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(Deadline)   Emmanuelle in Heaven   (deadline.com) divider line 190
    More: Sad, Emmanuelle, erotic films, Get Smart, Concorde, American films, Lady Chatterley  
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11564 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 18 Oct 2012 at 8:56 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2MS
2012-10-18 03:55:47 PM

Texian: Debeo Summa Credo: exparrot: EngineerBoy: gunga galunga: TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel

OK, anybody mind splainin' this to us tards what don't get it?

That's what a scrambled premium channel used to look like in the days before digital boxes, meaning if your cable company offered a naughty channel, you could tune your TV to that channel and see the scrambled version, which had skewed video (as seen in this pic) and full sound. So, you could hear the action, and catch glimpses of the general goings-on if you tilted your head and squinted.

Our tv had a 'fine tune' knob, and if you turned it jussst soooooo you had a jittery but totally viewable screen.
Of course, you had to constantly keep twiddling the knob.

/on the TV, of course.

I used to have to race to get one off because if I stared at the scrambled screen too long I'd get a painful headache behind my eyes.

My parents had one of the old slide-selector cable boxes that you had to click the little arrow pointer from channel to channel. If you got it just right between 13 & 14, you could get an almost perfectly clear picture and sound for Cinemax. But a squrriel fart in the next county would bump it off tap dead center enough to suddenly be watching Mexican TV test-patterns. I would have to get off the couch, pull up my shorts, and go adjust it again.

I blame my early sexual encounters with actual partners setting land-speed records on being trained to rub oe out fast enough not to have to finish to mariachi music.


Dude, someone I finally understand!!!
 
2012-10-18 04:04:02 PM
Farking cancer. Again. Fark you cancer.
 
2012-10-18 04:04:44 PM
Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?
 
2012-10-18 04:10:45 PM
Sometimes you'd see a Tinto Brass movie in the mix on Cinemax. That man was an artist.
 
2012-10-18 04:28:27 PM

I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?


Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.
 
2012-10-18 04:37:03 PM

2MS: Texian: Debeo Summa Credo: exparrot: EngineerBoy: gunga galunga: TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel

OK, anybody mind splainin' this to us tards what don't get it?

That's what a scrambled premium channel used to look like in the days before digital boxes, meaning if your cable company offered a naughty channel, you could tune your TV to that channel and see the scrambled version, which had skewed video (as seen in this pic) and full sound. So, you could hear the action, and catch glimpses of the general goings-on if you tilted your head and squinted.

Our tv had a 'fine tune' knob, and if you turned it jussst soooooo you had a jittery but totally viewable screen.
Of course, you had to constantly keep twiddling the knob.

/on the TV, of course.

I used to have to race to get one off because if I stared at the scrambled screen too long I'd get a painful headache behind my eyes.

My parents had one of the old slide-selector cable boxes that you had to click the little arrow pointer from channel to channel. If you got it just right between 13 & 14, you could get an almost perfectly clear picture and sound for Cinemax. But a squrriel fart in the next county would bump it off tap dead center enough to suddenly be watching Mexican TV test-patterns. I would have to get off the couch, pull up my shorts, and go adjust it again.

I blame my early sexual encounters with actual partners setting land-speed records on being trained to rub oe out fast enough not to have to finish to mariachi music.

Dude, someone I finally understand!!!


Catholics?
 
2012-10-18 04:43:49 PM
Wow this thread is a trip in the wayback machine. Kids today got it easy with their internet porn. Back in the day we would either get scrambled porn, or if ya got the pay channels soft core porn, if you were lucky you could find dads stash of nudie mags and every once in a while a friend would have some real porn on a VHS tape that a cousin got from a guy who got it from his uncle.

/off my lawn!
 
2MS
2012-10-18 04:50:59 PM

StoPPeRmobile: 2MS: Texian: Debeo Summa Credo: exparrot: EngineerBoy: gunga galunga: TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel

OK, anybody mind splainin' this to us tards what don't get it?

That's what a scrambled premium channel used to look like in the days before digital boxes, meaning if your cable company offered a naughty channel, you could tune your TV to that channel and see the scrambled version, which had skewed video (as seen in this pic) and full sound. So, you could hear the action, and catch glimpses of the general goings-on if you tilted your head and squinted.

Our tv had a 'fine tune' knob, and if you turned it jussst soooooo you had a jittery but totally viewable screen.
Of course, you had to constantly keep twiddling the knob.

/on the TV, of course.

I used to have to race to get one off because if I stared at the scrambled screen too long I'd get a painful headache behind my eyes.

My parents had one of the old slide-selector cable boxes that you had to click the little arrow pointer from channel to channel. If you got it just right between 13 & 14, you could get an almost perfectly clear picture and sound for Cinemax. But a squrriel fart in the next county would bump it off tap dead center enough to suddenly be watching Mexican TV test-patterns. I would have to get off the couch, pull up my shorts, and go adjust it again.

I blame my early sexual encounters with actual partners setting land-speed records on being trained to rub oe out fast enough not to have to finish to mariachi music.

Dude, someone I finally understand!!!

Catholics?


No. Why mariachi music has a strange sort of excitement for me.
 
2012-10-18 04:57:13 PM

groppet: Wow this thread is a trip in the wayback machine. Kids today got it easy with their internet porn


Maybe I'm showing my age, but I'm glad I have memories of softcore porn on Skinemax instead of the hardcore stuff on the internet. Decades later, I remember the movies mentioned in this thread.This has been a fun thread for a lot of us. You think thirty years from now the kiddies of today will reminisce over "redhead gets a facial" that that watched on Spankwire?
 
2012-10-18 04:58:26 PM

scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.


That's right. Awesome. Thanks for the reminder.
 
2012-10-18 05:03:39 PM

2MS: StoPPeRmobile: 2MS: Texian: Debeo Summa Credo: exparrot: EngineerBoy: gunga galunga: TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel

OK, anybody mind splainin' this to us tards what don't get it?

That's what a scrambled premium channel used to look like in the days before digital boxes, meaning if your cable company offered a naughty channel, you could tune your TV to that channel and see the scrambled version, which had skewed video (as seen in this pic) and full sound. So, you could hear the action, and catch glimpses of the general goings-on if you tilted your head and squinted.

Our tv had a 'fine tune' knob, and if you turned it jussst soooooo you had a jittery but totally viewable screen.
Of course, you had to constantly keep twiddling the knob.

/on the TV, of course.

I used to have to race to get one off because if I stared at the scrambled screen too long I'd get a painful headache behind my eyes.

My parents had one of the old slide-selector cable boxes that you had to click the little arrow pointer from channel to channel. If you got it just right between 13 & 14, you could get an almost perfectly clear picture and sound for Cinemax. But a squrriel fart in the next county would bump it off tap dead center enough to suddenly be watching Mexican TV test-patterns. I would have to get off the couch, pull up my shorts, and go adjust it again.

I blame my early sexual encounters with actual partners setting land-speed records on being trained to rub oe out fast enough not to have to finish to mariachi music.

Dude, someone I finally understand!!!

Catholics?

No. Why mariachi music has a strange sort of excitement for me.


Not gonna lie, some quality time in Edinburgh, Alice, and San Antonio when I was younger might also factor in.
 
2012-10-18 05:04:35 PM

scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.


Wasn't there a big-boobed bubbly blonde who hosted that too? Rhonda something?
 
2012-10-18 05:13:13 PM

Hawk24: Wasn't there a big-boobed bubbly blonde who hosted that too? Rhonda something?



Rhonda Shear
 
2012-10-18 05:16:56 PM

Hawk24: scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.

Wasn't there a big-boobed bubbly blonde who hosted that too? Rhonda something?


Rhonda Shear? Redhead right? USA UP All Night!
 
2012-10-18 05:29:51 PM
I fixed a vcr one time for a friend and he asked how I learned to fix them...I said when you get one of your dad's porno's stuck in a vcr...you learn real quick how to take the thing apart and get it fixed.
 
2012-10-18 05:39:33 PM
The original "Who's Line is it Anyway?" always had that one audience member who suggested Emmanuelle as part of a sketch. The only thing funnier than the resulting skit was how many people knew what that movie was.
 
2012-10-18 05:50:11 PM
Ah, yes. The Emmanuelle movies. Where else could you go to see a 13-year-old as the primary sex object in a movie. (No wonder that girl never made another movie.)
 
2012-10-18 06:10:29 PM

zappaisfrank: one0nine: EngineerBoy: gunga galunga: TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel

OK, anybody mind splainin' this to us tards what don't get it?

That's what a scrambled premium channel used to look like in the days before digital boxes, meaning if your cable company offered a naughty channel, you could tune your TV to that channel and see the scrambled version, which had skewed video (as seen in this pic) and full sound. So, you could hear the action, and catch glimpses of the general goings-on if you tilted your head and squinted.

And if you messed around with the dial on your cable box just right and found that "sweet spot" between the channel clicks, every once in a while God would reward you with a glimpse of grainy, green titties in action.

/They didn't call it "Skinemax" for nothin'...
//1980s kid
///lawn, off, etc

I had a TV that had a fine tuning adjustment for each channel that you could tweak just right and the premium channels would be visible most of the time, not always, and usually in black and white and substandard sound, but it was better than nothing.


Flippin through channels was the best way!

/1980s - We fall into this category already?! Ahh shiet
//Loads shotgun, or did I?
 
2012-10-18 06:28:53 PM
Squiggly porn and porn in the woods.

Ah the 80's.
 
2012-10-18 06:45:38 PM

strangeguitar: I was 12 in 1982. My parents finally got cable. They went away and left me alone for the weekend. There was a channel called WHT or something (they had a black cat as their symbol). They showed 3 of her flicks in a row. I killed more (potential) children then Pol Pot.


I could have posted the exact same comment but I was 14 and for me it was a cable precursor called "Select TV". Also sneaked into a showing of Private Lessons. I'm guessing Sylvia was one of the first fully nude women seen by pretty much every male of our generation. Pretty innocent compared to kids and the internet today.
 
2012-10-18 06:47:12 PM

TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel


Now THAT is how you spice up an otherwise dull meme.
 
2012-10-18 06:50:24 PM

scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.


Well Fridays had Rhonda Sheer(shear?), and Saturday nights had Gilbert, or vice versa. I remember spending many a late Friday and Saturday night watching USA hoping that they'd forget to cut to a commercial or forget to edit out a nude scene.
 
2012-10-18 07:57:17 PM
Please remember that this is the "two m" Emmanuelle.

For your education: Link
 
2012-10-18 08:33:44 PM

groppet: Wow this thread is a trip in the wayback machine. Kids today got it easy with their internet porn. Back in the day we would either get scrambled porn, or if ya got the pay channels soft core porn, if you were lucky you could find dads stash of nudie mags and every once in a while a friend would have some real porn on a VHS tape that a cousin got from a guy who got it from his uncle.

/off my lawn!


Speaking of stashes, I was 14 when all soft focus porn was big. We're talking Oui, Chic, some others. So, this is around 1979-1980 (fixes onion belt), and my older brother gets his first job, as a garbageman. He spent the first week throwing up.
But, oh, the second week! He comes home with a HUGE stash of nudie mags. We're talking the horny of plenty here. I turns out that, with no recycling back then, kind purveyors and enthusiasts of porn would put out the garbage, but lay the used mags on top of the can, knowing full well that the garbagemen would grab them. Every day my brother would show up with at least one mag, if not more. We actually looked down on Playboy and Hustler, because the French mags had actual penetration.
That was a good summer.
 
2012-10-18 08:46:18 PM

Barricaded Gunman: t I'm looking to buy a copy of it for a research project,


Pete Townsend outs himself on Fark.
 
2012-10-18 08:48:22 PM

R.A.Danny: gunga galunga: TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel

OK, anybody mind splainin' this to us tards what don't get it?

Come sit next to my rocker, son.

Back in the day, we didn't have this fancy cable telivision with 43 channels of HBO, Cinemax, and AMC, we had crapass stuff like ONTV.
This consisted of a shoebox sized settop box with a single knob. You would tune (analog, mind you) to channel three or four, depending on your service, and - oops, unplug the Telstar Ranger because there was only one input on your television, and hook up your "cable" and stand at the TV and turn it's channels until you saw something you liked. If you changed your mind about the show you would have to call your kids over to change the channel again. There were subscriptions available for late night viewing, and if you didn't subscribe, it came in scrambled. We're not talking about 256 bit encryption now, we're talking they would run the picture 50% to the right and make the lines wiggly. This is what we learned how to masturbate to. This is why we're a mess.


On our cable box, you could pop off the top and put some chewing gum wrapper around the stop for that particular channel and it would come through just fine.
 
2012-10-18 09:09:54 PM

TheraTx: [i.ytimg.com image 480x360]

R.I.P. Emmanuel


Hey, I think I've seen that one!

Seriously, +1 Internet to you.
 
2012-10-18 10:15:42 PM
Every teens dream 30 yrs ago was to be seduced by Sylvia Kristel a la Private Lessons

Sad to hear of her passing
 
2012-10-18 11:30:43 PM

TheraTx: R.I.P. Emmanuel


This may be the best comment in the history of Fark.

Well played.
 
2012-10-19 09:18:49 AM
Sometimes holding down 2 buttons at the same time made the picture clearer.
This cable box made me the man I am today.
 
2012-10-19 09:20:40 AM
farm3.static.flickr.com

Image was too large... (ironic), here it is.
 
2012-10-19 03:37:03 PM

GardenWeasel: TheraTx: R.I.P. Emmanuel

This may be is the best comment in the history of Fark.

Well played.


FIXED
 
2012-10-19 05:19:24 PM

Hawk24: scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.

Wasn't there a big-boobed bubbly blonde who hosted that too? Rhonda something?


For all the kids, this is also the time of Kung-Fu theatre, and MTV still played music videos.
 
2012-10-20 12:55:35 AM

Klaumbaz: Hawk24: scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.

Wasn't there a big-boobed bubbly blonde who hosted that too? Rhonda something?

For all the kids, this is also the time of Kung-Fu theatre, and MTV still played music videos.


Any idea the title or more info? Up All Night is matching the series with Christina Applegate and Will Arnett and Gilbert has no such series in his credits on IMDB.
 
2012-10-20 02:16:57 AM

theesir: [farm3.static.flickr.com image 500x375]

Image was too large... (ironic), here it is.


The first one I remember was the one with the big slide arrow, with the High/Low switch. Later, was the little box with the dial. Of course, there was also many, many models with channels A, B, C, D, E, and so on.
 
2012-10-20 02:56:04 AM

strapp3r: macadamnut: This thread reminded me of this:

[bt.eutorrents.com image 434x586]

Cinemax, you magnificent bastard!

David Hamilton was a serious lamb connoisseur

/tooooo young


Yeah, that and Laura and Bilitis, each of which featured naked 12-to-16-year-olds, a shower scene in Laura and a skinny-dip scene in Bilitis. Hard to believe today, but no one except a few tight-ass redneck sheriffs ever went after them.
 
2012-10-20 06:05:53 AM

theesir: [farm3.static.flickr.com image 500x375]

Image was too large... (ironic), here it is.


I'm getting flashbacks!
 
2012-10-20 10:20:20 AM

therecksays: Klaumbaz: Hawk24: scandalrag: I rite gud: Didn't USA Network used to run Up All Night or something like that on Fridays? They would show the badly dubbed euro porn movies and just cut to commercial at the start of ever hot scene. I think that's the first place I saw Emmaunuel.

/Am I imagining that?

Nope. It was hosted by Gilbert Gottfried. He explained it as:

We take a movie that the only reason to watch is for the nudity and we remove the nudity.

Wasn't there a big-boobed bubbly blonde who hosted that too? Rhonda something?

For all the kids, this is also the time of Kung-Fu theatre, and MTV still played music videos.

Any idea the title or more info? Up All Night is matching the series with Christina Applegate and Will Arnett and Gilbert has no such series in his credits on IMDB.


USA Up All Night
 
2012-10-20 10:59:00 PM
macadamnut: Häschen in der Grube

Damn, thanks for the info... that's farther than I've gotten so far.
 
2012-10-21 08:46:26 AM
I liked the skinemax Emmanuelle on a train and of course, all the Tokyo eps, and the Godiva one...
 
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