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(Fark)   Obscure family member today: "I voted for the guy who isn't wrecking the country by forcing us all to be Muslims." Share your derp experiences from either side of the aisle from election day here   (fark.com) divider line 378
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7639 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Nov 2012 at 6:57 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-06 08:35:01 PM

Silly Jesus: 1. Woman on phone at the grocery store. - "Christ is still the King and he has a plan for us. He will cast his vote."
2. Woman behind me in line to vote. - "Votin' is important. I gots to keep my check a comin'."

Guess who each voted for?

I still can't believe that we still allow ignorant / low information / outright retarded people to vote. Hell, a first grade math test would have likely thrown these two wastes of air out of the process.


Good for you for knowing you're better than other people. We're all thankful you walk among us.

scarmig: I can't participate. I am the guy my family would be posting about.


/conscientious abstainer. I won't have the blood they spill on my hands. Not in the War on Terror, the War on Drugs, the War on Privacy, the War on Obesity, the War on Education, etc, etc, ad nauseum


As long as you're paying taxes to help fund the War On Killing Foreign Brown People you're alright with me mate.

queezyweezel: From my friends:
*all cars are being made in mexico and china since Obama took office
* how can you care about issues like gay marriage and equal rights when so many people are unemployed?
*Obama is so weak that the international community laughs at us. I'm voting Romney because we're not pussies
*If he lied about Benghazi, what else is he lying about? I can't trust him, so I'm voting Romeny.

/facepalm


Stop facepalming, start making friends that aren't mentally disabled.

sgt cyanide: oh for farks sake. letting the liters in is like letting these 'obscure family member[s]' vote

do what i do with my closet republican dad- try to keep them busy until the polls close. mymymy dad the office is busssssssy to-day!


You too can be an elitist troll ass for only $5.00 a month! Hey Kids! Be the first on your block!

themeaningoflifeisnot: My father is a staunch conservative. I'm as liberal as can be. We lead a happy existence together because he hates talking politics. More important to him to talk about good books, good restaurants, his grandchildren, etc. I am so grateful for that when I read threads like this.


Bless your heart. My dad is long gone and i miss him terribly.
 
2012-11-06 08:35:52 PM
I spoke with my mother on the phone this weekend and she mentioned that she knew several people who were going to write in Rick Santorum. Why yes, they were crazy church folk, why do you ask?
 
2012-11-06 08:36:07 PM
I heard somebody tell the "don't re-nig" joke today. Get it? Yeah, me too. Our species still mostly sucks.
 
2012-11-06 08:36:08 PM
so.. my husband's family is from the south. the your brother is your uncle kind of south. i was told today, "Are you kidding? I'd rather vote for a n***** than a mormon!".
f.m.l.
 
2012-11-06 08:36:27 PM

Gough: My obscure family members haven't spoken or emailed me since before the 2008 election. They we're emailing me on a regular basis with all sorts of derp. When I finally had had enough, I made a contribution to Al Franken in their names (they live in MN, I don't). I told them what I had done, and promised to make additional contribution for every political email that they sent me. The problem seems to have been solved.


I'm Mudgen, and I approve of this post.
 
2012-11-06 08:37:17 PM

skinink: Sign some former used car lot owner north of Boston posted about his failed business. I think his business failed because he wasted his money making stupid signs like this.
[img10.imageshack.us image 800x600]


There's no way money was spent on that sign!
 
2012-11-06 08:38:05 PM

reklamfox: Posted in another thread, but sharing here as well

[i47.tinypic.com image 426x639] 

/A friend came home to his apt in NY City a few weeks ago to find this derp taped to his door


At least Barack emails me.
 
2012-11-06 08:38:38 PM
From my FB: The result of the election will really test the theory, 'once you go black you never go back.'
 
2012-11-06 08:39:02 PM

bratling: so.. my husband's family is from the south. the your brother is your uncle kind of south. i was told today, "Are you kidding? I'd rather vote for a n***** than a mormon!".
f.m.l.


I almost want to see that on a T-shirt. Almost.
 
2012-11-06 08:39:56 PM

bratling: so.. my husband's family is from the south. the your brother is your uncle kind of south. i was told today, "Are you kidding? I'd rather vote for a n***** than a mormon!".


Technically, that's progress, right?
 
2012-11-06 08:40:45 PM

spidermilk: "Obama and his wife are pieces of shiat" and to support this statement she added "the main reason he's in office is bc of his color."

Yep that makes sense because there are so many African Americans in the US. This is coming from a girl who is Mexican. Of course, she also works in a hospital and will not get a flu shot because she FIRMLY believes they give you the flu.

I am so glad today is over because I am a young female engineering working in an office with a bunch of older, white, male engineers. They are all huge Romney supporters and they constantly group up and talk about it. The owner of our company showed me the most hilarious joke which was this:
[3.bp.blogspot.com image 333x400] but with text saying "Democratic National Convention" added.

/hilarious. if you're 75 and unable to use a computer.


Oh wow I'm an engineer too. There are plenty of conservative white guys in my office. Fortunately there is one very intelligent and charismatic black guy who is an obvious Obama supporter so they all kind of keep their derp to themselves.
 
2012-11-06 08:41:05 PM
"I tell you, if we get another four years of Obama, the democrats will run an illegal alien in 2016. And the first thing he's gonna do is erase the US-Mexican border."

Another hit from Uncle Wingnut.
 
2012-11-06 08:41:20 PM

KrispyKritter: You too can be an elitist troll ass for only $5.00 a month! Hey Kids! Be the first on your block!


lulz. me? its the first thing people say to describe me. 'sarge? i dunno- probabsably ballin trollin so hard in some thread'
 
2012-11-06 08:43:17 PM

Smirky the Wonder Chimp: "I tell you, if we get another four years of Obama, the democrats will run an illegal alien in 2016. And the first thing he's gonna do is erase the US-Mexican border."

Another hit from Uncle Wingnut.


Well, if that happened then I guess corporations "shipping our jobs off to Mexico" wouldn't be a problem anymore, right? Bring it on.
 
2012-11-06 08:47:30 PM
Subby, nothing is obscure on Fark.
 
2012-11-06 08:52:07 PM

WhippingBoy: Are you starting to understand?

DEMOCRACY DOES NOT WORK!!!


No, your whole electoral system is the part that doesn't work. Don't blame the concept for being broken when the unnecessarily complex system you designed to try and implement it breaks down.

Frankly, any system where someone can win the popular vote but still lose the election is badly designed.
 
2012-11-06 08:53:25 PM

Silly Jesus: 1. Woman on phone at the grocery store. - "Christ is still the King and he has a plan for us. He will cast his vote."
2. Woman behind me in line to vote. - "Votin' is important. I gots to keep my check a comin'."

Guess who each voted for?

I still can't believe that we still allow ignorant / low information / outright retarded people to vote. Hell, a first grade math test would have likely thrown these two wastes of air out of the process.


What is ignorant or retarded about that? They are voting in their own best interests, however much you might disagree. Seems rather informed to me. I don't agree with it myself, but you did not give a very good example of ignorant or retarded.
 
2012-11-06 08:53:44 PM

freewill: ...
It was only then that I realized that, in theory, my SSID could be as obscene as I wanted it to be, and nobody would really be able to do anything about it.

/ Would they?

 

Good question, I'll be sure to use this as a topic for my online classes. Cyber Security is my major, logging into unsecured access points and changing the SSID is one of my hobbies. It's a good time.
 
2012-11-06 08:54:37 PM
gop'er. "If Obama gets elected, we will go from having the best healthcare system in the world to having the absolute worst."

me: "who will have a better system?"

gop'er: "................ what do you mean?"

me: "if we have the worst, that means others are better, who will they be?"

gop'er: "nobody, Im just saying."
 
2012-11-06 08:55:34 PM

Xanlexian: Whoever wins, we lose.


FOUR MOR YEARS!*

of bullshiat from one party or the other
 
2012-11-06 08:56:43 PM
Not political, but relevant derp:

Just went to help grandma and my aunt move in to a 50+ retirement community, get the cable working, change light bulbs, fix broken things, do handyman stuff like that. My Other Aunt came up as well to do curtains and other esthetic items.

Just before we all went our separate ways we all went to lunch at a local restaurant. Other Aunt started telling us how she had been talking to all the neighbors, and how they were all glad that they had moved in and wished them well, and how they were glad they weren't... You know...

Grandma didn't know. Grandma is 90+ years old and almost deaf even when she bothers to put her hearing aids in.

I leaned over... "YOU KNOW... YOU'RE NOT BLACK LIKE THE LAST TENANTS!"

Grandma got it.... But you never saw such frantic shooshing and wild handwaving from a self-proclaimed liberal as my Other Aunt acted out at that moment.

It was a long trip back, since OA was providing my ride home. Halfway through the three-hour drive:

OA: "I didn't mean it was because they were black! It's just that they had 18 grandchildren and the neighbors all said they didn't have anything to do when they visited!"

me: mmm. You know, there are white people with lots of grandchildren who can't find entertainment in a retirement community...

OA: "Well, they were all asking what shape the place was in after they left."

me: "Looked pretty good to me. I had to replace 2 light bulbs, and one of the wheels on the sliding shower door track was loose."

OA: (long quiet ride)

OA one hour later: "It's not because they were black!" 

/ I do love my aunt.
 
2012-11-06 08:56:50 PM

megalynn44: I just don't get where that comes from. What instance of reality can they point to to support this assertion?


Pretty sure you just answered your own question.
 
2012-11-06 08:57:30 PM

poe_zlaw: gop'er. "If Obama gets elected, we will go from having the best healthcare system in the world to having the absolute worst."

me: "who will have a better system?"

gop'er: "................ what do you mean?"

me: "if we have the worst, that means others are better, who will they be?"

gop'er: "nobody, Im just saying."


That logic is surprisingly sound if start with one assumption: there are no countries besides America.
 
2012-11-06 08:57:33 PM
My girlfriend's sister is deathly afraid that there will be riots in the streets if Obama loses, and that if that happens he won't relinquish the presidency.

Reminded me of the derp on the left after Bush's 2nd term was set to expire. I told her that and she was all like, "That doesn't make any sense, Bush respected the constitution."

Fun night. I had wine!
 
2012-11-06 08:59:48 PM
Umm, subby, I'm calling bullshiat on your headline.

/apologies if im late to the party here or you've already copped to the troll
 
2012-11-06 09:00:29 PM

ProfessorOhki: poe_zlaw: gop'er. "If Obama gets elected, we will go from having the best healthcare system in the world to having the absolute worst."

me: "who will have a better system?"

gop'er: "................ what do you mean?"

me: "if we have the worst, that means others are better, who will they be?"

gop'er: "nobody, Im just saying."

That logic is surprisingly sound if start with one assumption: there are no countries besides America.


but then we would still have the best
 
2012-11-06 09:02:08 PM

poe_zlaw: ProfessorOhki: poe_zlaw: gop'er. "If Obama gets elected, we will go from having the best healthcare system in the world to having the absolute worst."

me: "who will have a better system?"

gop'er: "................ what do you mean?"

me: "if we have the worst, that means others are better, who will they be?"

gop'er: "nobody, Im just saying."

That logic is surprisingly sound if start with one assumption: there are no countries besides America.

but then we would still have the best


...but it would be the worst.
 
2012-11-06 09:02:25 PM

roadkillontheweb: The place I work at is also a polling place. It was very busy all day but one comment that was made stood out. The voter stated that they heard on the radio if you vote a straight Democratic ticket it does not count the vote for Obama. When asked if it changed the vote to Romney she said no it just didn't register a vote for anyone in the presidential race.


Are you in NC by any chance? That happens to be true in NC -- a straight ticket vote doesn't cover the president. You have to mark your ballot separately for president.
 
2012-11-06 09:03:37 PM

ilikeracecars: I didn't vote today because....


I'm a Canadian, and don't live in the states, but thanks for inviting me to this thread! Really nice Derp you've got here.
 
2012-11-06 09:05:46 PM
My grandmother: If you vote for Obama, you're disinherited.
 
2012-11-06 09:06:20 PM

megalynn44: I just don't get where that comes from. What instance of reality can they point to to support this assertion?


Already mentioned in another thread, but my two stories:

1) Woman at my mother's church told her, "I have having to choose between a Mormon and a Muslim for president"

2) Speaker at a charity dinner I attended a few days ago, "Please go out and vote so we can give America back to Jesus."

Different kinds of derp, I daresay.
 
2012-11-06 09:07:20 PM

Jackpot777: [i.imgur.com image 580x801] 

I don't know which is funniest. The addition of taxes to pay for sex-change ops (pro-tip: laws are written by the Congress. The House has a Republican majority)? The lie about the power of God being in the Constitution ("no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States." - Article VI of that Constitution)? Or the idea that God wants America to do well, but only if enough people bow down and change his mind? Tolerance is a bad thing for the religious?

I'm going with font mania! Bold! Italic! Change CASE! Change the size!

It comes from a number that, when Googled, is from a known telemarketer. Way to guarantee you piss people off, Bible Bashers!


That looks like the waiver the kids had to sign in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.
 
2012-11-06 09:08:16 PM

skinink: Sign some former used car lot owner north of Boston posted about his failed business. I think his business failed because he wasted his money making stupid signs like this.


In the for what it's worth department, I know a podiatrist who swears he had to fire all of his staff and retire because the medicare restructuring with Obama care decreased payments to podiatrists to the point he was losing money to keep operating.
 
2012-11-06 09:08:50 PM

reklamfox: Posted in another thread, but sharing here as well

[i47.tinypic.com image 426x639] 

/A friend came home to his apt in NY City a few weeks ago to find this derp taped to his door


The derp is strong with this one.
 
2012-11-06 09:14:48 PM
theintelhub.com

"I'm voting for George W Bush, because only he will stop the terrorists from attacking us."
 
2012-11-06 09:16:45 PM
I got this four-minute old-man-yelling-at-cloud video from my mother this morning in one of those fwd'd emails that's reads like it was written by an folksy 8-year-old. Bonus points for it being a year and a half old.

The Brits on the Killing of Bin Laden, ...
You've got to watch this one!!! The Brits do have a way of telling things like they really are!!

The British "Commentator" returns to discuss the results of Seal Team 6 doing-in OBL and the aftermath.
The last minute is hilarious. This guy is good . Wish we had a Congress with his kind of guts.


http://dotsub.com/view/26655849-5998-4895-ac4e-3a073a16f639
 
2012-11-06 09:17:54 PM

Debeo Summa Credo: Umm, subby, I'm calling bullshiat on your headline.

/apologies if im late to the party here or you've already copped to the troll


What specifically about the headline do you find implausible? This is the election that people feel comfortable saying this in public.

/I'd post the image directly, but I've gotten in trouble once already tonight
 
2012-11-06 09:17:56 PM
I'll just report my own derp; When I voted this morning I grabbed four of those "I voted" stickers and put them all on before I got to work. When I got to the office I walked into the bullpen, and being the only Democrat in the place was all prepared when they asked why I had four stickers "I voted for Obama four times... Acorn made me do it!"
 
2012-11-06 09:22:35 PM

carterjw: Ann Rand was not a Christian philosopher.


Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not "Every man for himself." And the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, carterjw. I looked them up. 

/Apes don't read philosophy 

//Not directed at you so much as whoever needed that explained.
 
2012-11-06 09:24:39 PM

weltallica: "I'm voting for George W Bush, because only he will stop the terrorists from attacking us."


Except of course that whole unfortunate business with the anthrax attacks, but we've all agreed to just never talk about that again.
 
2012-11-06 09:29:14 PM
One of the guys I work with informed me that after he mailed in his out of state ballot his wife asked him who he voted for and then got upset when he told her. She claimed it was "both" of their vote since she had never registered ("lazy", his words not mine) and he had cast their ballot without her consent. It apparently led to quite a fight.
 
2012-11-06 09:29:56 PM

bratling: so.. my husband's family is from the south. the your brother is your uncle kind of south. i was told today, "Are you kidding? I'd rather vote for a n***** than a mormon!".
f.m.l.


I heard that some 4 plus years ago during Primary season, just replace "mormon" with "woman".
 
2012-11-06 09:32:10 PM

Mudgen: A well-educated friend sent me this derp just a little while ago.

[i1071.photobucket.com image 564x426]


"Well-educated", you sure are using that term very loosely.
 
2012-11-06 09:36:02 PM
I guarantee that if Obama is re-elected that there will be banks closing and soldiers marching in the streets of the U.S. by next Monday.
 
2012-11-06 09:36:20 PM

wendolynne: A volunteer from the Obama campaign called to ask how I planned to vote.
I said, "Green Party candidate Jill Stein."
She said, "Awesome!"


Rad. That's how I voted since WA is solidly for Obama and I wish that we had a better system than two parties dominating everything.
 
2012-11-06 09:36:39 PM
2 near derp moments from my office today:

1. Gal I work with said, yeah, I went and dropped off my ballot today. Another co-worker asked who she voted for, to which she replied, I voted for Romney, but it was my husbands vote (ie, his idea, I would guess) if I could've chosen I would've voted for someone like Gary Johnson. I had a facepalm moment. Either this gal is really dense or her husband is an ogre. Or possibly both.

2. Shortly after that exchange, another person who was outside and kind of in on the conversation started singing, just randomly, Obama, Obama, Obama.....all the way back inside. facepalm 2 moment.

/le sigh
 
2012-11-06 09:37:56 PM

roadkillontheweb: The place I work at is also a polling place. It was very busy all day but one comment that was made stood out. The voter stated that they heard on the radio if you vote a straight Democratic ticket it does not count the vote for Obama. When asked if it changed the vote to Romney she said no it just didn't register a vote for anyone in the presidential race.


That's how it works in NC.
 
2012-11-06 09:37:57 PM
Someone told me this week she is voting for Romney because no one in the military respects Obama because he is cutting military pay. When I assured her that I, still serving after 23+ years, happen to know that is not true and that I choose not to vote, she called me un-American.
 
2012-11-06 09:38:23 PM
Some angry lady on our local news channel biatching about the 3 hour wait, stating that the "It's not like they found out about this last night, they have had months to prepare for this!" hmmmm sounds like she just decided last night to vote since she didn't bother to bring a chair and a book! We've been warned for weeks at minimum that the lines would be long here in SC. Oh and they were interviewing her because she decided to leave without voting saying "I'm just another South Carolina voter who is being denied the right to vote!" Farking fool!
 
2012-11-06 09:39:58 PM
I heard on the radio that if Romney loses he is going to blame it on the hurricane. Full disclosure, it was sports talk radio.
 
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