FARK.com: (7377378) There are only four ways to arouse a woman. "Being a rich douchenozzle" surprisingly not on the list

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		There are only four ways to arouse a woman. "Being a rich douchenozzle" surprisingly not on the list (huffingtonpost.com)		39
		More: Unlikely, sexology, Alfred Kinsey, sex therapy, Sensual Type

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13677 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Oct 2012 at 4:38 AM | Favorite | share:

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God-is-a-Taco		2012-10-12 04:49:49 AM

13 votes:

MadSkillz: I can attract women, and god knows how, because i'm not handsome, and i'm most definitely obese, and half the time when i do attract them i am completely oblivious.

www.universetoday.com

God Is My Co-Pirate		2012-10-11 08:40:23 PM

9 votes:

brap: If I were that woman I'd title my blog, Petra Dishes.

"All about culture!"

EZ Writer		2012-10-12 10:34:54 AM

2 votes:

What's the fourth one?

EZ Writer		2012-10-12 10:01:50 AM

2 votes:

My woman is aroused by a clean kitchen.

/I have to be there in 26 minutes
//Nooner!

Gulper Eel		2012-10-12 06:54:48 AM

2 votes:

So, we have all these possibilities before we stampede towards the clitoris, Watson.

Heist		2012-10-12 06:41:38 AM

2 votes:

I'm glad this is what decades of feminism have brought us: Instead of treating all women as a single, monolithic group, we've realized that all women are different, (just like us men-folk!) and we can now lump them into four groups instead of one. Step right up, ladies, we're recognizing you as individuals! Now find out what arouses you, based on this short questionnaire.

TheOther		2012-10-12 05:26:29 AM

2 votes:

...tasting something erotic...

Chloroform?

Fark Me To Tears		2012-10-12 01:06:04 AM

2 votes:

I'm confused.

With which of these four types does the bowling-ball-finger-grip come into play?

Benevolent Misanthrope		2012-10-12 01:00:16 AM

2 votes:

Obviously not written by a lesbian.

Makh		2012-10-12 12:23:47 AM

2 votes:

The one I am with is the cognitive type. D&D gets her happy and aroused. I could miss dinner because I was out too late with a female friend, and that's ok, but if I don't have plot for her character by the end of the week, I'm a dead man.

brap		2012-10-11 08:26:09 PM

2 votes:

If I were that woman I'd title my blog, Petra Dishes.

WhippingBoy		2012-10-12 02:02:45 PM

1 votes:

kiwimoogle84: Clemkadidlefark: Does this truism apply under Attractor or Sensual? Maybe Intellectual? I don't know but it's the most surefire way I witnessed.

(apparently money has its own very special pheromone)

Only if you want a shallow gold digger with no brain who is incapable of earning her own salary.

What does she look like?

Deman		2012-10-12 10:11:46 AM

1 votes:

Hey, they mentioned 50 Shades of Grey in TFA. Can we turn this into a BDSM thread because of that?

WhippingBoy		2012-10-12 10:00:27 AM

1 votes:

kiwimoogle84: SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: Be a challenge in arcade games, crack me up, and appreciate my good cooking.

Seriously, it's not that hard.

Not true. Some arcade games are really hard

If you can beat mr at either metal slug, Soul Calibur, or out score me in Rampage, you've won my heart (as long as I get to play Lizzie)

Whew. For a minute there, I thought you meant real arcade games...

www.avians.net

kiwimoogle84		2012-10-12 09:31:43 AM

1 votes:

SuperChuck: kiwimoogle84: Be a challenge in arcade games, crack me up, and appreciate my good cooking.

Seriously, it's not that hard.

Not true. Some arcade games are really hard

If you can beat mr at either metal slug, Soul Calibur, or out score me in Rampage, you've won my heart (as long as I get to play Lizzie)

Thisbymaster		2012-10-12 09:03:21 AM

1 votes:

I can't speak about all women but the ones attracted to me are insane.

AssAsInAssassin		2012-10-12 08:36:34 AM

1 votes:

orbister: [www.shannons.com.au image 375x250]

/p j o'rourke

Author of "Eat the Rich Douchenozzle"

traylor		2012-10-12 08:31:55 AM

1 votes:

Subby almost got me. I was reading the second word of TFA when suddenly, why do I care?

fragMasterFlash		2012-10-12 08:22:15 AM

1 votes:

Oh yeah, lets get some McDonalds, baby.
We can super-size it for reals.

God-is-a-Taco		2012-10-12 06:56:24 AM

1 votes:

SkunkWerks:
It's a fat joke Stephen Hawking told about yo mama once.

I couldn't help it.
He used the word "attract", mentioned his obesity, and even said he was oblivious of the force he exerted on them.

I'm only human!

SkunkWerks		2012-10-12 06:16:30 AM

1 votes:

Pray 4 Mojo: Disgruntled Goat: FTFA: "The Cognitive Type is head-oriented..."

I'll take one of those.

Just don't marry her.

I'ma do it.

SkunkWerks		2012-10-12 06:13:59 AM

1 votes:

Public Savant: jtown: God-is-a-Taco: MadSkillz: I can attract women, and god knows how, because i'm not handsome, and i'm most definitely obese, and half the time when i do attract them i am completely oblivious.

[www.universetoday.com image 640x480]

What the He...What is this? What is this some kind of gag?

No, the women just gravitate towards him.

It's a fat joke Stephen Hawking told about yo mama once.

Disgruntled Goat		2012-10-12 06:12:56 AM

1 votes:

FTFA: "The Cognitive Type is head-oriented..."

I'll take one of those.

Deep Contact		2012-10-12 06:08:52 AM

1 votes:

Public Savant		2012-10-12 05:50:56 AM

1 votes:

jtown: God-is-a-Taco: MadSkillz: I can attract women, and god knows how, because i'm not handsome, and i'm most definitely obese, and half the time when i do attract them i am completely oblivious.

[www.universetoday.com image 640x480]

What the He...What is this? What is this some kind of gag?

No, the women just gravitate towards him.

TheOther		2012-10-12 05:44:58 AM

1 votes:

CujoQuarrel		2012-10-12 05:19:18 AM

1 votes:

MadSkillz: I can attract women, and god knows how, because i'm not handsome, and i'm most definitely obese, and half the time when i do attract them i am completely oblivious.

It must be charm? Or my commanding eyebrows? Dunno.

Do you stand around in bars licking these eyebrows?
That would work

Enemabag Jones		2012-10-12 05:17:28 AM

1 votes:

Women always say they like funny guys.

Maybe we should try that.

Ghastly		2012-10-12 05:01:54 AM

1 votes:

God-is-a-Taco: MadSkillz: I can attract women, and god knows how, because i'm not handsome, and i'm most definitely obese, and half the time when i do attract them i am completely oblivious.

[www.universetoday.com image 640x480]

You made me laugh so hard I literally ended up spilling my beer.

Pray 4 Mojo		2012-10-12 04:54:40 AM

1 votes:

Why don't they have these articles for men?

Oh... yeah... right.

Spad31		2012-10-12 04:34:14 AM

1 votes:

elementalogic: If I've learned anything in my time on this planet it's that you can't simply divide women into these narrow, strictly defined categories. Every single woman I've ever been with has been completely unique and has had any number of perpetually changing factors and variables that affect her mood and level of arousal. I stopped trying to create a standard roadmap to arousal a long time ago.

Now, after years of trying vainly to quantify their behaviour into some kind of logical pattern, I just roll with the punches. I know my wife and I have a broad understanding of what makes her tick. I know that when I pay attention to her, show her some affection and do things to make her life easier my actions will be reciprocated in kind. I know that if our relationship is in a healthy place, the chances for sexytime increase exponentially. That's all the information I need.

Wow. I've never had to work so hard for her. Must be you. Have you just told her you want teh sexay-time and for her to put on the right panties so you can rip them off and throw them on the floor? I know she likes that.

/I keed. Have a great Friday!

fusillade762		2012-10-12 02:52:10 AM

1 votes:

jaylectricity: Describe a real sexual fantasy that you have had in the past 4 weeks to increase arousal/orgasm. (Give as much or little detail as your feel comfortable)

Ya know, I was gonna do the test for the sake of this thread...but this question just creeped me out.

Sounds like they're just looking for people to write them free wank material.

MadSkillz		2012-10-12 01:50:25 AM

1 votes:

I can attract women, and god knows how, because i'm not handsome, and i'm most definitely obese, and half the time when i do attract them i am completely oblivious.

It must be charm? Or my commanding eyebrows? Dunno.

jaylectricity		2012-10-12 12:14:25 AM

1 votes:

Describe a real sexual fantasy that you have had in the past 4 weeks to increase arousal/orgasm. (Give as much or little detail as your feel comfortable)

Ya know, I was gonna do the test for the sake of this thread...but this question just creeped me out.

jaylectricity		2012-10-11 11:53:06 PM

1 votes:

Nope. I'm a little bit of two of those. Myth busted.

Generation_D		2012-10-11 10:03:59 PM

1 votes:

I didn't see the Buy Her Lots of Things So She Can Show Off Her Status attractor type on the list. Weird.

BarkingUnicorn		2012-10-11 09:19:21 PM

1 votes:

To learn your arousal type, complete this highly personal survey and give us your email address. Never mind who "us" are.

AYFKM???

One Bad Apple		2012-10-11 08:49:24 PM

1 votes:

brap: If I were that woman I'd title my blog, Petra Dishes.

Petra Dishes is my Anthrax tribute band name

fusillade762		2012-10-11 08:41:51 PM

1 votes:

I'm definitely an Attractor Type.

I know, no one asked, but there it is.

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