Obligatory: (linked for the squeamish and because Fark mods are a bunch of doody-heads).

Dang, he must've been painting lines like a bat out of hell.

Excellent, Subby!

cretinbob: One of the coolest things about Ohio, is that if you stop at the first rest stop coming into the state from PA, there is a monument to all the state DOT workers who died, well, in the line of duty. Those guys have one hell of a dangerous job and are extremely overlooked.

There's one here in VA, too, on I-64 coming down over the Blue Ridge, not far from where TFA took place, incidentally.

JackieRabbit: Excellent, Subby!

/humblebow

cgraves67: Dang, he must've been painting lines like a bat out of hell.

Thinking the same thing.

The driver of a roadway line-painting truck, headed north on Interstate 81 to a Nelson County worksite, died this morning when the left front tire of his truck blew out and the truck careened into a guardrail and overturned.

How freaking fast was he going?

RIP road painter guy.

He was driving a line painting truck.

Doesn't mean he was painting lines.

I drive I-81 daily. 81 sucks and sometimes scary as hell.

No one to blame, just really bad luck. Very sad.

_{/painting was not underway}

This closed the highway into work this morning for over two hours. I was stuck in traffic for about three and a half. This morning at the gym was weights and I always pound a protein shake just before I leave the gym. It's an off and on kind of thing, but sometimes the shakes give me explosive diarrhea. Those mornings, I have to speed and sprint into the office before I shame myself. Wouldn't you know that I had an attack this morning sitting in traffic.

It was especially bad because I was right up alongside where the truck was overturned. The accident mangled the driver pretty bad, so they were basically cutting chunks of him out of the vehicle and throwing them into a pile alongside the road. He was a big fat bastard, like most of them, so the pile was a good four feet high. That's a pretty barren stretch otherwise, so I didn't have much choice but to try to hide behind the body and do my business.

I don't know if it's much a consolation to anyone else who was stuck in this traffic, but I crapped on him pretty good and then used his flannel to wipe with. Check your tires before you ruin everyone's Friday, asshole.

Some souls aren't meant to color within the lines.

I came here expecting an article about rocket-powered needles.

Leaving disappointed.

zabadu: cgraves67: Dang, he must've been painting lines like a bat out of hell.

Thinking the same thing.

The driver of a roadway line-painting truck, headed north on Interstate 81 to a Nelson County worksite, died this morning when the left front tire of his truck blew out and the truck careened into a guardrail and overturned.

How freaking fast was he going?

Those things aren't designed like an F1 car, you know. There's quite a bit of weight, typically situated high off the road. And it doesn't say he was actually striping at the time.

High CG + weight = rollover.
See also SUV.

Since he wasn't painting lines, why does it matter what type of truck he was driving? "City worker dies in traffic accident" the rest of the information is kind of fluff.

FTA:
He was then trasnferred to the University of Virginia

Oh my god. They must have hit the typesetter, too. 

/wahoo wah

spentmiles: This closed the highway into work this morning for over two hours. I was stuck in traffic for about three and a half. This morning at the gym was weights and I always pound a protein shake just before I leave the gym. It's an off and on kind of thing, but sometimes the shakes give me explosive diarrhea. Those mornings, I have to speed and sprint into the office before I shame myself. Wouldn't you know that I had an attack this morning sitting in traffic.

It was especially bad because I was right up alongside where the truck was overturned. The accident mangled the driver pretty bad, so they were basically cutting chunks of him out of the vehicle and throwing them into a pile alongside the road. He was a big fat bastard, like most of them, so the pile was a good four feet high. That's a pretty barren stretch otherwise, so I didn't have much choice but to try to hide behind the body and do my business.

I don't know if it's much a consolation to anyone else who was stuck in this traffic, but I crapped on him pretty good and then used his flannel to wipe with. Check your tires before you ruin everyone's Friday, asshole.

You make the world a better place for me.

cretinbob: One of the coolest things about Ohio, is that if you stop at the first rest stop coming into the state from PA, there is a monument to all the state DOT workers who died, well, in the line of duty. Those guys have one hell of a dangerous job and are extremely overlooked.

Also, if that's one of the coolest things about Ohio remind me to stay out of Ohio.

Elegy: zabadu: cgraves67: Dang, he must've been painting lines like a bat out of hell.

Thinking the same thing.

The driver of a roadway line-painting truck, headed north on Interstate 81 to a Nelson County worksite, died this morning when the left front tire of his truck blew out and the truck careened into a guardrail and overturned.

How freaking fast was he going?

Those things aren't designed like an F1 car, you know. There's quite a bit of weight, typically situated high off the road. And it doesn't say he was actually striping at the time.

High CG + weight = rollover.
See also SUV.

I think we all realized that about 2 seconds into the article. It's just more fun to think that he was painting lines at high speed.

squidgod2000: He was driving a line painting truck.

Doesn't mean he was painting lines.

Could have been doing them, though.

squidgod2000: He was driving a line painting truck.

Doesn't mean he was painting lines.

Possibly doing lines though.

spentmiles: This closed the highway into work this morning for over two hours. I was stuck in traffic for about three and a half. This morning at the gym was weights and I always pound a protein shake just before I leave the gym. It's an off and on kind of thing, but sometimes the shakes give me explosive diarrhea. Those mornings, I have to speed and sprint into the office before I shame myself. Wouldn't you know that I had an attack this morning sitting in traffic.

It was especially bad because I was right up alongside where the truck was overturned. The accident mangled the driver pretty bad, so they were basically cutting chunks of him out of the vehicle and throwing them into a pile alongside the road. He was a big fat bastard, like most of them, so the pile was a good four feet high. That's a pretty barren stretch otherwise, so I didn't have much choice but to try to hide behind the body and do my business.

I don't know if it's much a consolation to anyone else who was stuck in this traffic, but I crapped on him pretty good and then used his flannel to wipe with. Check your tires before you ruin everyone's Friday, asshole.

Pffft, the whole thing smacks of effort, man.

/You are trying too hard, champ.

cgraves67: Elegy: zabadu: cgraves67: Dang, he must've been painting lines like a bat out of hell.

Thinking the same thing.

The driver of a roadway line-painting truck, headed north on Interstate 81 to a Nelson County worksite, died this morning when the left front tire of his truck blew out and the truck careened into a guardrail and overturned.

How freaking fast was he going?

Those things aren't designed like an F1 car, you know. There's quite a bit of weight, typically situated high off the road. And it doesn't say he was actually striping at the time.

High CG + weight = rollover.
See also SUV.

I think we all realized that about 2 seconds into the article. It's just more fun to think that he was painting lines at high speed.

Dad was a Highway Patrolman. I kind of understand how car accidents work.
But it was fun to picture him flying. The driver, not my dad.

Psychopusher: squidgod2000: He was driving a line painting truck.

Doesn't mean he was painting lines.

Could have been doing them, though.

Jinx!

I am actually pretty familiar with the Raphine area. Those are some steep ass sides on that stretch of road. My guess is that thing didn't just overturn once, but that baby flipped and rolled a few times. It is a bit ironic a VDOT truck isn't better maintained though...

halfof33: spentmiles: This closed the highway into work this morning for over two hours. I was stuck in traffic for about three and a half. This morning at the gym was weights and I always pound a protein shake just before I leave the gym. It's an off and on kind of thing, but sometimes the shakes give me explosive diarrhea. Those mornings, I have to speed and sprint into the office before I shame myself. Wouldn't you know that I had an attack this morning sitting in traffic.

It was especially bad because I was right up alongside where the truck was overturned. The accident mangled the driver pretty bad, so they were basically cutting chunks of him out of the vehicle and throwing them into a pile alongside the road. He was a big fat bastard, like most of them, so the pile was a good four feet high. That's a pretty barren stretch otherwise, so I didn't have much choice but to try to hide behind the body and do my business.

I don't know if it's much a consolation to anyone else who was stuck in this traffic, but I crapped on him pretty good and then used his flannel to wipe with. Check your tires before you ruin everyone's Friday, asshole.

Pffft, the whole thing smacks of effort, man.

/You are trying too hard, champ.

You don't know funny, n00b

Color line truck driver seen your work from far and near, in dark and in light, and through thick and thin fog. Hope you got into the passing lane to heaven. Peace

ransack.: You don't know funny, n00b

I don't think that Spent smiles is going to sleep with you, Biff.

But i guess you are one of those guys who forwards his posts to your "google group" huh? Actually That's a pretty funny image.

I imagine you sitting in your parent's- no grandmother's- basement, with some kind of headset apparatus on your acne pocked melon, snorting with laughter. Your potato fingers stab at an oversized keypad and suddenly your only friend in the world, Gnuyn your pen pal from Cambodia, answers the phone and you grunt to him in your exclusive made-up pet language that he should check out fark.com and read his post.

Of course he has no idea what you are talking about. He never has. But he clucks into the receiver slavishly because your mom keeps sending him ten dollar bills every christmas so he has to be nice to you.

You chuckle some more, careful not to spill your capri sun, and then finger type a post bookended by some dazzling html that makes it stand out from all the others with its bold color. You are so proud of yourself that you don't bother to read any other comments, you simply 'ctl f' your login over and over again to keep track of all the felating responses to your superior humor. Gnuyn laughs nervously. You take that as a compliment.

You reread your posts until you become aroused and have to start typing one-handed. You come close to climaxing when you find someone who spelled "you are" as "your." Deep down you wish you had someone else to call that would actually listen to your nonsense- and you know it's nonsense. If you posted anything close to a rational thought no one would respond to you- you know, you've tried. So you blather on. You pray that someone will reply in the same way most of us pray we had two dicks. Perhaps we can borrow yours? Since you've never bothered to use it?

You briefly wonder what it would be like to be with a woman. A second later you regain control and resume stabbing your alienware keyboard with your stubby cheeto fingers and use your shoulder to push your glasses back into place above your fat dimpled sweaty nose.

I imagine your grandmother pounding on the basement door, yelling at you that you should come to bed. You release your two inch mushroom in a panic and fling your "love" sock into a dark corner. You pathetically try to pull up your sweatpants while bleating, "five more minutes, Nana!"

You rifle off one more razor sharp post and then cry yourself to sleep. You dream of Optimus Prime giving you a back rub while you ride He-man's cat around your high school gym to terrorize the cool kids. You have one thumb in your mouth and the other in your anus.

Just another beautiful day in the life of Immaculate Misconception ransack.

meddleRPI: cretinbob: One of the coolest things about Ohio, is that if you stop at the first rest stop coming into the state from PA, there is a monument to all the state DOT workers who died, well, in the line of duty. Those guys have one hell of a dangerous job and are extremely overlooked.

There's one here in VA, too, on I-64 coming down over the Blue Ridge, not far from where TFA took place, incidentally.


I have a feeling that when Bob Leweke goes over the news in the morning he'll attempt a snarky comment that's chock full of fail about that.

cretinbob: One of the coolest things about Ohio, is that if you stop at the first rest stop coming into the state from PA, there is a monument to all the state DOT workers who died, well, in the line of duty. Those guys have one hell of a dangerous job and are extremely overlooked.

As an example, I would think that Ohio's, specifically Cleveland, having the second largest theater district in the country, only behind NYC may be higher on the list than the monument at a rest stop.

halfof33: ransack.: You don't know funny, n00b

I don't think that Spent smiles is going to sleep with you, Biff.

But i guess you are one of those guys who forwards his posts to your "google group" huh? Actually That's a pretty funny image.

I imagine you sitting in your parent's- no grandmother's- basement, with some kind of headset apparatus on your acne pocked melon, snorting with laughter. Your potato fingers stab at an oversized keypad and suddenly your only friend in the world, Gnuyn your pen pal from Cambodia, answers the phone and you grunt to him in your exclusive made-up pet language that he should check out fark.com and read his post.

Of course he has no idea what you are talking about. He never has. But he clucks into the receiver slavishly because your mom keeps sending him ten dollar bills every christmas so he has to be nice to you.

You chuckle some more, careful not to spill your capri sun, and then finger type a post bookended by some dazzling html that makes it stand out from all the others with its bold color. You are so proud of yourself that you don't bother to read any other comments, you simply 'ctl f' your login over and over again to keep track of all the felating responses to your superior humor. Gnuyn laughs nervously. You take that as a compliment.

You reread your posts until you become aroused and have to start typing one-handed. You come close to climaxing when you find someone who spelled "you are" as "your." Deep down you wish you had someone else to call that would actually listen to your nonsense- and you know it's nonsense. If you posted anything close to a rational thought no one would respond to you- you know, you've tried. So you blather on. You pray that someone will reply in the same way most of us pray we had two dicks. Perhaps we can borrow yours? Since you've never bothered to use it?

You briefly wonder what it would be like to be with a woman. A second later you regain control and resume stabbing your alienware keyboard with your stubby cheeto fingers and use your shoulder to push your glasses back into place above your fat dimpled sweaty nose.

I imagine your grandmother pounding on the basement door, yelling at you that you should come to bed. You release your two inch mushroom in a panic and fling your "love" sock into a dark corner. You pathetically try to pull up your sweatpants while bleating, "five more minutes, Nana!"

You rifle off one more razor sharp post and then cry yourself to sleep. You dream of Optimus Prime giving you a back rub while you ride He-man's cat around your high school gym to terrorize the cool kids. You have one thumb in your mouth and the other in your anus.

Just another beautiful day in the life of Immaculate Misconception ransack.

Actually, THAT'S trying too hard.

kisseswookies: Actually, THAT'S trying too hard

You don't know funny, n00b

halfof33: ransack.: You don't know funny, n00b

.herp........... Your potato fingers stab at an oversized keypad .................

......keyboard with your stubby cheeto fingers .........derp

So, He's eating both cheetos and potato chips? Get it straight, man

/that was sad and definitely trying too hard
 //this n00b agrees that spentmiles is the funny and that ransack was spot on

Fox news is reporting that a second line painting truck has just hit the CNN tower.

Seat's Taken: So, He's eating both cheetos and potato chips? Get it straight, man

Uh, he's eating Cheetos with potato shaped fingers, moran.

btw: welcome to Fark.

lolz.

halfof33: Seat's Taken: So, He's eating both cheetos and potato chips? Get it straight, man

Uh, he's eating Cheetos with potato shaped fingers, moran.

btw: welcome to Fark.

lolz.

Man, and I told Gnyun that I totally burned you. DAMMIT

/5 more minutes Nana!

halfof33: ransack.: You don't know funny, n00b

I don't think that Spent smiles is going to sleep with you, Biff.

But i guess you are one of those guys who forwards his posts to your "google group" huh? Actually That's a pretty funny image.

I imagine you sitting in your parent's- no grandmother's- basement, with some kind of headset apparatus on your acne pocked melon, snorting with laughter. Your potato fingers stab at an oversized keypad and suddenly your only friend in the world, Gnuyn your pen pal from Cambodia, answers the phone and you grunt to him in your exclusive made-up pet language that he should check out fark.com and read his post.

Of course he has no idea what you are talking about. He never has. But he clucks into the receiver slavishly because your mom keeps sending him ten dollar bills every christmas so he has to be nice to you.

You chuckle some more, careful not to spill your capri sun, and then finger type a post bookended by some dazzling html that makes it stand out from all the others with its bold color. You are so proud of yourself that you don't bother to read any other comments, you simply 'ctl f' your login over and over again to keep track of all the felating responses to your superior humor. Gnuyn laughs nervously. You take that as a compliment.

You reread your posts until you become aroused and have to start typing one-handed. You come close to climaxing when you find someone who spelled "you are" as "your." Deep down you wish you had someone else to call that would actually listen to your nonsense- and you know it's nonsense. If you posted anything close to a rational thought no one would respond to you- you know, you've tried. So you blather on. You pray that someone will reply in the same way most of us pray we had two dicks. Perhaps we can borrow yours? Since you've never bothered to use it?

You briefly wonder what it would be like to be with a woman. A second later you regain control and resume stabbing your alienware keyboard with ...