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(NASCAR)   It's time for the Blue Deuce to get in gear and for the 48 to witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational IDOL. It's the TUMS Fast Relief 500 at the Paperclip in Martinsville, coverage begins at 1 PM ET on ESPN   (nascar.com) divider line 82
    More: Spiffy, Brad Keselowski, Martinsville, Tums Fast Relief 500, American Idol, paper clips, fastest laps, Denny Hamlin, Poconos  
•       •       •

205 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 28 Oct 2012 at 12:30 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-10-28 05:10:41 PM  
2 votes:
img.photobucket.com
2012-10-28 03:16:02 PM  
2 votes:

catastrophe averted: mikaloyd: Does anybody have a link where they speak proper redneck instead of French?

Pardon? Je ne comprends pas.


Je parle Français un peu, mais IT SUCKS BALLS FOR NASCAR!
2012-10-28 02:42:58 PM  
2 votes:

bluorangefyre: WWE should be cross-posted in FarkUs, Sports, Entertainment, and Politics for good measure.


I'm not a wrestling fan, but the politics cross-post would be entertaining for the WTF factor from the politics trolls.

Go Fast Turn Left, I am so glad you share your talent with us. Those are amazing.
2012-10-28 02:32:58 PM  
2 votes:

bluorangefyre: I was kinda hoping Johnson showing emotion would cause him to crash. Also, it would've caused him to lose control of his car.


We've secretly replaced Jimmie Johnson's operating system with Windows ME. Let's see if anyone notices....
2012-10-28 05:11:21 PM  
1 votes:
*sobs* I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY!!!!!!
2012-10-28 05:10:49 PM  
1 votes:
dammit Kyle! Why didn't you spin him??
2012-10-28 05:10:04 PM  
1 votes:
nascarcasm @nascarcasm

Current time intervals - Twitter has about a 10-second lead on the broadcast.
2012-10-28 05:06:17 PM  
1 votes:
That's what you get for giving the 48 room, Keselowski. Nobody behind the 48 was going to afford you that same courtesy in the last 20 laps.
2012-10-28 05:05:47 PM  
1 votes:
WOOOOOOOOO Yellow!
2012-10-28 05:05:40 PM  
1 votes:

Dumb-Ass-Monkey: vegaswench: Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Even the dullest race (like today) will get interesting with 20 to go.

Fair enough.

I can't believe MRN went to commercial with 14 to go.

the script says that they will go into overtime, so MRN knows they can take the break.


see?
2012-10-28 05:05:34 PM  
1 votes:
Dammit.
2012-10-28 05:05:01 PM  
1 votes:

vegaswench: Dumb-Ass-Monkey: Even the dullest race (like today) will get interesting with 20 to go.

Fair enough.

I can't believe MRN went to commercial with 14 to go.


the script says that they will go into overtime, so MRN knows they can take the break.
2012-10-28 05:04:41 PM  
1 votes:
Wall him Kyle
2012-10-28 05:04:28 PM  
1 votes:
Well crap.
2012-10-28 05:03:08 PM  
1 votes:

vegaswench: Dumb-Ass-Monkey: This is gonna be an interesting finish

Yeah, for all the complaining about the race being boring earlier, things will pick up here.


It's Martinsville. Even the dullest race (like today) will get interesting with 20 to go.
2012-10-28 05:02:43 PM  
1 votes:
Dammit, Jooonyerrr
2012-10-28 05:02:30 PM  
1 votes:

Dumb-Ass-Monkey: This is gonna be an interesting finish


Yeah, for all the complaining about the race being boring earlier, things will pick up here.
2012-10-28 05:02:26 PM  
1 votes:

kteela: bluorangefyre: D-A-M, TKat,

All she's got isn't good enough. What else do you have?

Someone wrecking JJ on the restart? That'd work.

Also, happy birthday!


DO IT DO IT DO IT!!!!!
2012-10-28 05:00:33 PM  
1 votes:

vegaswench: mikaloyd: French feed went full retard and is over 100 laps behind

try link one at the vip site. Not linking it for fear of someone catching on and pulling it.


WOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


I heart you soooo much!
2012-10-28 05:00:30 PM  
1 votes:
This is gonna be an interesting finish
2012-10-28 05:00:04 PM  
1 votes:
WTF. The second vipboxsports dot eu stream is actually ahead of my TV.
2012-10-28 04:59:51 PM  
1 votes:

turbokat: bluorangefyre: D-A-M, TKat,

All she's got isn't good enough. What else do you have?

How 'bout a braindead ray! JOHNSON GOES IN!


PleasespeedonpitrowJJPleasespeedonpitrowJJPleasespeedonpitrowJJ
2012-10-28 04:59:10 PM  
1 votes:

bluorangefyre: D-A-M, TKat,

All she's got isn't good enough. What else do you have?


How 'bout a braindead ray! JOHNSON GOES IN!
2012-10-28 04:58:15 PM  
1 votes:
If only that was Johnson just now
img.photobucket.com
2012-10-28 04:57:50 PM  
1 votes:
And thar Harvick blows.
2012-10-28 04:57:18 PM  
1 votes:
Stupid spaces. Whatever. You know what to do, Mika.
2012-10-28 04:56:42 PM  
1 votes:
D-A-M, TKat,

All she's got isn't good enough. What else do you have?
2012-10-28 04:56:31 PM  
1 votes:

mikaloyd: French feed went full retard and is over 100 laps behind


http://www.vipboxsports.eu/motorsports/90635/1/nascar---tums-fast-rel i ef-500--live-stream-online.html
2012-10-28 04:56:07 PM  
1 votes:

Mztlplx: mikaloyd: French feed went full retard and is over 100 laps behind

Redneck is hard to translate to French.


Mon dieu y'all!
2012-10-28 04:55:31 PM  
1 votes:

mikaloyd: French feed went full retard and is over 100 laps behind


try link one at the vip site. Not linking it for fear of someone catching on and pulling it.
2012-10-28 04:55:21 PM  
1 votes:

turbokat: I would've been here sooner, but I had to lock down a serious oil leak in my Saab. It turned out to be a rusted out oil cooler line.

The trip back from work (75 miles) was a bit of a nail biter.


Never trust a car made in eugenics land. Its the oldest automotive wives tail.
2012-10-28 04:54:31 PM  
1 votes:
So Speed is going to finally get around to showing the Gold Coast V8 Supercar race tonight. Last year they sent DW and showed it live. This year... not so much.

From what I hear, there are some good end battles, and a few ridiculous clusterfarks at the start worth watching.
2012-10-28 04:53:06 PM  
1 votes:
French feed went full retard and is over 100 laps behind
2012-10-28 04:52:10 PM  
1 votes:
I would've been here sooner, but I had to lock down a serious oil leak in my Saab. It turned out to be a rusted out oil cooler line.

The trip back from work (75 miles) was a bit of a nail biter.
2012-10-28 04:48:27 PM  
1 votes:

bluorangefyre: turbokat: I leave you guys with a new Idol AND THIS HAPPENS!

*blows off dust, cleans contacts, fires*

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 800x456]


IF YOU ONLY KNEW THE POWAAAAAHHHHHH OF THE DARK SIDE!
2012-10-28 04:47:36 PM  
1 votes:

bluorangefyre: I hope to God that something is broken on JJ's car.


I thought I noticed some flame coming out behind and over the right rear tire before commercial. Probably just a chunk of rubber that hit a line or something.
2012-10-28 04:44:36 PM  
1 votes:
I hope to God that something is broken on JJ's car.
2012-10-28 04:43:28 PM  
1 votes:

relaxitsjustme: vegaswench: C'mon, JPM, you are our only hope. Pretend JJ's a track dryer.

Are you a wizard?


Judging by my football picks this year, no, but I'm almost there. ;)
2012-10-28 04:43:18 PM  
1 votes:

turbokat: I leave you guys with a new Idol AND THIS HAPPENS!

*blows off dust, cleans contacts, fires*


3.bp.blogspot.com
2012-10-28 04:43:11 PM  
1 votes:
OK, JJ spun Juablo? Yeah, Juablo won't let that go. He will make JJ humble before this is over.
2012-10-28 04:42:47 PM  
1 votes:

turbokat: I leave you guys with a new Idol AND THIS HAPPENS!

*blows off dust, cleans contacts, fires*


MAD APPLAUSE
2012-10-28 04:42:41 PM  
1 votes:
Thank you, JPM. And turbokat. Your idol is undeniable.
2012-10-28 04:42:12 PM  
1 votes:
Dammit 42, closer to JJ next time!!!
2012-10-28 04:41:45 PM  
1 votes:
C'mon, JPM, you are our only hope. Pretend JJ's a track dryer.
2012-10-28 04:40:27 PM  
1 votes:

turbokat: I leave you guys with a new Idol AND THIS HAPPENS!

*blows off dust, cleans contacts, fires*


Admit it, you were off cavorting with your new Indycar teammate, weren't you TK?
2012-10-28 04:39:34 PM  
1 votes:

turbokat: I leave you guys with a new Idol AND THIS HAPPENS!

*blows off dust, cleans contacts, fires*


Whew, just in time, too.
2012-10-28 04:38:15 PM  
1 votes:
I leave you guys with a new Idol AND THIS HAPPENS!

*blows off dust, cleans contacts, fires*
2012-10-28 03:56:01 PM  
1 votes:

kteela: vegaswench: bluorangefyre: vegaswench: Mztlplx: We're now channeling the race from 1990.

Sweet! Mullets, high hair, and denim are back, baybee!

It also means Vanilla Ice is popular again, and MC Hammer isn't broke yet.

Ha!

I wonder if it's too late to put some money on the Reds in the World Series? Pete Rose ain't got nuttin' on my inside info.

I'd love to remember my twenties...


True...this generation only has to scroll their FB timeline
2012-10-28 03:53:41 PM  
1 votes:

kteela: vegaswench: bluorangefyre: vegaswench: Mztlplx: We're now channeling the race from 1990.

Sweet! Mullets, high hair, and denim are back, baybee!

It also means Vanilla Ice is popular again, and MC Hammer isn't broke yet.

Ha!

I wonder if it's too late to put some money on the Reds in the World Series? Pete Rose ain't got nuttin' on my inside info.

I'd love to remember my twenties...


I'll stay in the here and now....Didn't have a kid then, but I was married to the 1st wife in '90.

/shudder
2012-10-28 03:44:17 PM  
1 votes:

bluorangefyre: vegaswench: Mztlplx: We're now channeling the race from 1990.

Sweet! Mullets, high hair, and denim are back, baybee!

It also means Vanilla Ice is popular again, and MC Hammer isn't broke yet.


Ha!

I wonder if it's too late to put some money on the Reds in the World Series? Pete Rose ain't got nuttin' on my inside info.
2012-10-28 03:44:00 PM  
1 votes:
JOhnson's car wants to go into the wall. D-A-M, wanna help his car achieve that goal?
2012-10-28 03:23:22 PM  
1 votes:
DAMNIT KURT, YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DO THAT WHEN JOHNSON WAS RIGHT BESIDE YOU!
img.photobucket.com
2012-10-28 03:21:36 PM  
1 votes:

vegaswench: Mztlplx: Le français est pour le hockey. Redneck est pour NASCAR.

How would one say "Fark Bettman" en français?


Baise Bettman.

/sac de bave. Je veux que ma saison de hockey, bon sang!
2012-10-28 03:18:51 PM  
1 votes:
ClavellBCMI Bah! I was drinking PBR back before any of those hipsters had even been born! 

Ha!, a friend has a list of companies that are So Southern They Don't Need to Sponsor Any Driver in NASCAR (since the fanbase already uses their products every day)

Wal-Mart(arguments about Publix, Winn-Dixie, Harris-Teeter unless a driver's doing a cross-promo where their logo is on the bumper...), Waffle House(Huddle House don't count), Shoney's, ChickFilA(Victory Junction's a foundation), Krispy Kreme
2012-10-28 03:17:47 PM  
1 votes:
Le français est pour le hockey. Redneck est pour NASCAR.
2012-10-28 03:17:07 PM  
1 votes:

mikaloyd: vegaswench: mikaloyd: Does anybody have a link where they speak proper redneck instead of French?

Link

thanks. Radio is better than nuffink


No problem. I like listening to it while watching football. If something important happens, I switch to the race. Plus the radio guys are much better than the TV guys.
2012-10-28 03:05:11 PM  
1 votes:

Go Fast Turn Left: Go Fast Turn Left: Go Fast Turn Left: With any luck, the end of today's race will look a lot like the end of yesterday's race:

Also, this:

Holy hell I'm tired. My bad.
[kenchilds.com image 640x427]


Got any shots of Piquet Jr. and... well.. he hit about half the front runners in the last 20 laps.
2012-10-28 02:35:19 PM  
1 votes:
Joonyur is back in his car, JJ is getting banged up, the Giants are going to win the World Series tonight, and I have my cat snuggled up with me.

It's a good day
2012-10-28 02:32:32 PM  
1 votes:
nascarcasm @nascarcasm

A right front tire at Martinsville much like eating a hot dog at Martinsville - after about 40 laps, there's usually an unexpected explosion
2012-10-28 02:20:43 PM  
1 votes:

DanZero: Bee-ben with the STINGER to the Zebra -- brought him down


DanZero, offsides, 5 yd penalty, football thread
2012-10-28 02:15:57 PM  
1 votes:

catastrophe averted: And Gordon passes Johnson during the commercial break!


Are you a wizard?
2012-10-28 02:14:48 PM  
1 votes:
New leader? YES!!
It's Jeff Gordon? bah
2012-10-28 02:14:41 PM  
1 votes:
My dad might try climbing out of his grave to get me, but GO JEFF GORDON!!!!
2012-10-28 02:09:36 PM  
1 votes:
So I was gonna deploy the #pacedog, but my computer is slower than moles' asses right now, so no go this time. Next time, Gadget... next time!
2012-10-28 02:08:55 PM  
1 votes:

DanZero: (that and Jennsarai's Lotus hamster joke helped too)


Did you hear? Simona de Silvestro has bailed from HVM racing. No Frankencars named "Porkchop." No more hamster-wheel powered Lotus cars. She may actually be able to start her Indycar career next season. And she's going to be TK's teammate.

i.imgur.com


Without text, for your Photoshopping pleasure.
2012-10-28 02:01:19 PM  
1 votes:
MRN has already given up hope on this race being anything but a borefest.
2012-10-28 01:59:41 PM  
1 votes:
nascarcasm @nascarcasm

David Ragan's spotter: "The #29 is on outside...still there...still there...YES, I FOUND WALDO!...still there...still there..."
2012-10-28 01:49:34 PM  
1 votes:
Why has the 48 not wrecked yet?
2012-10-28 01:44:56 PM  
1 votes:
Well I see D-A-M is here, so I'll turn it over to the Emperor from the galaxy far, far away:

www.jeditemplearchives.com
FIRE AT WILL COMMANDER!!!
2012-10-28 01:42:46 PM  
1 votes:
WTF? Why is Keselowski starting so far back? Ken Schrader is ahead of him!

/and the asshat is on pole?
www.wrestleenigma.com
2012-10-28 01:42:12 PM  
1 votes:
i205.photobucket.com

JOONYUR CRUSH JJ!!
2012-10-28 01:40:38 PM  
1 votes:
i205.photobucket.com

Jimmie Johnson! Juan Pablo Montoya will suplex you, put you in the Camel Clutch, break your back, f*ck your ass, and make you humble!
2012-10-28 01:39:04 PM  
1 votes:
nascarcasm @nascarcasm

At Martinsville only, moving in front of a fast-approaching car to hopefully get the win is known as clock-blocking.
2012-10-28 01:37:00 PM  
1 votes:
Kid Rock AGAIN?

This is getting as bad as Cee Lo on NFLN
2012-10-28 01:35:14 PM  
1 votes:

bluorangefyre: and its my birthday today


Happy birthday!
2012-10-28 01:34:35 PM  
1 votes:

Warchild: LOL SEYMOUR JOHNSON


That sounds wrong....
2012-10-28 01:26:41 PM  
1 votes:
Are they just rambling about forking everyone on TV right now?
2012-10-28 01:26:06 PM  
1 votes:
Guess who's here? And for the idol...

(microphone shut off)
(grabs bullhorn)
I BROUGHT BACKUP!!!!

www.theforce.net
fandommenacepodcast.files.wordpress.com
www.startrek.com 

/and its my birthday today
//all I want is a smoldering #48 car
2012-10-28 01:13:10 PM  
1 votes:

crotchgrabber: I want to cockpunch kid rock. It's too early on my one day off to look at that piece of shiat.

I'm grumpy today.
Go Ambrose! (Why not, right?)


You and me both crotchgrabber, you and me both, Kid Rock needs to DIAF.
2012-10-28 01:10:54 PM  
1 votes:
I want to cockpunch kid rock. It's too early on my one day off to look at that piece of shiat.

I'm grumpy today.
Go Ambrose! (Why not, right?)
2012-10-28 01:02:53 PM  
1 votes:

ClavellBCMI: And this week, I got my thread submission in early enough to beat the TV time! At this rate, I might as well be the semi-official NASCAR race-thread subby for the rest of the year (unless someone else beats me to it, in which case they are more than welcome to submit a race thread, since I am usually not thinking about it until noon ET, but today was an odd day, for some stupid reason I woke up before 8 AM on a Sunday). Oh, and GO BRAD! GO SMOKE! GO DENNY! GO IDOL! And green flag is 1:43 PM ET or so, so T-minus 60 minutes and counting.


I would do more (I got one about a month ago because nobody else thought to submit one), but I'm not up on the news outside of the races. IndyCar, however, is something that's easier for me to follow, and that's how I became the semi-official subby this year. (that and Jennsarai's Lotus hamster joke helped too)
2012-10-28 12:44:55 PM  
1 votes:

rhiannon: DanZero: Actual green flag time? I have to do the football-race thread switch this week and hope not to screw the posts up.

1:43 pm ET


Thaaank you!
 
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