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(TMZ)   Tim Tebow just realized that tonight's Monday Night Football game is the 666th Monday Night game in history and totally goes all Jesusy   (tmz.com) divider line 111
    More: Dumbass, Tim Tebow, NFL Matchup, love of God, Texans  
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6448 clicks; posted to Sports » on 08 Oct 2012 at 8:26 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-10-08 04:12:36 PM
Jesus Christ....
 
2012-10-08 04:16:52 PM
Throwing a ball really doesn't do anything for God.
 
2012-10-08 04:20:51 PM
Great moments in stupidstitions
 
2012-10-08 04:22:50 PM
Future Republican candidate for President of the United States.

I almost guarantee it.
 
2012-10-08 04:22:52 PM
Don't worry Timmy, Breesus and his apostles will surely come to your aid:

www.chicitysports.com
 
2012-10-08 04:24:08 PM
wait...

it's the 666th MNF
the Jets are playing the Texans
The Texans logo has horns
you know who else has horn.

www-static.weddingbee.com
 
2012-10-08 04:27:19 PM
This is why we Christians can't have nice things. Seriously.
 
2012-10-08 04:30:29 PM
Sounds like he's trying to manage expectations for when the Jets get steamrolled by the undefeated Houston Texans tonight.

Huh. "Undefeated Houston Texans." Three words I never expected to use consecutively in a sentence.
 
2012-10-08 04:32:07 PM
"Looking forward to giving God all the glory in tonight's 666th Monday Night Football game. Romans 8:37-39."

Okay? This is hardly the worst or dumbest tweet that has ever been tw..ote? Twitted? Twat?

Anyway, meh.
 
2012-10-08 04:32:39 PM
What the f* is wrong this guy? Why does he get so much attention?
 
2012-10-08 04:37:18 PM

Relatively Obscure: "Looking forward to giving God all the glory in tonight's 666th Monday Night Football game. Romans 8:37-39."

Okay? This is hardly the worst or dumbest tweet that has ever been tw..ote? Twitted? Twat?

Anyway, meh.


See, this is where a WWE cross-over event could have been perfect.

Right when Tebow is about to be called into the game due to SanchFAIL, cut the lights, then hit the Undertaker's music.

Lights come up, and Taker is standing right behind Timmy. Timmy runs the other way, only to find Kane in his way. they then double chokeslam him through the Gatorade table, cut a promo about next year's Wrestlemania, and lave.

/I can dream, right?
 
2012-10-08 04:39:56 PM

Nadie_AZ: What the f* is wrong this guy? Why does he get so much attention?


I don't think there is anything "wrong" with him, necessarily, apart from his QB skills at the NFL level. He seems to be a good kid, a hard worker, always quick to accept blame for failures and share credit for successes, never has an ill word to say about anyone, positive attitude. Sports media types seem to obsess about him for some reason. Sure, he lays the Jesus stuff on really thick, but so did Danny Wuerffel, and he was a better pro QB. (Also, Wuerffel has done some marvelous charity work in New Orleans over the years, particularly in the Ninth Ward, so I can't say anything bad about that man, either.)
 
2012-10-08 04:44:24 PM

Nabb1: Nadie_AZ: What the f* is wrong this guy? Why does he get so much attention?

I don't think there is anything "wrong" with him, necessarily, apart from his QB skills at the NFL level. He seems to be a good kid, a hard worker, always quick to accept blame for failures and share credit for successes, never has an ill word to say about anyone, positive attitude. Sports media types seem to obsess about him for some reason. Sure, he lays the Jesus stuff on really thick, but so did Danny Wuerffel, and he was a better pro QB. (Also, Wuerffel has done some marvelous charity work in New Orleans over the years, particularly in the Ninth Ward, so I can't say anything bad about that man, either.)


Holy Mary Mother of God! You said nice things about not one, but TWO, Gator QBs. (Both Heisman and NC QBs you dreadful people.)

/I found out this morning UGA's QB went to my high school, which means he's probably a no Christian.
 
2012-10-08 04:52:37 PM
Coach: (praying) "Please grant us the strength to beat the crap out of the other team - "
Player: "Uh...coach?"
Coach: "What?! We're in the middle of a prayer!"
Player: "Do you think we should be bothering God over a football game?"
Coach: "Well, this is important!"
Player: "But the other team is praying too......Ah, our God is stronger than their God?"
Coach: "There's only one God!"
Player: "Then am I the only one seeing a conflict of interest here?!"
Coach: "YES!"
 
2012-10-08 04:57:30 PM

TheDumbBlonde: Holy Mary Mother of God! You said nice things about not one, but TWO, Gator QBs. (Both Heisman and NC QBs you dreadful people.)


Yeah, I know. I'm not happy about it, though Wuerffel spent a few years with the Saints, so at least I can rationalize it. And my dad and I did not speak for some time after the Colts-Saints Super Bowl when I finally called BS on his die-hard fandom of the Colts and said it was all just a man crush on Payton Manning and his allegiance to the Colts would end the moment he stopped playing there (which it did), and that makes me something of a Fredo Corleone among Vols fans.

But f*ck UGA. I have a begrudging respect for all Florida has accomplished over the years, but other than producing inbred dog mascots that have a shorter life-span than this thread because of all the genetic defects, UGA has done nothing to stand out in decades. I relished watching South Carolina pants them on national TV. Honestly, I have no idea why ESPN thinks that the sun shines out of Mark Richt's ass.
 
2012-10-08 05:01:02 PM
Jesus, what a dumbass.
 
2012-10-08 05:02:01 PM

Nabb1: TheDumbBlonde: Holy Mary Mother of God! You said nice things about not one, but TWO, Gator QBs. (Both Heisman and NC QBs you dreadful people.)

Yeah, I know. I'm not happy about it, though Wuerffel spent a few years with the Saints, so at least I can rationalize it. And my dad and I did not speak for some time after the Colts-Saints Super Bowl when I finally called BS on his die-hard fandom of the Colts and said it was all just a man crush on Payton Manning and his allegiance to the Colts would end the moment he stopped playing there (which it did), and that makes me something of a Fredo Corleone among Vols fans.

But f*ck UGA. I have a begrudging respect for all Florida has accomplished over the years, but other than producing inbred dog mascots that have a shorter life-span than this thread because of all the genetic defects, UGA has done nothing to stand out in decades. I relished watching South Carolina pants them on national TV. Honestly, I have no idea why ESPN thinks that the sun shines out of Mark Richt's ass.


Peyton never beat Florida. Tell Daddy that.
 
2012-10-08 05:07:14 PM

TheDumbBlonde: Peyton never beat Florida. Tell Daddy that.


No, there are some lines you do not cross. And that one still stings me, too.
 
2012-10-08 05:09:16 PM
He does this kind of thing because he knows it's the only reason he has a career.

If he were judged solely on merit, he'd be a third stringer and nobody would know his name.
 
2012-10-08 05:10:24 PM

Nabb1: TheDumbBlonde: Peyton never beat Florida. Tell Daddy that.

No, there are some lines you do not cross. And that one still stings me, too.


Well, fathers and sons need to something to bond over, I suppose. My mother and I bonded on the tackiness of white shoes and handbags.
 
2012-10-08 05:16:57 PM

Aarontology: He does this kind of thing because he knows it's the only reason he has a career.

If he were judged solely on merit, he'd be a third stringer and nobody would know his name.


His particular brand of Christianity seems to ne threat to some people, for unknown reasons, but the guy has something things going for him:

1-He was a successful college QB who won a NC and a Heisman.
2-He has never been busted for drugs, DWI or violating NCAA rules.
3-He was never thrown out of school for stealing a lap-top.
4-His arms are JACKED.
 
2012-10-08 05:39:00 PM

Aarontology: He does this kind of thing because he knows it's the only reason he has a career.

If he were judged solely on merit, he'd be a third stringer and nobody would know his name.


I think Tebow actually does it because he believes it. The guy was homeschooled and went to college in Florida. He probably is afraid to play in NO because of voodoo.

It's his fandom that refuse to let him be judged on merit.
 
2012-10-08 05:42:12 PM

BSABSVR: It's his fandom that refuse to let him be judged on merit.


Yep. I don't even hate the guy, I just realize that the media is in such a frenzy over him, there's nothing he could do about it.

If he came out tomorrow and said "Please stop putting so much focus on me" the headlines would read "TEBOW IS SO HUMBLE HE DOESN'T WANT TO STEAL ATTENTION FROM HIS TEAM!!!!"
 
2012-10-08 05:55:43 PM
Touchdown Jesus: "Looking forward to giving God all the glory in tonight's 666th Monday Night Football game. Romans 8:37-39."

God: "Look, asshole, don't try to put the blame on me for your shiatty team getting your asses handed to you later tonight. And anyway, I've got more important things to deal with than controlling who wins a farking football game. Get a grip."
 
2012-10-08 06:59:24 PM
Football players, especially quarterbacks, should be judged on their ability to play the game first, and then whether or not they are a "good guy."

If they have the skill, give them a second look to find out their character. If it is bad, don't pick them.

If they don't have the skill, move on.

Tebow should have been a "move on."
 
2012-10-08 07:04:15 PM

AdolfOliverPanties: Football players, especially quarterbacks, should be judged on their ability to play the game first, and then whether or not they are a "good guy."

If they have the skill, give them a second look to find out their character. If it is bad, don't pick them.

If they don't have the skill, move on.

Tebow should have been a "move on."


How many players, specifically quarterbacks, from your school ever won a Heisman? I suggest you take you judgements and "move on".
 
2012-10-08 08:32:33 PM

TheDumbBlonde: AdolfOliverPanties: Football players, especially quarterbacks, should be judged on their ability to play the game first, and then whether or not they are a "good guy."

If they have the skill, give them a second look to find out their character. If it is bad, don't pick them.

If they don't have the skill, move on.

Tebow should have been a "move on."

How many players, specifically quarterbacks, from your school ever won a Heisman? I suggest you take you judgements and "move on".


My school was USC, and my Heisman trophy winning quarterback was Matt Leinart, who has been a total washout in the NFL.

Being a terrific high school or college player does not translate into being a good NFL player. The NFL is composed of the best players from every school. Tebow spent his collegiate days playing against a few of the best college players and mostly guys who would never sniff the NFL. Playing on the collegiate level allowed him to excel despite his terrible mechanics, slow delivery and inaccurate arm.

Being among the best in college doesn't mean you can play in the NFL.

Conversely, playing in the NFL does mean you could have been one of the best in college.

Tebow is not good enough to play quarterback in the NFL. I don't care what he did in college.
 
2012-10-08 08:32:33 PM
I vaguely recall watching a football game ~10 years ago where a kicker was lining up for a last-second field goal and the camera cut to players praying on the sideline. The announcer made the comment along the lines of (i'm paraphrasing), "for some reason, I don't think God is particularly interested in the result of a football game."

It was such a true, yet probably offensive comment, that I'm guessing I've invented this memory.
 
2012-10-08 08:34:13 PM
it's nice the good Lord can take off for the night and show presedence over a multi-million dollar team and
a multi-million dollar star. I guess those Ethiopians wont be eating tonight, because, the Lord is to busy with Tim Tebow .
 
2012-10-08 08:36:19 PM
MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE!?

Tim Tebow is a total Jesusy kind of Christian.

That is all.
 
2012-10-08 08:38:33 PM

rwhamann: This is why we Christians can't have nice things. Seriously.


I substitute "you for "we" but yeah...


THIS
 
2012-10-08 08:41:04 PM

Nabb1: I have no idea why ESPN thinks that the sun shines out of Mark Richt's ass.


It's the Ford truck commercials
 
2012-10-08 08:42:11 PM
Whenever I am at the race track I have this thought..Please God let me win this race..
Then I have this visual of God holding court.He says "Okay,what I wanna do in the Middle
East is,Wait.What? W.C needs to win a race"
 
2012-10-08 08:42:14 PM

TheDumbBlonde: His particular brand of Christianity seems to ne threat to some people, for unknown reasons, but the guy has something things going for him:

1-He was a successful college QB who won a NC and a Heisman.
2-He has never been busted for drugs, DWI or violating NCAA rules

3 never had an affair
4 never killed a hooker

yet
 
2012-10-08 08:45:36 PM
Dude, it's just a number. It has no power unless you believe it does.

/Chill the fark out.
 
2012-10-08 08:48:07 PM

chuggernaught: Dude, it's just a number. It has no power unless you believe it does.

/Chill the fark out.


Dude it's just a fark headline. It has no truth unless you believe it does.
 
2012-10-08 08:48:19 PM
In a climate-controlled cabinet in one corner was the original scroll in the shaky handwriting of St. John the Divine of Patmos, whose "Revelation" had been the all-time best seller. Aziraphale had found him a nice chap, if a bit too fond of odd mushrooms.
 
2012-10-08 08:50:32 PM
His twitter is full of religious tweets and verses and such. Probably what happened is that somebody mentioned that it was the 666th MNF to Tebow, he said "Oh, that's neat," and threw it in with the next tweet he was going to write anyway.
 
2012-10-08 08:50:45 PM
Will Jets fans cheer if Sanchez goes down like a Dirty Sanchez?
 
2012-10-08 08:53:05 PM
I've found the Jets season to be a modern-day equivalent to the Adam and Eve story.

Adam = Rex Ryan
Eve = Woody Johnson
Forbidden fruit = Starting Tim Tebow

Once they partake of that forbidden fruit, all hell will break loose. Angels will even materialize into superhuman football players (aka Troy Polamalu clones) as a result.
 
2012-10-08 08:55:43 PM

I Have The Touch of a Shocked Monkey: I've found the Jets season to be a modern-day equivalent to the Adam and Eve story.

Adam = Rex Ryan
Eve = Woody Johnson
Forbidden fruit = Starting Tim Tebow

Once they partake of that forbidden fruit, all hell will break loose. Angels will even materialize into superhuman football players (aka Troy Polamalu clones) as a result.


yeah but after one play they get an injury and be out for 4-6 weeks
 
2012-10-08 08:56:11 PM
Foozeball is the debbil.
 
2012-10-08 08:57:29 PM
...
 
2012-10-08 09:00:57 PM
Shouldn't it be "Jesussy", with a double "S"?
 
2012-10-08 09:10:29 PM

Piizzadude: I Have The Touch of a Shocked Monkey: I've found the Jets season to be a modern-day equivalent to the Adam and Eve story.

Adam = Rex Ryan
Eve = Woody Johnson
Forbidden fruit = Starting Tim Tebow

Once they partake of that forbidden fruit, all hell will break loose. Angels will even materialize into superhuman football players (aka Troy Polamalu clones) as a result.

yeah but after one play they get an injury and be out for 4-6 weeks


Low blow dude.

*sob*
 
2012-10-08 09:13:35 PM
Tebow is actually taking a slight, good-natured jab at his critics here. Not that they can stop sniffing their own farts long enough to pick up on it - which makes it even a bit funnier.
 
2012-10-08 09:20:22 PM
I was *sure*, absolutely *sure* this was satire.

/ farking poe's law
 
2012-10-08 09:23:12 PM

WhoopAssWayne: Tebow is actually taking a slight, good-natured jab at his critics here. Not that they can stop sniffing their own farts long enough to pick up on it - which makes it even a bit funnier.


He truly is the Mencken of his day.
 
2012-10-08 09:41:39 PM
Half of this thread is pure horseshiat and the other half is just pure. Can't distinguish between the two.

8 beers aren't helping.
 
2012-10-08 09:43:21 PM
Tebow hate. I don't understand it. And I say that as a not overly religious person.
 
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