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(Gawker)   It's Uptown vs Downtown in the impending New York City Civil War. So, who will win?   (gawker.com) divider line 120
    More: Interesting, New York City, uptown, Herald Square, Manhattan, survival skills, Travis Bickle, James Gandolfini, downtown  
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14959 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Nov 2012 at 6:12 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-05 06:13:28 AM  
Uptown. Just lock the gates and arm the maids. Downtown will be to busy blogging nonsense.
 
2012-11-05 06:19:18 AM  

Cup_O_Jo: Uptown. Just lock the gates and arm the maids. Downtown will be to busy blogging nonsense.


I don't know...I mean...Uptown you cater to a million jerks...Uptown you're messengers and mailroom clerks, eating all your lunches at the hot dog carts. The bosses take your money and they break your hearts.

Uptown you cater to a million whores.You disinfect terrazzo on their bathroom floors.

Your morning's tribulation, afternoon's a curse, and five o'clock is even worse.

So that is a lot of pent up rage.
 
2012-11-05 06:19:23 AM  
I am heading back to work in Midtown today for the first time from the Jersey shore. I will bring my Henry rifle as I will be perched high over 41st street.

/that's a joke NYPD
 
2012-11-05 06:19:41 AM  
Which side has the most guns?

/wait... New York you say? Three day slapfight and they make up after Starbucks reopens.
 
2012-11-05 06:20:37 AM  
Manhattan is an unpleasant, over-crowded, preposterously loud, foul-smelling, skyless island full of impolite people who have no sense...

Pretty much sums up the entire east coast.
 
2012-11-05 06:21:47 AM  
img805.imageshack.us
Downtown came uptown
for you.
 
2012-11-05 06:22:06 AM  
People actually live downtown?
 
2012-11-05 06:22:45 AM  
This sounds like an awesome comic book premise. Now if I could only draw. Or write. Or had any talent at all.
 
2012-11-05 06:23:54 AM  
New Yorkers fighting each other?

We all win, subby. We all win.
 
2012-11-05 06:24:18 AM  
Depends. Is the Uptown girl still living in her Uptown world?
 
2012-11-05 06:27:55 AM  
Sounds like as soon as the downtown kids get into the light and the wifi signal dings on their ipads they'll get distracted and have to check facebook and twitter...won't even be a fight.
 
2012-11-05 06:28:28 AM  

Shadowknight: This sounds like an awesome comic book premise. Now if I could only draw. Or write. Or had any talent at all.


Have you though about working for DC comics?
You may be overqualified.
 
2012-11-05 06:29:29 AM  
I'm voting for downtown. The lights are much brighter. And you forget all your troubles. Forget all your cares...

/It's sad that the reason I know those lyrics is thanks to Short Circuit 2
 
2012-11-05 06:29:32 AM  

Summoner101: Depends. Is the Uptown girl still living in her Uptown world?


You fark you so very, very much. Now I'm going to be living with that song for the rest of the day at least. Especially bad since those are the only two lyrics from the damn song I know...
 
2012-11-05 06:29:54 AM  
Downtown has electricity again. My sister's restaurant was open for Sunday brunch. Say what you will about New Yorkers, we're resilient, and we have a caring, thinking governor.
 
2012-11-05 06:30:54 AM  

way south: Which side has the most guns?


www.csmonitor.com
 
2012-11-05 06:31:19 AM  

way south: Have you though about working for DC comics?
You may be overqualified.


Well, I'm no Rob Liefeld, but I'll give it a shot!
 
2012-11-05 06:31:40 AM  
Depends, is it a contest for people who just moved there to remind non-New Yorkers about the trials and tribulations of living in New York but it's still better than any where on Earth?
 
2012-11-05 06:32:33 AM  

Shadowknight: Summoner101: Depends. Is the Uptown girl still living in her Uptown world?

You fark you so very, very much. Now I'm going to be living with that song for the rest of the day at least. Especially bad since those are the only two lyrics from the damn song I know...


Hopefully this version will supplant the Billy Joel version that's likely in your head right now.
 
2012-11-05 06:35:25 AM  

Shadowknight: Summoner101: Depends. Is the Uptown girl still living in her Uptown world?

You fark you so very, very much. Now I'm going to be living with that song for the rest of the day at least. Especially bad since those are the only two lyrics from the damn song I know...


Maybe this will help you feel better.
 
2012-11-05 06:35:35 AM  

MorrisBird: Downtown has electricity again. My sister's restaurant was open for Sunday brunch. Say what you will about New Yorkers, we're resilient, and we have a caring, thinking governor.


Speaking of governors, Gov Christie has certainly been shed in a better light in many people's eyes due to his management of the hurricane itself and the media trying to bait him.

/they probably didn't have enough bait
//they'd need a lot
///because he's fat
////I admit, I respect him more now
 
2012-11-05 06:35:48 AM  
apocalypticfilms.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-11-05 06:39:08 AM  
hunterdon, somerset, and morris counties in nj use their money to equip a professional army consisting of desperate southern/coastal jerseyians. united jersey rolls over nyc and atlantic city becomes fort bilko atlantico. its the worlds most powerful naval base and has the best hookers and blacklack too. over the next several hundred years united jersey invades 90% of countries in the world.
 
2012-11-05 06:39:25 AM  

Summoner101: Hopefully this version will supplant the Billy Joel version that's likely in your head right now.


All in all, I think I like the Billy Joel version better. Never liked the punk scene that much. Well, except for Green Day.

/ducks

The Ice Cream Man: Maybe this will help you feel better.


Not really. Though the sight of his 80s hair did make me giggle.
 
2012-11-05 06:39:26 AM  
anotherplotdevice.files.wordpress.com

What about Coney Island?
 
2012-11-05 06:43:15 AM  

abhorrent1: Manhattan is an unpleasant, over-crowded, preposterously loud, foul-smelling, skyless island full of impolite people who have no sense...

Pretty much sums up the entire east coast.


you must live in a world surrounded by warmth and light, people who find you clever and amusing and potential partners who nearly drool at how incredibly sexy they find you.

nah, not really. i'm guessing you're a miserable dooshbag twatwaffle that has no vermin in the house because even they are repulsed by you. your foul breath peels the paint from the walls and the seediest of prostitutes feel dirty from your gaze, you pinhead cocksucker. one day your wake will be attended by happy smiling people who are glad you're gone.
 
2012-11-05 06:44:22 AM  
What is this nonsense?
Funny? Not really.
Stupid? Extremely.

Who churns out this garbage?
 
2012-11-05 06:44:32 AM  
Brooklyn
 
2012-11-05 06:44:56 AM  
Well, if all else fails, they could try sawing Manhattan in half again.

/or try to get back that chest of beads and trinkets from the Lenape
 
2012-11-05 06:56:16 AM  

abhorrent1: Manhattan is an unpleasant, over-crowded, preposterously loud, foul-smelling, skyless island full of impolite people who have no sense...

Pretty much sums up the entire east coast.


I used to live on the east coast and thought it was alright. Then I moved to Montana. Have never met so many friendly and nice people.
 
2012-11-05 07:05:30 AM  
I think "who gives a shiat" will win, but I could be underestimating the sheer power of "no one outside of NY cares" uppercuts.
 
2012-11-05 07:08:26 AM  

sinistermonk: I think "who gives a shiat" will win, but I could be underestimating the sheer power of "no one outside of NY cares" uppercuts.


THIS.
 
2012-11-05 07:09:30 AM  

KrispyKritter: abhorrent1: Manhattan is an unpleasant, over-crowded, preposterously loud, foul-smelling, skyless island full of impolite people who have no sense...

Pretty much sums up the entire east coast.

you must live in a world surrounded by warmth and light, people who find you clever and amusing and potential partners who nearly drool at how incredibly sexy they find you.

nah, not really. i'm guessing you're a miserable dooshbag twatwaffle that has no vermin in the house because even they are repulsed by you. your foul breath peels the paint from the walls and the seediest of prostitutes feel dirty from your gaze, you pinhead cocksucker. one day your wake will be attended by happy smiling people who are glad you're gone.


Ronburgundy.jpg
 
2012-11-05 07:10:52 AM  
FTA: Staten Island Ferry means that Downtown would have a superior navy.

I've got nothing witty to add; this was kinda funny, I didn't get the rest of it.
 
2012-11-05 07:11:47 AM  

sinistermonk: I think "who gives a shiat" will win, but I could be underestimating the sheer power of "no one outside of NY cares" uppercuts.


I only care because I praying for mutual assured destruction.
 
2012-11-05 07:12:30 AM  

Wobambo: abhorrent1: Manhattan is an unpleasant, over-crowded, preposterously loud, foul-smelling, skyless island full of impolite people who have no sense...

Pretty much sums up the entire east coast.

I used to live on the east coast and thought it was alright. Then I moved to Montana. Have never met so many friendly and nice people.


Did you become a dental floss tycoon?
 
2012-11-05 07:15:18 AM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: [img805.imageshack.us image 220x261]
Downtown came uptown
for you.


Came here for David Wilcox reference and leaving satisfied.
 
2012-11-05 07:26:09 AM  
Nuke the entire site from Orbit, its the only way to be sure
 
2012-11-05 07:26:23 AM  
You know, if I had known global warming would shift hurricanes farther north and cause things like this, I would have started burning tires in my back yard loooong before I actually did.
 
2012-11-05 07:29:05 AM  

MorrisBird: Downtown has electricity again. My sister's restaurant was open for Sunday brunch. Say what you will about New Yorkers, we're resilient, and we have a caring, thinking governor.


Yep, if a hurricane had hit anyplace else in the world the entire population would have laid down in the streets and waited for wolves and bobcats to come eat them. Way to bounce back. You're truly a unique people.
 
2012-11-05 07:39:29 AM  

Aar1012: Cup_O_Jo: Uptown. Just lock the gates and arm the maids. Downtown will be to busy blogging nonsense.

I don't know...I mean...Uptown you cater to a million jerks...Uptown you're messengers and mailroom clerks, eating all your lunches at the hot dog carts. The bosses take your money and they break your hearts.

Uptown you cater to a million whores.You disinfect terrazzo on their bathroom floors.

Your morning's tribulation, afternoon's a curse, and five o'clock is even worse.

So that is a lot of pent up rage.


cache.gawker.com

/Sing it, child.
 
2012-11-05 07:39:51 AM  
Uptown.

Our pre-war apartment buildings are impenetrable fortresses.
 
2012-11-05 07:40:46 AM  
I think downtown will win.
s7.postimage.org
 
2012-11-05 07:41:56 AM  
i2.listal.com 

I guess downtown, cuz this.
 
2012-11-05 07:43:56 AM  

StrikitRich: [anotherplotdevice.files.wordpress.com image 494x303]

What about Coney Island?


Warriors ... Come out and swim. Warriors, come out and swiiiiiim.
 
2012-11-05 07:53:21 AM  
I do not understand the animosity in this thread toward the east coast. What did we ever do to hurt you?
 
2012-11-05 07:54:45 AM  

sinistermonk: I think "who gives a shiat" will win, but I could be underestimating the sheer power of "no one outside of NY cares" uppercuts.


And here you are, putting effort in to not caring. What's nice about us owning the media is that you have to care.
 
2012-11-05 07:55:46 AM  

herrDrFarkenstein: [i2.listal.com image 333x270] 

I guess downtown, cuz this.


I was coming in here to ask whether this will involve stovepipe hats and rabbits on sticks.
 
2012-11-05 07:56:12 AM  

AlwaysRightBoy: Wobambo: abhorrent1: Manhattan is an unpleasant, over-crowded, preposterously loud, foul-smelling, skyless island full of impolite people who have no sense...

Pretty much sums up the entire east coast.

I used to live on the east coast and thought it was alright. Then I moved to Montana. Have never met so many friendly and nice people.

Did you become a dental floss tycoon?


I haven't worked down that far on my itemized agenda.
 
2012-11-05 07:56:48 AM  

MorrisBird: Downtown has electricity again. My sister's restaurant was open for Sunday brunch. Say what you will about New Yorkers, we're resilient, and we have a caring, thinking governor.


Man, we could have used one of those during Katrina. Instead, we had an idiot savant.
 
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