Obama will take an early lead, until the republicans get off of work.

foxtail: Obama will take an early lead, until the republicans get off of work.

That's hilarious. Was even funnier the first 50 times I saw it. Now, go look up the amount of federal aid given to red states vs. blue. Let me know if you need help with the big words.

you libtards are gonna be sooooo pissed off

I already voted. As a liberal in Kentucky, in keeping with that same love of acts of utter futility, I will later attempt to put out a house fire by pissing on it.

No! It's a ruse! Don't post in this thread--your post only counts in the other thread!

Black panthers restrict access to Philadelphia voting locations:

 
Quick and dirty

In before his site mysteriously goes down, *right-click* + *save image as*

MachineHead: A morning thread? Some men just want to watch the world burn.

Three statisticals..

1. Marshmallows for eyeballs
2. My pants are covered in blood
3. Maggots release audible owl chirps when squeezed

Shadoe Stevens wins. You guys are gonna be soooo aroused.

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: [i.i.com.com image 620x350]

markfara: strange comment. johnson voters want him to be president. that's why you vote for someone. because you want that person to win. i want johnson to be president. that's why i'm voting for him. and if enough of us vote for him, he'll win.

I want him (Johnson) to win, that's why I'm voting for him... in 2016. Obama deserves a 2nd term -->

/
//gis obama one finger salute

DarnoKonrad: [i.imgur.com image 361x265]

Is the President near?

/too soon?

Mr. Cat Poop: Heading out to re-elect the scary black man right now.

I voted Scary black man and straight dems before it was cool on election day. By mail. Enjoy your ass frost in line.

A morning thread? Some men just want to watch the world burn.

Christie saw his failed attempt at appearing human. He was not amused.

Three statisticals:

1. The Doctor lies
2. It's bigger on the inside
3. Don't blink

Book it. Done.

/whistles innocently

Kuroshin: Schroedinger's Glory Hole: [i46.tinypic.com image 720x960] 
Quick and dirty

Got the original on that?

canwolfshadow: Flab: canwolfshadow: Flab: Weaver95: and i'm settled in at the democratic party staging area

WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO WEAVER95????!?

He's come a long way in the past 4 years has our Weaver95.

I think the Citizens United or the debt ceiling crap was the straw that broke the camel's back. He finally realised that the GOP had no interest in smaller govt, nor running the country decently.

SkullKrusher thinks he's changed his mind to impress a libbie chick.

Nah I think it's a legit framwork shift. Weav has been too anti-farkwad to be in it for the pussy.

He's been trying to get into my iPants for ages. I've told him "As long as you're a republican, my vagina is closed!"
Next I gotta tell him that I don't have a vagina

 

The Dreaded Rear Admiral: Free skink's daughter!

With the purchase of one skink's daughter of equal or lesser value.

FTDA: I don't vote a straight ticket.

I voted, but Im not sure the handy RNC voting guide door hanger sent me to the right polling place. It was very sandy, and I didn't recognize any of my neighbors.

NateGrey: Some morning reading:

Nov. 5: Late Poll Gains for Obama Leave Romney With Longer Odds

[static5.businessinsider.com image 361x265]

Romney's chances are actually up to 8.4% in the latest update.

FEEL THE MITTMENTUM

I can't wait till Nate Silver turns Joe Scarborough into a newt.

NateGrey: [www.washingtonpost.com image 228x341]

Heartbeat away from Presidency??

COME ON PEOPLE

Heartbeat more like HEART THROB amirite ladies????

Heartbeat away from Presidency??

COME ON PEOPLE

Last time i skipped an election Bush got a 2nd term - i was young naive and too stoned to go out to the polls.



Just cast my vote here in Florida, had some nice small talk with the old church ladies about how much my beard looks like their husband's. Also having previously only voted in Georgia, i had to double take at Ron Swanson on the ballot before i remembered he's a real person here - this state is so odd.

/i am ready for endless suffrage

It's wrong to have an election thread without voting enabled. I'd say that was downright undemocratic of Fark.

I just came back from the future. After Romney lost; he opened a boutique in South Beach selling his designer underwear.

Surprisingly - it became a craze. Even President Biden bought a pair.

organizmx: Anyone know what happened in the Ohio lawsuit this morning?

martial law was declared

JolobinSmokin: It's been twelve hours in the labor room and still no baby.

Looks like I won't have to pay attention to the election.

People always say babies are blessing...

Now you have to name the baby after whoever wins the presidency. Or name the opposite, Mitt is so cute when the person is not pure evil.

coco ebert: Via Infinito: coco ebert: Hai guyz.

Just got back from Obama campaign headquarters in central NJ. I was making calls and as I posted on my FB, all the little old ladies in south Philly were out in droves early in the morning. As one old Black lady told me, "We can't have Romney in office. I'm too old to pick cotton." lol

OMFG, just WOW. That is fanf*ckingtastic. My jaw actually dropped when I read that.

I f*cking love old Black women more than any other demographic group in the country. They do not play around.

Yeah, Old Black people are farking awesome. Had one in my store the other day trying to use his smart phone to take a picture of a hat for his wife:

Old Man: How does this work?
Old Man 2: I dunno, try the voice commands
Phone: What's your input?
Old Man 1: Take picture, mother farker

I might actually turn on Fox News for once, when it's apparent Obama will win, just to soak in the schadenfreude.

Who dids this

The good ol' days...

dforkus: Intrade is starting to break in Romney's direction. This is the start of a trend.

Romney's got this.

Mitt Romney
30.3%
Today's Change: -2.6

That's a funny-looking trend.

chopit: God's Hubris: Made a bet in my Fantasy Football league with the 344 Romney landslide guy from yesterday. If Obama wins, he gives me Tom Brady, if Romney wins, I give him AJ Green.

That's beautiful. Not only is his guy going to lose, he gets to watch his fantasy team stink for the rest of the season. Well played, old chap.

I made a bet with both my boss and my dad.
If Romney wins, I have to detail my boss's car and I cannot ever bring up W to my dad.
When Obama wins, my boss will detail my car, and my dad cannot ever mention Benghazi to me.

Okay, which Farker in Virginia came up with this one:

d23:
I voted for Obama, but it took some nose pinching to do it.

I wanted the Allies to win WW2, but I really had to hold my nose on that one!

Ok, who did it? =)

Pick: You can bet that after Obama looses,...

That's when I stopped reading your post and did the LOLing Facepalm.

had to get in on the fun:

My electoral map predictions...



Oh wait, that's the 1920 Warren Harding vs. James Cox election.

badaboom: Given that the electorate is about 50/50

/It's go time.

CXUnison 2012-11-06 01:12:35 PM

Long time lurker, first time poster. (Made the account last night)
I"ve lost FB friends, not spoken to relatives, and have seen far too much derp on my TV.
I've been lurking here since just before the 2008 election, and I've been here pretty much every night until 3:00AM since the GOP primaries. You've kept me sane. I finally decided to join but it took a while because of the verbal beatdown I feared I might get, but now I think I can take it. I just wanted to say that I was here, when the walls fell. I'll post something more useless later, I've got way to much crow to prepare right now.


\Be nice, or don't. It's all good.

Welcome to Fark.

Here's your kitten.



Oh, and with me you will not be requiring that crow fork.

I don't pick on people who switch parties.

Nadie_AZ: Cyberluddite: I'm glad this election's over now, because I really don't want to hear about it any more, man. And Romney's gonna win--to beleive Nate Silver's load of crap, you'd have to be a moron, I think. Yeah, Fartbama looked like he was gonna win in the early days of the campaine, but in the latter days, ain't no way he can keep that lead after his bad debate performence and Bengazi. Heres one statistical: Taxbama hasn't helped unemployment--multiple wive's, husband's, and grandparent's have lost their jobs just in the past year alone--for every one Chinese guy who got a job, an average American--a John Doe or Joe Smith--has lost his. Young college grads are having an especialy tough time, and so while Obama was able to bring in first time voters last time, this year it's Mitt whose gonna bring 'em, young and old alike. So I think Nate Silver (and guys like him) is talking out of his hat when when he gets up there and blows his golden trumpet and talks about how Fartbongo has a 90percent chance of winning. This isn't "science," its just some kinda magic--under where and what real statisticals can these results be supported? You gotta be smoking pot or taking payote or dropping LDS or something to think Obama's gonna win Ohio or Florida. I'm sure the Democrat Party bigwigs are ready to celabrate tonite, acting like they're golden, plates of lobster and bottle's of champane and all that, but their gonna be crying tomorrow when MITT ROMNEY is crowned president of the U.S. of A.!

Did I get em all?

I found one that you missed.

LOL

I need some help. I am told on good authority that Obama's re-election will usher in 1,000 years of darkness. When does that start, exactly? Is it based on CNN declaring a victor, the official tally, or inaugeration?

/trying to schedule my vacation

He_Hate_Me: [i67.photobucket.com image 600x515]

In before his site mysteriously goes down, *right-click* + *save image as*

Here is the current "unskewed" projection.



/Only a couple more hours until we can all point and laugh
//Legitimately.

Seacop: Three statisticals..

1. 30% of Hillary supporters for Romney
2. 1 in 7 undecided
3. Silent Majority

Romney wins. You guys are gonna be sooo pissed off.

THAT'S FUNNY

coeyagi: Hack Patooey: [www.thegatewaypundit.com image 366x344]

Ayn Rand's Social Worker: Seriously considered voting Jill Stein our Gary Johnson, but in the end went Obama. He deserves it, despite all my misgivings.

You hear that Republicans?! This ex-republican undecided voter just voted straight ticket Democrat for the first time ever, and I didn't like it.

But I had to. The right needs to hear that their blatant obstructionist partisanship won't stand.

This aggression won't stand, man!

Someone or something really does need to stop the bullying. Republicans AREN'T EVEN THE F*CKING PARTY IN POWER, yet they've managed to fark up passage of some very good progressive ideas within the past 4 years.

BeesNuts: Please do call the ACLU, at the very least. They are super helpful about issues like this and can tell you if you have reasonable legal footing. In 2004 I was voting absentee in PA and some shenanigans occurred. Called up the ACLU and was on the horn within 15 minutes with a gentlemen who spent the next hour or so working through my options with me.

It was amazing.

/I had no legal case as it turned out to be my fault for being a student or something, but I was still able to vote.
//I think? I pushed buttons and a box beeped at me.


Did the box give you a soda? My voting machine did!

/Chose not to vote for any of the snack candidates.

BeesNuts: Elvis_Bogart: Just vote, damn you. I don't care who you vote for, just get off your ass and do it. At least pretend to give a rat's ass.

This morning's conversation with an "undecided coworker".

"You vote yet?"
"No. I just hate them both so much."
"Yeah, It's been tough to deal with this election season for sure."
"I mean, if you can't get gas prices down, why should I vote for you?"
"Well, .. gas prices are down. Nationwide."
"Oh yeah, how convenient."
"It is because of the giant storm that knocked out the North East. They aren't buying gas at the moment which is driving down national demand. Has nothing to do with the president, it was just a point of order."
"Well, if he cared so much about jobs why'd he pass that health care bill?"

-_-

I just turned around and got to work at that point.

What your coworker was thinking: Nailed it.

Schroedinger's Glory Hole: evoke: I remember the polls favoring Kerry just before the election back in '04 as well. I voted for Bush that year - first time I was eligible to vote. In '08 I voted for McCain. So I am 1 out of 2 so far. Today I am voting for Romney and there is no doubt in my mind that he's going to win it.

You're going to be disappointed dude. Like, just found out you drunk drove into your own kid's limo on prom night disappointed.

That was a beautiful analogy.

Warthog:
Lightweights. My wife was in labor for 42 hours before they decided to cut the baby out with a knife.

After which, I assume your 12 year old son shot your wife in the head, and you had a nervous breakdown.

NateGrey: If Romney wins, God help us all.


the Nation will need an Exorcism.

evoke: I voted for Bush that year - first time I was eligible to vote.

I don't hear an apology in that post. Here, look, this is what it would sound like: It was the first time I was eligible to vote, I was young and stupid.

foxtail: Obama will take an early lead, until the republicans get off of work.


the republicans don't need to wait until they get off work. they own the store and they make their own hours, dinky.

OK, I'm not an American, so let me see if I can get the gist of this election thing.


If Obama wakes up and sees his shadow, he gets 4 more years as President? And if he dosen't, Romney becomes President?

Oh it was just AWFUL. I had to fight my way through a barricade of Black Panthers, and the voting machines would only let me choose Republicans. Worst of all, Vermin Supreme wasn't even on the ballot.

foxtail: Obama will take an early lead, until the republicans get off of work.

HAWHAWHAWHAW! IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A DEMOCRAT WITH A JOB!

Gulper Eel: I hope Gary Johnson and Jill Stein each fark up the election in one key state.

/yeah, i'm 12

You know, this is the first time -- hopefully the ONLY time -- my family and I have had so very much personally riding on a presidential election. How scary is the world and how polarized are we when a fairly typical, middle-class family quite literally is about to have their future determined by a presidential election? It makes me wonder if in my fog of TV and Project Runway and middle-class entitlement what I've missed over the years that was as critical to other families in other elections? It also makes me wonder how it is that something so high-level makes such a difference on this, the lowest level?

/I'm scared! Hold me!
//No! Don't hold me! I totally take that back!
///Off to do volunteer work.

dennysgod: Is the President near?

/too soon?



/

Elvis_Bogart: Just vote, damn you. I don't care who you vote for, just get off your ass and do it. At least pretend to give a rat's ass.

Ehy you don't votef Romney Obama either same. Where? Polls closed. Smart choicer is Libraaterian.Its easy to steel candy from your pet. But when does this also? Yes. Careful to voter machines. Absentee your vote or to stand in line with people withour soaps. Good bleeds.

Breaking update: I made coffee but I left it at home. I had to buy more when I got to work.

I also bought a muffin.

Voted this morning in Chapel Hill, NC!

/It's still a swing state to me, dammit

Theory Of Null: ¤*¨¨*¤.¸¸ ...¸.¤¤*¨¨*¤.¸¸ ...¸.¤ .¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸
\ 4 MORE BEERS!!! \
.\¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸.¸.¤* .¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸.¸.¤* .¸.¤*¨¨*
..\
☻/
/▌
/ \()



I voted!

fark, I decided to have coffee instead of beer. Now I'm all edgy.

¤*¨¨*¤.¸¸ ...¸.¤¤*¨¨*¤.¸¸ ...¸.¤ .¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸
\ 40 MORMON BEERS, still NOT DRUNK!!! \
.\¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸.¸.¤* .¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸.¸.¤* .¸.¤*¨¨*
..\
☻/
/▌
/ \()

C-SPAN is showing Dubya's acceptance speech from 2000. You know, if you need help vomiting for some reason.

¤*¨¨*¤.¸¸ ...¸.¤¤*¨¨*¤.¸¸ ...¸.¤ .¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸
\ 4 MORE BEERS!!! \
.\¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸.¸.¤* .¸.¤*¨¨*¤ .¸¸.¸.¤* .¸.¤*¨¨*
..\
☻/
/▌
/ \()

No new thread! Nobody get ready!

qorkfiend: New thread soon! Everybody get ready!



KEEP IT GOING!

*Jackson Herring

Amirite dforkus?

cameroncrazy1984: dforkus: NateGrey: dforkus: robsul82: GoldSpider: PA is still a fairly safe Obama state, so I'll probably make a statement vote for Johnson.

/huh huh "johnson".

Ehhhhhhh, just to be safe, vote Obama. Pretty please.

Another bad sign for Obama, Johnson is going to end up being this election's nader. Lot's of youth that were caught up in the Obama hysteria of 08 are going to stay home, or vote Libertarian..

It's all going to start unraveling after 7 eastern.

Please dont stop posting tonight, your tears will be needed later.

Don't you worry about that, it's going to be a joy dispensing out the comeuppance

I doubt you'll be anywhere near here when the race is called. Will you take your medicine?

Absolutely, will you take yours??
The dems just aren't motivated like they were last time, and on the flip side the Anti Obama sentiment is palpable.
Also Romney's organization/ground game is an order of magnitude better than McCain.
We'll watch the democrats' hope unravel before our eyes

IN THE POST 2000

Corvus: Then why not vote for the one of the 2 primary party candidates then if it doesn't matter?'

Waiter, could you take this back to the kitchen? It's a little heavy on the stupid.

DamnYankees: jasimo: I was just thinking....

Seeing all these pictures of long lines at polling places, and considering the open way in which some states -- I'm looking at YOU FL and OH -- have openly worked to make voting more difficult, I'm thinking that it may well have the opposite of its intended vote-squashing effect.

If I lived in a state where I knew the ruling party was actively working to discourage voting by causing long lines and constricting early voting, I would wait in line as long as needed to vote, regardless of how long it took.

Not only might it backfire in that way, but they're certainly alienating the vast majority of the country -- including just about everyone here -- who thinks that voting should be easy and EVERY vote should count.

Is there a rule about what happens if you're in line to vote when the polls close? Do they let you vote or do they shut you out?

I think all states allow everyone in line at closing time to vote. Damn sure SHOULD be the case at any rate.
/disenfranchisement/voter suppression makes me stabby

Leeds: PanicMan: Will-Mun: This thread... it's getting hard to keep up with.

Just wait till everyone gets done with work and starts drinking.

Obama supporters don't tend to work, so 50% of the posters in this thread are probably already drunk...

Obama supporter and at work.

/Also drunk
//Not really

PanicMan: Will-Mun: This thread... it's getting hard to keep up with.

Just wait till everyone gets done with work and starts drinking.

Obama supporters don't tend to work, so 50% of the posters in this thread are probably already drunk...

dforkus: You dems better hold the victory lap:

bad weather in many swing states are going to keep dems from the polls, plus the republican after work vote, it's all lining up for the GOP...

maybe I just starting take names for when the crow gets served...

What kind of a crappy job doesn't let you go out and vote? My company said go vote today if you haven't already voted. Treat someone like an adult....

jst3p: ILostMyPassword: badLogic: fruitloop: Any suggestions on whose coverage to watch tonight? I have a feeling all of them will suck, just trying to find whose will suck less.

I'm gonna watch Fox, as I want to Tivo the GOP meltdown for future enjoyment and possibly capture the first shots of the second Civil War.

If you want the real Derp tears I suggest the Tea Party News Network

Holy shiat, that is derptastic! I wish I could DVR it as I will be in class this evening.

LOL they have a live chat that I just got banned from. They were talking about the chick "reporting":


BillClinton: Show us your tits!
ttplive cleared messages from user BillClinton.
El Heat: oh, bill!
noc123: Poor Bill.
BillClinton: Come on baby, shake that thing my way
ttplive banned BillClinton.

3. Silurian Majority

 

/Vote Lizard People

skink: skullkrusher: I am getting really intrigued about this burgeoning skink's daughter meme. Anyone 'splain?

I posted a pic in the first thread of my daughter, holding up her "I Voted" sticker.

I KNOW that posting of actual children in Fark threads can be...dangerous. But, I have been here ten years, and felt pretty safe. I don't know why it caught on, but she has now been referenced quite a bit, and photoshopped. Harmless fun, because I know she has higher standards than the likes of you Farkers.

Whatever.

I thought she had sharp knees anyway.

/...
//

organizmx: Pangit: Yahoo has Romney ahead, 57%-43%

Ahead in what and where?

A front page reader poll. It basically means the election is over, Romney is reagent for life and Obama has to go on a door to door apology tour.

LOL

skink: skullkrusher: I am getting really intrigued about this burgeoning skink's daughter meme. Anyone 'splain?

I posted a pic in the first thread of my daughter, holding up her "I Voted" sticker.

I KNOW that posting of actual children in Fark threads can be...dangerous. But, I have been here ten years, and felt pretty safe. I don't know why it caught on, but she has now been referenced quite a bit, and photoshopped. Harmless fun, because I know she has higher standards than the likes of you Farkers.

hehe good man. Cute girl. Good on you to raise her to be civic minded. I already white knighted her so put in a good word, woulda?

/I kid

fenianfark: [i47.photobucket.com image 480x720]

Dude. Seriously.

fenianfark: [i47.photobucket.com image 480x720]

This is disturbing, even for Fark

Mitt Romneys Tax Return: nyrkah1: Tonight's my 20th wedding anniversary. Do I watch election coverage and disappoint my wife?

Depends. Is she going to disappoint you or are you getting an anniversary blowie?

/ Blowie > Election Results on TV

It's been 20 years. I'd be lucky if it was an outside the pants handie.

Insatiable Jesus: Blue_Blazer: Corvus: Insatiable Jesus: [www.crossed-flag-pins.com image 400x320]
Vote Obama!

[www.crossed-flag-pins.com image 400x320]
Vote Romney!


Enjoy your illusion of choice and America as a nation.

Good point other than:
Abortion
Taxes
Business regulation
Environment
Education
Gay rights
Foreign Policy
Civil liberties
Social Programs
Workers rights
Military Spending
Energy Policy
plenty of inconsequential crap

The Chinaman is not the issue here, dude, I'm talking about drawing a line in the sand, dude.

Aldon: Bf+: [media10.washingtonpost.com image 240x238]

That was mine!

/no proof.


Well, it wasn't mine...
(I only made one)
I haven't laughed this hard in a while!

moar:

Car_Ramrod: begs the question

Jim from Saint Paul: Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: [i449.photobucket.com image 500x348]

/I'm sorry but after today I can't post it anymore. And everybody said "Amen"

This picture intrigues me in ways that could be kind of emmbarassing.

But HOT.

Should she change her name from Ann to Peg?