FARK.com: (7371600) CNN decides to try its hand at trolling, announces that the fastest growing religion is Atheism

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		CNN decides to try its hand at trolling, announces that the fastest growing religion is Atheism (religion.blogs.cnn.com)		369
		More: Interesting, demographic trends, Pew Research Center, religions and spiritual traditions, Secular Student Alliance

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Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo		2012-10-09 11:02:53 AM

We should really create our own religion here on Fark. Think of the benefits brought on by the tax exempt status!

my_cats_breath_smells_like_cat_food		2012-10-09 11:03:09 AM

Reminds me of the dyslexic agnostic insomniac.

/He wandered around at night wondering if there really was a dog...

busy chillin'		2012-10-09 11:04:16 AM

my_cats_breath_smells_like_cat_food: Reminds me of the dyslexic agnostic insomniac.

/He wandered around at night wondering if there really was a dog...

That's so funny the last time I heard that, I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur.

Martian_Astronomer		2012-10-09 11:04:24 AM

In announcing the survey's findings at the Religion Newswriters Association conference in Bethesda, Maryland, Green said the growing political power of the unaffiliated within the Democratic Party could become similar to the power the Religious Right acquired in the GOP in the 1980s.

First, given the rhetoric that the Democrats have been throwing out lately, this seems tremendously unlikely. Second, given what I know about the Pew forum, this statement was intended to smear the Democrats and induce self-righteous hand-wringing and pearl-clutching in evangelicals.

Easy prediction: In the next couple of weeks, look for another wave of histrionic opinion pieces by Christians bemoaning how the church has "failed" young people; and by "the church," they mean all those other churches that are "doing it wrong," not their church, which is, of course, right about everything.

KrispyKritter		2012-10-09 11:04:32 AM

vpb: Pocket Ninja: Actually, they said that the fastest growing group is the religiously "unaffiliated," over half of whom still attend church and/or consider themselves "spiritual" and would certainly not label themselves as atheists. Although since there is no group easier to troll than online atheists, your headline will work just fine, subby.

I don't know. Many people who attend church only go to keep their friends and family happy.

there are those who attend services to keep friends & family happy. there are those who attend only for their own purposes, as in to promote themselves and their business to others. and there are a few who show up regularly that are there to give praise & worship to God as they have their weary vessel refilled and renewed.

sodomizer		2012-10-09 11:05:19 AM

Yakk: proteon: Unless you've never been to Reddit, I'm not sure this is trolling.

I wish Reddit would discover the religion of readable threads.

It's gonna have to discover quality control of its user base first. I used to think Slashdot had some stupid posters, and then I discovered Reddit, which is like the part of the internet that wears a dunce hat.

Weaver95		2012-10-09 11:05:26 AM

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: We should really create our own religion here on Fark. Think of the benefits brought on by the tax exempt status!

2.bp.blogspot.com

All hail the omnissiah!

The Martian Manhandler		2012-10-09 11:05:32 AM

SquiggsIN		2012-10-09 11:05:49 AM

I hope every day to wake up to a world that has abandoned the crutch of religion. We, as a species, will never progress to anywhere near our potential until we stop using religion to answer our questions.

Religious people can be wonderful people but, we all know that not all are. More people have been killed in the name of a deity than for any other reason in history.

Nemo's Brother		2012-10-09 11:08:22 AM

Weaver95: The fastest growing "religious" group in America is made up of people with no religion at all, according to a Pew survey showing that one in five Americans is not affiliated with any religion.

well gee, I wonder why that might be the case...? ya think it has something to do with all the sex and drug scandals among 'mainstream' religions? or maybe that the megachurches are offensive right down to the genetic level...?

Or when sheer numbers. If I start a church that has 3 members in it this year and it has 9 members in 2013, my growth rate far exceeds any other mainstream religion.

Spanky_McFarksalot		2012-10-09 11:08:41 AM

Bhruic: Actually, I know of few - if any - atheists who would say that.

really? because I see it claimed all the time one of these studies come out.

Coder		2012-10-09 11:09:43 AM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: Coder: /Agnosticism is for people who don't understand probability

No, it's for people who take it too literally.

True enough. I was thinking of agnostics as the on-the-fence 50/50 crowd. Those of us who know that God and Russel's Tea Pot can't be 'disproved' but still understand how they're made up, are atheists. 100% statistical guarantee not required.

/unlike the faithful, who suddenly require the highest standard of proof mathematically possible.

Yakk		2012-10-09 11:09:46 AM

Weaver95: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: We should really create our own religion here on Fark. Think of the benefits brought on by the tax exempt status!

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 400x407]

All hail the omnissiah!

I say we worship Tim Tebow and make Skip Bayless the Pope.

trappedspirit		2012-10-09 11:10:17 AM

The fastest growing "religious" group in America is made up of people with no religion at all,...

Next up, the fastest growing "athletic" group in America is made up of no athletes

iheartscotch		2012-10-09 11:10:22 AM

Skarekrough: iheartscotch: I feel sorry for atheists; they don't get to use holy days as an excuse to get off of work. The benefit of being well informed seems somewhat less beside 10 extra days off a year.

/ *pokes the bear*

We get our kicks in... sleeping in on Sunday.....not looking like some retard with dirt on our foreheads on some random Wednesday in the Winter.

*pokes back*

Technically; all we have to do on Sunday is keep the sabbath holy; whatever that means. We only have to go to church 7 times a year. It's ashes; and it floats around because the vernal equinox floats around.

Besides; when I die, I get to hang out with jebus; jebus throws the best parties.

Not being serious; I don't know what happens after someone dies; I'd like to think that it all ment something and there is a justice to the universe; but, in all likely means nothing and justice doesn't exist.

/ still getting out of work though

deadcrickets		2012-10-09 11:10:58 AM

Least it wasn't Mormons

sodomizer		2012-10-09 11:12:37 AM

Pitabred: sodomizer: I enjoy the safety of agnosticism. I'm not telling religious people or atheists that they're wrong or right. Just that me, I don't know or don't care to take a position.

"I don't care what you think, and I'm going to make sure you know it" FTFY

Not at all, since the topic doesn't come up unless someone asks.

trappedspirit		2012-10-09 11:13:11 AM

WTF Indeed: Making Online atheists angry is like shooting fish in a barrel.

I thought mythbusters had some issue with this.

MadUncleEoin		2012-10-09 11:13:36 AM

vpb: Many people who attend church only go to keep their friends and family happy.

My mother wants me to bring myself, wife and 5 year old son to "bring a friend to church" next week. My wife refuses to go, and I'm more a-theist than she is. But I'm still trying to figure out how to get out of it without upsetting my mother.

Girion47		2012-10-09 11:14:23 AM

JackieRabbit: Is the Obvious tag off on a religious sabbatical? The trend toward secularization in America is now long-standing. In two generations, people with religious affiliations will be a minority.

Not if the republicans get their way. Their push towards theocratic laws is frightening, and definitely driving the younger generation further away.

Cubicle Jockey		2012-10-09 11:16:38 AM

iheartscotch: The benefit of being well informed seems somewhat less beside 10 extra days off a year.

Bank Holidays, 2011
---------------------------
Monday, January 17 - Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr.
Monday, February 21 - Washington's Birthday
Monday, May 30 - Memorial Day
Monday, July 4 - Independence Day
Monday, September 5 - Labor Day
Monday, October 10 - Columbus Day
Friday, November 11 - Veterans Day
Thursday, November 24 - Thanksgiving Day
Monday, December 26 - Christmas Day

Only Christmas is specifically religious.
Thanksgiving is kinda sorta spiritual, but it's not specific to any relgiion.
The other eight are all secular.

Slaves2Darkness		2012-10-09 11:18:22 AM

WTF Indeed: Making Online atheists angry is like shooting fish in a barrel. Trolling them is not even worthy of the word "trolling".

Making Online ~~atheists~~ Christians angry is like shooting fish in a barrel. Trolling them is not even worthy of the word "trolling".

Making Online ~~atheists~~ Republicans angry is like shooting fish in a barrel. Trolling them is not even worthy of the word "trolling".

Making Online ~~atheists~~ mommies angry is like shooting fish in a barrel. Trolling them is not even worthy of the word "trolling".

Making Online ~~atheists~~ Farkers angry is like shooting fish in a barrel. Trolling them is not even worthy of the word "trolling".

Yep, your statement works for those groups to, face being outraged on line is past time for most of these assholes.

theolinc		2012-10-09 11:18:24 AM

if athiesm is a religion then unemployed is a career

sn82		2012-10-09 11:18:37 AM

HotWingConspiracy: It's like any other business, people are just getting bored with the product.

A slick marketing campaign might help. Offer some new incentives, maybe roll back restrictions.

I would think doing the same routine for a years time is boring. Every Sunday morning go to church... and for what? To have a person give you their opinions and philosophies no matter how f*cked up they are. Even then, after you go to church you go back to your sinner ways. Pfffttt!!!

The product doesn't work or sell.

Slaves2Darkness		2012-10-09 11:19:38 AM

Buttknuckle: I have come to realize something in the past couple years...

Atheists who look down upon others for their religious beliefs are arrogant. You cannot win an argument with an Atheist, because it is about logic. Religion is about BELIEF. There is so much we don't know out there and to assume that we as humans are "it" is arrogant as hell, IMHO. But it really bothers me when Atheists look down on those who get happiness and serenity in their lives with religion. Of course, this is contingent on the fact that they are not religious nutjobs trying to convert everyone in their path.

Well at least you found a group to feel superior to. You really need to talk to someone about that inferiority complex though.

Mambo Bananapatch		2012-10-09 11:19:43 AM

tgambitg: Atheism = not a religion.

Antitheism (which a majority of your vocal internet atheists subscribe to, whether they know it or not) = Most definitely a religion.

If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, looks like a duck, it's a duck.

Of course, if you don't know what a duck is or what it walks, talks, or looks like, identifying it with smug certainty as a duck just makes you look like an idiot.

had98c		2012-10-09 11:19:51 AM

sn82: HotWingConspiracy: It's like any other business, people are just getting bored with the product.

A slick marketing campaign might help. Offer some new incentives, maybe roll back restrictions.

I would think doing the same routine for a years time is boring. Every Sunday morning go to church... and for what? To have a person give you their opinions and philosophies no matter how f*cked up they are. Even then, after you go to church you go back to your sinner ways. Pfffttt!!!

The product doesn't work or sell.

Not really much different than hanging out on Fark reading people's opinions and philosophies no matter how screwy they are.

Slaves2Darkness		2012-10-09 11:21:22 AM

the_chief: Atheism is just another atheism.

You know I think that quote would have worked better if you had gone with Religion is just another atheism., because really religious folk are atheist in regards to other gods.

miscreant		2012-10-09 11:21:38 AM

I haven't seen a detailed explanation of theist vs. atheist and gnostic vs. agnostic yet and how they differ yet in this thread. Fark, I am disappoint.

CrappityCrap		2012-10-09 11:21:39 AM

Atheism may as well be a religion. Sure acts like one. They're utterly convinced they're right and everyone else is wrong. They do whatever they can to get more people to think just like them, and when you challenge their beliefs the farktardism commences.

SquiggsIN		2012-10-09 11:22:03 AM

Cubicle Jockey: iheartscotch: The benefit of being well informed seems somewhat less beside 10 extra days off a year.

Bank Holidays, 2011
---------------------------
Monday, January 17 - Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr.
Monday, February 21 - Washington's Birthday
Monday, May 30 - Memorial Day
Monday, July 4 - Independence Day
Monday, September 5 - Labor Day
Monday, October 10 - Columbus Day
Friday, November 11 - Veterans Day
Thursday, November 24 - Thanksgiving Day
Monday, December 26 - Christmas Day

Only Christmas is specifically religious.
Thanksgiving is kinda sorta spiritual, but it's not specific to any relgiion.
The other eight are all secular.

and christ mass has no business being a federally-recognized holiday. that goes completely against our establishment of religion clause.

Girion47		2012-10-09 11:22:41 AM

CrappityCrap: Atheism may as well be a religion. Sure acts like one. They're utterly convinced they're right and everyone else is wrong. They do whatever they can to get more people to think just like them, and when you challenge their beliefs the farktardism commences.

Since when is logic, "farktardism"?

Martian_Astronomer		2012-10-09 11:22:58 AM

HotWingConspiracy: It's like any other business, people are just getting bored with the product.

A slick marketing campaign might help. Offer some new incentives, maybe roll back restrictions.

You've been living in a cave for the last 15 years if you think that Christianity hasn't tried to embrace "slick marketing campaigns." Protip: Wearing hipster glasses and talking about how "experiential" your Christianity is doesn't magically make you "relevant."

SquiggsIN		2012-10-09 11:23:45 AM

Slaves2Darkness: the_chief: Atheism is just another atheism.

You know I think that quote would have worked better if you had gone with Religion is just another atheism., because really religious folk are atheist in regards to other gods.

.. something along the line of : based on the number of deities humanity has created, the monotheistic faithful are more atheistic than any other religious group from history.

busy chillin'		2012-10-09 11:23:53 AM

SquiggsIN:
and christ mass has no business being a federally-recognized holiday. that goes completely against our establishment of religion clause.

whoa whoa whoa...let's not get crazy here. I like having the day off. We need more I say. Yom Kippur would be cool.

Skarekrough		2012-10-09 11:24:09 AM

As an athiest I relish the times I get to hang out with my more religious friends. Their religions are filled with great lush tales of history and morals and are just great to hear about. They have their communities and groups and they do their thing and I applaud them for it. I urge them to be involved and to get out of it what it is that they feel is of the most rewarding.

They do their thing and I do mine. Sometimes I buy the beer sometimes they do. It all works out.

Coder		2012-10-09 11:24:56 AM

Why is it that we care more about debating if atheism fits the definition of religion then about whether or not god actually exists or if faith makes any sense? Talk about missing the point.

SquiggsIN		2012-10-09 11:25:25 AM

On atheism, Sagan commented in 1981:

"An atheist is someone who is certain that God does not exist, someone who has compelling evidence against the existence of God. I know of no such compelling evidence. Because God can be relegated to remote times and places and to ultimate causes, we would have to know a great deal more about the universe than we do now to be sure that no such God exists. To be certain of the existence of God and to be certain of the nonexistence of God seem to me to be the confident extremes in a subject so riddled with doubt and uncertainty as to inspire very little confidence indeed".

Thanks wikipAedia.

imontheinternet		2012-10-09 11:27:12 AM

miscreant: I haven't seen a detailed explanation of theist vs. atheist and gnostic vs. agnostic yet and how they differ yet in this thread. Fark, I am disappoint.

Christianity isn't monotheistic at all. It's a pantheistic religion that singles out one deity and proscribes the worship of others.

/scratch that one off

ShamWowofDamocles		2012-10-09 11:27:59 AM

Inflatable Rhetoric		2012-10-09 11:28:09 AM

SquiggsIN: On atheism, Sagan commented in 1981:

"An atheist is someone who is certain that God does not exist, someone who has compelling evidence against the existence of God. I know of no such compelling evidence. Because God can be relegated to remote times and places and to ultimate causes, we would have to know a great deal more about the universe than we do now to be sure that no such God exists. To be certain of the existence of God and to be certain of the nonexistence of God seem to me to be the confident extremes in a subject so riddled with doubt and uncertainty as to inspire very little confidence indeed".

The same is true for the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and Santa.

fruitloop		2012-10-09 11:28:59 AM

Yakk: Weaver95: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: We should really create our own religion here on Fark. Think of the benefits brought on by the tax exempt status!

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 400x407]

All hail the omnissiah!

I say we worship Tim Tebow and make Skip Bayless the Pope.

i171.photobucket.com

/not mine

miscreant		2012-10-09 11:29:18 AM

CrappityCrap: Atheism may as well be a religion. Sure acts like one. They're utterly convinced they're right and everyone else is wrong. They do whatever they can to get more people to think just like them, and when you challenge their beliefs the farktardism commences.

I always find this type of argument so comical. Everyone with any sort of world view thinks they're right. If you didn't, then you would change your world view until you did.

tgambitg		2012-10-09 11:29:29 AM

Mambo Bananapatch: tgambitg: Atheism = not a religion.

Antitheism (which a majority of your vocal internet atheists subscribe to, whether they know it or not) = Most definitely a religion.

If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, looks like a duck, it's a duck.

Of course, if you don't know what a duck is or what it walks, talks, or looks like, identifying it with smug certainty as a duck just makes you look like an idiot.

Maybe I should clarify this since you apparently took it as an attack and lashed out....

If it walks (strong belief that God does not exist) like a duck, talks (trying to convert others to the viewpoint) like a duck, looks ('holy books', like Dawkins' books) like a duck, it's a duck (religion).

Note I'm talking about ANTITHEISTS, not Atheists. You're run of the mill Atheist isn't going to be doing all that. Your vocal Internet Atheist? Fits the mold of Anitheist perfectly.

had98c		2012-10-09 11:29:56 AM

Inflatable Rhetoric: SquiggsIN: On atheism, Sagan commented in 1981:

"An atheist is someone who is certain that God does not exist, someone who has compelling evidence against the existence of God. I know of no such compelling evidence. Because God can be relegated to remote times and places and to ultimate causes, we would have to know a great deal more about the universe than we do now to be sure that no such God exists. To be certain of the existence of God and to be certain of the nonexistence of God seem to me to be the confident extremes in a subject so riddled with doubt and uncertainty as to inspire very little confidence indeed".

The same is true for the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and Santa.

Hey, at least we can see the Easter Bunny and Santa. So we know they exist. They're at the mall every spring and every December, respectively. Go look for yourself.

Leeds		2012-10-09 11:30:10 AM

This is great news- For America.

Think of it- At these growth rates, we'll have the numbers to take over an entire party in the next 30 or so years.

That may seem like playing the long game, but it's worth it. What's more important than the struggle we're facing as we rebel against the cult members strangling our country?

Leeds		2012-10-09 11:32:15 AM

miscreant: CrappityCrap: Atheism may as well be a religion. Sure acts like one. They're utterly convinced they're right and everyone else is wrong. They do whatever they can to get more people to think just like them, and when you challenge their beliefs the farktardism commences.

I always find this type of argument so comical. Everyone with any sort of world view thinks they're right. If you didn't, then you would change your world view until you did.

You're right of course. But there is one group you fail to mention- the people who have never questioned their own beliefs at all.

By definition those folks are religious people and the more we interact with them and get them to explore their own beliefs, the fewer religious people there will be.

Inflatable Rhetoric		2012-10-09 11:33:07 AM

Coder: Why is it that we care more about debating if atheism fits the definition of religion then about whether or not god actually exists or if faith makes any sense? Talk about missing the point.

The point is pointless. There's no reason to believe there's a god, emphasis on REASON.

Deep Contact		2012-10-09 11:33:22 AM

I'm beyond atheism.

Ishkur		2012-10-09 11:33:40 AM

People may be falling out with religion, and they may even claim that they are atheists, but that still doesn't stop them from believing in complete nonsense.

The human predilection for being a special and unique property of the the Universe is as strong as ever. It's just been shifted from organized religion to spirituality -- everything from energy auras and chakras to ley lines and feng shui, ESP and psychics, homeopathy, paranormal existences, belief in ghosts/vampires/werewolves/angels, reincarnation, tai chi/yoga/meditation/mindfulness/Buddhism, astrology, miracles/premonition/prophecy, indigo children, the Mayan calendar, the coming Age of Aquarius and anything that reeks of "New Age" (which includes everything from the Celestine Prophecy to What the Bleep Do We Know).

Sure, religion is declining. But supernaturalism is as strong as ever. I blame education.

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