Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(OK Magazine)   No. For the love of God. Nooooooooooooooo   ( ok.co.uk) divider line
    More: Stupid, god, Jamie Bell, Zac Efron, George Lucas  
•       •       •

19283 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 04 Nov 2012 at 1:33 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



127 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2012-11-04 10:23:10 AM  
If the original actors are too old and frumpy looking to play heroes, then write the script with them as old and frumpy looking, and have them be elder mentors to new "hero" characters.

Honestly, If you can't get something that basic and obvious right, then you're an incompetent moron and have no business working on movies. Go get a hairnet and a nametag, and learn to love the smell of french fries.
 
2012-11-04 11:02:14 AM  
Are these new movies going to follow Lucas' original plan for them?

I really hope they aren't going to "reboot" 4-6.
 
2012-11-04 11:46:33 AM  
We are now officially in the End Times.
 
2012-11-04 12:42:46 PM  

bloobeary: If the original actors are too old and frumpy looking to play heroes, then write the script with them as old and frumpy looking, and have them be elder mentors to new "hero" characters.

Honestly, If you can't get something that basic and obvious right, then you're an incompetent moron and have no business working on movies. Go get a hairnet and a nametag, and learn to love the smell of french fries.


Oh, I"m almost certain that Disney execs do not want where hair nets. They'll come around.
 
2012-11-04 12:45:52 PM  
*DarthVaderdonotwant.jpg*
 
2012-11-04 01:13:08 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-04 01:38:32 PM  
Sure - the people who cast the Avengers so brilliantly are going to go with a douchey C-List teen actor to play one of the most iconic characters of all time, almost instantly damming their 4 billion dollar deal to utter ruin. Sorry ... not buying it. I think someone is passing around a story they read on The Onion.
 
2012-11-04 01:38:34 PM  

Dumski: bloobeary: If the original actors are too old and frumpy looking to play heroes, then write the script with them as old and frumpy looking, and have them be elder mentors to new "hero" characters.

Honestly, If you can't get something that basic and obvious right, then you're an incompetent moron and have no business working on movies. Go get a hairnet and a nametag, and learn to love the smell of french fries.

Oh, I"m almost certain that Disney execs do not want where hair nets. They'll come around.


Yeah, but what's to stop them from LeBeefing up the new generation of heroes? You know, like Indy?
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-11-04 01:39:08 PM  
fc01.deviantart.net
 
2012-11-04 01:39:28 PM  
Why not? He's just as young and cute as Mark Hamill was in the original.

Never mind. I'll just let this go to the hundreds of outraged comments of Star Wars fanboys.
 
2012-11-04 01:40:42 PM  
Love the subheadline: "George Lucas causes by selling the rights to his franchise, Episode 7, 8 and 9". Ha!
 
2012-11-04 01:43:20 PM  
Mark Hamill is the same age as Yoda when two thousand years old look as good you will not.
 
2012-11-04 01:43:39 PM  
We're talking Disney, so just count on Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel playing Luke & Leia, Dax Shepard as Han and since he'll need the work, Barrack Obama as Lando.
 
2012-11-04 01:44:29 PM  
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera
 
2012-11-04 01:45:00 PM  
He'll be the new Hamill? He's already the new Travolta.

/hem hem
 
2012-11-04 01:45:11 PM  
i699.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-04 01:47:11 PM  
AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.
 
2012-11-04 01:49:07 PM  
FTA: "According to bookies..."

Sounds legit.
 
2012-11-04 01:49:29 PM  
Yeah, this will happen.. Just like how Leo Dicaprio became Anakin...

/though, might have been a better movie..
 
2012-11-04 01:51:43 PM  

AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera


orclover: AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.


Seriously, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Go find something better to do with your lives
 
2012-11-04 01:52:33 PM  

StrikitRich: We're talking Disney, so just count on Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel playing Luke & Leia, Dax Shepard as Han and since he'll need the work, Barrack Obama as Lando.


I dunno, but now that you mention it I'd love to see Jessica Biel in a slave Leia outfit.
 
2012-11-04 01:54:21 PM  

AntonChigger: AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera

orclover: AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.

Seriously, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Go find something better to do with your lives


That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.
 
2012-11-04 01:56:47 PM  

AbiNormal: AntonChigger: AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera

orclover: AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.

Seriously, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Go find something better to do with your lives

That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.


I'm not really a Star Wars nerd, just trying to understand why something so unimportant makes you so mad

/or why you waste this much time trolling
 
2012-11-04 01:59:31 PM  
Corey Feldman as Skywalker, the Hoff as Solo and Kirstie Alley as Leia.

You're welcome.
 
2012-11-04 02:01:54 PM  
Hugh Jackman as Han Solo...

Scarlett Johanson as Princess Leia..

Aaron Paul as Luke Skywalker... biatch!
 
2012-11-04 02:03:34 PM  
Seems highly unlikely.

Disney is going to want to go with a more billable star, especially to help overcome fan skepticism (to appease anxious fans, I'd imagine they're going to try and have at least Mark Hammill return -- and why not take advantage of the fact that he's still around?).

Further, Disney has already stated that they want to see to a quick return on their $4BN investment -- this film needs to make at least $1BN at the worldwide box office.

And after "John Carter" -- Taylor who? -- I expect Disney to be a lot more careful about the casting.
 
2012-11-04 02:04:00 PM  
actually, I'd totally pay to see the original Star Wars played with the actors from Breaking Bad... Thatd be awesome.

/George Lucas could've spent some of that $4 billion to make that happen.
 
2012-11-04 02:04:54 PM  

AbiNormal: That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.


Says the person on Fark...

Anywho, Zac may not be the world's greatest actor, but he's better than Jake Lloyd or Hayden Christensen, so that already makes the new movie(s) better than Episodes 1-3.
 
2012-11-04 02:05:30 PM  
This line gave me hives:

The 25-year-old self-confessed Star Wars addict previously said he'd love to don his best 'I've lost my arm' face and battle Darth Vader,

Vader's dead, you Star Wars addict, you.
 
2012-11-04 02:05:45 PM  
Tyler Perry = Grand Moff Tarkin

Tyler Perry's ego = Death Star
 
2012-11-04 02:07:56 PM  
I'd have the next film pick up where part 3 ended. There's an 18 year gap between the ending of part 3 and part 4 that needs to be filled in.
 
2012-11-04 02:11:07 PM  

AntonChigger: AbiNormal: AntonChigger: AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera

orclover: AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.

Seriously, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Go find something better to do with your lives

That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.

I'm not really a Star Wars nerd, just trying to understand why something so unimportant makes you so mad

/or why you waste this much time trolling


Why are you getting so bent out of shape about what I post? And it doesn't make me mad, it makes me laugh.
 
2012-11-04 02:12:30 PM  
There's no possible way they'd be stupid enough to reboot 3-5 instead of going in a whole new direction, right?

I mean, nobody is that idiotic and unorigi---


Damn
 
2012-11-04 02:14:33 PM  
Cast relative unknowns, except for a few supporting roles.
 
2012-11-04 02:14:51 PM  

bulldg4life: There's no possible way they'd be stupid enough to reboot 3-5 instead of going in a whole new direction, right?

I mean, nobody is that idiotic and unorigi---


Damn


well, knowing Disney, there will be episode 3 1/2, or 4 2/3 like they did with did he Lion King movies.
 
2012-11-04 02:14:54 PM  
Could we please have HAN SOLO: The Animated Series instead?

/With scripts by Paul Dini, Production Design by Bruce Timm.
 
2012-11-04 02:17:05 PM  
FTFA: According to bookies William Hill

One guy is bookies now? No source on where known gossip rag got this? Pass.

Then there's this gem..

But he won't be alone in the battle, with Jamie Bell, Shia Leboeuf and Ryan Reynolds all in line.

Meanwhile, Ryan is also the favourite to play Han Solo while Emma Stone is top choice for Princess Leia.


Uh huh. Listen guys, why don't we wait for the farking ink to dry on the contract before we start believing every half baked rumor that will be circling the internets, mmmkay?

/ at least I know how to get an instant green for the next 2 years
 
2012-11-04 02:18:40 PM  

AbiNormal: That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.


Either you need to be at the gym in 26 minutes, or you just let slip that Sarah Jessica Parker will make a cameo as a tauntaun.
 
2012-11-04 02:19:28 PM  

Popcorn Johnny: I'd have the next film pick up where part 3 ended. There's an 18 year gap between the ending of part 3 and part 4 that needs to be filled in.


Why the hell would you intentionally try to shoehorn in three movies for something where everyone knows how it will end?

The only thing you are destined to do is annoy people with continuity problems and remind them that Episode 4 is coming up.

They could bring back Luke and have him be in the first 20 minutes as an older Obi Wan type guy....hand off the series to new people and go from there.
 
2012-11-04 02:19:59 PM  

alwaysjaded: FTFA: According to bookies William HillOne guy is bookies now? No source on where known gossip rag got this? Pass.


William Hill is the name of a chain of betting shops.
 
2012-11-04 02:20:17 PM  

alwaysjaded: FTFA: According to bookies William Hill

One guy is bookies now? No source on where known gossip rag got this? Pass.

Then there's this gem..

But he won't be alone in the battle, with Jamie Bell, Shia Leboeuf and Ryan Reynolds all in line.

Meanwhile, Ryan is also the favourite to play Han Solo while Emma Stone is top choice for Princess Leia.

Uh huh. Listen guys, why don't we wait for the farking ink to dry on the contract before we start believing every half baked rumor that will be circling the internets, mmmkay?

/ at least I know how to get an instant green for the next 2 years


Thank you. You are this thread's Rally to Restore Sanity.
 
2012-11-04 02:24:56 PM  

Gordon Bennett: alwaysjaded: FTFA: According to bookies William HillOne guy is bookies now? No source on where known gossip rag got this? Pass.

William Hill is the name of a chain of betting shops.


Fair enough. I did not know that. Regardless, I would at least wait till they have an outline of a story written before they start the casting rumors. No one even knows what direction the sequels are going yet.
 
2012-11-04 02:26:04 PM  
So wait, they haven't even finished inking the deal itself and all it's details and suddenly there's a casting list? I call bullshiat. You folks are gullible as hell.
 
2012-11-04 02:27:57 PM  
*clicks link*

What the.....?

images.sodahead.com
 
2012-11-04 02:28:18 PM  

Erisire:

Thank you. You are this thread's Rally to Restore Sanity.


Yea. I just sincerely doubt that DIsney is going to spend all that money on a franchise only to just rush something out with flavors of the month from years ago. I would at least anticipate they would have a few meetings first on just what they are going to do with it.
 
2012-11-04 02:28:42 PM  

AbiNormal: AntonChigger: AbiNormal: AntonChigger: AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera

orclover: AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.

Seriously, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Go find something better to do with your lives

That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.

I'm not really a Star Wars nerd, just trying to understand why something so unimportant makes you so mad

/or why you waste this much time trolling

Why are you getting so bent out of shape about what I post? And it doesn't make me mad, it makes me laugh.


I guess I just don't get how someone could have any reason to hate Star Wars that much
 
2012-11-04 02:29:56 PM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Kirstie Alley as Leia.


I think she qualifies for Hutt status now.


How this should work out is get Mark, Harrison and Carrie back for at least quick cameos. Show Mark as Luke for a few scenes talking about the Jedi to new Jedi while Han hands over the Falcon to the kids while Leia does something diplomatic or something.
 
2012-11-04 02:32:39 PM  

alwaysjaded: Gordon Bennett: alwaysjaded: FTFA: According to bookies William HillOne guy is bookies now? No source on where known gossip rag got this? Pass.

William Hill is the name of a chain of betting shops.

Fair enough. I did not know that. Regardless, I would at least wait till they have an outline of a story written before they start the casting rumors. No one even knows what direction the sequels are going yet.


Bookies like taking money from idiots who place bets on actors before a script has even been written.
 
2012-11-04 02:32:45 PM  
This is why we can't have nice things.
 
2012-11-04 02:33:26 PM  
Honestly, you can't fark up Star Wars any more than the prequels did. Hayden Christiansen as Darth Vader? Sam Jackson as a Jedi? The whole thing was like a long Mad TV parody.
 
2012-11-04 02:33:45 PM  
weknowmemes.com
 
2012-11-04 02:35:09 PM  

elvindeath: Sure - the people who cast the Avengers so brilliantly are going to go with a douchey C-List teen actor to play one of the most iconic characters of all time, almost instantly damming their 4 billion dollar deal to utter ruin. Sorry ... not buying it. I think someone is passing around a story they read on The Onion.


Well its just a bookie saying that, I didn't know you could even bet on shiat like that in England, strange place....

They would never cast him, simply because its stupid and he can't farking act at all, my bet is Ryan Reynolds as Han, some other unknown or maybe one of those kids from the twilight series as Luke, and khloe kardasian as chewbacca.
 
2012-11-04 02:35:23 PM  

AbiNormal: AntonChigger: AbiNormal: AntonChigger: AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera

orclover: AAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *CHOKE, GASP* AHAHAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHA.

You farking idiots had so much hope that this deal was going to be a good thing. CHOKE ON YOUR TEARS AND DIE!!!!!

/i had no hope, I never had hope.

Seriously, who pissed in your cereal this morning? Go find something better to do with your lives

That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.

I'm not really a Star Wars nerd, just trying to understand why something so unimportant makes you so mad

/or why you waste this much time trolling

Why are you getting so bent out of shape about what I post? And it doesn't make me mad, it makes me laugh.


Sorta like when a grownup jingles his keys?
 
2012-11-04 02:35:26 PM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Sam Jackson as a Jedi?


Hey now, what was wrong with Samuel L. Jackson as Jedi?
 
2012-11-04 02:36:24 PM  
Hey guys, remember how when The Dark Knight came out, like how literally the next day the internet exploded with "totally official, no joke! Rumors" about how Johnny Depp and Phillip Seymour Hoffman were gonna be the Riddler and the Penguin in the third Nolan Batman movie? That totally happened, right?
 
2012-11-04 02:37:04 PM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Honestly, you can't fark up Star Wars any more than the prequels did. Hayden Christiansen as Darth Vader? Sam Jackson as a Jedi? The whole thing was like a long Mad TV parody.


I like motherfarkin Samuel L. Jackson as much as the next guy, but someone like Lawrence Fishburne would've been a much better choice
 
2012-11-04 02:38:34 PM  
In all seriousness, casting a generic pretty-boy with no real acting chops in the part would actually make it a better match for the first trilogy, not a worse one. Luke's just the blank placeholder for audience relatability a la Bella Swan, all the actual interesting characters were supporting actors, under seven inches of makeup, welded into a metal can -- pick two.

In fact, probably the main reason the prequels didn't work was that they forgot that Vader was one of those awesome supporting characters welded in a tin can, and instead cast his character with an audience placeholder instead because he was trying to remake the original stories rather than do an actual prequel.

Teufelaffe: so that already makes the new movie(s) better than Episodes 1-3.


Which means that they could still potentially be worse than being stabbed in the neck with a pencil and bleeding to death.
 
2012-11-04 02:39:53 PM  
I'm sorry, are we pretending that Mark Hamill was anything other than a terrible actor in those movies?
 
2012-11-04 02:41:59 PM  

GavinTheAlmighty: I'm sorry, are we pretending that Mark Hamill was anything other than a terrible actor in those movies?


But he just wanted to go to Toshi station to pick up those power converters!!!

/you read that in Mark Hamill's voice, admit it
 
2012-11-04 02:42:56 PM  

Flint Ironstag:

Bookies like taking money from idiots who place bets on actors before a script has even been written.


And they are about to make a farking killing with every body wanting to get the next scoop for their blogs.

"Hey guys, get this. An anonymous source told me that Disney is casting Tom Brady as a Sith Lord and the whole movie will begin at the end and work backwards. You heard it here first."

ThatBillmanGuy: Hey guys, remember how when The Dark Knight came out, like how literally the next day the internet exploded with "totally official, no joke! Rumors" about how Johnny Depp and Phillip Seymour Hoffman were gonna be the Riddler and the Penguin in the third Nolan Batman movie? That totally happened, right?


Or when Batman was going to die halfway through and the second half of the movie was going to be JGL as Nightwing? Yep.
 
2012-11-04 02:48:25 PM  

AntonChigger: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Honestly, you can't fark up Star Wars any more than the prequels did. Hayden Christiansen as Darth Vader? Sam Jackson as a Jedi? The whole thing was like a long Mad TV parody.

I like motherfarkin Samuel L. Jackson as much as the next guy, but someone like Lawrence Fishburne would've been a much better choice


Samuel L Jackson could have been an awesome Jedi had he been given anything decent to do. Episode 1 he was out preformed by a muppet. Episodes two and three he only had one fight scene per movie and the rest of the time he was scene sitting down not saying a whole lot. Hell, Boba Fett did more in Episode 2 than Jackson did in all three movies.
 
2012-11-04 02:48:40 PM  

derpy: This line gave me hives:

The 25-year-old self-confessed Star Wars addict previously said he'd love to don his best 'I've lost my arm' face and battle Darth Vader,

Vader's dead, you Star Wars addict, you.



Not if they reboot it. This is Disney we're talking about. We're going to get Selina Gomez as Princess Leia, Shia LeBeef as Han Solo, Zack Galickafarkness as Chewbacca, Justin Bieber as Lando Calrissian?
 
2012-11-04 02:50:52 PM  
This whole thing just gets funnier with each greenlight.
 
2012-11-04 02:57:06 PM  
But he won't be alone in the battle, with Jamie Bell, Shia Leboeuf and Ryan Reynolds all in line.

Meanwhile, Ryan is also the favourite to play Han Solo while Emma Stone is top choice for Princess Leia.


Jesus farking Christ
 
2012-11-04 03:02:32 PM  

bloobeary: If the original actors are too old and frumpy looking to play heroes, then write the script with them as old and frumpy looking, and have them be elder mentors to new "hero" characters.

Honestly, If you can't get something that basic and obvious right, then you're an incompetent moron and have no business working on movies. Go get a hairnet and a nametag, and learn to love the smell of french fries.


Done in one.
 
2012-11-04 03:02:57 PM  

ds_4815: AbiNormal: That's what I've been telling you whinny, sniveling star wars nerds for years.

Either you need to be at the gym in 26 minutes, or you just let slip that Sarah Jessica Parker will make a cameo as a tauntaun.


Shhhh, nobody is supposed to know.
 
2012-11-04 03:08:36 PM  

AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera


YOU ARE SOOOOOO COOOOOLLLLLL!!!
 
2012-11-04 03:08:41 PM  
Princess Leia: Anna Kendrick

reelmovienation.com

Han Solo: Chris Hemsworth

img2-1.timeinc.net

Luke Skywalker: Joseph Gorden Levitt

content6.flixster.com


/Quick list better than mentioned in the article.
 
2012-11-04 03:10:07 PM  

Rocket To Russia: AbiNormal: Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahah *GASP* Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha................. ....heheheh.....snort....
Star Wars farking sucks to begin with so it makes perfect sense to cast that anemic idiot.

/farking worthless soap opera

YOU ARE SOOOOOO COOOOOLLLLLL!!!


I know.
 
2012-11-04 03:17:46 PM  

crypticsatellite: Are these new movies going to follow Lucas' original plan for them?

I really hope they aren't going to "reboot" 4-6.



You mean you don't want Samuel L. Jackson saying "These are not the mother-****ing droids you're looking for"?
 
2012-11-04 03:19:33 PM  

Johnsnownw: Princess Leia: Anna Kendrick

[reelmovienation.com image 264x379]

Han Solo: Chris Hemsworth

[img2-1.timeinc.net image 240x320]

Luke Skywalker: Joseph Gorden Levitt

[content6.flixster.com image 280x250]

/Quick list better than mentioned in the article.


www.bromygod.com
 
2012-11-04 03:21:11 PM  

skinbubble: Johnsnownw: Princess Leia: Anna Kendrick

[reelmovienation.com image 264x379]

Han Solo: Chris Hemsworth

[img2-1.timeinc.net image 240x320]

Luke Skywalker: Joseph Gorden Levitt

[content6.flixster.com image 280x250]

/Quick list better than mentioned in the article.

[www.bromygod.com image 625x478]


They're not going to do a reboot. They could literally adapt any space opera, throw in some lightsabers and a cameo from Yoda or two and make billions. It's not worth losing the marketability of a box set of three trilogies.
 
2012-11-04 03:23:22 PM  

thornhill: And after "John Carter" -- Taylor who? -- I expect Disney to be a lot more careful about the casting.


John Carter wasn't a bad movie, IMHO. I liked it. It wouldn't surprise me if it develops a following in the future....

/ horrible marketing by Disney, however
 
2012-11-04 03:25:14 PM  
... damn you Faust. Another one of your bargains goes awry!
 
2012-11-04 03:25:41 PM  
Skip a generation. Bring back Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill, Billy Dee Williams and Harrison Ford to appear as their original characters, but with Luke as now a wise, older jedi, Han and Lando as retired generals and Leia as senior politician (like Hilary Clinton). Bring in new characters, perhaps their kids or padawans. So, those original characters wouldn't do much action stuff, but just be characters in the story (like Alec Guinness was as Obi-Wan).

And put John Lasseter in charge of it all, hire Joe Cornish and Edgar Wright to write it. Get Garth Jennings to direct it. And do as little as you have to in terms of consulting George Lucas.
 
2012-11-04 03:28:09 PM  

farkeruk: Skip a generation. Bring back Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill, Billy Dee Williams and Harrison Ford to appear as their original characters, but with Luke as now a wise, older jedi, Han and Lando as retired generals and Leia as senior politician (like Hilary Clinton). Bring in new characters, perhaps their kids or padawans. So, those original characters wouldn't do much action stuff, but just be characters in the story (like Alec Guinness was as Obi-Wan).

And put John Lasseter in charge of it all, hire Joe Cornish and Edgar Wright to write it. Get Garth Jennings to direct it. And do as little as you have to in terms of consulting if George Lucas gets within 1000 yards drive him off with a cattle prod.



FTFY
 
2012-11-04 03:29:39 PM  
I felt a great disturbance in the force, as if millions of of fans cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

if this happens minds and shiat will be lost on starwars web forums.
 
2012-11-04 03:38:12 PM  
What's really going to happen is Star Cars...a remake of all 6 movies with all of the characters as cars. It will feature an all-star voice cast:

Owen Wilson as Luke
Selena Gomez as Leia
Patton Oswalt as Han Solo
Joan Rivers as Chewbacca
Chris Rock as Lando
Chuck Norris as Darth Vader
Betty White as The Emperor
Christian Bale as C3P0
Larry the Cable Guy as R2D2
with special appearances of Sir Sean Connery as Jabba and Sir Ian McKellan as Salacious Crumb
 
2012-11-04 03:48:16 PM  
But will they be lopping off 2 fingers and making him wear white gloves to keep with Disney canon?

ELIO!
 
2012-11-04 03:48:33 PM  
The executives are targeting the demographics of people who watch Star Wars (young kids), not 30-40 something neck breads who still haven't let go of their childhood.
 
2012-11-04 03:49:11 PM  
Fark you, Disney
 
2012-11-04 03:58:52 PM  

bloobeary: Could we please have HAN SOLO: The Animated Series instead?

/With scripts by Paul Dini, Production Design by Bruce Timm.


MMuch as i like them, I'd give this project to gennedy tartakovsky. He made the good clone wars stuff
 
2012-11-04 04:00:48 PM  

Fallout Boy: The executives are targeting the demographics of people who watch Star Wars (young kids), not 30-40 something neck breads who still haven't let go of their childhood.


Neck Breads?
 
2012-11-04 04:01:40 PM  
Wow, lots of butt-hurt in this thread. I'll bet you $1 billion theoretical internet dollars that Zac Efron will not be in the next Star Wars movie. Some random bookie is a less reliable source than tabloid rags.
 
2012-11-04 04:15:34 PM  
Are people really this idiotic?

Just because The Walt Disney Corp bought LucasFilm doesn't mean the movies are now going to be Disney (kids stuff) like. The Disney kids is just a portion of their corporation.

You know what else they own?

ABC for example.

You know what else? Touchstone. I bet you've watched a lot of good and adult movies made by that studio.

And you know what else? Miramax (well, used to). DISNEY DISTRIBUTED farkING PULP FICTION.

Now shut up you cocks about things being kidified.
 
2012-11-04 04:16:44 PM  

rocky_howard: And you know what else? Miramax (well, used to). DISNEY DISTRIBUTED farkING PULP FICTION.



Say 'what' again
 
2012-11-04 04:30:05 PM  

vpb: [fc01.deviantart.net image 400x600]


Beautiful! Been thinking this all week.
 
2012-11-04 04:31:11 PM  
Wait, wasn't Luke kind of a douchey brat in Star Wars? Sounds like perfect casting to me.

Now, if he had been cast as Han, that'd be another story.
 
2012-11-04 04:35:11 PM  
Okay, I want everyone to line up. Anyone who believes this story will step forward. Someone will be around shortly to kick you in the nuts as hard as humanly possible as punishment for being so goddamned stupid.

Red Flag 1: story is from a gossip site that is the modern equivalent of the National Inquirer.
Red Flag 2: story is unsourced. The best you get is "oddsmakers." Which ones? Vegas? Reno? Larry in mail room?
Red Flag 3: The deal won't be finalized until the end of the year. They only have an outline. They've already said that they don't have a screenwriter or director yet. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is in place to even begin casting yet.

The article is based on pure speculation an deserves, at best, to be ignored.
 
2012-11-04 04:39:22 PM  
bwahahaha! grow up.
 
2012-11-04 04:44:07 PM  

crypticsatellite: Are these new movies going to follow Lucas' original plan for them?

I really hope they aren't going to "reboot" 4-6.


Oh, I'm sure they are. Everything gets a gritty reboot these days.
 
2012-11-04 04:48:26 PM  
If they were trying for an actor even crappier and gayer (NTTAWWT) than Hayden Christiansen, then they certainly succeeded beyond all expectations.
 
2012-11-04 05:00:54 PM  
Disney's going to fark that up now, too.
 
2012-11-04 05:04:10 PM  
I wonder what kind of rides Disney will add to Disney World and Disneyland after the new movies start coming out.
 
2012-11-04 05:16:59 PM  

bloobeary: If the original actors are too old and frumpy looking to play heroes, then write the script with them as old and frumpy looking, and have them be elder mentors to new "hero" characters.

Honestly, If you can't get something that basic and obvious right, then you're an incompetent moron and have no business working on movies. Go get a hairnet and a nametag, and learn to love the smell of french fries.


This. Yoda already warned "look as good you will not"; they might as well roll with it. It's not like they haven't had older mentors to younger heroes before, even going across generations when necessary. Why not continue the theme?
 
2012-11-04 05:19:24 PM  

rocky_howard: Are people really this idiotic?

Just because The Walt Disney Corp bought LucasFilm doesn't mean the movies are now going to be Disney (kids stuff) like. The Disney kids is just a portion of their corporation.

You know what else they own?

ABC for example.

You know what else? Touchstone. I bet you've watched a lot of good and adult movies made by that studio.

And you know what else? Miramax (well, used to). DISNEY DISTRIBUTED farkING PULP FICTION.

Now shut up you cocks about things being kidified.


This, so many times over.

/also demands a copy
 
2012-11-04 05:20:05 PM  
This might actually get my daughter to watch a scifi movie with me.


Imagine the outrage if it was Shia Labouf.
 
2012-11-04 05:20:15 PM  
ReBooting episode 4 would almost Be worth it just see the nerd rage. They just spent 4B on this. They're going to make it as universally appealing as they can well making sure they can sell shiatloads of toys. Angry 40 year olds aren't going to like the movies. They may make lower risk properties, like a TV series or two that are targeted towards and older crowd however the movies are likely to dissapoint. i
 
kth
2012-11-04 05:23:44 PM  
FTFA: According to bookies William Hill, Zac is the favourite to take on the epic role.

I read that as wookies.
 
2012-11-04 05:27:30 PM  
Kristen Stewart as Leia.
 
2012-11-04 05:33:15 PM  
Nathan Fillion as Han Solo?
 
kth
2012-11-04 05:34:03 PM  

AntonChigger: GavinTheAlmighty: I'm sorry, are we pretending that Mark Hamill was anything other than a terrible actor in those movies?

But he just wanted to go to Toshi station to pick up those power converters!!!

/you read that in Mark Hamill's voice, admit it


Much whining in him, like his father.
 
2012-11-04 05:40:37 PM  
I called it.

They're not looking to create a Star Wars movie. They're looking to create a Twilight style franchise. They're not going to cast actual actors, just flavor of the month pop stars.
 
2012-11-04 06:00:28 PM  

MBTAhole: Kristen Stewart as Leia.


media.tumblr.com 

"That's a joke, right?"
 
2012-11-04 06:39:49 PM  
I don't know what else this Efron kid's done, but he wasn't that bad in Firefly.
 
2012-11-04 07:12:08 PM  
Casting Leia is simple...

i296.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-04 07:13:13 PM  
Uh.

If you consider the original trilogy, only Guinness had a three-stars career before that (and he hated Star Wars, which he considered dumb) and only Ford had a three-stars career after that.
And half of Ford's acting consists in looking as if he's lost his car keys and is looking around for them, the other half consisting in bearing a shiat eating grin.

His most noticed performances post-SW were Shiat eating grin-bearing Dr Jones and Regarding Henry in which his character takes a bullet to the head and spends one hour and a half looking for his keys. (am I trying too hard?)

People should worry about having a good story, instead. The rest will follow.
/BTW, Efron's CV is not half bad for an actor his age.

- dye Al Pacino in green and have him play Yoda "Why d'you kiss your sister, Luke? Cause she's got A GREAT ASS..." 
- NPH as Han Solo
- the Old Spice guy as Calrissian
- Stewart and Pattinson as Leila and Luke
- Rupert Sanders as Vader and wait for Pattinson's reaction as he takes the helmet off
 
2012-11-04 07:26:17 PM  
theo nly thing the prequel movie got right was the clones executing order 66
 
2012-11-04 07:57:28 PM  

Dancis_Frake: Uh.

If you consider the original trilogy, only Guinness had a three-stars career before that (and he hated Star Wars, which he considered dumb) and only Ford had a three-stars career after that.
And half of Ford's acting consists in looking as if he's lost his car keys and is looking around for them, the other half consisting in bearing a shiat eating grin.

His most noticed performances post-SW were Shiat eating grin-bearing Dr Jones and Regarding Henry in which his character takes a bullet to the head and spends one hour and a half looking for his keys. (am I trying too hard?)

People should worry about having a good story, instead. The rest will follow.
/BTW, Efron's CV is not half bad for an actor his age.

- dye Al Pacino in green and have him play Yoda "Why d'you kiss your sister, Luke? Cause she's got A GREAT ASS..." 
- NPH as Han Solo
- the Old Spice guy as Calrissian
- Stewart and Pattinson as Leila and Luke
- Rupert Sanders as Vader and wait for Pattinson's reaction as he takes the helmet off


Great point. Star Wars was such a large and loved movie before it was ever released that they could cast anyo...oh, wait? You mean that the movie became a hit after it was released so your logic of casting makes no sense in an established franchise that can (and should) have decent actors?
 
2012-11-04 08:02:22 PM  

Popcorn Johnny: I'd have the next film pick up where part 3 ended. There's an 18 year gap between the ending of part 3 and part 4 that needs to be filled in.


there's an empty grave that needs to be filled in too.

JAKE LLOYD! he's old enough and since the entire franchise sucks now, he's be perfect....as Jabba Jr..

whatever, whomever, it's going to suck A$$
 
2012-11-04 08:05:15 PM  

Jizz Master Zero: Okay, I want everyone to line up. Anyone who believes this story will step forward. Someone will be around shortly to kick you in the nuts as hard as humanly possible as punishment for being so goddamned stupid.

Red Flag 1: story is from a gossip site that is the modern equivalent of the National Inquirer.
Red Flag 2: story is unsourced. The best you get is "oddsmakers." Which ones? Vegas? Reno? Larry in mail room?
Red Flag 3: The deal won't be finalized until the end of the year. They only have an outline. They've already said that they don't have a screenwriter or director yet. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is in place to even begin casting yet.

The article is based on pure speculation an deserves, at best, to be ignored.


SO
MUCH
THIS
 
2012-11-04 08:13:34 PM  
Honestly I'm shocked that our dumb, Lowest Common Denominator culture didn't just default back to Shia Lebouf. That no-talent ass-clown shows up in everything else. So many depressing possibilities out there.

I'm not against the idea of Episodes 7-9. Just don't make them about 30-60 year-old Luke & Leia. I don't want to see those characters re-cast and I don't want to see old Leia and Han Solo doing the hippity-dippity. It shouldn't be that hard to create new stories about Luke's kids or some other Skywalker descendent rising from humble circumstances, being mentored by an older, wiser wizard and overcoming long odds while having adventures with fun characters that they meet along the journey.

Just for god's sake please let's have no more flying R2-D2, no ham-fisted C3PO cameos, no lame dialogue, no stupid forced humor, no lame love stories with zero chemsitry, no more slow-walking shots, MUCH less green-screen sets and no more got-damn midichlorians. PLEASE!?
 
2012-11-04 09:07:05 PM  
If they cast Harrison and Carrie, i imagine some of the dialogue would be like this:

Han: "It was about that time that I noticed the smuggler was a two meter tall worm from the Nal Hutta sector.."

Leia: "Jabba the Hutt."

Han: "What you want Jabba the Hutt? And he said, '%20' and i said, 'i ain't givin you no %20!, and he said 'how bout %15?' and i said 'what, is there a sale on Jabba the Hutts or somethin'?"

Leia: "That made him real angry."

Han: "You damn right it made me angry."

Leia: "Not you, Jabba. He was about to put a bounty on your ass."
 
2012-11-04 09:26:31 PM  
I hope they cast the whole thing with midgets, like Terror of Tiny Town. If they are gonna blow this pig up make sure it's an epic explosion.
 
2012-11-04 09:29:30 PM  
seems applicable . . .


\\I dunno
\can't be a whole lot worse than 1 2 3 and the various redos.
 
2012-11-04 09:35:56 PM  
Well Disney can't fark it up more than Lucas did. Star Wars might start being good again without Lucas ruining it.
 
2012-11-04 09:42:08 PM  

Harry_Seldon: Casting Leia is simple...as long as she's rendered mute.

[i296.photobucket.com image 216x438]


FTFY
 
2012-11-04 09:45:50 PM  

Apos: Harry_Seldon: Casting Leia is simple...as long as she's rendered mute.

[i296.photobucket.com image 216x438]

FTFY


She is pretty good in "The Newsroom."
 
2012-11-04 09:53:45 PM  
LOL that was the sound of a bunch of Gen-X childhoods dying
 
2012-11-04 10:00:53 PM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Corey Feldman as Skywalker, the Hoff as Solo and Kirstie Alley asLeia Jabba the Hut.

You're welcome.


get it right you
 
2012-11-04 10:06:04 PM  

Harry_Seldon: Apos: Harry_Seldon: Casting Leia is simple...as long as she's rendered mute.

[i296.photobucket.com image 216x438]

FTFY

She is pretty good in "The Newsroom."



Is that right? Huh. I guess Sorkin's writing truly is that good.
 
2012-11-04 10:15:50 PM  

Popcorn Johnny: I'd have the next film pick up where part 3 ended. There's an 18 year gap between the ending of part 3 and part 4 that needs to be filled in.


I'd like to see the Heir to the Empire trilogy brought to the screen, personally. Imagine Tim Curry as Grand Admiral Thrawn.

Bring in Nathan Fillion to be Han.
 
2012-11-04 11:21:04 PM  
Who gives a shot? Everyone seems to think the next Star Wars will be as awesome as a Christopher Nolan Batman movie. But there's a really good chance it will be Fantastic Four meets The Green Lantern on Transformers Toy Island.

Face facts. 90% of everything sucks. Even Star Wars was just two pretty good movies made more than thirty years ago, followed by about ten billion dollars of absolute crap. Disney doesn't have a magic wand that's going to make it good again.
 
2012-11-04 11:54:59 PM  

The Larch: Who gives a shot? Everyone seems to think the next Star Wars will be as awesome as a Christopher Nolan Batman movie. But there's a really good chance it will be Fantastic Four meets The Green Lantern on Transformers Toy Island.

Face facts. 90% of everything sucks. Even Star Wars was just two pretty good movies made more than thirty years ago, followed by about ten billion dollars of absolute crap. Disney doesn't have a magic wand that's going to make it good again.


obviously you do...
 
2012-11-05 02:56:59 AM  

ThatDarkFellow: Dancis_Frake: Uh.

If you consider the original trilogy, only Guinness had a three-stars career before that (and he hated Star Wars, which he considered dumb) and only Ford had a three-stars career after that.
And half of Ford's acting consists in looking as if he's lost his car keys and is looking around for them, the other half consisting in bearing a shiat eating grin.

His most noticed performances post-SW were Shiat eating grin-bearing Dr Jones and Regarding Henry in which his character takes a bullet to the head and spends one hour and a half looking for his keys. (am I trying too hard?)

People should worry about having a good story, instead. The rest will follow.
/BTW, Efron's CV is not half bad for an actor his age.

- dye Al Pacino in green and have him play Yoda "Why d'you kiss your sister, Luke? Cause she's got A GREAT ASS..." 
- NPH as Han Solo
- the Old Spice guy as Calrissian
- Stewart and Pattinson as Leila and Luke
- Rupert Sanders as Vader and wait for Pattinson's reaction as he takes the helmet off

Great point. Star Wars was such a large and loved movie before it was ever released that they could cast anyo...oh, wait? You mean that the movie became a hit after it was released so your logic of casting makes no sense in an established franchise that can (and should) have decent actors?


Either this is some confused, Nyquil-fuelled trolling or you took my ridiculous SNL-material casting seriously and your logic does boil down to saying rabbits have good eyesight because they don't wear glasses.

Star Wars was a basic story with ok actors but became a success because it was an uplifting, simple sci-fi movie which came out at a time where Red Dawn seemed like a documentary to most people. Great actors didn't save the prequels, good writers are more vital. You can't put even Robert de Niro in front of a tennis ball in a green room for 10 hours and expect academy material at the end.

And anyone really thinking the next Star Wars movie is coming out in 2015 is delusional. There were at best 3 years between the last movies and they had a story, a casting, etc. already at hand.
Nothing before 2016/17 is my guess: the hollywood dirt sheets are going to spread watercooler discussion for the next year or so and people are going to go up in arms because Luke Skywalker deserves better than a nobody who's done Scooby-doo voice-overs.

And in true fark "oh, wait"/"pro tip" fashion: when defending movies on artistic merits, avoid using terms which could be applied to Saw or Paranormal activity, such as "hit" and "franchise".
 
2012-11-05 05:00:14 AM  
After the absolute devastation of Mars Needs Moms and John Carter, you'd think Disney wouldn't want to get within 9 parsecs of another space adventure film.
 
2012-11-05 09:11:01 AM  

ThatBillmanGuy: Yeah, this will happen.. Just like how Leo Dicaprio became Anakin...

/though, might have been a better movie..


At least Dicaprio can act and do more than one rendition of whiney biatch.
 
Displayed 127 of 127 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.

In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report