If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Townhall)   In an effort to help future generations, here is a straightforward, entirely factual account of some of the most important moments of the Obama years   (townhall.com) divider line 120
    More: Interesting, obama, key dates, Jim Lehrer, shacks  
•       •       •

2455 clicks; posted to Politics » on 09 Oct 2012 at 10:47 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



120 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-10-09 11:07:21 AM

qorkfiend: Epoch_Zero: Jackson Herring: 11.) August 12, 2017: Barack Obama finally perfects his Time Machine. He uses it to travel back to 2008 in order to save Bapp Romney from Stericycle.
WTF Indeed: June 4, 2009: Barack Obama secretly drives unwed mothers to DC abortion clinics.
December 23, 2010: Barack Obama officially changes Christmas to "Fat, White Honky Day"

January 5th, 2010: Barack Obama mandates arugula be eaten in all public schools.
Obamuary 1st, 2010: Barack Obama renames February, Obamuary, decrees it national month of scary black men.

What about Baracktoberfest?


Oooh, that's better. Use that one.
 
2012-10-09 11:08:23 AM

buster_v: 5) NASA had its last manned space flight (July 21, 2011): America's "science President" moved America "forward" by cancelling our manned space program, which actually takes us all the way "backward" to 1960, the year before this country had its first crewed spaceflight. Hooray! We've gone backwards fifty years under Obama which takes us "forward"...or something.

Okay. The Right Wing Noise Machine® is all about science and space exploration now. Got it.


That is pretty par for the course. The crazy right wing seems to be all about projection, that's how Americans end up with "Democrats are bad for business and want big government..." and on a more personal level they decry "Bleeding heart liberals" while screaming for the censoring and/or killing of people who disagree with them. Claiming the moral high ground as theirs while cheating on their spouses/taxes/etc. A good rule of thumb seems to be if a crazy right winger accuses his opponent of it, you can be sure they do it.
 
2012-10-09 11:08:44 AM
He kept Sarah from getting into the White House. That was a very important moment for America (and the world)...
 
2012-10-09 11:09:05 AM
Article on conservative site in list form... *click* Yup, John Hawkins. Seriously, can this guy write out any thought requiring more than one paragraph?
 
2012-10-09 11:09:17 AM

Car_Ramrod: 1) Barack Obama Inaugurated (January 20, 2009): Oh, it was such a hopeful, glorious, unified moment. Cats and dogs, Fox and MSNBC, Republicans and Democrats -- we were all in it together and rooting Obama on towards victory..........which brings up some obvious questions like: How did Barack Obama squander so much goodwill and what did he do to make so many Americans hate him?

[imageshack.us image 562x437]


It seems like a growing conservative meme that they "were totally 100% supportive of Obama from day 1 and it's too bad he wouldn't reach across the isle to work with Republicans and that his agenda failed so badly."

Do they really think our memories are that short? There's farking video of Mitt Romney referring to Obama's "failed policies" 8 DAYS into his first term. Boehner held a meeting with congressional Republicans to plan out their obstructionist tactics before Obama was even inaugurated. WE KNOW WHAT YOU REALLY ARE GOP! QUIT LYING ABOUT THE STUFF YOU DID PROUDLY IN THE LAST 3 YEARS!
 
2012-10-09 11:09:59 AM
man, this guy really likes his lists. i don't think i've seen a townhall article written by him that ISN'T just an enumeration of "facts."
 
2012-10-09 11:10:13 AM
John Hawkins seems like sort of guy who desperately wants to make out with the president.
 
2012-10-09 11:10:37 AM
4) Osama Bin Laden was killed (May 2, 2011): In what undoubtedly was Barack Obama's greatest moment, a bunch of scared, wimpy SEALs came to him and said, "We've figured out where Osama Bin Laden is, but we think we shouldn't go get him because we're afraid!" That was undoubtedly how most other Americans would have felt as well because as Obama's team has told us constantly, he made a "gutsy call" to kill Osama. So obviously, those SEAL pansies had to be pushed into killing him, a wimp like John McCain wouldn't have done it, and hundreds of millions of Americans who were angry about 9/11 wouldn't have had cojones as big as President Mom-Jeans since he made such an incredibly "gutsy call."

You know who I hear constantly saying Obama took credit for killing OBL? Republicans

I think he should be louder and prouder regarding it.
 
2012-10-09 11:10:44 AM

Jackson Herring: Manly. Not many. Although John Hawkins does appear to be many, as opposed to one single person.


I think two slightly pudgy, kinda dim bloggers ran into each other to create one giant, retarded blogger, like Station from Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey.
 
2012-10-09 11:12:20 AM
1) Barack Obama Inaugurated (January 20, 2009): Oh, it was such a hopeful, glorious, unified moment. Cats and dogs, Fox and MSNBC, Republicans and Democrats -- we were all in it together and rooting Obama on towards victory..........which brings up some obvious questions like: How did Barack Obama squander so much goodwill and what did he do to make so many Americans hate him?
He's a black democrat.
 
2012-10-09 11:13:18 AM
I... I'm... I'm not sure where to even begin on that one. I mean, the guy starts out by saying that FOX News was supporting him after the inauguration and he can't imagine what he's done to spoil all that "good will". Nearly everything he said is factually wrong. Well, I'll give him that Obama wore mom jeans but then he goes on to say that Obama "created" a mom jeans movement? WTF? Seriously. WTF?
 
2012-10-09 11:13:37 AM

HMS_Blinkin: It seems like a growing conservative meme that they "were totally 100% supportive of Obama from day 1 and it's too bad he wouldn't reach across the isle to work with Republicans and that his agenda failed so badly."


0.tqn.com
 
2012-10-09 11:14:33 AM

vpb: So many of these right wing bloggers give the impression that they are social failures who love the GOP because it's the only social group where they have ever felt a sense of self-worth and belonging.


So it's like a polygamous sex cult, but in the worst possible way.
 
2012-10-09 11:14:50 AM

Jormungandr: buster_v: 5) NASA had its last manned space flight (July 21, 2011): America's "science President" moved America "forward" by cancelling our manned space program, which actually takes us all the way "backward" to 1960, the year before this country had its first crewed spaceflight. Hooray! We've gone backwards fifty years under Obama which takes us "forward"...or something.

Okay. The Right Wing Noise Machine® is all about science and space exploration now. Got it.

That is pretty par for the course. The crazy right wing seems to be all about projection, that's how Americans end up with "Democrats are bad for business and want big government..." and on a more personal level they decry "Bleeding heart liberals" while screaming for the censoring and/or killing of people who disagree with them. Claiming the moral high ground as theirs while cheating on their spouses/taxes/etc. A good rule of thumb seems to be if a crazy right winger accuses his opponent of it, you can be sure they do it.


Maybe if you weren't so racist we'd have Romney in the white house!!
 
2012-10-09 11:15:00 AM

dinch: I... I'm... I'm not sure where to even begin on that one. I mean, the guy starts out by saying that FOX News was supporting him after the inauguration and he can't imagine what he's done to spoil all that "good will". Nearly everything he said is factually wrong. Well, I'll give him that Obama wore mom jeans but then he goes on to say that Obama "created" a mom jeans movement? WTF? Seriously. WTF?


Your first Jabba Hawkins article, eh? This is his entire schtick.
 
2012-10-09 11:15:18 AM
Just looking at this dude combined with the crazy shiat he writes, he is either

A)a sad, lonely person who is probably a self hating homosexual.

B)a crazy farker using the ad revenue from his crazy to fund a blow and hooker lifestyle that will leave him dead in 2 years.
 
2012-10-09 11:15:37 AM
3) Obamacare passes (March 21, 2010): In one fell swoop, Barack Obama managed to cripple American healthcare, put the medical insurance industry on suicide watch,

Picture of what the medical industry on suicide watch might look like:

i236.photobucket.com
 
2012-10-09 11:15:58 AM

FlashHarry: [i48.tinypic.com image 699x466]

townhall tuesday?


You gotta problem potato with that?

i865.photobucket.com
 
2012-10-09 11:16:02 AM
5) NASA had its last manned space flight (July 21, 2011): America's "science President" moved America "forward" by cancelling our manned space program, which actually takes us all the way "backward" to 1960, the year before this country had its first crewed spaceflight. Hooray! We've gone backwards fifty years under Obama which takes us "forward"...or something.

Republicans support scientific endeavors the same way a southern baptist supports same sex marriage.
 
2012-10-09 11:16:06 AM

Car_Ramrod: Jackson Herring: Manly. Not many. Although John Hawkins does appear to be many, as opposed to one single person.

I think two slightly pudgy, kinda dim bloggers ran into each other to create one giant, retarded blogger, like Station from Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey.


It's like when far in the future the Andromeda galaxy collides with our own. Except the matter thrown off of this specific collision didn't become it's own separate galaxy, but eventually coalesced to become that fat girl who wrote B on herself.
 
2012-10-09 11:17:25 AM

Doctor Funkenstein: 1) Barack Obama Inaugurated (January 20, 2009): Oh, it was such a hopeful, glorious, unified moment. Cats and dogs, Fox and MSNBC, Republicans and Democrats -- we were all in it together and rooting Obama on towards victory..........which brings up some obvious questions like: How did Barack Obama squander so much goodwill and what did he do to make so many Americans hate him?


In the immortal words of John Stewart on this subject matter: "Bull. farking. shiat."
 
2012-10-09 11:18:08 AM
I'm on my 6th Townhall account because apparently posting "Morbidly Obese Virgin" on every John Hawkins article is grounds for a ban.

Bunch of Nazis!
 
2012-10-09 11:18:24 AM
6) America loses its AAA credit rating (August 5, 2011): For the first time since 1917, America had its credit rating downgraded from AAA by Standard & Poor's. Despite Barack Obama's call telling S&P that Tea Partiers must have spent all those trillions of dollars while he was out of the White House golfing and his promise that "We'll pay it all back when our next paycheck comes in, we swear", S&P refused to take Obama's record-breaking deficit numbers off the books.

Obstructionist republicans had absolutely nothing to do with this. Nosirree.
 
2012-10-09 11:20:58 AM

Fluorescent Testicle: dinch: I... I'm... I'm not sure where to even begin on that one. I mean, the guy starts out by saying that FOX News was supporting him after the inauguration and he can't imagine what he's done to spoil all that "good will". Nearly everything he said is factually wrong. Well, I'll give him that Obama wore mom jeans but then he goes on to say that Obama "created" a mom jeans movement? WTF? Seriously. WTF?

Your first Jabba Hawkins article, eh? This is his entire schtick.


I guess it's the first one I've actually read. I just have a hard time belling that anybody would actually believe this stuff though. Of course, I also read a blog talking about the last debate where the guy was going on and on about how Obama was obviously using coke again and/or probably even has AIDS and Michelle is just his beard cause he likes to sleep with men. He seemed to really believe it or at least believe that other people would believe it... and then we have people like Brick House et al here... I guess I'm just boggled that there are people out there who are so intellectually incurious and willfully stupid that they would buy into this tripe. It's really sad.
 
2012-10-09 11:21:45 AM

Krymson Tyde: 6) America loses its AAA credit rating (August 5, 2011): For the first time since 1917, America had its credit rating downgraded from AAA by Standard & Poor's. Despite Barack Obama's call telling S&P that Tea Partiers must have spent all those trillions of dollars while he was out of the White House golfing and his promise that "We'll pay it all back when our next paycheck comes in, we swear", S&P refused to take Obama's record-breaking deficit numbers off the books.

Obstructionist republicans had absolutely nothing to do with this. Nosirree.


If I remember correctly, Republican political intransigence was specifically called out in S&P's report on the downgrade.
 
2012-10-09 11:24:19 AM

blackminded: Republican political intransigence was specifically called out in S&P's report on the downgrade.


Yes, yes it was.
 
2012-10-09 11:25:03 AM
12) June 13, 2012 - Obama floods the Van Statten Museum with cement, forever denying America the opportunity to make technological advances using the equipment displayed therein (particularly anything which could have been discovered by studying the Metaltron)
 
2012-10-09 11:25:22 AM
So his list didn't even make it to potato, huh? Tops out at 10? That's not the kind of effort I've come to expect from the lying sacks of failure that make up the American right.
 
2012-10-09 11:26:47 AM

quatchi: Wow, this guy sucks.

Is there a reason every single one of this guy's farticle's gets insta-greened?

Does it involve an unreleased picture of a mod and a goat in sexual congress?

Just asking questions.


He's the Wampler of the Politics tab.
 
2012-10-09 11:30:00 AM

SuperT: Just looking at this dude combined with the crazy shiat he writes, he is either


i48.tinypic.com
 
2012-10-09 11:30:33 AM
14) For the crowning achievement of his 4-year tyrannical dictatorship, Obama finally finds where all the white women at.
 
2012-10-09 11:32:19 AM

deadcrickets: Jormungandr: buster_v: 5) NASA had its last manned space flight (July 21, 2011): America's "science President" moved America "forward" by cancelling our manned space program, which actually takes us all the way "backward" to 1960, the year before this country had its first crewed spaceflight. Hooray! We've gone backwards fifty years under Obama which takes us "forward"...or something.

Okay. The Right Wing Noise Machine® is all about science and space exploration now. Got it.

That is pretty par for the course. The crazy right wing seems to be all about projection, that's how Americans end up with "Democrats are bad for business and want big government..." and on a more personal level they decry "Bleeding heart liberals" while screaming for the censoring and/or killing of people who disagree with them. Claiming the moral high ground as theirs while cheating on their spouses/taxes/etc. A good rule of thumb seems to be if a crazy right winger accuses his opponent of it, you can be sure they do it.

Maybe if you weren't so racist we'd have Romney in the white house!!


I think you're kidding, but I just know that somewhere one of said crazy right wingers is rubbing his potato-like face and saying... "Yeah, the Dims are racist for voting for a black man!"
 
2012-10-09 11:34:35 AM

RastyMcNasty: I'm on my 6th Townhall account because apparently posting "Morbidly Obese Virgin" on every John Hawkins article is grounds for a ban. Bunch of Nazis!


Well, everybody knows that Republicans despise facts.
 
2012-10-09 11:34:36 AM
15.) October 25, 2012: Barack Obama unleashes his "October Surprise", lets the dogs out
 
2012-10-09 11:34:45 AM
Wow. I've never clicked on a Town Hall link before.
Didn't know what it was or cared, but this:

a bunch of scared, wimpy SEALs came to him and said, "We've figured out where Osama Bin Laden is, but we think we shouldn't go get him because we're afraid!"

Here's hoping he gets a knock on the door around 3am by some wimps .
And by knock, I mean forced entry and by wimps I mean Seals with a grudge.
 
2012-10-09 11:36:47 AM

quatchi: Wow, this guy sucks.

Is there a reason every single one of this guy's farticle's gets insta-greened?

Does it involve an unreleased picture of a mod and a goat in sexual congress?

Just asking questions.


My money is that he is a mod. Someone has to green all those American Stinker links.
 
2012-10-09 11:40:14 AM
All joking aside for a moment, why is it that so many fatasses are hardcore right-wingers? What's the connection?
 
2012-10-09 11:42:31 AM
Can we get a "DUMB" button in addition to "SMART" & "FUNNY" ??????
 
2012-10-09 11:45:29 AM

Fluorescent Testicle: All joking aside for a moment, why is it that so many fatasses are hardcore right-wingers? What's the connection?


Both are fans of unrestrained consumption.
 
2012-10-09 11:46:04 AM
1) Barack Obama Inaugurated (January 20, 2009): Oh, it was such a hopeful, glorious, unified moment. Cats and dogs, Fox and MSNBC, Republicans and Democrats -- we were all in it together and rooting Obama on towards victory..........which brings up some obvious questions like: How did Barack Obama squander so much goodwill and what did he do to make so many Americans hate him?

That's cute... The thing is, I seem to remember Fox "asking" whether the "honeymoon" was over on day 2, Republican demonization of him within days including piling on to his proposal to close Guantanamo, and 0 Republican votes for the stimulus plan less than three months later. Obama had a mandate but Republicans were against him and trying to make him fail from the very beginning.
 
2012-10-09 11:48:11 AM

Zombie DJ: Wow. I've never clicked on a Town Hall link before.
Didn't know what it was or cared, but this:

a bunch of scared, wimpy SEALs came to him and said, "We've figured out where Osama Bin Laden is, but we think we shouldn't go get him because we're afraid!"

Here's hoping he gets a knock on the door around 3am by some wimps .
And by knock, I mean forced entry and by wimps I mean Seals with a grudge.


His failure at the use of sarcasm here outshines any other ignorant flatulence from the rest of his blog post (I can't bring myself to call it an article)... Apparently Right Wingers assume that a couple of SEALS that happen to find out the location of an enemy can just shoot them on sight (assuming it was the SEALS that found him, and not other intelligence that eventually led to the SEALS being given the mission), rather than adhere to a chain of command.
Even if the U.S. had known of bin Laden's location for weeks, or whatever he claims, someone still has to give the order, and out of military respect, the Commander and Chief would be deferred to (Pretty sure any serious good chance at taking down Hitler would have had even the U.S. president looking to Churchill for a nod).
 
2012-10-09 11:50:40 AM

FlashHarry: [i48.tinypic.com image 699x466]

townhall tuesday?


Not to be confused with

Malkin Monday
Wingnut Wednesday
American Thinker Thursday
Freeper Friday
Weekly Standard Saturday
Sovreign Citizen Sunday
 
2012-10-09 11:55:39 AM
I really wish Obama wearing mom jeans was more of a scandal that right wingers shouted about. That would be hilarious.
 
2012-10-09 11:56:51 AM

Zerochance: I think...


No.
 
2012-10-09 12:02:13 PM
They also forgot:

November 6, 2012: Obama wins second term.
 
2012-10-09 12:04:37 PM

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: John Hawkins seems like sort of guy who desperately wants to make out with the president.


He smells like cheese and Dial. He doesn't have room to be that fussy.
 
2012-10-09 12:05:20 PM

Satanic_Hamster: I wonder if it ever bothers someone like that how much they have to lie.


This butterball will be in a motorized chair by the time he's Obama's age, he can't even face the truth about himself. The perceived freedom to let rip for a twisted notion of the greater good is a primary factor driving the marginals. It's their empowerment and not a historically unique event.
 
2012-10-09 12:06:41 PM

Zombie DJ:
"a bunch of scared, wimpy SEALs came to him and said, "We've figured out where Osama Bin Laden is, but we think we shouldn't go get him because we're afraid!"

Here's hoping he gets a knock on the door around 3am by some wimps .
And by knock, I mean forced entry and by wimps I mean Seals with a grudge.


To be fair to this pathetic blogger, that quote is not what he thinks but rather what he imagines is Obama's delusional account of the mission. He is trying to argue that anyone would have made the call to "Go ahead" with the mission. He then cites McCain implying that McCain of course would have also done the same thing. Although John McCain himself said explicitly that he would not have done that.
 
2012-10-09 12:08:02 PM

BSABSVR: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: John Hawkins seems like sort of guy who desperately wants to make out with the president.

He smells like cheese and Dial. He doesn't have room to be that fussy.


Wait one gosh-darned minute! What's wrong with Dial soap? It's gets you clean just fine, and that's all you need out of a soap.
 
2012-10-09 12:09:32 PM

Epoch_Zero: Fluorescent Testicle: All joking aside for a moment, why is it that so many fatasses are hardcore right-wingers? What's the connection?

Both are fans of unrestrained consumption.


Zing!
 
Displayed 50 of 120 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report