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(CSPnet)   Heineken to change bottle for the first time since 1946. Drew left looking dazed, confused, green   (cspnet.com) divider line 41
    More: Weird, Heineken, Dos Equis, Heineken USA  
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13589 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Oct 2012 at 4:02 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-10-09 04:12:59 PM
6 votes:
2.bp.blogspot.com

There are some beers that just always seem to have a skunky bouquet like Molson Golden of Canada or Heineken of the Netherlands. I had just assumed that was how they were meant to be. I would be wrong. Skunkiness in beer is never a desirable feature for any brewer and is caused by light. A beer in a bottle, especially clear or green, is very susceptible to light. In particular, the bitter compounds in hops, isohumulones, break down very quickly and react with sulfur compounds in the beer. This produces MBT (3-methyl-2-butene-1-thiol), which not only smells like skunk, but is chemically very similar to a skunk's spray. It only takes a matter of hours of light for a beer to go skunky.

Cans and kegs offer the best protection for beers, but to be perfectly honest, I think a canned beer tastes like aluminum. Brown bottles also protect beer fairly well. But clear or green glass leaves the beer practically defenseless. Pilsners in green glass bottles notoriously go skunky. It's best to keep beer in a dark refrigerator.
2012-10-09 04:17:24 PM
4 votes:
*laughs at people who say they don't like Heineken because it tastes skunky*

Why can't you losers simply admit that you just don't like beer? Fermented grain tastes like fermented grain. That pisswater Bud you drink is made with rice in order to take away all the beer flavor, so that patsies like you can still feel manly about yourselves when you say that you are a beer drinker. In reality, Bud is little more than a Zima without the citrus flavor added. It tastes nothing like beer, it hardly even looks like beer, and only qualifies as beer on a technicality.

Face it...you just don't like beer. Which is ok, I'm not saying you should, or that you have to. Just trying to make sure you know how stupid what you are saying is.
2012-10-09 04:37:27 PM
3 votes:

MikeSass: *laughs at people who say they don't like Heineken because it tastes skunky*

Why can't you losers simply admit that you just don't like beer? Fermented grain tastes like fermented grain. That pisswater Bud you drink is made with rice in order to take away all the beer flavor, so that patsies like you can still feel manly about yourselves when you say that you are a beer drinker. In reality, Bud is little more than a Zima without the citrus flavor added. It tastes nothing like beer, it hardly even looks like beer, and only qualifies as beer on a technicality.

Face it...you just don't like beer. Which is ok, I'm not saying you should, or that you have to. Just trying to make sure you know how stupid what you are saying is.


While this isn't the dumbest thing I've ever read, it's definitely the dumbest thing I've read today.
2012-10-09 03:57:47 PM
3 votes:
New bottle, same skunky taste? No thanks.
2012-10-09 03:06:53 PM
3 votes:
It'll still taste like ass
2012-10-09 06:34:11 PM
2 votes:
farm4.static.flickr.com
2012-10-09 06:17:24 PM
2 votes:
Too bad they aren't bringing back the brick:

1.bp.blogspot.com

Or greenlighting the cube:

assets.inhabitat.com
2012-10-09 05:24:37 PM
2 votes:
i-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com 


You. Are. Welcome.
2012-10-09 04:40:14 PM
2 votes:
i50.tinypic.com
2012-10-09 04:16:21 PM
2 votes:

gweilo8888: In before the kiddies complain about skunky flav... oh, wait. Never mind.

/come back when your tastebuds develop


They already have, which is how they noticed Heineken tastes skunky. Other beer makers don't use green bottles for a reason.

/come back when you know why not
2012-10-09 04:15:14 PM
2 votes:
Pour it all down the sink because that's where it belongs!
2012-10-09 04:10:42 PM
2 votes:

gweilo8888: In before the kiddies complain about skunky flav... oh, wait. Never mind.

/come back when your tastebuds develop


Daf*ck you talkin' about?
Anyone who knows a flavor profile knows that shiate green beer is skunky.
2012-10-09 04:09:24 PM
2 votes:
In before the kiddies complain about skunky flav... oh, wait. Never mind.

/come back when your tastebuds develop
2012-10-09 03:30:20 PM
2 votes:

PainInTheASP: Personally I think that the best thing they could do would be to get rid of the stupid green bottle. Most of the time that I get Heineken these days, I find that it tastes skunky as hell. Maybe replacing the green bottle with a brown bottle will help this.


I thought that was how it was supposed to taste.
2012-10-09 03:26:28 PM
2 votes:
Personally I think that the best thing they could do would be to get rid of the stupid green bottle. Most of the time that I get Heineken these days, I find that it tastes skunky as hell. Maybe replacing the green bottle with a brown bottle will help this.
2012-10-10 09:36:22 AM
1 votes:
MaudlinMutantMollusk:see if Yuengling was available here just the other day so I could try it after I saw a bunch of Farkers raving on it

/alas, no Yuengling in California, it appears

don't worry too much about it. Yuengling is farking gross. it's too malty - too sweet with a really odd aftertaste. farking gross.
2012-10-09 10:49:10 PM
1 votes:

OrganLeroy: Wait a second. Heinie did create a different bottle design in the 60s -- something called the WOBO or world bottle, which was intended as building material:

http://archinect.com/news/article/65009/the-heineken-wobo-world-bottl e

If this bottle had caught on, once Farkers got past the taste of the Heinie, most of us would have built garden sheds and airplane hangars out of WOBOs by now.

//blames the 60s for shiatloads of bad ideas
//this one? not so bad


I came to post a pic of the 'brick bottle' but it looks like lostcat beat me to it. The WOBO was a wonderful idea. Imagine if all bottled goods came in containers meant to be repurposed as building materials. 100% energy-free recycling!
2012-10-09 09:31:34 PM
1 votes:
Beer snobs in this thread.

s10.postimage.org
2012-10-09 08:13:09 PM
1 votes:

PainInTheASP: gweilo8888: Maud Dib: gweilo8888: In before the kiddies complain about skunky flav... oh, wait. Never mind.

/come back when your tastebuds develop

Daf*ck you talkin' about?
Anyone who knows a flavor profile knows that shiate green beer is skunky.

Yeah, no. There are good beers that have elements of the flavor you label as being "skunky", and there are bad ones.

I drink and enjoy many, many types of beer, including quite a few of the best-rated brews on BeerAdvocate. I am also not a beer snob, and recognize not everybody wants to exist solely on microbrews and beers for which you have to hunt for weeks to track down a bottle. For a mass-market beverage, Heineken is a perfectly drinkable brew. Pull your head out of your own ass and you, too, might recognize that. The only people who whine about Heineken are beer snobs who whine about practically all mass-market beer, or people who can't stomach anything except watery, almost tasteless brews like Budweiser.

LOL.


To be fair, you don't have to be a beer snob to dislike Budweiser. It is barely beer--like I say, there's little to no actual flavor in it, it's just bubbly, mildly alcoholic water.

I am, however, aware that there's a perceived contradiction there, but if you knew me, you'd know I'm not afraid to try most any beer, and like a whole lot of them including a number of mass-market ones.

Unlike certain other people in here who like to tout their "training"--I'd be willing to bet they don't have a single globally, regionally, or even locally-recognized brew to their names, and have merely dabbled with home brewing--I am not a snob.
2012-10-09 05:29:37 PM
1 votes:
blog.beerloons.com
2012-10-09 05:28:29 PM
1 votes:

Prevailing Wind: [i-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com image 540x358] 


You. Are. Welcome.


I'm drinking one of those right now. Seriously.
2012-10-09 05:21:40 PM
1 votes:
Big back this and we will talk:
www.beeraday.net
2012-10-09 05:14:35 PM
1 votes:

Maud Dib: gweilo8888: In before the kiddies complain about skunky flav... oh, wait. Never mind.

/come back when your tastebuds develop

Daf*ck you talkin' about?
Anyone who knows a flavor profile knows that shiate green beer is skunky.


Yeah, no. There are good beers that have elements of the flavor you label as being "skunky", and there are bad ones.

I drink and enjoy many, many types of beer, including quite a few of the best-rated brews on BeerAdvocate. I am also not a beer snob, and recognize not everybody wants to exist solely on microbrews and beers for which you have to hunt for weeks to track down a bottle. For a mass-market beverage, Heineken is a perfectly drinkable brew. Pull your head out of your own ass and you, too, might recognize that. The only people who whine about Heineken are beer snobs who whine about practically all mass-market beer, or people who can't stomach anything except watery, almost tasteless brews like Budweiser.
2012-10-09 05:13:37 PM
1 votes:

MaudlinMutantMollusk: abhorrent1: MaudlinMutantMollusk: It'll still taste like ass

Angry Buddha: MaudlinMutantMollusk: It'll still taste like ass

Again for justice.

Says people that probably think Yuengling is a nectar of the gods.

I went looking to see if Yuengling was available here just the other day so I could try it after I saw a bunch of Farkers raving on it

/alas, no Yuengling in California, it appears


That's sad. Don't know about nectar of the gods but it is a damn sight better than Heineken or Bud, etc.

/it's my cheapie everyday beer
2012-10-09 05:12:47 PM
1 votes:

Kid Lester: I've had countless Heineken, Moosehead, Molson, Steinlager etc. beers that were refreshing and delicious right out of the bottle. Multiply those by 100 and that's the number of skunky beers I've had of those green bottled varieties. It is NOT supposed to taste like that. The shipping, handling and storage turn those beers skunky much more easily than brown bottled beer. I have a friend that drinks Heineken. I'll ask to smell hers when we're out and she orders one. If it's fresh, I'll order those, too. Most often though, it smells like skunk. F*ck that.


Depending on the setup I'll open one of the sealed cardboard boxes full of heineken six-packs versus getting one of the six-packs on display. They are shipped in those boxes and unexposed to light.
2012-10-09 05:03:26 PM
1 votes:

MikeSass: *laughs at people who say they don't like Heineken because it tastes skunky*

Why can't you losers simply admit that you just don't like beer? Fermented grain tastes like fermented grain. That pisswater Bud you drink is made with rice in order to take away all the beer flavor, so that patsies like you can still feel manly about yourselves when you say that you are a beer drinker. In reality, Bud is little more than a Zima without the citrus flavor added. It tastes nothing like beer, it hardly even looks like beer, and only qualifies as beer on a technicality.

Face it...you just don't like beer. Which is ok, I'm not saying you should, or that you have to. Just trying to make sure you know how stupid what you are saying is.


I like beer. Heineken is not good beer. It's okay, but it's priced like really it's really good. At mass market macrobrew prices I might buy it. At microbrew prices, no thanks.
2012-10-09 04:56:42 PM
1 votes:
Hey, we have a market problem.
Let's change the package.

Not sure if any of the execs over at Heinie in a jug went to business school, but two things are standard in the beverage industry.
Tastes change, and maybe if people think your product sucks, then maybe your product sucks.
If people won't by a dog turd, don't try to sell me on it being packaged poorly.

Someone is getting burned over there.
Paying people to think like this.

I may only qualify for loading dock work in their little fantasy word, but at least I'm not being over paid to put weasel piss in a green bottle and call it amber - osia. Fark that.
I have intergity.

*swigs a Bud*
2012-10-09 04:49:15 PM
1 votes:
I could care less what they do with the bottle. Stop the goofy commercials with the bad music.
2012-10-09 04:43:07 PM
1 votes:
But what if I prefer a short, stubby, ugly bottle?
www.businesspundit.com
/hot like the Jamaican summer
2012-10-09 04:38:50 PM
1 votes:

ChipNASA: I think a canned beer tastes like aluminum.


The can preserves the beer better, but yes, putting your lips on the aluminum rim will give you an aluminum taste. Have to pour into a glass.
2012-10-09 04:30:53 PM
1 votes:
That's not beer....THIS is BEER!!!!!

www.gunaxin.com

cdn.gunaxin.com

www.blatzbeer.com

www.artzberger.com
2012-10-09 04:30:07 PM
1 votes:

sn82: URAPNIS: I like Heineken.
Then again, I like Coors Light too.

It's like I don't even know you anymore.


Ha!
To be perfectly honest, I don't think I've ever had a beer that I didn't like.

I'm sorry that I'm such a disappointment :(
2012-10-09 04:09:20 PM
1 votes:
i used to drink. a lot. know what i found out?

you know that little empty gap at the top of a Heineken bottle where there is no beer up to the cap? you know what that is? a goddamn major farking headache the size of Texas just waiting to kick your ass the next morning when you wake up.

Heineken: because with a good marketing campaign, americans will believe anything from Europe is worth buying even if its utter pig swill.
2012-10-09 04:07:53 PM
1 votes:
this totally makes me want to drink that swill
2012-10-09 04:06:45 PM
1 votes:
I've only tried two beers where I've taken one sip, then dumped the rest. Heineken, and Miller High Life. Heineken tastes like garbage, High Life like piss.
2012-10-09 04:04:05 PM
1 votes:

MaudlinMutantMollusk: It'll still taste like ass


Again for justice.
2012-10-09 03:42:32 PM
1 votes:

xynix: beantowndog: PainInTheASP: Personally I think that the best thing they could do would be to get rid of the stupid green bottle. Most of the time that I get Heineken these days, I find that it tastes skunky as hell. Maybe replacing the green bottle with a brown bottle will help this.

I thought that was how it was supposed to taste.

Yeah I think that's how it supposed to taste. It tasted the same exact way in Amsterdam at the brewery. Of course I was high as shiat but that just made my taste buds more attentive.


People like that shiat?!?! LOL. Then they would probably be better off just buying a case of Miller longnecks and leaving them in the sun for a month or so. Cheaper, anyway.
2012-10-09 03:08:13 PM
1 votes:
Does the new neck break off with a satisfying crash and form into a razor sharp weapon at a moments notice? or will it render my foe unconscious as it harmlessly shatters in my ungloved hands
2012-10-09 02:53:12 PM
1 votes:
img.photobucket.com
2012-10-09 02:49:38 PM
1 votes:
What's the big deal, it's essentially the same. It's not like some 'Electric Blue Superman' change.
2012-10-09 02:47:21 PM
1 votes:
Will Lootie still be able to recognize the bottle?
 
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