I once knew a machinist who swore up and down he could make an already-too-big hole smaller by running a smaller drill through it. I'm betting it has something to do with that.

kiwimoogle84: And you might get donkey punched in the process.

Also curious how you donkey-punch someone backwards.


Because having a baby effing hurts like hell, as would a fist. It rearranges to allow for the baby to pass through, but it's not pleasant. I've never had kids, and don't plan to. I'm very tight due to years of catching softball and kegels, and I don't want a hand all up in that, ya?

Regular punching would likely be what I meant, but donkey punch sounded funnier.
 
2012-11-12 01:51:36 PM

calm like a bomb: valar_morghulis: I can't see why someone would want to showcase a (perceivably) small penis, unless some delusion was involved.

/penis

Such a double standard here- I'm down with tiny boobies. Why can't I get some reciprocity for my 4'' wonder?


I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal
 
2012-11-12 01:52:20 PM

poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Tongue skillz
2) Girth
3) Length
4) Fingers

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.


I'm just not a big fan of fingers, they've never done it for me even during oral. It's too distracting in a bad way.
 
2012-11-12 01:53:13 PM

poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal


You jib, I likes the cut of it. Shows off teh cleavage nicely.
 
2012-11-12 01:54:25 PM

kiwimoogle84: It rearranges to allow for the baby to pass through


Bones don't rearrange though. Particularly the pelvis, which you'd pretty much have to break to rearrange.

Muscles do rearrange though. They're pliable. Moreover, those muscles- believe it or not- are voluntary. We're taught to keep 'em tight- boys and girls. Hard to unlearn habits. Takes practice. A lot of practice

Not suggesting that you try this, mind you. Not even suggesting it would be your cup of tea. I am however suggesting your understanding of anatomy there needs a bit of work. It's not your bones that are the issue in this case.

/thehandthatrockswifey'scervix
 
2012-11-12 01:54:34 PM

SarahDiddle: poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Tongue skillz
2) Girth
3) Length
4) Fingers

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.

I'm just not a big fan of fingers, they've never done it for me even during oral. It's too distracting in a bad way.


I'll take the fingers then. They work for me. Sweet sweet nimble fingers.

And what are these deals we're cutting, Calm and Amy? I want in!
 
2012-11-12 01:57:08 PM

calm like a bomb: valar_morghulis: I can't see why someone would want to showcase a (perceivably) small penis, unless some delusion was involved.

/penis

Such a double standard here- I'm down with tiny boobies. Why can't I get some reciprocity for my 4'' wonder?


I enjoy a nice A / B cup as well. But yes, dudes with small penises can't get a break. It's a hard world for them. A hard, hard world.

Hard.
 
2012-11-12 01:57:18 PM

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: It rearranges to allow for the baby to pass through

Bones don't rearrange though. Particularly the pelvis, which you'd pretty much have to break to rearrange.

Muscles do rearrange though. They're pliable. Moreover, those muscles- believe it or not- are voluntary. We're taught to keep 'em tight- boys and girls. Hard to unlearn habits. Takes practice. A lot of practice

Not suggesting that you try this, mind you. Not even suggesting it would be your cup of tea. I am however suggesting your understanding of anatomy there needs a bit of work. It's not your bones that are the issue in this case.

/thehandthatrockswifey'scervix


Ok, I was making a generalized statement. I'm fluent in anatomy. By REARRANGE I mostly meant yeah, pelvic bones have to be forced to expand by way of the muscles and ligaments.

I just say bones because I know from trying things out on myself, that my pelvis and pubic bones just don't want to allow for a hand. I can feel them and they ain't widening.
 
2012-11-12 01:57:18 PM

kiwimoogle84: I'm very tight due to years of catching softball and kegels


There's a joke in there about softballs, but I'm ashamed to make it.

Time for another lunch break.
 
2012-11-12 01:57:45 PM

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: It rearranges to allow for the baby to pass through

Bones don't rearrange though. Particularly the pelvis, which you'd pretty much have to break to rearrange.


Well, to be all sciency about it, they kind of do. The ligaments in the pubic and sacroiliac sympheses relax and allow the canal to be widened.

/lesson over
//back to finding tiny hats
 
2012-11-12 01:58:01 PM

poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Money
2) Money
3) Money
4) Money

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.


Fixed for both of you
 
2012-11-12 01:59:51 PM

kiwimoogle84: my pelvis and pubic bones just don't want to allow for a hand.


Everyone's built a bit different.

Honestly my best sex organ weighs about three pounds and is decidedly north of my belt.
 
2012-11-12 02:00:20 PM
Totally bookmarking this thread mainly for the Farkettes.
 
2012-11-12 02:00:49 PM

kiwimoogle84: I'll take the fingers then. They work for me. Sweet sweet nimble fingers.


I've been trying to teach myself guitar, but I don't have calluses yet. Does that work?

kiwimoogle84: And what are these deals we're cutting, Calm and Amy? I want in!


Also, yes, let's all make deals.
 
2012-11-12 02:00:58 PM

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: my pelvis and pubic bones just don't want to allow for a hand.

Everyone's built a bit different.

Honestly my best sex organ weighs about three pounds and is decidedly north of my belt.


Giant nipples?
 
2012-11-12 02:01:31 PM

poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal


BIE?
 
2012-11-12 02:03:59 PM

kiwimoogle84: Wangs wearing hats. I wonder if there's a tumblr for that.


www.carlspackler.com

"No offense!"
 
2012-11-12 02:05:17 PM

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: my pelvis and pubic bones just don't want to allow for a hand.

Everyone's built a bit different.

Honestly my best sex organ weighs about three pounds and is decidedly north of my belt.


Prominent nose?
 
2012-11-12 02:06:54 PM

SarahDiddle: SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: my pelvis and pubic bones just don't want to allow for a hand.

Everyone's built a bit different.

Honestly my best sex organ weighs about three pounds and is decidedly north of my belt.

Prominent nose?


www.top10films.co.uk
 
2012-11-12 02:08:23 PM

SarahDiddle: Prominent nose?


popreflection.files.wordpress.com

Lord Byron's was 5 pounds.

Poets get all the nookie.
 
2012-11-12 02:08:26 PM
kiwimoogle84: I'm very tight due to years of catching softball and kegels,

How you doing?
 
2012-11-12 02:09:57 PM

kiwimoogle84: I'm very tight due to years of catching softball and kegels,


Yes, please.
 
2012-11-12 02:10:36 PM

valar_morghulis: poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Money
2) Money
3) Money
4) Money

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.

Fixed for both of you


Don't be ridiculous. Neither Sarah nor I are shallow twunts. I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.
 
2012-11-12 02:11:47 PM

kiwimoogle84: Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.


Why would you want to sleep with a straw man anyway? Sounds itchy.
 
2012-11-12 02:14:58 PM

kiwimoogle84: valar_morghulis: poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Money
2) Money
3) Money
4) Money

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.

Fixed for both of you

Don't be ridiculous. Neither Sarah nor I are shallow twunts. I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.


You ladies must live North of Florida.
 
2012-11-12 02:15:30 PM

kiwimoogle84: valar_morghulis: poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Money
2) Money
3) Money
4) Money

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.

Fixed for both of you

Don't be ridiculous. Neither Sarah nor I are shallow twunts. I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.


So uh... just to confirm... Street Fighter skills are somewhere on your list, right?
 
2012-11-12 02:15:57 PM

kiwimoogle84: sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills.


Check, check, check and check. I even have only a little money. BINGO!
 
2012-11-12 02:16:26 PM

argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?


Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today
 
2012-11-12 02:17:21 PM

kiwimoogle84: mad Street Fighter skills


I excel at the Blow-Me Hand Slap. And to a lesser extent, Crotch-Copter Kung-Fu.
 
2012-11-12 02:17:30 PM

reillan: kiwimoogle84: valar_morghulis: poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Money
2) Money
3) Money
4) Money

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.

Fixed for both of you

Don't be ridiculous. Neither Sarah nor I are shallow twunts. I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.

So uh... just to confirm... Street Fighter skills are somewhere on your list, right?


I'll Dhalsim all your arses into the ground. Video game skills are necessary. Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.
 
2012-11-12 02:19:29 PM

poison_amy: I'm feeling generous and AWish today


You HAVE to know you're going to get swarmed on that. (yeah, I'm curious . . . )

Is this a return wave from the cockalanche?
 
2012-11-12 02:20:11 PM

kiwimoogle84: I'll Dhalsim all your arses into the ground. Video game skills are necessary. Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.


I have one of these:
t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-12 02:21:12 PM

MoronLessOff: I have one of these:


It's way smaller than a fist!
 
2012-11-12 02:22:46 PM

poison_amy: Because of the sweet, sweet reciprocity.


poison_amy: I'm feeling generous and AWish today


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-11-12 02:22:47 PM

poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


EIP, kthx
 
2012-11-12 02:23:29 PM
What's the old Rodney Dangerfield joke: "Last night my wife told me to give her nine inches and make it hurt. So I farked her twice and hit her in the head with a hammer."
 
2012-11-12 02:26:43 PM
i thought vaginal orgasms wern't real

anyway, luckily i'm built like a redwood tree, long and wide, amirite
 
2012-11-12 02:26:47 PM

poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


Since you're feeling generous, my E is in my P as well.
 
2012-11-12 02:28:34 PM

E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: anyway, luckily i'm built like a redwood tree, long and wide, amirite


Don't forget hundreds of years old.
 
2012-11-12 02:29:17 PM

SarahDiddle: /if you get a top hat be sure to draw a monocle too


Just a heads up, you E is not in your P.


But to anyone who is interested, mine is.
 
2012-11-12 02:30:03 PM

poison_amy: Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


I'm a lucky farker!
 
2012-11-12 02:30:32 PM
Just remember, ladies: it may look small at first, but it holds a lot of blood!
 
2012-11-12 02:30:42 PM

SkunkWerks: E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: anyway, luckily i'm built like a redwood tree, long and wide, amirite

Don't forget hundreds of years old.


And filled with wildlife.
 
2012-11-12 02:30:50 PM

SkunkWerks: E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: anyway, luckily i'm built like a redwood tree, long and wide, amirite

Don't forget hundreds of years old.


And has leaves at the top. That's gotta feel kinda weird for those on the receiving end.
 
2012-11-12 02:31:39 PM

kiwimoogle84: reillan: kiwimoogle84: valar_morghulis: poot_rootbeer: SarahDiddle: Order of importance (for me anyways)

1) Money
2) Money
3) Money
4) Money

Should move #4 up, since fingers can be used as supplemental girth.

Fixed for both of you

Don't be ridiculous. Neither Sarah nor I are shallow twunts. I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.

So uh... just to confirm... Street Fighter skills are somewhere on your list, right?

I'll Dhalsim all your arses into the ground. Video game skills are necessary. Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.


Step off, playa. Guile all the way for this family man.
 
2012-11-12 02:32:22 PM

MoronLessOff: SkunkWerks: E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: anyway, luckily i'm built like a redwood tree, long and wide, amirite

Don't forget hundreds of years old.

And filled with wildlife.


George Lucas called. Those are Ewoks.
 
2012-11-12 02:33:38 PM

calm like a bomb: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

Since you're feeling generous, my E is in my P as well.


I don't work that hard. You have to go to the trouble of getting my email address and then you send me something... Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!
 
2012-11-12 02:33:56 PM

SkunkWerks: MoronLessOff: SkunkWerks: E_Henry_Thripshaws_Disease: anyway, luckily i'm built like a redwood tree, long and wide, amirite

Don't forget hundreds of years old.

And filled with wildlife.

George Lucas called. Those are Ewoks.


I hereby declare that genital infestations shall from now on be referred to as "A case of the Ewoks".
 
2012-11-12 02:36:35 PM

poison_amy: Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!


And squishy, it one way or another.
 
2012-11-12 02:39:00 PM

MoronLessOff: poison_amy: Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!

And squishy, itn one way or another.


dammit
 
2012-11-12 02:41:05 PM

Martin Silenus: nmemkha: Why is their such obsession over penis size, but no one gives a hoot about vagina tightness?

I've encountered some bigger than my first apartment.

Which, incidentally, was also a vagina.


Technically, the vagina was only the foyer.
 
2012-11-12 02:44:14 PM

MoronLessOff: MoronLessOff: poison_amy: Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!

And squishy, itn one way or another.

dammit


I would like to think I do not cause men to become squishy.
 
2012-11-12 02:50:07 PM

poison_amy: I don't work that hard. You have to go to the trouble of getting my email address and then you send me something... Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!


Fair enough. Won't be able to for a few hours.
 
2012-11-12 02:50:23 PM

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: MoronLessOff: poison_amy: Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!

And squishy, itn one way or another.

dammit

I would like to think I do not cause men to become squishy.


Maybe at the end? Made sense to me :)
 
2012-11-12 02:50:44 PM
Is this where we pretend we never see boobies and post bie?

Bie?
 
2012-11-12 02:54:04 PM

kiwimoogle84: Maybe at the end? Made sense to me :)


You get me.
 
2012-11-12 02:54:10 PM
I'll probably get in trouble for this but, it's too funny to pass up.

www.demotivationalposters.org
 
2012-11-12 02:55:24 PM

ShobuZukuri: I'll probably get in trouble for this but, it's too funny to pass up.

[www.demotivationalposters.org image 640x589]


rocketdock.com
 
2012-11-12 02:55:52 PM

ShobuZukuri: I'll probably get in trouble for this but, it's too funny to pass up.


HAAAA!!!! I love it! Mine is less horse teeth and more flushed in the cheeks. But it applies.
 
2012-11-12 02:58:18 PM

kiwimoogle84: Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.


See, you need to be above average size to do that.
 
2012-11-12 02:59:48 PM

StoPPeRmobile: kiwimoogle84: Also, ability to make me snort various fluids out my nose laughing. Biggest turn on EVER.

See, you need to be above average size to do that.


HA! And OW.
 
2012-11-12 03:00:40 PM

StoPPeRmobile: See, you need to be above average size to do that.


And dress at 90 degree angles.
 
2012-11-12 03:06:54 PM

SarahDiddle: I think my vagina screamed in horror.


Says the woman who's into interrobangs...
 
2012-11-12 03:08:55 PM

HAMMERTOE: into interrobangs


I'm more a Percontation man myself.
 
2012-11-12 03:09:59 PM
I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.
 
2012-11-12 03:11:46 PM

kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.


Whoa there missy! Being a douche is primarily an oral skill.
 
2012-11-12 03:14:33 PM

kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.


I'm not going to brag on my oral skills, nor say that I'm terrible at it. I'll just say that I love to make my lady happy... and when she's happy... I'm well taken care of.
 
2012-11-12 03:18:50 PM

kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.


Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.
 
2012-11-12 03:21:26 PM

poison_amy: Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


What!? That's half the fun :)
 
2012-11-12 03:22:25 PM

poison_amy: kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.

Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


I love to go down, but I'm not sure how it would work with the new beard.
 
2012-11-12 03:24:13 PM

MoronLessOff: I love to go down, but I'm not sure how it would work with the new beard.


She'll be fine. You, OTOH, should stop deluding yourself.

/nttawwt
 
2012-11-12 03:24:26 PM

poison_amy: kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.

Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


Bah. I can hold my breath for 5 minutes...
 
2012-11-12 03:24:54 PM

poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


I also would very much appreciate some of that, please!
/EIP
 
2012-11-12 03:25:42 PM
E is in P, just in case anyone has a need for it.
 
2012-11-12 03:27:14 PM

tamsnod27: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

I also would very much appreciate some of that, please!
/EIP


Scroll up for instructions on how to receive
 
2012-11-12 03:29:58 PM

calm like a bomb: You, OTOH, should stop deluding yourself.


Wat?
 
2012-11-12 03:31:41 PM

MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: You, OTOH, should stop deluding yourself.

Wat?


I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.
 
2012-11-12 03:33:12 PM

poison_amy: kxs401: I assume every man who brags about his oral skills has a tiny dick.

And/or is a douche.

Most of the guys I would describe as a douche are the guys who think they are too pretty to get their faces wet.


THIS! If you want my mouth, you'd better give me yours. What is wrong with some men? *smh*

And holding your breath ain't a big deal, boys. If you know what you're doing, breathing normally shouldn't be an issue. I don't need you to bury your chin in there or anything.
 
2012-11-12 03:33:28 PM
My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.
 
2012-11-12 03:34:59 PM

swangoatman: My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.


She won't even BJ you? That's pretty rough. I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage. I'm sorry.

/want BIE?
//eip
 
2012-11-12 03:37:34 PM

swangoatman: My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.


Hie thee hence to a doc. There are solutions.
 
2012-11-12 03:38:52 PM

calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.


Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip


You're a hero to many.
 
2012-11-12 03:40:34 PM

MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.


I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.
 
2012-11-12 03:42:01 PM

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.

I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.


Hey, I have sympathy. Many friends in sexless relationships. *shrug*
 
2012-11-12 03:43:15 PM

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.

I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.


She knows my story. Watch this-
BIE? EIP!

That right there is just a shameless request and crossed fingers.
 
2012-11-12 03:44:29 PM

MoronLessOff: You're a hero to many


I certainly know how she could be mine, but I don't have a good (or sad) story to share. Oh well.
 
2012-11-12 03:45:14 PM
kiwimoogle84: ...

I don't care about money. Money doesn't buy a sense of humor, skills in bed, being kind and thoughtful, or mad Street Fighter skills. Why would I want a guy who only wants to throw a black AmEx at me and then dump me for having a brain? No thanks.


It's like catching a glimpse of a unicorn from the corner of your eye...
 
2012-11-12 03:47:02 PM
What the hell

EIP
 
2012-11-12 03:49:26 PM

SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: but my bones don't work that way

Assuming I'm understanding who's pitching and who's catching here, I'm curious to know how your bones can make enough room for a baby, but not a fist.
[snip]


One of the things that happens to women when they are pregnant is that the ligaments that hold their pelvises together loosen so that there is room for a baby. Sometimes it goes wrong, things loosen up that the women have trouble walking, sometimes things go wrong and the baby won't fit through. It's a good thing we have modern medicine now.
 
2012-11-12 03:50:36 PM

FSTFKL: SkunkWerks: kiwimoogle84: but my bones don't work that way

Assuming I'm understanding who's pitching and who's catching here, I'm curious to know how your bones can make enough room for a baby, but not a fist.
[snip]

One of the things that happens to women when they are pregnant is that the ligaments that hold their pelvises together loosen so that there is room for a baby. Sometimes it goes wrong, things loosen up that the women have trouble walking, sometimes things go wrong and the baby won't fit through. It's a good thing we have modern medicine now.


Pffft, no pregnancy has resulted in death for the mother in modern history, because science.
 
2MS
2012-11-12 03:50:50 PM

poison_amy: swangoatman: My wife went through menopause three years ago and we have not ANY sex at all since then. I abhor the thought of leaving her or having an affair. as other than the sex she is a wonderful supportive mate and mother. I masturbate when i can to ease off a little ,but it is not the same as being inside a woman. SO yes that is why I am a biatch boy on here and being on drugs for my depression robs me of most "warm" sensations that should just happen several; times each day. SO just think you could be stuck like me. Oh and no I am not a fat ugly loser.

Hie thee hence to a doc. There are solutions.


But not all solution work. Sometimes, you just have to call it a day.
 
2012-11-12 03:52:01 PM

poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today


Well...hello there....BIE

/EIP
 
2012-11-12 03:52:08 PM

poison_amy: MoronLessOff: calm like a bomb: I guess the joke wasn't as obvious as I thought.

Doy. I gotcha.

kiwimoogle84: /want BIE?
//eip

You're a hero to many.

I'm guessing we'll hear that story a lot now, since it got a BIE offer so handily.


You two have made this thread quite entertaining.
 
2012-11-12 03:54:22 PM
oh, and EiP... just in case someone feels like making my work day a lot better :)

/fingers crossed
 
2012-11-12 03:56:04 PM
I just know this thread has helped with my case of the Mondays... Thanks you guys!
 
2012-11-12 04:07:01 PM

ferretman: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

Well...hello there....BIE

/EIP


The BIE is there, and it's pretty good, but you have to email ME first!
 
2012-11-12 04:11:54 PM
/You know who.....
 
2012-11-12 04:12:38 PM

ferretman: This does not matter for we all know the truth...THE FEMALE ORGASM IS A MYTH!


Married, eh?
 
2012-11-12 04:13:07 PM
assets0.ordienetworks.com

/Preview is your friend...
 
2012-11-12 04:13:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage.


Truer words have never been spoken, but, alas, here I am. Also not a fat ugly loser...just not hitting it off with the wife anymore, which is a shame because she is still the most physically attractive woman I've ever been with, and a fantastic mother.

However, I will never abandon my daughter. I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.
 
2012-11-12 04:13:56 PM
My wife, I mean.
 
2012-11-12 04:14:31 PM

H31N0US: I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.


I'm pretty sure that's the worst possible way to deal with that situation.
 
2012-11-12 04:17:12 PM

H31N0US: kiwimoogle84: I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage.

Truer words have never been spoken, but, alas, here I am. Also not a fat ugly loser...just not hitting it off with the wife anymore, which is a shame because she is still the most physically attractive woman I've ever been with, and a fantastic mother.

However, I will never abandon my daughter. I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.


EIP. Tell me about it. I've talked with other friends and I think I've helped them. Always an ear for a Fark friend. *hugs*
 
2012-11-12 04:19:27 PM
Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.
 
2012-11-12 04:21:51 PM

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


Did you fap?
 
2012-11-12 04:24:52 PM

H31N0US: kiwimoogle84: I understand medical stuff but when you've been reduced to being a roommate, that's not a marriage.

Truer words have never been spoken, but, alas, here I am. Also not a fat ugly loser...just not hitting it off with the wife anymore, which is a shame because she is still the most physically attractive woman I've ever been with, and a fantastic mother.

However, I will never abandon my daughter. I figure eventually she'll serve me and then I'll have to take it from there.


Man, these stories are sad... I wish you guys the best. Hopefully you find a way to spark up the passion again.
 
2012-11-12 04:25:54 PM

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


go on...
 
2012-11-12 04:26:08 PM

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


Hawt.
 
2012-11-12 04:28:31 PM

poison_amy: Whoa. I got boobies in MY email. That's a first.


I was gonna send you my moobs later, but now that's ruined......
 
2012-11-12 04:35:15 PM

SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.


This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.
 
2012-11-12 04:39:25 PM

MoronLessOff: I'm pretty sure that's the worst possible way to deal with that situation.


Last thing I want is to be a divorced Dad seeing my kid call some other dude "Dad". She's only 2 years old. Maybe that's selfish. Most of the time my wife and I get on alright...if it gets bad enough that all my daughter sees is acrimony and hostility then I will become a bit more proactive.

kiwimoogle84: EIP. Tell me about it. I've talked with other friends and I think I've helped them. Always an ear for a Fark friend. *hugs*


I think it's a case of being together for a very long time (since the late 1990's) and getting tired of each other's idiosyncrasies. She is stubborn and never admits she is wrong or says she is sorry. I am hot headed and have a short fuse for irrational behavior. Add to that the strains of being parents, each of us having careers, and the natural proclivity for a woman's sex drive to diminish as a long term relationship ages, and there is little sexytime and the little bit is kind of lame. Funny thing is she almost always orgasms when we do and she's not the type to fake it (plus there are ways to tell)

I don't think my situation is unique at all. Lots of married people go through this. There is a reason pron is such an industry, and hookers make money.
 
2012-11-12 04:39:40 PM

catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.


I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis
 
2012-11-12 04:39:43 PM

SarahDiddle: My god, it could be a coffee table book!


You could always see if these guys would be willing to pose for the cover: Puppetry of the Penis

Link
 
2012-11-12 04:40:07 PM
Oh, what the Hell...

BIE?

EIP...
 
2012-11-12 04:41:34 PM

catmacgregor: This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.


Shake it more than twice and you're playing with it!
 
2012-11-12 04:42:32 PM

H31N0US: I don't think my situation is unique at all. Lots of married people go through this.


I know that feel, bro.
 
2012-11-12 04:44:44 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.


Id volunteer.
 
2012-11-12 04:48:56 PM
i haz a happy :)
 
2012-11-12 04:49:40 PM

kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis


I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?
 
2MS
2012-11-12 04:50:21 PM
I just want to thanks a couple of folks. It's always nice to make new friends.
 
2012-11-12 04:50:47 PM
I need some BIE too!
EIP

will happily reciprocate with wie, it has multiple times by different partners been described as perfect.
 
2012-11-12 04:51:55 PM

kiwimoogle84: Princess Ryans Knickers: Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.

Well, you CAN feel how big one is, how it fills you (or doesn't). Technique matters a lot here. Rhythmic in-out-in-out wont quite do it. Tease a bit, change angles, use your hands during, etc.

So while that's an interesting idea, I personally will have a better sexual experience with someone who cares about what he's doing, and about ME, hence why I don't do one night stands. Some women can have sex with just anyone and enjoy it. I can't.


They've run tests like this before when it comes to food tasting. Wine tasters swearing up and down they can "tell the difference" between the various brands of wines. The blind taste tests proved them wrong. Sex, like so much else, is all in your head. You are having a placebo effect.
 
2012-11-12 04:53:48 PM

Princess Ryans Knickers: kiwimoogle84: Princess Ryans Knickers: Bad "study" is bad. Instead of a survey, why not do a real scientific study with the women hooked up to machines to monitor their brains while experiencing sex with unknown (to them) penis sizes? I will make a bet that unless it's a micro-penis that they wouldn't be able to tell if they don't know.

Well, you CAN feel how big one is, how it fills you (or doesn't). Technique matters a lot here. Rhythmic in-out-in-out wont quite do it. Tease a bit, change angles, use your hands during, etc.

So while that's an interesting idea, I personally will have a better sexual experience with someone who cares about what he's doing, and about ME, hence why I don't do one night stands. Some women can have sex with just anyone and enjoy it. I can't.

They've run tests like this before when it comes to food tasting. Wine tasters swearing up and down they can "tell the difference" between the various brands of wines. The blind taste tests proved them wrong. Sex, like so much else, is all in your head. You are having a placebo effect.


*shrug* if that's what you think. You've never been a woman, I take it.

Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.
 
2012-11-12 04:54:22 PM
Many thanks ladies.
 
2012-11-12 04:54:28 PM

Meatschool: catmacgregor: This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

Shake it more than twice and you're playing with it!


So if I let go after shaking twice, I'm not obligated to go any further? Best easy out card ever.
 
2012-11-12 04:55:04 PM

Space Station Wagon: I need some BIE too!
EIP

will happily reciprocate with wie, it has multiple times by different partners been described as perfect.


"perfect" is another cruel code for saying it's kinda small. Send it though, I don't discriminate!
 
2012-11-12 04:58:08 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis

I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?


I just thought it was a funny play on words.

Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?
 
2012-11-12 05:00:23 PM

kiwimoogle84: Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?


For some reason, that made ME blush...
 
2MS
2012-11-12 05:01:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis

I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?

I just thought it was a funny play on words.

Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?


That made me tremble a little...
 
2012-11-12 05:02:50 PM

kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.


*joke about taste test*
 
2012-11-12 05:04:53 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*


Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.
 
2012-11-12 05:08:06 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*


A whale drawn on it... a Sperm Whale, no doubt
 
2012-11-12 05:09:04 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.


I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.
 
2012-11-12 05:11:52 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.


I've been told cranberry juice does the same. Perhaps someone would like to help verify this with me?

*wink*
 
2012-11-12 05:11:53 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.


Of course women who don't swallow would say such a thing. But it's usually a lot, like four glasses over two days. Then the end of the second day...
 
2012-11-12 05:13:01 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.


I've heard about it... never tried the pineapple juice thing though. May have to stop at the store on the way home tonight.
 
2012-11-12 05:13:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...


So...what are you doing Wednesday evening?
 
2012-11-12 05:13:19 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

I've been told that's a myth by a few lady friends. They must be being prissy.

Of course women who don't swallow would say such a thing. But it's usually a lot, like four glasses over two days. Then the end of the second day...


Asparagus is right out.
 
2012-11-12 05:13:20 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: SkunkWerks:

Dickquake.

This just made me visualize a man shaking his penis after peeing.

I've had a dick make me quake before.

/with his penis

I am confused. Could you please elabora..... Wait... *turns on some sexy jazz*.... Ok, elaborate?

I just thought it was a funny play on words.

Though I DO shake and tremble, and I get very flushed.

/happy?


I am generally pleased with today's events, yes. :]
 
2012-11-12 05:13:51 PM

kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...


he fixes the cable?
 
2012-11-12 05:14:48 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?


More like laying down the cable, amiright?
 
2012-11-12 05:15:36 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?


No silly, he cleans the gutters.
 
2012-11-12 05:18:24 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?

No silly, he cleans the gutters.


While she cleans the pipes of course.
 
2012-11-12 05:18:51 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

he fixes the cable?


If you weren't already going on the friends list, you would for that.

/that's my robe, man
 
2012-11-12 05:19:56 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Then the end of the second day...

So...what are you doing Wednesday evening?


Measuring doses of painkillers for a family member who just had surgery? It's why I'm here after all. But I'm with you in spirit.

You guys are funny :)
 
2012-11-12 05:20:23 PM

kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.


Yes, but which was a larger bottle?
 
2012-11-12 05:21:55 PM

poot_rootbeer: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

Yes, but which was a larger bottle?


I just spit Nutella and pretzels out all over my coffee table. You win the internets today, my friend.
 
2012-11-12 05:22:24 PM

kiwimoogle84: Measuring doses of painkillers for a family member who just had surgery?


One for them, one for me, one for them, two for me...
 
2012-11-12 05:23:17 PM
"It's weird that pineapple supposedly makes semen taste better. Yet semen makes pineapple taste terrible!"
-Harris's Foam Corner
 
2012-11-12 05:26:11 PM
Any sweet substance will improve the flavor. Do limit the red meat. Yes, if a woman says this is a myth, she just plain doesn't want to swallow.
 
2012-11-12 05:26:22 PM

El Supe: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And Moron, the mental image I got from that garnered an OJ spit take. My sister thinks I'm insane now.

I'm should just go ahead and save a pic for wie.

Pics or it...uh...yeah.

Anyone who wants to take a picture of your wang wearing a shotglass hat, feel free. EIP. It'd be amusing.

Simply a shotglass? Why not go classy with a top hat and monocle? Now *that* would be amusing.

Lets do this! I bet I have some guy friends willing to dress up ol' faithful, if we could stop laughing long enough to get decent pictures.

Ooh, a Mexican wrestler mask! "El Peño de Smash!"

/what have I done

You have done nothing wrong. Can we just buy a bunch of tiny hats? I have no crafting skills but I'm sure I have a few men willing to dress up and be photographed.

I used to have a blurb in my profile that I always accept WIE. I guess I'll have to put it back in, with the caveat that it has to be dressed up...

I was just thinking of shotglasses since Moronlessoff suggested it but you've opened this to WHOLE new realms.

Hmm. Maybe a cape and a little mustache drawn on?

OOO or a whale drawn on it, they've already got blowholes... *dying of laughter*

A whale drawn on it... a Sperm Whale, no doubt


Moby Dick, of course.
 
2012-11-12 05:30:28 PM
And please, if it's been awhile, do an oil change before you expect her to swallow. It tends to take on a chunky texture that us far from appetizing
 
2012-11-12 05:32:02 PM

poison_amy: And please, if it's been awhile, do an oil change before you expect her to swallow. It tends to take on a chunky texture that us far from appetizing


I've never heard it put so eloquently! Bill Hicks referred to it as the Wax Dart. "Please baby! I'll buy you a seeing eye dog!"
 
2012-11-12 05:35:18 PM

poison_amy: And please, if it's been awhile, do an oil change before you expect her to swallow. It tends to take on a chunky texture that us far from appetizing


Wow... that's... yeah.
 
2012-11-12 05:39:13 PM

poison_amy: o an oil change before you exp


I've never heard this euphemism before... is this obscure, or have i been out of the loop for a while?
 
2012-11-12 05:41:38 PM
Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P
 
2012-11-12 05:42:50 PM
It is extempore, from my mother wit.

And THAT was Shakespeare.
 
2012-11-12 05:43:38 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.


Pineapple juice for wine? How does that help?
 
2012-11-12 05:43:43 PM

kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P


j-walkblog.com
 
2012-11-12 05:44:27 PM

kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P


Yeah! I'm her first!

NSFW 
 
2012-11-12 05:45:01 PM

Meerlar: poison_amy: o an oil change before you exp

I've never heard this euphemism before... is this obscure, or have i been out of the loop for a while?


And THAT was for you.
 
2012-11-12 05:45:11 PM

catmacgregor: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

Pineapple juice for wine? How does that help?


...men drink pineapple juice, women taste the outcome?
 
2012-11-12 05:46:23 PM

kcfarker: kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P

Yeah! I'm her first!

NSFW 


I need some of those.

And nice Weiner in a hat. *applause*

Whoever did the Wang upthread gets applause too.
 
2012-11-12 05:48:22 PM

kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

Pineapple juice for wine? How does that help?

...men drink pineapple juice, women taste the outcome?


Oo, sorry, the alcohol distracted me from the sexual overtones. Got it now. Makes a more sense than a farked up cocktail of wine and pineapple juice. That just didn't seem right. 8)
 
2012-11-12 05:48:33 PM

kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P


We're all at work. That would make for some awkward conversations in the restroom. Or the conference room. Or the break room, which is where I would choose to do mine.
 
2012-11-12 05:48:42 PM
Can you blame him?? Most guys would do the same if the same opportunity arises.

cdn2-b.examiner.com

Holly Patreus

Link

Paula Boradwell
 
2012-11-12 05:49:34 PM
www.ynaija.com
 
2012-11-12 05:49:58 PM

kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

Pineapple juice for wine? How does that help?

...men drink pineapple juice, women taste the outcome?


Heh, heh, you said come
 
2012-11-12 05:57:07 PM

nharrisphoto: kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P

We're all at work. That would make for some awkward conversations in the restroom. Or the conference room. Or the break room, which is where I would choose to do mine.


To the first guy who can get a coworker to participate in this exercise and send a pic of both of you... I will write your fark handle on the inside of my thigh and send you a video of me with my vibrating chili pepper. No lie.
 
2012-11-12 05:59:33 PM

poison_amy: To the first guy who can get a coworker to participate in this exercise and send a pic of both of you... I will write your fark handle on the inside of my thigh and send you a video of me with my vibrating chili pepper. No lie.


Interesting...
 
2012-11-12 06:00:15 PM

Meatschool: kiwimoogle84: catmacgregor: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Though you have a point with the wine. I did a blind vodka taste test once and it was true, I couldn't tell the $70 bottle from the $15 without seeing them.

*joke about taste test*

Drink pineapple juice. It works. I promise.

Pineapple juice for wine? How does that help?

...men drink pineapple juice, women taste the outcome?

Heh, heh, you said come


Well. So I did. I'm not sorry.
 
2012-11-12 06:01:19 PM

poison_amy: nharrisphoto: kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P

We're all at work. That would make for some awkward conversations in the restroom. Or the conference room. Or the break room, which is where I would choose to do mine.

To the first guy who can get a coworker to participate in this exercise and send a pic of both of you... I will write your fark handle on the inside of my thigh and send you a video of me with my vibrating chili pepper. No lie.


Dude. I've got a chick coworker who would do this with me. But she's 2,000 miles away.
 
2012-11-12 06:03:55 PM

kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: nharrisphoto: kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P

We're all at work. That would make for some awkward conversations in the restroom. Or the conference room. Or the break room, which is where I would choose to do mine.

To the first guy who can get a coworker to participate in this exercise and send a pic of both of you... I will write your fark handle on the inside of my thigh and send you a video of me with my vibrating chili pepper. No lie.

Dude. I've got a chick coworker who would do this with me. But she's 2,000 miles away.


How is a chick gonna put her Weiner in a hat?
 
2012-11-12 06:06:39 PM

poison_amy: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: nharrisphoto: kiwimoogle84: Hokay, where were we?

Oh yeah.

Not a single weiner in a hat/shotglass photo so far. I am disappoint. :P

We're all at work. That would make for some awkward conversations in the restroom. Or the conference room. Or the break room, which is where I would choose to do mine.

To the first guy who can get a coworker to participate in this exercise and send a pic of both of you... I will write your fark handle on the inside of my thigh and send you a video of me with my vibrating chili pepper. No lie.

Dude. I've got a chick coworker who would do this with me. But she's 2,000 miles away.

How is a chick gonna put her Weiner in a hat?


More like, she'd get naked with me and put little hats on our bewbs or something. This chick be shameless.
 
2012-11-12 06:25:28 PM

poison_amy: calm like a bomb: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

Since you're feeling generous, my E is in my P as well.

I don't work that hard. You have to go to the trouble of getting my email address and then you send me something... Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!


I may be some sort of idiot, but Yahoo keeps telling me your EIP is invalid.
 
2012-11-12 06:30:00 PM
Like everything in life, penises have a goldilocks zone. Trouble is that the goldilocks zone varies from person to person. My advice is to just have fun finding someone 'juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right'. ;)
 
2012-11-12 06:32:42 PM

calm like a bomb: poison_amy: calm like a bomb: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

Since you're feeling generous, my E is in my P as well.

I don't work that hard. You have to go to the trouble of getting my email address and then you send me something... Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!

I may be some sort of idiot, but Yahoo keeps telling me your EIP is invalid.


I hate to call someone an idiot, but no one else seems to be experiencing this problem
 
2012-11-12 06:37:18 PM

poison_amy: calm like a bomb: poison_amy: calm like a bomb: poison_amy: argylez: poison_amy: I don't have tiny boobies. But we can probably cut a deal

BIE?

Arriving in two shakes of a lamb's tail. I'm feeling generous and AWish today

Since you're feeling generous, my E is in my P as well.

I don't work that hard. You have to go to the trouble of getting my email address and then you send me something... Then I hit "reply" and everyone gets happy!

I may be some sort of idiot, but Yahoo keeps telling me your EIP is invalid.

I hate to call someone an idiot, but no one else seems to be experiencing this problem


does Yahoo tell you there's a problem with the E in my P?
 
2012-11-12 06:50:58 PM
So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait
 
2012-11-12 06:52:24 PM

SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait


Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.
 
2012-11-12 06:54:29 PM

tafka: Like everything in life, penises have a goldilocks zone. Trouble is that the goldilocks zone varies from person to person. My advice is to just have fun finding someone 'juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right'. ;)


Dipped in porridge and drizzled with honey? I can arrange that.
 
2012-11-12 06:56:03 PM

valar_morghulis: tafka: Like everything in life, penises have a goldilocks zone. Trouble is that the goldilocks zone varies from person to person. My advice is to just have fun finding someone 'juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right'. ;)

Dipped in porridge and drizzled with honey? I can arrange that.


Listening...
 
2012-11-12 06:58:52 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.


You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?
 
2012-11-12 06:59:37 PM

kiwimoogle84: valar_morghulis: tafka: Like everything in life, penises have a goldilocks zone. Trouble is that the goldilocks zone varies from person to person. My advice is to just have fun finding someone 'juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right'. ;)

Dipped in porridge and drizzled with honey? I can arrange that.

Listening...


As long as "goldilocks zone" doesn't mean "attached to a man covered head to toe with hair".
 
2012-11-12 07:00:21 PM

SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait


What about a raspberry beret?
Red bandana Springsteen or 2pac style?
 
2012-11-12 07:00:34 PM

kiwimoogle84: valar_morghulis: tafka: Like everything in life, penises have a goldilocks zone. Trouble is that the goldilocks zone varies from person to person. My advice is to just have fun finding someone 'juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust right'. ;)

Dipped in porridge and drizzled with honey? I can arrange that.

Listening...


AKA "the Goldilicks."
 
2012-11-12 07:01:31 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?


Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...
 
2012-11-12 07:07:34 PM
Not that I'm a slut or anything, but I have experienced my fair share of variety, and therefore, have also experienced... anatomical differences. Rule of thumb for me, go down first, that way if she is one of these girls, it won't matter anymore 'cause she's already got hers.
 
2012-11-12 07:08:00 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...


It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap
 
2012-11-12 07:09:33 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...

It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap


Fap?

/EIP

(It's a BONESTORRRRRRRM)
 
2012-11-12 07:09:36 PM

rawbert7: Not that I'm a slut or anything, but I have experienced my fair share of variety, and therefore, have also experienced... anatomical differences. Rule of thumb for me, go down first, that way if she is one of these girls, it won't matter anymore 'cause she's already got hers.


The term is "experienced." And yes, I have had many shapes and sizes. Everyone has their own technique too. Really varies depending on the person.
 
2012-11-12 07:12:11 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...

It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap


Your E isn't in your P so you'll have to go first. But I'll shake on it. *shimmy*
 
2012-11-12 07:14:15 PM

kiwimoogle84: rawbert7: Not that I'm a slut or anything, but I have experienced my fair share of variety, and therefore, have also experienced... anatomical differences. Rule of thumb for me, go down first, that way if she is one of these girls, it won't matter anymore 'cause she's already got hers.

The term is "experienced." And yes, I have had many shapes and sizes. Everyone has their own technique too. Really varies depending on the person.


There truly is a pronounced anatomical variety in that regard.
 
2012-11-12 07:16:25 PM
I finally get to go home now, so I'm outta here! But the E is in the P, and the W always gets the B and sometimes the V. Good night!
 
2012-11-12 07:21:19 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: It's not the size, it's how you use it.

I use mine as a drink mixer. Am I doing it right?


Mrs. Moose uses mine as a towel rack.
 
2012-11-12 07:36:27 PM
I think that, had I the time and skill, I should like to dress mine up as each of the eleven Doctors and take pictures.
 
2012-11-12 07:39:06 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...

It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap

Your E isn't in your P so you'll have to go first. But I'll shake on it. *shimmy*


Okay you're totes getting BIE when I get off of work.
 
2012-11-12 07:42:46 PM

SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait


Compelling reason #1: I'll be settled into bed for the night at that time and that would be quite nice to see at the end of the day.

Compelling reason # the second: Because do it.
 
2012-11-12 07:46:38 PM

Joce678: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x423]

What a woman having an orgasm might look like, although we're not 100% sure...


I'm not sure, either, I think it's Leif Garret circa 1980....
 
2012-11-12 07:48:11 PM
SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait


I'll reciprocate enthusiastically. Quid pro quo.

*looks around for small, funny hats*
 
2012-11-12 07:55:30 PM

SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait


Just got out of a 6+ year relationship; could use some cheering up.
/EIP
 
2012-11-12 08:13:01 PM

nharrisphoto: I think that, had I the time and skill, I should like to dress mine up as each of the eleven Doctors and take pictures.


Best idea yet.
 
2012-11-12 08:18:09 PM

SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...

It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap

Your E isn't in your P so you'll have to go first. But I'll shake on it. *shimmy*

Okay you're totes getting BIE when I get off of work.


Rad. :)

Ok who's still at work? Or is everyone home for the night? The thread kinda died...
 
2012-11-12 08:25:45 PM

kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...

It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap

Your E isn't in your P so you'll have to go first. But I'll shake on it. *shimmy*

Okay you're totes getting BIE when I get off of work.

Rad. :)

Ok who's still at work? Or is everyone home for the night? The thread kinda died...


Just got home myself. Catching up on some Walking Dead.
 
2012-11-12 08:26:55 PM

valar_morghulis: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: kiwimoogle84: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Hey I'll take some. I've got a good reason.

You do have a very good reason. You're pretty awesome.

EIP?

Hey I'll show you mine if you show me yours...

It's a deal!

/or possibly a trap

Your E isn't in your P so you'll have to go first. But I'll shake on it. *shimmy*

Okay you're totes getting BIE when I get off of work.

Rad. :)

Ok who's still at work? Or is everyone home for the night? The thread kinda died...

Just got home myself. Catching up on some Walking Dead.


OOP! Gonna marathon all season 3 next week. Dying to see what's going on!
 
2012-11-12 08:28:17 PM
No spoilers here. Plenty of "what the f*ck did I just watch?" moments.
 
2012-11-12 08:36:39 PM

kiwimoogle84:

Ok who's still at work? Or is everyone home for the night? The thread kinda died...


Well, we did keep it going significantly pass its sell-by date.
 
2012-11-12 08:38:50 PM
My wife complains about my length. My one night stand with a coworker was thrilled with it. Sometimes you just can't win.
 
2012-11-12 08:40:26 PM

jayphat: My wife complains about my length. My one night stand with a coworker was thrilled with it. Sometimes you just can't win.


Umm, sounds like your co-worker won.
 
2012-11-12 08:40:31 PM

poison_amy: kiwimoogle84:

Ok who's still at work? Or is everyone home for the night? The thread kinda died...

Well, we did keep it going significantly pass its sell-by date.


Meh, likely. Off to make dinner!
 
2012-11-12 08:49:11 PM

poison_amy: jayphat: My wife complains about my length. My one night stand with a coworker was thrilled with it. Sometimes you just can't win.

Umm, sounds like your co-worker won.


Yeah but it was a one time thing. A farking fantastic one night thing.
 
2012-11-12 08:57:48 PM
Not a single buttsecks reference?

Try it, you (and she) will feel like you're Dirk Diggler.
 
2012-11-12 08:58:44 PM

MemeSlave: Not a single buttsecks reference?

Try it, you (and she) will feel like you're Dirk Diggler.


Only if it's done right. I've got both wonderful and horrific stories.
 
2012-11-12 08:58:46 PM

jayphat: My wife complains about my length. My one night stand with a coworker was thrilled with it. Sometimes you just can't win.


Dude, ditch the wife for the coworker!
 
2012-11-12 09:01:22 PM

david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.


No, but you do look Korean.
 
2012-11-12 09:02:23 PM
The Kama Sutra and ancient Taoist sex manuals recommend getting a partner that matches up in size. And yes, they do mention varying sizes of lady caves.
 
2012-11-12 09:30:01 PM

FunkOut: lady caves


That just sounds so... cold. Now some may like that, and that's fine, but it's not for me.
 
2012-11-12 09:35:45 PM

Meatschool: FunkOut: lady caves

That just sounds so... cold. Now some may like that, and that's fine, but it's not for me.


How sexist of you.
 
2012-11-12 09:51:35 PM

Your Average Witty Fark User: david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.

No, but you do look Korean.


5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3
 
2012-11-12 10:05:51 PM
This thread has some awesome humbelbrags.
 
2012-11-12 10:06:52 PM

valar_morghulis: This thread has some awesome humbelbrags humble brags.


derp.
 
2012-11-12 10:51:22 PM

nharrisphoto: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Compelling reason #1: I'll be settled into bed for the night at that time and that would be quite nice to see at the end of the day.

Compelling reason # the second: Because do it.


Tried to send you BIE but your email in your profile was unrecognized by teh googles (yes, I realized what you did to prevent spam). :\
 
2012-11-12 11:10:03 PM

jayphat: Your Average Witty Fark User: david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.

No, but you do look Korean.

5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3


Proof or untrue.

/eip
 
2012-11-12 11:29:35 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: Your Average Witty Fark User: david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.

No, but you do look Korean.

5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3

Proof or untrue.

/eip


I'm not releasing photographic evidence if my manhood, however if meeting in person I'll be happy to put someone on the phone to verify it.
 
2012-11-12 11:31:08 PM

jayphat: 5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3


Yeah, like any guy over seven still worries about tenths of an inch.
 
2012-11-12 11:32:57 PM

poot_rootbeer: jayphat: 5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3

Yeah, like any guy over seven still worries about tenths of an inch.


Honestly, I thought the average was 6.5. So yes, I measured to tenth of an inch for bragging rights. Not like it gets me laid or anything.
 
2012-11-12 11:33:55 PM

Joce678: AverageAmericanGuy: The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

American are constantly asked "was it good for you" so they've learned to lie just to shut the men up?

Exactly how do you measure sexual satisfaction (or anything else) without a standardized yardstick.


Satisfaction is subjective and can only be measured subjectively.

No yardstick required.
 
2012-11-12 11:35:48 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: Your Average Witty Fark User: david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.

No, but you do look Korean.

5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3

Proof or untrue.

/eip

I'm not releasing photographic evidence if my manhood, however if meeting in person I'll be happy to put someone on the phone to verify it.


Really? Really. Wow. The only guy alive who won't send a pretty girl a pic of his junk. So believable.

/eyeroll
 
2012-11-12 11:39:06 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: Your Average Witty Fark User: david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.

No, but you do look Korean.

5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3

Proof or untrue.

/eip

I'm not releasing photographic evidence if my manhood, however if meeting in person I'll be happy to put someone on the phone to verify it.

Really? Really. Wow. The only guy alive who won't send a pretty girl a pic of his junk. So believable.

/eyeroll


Fine. You'll get it in the morning.
 
2012-11-12 11:40:27 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: Your Average Witty Fark User: david_gaithersburg: AverageAmericanGuy: Defining 'average' as the length of a £20 note, which is 5.8 inches (14.9 cm), the researchers asked women if they were more likely to orgasm vaginally with a longer-than-average or shorter-than-average penis.

The average American penis is 5.1 inches. Yet American men are ranked top in bed.

Link

Maybe British men just suck at sex.
.
Interesting, I don't look Congolese.

No, but you do look Korean.

5.1"? Seriously? Now I feel even better rocking a 7.3

Proof or untrue.

/eip

I'm not releasing photographic evidence if my manhood, however if meeting in person I'll be happy to put someone on the phone to verify it.

Really? Really. Wow. The only guy alive who won't send a pretty girl a pic of his junk. So believable.

/eyeroll

Fine. You'll get it in the morning.


I haz a happy :)
 
2012-11-13 08:30:28 AM
I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread
 
2012-11-13 09:28:37 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread


I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.
 
2012-11-13 09:39:48 AM

SarahDiddle: /also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.


Because I have a tiny straw hat in a drawer at home that will be modeled in the near future.
 
2012-11-13 09:46:01 AM

poison_amy: I will write your fark handle on the inside of my thigh and send you a video of me with my vibrating chili pepper. No lie.


So, a single hat won't work?
 
2012-11-13 09:48:12 AM

kiwimoogle84: Dude. I've got a chick coworker who would do this with me.


kiwimoogle84: More like, she'd get naked with me and put little hats on our bewbs or something. This chick be shameless.


G-g-g-go on...
 
2012-11-13 09:49:53 AM

SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread

I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.


then you just do it another way until you reach the desired result
 
2012-11-13 09:58:05 AM

poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread

I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.

then you just do it another way until you reach the desired result


Everything sounds bigger with the Metric system.
 
2012-11-13 10:25:48 AM

SarahDiddle: nharrisphoto: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Compelling reason #1: I'll be settled into bed for the night at that time and that would be quite nice to see at the end of the day.

Compelling reason # the second: Because do it.

Tried to send you BIE but your email in your profile was unrecognized by teh googles (yes, I realized what you did to prevent spam). :\


Wha??? Kiwimoogle was able to send yesterday. Did you enter it exactly as it is in my profile? Because that's how it should be entered.
 
2012-11-13 10:46:55 AM

poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread

I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.

then you just do it another way until you reach the desired result


All that measuring and it might get confused and think I was trying to do something else. Then what?
 
2012-11-13 10:50:58 AM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Dude. I've got a chick coworker who would do this with me.

kiwimoogle84: More like, she'd get naked with me and put little hats on our bewbs or something. This chick be shameless.

G-g-g-go on...


This.

:)
 
2012-11-13 10:56:45 AM

SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread

I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.

then you just do it another way until you reach the desired result

All that measuring and it might get confused and think I was trying to do something else. Then what?


I suppose I could have my wife do it. Would just have to get over the "half giggling 'why do you care' " stage.
 
2012-11-13 10:58:34 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread

I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.

then you just do it another way until you reach the desired result

All that measuring and it might get confused and think I was trying to do something else. Then what?

I suppose I could have my wife do it. Would just have to get over the "half giggling 'why do you care' " stage.


I just offered to have my wife measure your dick didn't I?
 
2012-11-13 11:09:59 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: Jim from Saint Paul: SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: I think I am the only guy in the history of every to not measure his dick.

Also a grower not a shower, so by the time I reach defcon 1 I aint too worried about it.

/this is a good thread

I don't measure either. Mostly because I'm worried I'd do it wrong and get a bad result.

then you just do it another way until you reach the desired result

All that measuring and it might get confused and think I was trying to do something else. Then what?

I suppose I could have my wife do it. Would just have to get over the "half giggling 'why do you care' " stage.

I just offered to have my wife measure your dick didn't I?


I think so, yeah. You might want to run that by her first or it could get a little awkward.

/is she hot?
 
2012-11-13 11:10:33 AM
Maybe I should have a ruler tattooed on my tongue. I'd have them put the 12 on the tip and then I could charge guys for photo ops.
 
2012-11-13 11:10:46 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: I just offered to have my wife measure your dick didn't I?


That's OK, it won't take long.
 
2012-11-13 11:12:57 AM

nharrisphoto: SarahDiddle: nharrisphoto: SarahDiddle: So I'm at work and I'm trying to think of little hats.

A jauntily perched fez anyone?

/also will give bie to person with most compelling reason.
//can't send until 1030ish pm so you gotta be ok with a wait

Compelling reason #1: I'll be settled into bed for the night at that time and that would be quite nice to see at the end of the day.

Compelling reason # the second: Because do it.

Tried to send you BIE but your email in your profile was unrecognized by teh googles (yes, I realized what you did to prevent spam). :\

Wha??? Kiwimoogle was able to send yesterday. Did you enter it exactly as it is in my profile? Because that's how it should be entered.


DUDE. FOLLOW THE EFFING RULES.
 
2012-11-13 11:18:33 AM

kiwimoogle84: DUDE. FOLLOW THE EFFING RULES.


Apparently, this is necessary:
images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2012-11-13 11:21:59 AM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Dude. I've got a chick coworker who would do this with me.

kiwimoogle84: More like, she'd get naked with me and put little hats on our bewbs or something. This chick be shameless.

G-g-g-go on...


This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."
 
2012-11-13 11:23:13 AM

poison_amy: Maybe I should have a ruler tattooed on my tongue. I'd have them put the 12 on the tip and then I could charge guys for photo ops.


OH MY GOD YOU'RE JIM CARREY.

Link
 
2012-11-13 11:23:40 AM

SarahDiddle: Okay you're totes getting BIE when I get off of work.


I hope that response was meant for me . . .
 
2012-11-13 11:23:48 AM

poison_amy: Maybe I should have a ruler tattooed on my tongue. I'd have them put the 12 on the tip and then I could charge guys for photo ops.


www.geekzenith.com
 
2012-11-13 11:23:59 AM

kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."


G-g-g-go on...
 
2012-11-13 11:25:06 AM

SuperChuck:
/is she hot?


She's doable.
 
2012-11-13 11:25:28 AM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...


I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?
 
2012-11-13 11:29:19 AM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?


That had to be flattering to your holes right?
 
2012-11-13 11:33:05 AM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?


A gal pal once received a similar invitation that ended with, "You should know about my warts."

*sad trombone*
 
2012-11-13 11:33:12 AM

SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?

That had to be flattering to your holes right?


Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*
 
2012-11-13 11:37:58 AM
Well, yes, of course, but . . . first things first.
 
2012-11-13 11:40:57 AM

MoronLessOff: Apparently, this is necessary:[bieRules.jpg]


Just out of curiosity, does anyone know who this lady is and the story behind the pic?
 
2012-11-13 11:41:44 AM

kiwimoogle84: SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?

That had to be flattering to your holes right?

Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*


I'm more like a series of tubes.
 
2012-11-13 11:42:57 AM

poison_amy: kiwimoogle84: SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?

That had to be flattering to your holes right?

Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*

I'm more like a series of tubes.


HA!!! Haha!! Omg that's beautiful! Well put, and well played!
 
2012-11-13 11:44:27 AM

nharrisphoto: Someone who should not have been named was able to send yesterday.


Party foul. Her profile pic indicates she's pretty attractive and now she can't send you any more bie.
 
2012-11-13 11:46:47 AM

DingleberryMoose: nharrisphoto: Someone who should not have been named was able to send yesterday.

Party foul. Her profile pic indicates she's pretty attractive and now she can't send you any more bie.


No need to call any more attention to the aforementioned foul. It's been corrected. The people involved have kissed and made up, or so I hear...

And yeah, that chick? Day to day she's kinda meh but she cleans up like crazy. I heard she was recruited for suicide girls a couple years back.
 
2012-11-13 11:47:44 AM

kiwimoogle84: SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?

That had to be flattering to your holes right?

Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*


Oh you women and your "self-esteem". Pffffffffffffffff.
 
2012-11-13 11:48:27 AM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?

That had to be flattering to your holes right?

Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*

Oh you women and your "self-esteem". Pffffffffffffffff.


Dude, I *will* spank you.
 
2012-11-13 11:50:04 AM

kiwimoogle84: she cleans up like crazy.


Do tell?
 
2012-11-13 11:50:46 AM

kiwimoogle84: Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*


Too right, legs.
 
2012-11-13 11:50:53 AM
Mods, please delete my last post :)
 
2012-11-13 11:51:21 AM

DingleberryMoose: kiwimoogle84: she cleans up like crazy.

Do tell?


I can ask her to send evidence if your E is in P... She's kinda busy today though but hopefully she'll get to it in a timely manner...
 
2012-11-13 11:52:07 AM

kiwimoogle84: And yeah, that chick? Day to day she's kinda meh but she cleans up like crazy. I heard she was recruited for suicide girls a couple years back.


G-g-g-go on...

You know I like my women inky.
 
2012-11-13 11:53:01 AM

kiwimoogle84: I can ask her to send evidence if your E is in P... She's kinda busy today though but hopefully she'll get to it in a timely manner...


*ahem*
 
2012-11-13 11:53:45 AM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And yeah, that chick? Day to day she's kinda meh but she cleans up like crazy. I heard she was recruited for suicide girls a couple years back.

G-g-g-go on...

You know I like my women inky.


You misspelled "kinky".

I hear this chick is both. One time, she had sex while handcuffed in the back of a cop car on the side of the freeway in broad daylight.
 
2012-11-13 11:54:25 AM

kiwimoogle84: I can ask her to send evidence if your E is in P... She's kinda busy today though but hopefully she'll get to it in a timely manner...


Oh, it's there all right, but I guarantee Mr. Moose is kind enough not to reciprocate.

i.chzbgr.com
 
2012-11-13 11:55:25 AM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: This girl has no shame. She's also a bit slutty, so I don't recommend anyone actually sleeping with her, but she once invited me to a group sex party involving a straight guy, a gay guy, and a T guy, because they "needed more holes."

G-g-g-go on...

I said no. I'm not stupid, dude. She has the herp.

But it was a fun story, neh?

That had to be flattering to your holes right?

Oh yeah. Though I'm more than a set of holes, but *shrug*

Oh you women and your "self-esteem". Pffffffffffffffff.

Dude, I *will* spank you.


kevinjshutt.com
 
2012-11-13 12:01:27 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And yeah, that chick? Day to day she's kinda meh but she cleans up like crazy. I heard she was recruited for suicide girls a couple years back.

G-g-g-go on...

You know I like my women inky.

You misspelled "kinky".

I hear this chick is both. One time, she had sex while handcuffed in the back of a cop car on the side of the freeway in broad daylight.


No way....
 
2012-11-13 12:03:23 PM

SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: And yeah, that chick? Day to day she's kinda meh but she cleans up like crazy. I heard she was recruited for suicide girls a couple years back.

G-g-g-go on...

You know I like my women inky.

You misspelled "kinky".

I hear this chick is both. One time, she had sex while handcuffed in the back of a cop car on the side of the freeway in broad daylight.

No way....


Yup. Some people say it doesn't count since she was dating the cop, but I say more power to her...
 
2012-11-13 12:10:06 PM

kiwimoogle84: Yup. Some people say it doesn't count since she was dating the cop, but I say more power to her...


I'm not having any luck finding a screen cap, but I'm thinking of the scene in Bridesmaids where Kristen Wiig's cop boyfriend is showing her how to use the radar gun.

Also, I'm glad this thread is picking up. I got some great rest last night and I'm ready for round 2.
 
2012-11-13 12:11:06 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Yup. Some people say it doesn't count since she was dating the cop, but I say more power to her...

I'm not having any luck finding a screen cap, but I'm thinking of the scene in Bridesmaids where Kristen Wiig's cop boyfriend is showing her how to use the radar gun.

Also, I'm glad this thread is picking up. I got some great rest last night and I'm ready for round 2.


I asked the ambassador to send the beacon... I don't know where he's at though :/
 
2012-11-13 12:14:18 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Yup. Some people say it doesn't count since she was dating the cop, but I say more power to her...

I'm not having any luck finding a screen cap, but I'm thinking of the scene in Bridesmaids where Kristen Wiig's cop boyfriend is showing her how to use the radar gun.

Also, I'm glad this thread is picking up. I got some great rest last night and I'm ready for round 2.

I asked the ambassador to send the beacon... I don't know where he's at though :/


I'm kind of surprised it wasn't sent yesterday.
 
2012-11-13 12:24:07 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Yup. Some people say it doesn't count since she was dating the cop, but I say more power to her...

I'm not having any luck finding a screen cap, but I'm thinking of the scene in Bridesmaids where Kristen Wiig's cop boyfriend is showing her how to use the radar gun.

Also, I'm glad this thread is picking up. I got some great rest last night and I'm ready for round 2.

I asked the ambassador to send the beacon... I don't know where he's at though :/

I'm kind of surprised it wasn't sent yesterday.


Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.
 
2012-11-13 12:25:43 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Yup. Some people say it doesn't count since she was dating the cop, but I say more power to her...

I'm not having any luck finding a screen cap, but I'm thinking of the scene in Bridesmaids where Kristen Wiig's cop boyfriend is showing her how to use the radar gun.

Also, I'm glad this thread is picking up. I got some great rest last night and I'm ready for round 2.

I asked the ambassador to send the beacon... I don't know where he's at though :/

I'm kind of surprised it wasn't sent yesterday.

Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.


If there's a way to get a spanking in my email, sign me up
 
2012-11-13 12:26:45 PM

kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.


I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.
 
2012-11-13 12:33:13 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.


A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.
 
2012-11-13 12:34:56 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.


This. Not looking to have frickin welts the next day. A good swat or 2 from a hand? That'll work.
 
2012-11-13 12:44:46 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.


Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.
 
2012-11-13 12:48:37 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.


I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.
 
2012-11-13 12:54:22 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.


I demand video evidence of this encounter.
 
2012-11-13 12:54:39 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.


HandPrintIE?
 
2012-11-13 12:58:08 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: I demand video evidence of this encounter.


Rule 5.
 
2012-11-13 01:00:01 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

HandPrintIE?


farm9.staticflickr.com


You all forget how tall I am. That big paw helped a ton while playing softball.
 
2012-11-13 01:02:38 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

HandPrintIE?

[farm9.staticflickr.com image 300x400]


You all forget how tall I am. That big paw helped a ton while playing softball.


Well...time for a break. I have something that needs taking care of.
 
2012-11-13 01:13:37 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

HandPrintIE?

[farm9.staticflickr.com image 300x400]


You all forget how tall I am. That big paw helped a ton while playing softball.

Well...time for a break. I have something that needs taking care of.


Hand pr0n?
 
2012-11-13 01:15:27 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

I demand video evidence of this encounter.


MoronLessOff: Jim from Saint Paul: I demand video evidence of this encounter.

Rule 5.


I cordially demand that you please give me video evidence of this encounter. Faliure is not an option.
 
2012-11-13 01:15:28 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

HandPrintIE?

[farm9.staticflickr.com image 300x400]


You all forget how tall I am. That big paw helped a ton while playing softball.

Well...time for a break. I have something that needs taking care of.

Hand pr0n?


Maybe I should send out HIE.
 
2012-11-13 01:28:29 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

HandPrintIE?

[farm9.staticflickr.com image 300x400]


You all forget how tall I am. That big paw helped a ton while playing softball.

Well...time for a break. I have something that needs taking care of.

Hand pr0n?

Maybe I should send out HIE.


EIP
 
2012-11-13 01:29:20 PM

MoronLessOff: Jim from Saint Paul: I demand video evidence of this encounter.

Rule 5.


I politely and respectfully request video evidence of this encounter.
 
2012-11-13 01:44:55 PM

DingleberryMoose: MoronLessOff: Jim from Saint Paul: I demand video evidence of this encounter.

Rule 5.

I politely and respectfully request video evidence of this encounter.


If spanking in person occurs, I'll put y'all on a mailing list.
 
2012-11-13 01:45:18 PM

kiwimoogle84: Princess


"When it comes to penises, length matters more to men than to women, according to a new study that reviews more than 60 years of research and debunks numerous sex myths.

About 90 percent of women actually prefer a wide penis to a long one, according to two studies included in the review."

Dozens of studies and nearly all of them sadly are, like this one, based on feeling and not based on actual science (blind testing).
 
2012-11-13 01:49:20 PM

kiwimoogle84: If spanking in person occurs, I'll put y'all on a mailing list.


I'll be right over.
 
2012-11-13 01:53:02 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: If spanking in person occurs, I'll put y'all on a mailing list.

I'll be right over.


I'm working tonight and have to go and get some sleep, but I eagerly await evidence of said encounter.
 
2012-11-13 01:58:56 PM
I haz a happy.
 
2012-11-13 02:25:03 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.


Go on.....
 
2012-11-13 02:26:30 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

Go on.....


Know what big, strong hands on a chick are good for?

Massages.

Take that as you will.
 
2012-11-13 02:29:46 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

Go on.....

Know what big, strong hands on a chick are good for?

Massages.

Take that as you will.


Coupled with the strength to grip and whip softballs around, yet the dexterity required for piano.

Dammit. I need another break.
 
2012-11-13 02:34:26 PM
I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.
 
2012-11-13 02:37:52 PM

poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.


I think I've found my measurement specialist
 
2012-11-13 02:38:44 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: Anyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Spankings.

I have an oar in the garage I can saw down to a paddle.

A paddle? Please. I prefer the markings of individual fingers. It's more satisfying.

Have you seen the size of my mitts? Paddle might be easier on you.

I can reach an octave and two keys on the piano with my hand span.

Game on.

Go on.....

Know what big, strong hands on a chick are good for?

Massages.

Take that as you will.


A massagge. Not even an inuenendo filled (heh "in-u-endo filled, heh heh) massagge, but a REAL one sounds GREAT right now.

Might have to get the Mrs and I a "couples one".

Damn this thread is good.
 
2012-11-13 02:39:43 PM

SuperChuck: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

I think I've found my measurement specialist


DAMNIT, I was too slow. lol

/you see the right size to me ma'am
 
2012-11-13 02:46:41 PM

poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.


Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.
 
2012-11-13 02:49:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.


I have a line for that, but I think I've hit my limit for the day.
 
2012-11-13 02:51:08 PM

kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.


Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.
 
2012-11-13 02:52:44 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.


Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.
 
2012-11-13 03:02:02 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.


I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?
 
2012-11-13 03:07:24 PM

kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.


Hey now, that's on you. Find a taller guy, where do you live anyway? Oz? :P
 
2012-11-13 03:07:26 PM

kiwimoogle84: I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up.


Don't worry. I'll take care of that for you. And I can open pickle jars!
 
2012-11-13 03:10:15 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?


5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.
 
2012-11-13 03:11:14 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up.

Don't worry. I'll take care of that for you. And I can open pickle jars!


Mmmm pickles... You got a big kosher dill for me?
 
2012-11-13 03:17:28 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.


Oh that's fine with me. I'm 6'3", 140 lbs BUT I am stronger than I look.
 
2012-11-13 03:20:56 PM

kiwimoogle84: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up.

Don't worry. I'll take care of that for you. And I can open pickle jars!

Mmmm pickles... You got a big kosher dill for me?


Fresh and crispy!
 
2012-11-13 03:21:17 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.

Oh that's fine with me. I'm 6'3", 140 lbs BUT I am stronger than I look.


Oh hell no. No offense but I can't outweigh my men. Complex. Besides, I'd snap you like a twig. Ain't you, it's me.
 
2012-11-13 03:25:41 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.

Oh that's fine with me. I'm 6'3", 140 lbs BUT I am stronger than I look.

Oh hell no. No offense but I can't outweigh my men. Complex. Besides, I'd snap you like a twig. Ain't you, it's me.


Trust me, there's nothing you can do to break me. And as for the weight thing, that's exactly what the coworker said and we all saw how THAT turned out.
 
2012-11-13 03:28:10 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.

Oh that's fine with me. I'm 6'3", 140 lbs BUT I am stronger than I look.

Oh hell no. No offense but I can't outweigh my men. Complex. Besides, I'd snap you like a twig. Ain't you, it's me.


lol

/got the taller then you down
//bit bigger then you're looking for though (335, all in the gut really)
////my wife could only find me attractive because she married the 270 version
 
2012-11-13 03:29:28 PM

jayphat: Trust me, there's nothing you can do to break me.


I'm 2 inches shorter and 40 lbs heavier than you. Are you kidding? You probably need to be tied down in a strong wind.
 
2012-11-13 03:30:17 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.


I was with a lady that was 6'1" a few times... things are MUCH easier when your partner is (at least roughly) the same height you are.
 
2012-11-13 03:32:10 PM

MoronLessOff: jayphat: Trust me, there's nothing you can do to break me.

I'm 2 inches shorter and 40 lbs heavier than you. Are you kidding? You probably need to be tied down in a strong wind.


Everyone says that. I'm constantly eating. My metabolism is through the roof still at age 31.

As a point of reference, my wife is more than double my weight. So no, 160 isn't going to hurt me.
 
2012-11-13 03:32:17 PM
Man, I would love to hook up with a tall chick. You know, if I was single.
 
2012-11-13 03:34:36 PM

SuperChuck: Man, I would love to hook up with a tall chick. You know, if I was single.


WORD.
 
2012-11-13 03:42:01 PM
HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)
 
2012-11-13 03:45:22 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.

Oh that's fine with me. I'm 6'3", 140 lbs BUT I am stronger than I look.

Oh hell no. No offense but I can't outweigh my men. Complex. Besides, I'd snap you like a twig. Ain't you, it's me.

lol

/got the taller then you down
//bit bigger then you're looking for though (335, all in the gut really)
////my wife could only find me attractive because she married the 270 version


I like big guys...my last bf was 270lb 6'5 IFL linebacker. He could pick me up and tote me about easily.
 
2012-11-13 03:46:41 PM

kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)


We should fight some time. It would be fun. I'll wrestle, you can use elbows and knees. No biting, eye gouging, fish hooking, small joint manipulation. You game?
 
2012-11-13 03:49:11 PM

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

We should fight some time. It would be fun. I'll wrestle, you can use elbows and knees. No biting, eye gouging, fish hooking, small joint manipulation. You game?


I love wrestling. I'm slippery, you'd better be careful. I don't elbow or knee either. I'm disciplined.
 
2012-11-13 03:50:30 PM

kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)


I am just saying, i may not have the mass, but I have more fight in me than you think.
 
2012-11-13 03:50:34 PM

kiwimoogle84: I love wrestling. I'm slippery, you'd better be careful. I don't elbow or knee either. I'm disciplined.


It's ON!
 
2012-11-13 03:52:59 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

I am just saying, i may not have the mass, but I have more fight in me than you think.


I believe you :)
 
2012-11-13 03:53:16 PM

kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)


i2.kym-cdn.com 

sounds like a challenge...
 
2012-11-13 03:54:02 PM

Meerlar: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

[i2.kym-cdn.com image 400x300] 

sounds like a challenge...


^THIS^
 
2012-11-13 03:58:18 PM
Well there's really only one way to find out, you know. Ok, everyone meets in Nebraska (it's the center of the US) and we'll have a wrestle-a-thon. Maybe we can get Drew to sponsor it :P
 
2012-11-13 04:02:04 PM

kiwimoogle84: Well there's really only one way to find out, you know. Ok, everyone meets in Nebraska (it's the center of the US) and we'll have a wrestle-a-thon. Maybe we can get Drew to sponsor it :P


Yeah, let me get on the phone with my boss and see if we can get some sort of conference for the company set up in Nebraska. Otherwise, everyone to Ohio.
 
2012-11-13 04:10:52 PM

kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)


I'm pretty sure I'd let you take me down regardless of my weight advantage
 
2012-11-13 04:14:48 PM

kiwimoogle84: Well there's really only one way to find out, you know. Ok, everyone meets in Nebraska (it's the center of the US) and we'll have a wrestle-a-thon. Maybe we can get Drew to sponsor it :P


Well, if I have to fight others, I'm fighting dirty.
 
2012-11-13 04:15:35 PM

kiwimoogle84: Well there's really only one way to find out, you know. Ok, everyone meets in Nebraska (it's the center of the US) and we'll have a wrestle-a-thon. Maybe we can get Drew to sponsor it :P


FINALLY. Something to actually DO in Nebraska.
 
2012-11-13 04:16:24 PM

poison_amy: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Jim from Saint Paul: kiwimoogle84: poison_amy: I have little hands. But, things might look bigger in comparison...

Comically small feet too, but I'm barely five feet tall.

Oh, what I would GIVE to be that short. And yeah, comparisons are good for little hands. Mine dwarf people and scare them away.

Grass is greener. I mean, you don't even need a big tall man to grab things from the top shelf nor a big strong one to open jars.

Yes, and I keep dating guys who weigh less than me or can't pick me up. It gives me a complex. But I'll take what I've been given.

I won't ask weight, but how tall are you?

5'10 and 160. I don't mind. It's 90% in my legs anyway.

Oh that's fine with me. I'm 6'3", 140 lbs BUT I am stronger than I look.

Oh hell no. No offense but I can't outweigh my men. Complex. Besides, I'd snap you like a twig. Ain't you, it's me.

lol

/got the taller then you down
//bit bigger then you're looking for though (335, all in the gut really)
////my wife could only find me attractive because she married the 270 version

I like big guys...my last bf was 270lb 6'5 IFL linebacker. He could pick me up and tote me about easily.


Yeah, at least from the head down he was MUCH better looking then me. lol
 
2012-11-13 04:33:36 PM

kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)


So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?
 
2012-11-13 04:36:45 PM

new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?


If she passes.... Um, how YOU doin'?
 
2012-11-13 04:37:03 PM

new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?


Why yes, yes it would. Gotta be at least my height in my heels.

Although when I'm laying down it doesn't matter, but I digress. *wink wink nudge*
 
2012-11-13 04:39:34 PM

poison_amy: new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?

If she passes.... Um, how YOU doin'?


kiwimoogle84: new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?

Why yes, yes it would. Gotta be at least my height in my heels.

Although when I'm laying down it doesn't matter, but I digress. *wink wink nudge*



Ahhh... if only I weren't living in middle-of-nowhere Appalachia these days.
 
2012-11-13 04:51:37 PM

new_york_monty: poison_amy: new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?

If she passes.... Um, how YOU doin'?

kiwimoogle84: new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?

Why yes, yes it would. Gotta be at least my height in my heels.

Although when I'm laying down it doesn't matter, but I digress. *wink wink nudge*


Ahhh... if only I weren't living in middle-of-nowhere Appalachia these days.


If only I wasn't married. I wouldn't give a fark about their location.
 
2012-11-13 05:06:30 PM

jayphat: new_york_monty: poison_amy: new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?

If she passes.... Um, how YOU doin'?

kiwimoogle84: new_york_monty: kiwimoogle84: HA! You guys are funny. I like a guy who can overtake me. A man I outweigh, I can take down. Not my cup of tea :)

So 6'2" and 225lbs is right in your wheelhouse?

Why yes, yes it would. Gotta be at least my height in my heels.

Although when I'm laying down it doesn't matter, but I digress. *wink wink nudge*


Ahhh... if only I weren't living in middle-of-nowhere Appalachia these days.

If only I wasn't married. I wouldn't give a fark about their location.


Touche
 
2012-11-13 05:33:45 PM
Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.
 
2012-11-13 05:52:57 PM

kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.


Oh so true. There's the whole time issue as well. Working pays the bills, but stops up the calendar pretty good too.
 
2012-11-13 06:18:26 PM

kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.


go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap
 
2012-11-13 06:21:05 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap


I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.
 
2012-11-13 06:27:00 PM

kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.


The first rule of fight club.....
 
2012-11-13 08:03:15 PM

jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....


And now the thread has come full circle.
 
2012-11-13 08:21:09 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.


This thread has made my week. Thank all of you.
 
2012-11-13 08:22:37 PM

Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.


I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.
 
2012-11-13 09:44:06 PM

SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.


Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?
 
2012-11-13 09:55:00 PM

poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.

Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?


If you're feeling generous, I'm feeling lucky ;}
 
2012-11-13 10:12:16 PM

SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.

Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?

If you're feeling generous, I'm feeling lucky ;}


lucky man
 
2012-11-13 10:14:45 PM

jayphat: SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.

Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?

If you're feeling generous, I'm feeling lucky ;}

lucky man


Equal opportunities for all.
 
2012-11-13 10:17:04 PM

poison_amy: jayphat: SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.

Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?

If you're feeling generous, I'm feeling lucky ;}

lucky man

Equal opportunities for all.


EIP
 
2012-11-13 10:21:47 PM

jayphat:

EIP


are you sure?
 
2012-11-13 10:23:40 PM

poison_amy: jayphat:

EIP

are you sure?


It is now. Thought I had changed it to public.
 
2012-11-13 10:24:29 PM

jayphat: SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.

Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?

If you're feeling generous, I'm feeling lucky ;}

lucky man


farkettes are the best. never forget it
 
2012-11-13 10:29:08 PM

SuperChuck:


farkettes are the best. never forget it




Awwww.... melted my cold, cold heart.
 
2012-11-13 10:29:37 PM

SuperChuck: jayphat: SuperChuck: poison_amy: SuperChuck: Jim from Saint Paul: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: jayphat: kiwimoogle84: Well it costs money to get places, you know. I have many farkers and farkettes I'd LOVE to visit but travel ain't cheap.

go on......

/ditto on travel ain't cheap

I'm not allowed to name names :) I just have Fark friends all over is what I mean.

The first rule of fight clubBIE.....

And now the thread has come full circle.

I'm still sitting at a semi(circle). I was late so no BIE for me.

Let it never be said that someone suffered a lack of BIE for being late. I see the E in your P, ready for the B?

If you're feeling generous, I'm feeling lucky ;}

lucky man

farkettes are the best. never forget it


I've known this for some time.
 
2012-11-14 08:24:57 AM
If you know what your doing, you don't even need penetration to get her off.
 
2012-11-14 12:52:43 PM

Pick: If you know what your doing, you don't even need penetration to get her off.


But it's more fun if you do
 
2012-11-14 05:11:18 PM

SuperChuck: Pick: If you know what your doing, you don't even need penetration to get her off.

But it's more fun if you do


^THIS
 
2012-11-14 06:21:24 PM
Starting to smell funny in here...
 
2012-11-14 07:03:39 PM
Don't look at me, I showered today
 
2012-11-14 07:29:01 PM

SuperChuck: Don't look at me, I showered today


Pfff. Today. Are one of those rich folk?
 
2012-11-14 08:42:28 PM

jayphat: SuperChuck: Don't look at me, I showered today

Pfff. Today. Are one of those rich folk?


I was but the cost of all those trips to the gym is starting to add up
 
2012-11-15 08:23:54 AM

lewismarktwo: Starting to smell funny in here...


Well the girls left, so there's that.
 
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