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(The Sun)   Dear Deidre: My girlfriend thinks I'm gay. What should I do?   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 29
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14749 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Oct 2012 at 9:37 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
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Archived thread
2012-10-10 09:35:08 PM
11 votes:
Ask for a threeway with her hottest female friend so you can test it once and for all?
2012-10-11 03:24:56 AM
9 votes:
Then my girlfriend found some old stuff on my computer going back to my early teens

You mean she's so insecure and emotionally immature that she felt the need to check up on your actions from years before you were dating? Gay or not, you should cut your losses kid. There's only more drama down this road.
2012-10-11 09:44:43 AM
4 votes:

SlothB77: NuttierThanEver: to bring back an old FARK meme

Fark her cat.

[www.blorgh.blogger.com.br image 626x696]

that cannot be real.


Facepalm.

/ of course it's real, it's in front of you. It's just not authentic.

//yes, I'm a philosopher.
2012-10-11 09:52:10 AM
3 votes:

LordZorch: Straight men have never been "confused" or "attracted to both girls and boys", but lots of gay men have had this happen to them...


Actually more accurate studies have been coming out regarding male sexuality recently because the myth that there's no such thing as a bi-man, just a gay in denial has been challenged by flawed studies. They've contested in the past that bi-sexual volunteers in the past were in fact gay all the while and just sleeping with men while not even giving women a chance. On the flip side it's also hypothesized that there were bi men who would only allow themselves to sleep with women or didn't want to be thought of as gay if they admitted to any attraction to men. Now a days, what with guys being more open and flexible about discussing sexuality, researchers are finding actual genuine bi-sexual men to volunteer for their studies.
2012-10-11 09:48:47 AM
3 votes:
1. Figure out if you're gay. If you are, escape girlfriend and have a better life elsewhere.
2. Tell her to stop being passive aggressive and to complain about what she's really upset about. This whole "you might be gay" thing is usually an angular attack.
2012-10-11 08:35:32 AM
3 votes:
He should perform oral sex on her. This is along the same stuff of nightmares to gay men as a straight guy being forced to give head to another dude. No 'mo worth his rainbow card would ever want to do this. So lick the slit, and do it well, and tell her how much you love it.

She'll never think you're gay again.
2012-10-10 11:36:26 PM
3 votes:
Straight men have never been "confused" or "attracted to both girls and boys", but lots of gay men have had this happen to them...
2012-10-11 10:27:14 AM
2 votes:
TFA: "She's been my best friend for years and we share all the same friends. If I lose her I lose everything that's important to me."

Teenagers.

On the drama scale, 17-year-old bi-curious in-love-forever emo kids rank pretty high, even if they are obviously fictional.
2012-10-11 10:20:05 AM
2 votes:
Dear Bi Curious,

You are obviously not gay with a "but" ... and I might add, this is a farking gigantic "but", a "but" which makes Roseanne's butt look svelte and petite. This is a People of WalMart calibre fart cannon. This is the Big Bertha of "buts".

Since you "were" attracted to both boys and girls when you "were" a teenager, and since you are a teenager still at 17, you are clearly attracted to both boys and girls. This does not make you gay. It makes you bi.

Get off the farking fence, Mugwump! If your girl sticks with you she is sure to find other men's lipstick on your shorts eventually. There is no farking way you have converted from "gay" to "straight" because you never were either and because your natural inclination is a see-saw, Bubbela.

What's love got to do, got to do, got to do with it?

Love is a hormonal imbalance that lasts long enough to procreate and raise a child to three years of age before dumping your mate for a new guy pal with bigger and better teeth or claws. It's evolution. Sexual attraction is, unlike diamonds, forever. A diamond is extremely brittle and thus frangile, while it will literally evaporate in a fire because it is nearly pure carbon. So is love. But sexual attraction goes on longer than the ability to perform. Strong drink is a mocker, he puts on and puts off, etc., etc.

Now get out there and play the damn field, cutie pie. You're completely worthless as breeding stock unless some cougar wants to have a baby without the expense of supporting a man child like every other woman in God's creation. Spread your seed to women who don't care if you help with the breakfast dishes. Perhaps some day soon, an older gay man will rent your puerile ass until you are no longer "cute".

Society may grudgingly accept sex, whether gay or straight, but it doesn't have to accept Mugwumps. Fish or bait, dammit. If you're lucky, fish AND bait.

And what's with the name Deirdre? The British are sado-masochists, I know, but why keep inflicting this horrible, horrible name on unsuspecting and innocent babies? I wouldn't name a syphillitic three-legged dog Deirdre. You might as well name a child Morilla or Ludwig van Moist. It's a vile name and I believe in the Shandian Theory of Nominal Determinism. This is why you don't know anybody named Tristram. With luck, you probably don't know any Deirdres either.

The French have gotten this right--choose a name from the approved list. If it isn't on the list, somebody with more common sense and decency than you has decided that it is no name to afflict upon a child, even if she is Paris Hilton's brat by one of the various queer men she dates.

And what is with the names of those beggers? Doesn't she know any Bobs or Bills? I haven't seen a normal human being date her yet. A case in point to your right: she's now "dating" a spoiled biotch named Viperella or something outlandish. The girl is a freak show and all of her boyfriends are carnival geeks with too much money. Sheesh! I've seen the homes of rich Gypsies in Romania and they have more taste, discretion and restraint than' can be found in the entire Kilttown family, or for that matter, Donald Frump.

But I digress while Paris transgresses.

Is Paris burning? After that last little tryst, very probably.
2012-10-11 10:06:10 AM
2 votes:

sodomizer: This whole "you might be gay" thing is usually an angular attack.


I think this pretty much sums it up.
2012-10-11 09:55:13 AM
2 votes:
fark the shiat out of her, duh
2012-10-11 09:51:17 AM
2 votes:
It's all made up.

17 year olds don't use chat rooms and wouldn't have chat logs from 2 or 3 years ago. Furthermore it would take an amazingly talented teen girl to find ancient chat logs.

Deidre is probably in her mid 30's and operating off an extrapolation of what the geeks were doing when she was a teen.

/Work for years building boats and you're called a boat builder.
//Suck one cock and forever a cocksucker.
2012-10-11 08:49:59 AM
2 votes:
Just to prove that you're not gay, let me mail you a bunch of pamphlets about being gay.

Sounds like the girlfriend is a biatch for snooping.
2012-10-11 01:35:03 AM
2 votes:

kingoomieiii: I felt attracted to both girls and boys and I thought that meant I was gay. Then I met my girlfriend and fell in love and that's when I knew for a fact I'm straight.

That's not how that works, bro.


Seems pretty clear he's bi. Just go with it, best of both worlds, etc.
2012-10-11 12:30:02 AM
2 votes:
I felt attracted to both girls and boys and I thought that meant I was gay. Then I met my girlfriend and fell in love and that's when I knew for a fact I'm straight.

That's not how that works, bro.
2012-10-11 12:58:01 PM
1 votes:

Harry Freakstorm: Turn in your Man card, buy some fabulous clothes and accept the fact that you are gay. (NTTATWWT). Here are my reasons:

[snipped]

There's nothing wrong with being gay. Many gay people go on to live full and exciting lives. Here's hoping you find Mr. Right, settle down in that nice loft and raise a show quality Lhasa Apso.


It's somewhat funny that you don't even see the contradiction. "You're not a real man if you're gay, but I am in no way judging you."
2012-10-11 11:06:20 AM
1 votes:

JackieRabbit: The genders to which one is sexually attracted has nothing to do with sexual identity. Why is this concept so hard for people in the US to understand?


I just say "I don't care" about both, and that takes care of it. Unless I"m farking you--I don't care what you think, who you fark, or who you want to fark. Nunna my business.
2012-10-11 10:38:51 AM
1 votes:
She's just looking for an excuse to dump his sorry ass and not be vilified for it with questions like "Why did you break up with him and break his heart?" Using the gay excuse gives her a clean way out.
2012-10-11 10:36:40 AM
1 votes:

JackieRabbit: The genders to which one is sexually attracted has nothing to do with sexual identity. Why is this concept so hard for people in the US to understand?


Um, actually it is the definition of it. The only issue is that you also have to factor in aversion. A "straight" person is actually adverse to same-sex situations and would actually actively avoid it. A "bi" person isn't adverse to either, although may have a preference (probably the situation with this guy in the article). A "gay" person is adverse to opposite-sex situations. An "asexual" is adverse to both sexes.

I think it is important to include the aversion part, because if you only discuss attraction then situations like the guy in the article are "confused". It is pretty clear when you clarify that he's not adverse to guys.
2012-10-11 10:29:05 AM
1 votes:

KatjaMouse: LordZorch: Straight men have never been "confused" or "attracted to both girls and boys", but lots of gay men have had this happen to them...

Actually more accurate studies have been coming out regarding male sexuality recently because the myth that there's no such thing as a bi-man, just a gay in denial has been challenged by flawed studies. They've contested in the past that bi-sexual volunteers in the past were in fact gay all the while and just sleeping with men while not even giving women a chance. On the flip side it's also hypothesized that there were bi men who would only allow themselves to sleep with women or didn't want to be thought of as gay if they admitted to any attraction to men. Now a days, what with guys being more open and flexible about discussing sexuality, researchers are finding actual genuine bi-sexual men to volunteer for their studies.


I remember reading about this.

Here's what I recall. Yeah, they had studies saying that bisexual men were only gay men in denial. The problem is, that here was the methodology.

Find self-identified bisexual men.
Hook them up to a penile plesmograph (meter attached to the penis to gauge arousal)
Show them erotica of men and women, let the plesmograph gauge how aroused they are by the images.
Compare the results.

Yeah, of the self-identified bisexuals, pretty much all of them preferred males, or were only aroused by males.

Then they revisited it years later as the methodology was questioned. Instead of going with self-identification as a measure of bisexuality, they set out qualifications. I think they were something to the effect of:

1. Must have been in a monogamous relationship with a male, and a female, with both relationships lasting at least 6 months each.
2. Must have had sexual intercourse with multiple partners of each sex.

When repeating the test with males that had actually had been in long-term relationships with both sexes and had sex with multiple members of both sexes. . .surprise, they found that these people were aroused by both sexes, anywhere from clearly preferring males, to clearly preferring females, to being aroused roughly equally by both.

In other words, many self-identified bisexual men are gay men seeking to avoid a stigma or trying to convince themselves that they aren't strictly gay. However, actual bisexual men do exist, but they aren't always the first people to stand up and identify themselves as bisexual if you go asking for bi males.

/Had to write a paper about this in college.
2012-10-11 10:17:59 AM
1 votes:

JackieRabbit: The genders to which one is sexually attracted has nothing to do with sexual identity. Why is this concept so hard for people in the US to understand?


Because "sexual identity" does not exist. It's purely fabricated in an attempt to prevent a mental illness from being branded a mental illness.
2012-10-11 10:05:27 AM
1 votes:
I went through a confused stage when I was younger. I felt attracted to both girls and boys and I thought that meant I was gay. Then I met my girlfriend and fell in love and that's when I knew for a fact I'm straight. I've haven't given a thought to being gay since.

Then my girlfriend found some old stuff on my computer going back to my early teens. It was when I was seriously confused and depressed and I was talking to other gay teens about my life.

Now she's convinced that I'm gay. I've explained to her that this was just a stage that I went through when I was confused but she says she needs time to think about it.

This is tearing me apart because I'd just got comfortable with who I am and what I am, and now she thinks I'm gay. She's been my best friend for years and we share all the same friends. If I lose her I lose everything that's important to me.

She says we should stay away from each other for a couple of few days while she gets her head around it. This is devastating for me. I can't think about my school work or anything else. Please help me.


Turn in your Man card, buy some fabulous clothes and accept the fact that you are gay. (NTTATWWT). Here are my reasons:

a. You are a male and writing another human being about you emotions
b. You admit 'being confused'. If you get a boner looking at Sears bra ads, you are not gay.
c. You use the term "This is devastating to me" A non gay man would do pushup, get drunk or pick a fight with an weaker person rather than admit something 'devastated' him. "Devastated" to a non gay man happens only after he catches a live grenade in his hands..
d. When your girlfriend accused you of being gay, you did not push her to the ground, rip her cloths off and pile drive her in to sexual ecstasy.

There's nothing wrong with being gay. Many gay people go on to live full and exciting lives. Here's hoping you find Mr. Right, settle down in that nice loft and raise a show quality Lhasa Apso. You should probably send me all the photos of your girlfriend. Just rename them all with the "18YearOld" prefix just in case.
2012-10-11 10:05:15 AM
1 votes:

fireclown: That's because it doesn't get us attention from women.


Probably not from the women they'd like. But man oh man what I wouldn't do for hot boy-on-boy action at the bar.

/Queer as Folk was popular among straight women for a reason
2012-10-11 10:03:10 AM
1 votes:

Nemo's Brother: Guys aren't bi. They are gay or not. Girls are bi. "Straight" guys never kiss each other or fondle each other at a bar.


That's because it doesn't get us attention from women.
2012-10-11 09:55:23 AM
1 votes:
Dump that biatch for snooping around. If she doesn't respect you enough to not go though your shiat, then she doesn't deserve to be with you.

Then fark her sister.
2012-10-11 09:55:06 AM
1 votes:

JackieRabbit: The genders to which one is sexually attracted has nothing to do with sexual identity. Why is this concept so hard for people in the US to understand?


Probably because most of us are hetero and do not have GID. It is difficult for anyone who hasn't been there to understand, no matter where they may hail from originally. NTTAWW people who do have that difference (IMO), they're still people. It's just beyond my understanding, so it is strange/weird/freaky to me - and most likely to a significant part of the population. The difference is in how we actually treat those different from us.
2012-10-11 09:48:15 AM
1 votes:
Tell her to get hip to post-gender sexual enlightenment or hit the bricks.
2012-10-11 09:43:34 AM
1 votes:
Go fishing on Brokeback Mountain to clear your mind.
2012-10-10 09:40:10 PM
1 votes:
KHITBASH applies here, right?
 
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