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(Examiner)   Texas wants to secede from the Union? Boring.... Fifteen states file petitions to secede? Now we're talking   (examiner.com ) divider line
    More: Followup, Texas, United States, petitions  
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10313 clicks; posted to Politics » on 11 Nov 2012 at 4:19 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



307 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2012-11-11 12:58:37 PM  
Still boring
 
2012-11-11 01:03:10 PM  
Some random idiot sends off a letter. Wake me up when it's the governor and senators making the request.
 
2012-11-11 01:03:27 PM  
Any old asshole can file a petition.

www.joeydevilla.com
 
2012-11-11 01:03:36 PM  
sedition ? treason ? should people be arrested now.
 
2012-11-11 01:06:17 PM  

sithon: sedition ? treason ? should people be arrested now.


And all because the Black Guy won.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-11-11 01:12:47 PM  
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-11 01:13:19 PM  
Well, so much for working together for a better country. As usual, the GOP slags are doing the dirty work for their puppet masters. 

Same as it ever was.....(youtube)
 
2012-11-11 01:26:01 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: Some random idiot sends off a letter. Wake me up when it's the governor and senators making the request.


At this point, wouldn't surprise me if that was in the works.
 
2012-11-11 01:30:22 PM  
So its up to the Executive branch to grant secession now?

News to me.
 
2012-11-11 02:04:45 PM  

PreMortem: So its up to the Executive branch to grant secession now?
News to me.


Yeah. The most the President can do is recommend the necessary constitutional Amendment to congress... but, that recommendation is indeed within his power.

If they agree to a short period (say, 12 years) for people who do/don't want to leave the US to sort themselves out across the new borders, to assume a per-capita share of the US national debt (in exchange for a per-capita share of the Social Security Trust), leaving the Mississippi river open to trade, I think the departure of the South could be peacefully negotiated.

Taking em back? More expensive.
 
2012-11-11 02:28:13 PM  
More like cranky hillbillies in 15 states want to waste the taxpayer's time & money because Rmoney's defeat gave them epic amounts of butthurt, and drama-queens gotta drama-queen.
 
2012-11-11 02:32:07 PM  
Poor things. So brainwashed. Bless their hearts.
 
2012-11-11 02:33:55 PM  
The states aren't filing, dumbfark.
 
2012-11-11 02:34:09 PM  
Get on with it!
 
2012-11-11 02:37:30 PM  
I like that the petition specifically mentions "blatant abuses of their rights such as the NDAA, the TSA, etc."
The only two TX House Reps who voted 'NO' on the NDAA are Ruben Hinojoso and Michael Burgess. The TSA was created by Texan George W. Bush.
By the way, Ron Paul was a vocal opponent of the NDAA, but couldn't be bothered to come in to vote against it.
 
2012-11-11 02:50:14 PM  
Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-11-11 03:02:22 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.


I think they believe that 99% of the military is good'ol boys who would be on their side.
 
2012-11-11 03:08:19 PM  

vpb: OtherLittleGuy: Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.

I think they believe that 99% of the military is good'ol boys who would be on their side.


A) Cite your figure, please.
B) They'd all choose to betray their loyalty to 'Murika?
 
2012-11-11 03:26:18 PM  
I like how they're using a website created by the Obama Administration to show how they want to leave it.
 
2012-11-11 03:36:50 PM  
idiots.
 
2012-11-11 04:03:13 PM  
For a such a bunch of hard-nosed unyielding SOBs, these right-wingers are surprisingly whiny.
 
2012-11-11 04:07:01 PM  
I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistaken. The Tea Party / Racist / Separatist Right is here to stay, and they won't quit til they get their way, which is their own country run by American Taliban.

And I'd be fine with giving it to them, but the problem is then they would declare war on us probably the next minute.

And then my quality of life drops because I have to support rounding them up and shooting them like the swine they are. And that sucks, there's so much better uses for that money.
 
2012-11-11 04:08:14 PM  
SOVEREIGN CITIZEN
hurr
 
2012-11-11 04:23:16 PM  
Can't wait for my taxes to drop from the southern states no longer mooching off the other states!
 
2012-11-11 04:24:18 PM  
Morons.
 
2012-11-11 04:25:17 PM  
I can think of a handful of states I'd happily sign petitions to be rid of.
 
2012-11-11 04:25:24 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: Some random idiot sends off a letter. Wake me up when it's the governor and senators making the request.


And since when do these random idiots amount to The State wanting to secede?
 
2012-11-11 04:26:21 PM  
No one's done this yet?

theelephantgun.files.wordpress.com

DNRTFA
 
2012-11-11 04:27:01 PM  
oh gawd let oregon go. pleasepleasepleaseplease!
 
2012-11-11 04:27:27 PM  

Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake


They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.
 
2012-11-11 04:27:35 PM  
don't let the door hit ya
where the good lord split ya.
 
2012-11-11 04:28:50 PM  
Fine. Just pay your part of the debt first.
 
2012-11-11 04:29:23 PM  
Laura Pank,"And I think that you are one of those retards that think the welfare state and doing nothing is the answer. I think that you are a disillusioned idiot if you think that things are going to get better from here. OPEN YOUR EYES to the TYRANNY from BOTH PARTIES, OPEN YOUR EYES to Agenda 21. And then, OPEN YOUR EYES and look at the history books and you will see that if we continue on the same path that we will be America "aka China #2" in a few more yests"

Study it out!

I'd like to believe comments like these aren't sincere. I really would.
 
2012-11-11 04:29:23 PM  

YouAreItNoTagBacks: No one's done this yet?

[theelephantgun.files.wordpress.com image 299x156]

DNRTFA


It includes Oregon. While my fellow Californians might cut my dick off for this... I LOVE Oregon.

Not Oregon drivers though. You farking suck.
 
2012-11-11 04:29:47 PM  
I'm a little surprised that my state (Montana) would be one of them. Seeing as our new Governor is a Democrat.
 
2012-11-11 04:29:58 PM  
Hey morans,

"Love it or leave it" refers to you, personally, not the actual land of the United States. If you don't want to be a part of this country, you're free to go to any country that will take you, but the landmass that is your state stays.
 
2012-11-11 04:30:10 PM  
i20.photobucket.com

It's treason, then...
 
2012-11-11 04:30:52 PM  

The All-Powerful Atheismo: YouAreItNoTagBacks: No one's done this yet?

[theelephantgun.files.wordpress.com image 299x156]

DNRTFA

It includes Oregon a few freaking dumbasses from Oregon who managed to find the White House petition website. While my fellow Californians might cut my dick off for this... I LOVE Oregon.

Not Oregon drivers though. You farking suck.


FTFY

Caught the Cal game yesterday...brutal.
 
2012-11-11 04:31:18 PM  
DOOOOOOOOOOOO IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTT, SUCKAS!

/Double-dog dare ya.
 
2012-11-11 04:31:32 PM  
It isn't even about north and south. This is just urban vs. rural now. That's the reason states like Oregon, New Jersey and New York are in that list. Because stupid hicks in rural areas are similar on either side of the Mason-Dixon line.
 
2012-11-11 04:32:05 PM  
Somehow a petition to secede on the White House website doesn't seem official but signing one does get your Name on a Government Computer file.
 
2012-11-11 04:32:18 PM  
farking idiots.
 
2012-11-11 04:32:26 PM  
Not getting paid to get shot is no way to go through life.
 
2012-11-11 04:32:36 PM  
Good luck with that.

Call me when this gets past the "Crank with a keyboard firing off letters" stage. You know, when legislators and Governors are making these sorts of calls. Folks certainly have the right to mutter and natter on, but if they're going to rely on militias to get 'er done, they might want to reconsider.

FTFA:

As of 12:46 am, Sunday, signatures obtained by Louisiana, 7,358; Texas, 3,771; Florida, 636; Georgia, 475; Alabama, 834; North Carolina, 792; Kentucky, 467; Mississippi, 475; Indiana, 449; North Dakota, 162; Montana, 440; Colorado, 324; Oregon, 328; New Jersey, 301 and New York, 169. Many more States are expected to follow.

Interesting to note that Arizona and Nevada aren't on that list. Then again, they sort of rely on Hoover Dam to make their communities actually viable...
 
2012-11-11 04:33:23 PM  
I'm going to have to point out that reporting on this level of derpitude in such a manner as to indicate that the "states" themselves are filing is proooooooobably contributing to the overall level of stupid in terms of understanding how government functions.
 
2012-11-11 04:33:54 PM  
FTA: Louisiana, Texas, Montana, North Dakota, Indiana, Mississippi, Kentucky, North Carolina, Alabama, Florida, Georgia, New Jersey, Colorado, Oregon and New York

So, those five states went to Obama, one of them by 26.8 points. Also, subby, the top comment from the article about sums it up: The headline should read, "An Insignificant Number of Fringe Retards in 15 States File Meaningless Petitions". That would be accurate.....

Also, KY and CO? What the fark are you retards thinking (I know it's not the whole state, just a bunch of idiots)? You're landlocked, and completely surrounded by a country you are talking about leaving, or even fighting a war against. You do realize that the rest of the country could just boycott all trade with you, not allow anyone else to use our roads or airspace to trade with you, not allow you to use our roads or airspace, patrol the shiat out of your border and not recognize you as a legitimate country (meaning your citizens could never leave the state), and basically lock you into a state of isolation.... right? You do get that?
 
2012-11-11 04:33:54 PM  

randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


So you're saying that you believe the Democrats should shift to the left?
 
2012-11-11 04:34:19 PM  

Eagle2001: Hey morans,

"Love it or leave it" refers to you, personally, not the actual land of the United States. If you don't want to be a part of this country, you're free to go to any country that will take you, but the landmass that is your state stays.


I rarely take the "you don't like it here? Buhbye" approach, but when it comes to seceding from the nation.. ya. Buhbye. But your land stays here. If enough of you get together and want to do a buyout of some kind I would be on board with it. Sell some of our border with mexico, and draw the new lines in a way such that we have less border to guard. You don't get any coast though, because we like all that. You get nothing that could be classified as upriver either, because we know how you farkers are going to pollute the shiat out of it immediately. Good luck have fun!
 
2012-11-11 04:35:01 PM  

Sock Ruh Tease: It isn't even about north and south. This is just urban vs. rural now. That's the reason states like Oregon, New Jersey and New York are in that list. Because stupid hicks in rural areas are similar on either side of the Mason-Dixon line.


I live in (semi) rural Oregon. I can vouch for this.

/ it gets even derpier in the southern part of the State, and in the east...
 
2012-11-11 04:35:14 PM  
They bought their tickets, I say let em die.jpeg
 
2012-11-11 04:35:23 PM  
Every last person connected to that is a goddamn idiot that should be punched in the face for being a pissy whiny baby for losing an election to the black liberal.

What a bunch of dumbass chucklef*cks.
 
2012-11-11 04:35:43 PM  
Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.
 
2012-11-11 04:36:00 PM  

randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


when the GOP kicked out all their moderates, where do you think a lot of them ended up? sure, some went to the libertarians...but even more went Democrat.
 
2012-11-11 04:36:21 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.


Naaa, Just have Obama declare that since they are no longer willing to be part of the nation, we can no longer trust them enough to place military bases there.
So, for example, we are closing down Fort Bragg in Texas and moving it to some other more reasonable state. .
 
2012-11-11 04:36:58 PM  
These citizen generated petitions...

Did they also request naked pictures of Bea Aurthur?
 
2012-11-11 04:37:17 PM  

js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.


I can't speak for anyone else here but...I gotta be honest. some days I find it very difficult to tell the tea party from the UFO nutballs and 'sovereign state' wackos.
 
2012-11-11 04:37:21 PM  
Do it f@99ot
 
2012-11-11 04:37:28 PM  

randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


Not that I accept your premise, but you're saying that the extreme, reality-denying GOPers are caused by a rightward-moving left?
 
2012-11-11 04:37:29 PM  

Russ1642: Arthur Jumbles: Some random idiot sends off a letter. Wake me up when it's the governor and senators making the request.

And since when do these random idiots amount to The State wanting to secede?


Since the Examiner (home of unskewed pollster Dean Chambers) degrees it so. They're equivalent to WND and Freeperville in the derp department. Point and laugh and then move on.
 
2012-11-11 04:37:31 PM  

js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.


Laughing at idiots that cry about secession cause Obama won is not remotely the same as crying about secession because Obama won.

I swear, this week has produced the most idiotic "bot sides are bad" comments in the history of ever.
 
2012-11-11 04:38:03 PM  
Morons. So much for "democracy" in their eyes.
 
2012-11-11 04:38:18 PM  
Any dumbass can set up a petition at whitehouse.gov.

/That makes it easier for the Secret Service to keep track of them.
//Dumbasses.
 
2012-11-11 04:38:26 PM  
Oh on, an online petition. I hope that they don't create a FB group also.
 
2012-11-11 04:39:00 PM  

js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.


You know what nation was founded by "just a few crackpots", as you put it?

That's right. Australia.
 
2012-11-11 04:39:06 PM  
FTFA- Texas was the next State to follow by a Micah H. from Arlington, Texas.
Looks like Skinnyhead's movin on up in the world!
 
2012-11-11 04:40:23 PM  

Smackledorfer: OPEN YOUR EYES to Agenda 21.


Ahhh, yes, Agenda 21. I forget, is that the Gay Agenda or the Atheist Agenda?
 
2012-11-11 04:40:36 PM  
www.globalnerdy.com 

I hope they keep it up, though. I want the right to keep working themselves into a froth and go even further into Wackyland.
 
2012-11-11 04:40:55 PM  
What kind of pansy asks to leave? Hoist your flag and be off with you if you've got the balls for it, otherwise shut your pie hole.
 
2012-11-11 04:41:16 PM  

theorellior: Smackledorfer: OPEN YOUR EYES to Agenda 21.

Ahhh, yes, Agenda 21. I forget, is that the Gay Agenda or the Atheist Agenda?


It's the Gay Atheist Socialist Nazi Muslim Agenda.
 
2012-11-11 04:41:43 PM  
So, I guess New York and New Jersey can clean up that hurricane damage all on their own then? Same for Louisiana. Florida and Georgia got that too, I'm sure. They'll just take insurance against potential hazard, and the sweet market will beg them to make contracts, because they'll be so viable as nation states...
 
2012-11-11 04:41:59 PM  
If they want to leave, let them leave if they can figure out a practical non-violent way to do it. No more talk of treason, sedition, or other such crap (sedition should never be a crime). The will of the people should be followed and lets figure out how to do it constitutionally afterwards. This applies equally to Scotland, Catalonia, and, conversely, the Falklands.

Now, the more interesting question is, how can we guarantee in practice the rights of people in these seceding states that want to stay in the Union? We don't want another epic Greece-Turkey, East Prussia/Bohemia-Germany, India-Pakistan migration that results in millions of deaths.
 
2012-11-11 04:42:03 PM  

blastoh: OtherLittleGuy: Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.

Naaa, Just have Obama declare that since they are no longer willing to be part of the nation, we can no longer trust them enough to place military bases there.
So, for example, we are closing down Fort Bragg in Texas and moving it to some other more reasonable state. .


Bragg is in North Carolina, fwiw.
 
2012-11-11 04:42:11 PM  

randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


There are only moderate Democrats these days.
 
2012-11-11 04:42:52 PM  

bulldg4life: js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.

Laughing at idiots that cry about secession cause Obama won is not remotely the same as crying about secession because Obama won.

I swear, this week has produced the most idiotic "bot sides are bad" comments in the history of ever.


Yeah cheering for states to leave the country? That's not both sides are bad, that's both sides are stupid. If you think your state should leave the union, you're an idiot. If you actually think it would be a good thing for states to leave the union, you're an idiot, too.
 
2012-11-11 04:43:32 PM  

eddiesocket: randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.

There are only moderate Democrats these days.


That's not true. There are moderate Democrats, centrist Democrats, conservative Democrats and Democrats That Are Actually Republicans. They have a big tent!
 
2012-11-11 04:43:45 PM  
What happens when every state has a petition? Do people think every state can function as it's own country? Do they think that Obama would be automatically impeached? The derp is just too much.
 
2012-11-11 04:44:19 PM  

A Dark Evil Omen: It's the Gay Atheist Socialist Nazi Muslim Agenda.


And the Fascist Agenda? Is that #22? How about the Arugula Agenda?
 
2012-11-11 04:45:39 PM  

Curse of the Goth Kids: What kind of pansy asks to leave? Hoist your flag and be off with you if you've got the balls for it, otherwise shut your pie hole.


I might add: the founders of this country did not send King George a Request For Independence. On the other hand, neither were they blubbering, self-entitled hoveround diabetics.
 
2012-11-11 04:45:53 PM  
I turned off NoScript temporarily to read the comments out of a perverse curiosity.

I'm sad now. That there's some nuclear grade weaponized Derp.
 
2012-11-11 04:48:43 PM  

Curse of the Goth Kids: Curse of the Goth Kids: What kind of pansy asks to leave? Hoist your flag and be off with you if you've got the balls for it, otherwise shut your pie hole.

I might add: the founders of this country did not send King George a Request For Independence. On the other hand, neither were they blubbering, self-entitled hoveround diabetics.


You have to wonder how these new nation states will handle their own medical care. And banking. And bringing in food, with their new currency. Revenue generation should be interesting, because I guess they won't have any taxes in their new Promised Land...
 
2012-11-11 04:49:19 PM  
"New York, 169."

There's more people than that living in a single apartment house in NYC.
 
2012-11-11 04:49:47 PM  
It's not secession when a few hundred racist yokel shiatbags pass a petition around the klan meeting.
 
2012-11-11 04:50:26 PM  

A Dark Evil Omen: theorellior: Smackledorfer: OPEN YOUR EYES to Agenda 21.

Ahhh, yes, Agenda 21. I forget, is that the Gay Agenda or the Atheist Agenda?

It's the Gay Atheist Socialist Nazi Muslim Agenda.


You're both right. Of course the libitards and blue-beaniers are masking their real intent behind the farcical claim:

"Agenda 21, the Rio Declaration on Environment and Development, and the Statement of principles for the Sustainable Management of Forests were adopted by more than 178 Governments at the United Nations Conference on Environment and Development (UNCED) held in Rio de Janerio, Brazil, 3 to 14 June 1992."
 
2012-11-11 04:51:10 PM  

bulldg4life: Every last person connected to that is a goddamn idiot that should be punched in the face for being a pissy whiny baby for losing an election to the black liberal


pauloflaherty.com
 
2012-11-11 04:51:31 PM  

crab66: It's not secession when a few hundred racist yokel shiatbags pass a petition around the klan meeting.


And it keeps them busy and visible, so I guess that's good.
 
2012-11-11 04:51:59 PM  
I love the idiot(s) in the comments who said the Civil War wasn't about slavery.

If there is a bigger myth hoisted upon the American people about its own history, I can't think of one.

That Lost Cause movement that started before the Confederate guns even went silent sure was effective, it made it so that centuries later, nobody even bothers to read contemporary things like newspaper articles, political statements, Confederate constitutions, or even secession documents.

(Yes "state's rights." The state's right was slavery.)
 
2012-11-11 04:52:11 PM  

theorellior: Smackledorfer: OPEN YOUR EYES to Agenda 21.

Ahhh, yes, Agenda 21. I forget, is that the Gay Agenda or the Atheist Agenda?


I actually have no clue and thought googling it might depress.
 
2012-11-11 04:52:30 PM  
Zero states have filed to secede, and zero will. That was settled a ways back. Movealong.
 
2012-11-11 04:53:04 PM  
And while I figure that some folks imagine their new nations will inherit military bases, I don't think that the US is going to give up Fort Hood. Or even Fort Bliss. They might give Polk to Louisiana just to be rid of it...
 
2012-11-11 04:53:42 PM  
So the northeast can keep its federal tax dollars now instead of sending them to the Midwest and south? I'm okay with this.
 
2012-11-11 04:56:12 PM  
A basic understanding of United States civics and government does not seem to be in the wheelhouse of these "patriots".

It is kind of like all of the "patriots" claiming voting fraud issues while refusing to blame their secretaries of state who would be the ones responsible for any issues related to voting in their states.
 
2012-11-11 04:58:25 PM  
Weaver95 2012-11-11 04:37:17 PM

I can't speak for anyone else here but...I gotta be honest. some days I find it very difficult to tell the tea party from the UFO nutballs and 'sovereign state' wackos.

Weav, there's no difference.

The teabaggers have finally left the building of Perfectly Legitimate Complaint and screwed their wits into the same psychological power socket the UFO nuts did years ago. Different obsession-targets, that's all.

They want to separate themselves from the thundering herd of Wonderbread out there BECAUSE SPECIAL, and by gosh if they didn't pick an especially petulant and annoying way to attention-whore.

That's my half-ass conclusion and I guess I'll stick to it until I get better info.
 
2012-11-11 05:00:14 PM  

quickdraw: Poor things. So brainwashedless. Bless their hearts.


Bless their hearts.
 
2012-11-11 05:00:51 PM  
The FOX news cream isn't helping!
 
2012-11-11 05:01:09 PM  

js34603: bulldg4life: js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.

Laughing at idiots that cry about secession cause Obama won is not remotely the same as crying about secession because Obama won.

I swear, this week has produced the most idiotic "bot sides are bad" comments in the history of ever.

Yeah cheering for states to leave the country? That's not both sides are bad, that's both sides are stupid. If you think your state should leave the union, you're an idiot. If you actually think it would be a good thing for states to leave the union, you're an idiot, too.


Laughing at idiots =/= cheering states to leave the country.

Reading is hard :(
 
2012-11-11 05:01:17 PM  
For those who went off half cocked, you do realize that new york/new jersey are on that list.

/that doesn't fit with the straw man
//at least straw men keep liberals fingers in shape.
 
2012-11-11 05:01:25 PM  

js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.


Wasn't that last one successful?
 
2012-11-11 05:01:25 PM  
"I'm a real American! We should secede! Imagine how awesome it would be! We would have more room for activities!"
"The electoral system that got my favored candidate in office the last time is now a complete failure!"

I imagine that these are typical thoughts for these secessionist loons, or perhaps the most advance thinking for which they are capable, but their failure to see the illogical conclusion is disturbing. I'm wondering if we have made it too easy for idiots to elevate their message beyond simply griping to a neighbor, or if it's a failure of our current educational system to instill an understanding of the federal government's role.
 
2012-11-11 05:01:31 PM  
So, i don't recall the 475 Georgians who've signed that petition ever checking with the other 9,814,735 of us as to our opinion on the issue...

(The one good thing about the insane population growth and urban sprawl in Atlanta over the 32 years I've lived here is that it's starting to edge up the voting numbers into the blue enough to balance the crazy, crazy red in the rest of the state...2016 swing state, maybe? or if not, then 2020?)
 
2012-11-11 05:01:38 PM  
Or, ya know, BECUZZ JEZUSS or sumpin.

/hiccup
 
2012-11-11 05:02:36 PM  

jayhawk88: These citizen generated petitions...

Did they also request naked pictures of Bea Aurthur?


Here... let me help

imageshack.us
 
2012-11-11 05:03:02 PM  
Those petitions are a great place to look for the names of Traitors.
 
2012-11-11 05:03:52 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-11 05:04:19 PM  
someone should make a petition to ask the white house to remove the secession petitions.

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-11-11 05:04:31 PM  

firesign: So, i don't recall the 475 Georgians who've signed that petition ever checking with the other 9,814,735 of us as to our opinion on the issue...

(The one good thing about the insane population growth and urban sprawl in Atlanta over the 32 years I've lived here is that it's starting to edge up the voting numbers into the blue enough to balance the crazy, crazy red in the rest of the state...2016 swing state, maybe? or if not, then 2020?)


Sorry. Those are the breaks. Can't fight a petition.
 
2012-11-11 05:05:01 PM  

skipjack: For those who went off half cocked, you do realize that new york/new jersey are on that list.

/that doesn't fit with the straw man
//at least straw men keep liberals fingers in shape.


You mean the folks who quoted said article? Or did you have a point in there somewhere that just missed actually being put in the form of full sentence that actually made sense?
 
2012-11-11 05:05:49 PM  

KarmicDisaster: Those petitions are a great place to look for the names of Traitors.



Not really. I'm signing the ones for the states I want to get rid of.
 
2012-11-11 05:06:03 PM  

Wyalt Derp: js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

Wasn't that last one successful?


Uhhh yeah.
I got a keg of it on tap in my basement....

The site is good for raising awareness, nothing more. Its not going to change anyones idea, but can give public pressure to something that the government thought no-one cared about.
 
2012-11-11 05:06:55 PM  

hubiestubert: As of 12:46 am, Sunday, signatures obtained by Louisiana, 7,358; Texas, 3,771; Florida, 636; Georgia, 475; Alabama, 834; North Carolina, 792; Kentucky, 467; Mississippi, 475; Indiana, 449; North Dakota, 162; Montana, 440; Colorado, 324; Oregon, 328; New Jersey, 301 and New York, 169. Many more States are expected to follow.


Meanwhile, the Save City of Heroes petition is currently at over 21,000 signatures. I'm still amused.
 
2012-11-11 05:08:52 PM  

rthanu: KarmicDisaster: Those petitions are a great place to look for the names of Traitors.


Not really. I'm signing the ones for the states I want to get rid of.


Yep.
 
2012-11-11 05:09:28 PM  
www.strongtowns.org

DO IT WE COULD USE THE MONEY YOU farkING FREELOADERS
 
2012-11-11 05:10:19 PM  

hubiestubert:

You mean the folks who quoted said article? Or did you have a point in there somewhere that just missed actually being put in the form of full sentence that actually made sense?


I made the point I intended to.
 
2012-11-11 05:11:09 PM  

Im_Gumby: jayhawk88: These citizen generated petitions...

Did they also request naked pictures of Bea Aurthur?

Here... let me help

[imageshack.us image 358x462]


Do you have the un-Photoshopped version?
 
2012-11-11 05:11:37 PM  

randomjsa: They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


Good point. The Democrats have occupied the right wing part position and Republicans aren't going to become more liberal so they were forced into the fascist sphere.
I too wish the Democrats would move to the left randomsja, thank you for your intelligent observation.
 
2012-11-11 05:12:02 PM  
They could buy me and those who don't want out of the USA out of our property.

I'd happily give a few of these assholes some lead poisoning.

/ITG
 
2012-11-11 05:12:02 PM  
Centuries from now, whatever people are using for an encylopedia will record all of this as the most retarded circumstances under which any nation in the history of the world ever fell into civil war.
 
2012-11-11 05:12:10 PM  
So, what happens when these kooks get enough signatures to put it to a vote?

A call for counties to secede from their states that defeated the measure? A call for towns to leave their counties? For houses to form their own sovereign nations?

www.unrealcotton.com
 
2012-11-11 05:12:29 PM  
Nothing to see here but private citizen temper tantrums. It's gonna be a long walk down from the top of bullshiat mountain.
 
2012-11-11 05:12:33 PM  
Wow just look at all that patriotism pouring out of them.
 
2012-11-11 05:12:33 PM  
All these states realize that they need to take their share of the debt with them?
 
2012-11-11 05:13:27 PM  

404 page not found: js34603: bulldg4life: js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.

Laughing at idiots that cry about secession cause Obama won is not remotely the same as crying about secession because Obama won.

I swear, this week has produced the most idiotic "bot sides are bad" comments in the history of ever.

Yeah cheering for states to leave the country? That's not both sides are bad, that's both sides are stupid. If you think your state should leave the union, you're an idiot. If you actually think it would be a good thing for states to leave the union, you're an idiot, too.

Laughing at idiots =/= cheering states to leave the country.

Reading is hard :(


Must be since the headline writer failed at it and is pretending the "states" filed for secession instead of random nutjobs starting a petition.

Seems to be hard for you too since you've missed all the people saying "we'll bye" and "do it" based on the stupid headline, and think you're all just having a good laugh at idiots.
 
2012-11-11 05:14:05 PM  

skipjack: hubiestubert:

You mean the folks who quoted said article? Or did you have a point in there somewhere that just missed actually being put in the form of full sentence that actually made sense?

I made the point I intended to.


That you lacked anything constructive to contribute? You do a marvelous job of that already. Keep it up. You are a master of irrelevancy...
 
2012-11-11 05:14:11 PM  
...it is practically feasible for Texas to withdraw from the union, and to do so would protect it's citizens' standard of living...

gorzek.com
 
2012-11-11 05:14:44 PM  
Did this happen in 2004? I heard that Dems reacted the same.
 
2012-11-11 05:16:15 PM  

meat0918: Morons. So much for "democracy" in their eyes.


This. What a bunch of dumbasses
 
2012-11-11 05:16:36 PM  
Boehner says republicans need to get to work on finding a compromise. Shouldn't you clownservative trolls be working? Get a job.
 
2012-11-11 05:16:54 PM  
lh6.googleusercontent.com
 
2012-11-11 05:19:10 PM  
Get your asses to Somalia.
 
2012-11-11 05:19:33 PM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: Did this happen in 2004? I heard that Dems reacted the same.


Yes in fact I was approached several times by people to sign a petition with regards to bringing back "Space Above and Beyond"
 
2012-11-11 05:19:40 PM  

tdpatriots12: I love the idiot(s) in the comments who said the Civil War wasn't about slavery.

If there is a bigger myth hoisted upon the American people about its own history, I can't think of one.

That Lost Cause movement that started before the Confederate guns even went silent sure was effective, it made it so that centuries later, nobody even bothers to read contemporary things like newspaper articles, political statements, Confederate constitutions, or even secession documents.

(Yes "state's rights." The state's right was slavery.)


I've heard many Southerners claim it was a war over states rights, and envy over their wealth.
Not kidding.
 
2012-11-11 05:20:38 PM  

CPennypacker: [www.strongtowns.org image 800x588]

DO IT WE COULD USE THE MONEY YOU farkING FREELOADERS


Is that picture ever going to get updated? It's been eight years and shiatheads still point to it. I doubt an updated version would be significantly different anyway.
 
2012-11-11 05:20:44 PM  
Nothing to see here. Just self-registration for the Derp List of Butthurt Republicans.

They'll volunteer their names for something like this, which singles them out as revolutionary radicals, but they don't want to register their guns. Do they realize that a government that's going around rounding up guns (which is an insane belief to begin with) won't NEED a gun registration list?

"Oh, this guy is an anti-government blogger who signed a petition to secede and has made numerous posts about shooting guns on message boards, but his name isn't on the gun registration list. He's clean. Next house...."

Derrrrrrrrp.
 
2012-11-11 05:22:04 PM  
wow - all 328 Republicans in Oregon signed the petition.

The butt...it hurts
 
2012-11-11 05:23:23 PM  
Link

Feeling a little snarky today.
 
2012-11-11 05:23:53 PM  

Foxxinnia: CPennypacker: [www.strongtowns.org image 800x588]

DO IT WE COULD USE THE MONEY YOU farkING FREELOADERS

Is that picture ever going to get updated? It's been eight years and shiatheads still point to it. I doubt an updated version would be significantly different anyway.


31, 34, 41, 49 are blue now so its even better
 
2012-11-11 05:24:35 PM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: Did this happen in 2004? I heard that Dems reacted the same.


Yep, sure an' they did. I mean, they must have, right? BOF SIEDS SAEM?
 
2012-11-11 05:24:48 PM  
No...please, god...not PETITIONS!

Link.

Such great Americans...once an election doesn't go their way, they want to piss on the graves of all the TRUE patriots who died so they could be whiny biatches and just leave the United States.

The 101st Keyboarders have a new unit - the Benedict Arnold Brigade.
 
2012-11-11 05:25:01 PM  
From the history books of the future:
In the course of human history, many great nations were birthed from inauspicious beginnings. Nowhere was this more true than the People's Republic of Dumbfarkistan, formerly known as "those southern shiathole states." Thousands of keyboards, working in unison, rose up to protest the unfairness of the democratic election of some black guy, and together produced a governing document coated in the virtual cheeto dust of freedom, liberty, and sore loserism.
 
2012-11-11 05:25:20 PM  
All cited patriotism and a deeply felt love of country as key reasons to secede.
 
2012-11-11 05:25:42 PM  

Bill O'Reilly ... voters - like blacks, Hispanics and women - "feel they are entitled to things." ...


Yeah, these Republicans don't feel they are entitled to their America.
 
2012-11-11 05:25:46 PM  
i felt sorry for myself living in the state i do. now, seeing it in that list, someone shoot me for i have lost faith in all breathing things (except my dog and cat, the only things that are not a waste of oxegen)
 
2012-11-11 05:27:57 PM  
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-11 05:28:01 PM  
I know reposting things from personal blogs is pretty lame but whatever, it's on topic and I'm too lazy to reword the same point into a new post:

The biggest problem with a certain subset of the right-wing backlash to the re-election of President Obama is the utter contempt it shows for the rule of law, the very thing they claim is being destroyed in a country they clearly do not understand or truly appreciate.

The rule of law is, by and large, something that Americans have historically cared about a great deal. Sometimes, this was to the country's detriment, as I'll demonstrate in a minute. A big issue with the republic in the first place was the very real doubt that people would respect the authority of law, instead of the obligations of personal allegiance or the authority of military power. It was all fairly astonishing to the world, if not the country itself, that it actually worked, and Americans justly took pride in it.

Even when the course of the nation didn't agree with their principles.

That attitude led to, for example, the consensus in the early-mid 19th century that there was no legal method for depriving slave owners of their property in slaves without slave owners' and/or their state's consent. This belief was even held by radical abolitionists, save extremely rare exceptions like John Brown. It also led to the near-universal public outcry in the North as the Confederate States seceded, violating the principle that held the rule of law - and thus, the election of Abraham Lincoln - sacred. When the South violated that trust, it cracked open the door to Emancipation, and a vengeful North kicked it in without remorse. It was, at the time, as much about teaching the South a lesson in democracy as it was about human rights.

Now, in a far less divisive climate with much lower stakes - as bad as things can seem, millions of people are not born into a lifetime of brutal bondage in this country anymore, for one thing - some conservatives are reacting to the perfectly legal re-election of a sitting President whose views they do not share by claiming that the results are not legitimate, advocating secession and/or rebellion, making all sorts of threats about "going Galt," and screaming to anyone within earshot about how the "commie socialist fascist Muslim Kenyan abortionist dictator" isn't even in charge of a republic anymore because they didn't get their way.

These people have some concept of what the U.S. Constitution is that can best be described as, "whatever they imagine it is, as long as it agrees with my political proto-philosophy." The problem is what the Constitution is actually for: Establishing the functional rules and ultimate authority of the law.

It probably sounds quaint to argue that the United States is a country ruled by law, but it's something these people have either forgotten or never understood. This attitude is contemptuous of both the country they claim to love - but evidently never truly got to know - and the rest of the electorate that exercised their Constitutional privilege to vote their conscience.

In short, petulant whining followed by extra-legal threats in the wake of an election is not patriotic, and historically speaking is about the most un-American thing you can do.
 
2012-11-11 05:28:51 PM  

I Like Bread: Im_Gumby: jayhawk88: These citizen generated petitions...

Did they also request naked pictures of Bea Aurthur?

Here... let me help

[imageshack.us image 358x462]

Do you have the un-Photoshopped version?


Sure do:

www.waldenfans.com
 
2012-11-11 05:28:55 PM  

Weaver95: randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.

when the GOP kicked out all their moderates, where do you think a lot of them ended up? sure, some went to the libertarians...but even more went Democrat.


Well, there's your problem.
 
2012-11-11 05:29:37 PM  
All hail the Republic of Derpistan!
 
2012-11-11 05:34:15 PM  

randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


As was already said, hurr.
 
2012-11-11 05:34:19 PM  
Can we get some money together and send each person who signed that petition an I-AM-A-BIG-OL'-CRYBABY tee shirt? I hate to imagine how these folks would have behaved if the Gore v. Bush situation had occurred this time with Romney as Gore and Obama as Bush.
 
2012-11-11 05:35:40 PM  

randomjsa: Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


Ginnungagap42:
So you're saying that you believe the Democrats should shift to the left?


That's correct, but we all know that's not what randomtard meant.
 
2012-11-11 05:36:12 PM  
I love my state (Texas), and I think Houston is incredibly underrated. Massive amount of cultural diversity, learning, arts, good people, great food.

The direction my state has been going, I am not against moving. I have lived here my entire life, and consider myself Texan, through and through. That said, I think I need to be in a state that wants to go in a direction I believe in, where education is not politicized, where the working poor are not marginalized, where people care about the glory of their natural world, and want to preserve it.

I wish for better for my state. It causes me anguish.
 
2012-11-11 05:40:08 PM  
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-11 05:41:06 PM  
But remember, it's the liberals that are anti-American.
 
2012-11-11 05:41:22 PM  
What would you redneck peckerwoods have done in WII if you won the Civil War?
 
2012-11-11 05:42:40 PM  

deeyablo: I love my state (Texas), and I think Houston is incredibly underrated. Massive amount of cultural diversity, learning, arts, good people, great food.

The direction my state has been going, I am not against moving. I have lived here my entire life, and consider myself Texan, through and through. That said, I think I need to be in a state that wants to go in a direction I believe in, where education is not politicized, where the working poor are not marginalized, where people care about the glory of their natural world, and want to preserve it.

I wish for better for my state. It causes me anguish.


Houston is a great place to leave.

/went to college there, then went to Alaska to get as far away from there as I could.
 
2012-11-11 05:43:01 PM  
Can we also petition to kick some states out?
 
2012-11-11 05:45:11 PM  

SilentStrider: Arthur Jumbles: Some random idiot sends off a letter. Wake me up when it's the governor and senators making the request.

At this point, wouldn't surprise me if that was in the works.


It would surprise me if someone serious was doing it. But yeah, we have had "token" petitions and speeches from governors and senators, like Rick Perry.

Oh wait, he walked that back with, "I never said we should, just that we could in a conversation about Obama's America is evil soshulism." Because Rick Perry is a pussy as well as a jackass.
 
2012-11-11 05:46:03 PM  
i280.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-11 05:47:27 PM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: sithon: sedition ? treason ? should people be arrested now.

And all because the Black Guy won.


This. Sadly this.
 
2012-11-11 05:47:41 PM  
www.cdsporch.org
 
2012-11-11 05:49:54 PM  
These citizen generated petitions were filed just days after the 2012 Presidential election.

Has anyone else noticed that almost every single one of these "x state wants to succeed" is a couple random jackoffs that have no power or elected office in the state, usually on the political equivalent of an anonymized internet message board? aka trolls?

What is it with the big media conglomerates and feeding the trolls?

//The only time it was actual news was when Rick Perry settled it, and he backpedaled so hard that a video of the event fell through time and was used in Superman II.
 
2012-11-11 05:50:14 PM  
The Examiner could solve the huge trillion dollar deficit by just writing a check. And the potatoes coming out of its ass could end world hunger.

//fake "paper" that appears only around election cycles
 
2012-11-11 05:51:04 PM  
Republicans ran against a Kenyan, Muslim, Communist, Socialist, Radical Negroid.

And they lost.

i165.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-11 05:52:05 PM  
Louisians and Texas would be ok. A lot of the rest not so much. Oil and all of that. Oh and Duck calls.
 
2012-11-11 05:54:17 PM  
Texas by itself would be little bit less important than Canada. Those others especially landlocked ones would quickly be forgotten.
 
kab
2012-11-11 05:57:33 PM  
I love how Texas, who typically has it's hand out more than any other state for 'disasters', who goes to the fed just to make their state education budgets (while not asking their own population to cover the bill), still plays the secede card.

So yeah...
fireden.net
 
2012-11-11 05:58:44 PM  
What, no petition from Idaho? I would have thought that there'd be at least one wingnut who has internet access and realizes that they haven't already seceded.
 
2012-11-11 05:59:12 PM  

hubiestubert: Good luck with that.

Call me when this gets past the "Crank with a keyboard firing off letters" stage. You know, when legislators and Governors are making these sorts of calls. Folks certainly have the right to mutter and natter on, but if they're going to rely on militias to get 'er done, they might want to reconsider.

FTFA:

As of 12:46 am, Sunday, signatures obtained by Louisiana, 7,358; Texas, 3,771; Florida, 636; Georgia, 475; Alabama, 834; North Carolina, 792; Kentucky, 467; Mississippi, 475; Indiana, 449; North Dakota, 162; Montana, 440; Colorado, 324; Oregon, 328; New Jersey, 301 and New York, 169. Many more States are expected to follow.

Interesting to note that Arizona and Nevada aren't on that list. Then again, they sort of rely on Hoover Dam to make their communities actually viable...


Hey! THEY built that!
 
2012-11-11 06:01:34 PM  
I think another William Sherman style approach to the southern states would be beneficial for keeping the union intact.
 
2012-11-11 06:03:58 PM  
On my phone so I can't do it, but can someone do a petition to the WH to start a culture immersion program to send anti-government, secessionist folks to Somalia?
 
2012-11-11 06:07:17 PM  

Weaver95: I gotta be honest. some days I find it very difficult to tell the tea party from the UFO nutballs


It's simple - one group clings to their oddball obsessions and delusions and doesn't understand why the rest of society won't wake up, see the truth, and accept that they're right, and the other group believes in flying saucers.
 
2012-11-11 06:08:42 PM  
I'd like to point out that Obama got 46% of the popular vote from GA.
 
2012-11-11 06:10:18 PM  
I love the way the derp brigade in the comments section think the U.S. military is "their" army.
 
2012-11-11 06:12:46 PM  
Limbaugh was recently musing about a fabulous world in which America was physically split 50/50 between the major political parties.

The theory being the "moocher class" ensconced in the "blue" states would have no more struggling atlas' to leech off of - prompting imminent collapse.

Wouldn't the millions of elderly, white, Medicare and social security recipients that consistently vote republican be on the debit side of the ledger in red states in that case?
 
2012-11-11 06:15:08 PM  

OneBrightMonkey: Limbaugh was recently musing about a fabulous world in which America was physically split 50/50 between the major political parties.

The theory being the "moocher class" ensconced in the "blue" states would have no more struggling atlas' to leech off of - prompting imminent collapse.

Wouldn't the millions of elderly, white, Medicare and social security recipients that consistently vote republican be on the debit side of the ledger in red states in that case?


The red states would be apocalyptic wastelands of decrepit old people and redneck high school dropouts. But, really, it's Rush, what exactly do you expect?
 
2012-11-11 06:15:43 PM  

shastacola: I love the way the derp brigade in the comments section think the U.S. military is "their" army.


"I, _____, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God." (Title 10, US Code; Act of 5 May 1960 replacing the wording first adopted in 1789, with amendment effective 5 October 1962).

"I, _____ (SSAN), having been appointed an officer in the Army of the United States, as indicated above in the grade of _____ do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic, that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office upon which I am about to enter; So help me God." (DA Form 71, 1 August 1959, for officers.)


We wouldn't want our servicemen and servicewomen to break an oath before God, would we?
 
2012-11-11 06:17:41 PM  

globalwarmingpraiser: Louisians and Texas would be ok. A lot of the rest not so much. Oil and all of that. Oh and Duck calls.


Oil and the biggest industrial shipping ports on the Gulf and, really, the East Coast. Houston, especially, is kind of the LA of the East.

Of course, that's also why no one has ever seriously suggested seceding (note that these stories have to actually go looking for these nutters, not the other way around), a border with tarriffs up north and the lack of an FTA to the south (since that comes from the US) would hurt both the state and the US a lot more than it would help either. In the end, it's money that makes these kinds of decisions, and every single financial factor is firmly on the side of not being a retard. The US has made basically every single state of the union immensely richer than it would have been otherwise.

Yes, even the agricultural, shipping, and mining states. The high incomes that urban states hold up as evidence that their greater contribution to the group don't exist without the raw materials, shipping, and manufacturing coming through and from the rural states, and life in the rural states isn't very pleasant without the easy access to consumer goods from the urban areas. 's called hinterlands, biatches.
 
2012-11-11 06:19:29 PM  

BlippityBleep: oh gawd let oregon go. pleasepleasepleaseplease!


FREEMYPEOPLE! FREEMYPEOPLE!
 
2012-11-11 06:21:16 PM  
It's a little early for that.
 
2012-11-11 06:24:10 PM  

Forbidden Doughnut: Sock Ruh Tease: It isn't even about north and south. This is just urban vs. rural now. That's the reason states like Oregon, New Jersey and New York are in that list. Because stupid hicks in rural areas are similar on either side of the Mason-Dixon line.

I live in (semi) rural Oregon. I can vouch for this.

/ it gets even derpier in the southern part of the State, and in the east...


Cascadia will exclude those areas, and everyone will be happier for it.
 
2012-11-11 06:26:21 PM  

machodonkeywrestler: I'd like to point out that Obama got 46% of the popular vote from GA.


That's what sucks about the electoral college. Not every part of Georgia are shiat kicking hicks and Florida for example is like three different countries.
 
2012-11-11 06:27:51 PM  

SamFlagg: I'm going to have to point out that reporting on this level of derpitude in such a manner as to indicate that the "states" themselves are filing is proooooooobably contributing to the overall level of stupid in terms of understanding how government functions.


We are approaching a singularity of stupid.
 
2012-11-11 06:31:07 PM  
Secession has been tried.
Plus, we have a military that is freshly trained in COIN and hostile occupation from the last decade of festivities in the various sand boxes.

Bring it, derpers. We need the jobs.
 
2012-11-11 06:34:14 PM  

Mugato: machodonkeywrestler: I'd like to point out that Obama got 46% of the popular vote from GA.

That's what sucks about the electoral college. Not every part of Georgia are shiat kicking hicks and Florida for example is like three different countries.


States could easily pass laws that gave the Electoral votes by district, they just have no incentive to do so. Many states are not all or none for EV's
 
2012-11-11 06:36:34 PM  
Hows about self deportation?
 
2012-11-11 06:37:26 PM  
OneBrightMonkey 2012-11-11 06:12:46 PM

Limbaugh was recently musing about a fabulous world in which America was physically split 50/50 between the major political parties.

The theory being the "moocher class" ensconced in the "blue" states would have no more struggling atlas' to leech off of - prompting imminent collapse.

Wouldn't the millions of elderly, white, Medicare and social security recipients that consistently vote republican be on the debit side of the ledger in red states in that case?


YUP.

I keep dammit TELLING you guys, these 'Publicans WANT to quite literally cut off and kill large portions of their voter base.

Not metaphorically, either.
 
2012-11-11 06:39:13 PM  

Generation_D: And then my quality of life drops because I have to support rounding them up and shooting them like the swine they are. And that sucks, there's so much better uses for that money.


And yet, rounding them up and shooting them proactively makes THEM the victims.
 
2012-11-11 06:39:21 PM  

born_yesterday: js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.

You know what nation was founded by "just a few crackpots", as you put it?

That's right. Australia.


After starting as a British prison It was actually formed by mass immigration just like the USA. Luckily for Australia relatively few of the immigrants were overly religious.
 
2012-11-11 06:39:29 PM  

Princess Ryans Knickers: Can't wait for my taxes to drop from the southern states no longer mooching off the other states!


CPennypacker: [www.strongtowns.org image 800x588]

DO IT WE COULD USE THE MONEY YOU farkING FREELOADERS


What they both (and that chart) said.
 
2012-11-11 06:39:47 PM  

Arthur Jumbles: Some random idiot sends off a letter. Wake me up when it's the governor and senators making the request.


This.

FTA: As of 12:46 am, Sunday, signatures obtained by Louisiana, 7,358; Texas, 3,771; Florida, 636; Georgia, 475; Alabama, 834; North Carolina, 792; Kentucky, 467; Mississippi, 475; Indiana, 449; North Dakota, 162; Montana, 440; Colorado, 324; Oregon, 328; New Jersey, 301 and New York, 169 (??).

Why is this even news?
 
2012-11-11 06:39:50 PM  

YouAreItNoTagBacks: No one's done this yet?

theelephantgun.files.wordpress.com

That should be the entire thread.
 
2012-11-11 06:42:53 PM  

Sock Ruh Tease: Because stupid hicks in rural areas are similar on either side of the Mason-Dixon line.


While there's some superficial similarities, the ones to the south of it thump their Bibles a LOT harder.

hubiestubert: Call me when this gets past the "Crank with a keyboard firing off letters" stage.


Specifically, re-greenlight when one of them passes the 25k signature threshold that gets official response.
 
2012-11-11 06:47:42 PM  
And if these states secede, all of the medicare and social security that some of their citizens collect will go away.

I don't think they've thought this plan all the way to.
 
2012-11-11 06:49:28 PM  

HotIgneous Intruder: blastoh: OtherLittleGuy: Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.

Naaa, Just have Obama declare that since they are no longer willing to be part of the nation, we can no longer trust them enough to place military bases there.
So, for example, we are closing down Fort Bragg in Texas and moving it to some other more reasonable state. .

Bragg is in North Carolina, fwiw.


Bragg, Hood, whatever...
 
2012-11-11 06:50:03 PM  
Not that it's going to happen, but I wonder what would happen to those of us who were born in those states but no longer live in them.
 
2012-11-11 06:53:20 PM  

kab: I love how Texas, who typically has it's hand out more than any other state for 'disasters', who goes to the fed just to make their state education budgets (while not asking their own population to cover the bill), still plays the secede card.

So yeah...
[fireden.net image 348x355]


That assessment is about as accurate as Fox News' assessment of the Obama administration. No offense.

Texas had its hand out recently due to the wildfires, but that was once and not much more than any other state facing major disasters. I can't think of any other disasters we (yeah yeah, Texan here) have been begging aid for. The education business was 1 billion that congress was considering withholding despite "owing" it by their regular math.

The problems, of course, are that Texas' massive budget problems are the result of Rick Perry's Republican cronyism and theft, he slashed the fire budget right before the major wildfires, and DURING them as well, because he couldn't fiddle with the numbers and hide all his graft any further. The reason the fed was talking about holding back the money is because Perry already STOLE (oh excuse me, "re-appropriated") billions of dollars from the education budget for the same reason he slashed the fire budget.

Finally, Texas is, shockingly, a donor state (check red state socialism, it's on there) but the reasons are somewhat suspect. First, obviously, Texas has a lot of oil money, and a lot of "Elephant graveyards" where old Republicans go to die. Second, as a major gateway to Mexico Texas has a lot of through traffic that it makes money off of one way or another, in fact secessionists and others fantasize about taxing or cheating more money out of that traffic (see the boondoggle that was the TTC). Finally did I mention oil money? I didn't just mean local pumping, much of the oil Venezuela produces gets refined on Texas' section of the Gulf Coast, and it isn't just Venezuelan oil that shows up here.

The outcome of a Texas secession would be quite complicated, but smart money says it would be bad for everyone.

Certain OTHER states though...yeah.
 
2012-11-11 06:54:53 PM  
Pah. I've signed a bunch of similar petitions, even once contributed to a group who pledged to gather signuratures, and all of them are still part of the US.

The Great Wall of Texas project, a 50' by 50' wall to separate Texass from the rest of the US. it would have been awsome.
 
2012-11-11 06:55:59 PM  
citizen generated petitions
 
2012-11-11 06:56:25 PM  
So... people created nonbinding e-petitions that can be created by any idiot with internet access? Still boring.
 
2012-11-11 06:56:39 PM  

BSABSVR: The states aren't filing, dumbfark.


THAT.
 
2012-11-11 06:56:47 PM  
Cowards.
 
2012-11-11 06:56:55 PM  
FWIW...........

Not that any of these wing-nut glue sniffers every bothered to check, but secession is a lot more complicated than putting up a few EZ-Pass booths at the state line. This particular article was probably written in response to the Bush election fiasco, but just switch the colors and the state names. The rest is academic.

Does the Constitution Permit the Blue States to Secede?
With Permission, Perhaps; Unilaterally, No
(findlaw.com)
By Michael C. Dorf
FindLaw
November 24, 2004
 
2012-11-11 07:00:13 PM  

loveblondieo: Not that it's going to happen, but I wonder what would happen to those of us who were born in those states but no longer live in them.


Well, make sure your birth....(excuse me)..birf certificate is in order should you wish to return....
 
2012-11-11 07:01:35 PM  
content.ytmnd.com

15 states? Wow... looks like we're gonna need some more Ass Cream.
 
2012-11-11 07:02:14 PM  
I was watching this unfold on WND. Apparently, the crazies actually believe this will actually accomplish something more than providing some comedy.

"Oh oh, let's sign this non-binding e-petition so that we can support a cause without actually doing or risking anything!"

Well, I was watching until they banninated me from posting. Too lazy to create another account to continue bugging them.
 
2012-11-11 07:02:36 PM  
Gee, what would we ever do without the South?
 
2012-11-11 07:06:07 PM  

randomjsa: They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


why would they be stimulated to come back by the right wing democratic party moving towards the center?
 
2012-11-11 07:06:53 PM  
I'm not saying this is the same thing, but have you ever stopped to think how many comments similar to the ones in this thread were made by British Loyalists about Patriots, and vice versa, leading up to the American Revolution. Or loyalists to the French monarchy about the lower classes. Or the Northerners about the southerners before the Civil War. Or anytime there is one side against another. Ever in life. SHUT UP!!! NO YOU SHUT UP!!! YOU'RE STUPID!!! NUH UH, YOU'RE STUPID!!! GTFO!! NO I LIKE IT HERE; YOU GTFO!!! HERPDERP!!!
 
2012-11-11 07:07:06 PM  

YouAreItNoTagBacks: Link

Feeling a little snarky today.


Classic.

I hope you get a shiatload more signatures than the radicals. I would sign it myself if I was an American.
 
2012-11-11 07:08:38 PM  

kg2095: YouAreItNoTagBacks: Link

Feeling a little snarky today.

Classic.

I hope you get a shiatload more signatures than the radicals. I would sign it myself if I was an American.


This one's waaaaay better - Link
 
2012-11-11 07:09:42 PM  

sparkeyjames: Wow just look at all that patriotism pouring out of them.


It's staining their pants something fierce.
 
2012-11-11 07:10:32 PM  
In some ways I wish they would just do it. Just go and try it, set off Civil War II: Sherman's Boogaloo. They would lose, very quickly and decisively, and for at least several generations declaring yourself a Republican would be about the same as saying you're a Nazi.

It would be bad, yes, but over quickly and maybe some of the idiots would finally learn that they live in a very sheltered little bubble that in no way reflects the real world. They clearly won't learn any other way.
 
2012-11-11 07:13:37 PM  
The US continues to suffer economic difficulties stemming from the federal government's neglect to reform domestic and foreign spending. The citizens of the US suffer from blatant abuses of their rights such as the NDAA, the TSA, etc. Given that the state of Texas maintains a balanced budget and is the 15th largest economy in the world, it is practically feasible for Texas to withdraw from the union, and to do so would protect it's citizens' standard of living and re-secure their rights and liberties in accordance with the original ideas and beliefs of our founding fathers which are no longer being reflected by the federal government.

A product of the Texas educational system, no doubt.
 
2012-11-11 07:14:00 PM  

js34603: 404 page not found: js34603: bulldg4life: js34603: Before the Well Byes and the air of superiority becomes too overwhelming in here, maybe take a look at the article and realize its random crackpots in these states trying to petition for this on the same Obama site that has featured other such winning petitions as releasing the truth about UFOs and the disclosure of the White House beer recipe.

In other words, crazies gonna crazy. Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.

Laughing at idiots that cry about secession cause Obama won is not remotely the same as crying about secession because Obama won.

I swear, this week has produced the most idiotic "bot sides are bad" comments in the history of ever.

Yeah cheering for states to leave the country? That's not both sides are bad, that's both sides are stupid. If you think your state should leave the union, you're an idiot. If you actually think it would be a good thing for states to leave the union, you're an idiot, too.

Laughing at idiots =/= cheering states to leave the country.

Reading is hard :(

Must be since the headline writer failed at it and is pretending the "states" filed for secession instead of random nutjobs starting a petition.

Seems to be hard for you too since you've missed all the people saying "we'll bye" and "do it" based on the stupid headline, and think you're all just having a good laugh at idiots.


A misleading headline on Fark!? OMG GTFO!

PROTIP: Do NOT click on any link where subby describes a woman as smoking hot. You will be PISSED.
 
2012-11-11 07:15:31 PM  
Good luck with that. The financial powerhouses are all blue states. You'd have massive joblessness immediately, and without a federal safety net you'd have starvation and eventually riots.
 
2012-11-11 07:18:07 PM  

LincolnLogolas: I was watching this unfold on WND. Apparently, the crazies actually believe this will actually accomplish something more than providing some comedy.

"Oh oh, let's sign this non-binding e-petition so that we can support a cause without actually doing or risking anything!"

Well, I was watching until they banninated me from posting. Too lazy to create another account to continue bugging them.


What's this WND site all about?

* logs onto site*

......oh_lawd.jpg....
 
2012-11-11 07:23:23 PM  

Dr. Whoof:
It would be bad, yes, but over quickly and maybe some of the idiots would finally learn that they live in a very sheltered little bubble that in no way reflects the real world. They clearly won't learn any other way.


I doubt they would learn even then. Sometimes stupid is forever.
 
2012-11-11 07:43:57 PM  
15 jackasses are not unexpected.
 
2012-11-11 07:45:09 PM  
Bye.
 
2012-11-11 07:45:10 PM  

HeartBurnKid: [content.ytmnd.com image 426x320]

15 states? Wow... looks like we're gonna need some more Ass Cream.


Ass cream
you scream
we all scream
for Ass Cream.
 
2012-11-11 07:45:27 PM  

Smackledorfer: Laura Pank,"And I think that you are one of those retards that think the welfare state and doing nothing is the answer. I think that you are a disillusioned idiot if you think that things are going to get better from here. OPEN YOUR EYES to the TYRANNY from BOTH PARTIES, OPEN YOUR EYES to Agenda 21. And then, OPEN YOUR EYES and look at the history books and you will see that if we continue on the same path that we will be America "aka China #2" in a few more yests"

Study it out!

I'd like to believe comments like these aren't sincere. I really would.


I've never understood why teatards use random caps so much in their commentary. Are they afraid we'll read it in a monotone if they don't?
 
2012-11-11 07:48:57 PM  
FartBong0 should just have DEVGRU drop in and arrest and detain a handful of folks advocating secession. Then just let them go after video of them pissing themselves and crying like little girls appears on the evening news. Hold a press conf with pics of crying, wet crotched secession advocates over his shoulder and apologize, saying that he thought it as a actual threat to the union, but it turned out that they were just talking out of their asses.
 
2012-11-11 07:51:50 PM  

Jim_Callahan: These citizen generated petitions were filed just days after the 2012 Presidential election.

Has anyone else noticed that almost every single one of these "x state wants to succeed" is a couple random jackoffs that have no power or elected office in the state, usually on the political equivalent of an anonymized internet message board? aka trolls?

What is it with the big media conglomerates and feeding the trolls?

//The only time it was actual news was when Rick Perry settled it, and he backpedaled so hard that a video of the event fell through time and was used in Superman II.


What "big media conglomerate"? The Examiner isn't even a real newspaper, it's a website with articles written by largely unpaid and untrained contributors who do their own editing.
This particular story and headline was written by a psychologist from Texas. I bet she's also a signatory to the petition.
 
2012-11-11 07:53:18 PM  

Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistaken. The Tea Party / Racist / Separatist Right is here to stay, and they won't quit til they get their way, which is their own country run by American Taliban.

And I'd be fine with giving it to them, but the problem is then they would declare war on us probably the next minute.


Why? We'd pull our military out first, and they'd be too busy fighting amongst themselves anyway.

I wonder how many of these modern day secessionists like to rant "Love it or leave it!"?

/thinking of another platitude, one involving doors hitting vs. where one was split
 
2012-11-11 07:54:22 PM  

pacified: don't let the door hit ya
where the good lord split ya.


That'd be the one.
 
2012-11-11 07:55:11 PM  
It's a frakking online petition.
Means nothing as far as an actual movement towards that end.
The author likes to fan fires set by idiots.Makes him look cutting edge.
 
2012-11-11 07:56:20 PM  
Pussies. Man up. Contribute.
 
2012-11-11 07:56:28 PM  

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: vpb: OtherLittleGuy: Bad time, guys. All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home. Even in 15 states, putting down a Second Rebellion should be no trouble.

I think they believe that 99% of the military is good'ol boys who would be on their side.

A) Cite your figure, please.
B) They'd all choose to betray their loyalty to 'Murika?


Be an interesting concept. I'm sure there'd be a few dorks and F.E.A.R. wannabes who would mutiny and side with their states, and a larger number who wouldn't want to fire on US citizens who would opt out as conscientious objectors. The career soldiers probably not so much.

However, anyone wanting to force the issue should recall what happened in Los Angeles during the riots, when the Marines were deployed to keep order. They kept order, all right; and when some fool decided the Marines would never fire on US citizens and decided to crash a roadblock, they shot him dead.
 
2012-11-11 07:56:39 PM  
randomjsa (farkied: "Holy fnck you're an idiot." - Nina_Hartley's_Ass): Generation_D: I think what this says is those of us who have been waiting for a calm, rational, centrist/right Republican party to come back and join the table have been sorely mistake

They'll come back when the moderate Democrats do.


Democrats by and large *are* moderates. Gingrinch, during the primary, called Rmoney a moderate like it's a bad thing.
 
2012-11-11 07:58:41 PM  
I daresay that if Mr. Romney had won, there'd be a few Democrats wondering how THEY might secede, especially as the complete effect of a fully operational Romney Death Star became known.
 
2012-11-11 08:02:16 PM  
"Liberal Schadenfreude is Out of Control: Why gloating after the election is nastier than ever"

THIS is why!
 
2012-11-11 08:07:52 PM  

bootman: FartBong0 should just have DEVGRU drop in and arrest and detain a handful of folks advocating secession. Then just let them go after video of them pissing themselves and crying like little girls appears on the evening news. Hold a press conf with pics of crying, wet crotched secession advocates over his shoulder and apologize, saying that he thought it as a actual threat to the union, but it turned out that they were just talking out of their asses.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poe's_law
 
2012-11-11 08:08:54 PM  
Not everyone voting for secession is racist. I signed the petition to get rid of Mississippi and Florida. I think it's a sign of patriotism.
 
2012-11-11 08:13:43 PM  

Nemosomen: Not everyone voting for secession is racist. I signed the petition to get rid of Mississippi and Florida. I think it's a sign of patriotism.


Interesting. I wonder if, say, the people of /b/ feel that way too.
 
2012-11-11 08:19:24 PM  

kg2095: After starting as a British prison It was actually formed by mass immigration just like the USA. Luckily for Australia relatively few of the immigrants were overly religious.


What does it say that, when faced with the choice of immigrating to a country filled with religious nuts or a prison colony, so many felt that the prison was a wiser choice?
 
2012-11-11 08:23:56 PM  

TV's Vinnie: More like cranky hillbillies in 15 states want to waste the taxpayer's time & money because Rmoney's defeat gave them epic amounts of butthurt, and drama-queens gotta drama-queen.


This. the states did not file these petitions, if they were going to do something like this they have far more effective methods to use.
 
2012-11-11 08:25:38 PM  
*Shug* Maybe its grand experiment know as the United States is over. I feel bad for many of the red flyover states: they got nothing.

sandiegofreepress.org

/In a Absolutely GOP World
 
2012-11-11 08:32:12 PM  
This is a false choice. No state is or will secede. Sorry.
 
2012-11-11 08:34:53 PM  
Not even the state that took a week longer to count than Alabama or Mississippi?
 
2012-11-11 08:34:55 PM  
Did anyone cover the fact that it's a collection of disgruntled morons, and not the state governments themselves, signing these petitions, and that these petitions are utterly pointless except as a possible way for media outlets to feed on the last crumbs at the "Obama kicked Romney's ass" table?

Yes? Ah, well, then. Keep at it.
 
2012-11-11 08:36:46 PM  

Gyrfalcon:

However, anyone wanting to force the issue should recall what happened in Los Angeles during the riots, when the Marines were deployed to keep order. They kept order, all right; and when some fool decided the Marines would never fire on US citizens and decided to crash a roadblock, they shot him dead.


National Guardsman, actually.
 
2012-11-11 08:39:46 PM  
Ok, fine, pay back the Federal Government ALL the money your state owes up to this point. THEN, you'll need to get the agreement of ALL residents. Right now, there are high schools in New York city with more students than this stupid petition has signatures. Once they all leave, they'll have to pick a new name, Th USA is taken.

It should also be noted: Everyone signing this is committing treason against The United States Of America. Enjoy your prison time, secessionists.
 
2012-11-11 08:43:57 PM  
I wonder what the population of non-Whites is in each of those states....
I wonder if those online petitions truly represent the best interests of those states...
I wonder if you took all Fed funding away what the quality of life for most of the people in those states would be....

Don't let that stop them. They don't care anyway, amirite?
 
2012-11-11 08:45:21 PM  

FormlessOne: Did anyone cover the fact that it's a collection of disgruntled morons, and not the state governments themselves, signing these petitions, and that these petitions are utterly pointless except as a possible way for media outlets to feed on the last crumbs at the "Obama kicked Romney's ass" table?

Yes? Ah, well, then. Keep at it.


Examiner.com is not really a media outlet. It's more a place you can have a blog, if you like to pretend that you're a real reporter.
 
2012-11-11 08:48:17 PM  

HST's Dead Carcass: It should also be noted: Everyone signing this is committing treason against The United States Of America. Enjoy your prison time, secessionists.


"Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying War against them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. No Person shall be convicted of Treason unless on the Testimony of two Witnesses to the same overt Act, or on Confession in open Court."
 
2012-11-11 08:48:36 PM  

HST's Dead Carcass: It should also be noted: Everyone signing this is committing treason against The United States Of America. Enjoy your prison time, secessionists.


What if you don't live in Louisiana, Mississippi, Arizona, or Texas but just want the moronic bigots gone? Is "for the lulz" a valid defense?
 
2012-11-11 08:51:51 PM  
Funny thing is, if the conservatives had won and were gloating all over the place, nobody would much care because they'd already be known for being boorish and low-class; what's another week?
 
2012-11-11 08:52:11 PM  

abb3w: PreMortem: So its up to the Executive branch to grant secession now?
News to me.

Yeah. The most the President can do is recommend the necessary constitutional Amendment to congress... but, that recommendation is indeed within his power.

If they agree to a short period (say, 12 years) for people who do/don't want to leave the US to sort themselves out across the new borders, to assume a per-capita share of the US national debt (in exchange for a per-capita share of the Social Security Trust), leaving the Mississippi river open to trade, I think the departure of the South could be peacefully negotiated.

Taking em back? More expensive.


They would also have to pay for all the federal government property within their borders.
 
2012-11-11 08:52:14 PM  

HST's Dead Carcass: Once they all leave, they'll have to pick a new name, Th USA is taken.


That part's EASY.

The Confederate States of America. You know they'll do it.
 
2012-11-11 08:56:00 PM  

DemonEater: HST's Dead Carcass: Once they all leave, they'll have to pick a new name, Th USA is taken.

That part's EASY.

The Confederate States of America. You know they'll do it.


Anecdotally, most creative people tend to have Liberal views so its your suggestion or:

The United Christian States of America
 
2012-11-11 08:58:02 PM  
Sure thing. you can seceded.

One thing though. Since you aren't a part of the US anymore, We're not letting you use united states currency anymore.

Since you are also a threat to the union, we are going to put trade sanctions on you.

We'll also be taking back all of our military hardware.

Oh, and forget about using our airspace or sea lanes.

The electrical grid is also going to be severed, and you will need a passport to enter the USA.

Enjoy your 3rd world hell hole.
 
2012-11-11 08:58:29 PM  
Arent all 15 of these states taking in more that they give back?
 
2012-11-11 08:58:53 PM  
Let Texas go. I give it 2 years and they are a third-world country. They would have to implement an income tax, something they do not have now and the reason so many people move there. Also, if I could find the article, some economist predicted that more than half of the major corporations based in TX, like American Airlines, would move the corp HQ out of Texas in the aftermath of succession.

Besides, if they leave, the chance of a GOP president in the next 40year is all but gone. I say let them go.
 
2012-11-11 09:03:03 PM  

nmemkha: *Shug* Maybe its grand experiment know as the United States is over. I feel bad for many of the red flyover states: they got nothing.

[sandiegofreepress.org image 425x419]

/In a Absolutely GOP World


That map should be altered. Jesusland just got a lot smaller, given the results of the last election...
 
2012-11-11 09:09:30 PM  
When your side loses an election, you should always consider secession. That is exactly what happened prior to the Civil War. It made no more sense then and it makes no sense now.

Maybe the test to qualify a person to vote should be based on mental maturity and not physical age.
 
2012-11-11 09:09:31 PM  

DemonEater: HST's Dead Carcass: Once they all leave, they'll have to pick a new name, Th USA is taken.

That part's EASY.

The Confederate States of America. You know they'll do it.


The sad thing? They have sort of forgotten why we went from the Articles of Confederation to our republic. This sad lot is angry still because we didn't let them try and fail to make a go of it. Then again with Mexico and Britain slavering for expansion of their own territories, they might be more like the Canuckistanis by now...
 
2012-11-11 09:10:08 PM  

nmemkha: DemonEater: HST's Dead Carcass: Once they all leave, they'll have to pick a new name, Th USA is taken.

That part's EASY.

The Confederate States of America. You know they'll do it.

Anecdotally, most creative people tend to have Liberal views so its your suggestion or:

The United Christian States of America


I thought they were just going to name it "Bain Capital Holdings"
 
2012-11-11 09:15:24 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: Gyrfalcon:

However, anyone wanting to force the issue should recall what happened in Los Angeles during the riots, when the Marines were deployed to keep order. They kept order, all right; and when some fool decided the Marines would never fire on US citizens and decided to crash a roadblock, they shot him dead.

National Guardsman, actually.


I live here. It was the Marines.
 
2012-11-11 09:24:03 PM  

Forbidden Doughnut: nmemkha: *Shug* Maybe its grand experiment know as the United States is over. I feel bad for many of the red flyover states: they got nothing.

[sandiegofreepress.org image 425x419]

/In a Absolutely GOP World

That map should be altered. Jesusland just got a lot smaller, given the results of the last election...


Yes it. I suspect if will get even smaller if shiat ever gets real. Some people may be bigoted tools, but not all are complete idiots.
 
2012-11-11 09:26:25 PM  

fluffy2097: nmemkha: DemonEater: HST's Dead Carcass: Once they all leave, they'll have to pick a new name, Th USA is taken.

That part's EASY.

The Confederate States of America. You know they'll do it.

Anecdotally, most creative people tend to have Liberal views so its your suggestion or:

The United Christian States of America

I thought they were just going to name it "Bain Capital Holdings"


maybe they should call it "We didn't learn the first two times"
 
2012-11-11 09:40:06 PM  

chuckufarlie: maybe they should call it "We didn't learn the first two times"


That would require a level of self awareness they clearly do not have.

"We're gonna do it right this time land" might work. Republicans will assume it means they'll make a better America without the rest of the country, Everyone else will realize they've taken it in the ass all the previous times they've tried.
 
2012-11-11 09:43:17 PM  

PiperArrow: The US continues to suffer economic difficulties stemming from the federal government's neglect to reform domestic and foreign spending. The citizens of the US suffer from blatant abuses of their rights such as the NDAA, the TSA, etc. Given that the state of Texas maintains a balanced budget and is the 15th largest economy in the world, it is practically feasible for Texas to withdraw from the union, and to do so would protect it's citizens' standard of living and re-secure their rights and liberties in accordance with the original ideas and beliefs of our founding fathers which are no longer being reflected by the federal government.

A product of the Texas educational system, no doubt.


Hey I make that mistake every once in a while.

But wait, I was educated in Texas, hmm...
 
2012-11-11 09:55:04 PM  
Its still boring.

A petition to clone Sherman and whip the south into shape? That's exciting.
 
2012-11-11 10:03:29 PM  

sprag: A petition to clone Sherman and whip the south into shape? That's exciting.


Sherman Hemsley?
 
2012-11-11 10:05:49 PM  
We barely get the internees in Arkansas. Hence we aren't on the list.
/
 
2012-11-11 10:14:09 PM  

Harry_Seldon: sprag: A petition to clone Sherman and whip the south into shape? That's exciting.

Sherman Hemsley?


www.eurthisnthat.com
 
2012-11-11 10:14:35 PM  
And they say Dems were butthurt in 2000. It's nearly been a week and GOPers are still pissing themselves.
 
2012-11-11 10:25:00 PM  

Smackledorfer: You get nothing that could be classified as upriver either, because we know how you farkers are going to pollute the shiat out ofinto it immediately.


FTFY
 
2012-11-11 10:32:31 PM  

Evil High Priest: BlippityBleep: oh gawd let oregon go. pleasepleasepleaseplease!

FREEMYPEOPLE! FREEMYPEOPLE!


haha you misunderstand me. i spent 5 years in that shiathole and the dunning-kruger effect is working overtime in that mess. i'd love to see what would happen to them.
 
2012-11-11 10:32:40 PM  
Every time I hear these whiny dumbfarks scream succession, I keep on hoping the President would let them all migrate to one state, get everyone who doesn't want to secede out of said, state, then lock off its borders and declare it a separate country.

They'd never stop screaming for help once the US government stopped giving them money to live long enough to write up their own constitution and set up their own government.
 
2012-11-11 10:55:13 PM  
If they want to go, here's what I propose:

a) All US possessions to be returned to the US government (government buildings are to be converted, if necessary, to consulates--assuming, of course, the US doesn't consider the Neo-Confederacy to be an innately hostile power and have Switzerland as its representing power...and knowing some of the whargarbl that neo-Confederate secessionists DO spout, I do think the relationship would end that way). Yes, this includes whatever gold/silver/alien artifacts may be stored at Fort Knox's vaults; no, you cannot has, not yours.

b) The US government will grant refugee status and ultimate citizenship to anyone wishing to leave the Neo-Confederacy due to a legitimate concern of persecution due to racial, religious, sexual orientation or gender identification, or political status. (Pretty much neo-Confederates have all but stated that they intend to explicitly disenfranchise non-dominionists, and more than a few have even called for explicit progroms and mass killings of LGBT people, neopagans and members of non-Abrahamic faiths, and "liberals".)

c) Assuming they decide to apply at all for UN membership (not a given, because most of those neo-Confederates are also FIERCELY anti-UN) the US reminds them that it has a permanent seat on the UN Security Council and will have a strong say over ultimate recognition.

d) The US reserves the right to militarily invade in such cases where the national security of the United States or its possessions are threatened by the neo-Confederacy, up to and including targeted attacks against US nationals or Neo-CSA persons seeking to immigrate to the United States.

e) Upon such time that the secessionist states come crawling back on their hands and knees begging forgiveness, they will NOT be reincorporated as states but as unincorporated, unorganised territories of the United States in a similar status to Guam assuming no hostilities have been launched against the US. At this point they will NOT be full US citizens (only US nationals, just as in the case of Guam) and primary developmental efforts will concentrate on the reintroduction to plural-party democracy and development of industry (because it's probably going to be just as shiatty as Guam's at this point, if not Zimbabwe-esque levels of "Farked Economy").

After an acceptable period of management as an unincorporated, unorganised possession (with an appropriate governor of affairs reporting to the Office of Insular Affairs, Department of the Interior) they may petition for commonwealth status; after an acceptable period of time as commonwealths and showing loyalty to the US (and affording time to allow the Neo-Confederacy territory to be brought up to standards of a developed nation--many of the individual states, including Louisiana and Mississippi, have development levels as is only to the point of less developed nations) they may petition for statehood.

If they are very very good and very very lucky they may even get statehood as quickly as Puerto Rico has. :D (Frankly, the biggest goddamn mistake this country ever did was letting Reconstruction end too soon. We spent longer in Germany and Japan after World War II and they still have issues with their local Nazi-resurrectionist and "Emperor First" political movements, and suffice it to say that the infected wound that welled up in the Civil War has festered a LOT longer.)

f) In the case where a state of the Neo-Confederacy (or the Neo-Confederacy itself) has engaged in hostile acts against the United States, United States persons (including nationals) or persons seeking nationality and/or asylum in the US or in such a case where active human rights violations have occurred (including disenfranchisement of populations, genocide, ethnocide and "ethnic cleansing", and so on) they will NOT start as an unincorporated, unorganised territory but will in fact be organised as frank military districts (in the same model as both the original concept of Reconstruction and--more apt to today--the military district set up in Japan from 1945 until restoration of home rule in 1951). Suffice it to say that all management will be conducted by specific appointed governors, there will be a longterm and extensive program of "De-Dixification" (yes, in the general model of De-Nazification programs), unorganised and unincorporated territory status will NOT be given until such time as it is adjudged that "De-Dixification" of such districts is successful, and until this is done these areas will be considered to be under martial law.

If the Neo-Confederacy is ESPECIALLY naughty--re-establishment of "Biblical Slavery", genocide, that sort of thing--the US also reserves the right to call in full NATO and/or United Nations support towards a final pacification and "De-Dixification" of the Neo-Confederacy. In short: You will wish the President and the General of the Army at that period was William Tecumseh Sherman, because the March to the Sea may well end up looking gentle in comparison. (And yes, let's just say that the US and our partner nations in NATO HAVE gotten some very nice training in urban warfare in the US. Ironically, one of the bigger facilities for this training is in fact in Kentucky.)
 
2012-11-11 10:56:39 PM  
President Obama must act without hesitation and reinforce Fort Sumter immediately.
 
2012-11-11 11:06:34 PM  
Not to point out anything rational, but every national company would leave these states. Wal-Mart would leave - let Texas negotiate its own trade agreements with China. Dell would leave - US companies would not retain a foreign-owned service company. NASA would leave. Oil from Texas-based companies would be heavily tarriffed on import into the United States - let's tax them 50%! Why not?

These morons had a chance to change the course of history - it's called 'voting'. I wonder how many people signing these petitions didn't actually vote.
 
2012-11-11 11:14:18 PM  
Oooh, several hundreds of people in some cases. Scary.
 
2012-11-11 11:16:14 PM  

runwiz: President Obama must act without hesitation and reinforce Fort Sumter immediately.


That should end on a high note.
 
2012-11-11 11:17:15 PM  
How could secession work for these states financially? Some of them, for example Mississippi, take in almost 2 dollars for every dollar in Federal taxes. Some, like Texas, are about even. So, would a state like Texas institute an income tax equal to the old Federal tax to replace that money? Or would they just cut all social programs and defense spending to zero for some real savings? Even if they are hoping that all those "freeloaders" on welfare or unemployment leave, that is only 11% of the total federal budget, there isn't that much savings there. Maybe they could force other "undesirables" such as those retired on social security or those needing medical care to leave or die as well, and have some savings that way, but how much could it be? They would have to ditch or kill half of their population, all retired people and have no defense budget or medical care to reduce the tax to zero. They would be faced with raising state taxes to replace at least a bare minimum of the old Federal services. Not to mention that they are going to have one severe brain drain or professionals that don't want to live in a third world country any more.
 
2012-11-11 11:26:29 PM  
And.... Now Facebook is flooded with "15 STATES WANT TO SECEDE!!!" idiocy.

This is why we can't have nice things.
 
2012-11-11 11:32:53 PM  

deeyablo: I love my state (Texas), and I think Houston is incredibly underrated. Massive amount of cultural diversity, learning, arts, good people, great food.

The direction my state has been going, I am not against moving. I have lived here my entire life, and consider myself Texan, through and through. That said, I think I need to be in a state that wants to go in a direction I believe in, where education is not politicized, where the working poor are not marginalized, where people care about the glory of their natural world, and want to preserve it.

I wish for better for my state. It causes me anguish.


I love Texas too. The derp is heavy, wade through it. Our US of A needs our brass balls. Stay the course.
 
2012-11-11 11:43:14 PM  

acanuck: wow - all 328 Republicans in Oregon signed the petition.

The butt...it hurts


Now we know how Gary is passing the time.
 
2012-11-11 11:59:22 PM  

propasaurus: acanuck: wow - all 328 Republicans in Oregon signed the petition.

The butt...it hurts

Now we know how Gary is passing the time.


You're assuming he's still alive and not dead of some self-inflicted gunshot wound in the bottom of his silo.

I heard some cartridge casings hitting the floor.
 
2012-11-12 12:14:06 AM  

acanuck: wow - all 328 Republicans in Oregon signed the petition.

The butt...it hurts


Outside of Portland or college towns = Idaho, West. I live in the red part of Oregon, and I'm less than an hour out of PDX.

There are plenty of dirt-farmin' rednecks in these here parts, right down to confederate flags and wife-beaters.
 
2012-11-12 12:19:04 AM  

Lenny_da_Hog: acanuck: wow - all 328 Republicans in Oregon signed the petition.

The butt...it hurts

Outside of Portland or college towns = Idaho, West. I live in the red part of Oregon, and I'm less than an hour out of PDX.

There are plenty of dirt-farmin' rednecks in these here parts, right down to confederate flags and wife-beaters.


Just go a little south of Eugene. Redneck meth-head heaven...
 
2012-11-12 12:25:10 AM  

mediablitz: Lenny_da_Hog: acanuck: wow - all 328 Republicans in Oregon signed the petition.

The butt...it hurts

Outside of Portland or college towns = Idaho, West. I live in the red part of Oregon, and I'm less than an hour out of PDX.

There are plenty of dirt-farmin' rednecks in these here parts, right down to confederate flags and wife-beaters.

Just go a little south of Eugene. Redneck meth-head heaven...


You people aren't kidding. I live in PDX and I talk with seemingly absolutely reasonable people, and for some reason I start talking politics with them, and I immediately think, "Whut, where did that come from?"

I had one woman I know compare Obama to Hitler because she considers them both charismatic.
 
2012-11-12 12:33:58 AM  
they don't realize how racist and butthurt, childish and stupid this looks, do they

/damn you texas grow the f*ck up
 
2012-11-12 12:40:37 AM  

js34603: Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.


The "movement" in this story is just a few disgruntled crazies angry that a America, to quote a GOP bumper sticker, Re-Nigged in 2012. But what if this were a serious, credible movement to secede? I wouldn't cheer for states to leave the country, but if the citizens of said state(s) decide they no longer want to be part of the UNITED States of America, that's their choice and I'm not going to waste my time begging them to stay. Our nation would be better off with fewer states who want to move forward and improve our lives rather than focusing on getting the black guy out of the White House. That's not to say we'll always agree - we won't. But disagreeing with someone who has America's best interest at heart is light years away from disagreeing with today's GOP that simply wants to stick it to Obama and the Libs.

So to recap: cheering? No. But if you want to leave, the door is right there. And if that makes me look "just as bad" in your eyes, I can live with that very easily.
 
2012-11-12 12:49:09 AM  

The Why Not Guy: js34603: Stop cheering for states to leave the country, it makes you look just as bad as them.

The "movement" in this story is just a few disgruntled crazies angry that a America, to quote a GOP bumper sticker, Re-Nigged in 2012. But what if this were a serious, credible movement to secede? I wouldn't cheer for states to leave the country, but if the citizens of said state(s) decide they no longer want to be part of the UNITED States of America, that's their choice and I'm not going to waste my time begging them to stay. Our nation would be better off with fewer states who want to move forward and improve our lives rather than focusing on getting the black guy out of the White House. That's not to say we'll always agree - we won't. But disagreeing with someone who has America's best interest at heart is light years away from disagreeing with today's GOP that simply wants to stick it to Obama and the Libs.

So to recap: cheering? No. But if you want to leave, the door is right there. And if that makes me look "just as bad" in your eyes, I can live with that very easily.


As an Australian, I'm not at all invested in this but it would seem that the Fed would do well to appoint a really lousy attorney to oppose the cases of states who draw a hell of a lot more in funding than they contribute. So appoint someone very sensible in the case of NY, NJ, Texas etc, and a drunkard in the cases involving some of the others. Literally hundreds of millions of Americans would benefit.
 
2012-11-12 01:04:51 AM  
More like a couple hundred angry, misinformed people from 15 states. Good riddance.
 
2012-11-12 01:07:14 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: All those troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home.


Wait, really? My cousin just got shipped there.
 
2012-11-12 01:09:39 AM  
The secession of the first dozen would not only increase the economic well being of the US, but would increase the average IQ by 20 points at least, which would require those test to be recalibrated. That would be a good thing. Getting 200 signatures on a petition in New York would be possible regardless of the question, so their count has no meaning.

The main problem with all those states seceding is that it would create a whole bunch of third world countries who would probably even be greater leaches on the US then they are now.
 
2012-11-12 01:13:16 AM  
img389.imageshack.us

/shocked this hasn't been posted
 
2012-11-12 01:13:18 AM  
i42.photobucket.com
 
NFA
2012-11-12 01:17:53 AM  
"Fifteen states file petitions to secede? Now we're talking "


firstfriday.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-11-12 01:17:54 AM  
Will they begin by canceling the Pledge of Allegence?
. . ... , I N D I V I S I B L E, with Liberty and Justice for all (1).

(1) all does not include gays, atheists, arabs, muslums, and worst of all, liberals.
 
2012-11-12 01:26:08 AM  

Mugato: machodonkeywrestler: I'd like to point out that Obama got 46% of the popular vote from GA.

That's what sucks about the electoral college. Not every part of Georgia are shiat kicking hicks and Florida for example is like three different countries.


I have the misfortune of living in a place sometimes referred to as "Bonus Georgia". Jacksonville, Florida. Where no matter how dumb someone is on the internet, they're still smarter than the drivers around me.
 
2012-11-12 01:30:07 AM  

NFA: nonsense


I love how you read a story about people in fifteen states filing nonsense petitions to secede because Barack Obama won the election and think "wow, Democrats sure are whiny"
 
2012-11-12 01:51:19 AM  
Louisiana
2012 Presidential Election

As of Saturday November 10, 2012, 15 States backwards, hickish, tea-party morons from 15 states have petitioned the Obama Administration for withdrawal from the United States of America in order to create its own government.


Fixed that for accuracy...

How about we all just pitch in and buy them all an inflatable pool island from wally world and set them adrift in their new libertarian paradise?
 
NFA
2012-11-12 01:54:47 AM  

The Why Not Guy: NFA: nonsense

I love how you read a story about people in fifteen states filing nonsense petitions to secede because Barack Obama won the election and think "wow, Democrats sure are whiny"


Nah, just a mistake. I attempted to post one like below but it didn't work, so I selected another not realizing it said Democratic party.

t2.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-12 02:09:18 AM  
More secession talk after 150 years. And for basically the same reasons, too.
 
2012-11-12 05:36:28 AM  
This would never happen. The BCS would never allow it.
 
2012-11-12 06:27:13 AM  
Let 'em go.
 
2012-11-12 06:28:04 AM  

NFA:

Nah, just a mistake. I attempted to post one like below but it didn't work, so I selected another not realizing it said Democratic party.

[t2.gstatic.com image 222x227]


I was going to say. That first image didn't make sense, even for a republitard.
 
2012-11-12 08:08:03 AM  
Oh how cute. The states that receive THE MOST in handouts from the federal government think they can do better on their own.

/Morans
//Go for it, I dare ya.
 
2012-11-12 08:12:21 AM  
CPennypacker:

www.strongtowns.org



DO IT WE COULD USE THE MONEY YOU farkING FREELOADERS


i73.photobucket.com

 
2012-11-12 09:04:36 AM  

syrynxx: Not to point out anything rational, but every national company would leave these states. Wal-Mart would leave - let Texas negotiate its own trade agreements with China. Dell would leave - US companies would not retain a foreign-owned service company. NASA would leave. Oil from Texas-based companies would be heavily tarriffed on import into the United States - let's tax them 50%! Why not?

These morons had a chance to change the course of history - it's called 'voting'. I wonder how many people signing these petitions didn't actually vote.


You saying voting is the answer.

Just a small history lesson: No state that was a Confederate State voted for Lincoln, yet he won the Presidency winning 60% of the electoral vote but only 40% of the popular vote, which was the final straw, igniting the secession which began 1 month before his inauguration.

Here in 2012, similar situation, with the exception of Florida, and the fact that there were only 2 real candidates and Obama won around 51% of the Popular vote. People voted. People Got butthurt because they feel under represented, or they are just racist morons, whatever it may be. Now they want to secede.

Then again the same thing happened after Bush won reelection. Within days there was ridiculous talk comin from the left about secession. I doubt thy were anymore serious than the attempts now, possibly less serious, but the talk was still there.

But my main point, voting. People seem to be okay with sticking out 4-8 years under a President and Comgress they don't agree with. But at some point, they get upset and realize that they're vote doesn't really make a bit of difference. Maybe if they get together with enough like minded people and scream loud enough someone will pay them some attention. And when that doesn't work they grab weapons and start slinging them every where. Doesn't matter who they are. White, black, man, woman, republican, democrat, genius, moron; it's like asking why, in the year 2012 is there still war. Because people don't agree. We want what we want when we want it and we will only wait for so long before we get up and start slinging poop at each other.

Do I think these attempts are serious? Nope. Evening Louisiana gets to 25,000 signatures that still only .5% of the states population. Come back to me when they get to a solid 5% and we'll talk. You see how this works? Not enough people have banded together and started throwing crap at me, so it's of no real concern.
 
2012-11-12 09:10:41 AM  
Damn you autocorrect. You make my thought out comment look like an idiot wrote it.
 
2012-11-12 11:55:48 AM  
homelessdude: FWIW...........

Not that any of these wing-nut glue sniffers every bothered to check, but secession is a lot more complicated than putting up a few EZ-Pass booths at the state line. This particular article was probably written in response to the Bush election fiasco, but just switch the colors and the state names. The rest is academic.

Does the Constitution Permit the Blue States to Secede?
With Permission, Perhaps; Unilaterally, No (findlaw.com)
By Michael C. Dorf
FindLaw
November 24, 2004


None of these ever address the fact, though, that if - for instance - New York and all New England just stopped recognizing the federal government and decided to reincorporate as their own nation (which, if any region of the country could, it's them) what is the federal government's play? Is a president going to send in the military and start firing on people? Is he going to nuke Rhode Island? What's the play?

Insurrections and rebellions were easier for a president to put down before television.
 
2012-11-12 02:38:25 PM  

NFA: The Why Not Guy: NFA: nonsense

I love how you read a story about people in fifteen states filing nonsense petitions to secede because Barack Obama won the election and think "wow, Democrats sure are whiny"

Nah, just a mistake. I attempted to post one like below but it didn't work, so I selected another not realizing it said Democratic party.

[t2.gstatic.com image 222x227]


Well, the last one would have applied after Gore/Lieberman lost back in 2000...

/ remembers the (somewhat justified ) butthurt back then...
// I suspect Gore wouldn't be any better than Bush as President...
/// esp. with Lieberman as VP (*shudder*)
 
2012-11-13 12:42:53 AM  
How many of the signatures so far are Weedlord Bonerhitler?
 
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