If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Live Science)   Expert says that baby-naming regret is on the rise among parents, and that it damn well should be with all the little Braden Jaden Aidens and Kayeghleighs and Dacrons and Sinutabs out there   (livescience.com) divider line 127
    More: Repeat, Kayeghleighs, baby names, Laura Wattenberg, Swarthmore College, U.S. Social Security Administration  
•       •       •

9675 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Oct 2012 at 11:35 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-10-20 10:38:45 AM  
11 votes:

dickfreckle: I never got along with my father, but he kept me from being named "Huey," because it was the first object mom saw from the window when I was born on a USAF base overseas.

I was 8 or 9 when Huey Lewis and the News were a big deal. That would have been untold 'nad punches. No kid in my generation was named Huey. At least none at my schools.

Thanks Dad, for talking sense to her.


This story is more interesting when you assume that your dad convinced her to name you dickfreckle instead
2012-10-20 09:18:19 AM  
11 votes:
Nursing homes are going to be weird in a few decades.

"Can someone please change Dykkotah Jayde's sheets?"
"Wow, D'Yl*an's pants are nipple high today."
"You don't want to play Bingo with KatnissaBella - she cheats worse than Chl@mydeea"
2012-10-20 12:17:07 PM  
8 votes:

rickythepenguin: Teknowaffle: It doesn't make you any more Irish, doesn't make your kid any more Irish, and will likely get their asses kicked.


she was conceived in Ireland. is that good enough for you?


That's why my kid's name is Honda Civic.
2012-10-20 12:29:39 PM  
7 votes:

mcwehrle: My in laws were the Smiths



Morrissey is a dick, isn't he?
2012-10-20 11:41:33 AM  
6 votes:
images.politico.com

Agrees.
2012-10-20 10:30:52 AM  
5 votes:
I thought we had given my son a perfectly respectable, traditional name. And then my dad started singing "Old Mark Donald had a farm . . ." shiat.
2012-10-20 09:39:20 AM  
5 votes:

dickfreckle: I was 8 or 9 when Huey Lewis and the News were a big deal.


www.filmoria.co.uk
2012-10-20 04:19:56 PM  
4 votes:

mcwehrle: 99.998er: EZ Writer:
T (that's not a typo).

What do you even DO with a name like that?


Pitty foos.
2012-10-20 12:15:46 PM  
4 votes:

Shotgun Justice: My son was just born on Tues. Picked out his name (Atlas) months ago. Now it seems like every other movie coming out this month has Atlas in the title.


/shrug
2012-10-20 12:02:11 PM  
4 votes:

Ennuipoet: This is why I have named all of my non-existent children after that Master Baby Namer, George Foreman, even the girls grills.

2012-10-20 11:53:48 AM  
4 votes:

cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline


ohnblog.com
2012-10-20 11:49:56 AM  
4 votes:
Jackie and Johnny and Tommy and Bill. Danny, Larry, Johnny, and Phil. What happened? Todd. And Cody, and Dillon, and Cameron, and Tucker. Hi Tucker, i'm Todd. Hi Todd, i'm Tucker. fark Tucker, Tucker sucks. And fark Tuckers friend Kyle. Thats another soft name for a boy. Kyle. Soft names make soft people. I'll bet you ten times out of ten, Nicky, Vinnie, and Tony would beat the shiat out of Todd, Kyle, and Tucker
2012-10-20 11:42:22 AM  
4 votes:
O'bligahtorie:
imgs.xkcd.com
2012-10-20 11:41:11 AM  
4 votes:
Brayden, Jayden, Kayden bullcrap.
When my daughter was born, I sent out an email to the family saying that we had named her Placenta Febreze.

/Joke, of course.
2012-10-20 09:27:31 AM  
4 votes:
I'm naming my baby Mitochondria.
2012-10-20 09:08:42 AM  
4 votes:

Mugato: cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline

What's racist about it?

/not subby


Lack of apostrophes
2012-10-20 08:56:39 AM  
4 votes:
The wife and I always joked about naming the kids after pairs of city names as seen on interstate road signs:

Custer Feldspar
Thurber Mingus.

We used to think we were being weird; now I'd say reasonable.
2012-10-20 08:27:44 AM  
4 votes:
Sinutab?

Hahahahaha...

Nice.

I was always partial to Nosmo King... You know... After a No Smoking sign in the waiting room.
2012-10-20 02:14:51 PM  
3 votes:
Today's parents have so many choices for their baby girl. If the baby is white, here are all of them, as far as I can tell:

Katelyn
Katelynn
Katelinn
Katelin
Caitlynn
Caitlin
Caitlyn
Caitlinn
Kaytlynne
Kaytlin
Caytelynn
Kaytelyn
Kaitelinne
Caitlynne
2012-10-20 01:40:40 PM  
3 votes:
Named my son Trenton (we're temporarily displaced New Jerseyans). The joke whenever we go back home is "at least he's not Camden."
2012-10-20 12:57:12 PM  
3 votes:

ScottRiqui: So, has anyone ever known someone named "Judas"?


www.prowritewcu.com
2012-10-20 12:35:20 PM  
3 votes:

WhippingBoy: The thing I hate the worst is people with a "Celtic" background giving their children some sort of hard-core, uncommon (in North America) "Celtic" name (Bronwyn, Ciaran, etc.).
The closest experience most of these people have with the "old country" is buying a Shamrock shake from McDonalds.


Props to that, they should stick to traditional north american names like dancing eagle and smoking bear.
2012-10-20 12:35:15 PM  
3 votes:

dickfreckle: I'm naming my baby Mitochondria.


And her sister, Eve.
2012-10-20 12:31:36 PM  
3 votes:
The thing I hate the worst is people with a "Celtic" background giving their children some sort of hard-core, uncommon (in North America) "Celtic" name (Bronwyn, Ciaran, etc.).
The closest experience most of these people have with the "old country" is buying a Shamrock shake from McDonalds.
2012-10-20 12:30:28 PM  
3 votes:

buckler: Once, at an amusement park, I ran into an attractive and successful employee whose name badge read "Latrina". I couldn't decide between pity and amusement.


I'd go with ammusement, you being in a park for that and all.
2012-10-20 12:27:50 PM  
3 votes:
25.media.tumblr.com
2012-10-20 12:23:27 PM  
3 votes:

FizixJunkee: At my daughter's school, there is a Micaela and a Michaela, the only acceptable variations of the name, if you ask me. McKayla is just W.R.O.N.G. wrong!


www.straitpinkie.com
2012-10-20 12:15:27 PM  
3 votes:

wotthefark:
I have to bite my tongue when the Asian "asian" parents show up. Plus the kids name is Xiao or some shiat but they chose an "Engrish" name and went with "Riry".


media.nscdn.com
2012-10-20 12:14:25 PM  
3 votes:

riverwalk barfly: My father-in-law is a physician at a medical school. The training hospital is the county hospital so he sees a lot of indigent patients. He has told stories of seeing patients that were named after the medications given to the mother pre/postpartum. Strange.


A friend of mine is a hospital nurse and told me a woman who had just given birth had decided to name her newborn daughter Meconium, because she'd heard the nurses use the word and thought it sounded pretty. She reluctantly changed her mind when they explained to her the word meconium is the medical term for an infant's first bowel movement.
2012-10-20 12:11:17 PM  
3 votes:

dbax1985: CSB time: We searched and searched for a name for a girl last year when my wife was pregnant, and eventually settled on the strategy of each of us making a list. Then, we would narrow the list down by those names that matched. None of them did. As my wife went through my list, every single name got vetoed as a first name, but "Jo" hung on as a middle name (It's my mom's middle name). My wife was hell-bent on picking the name "Raelyn", taking it from her dad's middle name of "Rae". She announced that she liked the name "Raelyn Jo", to which my response was, "Oh, that name sounds like it comes from a trailer park!" My wife looked very hurt at that exclamation, so I let it be. Raelyn Jo is sitting next to me in her swing right now while mom is at work.
My dad and sisters have called her Rae-J since birth. My wife hates that.


Can we call her Rae? Or can we call her J?
2012-10-20 08:33:05 AM  
3 votes:
There are 2 Nevaeh's, and 3 different spellings of Olivia in my daughter's(2nd grade) class of 22 students.
 
/7 kids have either an apostrophe or hyphen in their name (including O'Lyvia)
2012-10-20 06:02:34 PM  
2 votes:

SundaesChild: /parent of a Maia




i.imgur.com
2012-10-20 03:20:22 PM  
2 votes:

BumpInTheNight: That's nothing, just wait until the 4chan era geeks get to the breeding


fortunately, unless hands learn to reproduce, I'd say we've got time before that happens.
2012-10-20 03:20:04 PM  
2 votes:

mcwehrle: Boyd is still a great name.


3.bp.blogspot.com
2012-10-20 02:54:57 PM  
2 votes:
I met a guy not long ago named John Thomas. When I said to him, "So, I'm guessing your parents aren't from England?" he just stared blankly at me.

I hope for his sake he never travels across the pond.
2012-10-20 01:54:08 PM  
2 votes:

Ivo Shandor: Ed_Severson: Named my boy Edison ... He comes from a long line of engineers

A pity you didn't name him after one, then. Instead you went for a self-promoting businessman best known for re-marketing Joseph Swan's lightbulb, electrocuting elephants, and inventing movie piracy.


Three of my favorite things!

/But seriously, fark off.
2012-10-20 01:53:22 PM  
2 votes:
GeneMasseth?
2012-10-20 01:36:11 PM  
2 votes:
I had a friend in high school who used to babysit a girl named Crystal Lear. Her middle name? Shanda.

I'm not even joking.
2012-10-20 01:00:14 PM  
2 votes:
what about the name Koyaanisqatsi
2012-10-20 12:35:51 PM  
2 votes:

namegoeshere: rickythepenguin: Teknowaffle: It doesn't make you any more Irish, doesn't make your kid any more Irish, and will likely get their asses kicked.


she was conceived in Ireland. is that good enough for you?

That's why my kid's name is Honda Civic.


Conceived in Japan, born in Ohio, and heavier than his European equivalent?
2012-10-20 12:32:22 PM  
2 votes:

rickythepenguin: mcwehrle: My in laws were the Smiths


Morrissey is a dick, isn't he?


Every wedding he panics and wants to hang the DJ.
2012-10-20 12:25:02 PM  
2 votes:

Ed_Severson: AverageAmericanGuy: Nicola is way too obvious.

Family ties to Edison.


Sorry about your misfortune. Hope you have been able to rise above it.
2012-10-20 12:19:03 PM  
2 votes:

namegoeshere: That's why my kid's name is Honda Civic.



my youngest is named "Burger King Bathroom"
2012-10-20 12:13:07 PM  
2 votes:
ionetheurbandaily.files.wordpress.com

dbax1985: My dad and sisters have called her Rae-J since birth. My wife hates that.


wow...your daughter is very......nice looking?
2012-10-20 12:11:56 PM  
2 votes:

Shotgun Justice: My son was just born on Tues. Picked out his name (Atlas) months ago. Now it seems like every other movie coming out this month has Atlas in the title.


Randian names always a good choice? Galt or Gulch always a good one. No one will ever make fun of him, ever. Ayn had a very normal name and a very normal philosophy. No one ever made fun of it, ever.
2012-10-20 12:11:41 PM  
2 votes:
can't wait to see how many girls are named Ermengarde in the future

/ermahgerd!
2012-10-20 12:07:48 PM  
2 votes:

drewogatory: At my old job we would automatically shiatcan any application with a stupid, stupid name on the grounds that the apple never falls far from the tree. Probably made us racist, but we were just too damn lazy to go thru the paperwork hassle of firing dumbasses.


And now those parents are crying because they cost their children a job in the fast-paced high-prestige world of pizza delivery.
2012-10-20 12:06:35 PM  
2 votes:
My mom works in a hospital in an "urban" area and when black people go to register their newborns, they often admit that they can't spell the name they just gave their newborn kid. So yeah, black people often name their kids goofy shiat. It's not racism to simply notice that. Black people make jokes about it too.
2012-10-20 12:05:00 PM  
2 votes:
I've been a college prof for eighteen years and there's always some fun the first day of every semester when I go over the rosters. Two best that I can remember:

1. Guy whose first name was "Genghis Khan".
2. Guy whose last name was Dickreiter.
2012-10-20 12:02:53 PM  
2 votes:

Shyla: I realized I spelled it wrong when I saw your version. You're right, it's actually Saoirse. Kill me now. And shame on you.



JUST FOR THAT I HOPE SHE NAMES YOUR GRANDBABY QUADRUPLE REVERSE SAOIRSE
d23 [TotalFark]
2012-10-20 11:52:25 AM  
2 votes:
rockhall.com

BILL OR GEORGE.. anything but SUE!
2012-10-20 11:48:17 AM  
2 votes:

mab1823: Agrees.



that would be Trip, Tagg, Mitt, Ttti_nNn, Glerp, and Cthuhlu?
2012-10-20 11:45:00 AM  
2 votes:
I'm almost certain some of those are Pokemon names...
2012-10-20 11:42:57 AM  
2 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: You hardly ever see any Gertrudes anymore.

Bring back Gertrude!


Your wish is my command.

www.jppatches.com


/Hi Patches Pals!
2012-10-20 08:46:07 AM  
2 votes:
This is why I have named all of my non-existent children after that Master Baby Namer, George Foreman, even the girls.
2012-10-20 08:43:17 AM  
2 votes:

cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline


I intend on naming my kids Oxycontin and Percocet.
2012-10-20 08:31:31 AM  
2 votes:
Well that's an incredibly racist headline
2012-10-20 11:30:36 PM  
1 votes:

rickythepenguin: namegoeshere: That's why my kid's name is Honda Civic.


my youngest is named "Burger King Bathroom"


She did more than hold your pickle.
2012-10-20 08:57:33 PM  
1 votes:

digitalrain: AverageAmericanGuy: Shyla: Currently trying to talk my daughter out of naming her daughter Saorise. I have 2 months left and I'm afraid I'm not going to be successful.

How would that be pronounced? Sow-ree-say? Sow-rise? Sow-ree-zee?

Isn't it pronounced Sor-sha?


No, it's pronounced Kay-Luh
2012-10-20 08:26:48 PM  
1 votes:
My students once asked me what I would name my child, should I ever have one.

I looked at them with all seriousness and said
"If it is a girl I will name her Hepzebah Jemimah. And if it is a boy Jochaim Misobeseth." (not sure about the spelling, too lazy to look them up) Anyway they are old testament Bible names. The kids freaked.

Alas, we cannot have any children, so they were spared.
Skr
2012-10-20 06:52:41 PM  
1 votes:
I'll be naming my kid either Drizzt Do'Urden or Anna May, depending on the gender. NO REGERTS 


www.bestworstadvice.com
2012-10-20 06:48:50 PM  
1 votes:

TotesCrayCray: So, you're siding with one of American history's biggest assholes? Naming the kid Nicola would be a mini tribute to Tesla and an acknowledgement of the horrible person that Edison was. Trying to postmortem make it up to Tesla by keeping his name alive would be classy.


A couple points ...

1. I have nothing to "make up" to Tesla, so that's a pointless idea to consider.
2. Nobody cares about your nerdrage grudge boner for a guy you never met, least of all me.

Thanks for your concern, though. Now that we've given him a solid name, we just have to teach him not to be a loudmouthed douchenozzle. Since he'll probably never meet you, I think we're safe.
2012-10-20 05:06:58 PM  
1 votes:

TotesCrayCray: Ed_Severson: Named my boy Edison ... He comes from a long line of engineers and the name has a bit of a family relevance as well. It's unique and nobody should ever have trouble spelling it. Win.

Not win. Fail. Last names as first names are equally as pants-on-head stupid. Many many last names (surnames) were created to denote something specific. Edison means "son of Edward". Surnames were handy with older populations when it came who placing a face to a given name (first name). There would be, say, 3 Johns and you'd have to tell them apart. So you'd have something like "John, Son of Edward (John Edison)", "John, of the family of blacksmiths (John Smith)", And "John, from the hill (John Gorski).

So your kid's first name is "son of Edward". If you have a "son of" last name, then double congrats, your kid is a walking gay joke.


Who's failing?
2012-10-20 05:00:52 PM  
1 votes:

kiwimoogle84: Working at a health insurance company, I saw a few horrid ones.

Agent Orange Jones
Fantasia Pickle
Foxx Jenn Starr

Not to mention a whole family, including mom and dad, with names starting with Char---. Like Charmonte, Charmaine, Charmika, Charmonte jr, and Charmelia. *facepalm*


I'vepersonally seem sets of twins whose names are one LETTER off.
Like Christine, amd Christina.
Note to parents, if you want your insurance companies to hate you, do this.
2012-10-20 04:18:50 PM  
1 votes:

FirstNationalBastard: otto the bull: Pete Punchbeef
Pack Blowfist
Slab Bulkhead
Butch Deadlift
Slake Fistcrunch
Punt Speedchunk
Duke Rockhard Vaginblaster
Count Magnus von Beaverpounder
Dr. Flint Butthrust, American
Lord Beef Swellington
Prince Bolt Poonpounder
Lex von Vagmaster, Earl of Queef
Count Ludvig von Boxstuphin
Sir Meat Van Der Throb
Lady Grindetta von Thrust
Countesss Lubetrina von Takeitoffen
Duchess Standinline Pullatrain
Czarina Ivana Threevayovich
Countess Phistina O'swallow
Miss Sluttina Jaminfist
Punch Rockgroin
Crud Bonemeat
Buff Hardback
Splint Chesthair
Blast Hardcheese
Dirk Vanderhuge

Bob Johnson?


Art Vandelay.
2012-10-20 03:40:37 PM  
1 votes:

kc278: Not to break up the circlejerk, but I gave my daughter a "non-traditional" name.

It's a real word, has deep personal meaning for me, is beautful sounding, isn't especially difficult to spell or pronounce phonetically, and is readily shortened to a "normal" sounding (but still uncomon) name.

Eikasia (Εικασία: archaic Greek for "imagination"). Kasey for short.

My point is that stunt naming can be pulled off, but it requires a little more thought than many people seem to be able to muster.


Ike-Asia? Yikes
2012-10-20 03:14:47 PM  
1 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: Shyla: Currently trying to talk my daughter out of naming her daughter Saorise. I have 2 months left and I'm afraid I'm not going to be successful.

How would that be pronounced? Sow-ree-say? Sow-rise? Sow-ree-zee?


Psoriasis.
2012-10-20 02:53:38 PM  
1 votes:

Mitt Romneys Tax Return: lohphat: Jgok: AverageAmericanGuy: You hardly ever see any Gertrudes anymore.

Bring back Gertrude!

Actually, a friend of mine has a daughter named Gertrude.

German name, pronounced Gehr-tru-duh.

(snip)

I always assumed that was one name which was never coming back.


I know a number of Gertrudes -- mostly friends from Mexico or South America. The Spanish version, Gertrudis, is pronounced hehr-TROO-dees. And now I live in Minnesota, and I know three Gertrudes, but they're all over 75 years old. It's a lovely name, but very old-fashioned.
2012-10-20 02:50:18 PM  
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
"To pronounce it correctly, I would have to pull out your tongue."
2012-10-20 02:27:32 PM  
1 votes:

otto the bull: Pete Punchbeef
Pack Blowfist
Slab Bulkhead
Butch Deadlift
Slake Fistcrunch
Punt Speedchunk
Duke Rockhard Vaginblaster
Count Magnus von Beaverpounder
Dr. Flint Butthrust, American
Lord Beef Swellington
Prince Bolt Poonpounder
Lex von Vagmaster, Earl of Queef
Count Ludvig von Boxstuphin
Sir Meat Van Der Throb
Lady Grindetta von Thrust
Countesss Lubetrina von Takeitoffen
Duchess Standinline Pullatrain
Czarina Ivana Threevayovich
Countess Phistina O'swallow
Miss Sluttina Jaminfist
Punch Rockgroin
Crud Bonemeat
Buff Hardback
Splint Chesthair
Blast Hardcheese
Dirk Vanderhuge


Bob Johnson?


Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Kali-Ma: Named my son Trenton (we're temporarily displaced New Jerseyans). The joke whenever we go back home is "at least he's not Camden."

It's always prudent to name your child based on how much of a punchline it is.


By that logic, the name "Rectum" would be best of all.
2012-10-20 02:21:46 PM  
1 votes:

boredofedu: My go-to names when someone asks for suggestions is La-sha or La Shantae Shaniqua. My son and daiughter-in-law are having a baby next spring and want to name it Paisley if it's a girl.

/I weep for my grandchild...


Eh. Paisley isn't that bad. It could be plaid.
2012-10-20 02:15:55 PM  
1 votes:
Pete Punchbeef
Pack Blowfist
Slab Bulkhead
Butch Deadlift
Slake Fistcrunch
Punt Speedchunk
Duke Rockhard Vaginblaster
Count Magnus von Beaverpounder
Dr. Flint Butthrust, American
Lord Beef Swellington
Prince Bolt Poonpounder
Lex von Vagmaster, Earl of Queef
Count Ludvig von Boxstuphin
Sir Meat Van Der Throb
Lady Grindetta von Thrust
Countesss Lubetrina von Takeitoffen
Duchess Standinline Pullatrain
Czarina Ivana Threevayovich
Countess Phistina O'swallow
Miss Sluttina Jaminfist
Punch Rockgroin
Crud Bonemeat
Buff Hardback
Splint Chesthair
Blast Hardcheese
Dirk Vanderhuge
2012-10-20 02:04:33 PM  
1 votes:

sporkme: [i1156.photobucket.com image 500x375]

/Dave, Charlotte and Lily


Mulva?
2012-10-20 02:02:59 PM  
1 votes:

NewportBarGuy: cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline

I intend on naming my kids Oxycontin and Percocet.


My two baby girls are named Lexus and Mustang:

farm9.staticflickr.com
2012-10-20 01:41:39 PM  
1 votes:
Lord & Lady Douche Bag approve.
2012-10-20 01:40:47 PM  
1 votes:
Saw this Kay & Peele skit last night. Fits for this thread for sure.


Link 



/Very funny show actually.
2012-10-20 01:39:25 PM  
1 votes:

Ed_Severson: Named my boy Edison ... He comes from a long line of engineers


A pity you didn't name him after one, then. Instead you went for a self-promoting businessman best known for re-marketing Joseph Swan's lightbulb, electrocuting elephants, and inventing movie piracy.
2012-10-20 01:38:40 PM  
1 votes:

5monkeys: The only name regret i have is my 3rd daughter cailin gets called kaitlyn all the time. I live her name and it suits her, but i would have named her something else to save her the no t thing she has to explain over and over. I have seen her just ignore the fact that other kids are saying her name wrong and just play. She gives them one it's cailin not kaitlyn. The she just answers to whatever.

My kids all have Irish names. They have a really Irish last name so it fits. Taylor,Brianna,cailin,reilly, and liam


The names are nice, but apart from Liam, I'd dispute their being Irish, per se. "Brianna" is definitely Celtic in some sense, but I've never met one in Ireland (not conclusive, of course). "Cailín" means "girl" in Irish, so nobody's actually called that (ditto the anglicised version, "Colleen"). "Reilly" is an (anglicised) surname, not a first name. And "Taylor" has no Irish connection whatsoever that I can think of.

Ok, now I feel like an assh**e.
2012-10-20 01:37:39 PM  
1 votes:

CaptArmond: Some of my the more out there and stupid names I've seen lately:
Flavious
Kyan
Cyncire (pronounced sincere)
T (that's not a typo)
Tree
Tequila
Chevyell
Emilea (pronounced Emily according to her whack job mom)
Margarita (non Hispanic)
A'marie
Jax


All good examples of names you'll never see on a business card...
2012-10-20 01:30:24 PM  
1 votes:

Heamer: The school where I work has an Aiden, Brayden, and Caiden all in the same class. That class also has four Nicholases, so go figure.

I've also noticed a spate of kids named after occupations and other nouns: Baker, Parker, Archer, Cooper, Hunter, Spencer, Fletcher, etc.


Archer is a fantastic name, at least if you pr-pend it with Sterling.
2012-10-20 01:20:05 PM  
1 votes:

TastyEloi: LiberalEastCoastElitist:
//What's so wrong with a normal name with no ambiguous spelling or pronunciation?

Because some people aren't interested in having a human being as a child--they want to create a product they can market to the world.

A pretty sizable percentage of parents don't really care about the well-being of their children.


Nailed it.

"I named my son Atlantis Tiberion Quetzequatl, and my daughter Lucinia Rosedragon, because they just fit their little baby faces perfectly... Nevermind the fact that those are characters from my failed WoW novel."
2012-10-20 01:15:37 PM  
1 votes:
Some of my the more out there and stupid names I've seen lately:
Flavious
Kyan
Cyncire (pronounced sincere)
T (that's not a typo)
Tree
Tequila
Chevyell
Emilea (pronounced Emily according to her whack job mom)
Margarita (non Hispanic)
A'marie
Jax
2012-10-20 01:11:38 PM  
1 votes:
The only name regret i have is my 3rd daughter cailin gets called kaitlyn all the time. I live her name and it suits her, but i would have named her something else to save her the no t thing she has to explain over and over. I have seen her just ignore the fact that other kids are saying her name wrong and just play. She gives them one it's cailin not kaitlyn. The she just answers to whatever.

My kids all have Irish names. They have a really Irish last name so it fits. Taylor,Brianna,cailin,reilly, and liam
2012-10-20 01:10:08 PM  
1 votes:

mcwehrle: Back in grade school, the names were all very boring/solid/normal (pick which you like)...Jeff, Gary, Jessica, Susan, etc etc. For one year in 6th grade, there was a young man named Slade. We all thought it was the most awesome name, and he owned it. Wore black t-shirts with rock bands on them (think Sex Pistols, Ramones, the really great ones) and spiked leather wrist bands, etc. Lived in what was considered "the poor part" of town, which was hilarious because it was a tiny dirt farming town, we ALL were poor. They were just a lower level of poor. His dad worked as a mechanic at the gas station, no one ever really saw his mom. His older sister's name was Winter, but even though she seemed like high school age, she never came to school. (remember, I'm in 6th grade, I didn't really think about that kind of stuff)

He was very nice, really smart and a blast to be around. His parents, which I never met, seemed like they were pretty hands off though, he was out and about way past what our parents would let us run the streets. Then they left.

There's no point to this post, just all the different names brought that memory up.


As soon as you described Slade, I instantly knew he was cooler than I will ever be.

Great name!
2012-10-20 01:06:23 PM  
1 votes:
Yeah, just give your kids normal names, and let them pick their own Star Wars name when they get older.
2012-10-20 01:04:33 PM  
1 votes:
Back in grade school, the names were all very boring/solid/normal (pick which you like)...Jeff, Gary, Jessica, Susan, etc etc. For one year in 6th grade, there was a young man named Slade. We all thought it was the most awesome name, and he owned it. Wore black t-shirts with rock bands on them (think Sex Pistols, Ramones, the really great ones) and spiked leather wrist bands, etc. Lived in what was considered "the poor part" of town, which was hilarious because it was a tiny dirt farming town, we ALL were poor. They were just a lower level of poor. His dad worked as a mechanic at the gas station, no one ever really saw his mom. His older sister's name was Winter, but even though she seemed like high school age, she never came to school. (remember, I'm in 6th grade, I didn't really think about that kind of stuff)

He was very nice, really smart and a blast to be around. His parents, which I never met, seemed like they were pretty hands off though, he was out and about way past what our parents would let us run the streets. Then they left.

There's no point to this post, just all the different names brought that memory up.
2012-10-20 01:02:53 PM  
1 votes:
Current English obsessions where I live:

Harry
Charlie
Lilly
Ruby
Archie
Evie

Basically anything old school with a Y sound on the end.

I of course bucked the trend with Laurie and Jemima which I still think are awesome. But then I would, I am a dad.

I still want to change my name to Benedict Cumberbatch because frankly that is the most awesome name ever made.
2012-10-20 01:00:46 PM  
1 votes:
We decided to give our son a name that wouldn't date. All the kids at his school love the fact that he's called Han Tiberius Jones.
2012-10-20 12:59:06 PM  
1 votes:

beany:

I'm from Ireland, and I quite like the names Saoirse and Caoimhe, but I agree, it's insane giving them to a child outside Ireland. Write down your choices on a piece of paper; hand it to your friends and family; ask them to read the names back to you, without any verbal hints. If more then a third of them get it wrong, cross it off the list.


That is an excellent idea for a baby shower game! You might have just solved the problem - thank you!
2012-10-20 12:53:05 PM  
1 votes:

Mugato: cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline

What's racist about it?

/not subby


If someone is offended it automatically racist
i26.photobucket.com
2012-10-20 12:50:39 PM  
1 votes:
dick trikkle
2012-10-20 12:49:57 PM  
1 votes:
So, has anyone ever known someone named "Judas"?
2012-10-20 12:48:49 PM  
1 votes:
I know a guy named Rommel. I don't think he cares much for it. I think it's the coolest name ever.
2012-10-20 12:47:47 PM  
1 votes:

Queen Amy: I suppose by now everybody's heard that you pronounce La-a as "LaDasha - the dash don't be silent!"

Anybody come up with names for her siblings? So far we have . (pronounced Dot) and #atha (pronounced hash-tag-atha).


Marger@ (good luck with that one, employer's email admin!)
*
Iva :
2012-10-20 12:46:46 PM  
1 votes:
My ex girlfriend had a child support case where the baby's first and middle names were Ninety-Five South.

I'm waiting for the day when I meet a Lunesta, a Boniva, or a Valtrexia. Also I'm expecting to see, some day, a NFL reciever to be named Completrius
2012-10-20 12:43:35 PM  
1 votes:
My wife threatened to have an abortion over my insistence that our child be named "Megadude".
2012-10-20 12:38:40 PM  
1 votes:

Donau: In my family I am the fourth my father is the third, my son damn well will be the fifth.

John

Its a good name, doesn't wear out.


You can never have enough Johns in the house...
2012-10-20 12:33:54 PM  
1 votes:
True story:
My wife works in a hospital. One night an older black nurse was bragging about the beautiful, unusual name her daughter had picked for her newborn: Aubergine.
The wife: "Your granddaughter's name is eggplant?"

I love my wife.

Oh, and our twin daughters now share a preschool class with a "Rad" and, I kid you not, a "Fayelynne". Also, the usual Jaydens and Olivias.
2012-10-20 12:32:19 PM  
1 votes:

leevis: I was at either Mammoth Cave or Lost River Cave in Kentucky a few years ago and wanted to buy some souvenir mugs for my nephews. On the racks they had spots for three different spellings of Caitlin, but didn't have any for the one I needed: Charles.


Hopefully they had plenty of "Bort" ones...
2012-10-20 12:31:07 PM  
1 votes:

Shyla: Shyla: AverageAmericanGuy: Shyla: Currently trying to talk my daughter out of naming her daughter Saorise. I have 2 months left and I'm afraid I'm not going to be successful.

How would that be pronounced? Sow-ree-say? Sow-rise? Sow-ree-zee?

From what I understand the pronunciation is 'Seer-sha', it's Irish, wish neither my family or baby daddy's family are.

Ugh, her name is going to be butchered by every teacher and every job interview she ever has.

I've tried to explain this, but it didn't work. I got a hormonal daughter crying saying "you think I'm going to be a bad mother" so I had to back off. I'm just going to have to think of a nickname for her I guess. Still hoping for that last minute at the hospital where she just pulls out a random normal name and goes with it.

c

Good luck. You could go the earworm route....

rsrc.psychologytoday.com

Saoirse, Saoirse, Saoirse

/of course I've just cursed you if you're unsuccessful. Sorry about that
2012-10-20 12:28:32 PM  
1 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: 'Anacin' is a beautiful name. Hardly ever hear that any more.


So is Petocin. It has that get up and get things moving vibe about it.
2012-10-20 12:27:12 PM  
1 votes:

snake_beater: Wow, and I felt weird for wanting to name a girl Samara.

Arthur Jumbles: Looks like the Asians are the only one's with any sense. Why do stupid people give their children silly names? Are they trying to be unique? Stick it to the name? If you have an IQ below 95 does the name "John" cause your ears to bleed?

I'd say that would be your answer.


Well, it IS important to give your child a unique name. I mean, without a truly unique name, people like Stephen King, Michael Jackson, Will Smith, Steve Martin, Bill Clinton, John Williams, and James Brown would never have been able to become successful.
2012-10-20 12:18:11 PM  
1 votes:

Shotgun Justice: My son was just born on Tues. Picked out his name (Atlas) months ago. Now it seems like every other movie coming out this month has Atlas in the title.


Just shrug it off.
2012-10-20 12:15:23 PM  
1 votes:

Ed_Severson: Named my boy Edison ... He comes from a long line of engineers and the name has a bit of a family relevance as well. It's unique and nobody should ever have trouble spelling it. Win.

Baby #2 of unknown gender is on the way. I feel like we have our work cut out for us now.


Nicola is way too obvious.
2012-10-20 12:12:51 PM  
1 votes:
I went to school with Thorin Oakenshield **** (last name reacted).
2012-10-20 12:10:05 PM  
1 votes:

rickythepenguin: Shyla: Currently trying to talk my daughter out of naming her daughter Saorise. I have 2 months left and I'm afraid I'm not going to be successful.


I WANTED THAT NAME TOO!

I wanted Saoirse, Caiomhe, and a few other Irish ones which I forget. Wife shot them all down for predictable reason. then, a few months after our daughter was born, i ran into an Irish woman at the store and we started talkign (not many Irish in phoenix) and she had a daughter naemd Caiomhe.


Seriously, all Americans who claim "Irish" ancestory, be it your mother was run train on by the sons of hibernia, or a guy named Sean was within a block of you at the moment of conception:

Stop giving your kids gaelic names that no one can pronounce, like Siobhan. I know you get a tingle in your genitals every time you get to explain to a perplexed teacher "Its pronounced Shivaaaahn"

It doesn't make you any more Irish, doesn't make your kid any more Irish, and will likely get their asses kicked.

/my plastic Paddy mom tried to name me Padraigh. My dad said that he would name me after the dog before he let her spell it that way.
2012-10-20 12:09:41 PM  
1 votes:

rickythepenguin: Scaevola: 2. Guy whose last name was Dickreiter.


Your mom is a dickreiter.


*golf clap*

//which I caught from your Mom.
2012-10-20 12:09:21 PM  
1 votes:
CSB time: We searched and searched for a name for a girl last year when my wife was pregnant, and eventually settled on the strategy of each of us making a list. Then, we would narrow the list down by those names that matched. None of them did. As my wife went through my list, every single name got vetoed as a first name, but "Jo" hung on as a middle name (It's my mom's middle name). My wife was hell-bent on picking the name "Raelyn", taking it from her dad's middle name of "Rae". She announced that she liked the name "Raelyn Jo", to which my response was, "Oh, that name sounds like it comes from a trailer park!" My wife looked very hurt at that exclamation, so I let it be. Raelyn Jo is sitting next to me in her swing right now while mom is at work.
My dad and sisters have called her Rae-J since birth. My wife hates that.
2012-10-20 12:09:04 PM  
1 votes:

The_Original_Roxtar: My name is fairly "normal", but through some curse of language, nobody can ever spell it correctly.
My last name is the German version of a common English surname. Sounds the same, but has another letter in it (sch vs sh). My first name is the Scottish version of another English name, so everyone defaults to the English spelling.

If I just say my name, it will invariably be spelled incorrectly, so I have to spell it every time.


Geoffry shiatface??
2012-10-20 12:05:51 PM  
1 votes:
Poor little Candida Albicans.
2012-10-20 12:04:57 PM  
1 votes:

Swiss Colony: My wife and I can't decide on a name for our daughter due early next year. We've a non-finalised short list of Alison, Julia or Sofia. We already have one daughter called Catherine.


Sofia is a beautiful name - one of my faves. And there will be at least four others in her class.
2012-10-20 12:02:18 PM  
1 votes:
At my old job we would automatically shiatcan any application with a stupid, stupid name on the grounds that the apple never falls far from the tree. Probably made us racist, but we were just too damn lazy to go thru the paperwork hassle of firing dumbasses.
2012-10-20 12:00:37 PM  
1 votes:

silo123j: I named one of my daughters Emily... there are a ton of them out there. But I chose the female variation of my father's name. Boy does she act like it.

My other daughters name is Margaret, the regular old damn spelling. She goes by Maggie.

No one has trouble with their names.

\csb
\\screw them for thinking they are so damn clever.


^^^^THIS. My two daughters are Elizabeth and Margaret, although I did want to name them Polly and Esther.
2012-10-20 11:57:37 AM  
1 votes:
It's pronounced "Ahs-wee-pay".
2012-10-20 11:57:22 AM  
1 votes:

Shyla: Currently trying to talk my daughter out of naming her daughter Saorise. I have 2 months left and I'm afraid I'm not going to be successful.



I WANTED THAT NAME TOO!

I wanted Saoirse, Caiomhe, and a few other Irish ones which I forget. Wife shot them all down for predictable reason. then, a few months after our daughter was born, i ran into an Irish woman at the store and we started talkign (not many Irish in phoenix) and she had a daughter naemd Caiomhe.
2012-10-20 11:56:24 AM  
1 votes:

Shyla: 'Seer-sha'


3.bp.blogspot.com
2012-10-20 11:56:13 AM  
1 votes:

Swiss Colony: My wife and I can't decide on a name for our daughter due early next year. We've a non-finalised short list of Alison, Julia or Sofia. We already have one daughter called Catherine.


Have you considered 'Sinutab'?
2012-10-20 11:53:08 AM  
1 votes:
Parents should be ashamed/feel regret. These kids have to go all the way through life with this horrible creations.
Some of personal favorites from school
A'Mircale
Frankeshia
Jamesicia
Daleshawn
Archavia

I also have a Jayden, Kaden, Brannen, and a Kaitlyn.
2012-10-20 11:52:23 AM  
1 votes:
Sinutab Macarthur Xiao
Sinutab Bobbie-Jo McWillingsford
Sinutab Saorise McMacher
Sinutab Jaeger McMeister
Sinutab Mickey Rourke
2012-10-20 11:51:43 AM  
1 votes:
My sons are named after their grandfathers. Easy. One is Zane, the other John. My son, John, is the only John in his entire school. It's the new 'unique' name!!!
2012-10-20 11:48:32 AM  
1 votes:

lohphat: NewportBarGuy: Sinutab?

Hahahahaha...

Nice.

[img69.imageshack.us image 479x403]


Ha. Got some suburban bourgeois friends who imported/adopted two Chinese designer kids.
They named them Charlie and Mary.

/Now they're separated and headed for divorce.
//Hee-haw.
2012-10-20 11:46:35 AM  
1 votes:
One of the profs that runs a lab in my microbiology grad program supposedly names his kids Serine and Alanine
2012-10-20 11:36:58 AM  
1 votes:
You hardly ever see any Gertrudes anymore.

Bring back Gertrude!
2012-10-20 09:17:53 AM  
1 votes:
I never got along with my father, but he kept me from being named "Huey," because it was the first object mom saw from the window when I was born on a USAF base overseas.

I was 8 or 9 when Huey Lewis and the News were a big deal. That would have been untold 'nad punches. No kid in my generation was named Huey. At least none at my schools.

Thanks Dad, for talking sense to her.
2012-10-20 09:04:53 AM  
1 votes:
Good. I hope they continue to have regrets.
2012-10-20 08:38:07 AM  
1 votes:

cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline


Why? Those are all white kid names around here. Well, maybe not the last two jokey ones.
 
/not subby
2012-10-20 08:35:00 AM  
1 votes:

cretinbob: Well that's an incredibly racist headline


What's racist about it?

/not subby
 
Displayed 127 of 127 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report