He was just trying to attract a mate.

MaxxLarge: Jesus! Was he planing to hide the kid in the pelican-pouch?!?

[hostmypicture.com image 225x293][hostmypicture.com image 270x293]

Yea, ok, i call utter bullshiat on that story. There is absolutely no way a 10 year old boy would have the strength reach escape velocity and break away from the gravitational pull.

BSABSVR: [img2-2.timeinc.net image 600x450]



FTFY

More chins than a chinese phone book.

Hay lapa no ya, Solo!

Pistoffradish: [i.imgur.com image 480x600]

He would've gotten away ribbit if it weren't for that meddling kid.

y'all are just jealous of a man who's prepared for winter

Hey buddy, why the long face?

Dude - he's fallen a long way from the glory days when he was running Exxon Mobil..... 

Hmm...maybe call him The Follower.

I bet he gets a job in jail putting the pillow cases on the pillows

thisisyourbrainonFark: [www.grimmemennesker.dk image 541x737]

Did anyone else happen to notice the mugshots on the related stories?

I had these guys on the left...







It's a veritable gold mine!

Wait... was that a mugshot or a thumbprint?

He must be hiding food in there like a hamster.

A whole Christmas dinner, perhaps.

Aidan: Guys, I think we're looking at his gang enhancements. Sez so on the arrest record.

What, did the other gang members give all their faces to him?

8InchFloppy: [i872.photobucket.com image 300x400]

Am I the only one that sees this?

No, you're not. But what a picture of McShane to post. He wants to ravage me. To leave me whimpering and breathless. Full of anxiety and lust.

BeSerious: That must be fun to shave.

Gah. I'll bet the underside is a wet, hairy mess covered with clusters of tiny mushrooms.

Seeing the mug on mobile makes the experience. You scroll down to his nose and it looks normal, then, oh..

I just cannot understand why someone like that has to resort to abducting young boys. Serious question for all the women of Fark -- would you really turn down such a flawless specimen of manhood if you were lucky enough to have him hit on you? I mean, I'm a straight, happily married man, and I'm a little turned on by his picture. And I can only imagine how good the rest of him looks.

How does a 425 pound man escape from a soccer coach?

Critatak: His chin looks.. looks like a... a balls.

News: Attempted kidnapping at soccer practice, Fark: By a hippopotamus

Bird Man of Alcatraz

Was every too scared to post the obvious?

MAN THAT GUYS GOT A SMALL FACE!

"booked on suspicion of false imprisonment, child annoying"

My mother should have been arrested years ago!

For the first time ever, I have spit beer on my keyboard. Damn you all for wasting my beer!

Eirik: bighairyguy: You can be charged with child annoying? If only the opposite were a crime.

There was a drama teacher back in my high school days that was accused of that. He hadn't done enough to call it molestation, but he was charged with basically being creepy with a group of his female students. We were all pretty sure it was B.S., coming from a couple of students that were failing drama(!) and were looking to get back at him.

At least, until it came out that the two year gap in his resume was because he neglected to mention a previous teaching position where he had been fired after being caught, naked, in the closet of one of his female students. After that, we were more likely to believe there was something to the charges.

Did you by any chance go to Handsworth?

I'm laughing so hard my face hurts. I love you all.

bighairyguy: You can be charged with child annoying? If only the opposite were a crime.

There was a drama teacher back in my high school days that was accused of that. He hadn't done enough to call it molestation, but he was charged with basically being creepy with a group of his female students. We were all pretty sure it was B.S., coming from a couple of students that were failing drama(!) and were looking to get back at him.

At least, until it came out that the two year gap in his resume was because he neglected to mention a previous teaching position where he had been fired after being caught, naked, in the closet of one of his female students. After that, we were more likely to believe there was something to the charges.

SirTanon: [www.adweek.com image 425x309]

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED


+x
 
Let x be whatever it takes.

digitalrain: FTA: Espinoza was booked on suspicion of false imprisonment, child annoying, and gang enhancements, for being a documented gang member.

*A* gang member? Holy hell...his chin is the whole damn gang - the Sapo Espeluznante gang.

Better arrest many aunts and all the great aunts.

No one read the article then? No one caught this line?

"Officers eventually located Victor Joseph Espinoza, by the helicopter, hiding in the backyard of a nearby residence."

Good thing those cops had The Helicopter... the good one.

Arachnophobe: I should be in the kitchen: [content7.flixster.com image 520x400]

Kanemano: [content7.flixster.com image 520x400] 

he has very good Kung fu

*Tiny Fist Shake Technique!!*

yeah... trimulpost fail!

MadameX: /hot like curry sauce

I bet he just absolutely destroys a toilet.

 
/hot like curry sauce

Arachnophobe: He is clearly a master of the Toad Technique, very dangerous.

[i1126.photobucket.com image 600x250]

Not when you master the Buddhist Palm.

Resembles the frog guy from the movie Kung Fu Hustle...

It's like his second, third, fourth, fifth, and sixth chins all collaborated on one SUPERCHIN.

Even for Fark, that ain't right.

Carmageddon, anyone? (Surprised no one beat me to this one...)

I should be in the kitchen: [content7.flixster.com image 520x400]

Kanemano: [content7.flixster.com image 520x400] 

he has very good Kung fu

*Tiny Fist Shake Technique!!*

you liberals can't help but make fun of a successful whatever the fark he is huh? huh? I bet he was just gonna offer that kid a job washing his ass. Now WE have to feed him..Good God !!!

 

he has very good Kung fu

whyRpeoplesostupid: [i196.photobucket.com image 800x567]

Pretty sure that is libel to the potato... also a death sentence in Idaho.

The frog he did a rapin' go uh-huh...

Abduct or swallow?

The human thumb. Every time I look at the picture, I start hearing Huell's breathing.

the_rev: Wonder if they charged him with goitering...

awesome.

Nice try, subby. But I live in the deep south. I see 10 creatures who are just as fat during a quick walk through the local Wal-Mart.

Kermit's cousin?

That no good dirty LOW down son of a biatch.

Snert