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(Gawker)   Dearest Friends, Thank you for agreeing to be a bridesmaid, here are some guidelines for you to follow. Please be aware that if you cannot commit the next six-months of your lives to me then you will be replaced, but you are still invited to attend   (gawker.com) divider line 374
    More: Asinine  
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23613 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Oct 2012 at 10:05 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-10-05 02:35:09 PM

namegoeshere: katerbug72: I was in my brother's wedding a couple weeks ago and the bride couldn't have been more laid back. Not a bridezilla moment to be had AND there were fireworks, a candy buffet and a nacho cart.

[fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 850x633]

Also, my son picked up his first date:

[fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 850x637]

He walked away saying "Bye!".

Aw... that's really cute. But the tights? You know where that's headed, right?


It was a short relationship.....about twenty seconds. She left him on the grounds that he was an icky boy.

sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2012-10-05 02:35:48 PM

Magorn: Another dear friend of mine and huge Star Wars geek was having a Scottish-themed wedding (full kilt and jacket for us groomsmen despite the groom's name ending in -Ski and hers being as Italian as the day is long) which meant she had to have a bagpiper, which led to the fact that she marched down the aisle to the tune of a lone piper playing the Imperial March.


Even though as mentioned we're going to have Star Wars touches folded into this Roman Holiday theme wedding the men are all going to wear their kilts and family tartans because I want Future Mr Mouse and his family to happy and comfortable. Also his dad is the President of their Clan. Yes, apparently Clans have presidents but they still have to answer to their chief... who is a Canadian. Anyway I'm basically doing a nerdy mash-up of Roman Holiday, Star Wars and then we're going to have a Scottish handfast where his mom is going to give me a scarf in their tartan but we're going to do the toast with my mother's German Nuremberg cup (see below). It's going to be totally us and true to what we like.

blogs.thepoconos.com
He wants to practice the toast ahead of time. I say no because it's supposed to show people that we can work together in this marriage and so what if he makes me spill my wine because am I going to wear that dress again?
 
2012-10-05 02:37:27 PM

KatjaMouse: cosmiquemuffin: - Pro photographer. We gave everyone a disposable camera (YES! it was a long time ago) and had them turn the cameras in at the end so we could cull through, pick the best and send them all out to the folks who came. This turned out okay, but certain "money shots" were not gotten.

I told my mom I just need her help to pay for the food and venue which doesn't have to be all that amazing and I'm flexible with the dress but the one thing I will not budge on is the photographer. I am willing drop 4 grand if I have to to get the best possible photos for this wedding because 30 years from now I want to look at those pictures and swoon, goddammit.


I'd strong advise doing what my sister did: Hiring a Photojournalist who did weddings on the side rather than a wedding photgrapher per se. Her shots are mostly candids rather than posed and so don't look like wedding photographs so much as a "Day in the life" kinda book. The unscripted unposed moments evoke more and deeper memories of the event itself than a bunch of poses from a staged photshoot would (and the posed one he DID take on the beach is one of the most beautiful and romantic photgraphs I have ever seen anywhere-ever)
 
2012-10-05 02:39:47 PM
My husband and I had a wedding. The actual wedding was a 20min ceremony with JP, which took place at the same place where the following reception was held.

The reception part was very important to my parents, especially my father. So, he paid for what he wanted and a good time was had by all. Also, while my family is small, my parents have a lot of friends, and my husband's family is big. If my parents hadn't chosen to contribute, and therefore pay for their preferences, we would not have been able to afford that reception, and would have done something much smaller and more low key. I don't believe I went bridezilla on anyone--3 bridesmaids, all related to me, told them to pick whatever dress they wanted in blue. Anyway, 8yrs now, and going strong.
 
2012-10-05 02:39:56 PM

kiwimoogle84: Here's a wedding / invitations planning tip- when ordering them online, remember that if there's 150 people coming, this does NOT mean you order 150 invitations. You're laughing at me, but I seriously was that dumb. Oh and PS, people don't write return addresses on their envelopes, so come up with a system to ensure you know which RSVP came back from who.


Dude, you don't have to tell me. I'm a graphic designer who specializes in print media so I know how this works. I'm just going to do the paper stuff myself and order it printed so that will save us on costs there. As for the RSVP card I thought I would have the kind that said "(Blank name line) will (not) be attending with (X) total people". Or did you do that and they still were left blank?
 
2012-10-05 02:41:04 PM

Tom_Slick: First marriage wife a bridezilla, it last 2 very long years and when she left she took my dog. Second marriage (first marriage for my second wife) low key fun at an airplane hanger, took off afterwards in her B200 for a 2 week long honeymoon flying around wherever we wanted. Best 5 years of my life until that biatch named cancer took her away from me and our 3 year old.

/find a low key woman and enjoy every minute of it.


Well... that's depressing.

Live Long and Prosper.
 
2012-10-05 02:46:12 PM
We did not have a wedding party. No Bridesmaids, no Groomsmen, no Ring Bearers or Flower Girls. We sent out invites (a whole 30 of them), people showed up. It was a totally stress free event and not one person declined.
 
2012-10-05 02:53:30 PM

flyinghouse99: What's the motivation in writing such a fake letter?


Buzz, and now that we're on page 7 of this threed, you can see it's working. I trust other forums who've seen the Gawker piece are similarly engrossed in discussing the matter. Traffic is generated to The Gawker, and thus, we all stroke the Gawkerboner into supreme hardness.
 
2012-10-05 02:55:09 PM

katerbug72: katerbug72:
It was a short relationship.....about twenty seconds. She left him on the grounds that he was an icky boy.


Does he like blondes? My daughter is available for wedding dates. :) 

i7.photobucket.com">
 
2012-10-05 02:57:05 PM
SWMBO and I had a friend marry us (in MA someone can be a "solemnizer" once per year), and then we had a contradance (how we met,and we got married in the hall we met at) with about 80 friends and family. People brought food they wanted to share, and we had "hors d'oeuvres" and an open bar. My son (then 10) played our first waltz for us on his fiddle.
 
2012-10-05 02:58:02 PM
Two friends of mine were married in a gazebo overlooking a lake in a downtown park, by a Justice of the Peace. They dressed nicely, but not formally, and the witnesses included a crowd of homeless folks and a gay running group who were doing laps around the lake. Afterwards there was a fun-packed reception at home with tons of food and merriment. It was all great, and yesterday they celebrated a very happy 15th anniversary.

When speaking with them, I learned that they considered the marriage itself simply to be a legal thing that had to get done, and the real pleasure was found in spending time with each other, family and friends.
 
2012-10-05 02:58:57 PM

KatjaMouse: kiwimoogle84: Here's a wedding / invitations planning tip- when ordering them online, remember that if there's 150 people coming, this does NOT mean you order 150 invitations. You're laughing at me, but I seriously was that dumb. Oh and PS, people don't write return addresses on their envelopes, so come up with a system to ensure you know which RSVP came back from who.

Dude, you don't have to tell me. I'm a graphic designer who specializes in print media so I know how this works. I'm just going to do the paper stuff myself and order it printed so that will save us on costs there. As for the RSVP card I thought I would have the kind that said "(Blank name line) will (not) be attending with (X) total people". Or did you do that and they still were left blank?


I had a line for your name. I got back fifteen cards with only the meal choice and no return address. A friend got smart, she sent out the RSVP cards with a number. So even if they were dumb, we still at least knew WHO was dumb.

And that works, glad your job will help in that dept. I just laugh because it didn't occur to me that there's six people under one roof and I had 90 invites just sitting collecting dust afterwards.
 
2012-10-05 03:00:15 PM
I thoroughly enjoyed my wedding to Mrs TCaptain. She wasn't a bridezilla (although she's horrified to think she may have been).

She did most of the planning, but we found a great venue that handled 70% of everything (restaurant with dance hall, supplied the DJ).

Was it the perfect princess day? No...but it was close and we got what we wanted.

The thing is, both in my head and hers, we don't remember the crap that went wrong unless we really think about it.

Thing is Mrs T wasn't unreasonable about anything and she was WAY too hard on herself more than anyone else (she's Type A, knows it, so it's easy on us..but she went nuts trying to do everything on her own).

On the day of, I tried to run interception on as much as I could (the flowers were late, only half were delivered, wrong deliveries) and I'm proud to say I handled it...hell, I was an action hero :) (There's a cool story about getting the cake topper...)

Hell, the DJ hounded us for a very specific playlist and beyond the two songs for the bride and groom's first dance (and the parents thereof) he played NONE of them (nor did he play any of the requests from the guests).

Again, not something I remember unless I really THINK about it.

It's really true what a poster said above...Leading up to the day, you want everything to be PERFECT. On the day of, you just care about each other and enjoying the moment.

I still get a little misty thinking about it. My perfect memory of Mrs T. will always be when the doors open and she stepped into the room to walk up the aisle.

At that point, I promise you, neither one of us were thinking about the flowers, the fact that the bridesmaids were late getting there or anything of dozens of bullshiat things that went wrong.

If at that moment, THAT'S what you're thinking about? You ARE at the wrong wedding because you shouldn't be getting married.

/Still together, but it's only been a few years.
//hoping for a lot more.
 
2012-10-05 03:17:49 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: flyinghouse99: What's the motivation in writing such a fake letter?

Buzz, and now that we're on page 7 of this threed, you can see it's working. I trust other forums who've seen the Gawker piece are similarly engrossed in discussing the matter. Traffic is generated to The Gawker, and thus, we all stroke the Gawkerboner into supreme hardness.


Yes, I see. It also seems that a sure fire way of garnering interest is making sure it is about a topic that encourages people to tell anecdotes about how much better they are than the person in the article. Good to know.
 
2012-10-05 03:31:57 PM
BrynnMacFlynn: ... Okay, wives of Fark, be honest, is it really necessary to be a complete biatch? Do you wish you'd been a bridezilla if only a little? Did it really ruin your entire life to not control every little detail of the wedding?

/important because I'm hoping and hoping that the boyfriend will propose soon


For some things you should be a biatch. When you're haggling over pricing, you're dealing with people who do this for a living and are out to make money. For the most part a lot of these people don't give a shiat about it being your special day, because they deal with "special days" all the flipping time. They are overcharging you by at least 100% (obviously unless you're going through friends), so 1) things should be perfect and 2) you should negotiate. That being said, don't be a raging holy-crap-when-did-a-demon-get-here biatch. Be firm, make your expectations clear. I SHOULD have done this with my photographer but did not, and I wasted almost $4K on that experience. I DID do that with my florist over an almost-nothing issue, which was that the corsages didn't have elastic wristbands on them when they were delivered, which is a problem considering nobody wanted to put a pin through their dress. I called the flowershop and told them what happened and that they needed to fix the situation, they came back and added the wristbands. And now I recommend them to everybody because they were willing to drop everything and fix the little mistake.

(And, if you are having a very small casual wedding and not going the traditional venue / photographer / seamstress / florist / etc. route, none of this applies. Just be nice)

For friends and family, be low key. Be as low key as humanly possible. Always keep in mind, the wedding is to celebrate the start of a wonderful and amazing life with a wonderful amazing partner, and you're uniting two sets of friends and families. There is no better way to get started on the wrong foot than to lose sight of this and fixate on the fact that the dyed shoes don't match the purses or whatever. That being said, the more elaborate your wedding, the more likely something will go wrong and the more likely it will be noticed. Just have a mellow wedding.
 
2012-10-05 03:35:12 PM

KatjaMouse: cosmiquemuffin: - Pro photographer. We gave everyone a disposable camera (YES! it was a long time ago) and had them turn the cameras in at the end so we could cull through, pick the best and send them all out to the folks who came. This turned out okay, but certain "money shots" were not gotten.

I told my mom I just need her help to pay for the food and venue which doesn't have to be all that amazing and I'm flexible with the dress but the one thing I will not budge on is the photographer. I am willing drop 4 grand if I have to to get the best possible photos for this wedding because 30 years from now I want to look at those pictures and swoon, goddammit.


To anyone who is planning a wedding, this is awesome advice. I'm not sure about the 4 grand, I have no idea what it costs now.. but make sure your photog has a good reputation and isn't a sleazeball. My SIL (mentioned above, the one straight from hell) recommended this guy and he was such a pervert. He wanted me to do all kinds of porn star poses in my dress. I only wish I was kidding.

I had signed a contract with him for a certain amount which included photos of my choice, beautifully placed in a leatherbound album. When we got the proofs, he also sent an order form for single reprints, which we copied and brought around to family that were interested in having prints made. We spent a lot of time going through those proofs with different family members, getting everyone's orders ready. When I went to turn them in, he said nooo, we weren't able to choose our own photos, he was just showing us the proofs. He was going to choose the pics he thought were best. Oh and ordering more? no, that wasn't possible, we'd have to pay for a whole new package to do that. He ignored the fact that our single orders would have totalled out to more than the original packages that he offered.. And why on earth did he send the order forms for reprints? He said they were put in the box by mistake and weren't valid offers or prices.

I walked out with the proofs and never looked back. Thankfully, they don't have a stamp or anything else on them to prevent copies, but they do have texture, which makes copies look like we all have a horrible case of leprosy.

/knows of at least one pose he put me in that didn't show up in the proofs. I refused most of them, but a couple were cute suggestions, including that one. I'm sure he got a direct shot of my breasts, looking down my dress at an angle... and I'm sure he whacked off to it for years afterwards.
 
2012-10-05 03:39:22 PM
When I get married, I am getting a small herd of goats from my family. My guests will be asked to either: keep their money and think of us fondly the next time they lift a glass, or if they insist - they are more than welcome to bring a gift that would be fun for all, like a water wiggle or a some lawn darts.

The goats, because I am from a rural, southern family and I am in negotiations on a small farm right now. If all goes well, my mama has promised me some fainting goats because I like them and think they are funny. If I married, she would derive great pleasure in trussing a few up in flowers and walking them up to me at my wedding.

The gifts...man, who needs another thing from the Pottery Barn? I'm just going to have to sweep it up when the iguana decides that some gorgeous vase looks like a great place to practice his suprise ninja leap attacks? Then I'll feel bad.
 
2012-10-05 03:47:22 PM

Beanlet: KatjaMouse: cosmiquemuffin: - Pro photographer. We gave everyone a disposable camera (YES! it was a long time ago) and had them turn the cameras in at the end so we could cull through, pick the best and send them all out to the folks who came. This turned out okay, but certain "money shots" were not gotten.

I told my mom I just need her help to pay for the food and venue which doesn't have to be all that amazing and I'm flexible with the dress but the one thing I will not budge on is the photographer. I am willing drop 4 grand if I have to to get the best possible photos for this wedding because 30 years from now I want to look at those pictures and swoon, goddammit.

To anyone who is planning a wedding, this is awesome advice. I'm not sure about the 4 grand, I have no idea what it costs now.. but make sure your photog has a good reputation and isn't a sleazeball. My SIL (mentioned above, the one straight from hell) recommended this guy and he was such a pervert. He wanted me to do all kinds of porn star poses in my dress. I only wish I was kidding.

I had signed a contract with him for a certain amount which included photos of my choice, beautifully placed in a leatherbound album. When we got the proofs, he also sent an order form for single reprints, which we copied and brought around to family that were interested in having prints made. We spent a lot of time going through those proofs with different family members, getting everyone's orders ready. When I went to turn them in, he said nooo, we weren't able to choose our own photos, he was just showing us the proofs. He was going to choose the pics he thought were best. Oh and ordering more? no, that wasn't possible, we'd have to pay for a whole new package to do that. He ignored the fact that our single orders would have totalled out to more than the original packages that he offered.. And why on earth did he send the order forms for reprints? He said they were put in the box by mistake and weren't valid offers or prices.

I walked out with the proofs and never looked back. Thankfully, they don't have a stamp or anything else on them to prevent copies, but they do have texture, which makes copies look like we all have a horrible case of leprosy.

/knows of at least one pose he put me in that didn't show up in the proofs. I refused most of them, but a couple were cute suggestions, including that one. I'm sure he got a direct shot of my breasts, looking down my dress at an angle... and I'm sure he whacked off to it for years afterwards.


Oh god that's awful. My stepdad is a fairly skilled photographer so I just had him do mine, but if I go big for round two, my thought is to find someone who is trying to start a business. If I see their work and they're promising, likely they'll be less than half the cost of a regular pro since they're starting out.

I got my sister's wedding cake that way. That was my gift. My friend had been doing it from home for years and was talented with the fondant stuff that's all over cakes to make them pretty. I got a pro quality cake, designed just how my sister wanted it, for $100.
 
2012-10-05 03:48:11 PM
I never knew there were wedding hipsters... let's see:

1) Chuck Taylors
2) Keg Beer
3) Barbeque
4) Short Notice and/or No Family.
5) Ceremony under 5 minutes (I think the shorter the more "cool" points you get)

What else can we add?

/Perpetually single
//Have been the "go to" Bachelor Party planning guy for about 15 years.
///My friend's wives hate me.
 
2012-10-05 03:49:54 PM

Beanlet: To anyone who is planning a wedding, this is awesome advice. I'm not sure about the 4 grand, I have no idea what it costs now.. but make sure your photog has a good reputation and isn't a sleazeball. My SIL (mentioned above, the one straight from hell) recommended this guy and he was such a pervert. He wanted me to do all kinds of porn star poses in my dress. I only wish I was kidding.


I fell in love with a photographer I met at a bridal expo last month. A bride believed so much in her work that she drove out from Pennsylvania with her own wedding album to help run her booth. And she didn't have just a dozen photos on display, she had almost 100 plus that bride's own album which was just shot after shot of amazing. And on top of that this chick is fun. She even did this fun zombie engagement session:

sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.netsphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.netsphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net

And my sister told me that she wants to do a vintage pin-up photo session with this woman as my Bachlorette party.
 
2012-10-05 03:53:02 PM
It makes me sad that women like this seem to have no trouble finding and keeping men when there are so many kind, grounded, intellectual women who spend their lives alone.

I wonder what she looks like - I'm assuming she's pretty. Good looks cover a multitude of personality flaws, at least for a while.
 
2012-10-05 03:54:50 PM
1981. I'm the one in polyester. Think the dress cost $80 at the time.
imageshack.us

KatjaMouse: Beanlet: To anyone who is planning a wedding, this is awesome advice. I'm not sure about the 4 grand, I have no idea what it costs now.. but make sure your photog has a good reputation and isn't a sleazeball. My SIL (mentioned above, the one straight from hell) recommended this guy and he was such a pervert. He wanted me to do all kinds of porn star poses in my dress. I only wish I was kidding.

I fell in love with a photographer I met at a bridal expo last month. A bride believed so much in her work that she drove out from Pennsylvania with her own wedding album to help run her booth. And she didn't have just a dozen photos on display, she had almost 100 plus that bride's own album which was just shot after shot of amazing. And on top of that this chick is fun. She even did this fun zombie engagement session:

[sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net image 310x206][sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 310x206][sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 310x206]

And my sister told me that she wants to do a vintage pin-up photo session with this woman as my Bachlorette party.


God, I hate this trend.
 
2012-10-05 03:55:29 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: I never knew there were wedding hipsters... let's see:

1) Chuck Taylors
2) Keg Beer
3) Barbeque
4) Short Notice and/or No Family.
5) Ceremony under 5 minutes (I think the shorter the more "cool" points you get)

What else can we add?

/Perpetually single
//Have been the "go to" Bachelor Party planning guy for about 15 years.
///My friend's wives hate me.


You see hipsters - what i see is an enjoyable experience: Beer, BBQ, the outdoors, an intimate event with friends and family where we spend less time wedding the happy couple and more time celebrating their new life.

/if liking Beer, BBQ and significantly less of my extended family around me makes me a hipster then looks like i pair of skinny jeans.
 
2012-10-05 03:56:00 PM
Okay Fark, what the???
 
2012-10-05 04:07:31 PM
Comedian Ed Byrne on weddings:

Part 1

Part 2
 
2012-10-05 04:16:39 PM
There's definitely reasons I'm still single. If you list all the reasons, no doubt many of them have to do with me.

However, the biggest non-me reason is the truly incalculable amounts of narcissism in many of today's "modern" females.

/expected to be flamed
//it's still f-ing true.
 
2012-10-05 04:19:00 PM

Big Man On Campus: However, the biggest non-me reason is the truly incalculable amounts of narcissism in many of today's "modern" females.

/expected to be flamed
//it's still f-ing true.


Meh. I personally blame Disney and Romantic Comedies.
 
2012-10-05 04:20:17 PM

Expolaris: The ceremony is going to look great in their gazebo (if we can defeat it).


I lol'd :)
 
2012-10-05 04:27:17 PM

Expolaris: Pray 4 Mojo: I never knew there were wedding hipsters... let's see:

1) Chuck Taylors
2) Keg Beer
3) Barbeque
4) Short Notice and/or No Family.
5) Ceremony under 5 minutes (I think the shorter the more "cool" points you get)

What else can we add?

/Perpetually single
//Have been the "go to" Bachelor Party planning guy for about 15 years.
///My friend's wives hate me.

You see hipsters - what i see is an enjoyable experience: Beer, BBQ, the outdoors, an intimate event with friends and family where we spend less time wedding the happy couple and more time celebrating their new life.

/if liking Beer, BBQ and significantly less of my extended family around me makes me a hipster then looks like i pair of skinny jeans.


Just poking a little fun at all the "We had an awesome anti-trendy wedding" comments... that are all pretty much still the same trend. Hell... I'm so cool that I didn't even get married and still got the shiat kicked out of me, lost my house and most of my stuff. THAT'S cool!

Big, small, casual, formal... whatever... it's always a good party. Do whatever makes you happy. Me... I like blackjack and hookers. When I have my blackjack and hooker wedding... I'll tell ya'll about it.
 
2012-10-05 04:31:17 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: Expolaris: Pray 4 Mojo: I never knew there were wedding hipsters... let's see:

1) Chuck Taylors
2) Keg Beer
3) Barbeque
4) Short Notice and/or No Family.
5) Ceremony under 5 minutes (I think the shorter the more "cool" points you get)

What else can we add?

/Perpetually single
//Have been the "go to" Bachelor Party planning guy for about 15 years.
///My friend's wives hate me.

You see hipsters - what i see is an enjoyable experience: Beer, BBQ, the outdoors, an intimate event with friends and family where we spend less time wedding the happy couple and more time celebrating their new life.

/if liking Beer, BBQ and significantly less of my extended family around me makes me a hipster then looks like i pair of skinny jeans.

Just poking a little fun at all the "We had an awesome anti-trendy wedding" comments... that are all pretty much still the same trend. Hell... I'm so cool that I didn't even get married and still got the shiat kicked out of me, lost my house and most of my stuff. THAT'S cool!

Big, small, casual, formal... whatever... it's always a good party. Do whatever makes you happy. Me... I like blackjack and hookers. When I have my blackjack and hooker wedding... I'll tell ya'll about it.


No worries man, sorry for the misdirected ire!

and when you do have that hookers and blackjack wedding...do we have to pay for the blackjack....AND the hookers...or are both all covered as an expense of the wedding? I gotta know what to hit it , when to stick it, and when to quit it.
 
2012-10-05 04:31:57 PM

zabadu: 1981. I'm the one in polyester. Think the dress cost $80 at the time.
[imageshack.us image 720x479]


Was that picture taken before or after the two of you recorded "Dreamboat Annie"?
 
2012-10-05 04:32:35 PM

kiwimoogle84: Beanlet: KatjaMouse: cosmiquemuffin: - Pro photographer. We gave everyone a disposable camera (YES! it was a long time ago) and had them turn the cameras in at the end so we could cull through, pick the best and send them all out to the folks who came. This turned out okay, but certain "money shots" were not gotten.

I told my mom I just need her help to pay for the food and venue which doesn't have to be all that amazing and I'm flexible with the dress but the one thing I will not budge on is the photographer. I am willing drop 4 grand if I have to to get the best possible photos for this wedding because 30 years from now I want to look at those pictures and swoon, goddammit.

To anyone who is planning a wedding, this is awesome advice. I'm not sure about the 4 grand, I have no idea what it costs now.. but make sure your photog has a good reputation and isn't a sleazeball. My SIL (mentioned above, the one straight from hell) recommended this guy and he was such a pervert. He wanted me to do all kinds of porn star poses in my dress. I only wish I was kidding.

I had signed a contract with him for a certain amount which included photos of my choice, beautifully placed in a leatherbound album. When we got the proofs, he also sent an order form for single reprints, which we copied and brought around to family that were interested in having prints made. We spent a lot of time going through those proofs with different family members, getting everyone's orders ready. When I went to turn them in, he said nooo, we weren't able to choose our own photos, he was just showing us the proofs. He was going to choose the pics he thought were best. Oh and ordering more? no, that wasn't possible, we'd have to pay for a whole new package to do that. He ignored the fact that our single orders would have totalled out to more than the original packages that he offered.. And why on earth did he send the order forms for reprints? He said they were put in the box by mistake and weren't valid offers or prices.

I walked out with the proofs and never looked back. Thankfully, they don't have a stamp or anything else on them to prevent copies, but they do have texture, which makes copies look like we all have a horrible case of leprosy.

/knows of at least one pose he put me in that didn't show up in the proofs. I refused most of them, but a couple were cute suggestions, including that one. I'm sure he got a direct shot of my breasts, looking down my dress at an angle... and I'm sure he whacked off to it for years afterwards.

Oh god that's awful. My stepdad is a fairly skilled photographer so I just had him do mine, but if I go big for round two, my thought is to find someone who is trying to start a business. If I see their work and they're promising, likely they'll be less than half the cost of a regular pro since they're starting out.

I got my sister's wedding cake that way. That was my gift. My friend had been doing it from home for years and was talented with the fondant stuff that's all over cakes to make them pretty. I got a pro quality cake, designed just how my sister wanted it, for $100.


That's what i am doing. (using a start up) a kid from one of my college classes is starting a photog business and he is doing our engagement/family photos for free. If they turn out ok, he is my man.
 
2012-10-05 04:35:48 PM
I watched Bridezillas earlier today and the bride was crying because so few people showed up. Gee, i wonder why? she was like a three year old throwing tantrums and treating to beat everyone up the whole time. Then she got trashed and called the cops. What a magical day!
 
2012-10-05 04:36:26 PM

Saracuda: katerbug72: katerbug72:
It was a short relationship.....about twenty seconds. She left him on the grounds that he was an icky boy.

Does he like blondes? My daughter is available for wedding dates. :) 

[i7.photobucket.com image 563x799]">


So adorable! Love the curls! My boy is not fussy on who he holds hands with. ;)

Older women
fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net

Other boys (my hubs told me to never again put those shorts on him. It was 90 degrees out!)
fbcdn-sphotos-g-a.akamaihd.net
 
2012-10-05 04:43:00 PM

Expolaris: Big, small, casual, formal... whatever... it's always a good party. Do whatever makes you happy. Me... I like blackjack and hookers. When I have my blackjack and hooker wedding... I'll tell ya'll about it.

No worries man, sorry for the misdirected ire!

and when you do have that hookers and blackjack wedding...do we have to pay for the blackjack....AND the hookers...or are both all covered as an expense of the wedding? I gotta know what to hit it , when to stick it, and when to quit it.


Blackjack is on you... but we'll vary the table minimums. Hookers are free for guests... just remember to tip. Oh... and get there early.
 
2012-10-05 04:43:36 PM

KatjaMouse: Big Man On Campus: However, the biggest non-me reason is the truly incalculable amounts of narcissism in many of today's "modern" females.

/expected to be flamed
//it's still f-ing true.

Meh. I personally blame Disney and Romantic Comedies.


That's a very easy target, but I hate Disney for other reasons, so I want to leave them out of this one.

I do, however, blame American fathers in general for treating their daughters as if they're some kind of trophy that is kept in a garage, never required to look after itself, always doted on, had money thrown at it whenever it needed it, and ignored as soon as it's been properly seen.
 
2012-10-05 04:55:02 PM

Big Man On Campus: KatjaMouse: Big Man On Campus: However, the biggest non-me reason is the truly incalculable amounts of narcissism in many of today's "modern" females.

/expected to be flamed
//it's still f-ing true.

Meh. I personally blame Disney and Romantic Comedies.

That's a very easy target, but I hate Disney for other reasons, so I want to leave them out of this one.

I do, however, blame American fathers in general for treating their daughters as if they're some kind of trophy that is kept in a garage, never required to look after itself, always doted on, had money thrown at it whenever it needed it, and ignored as soon as it's been properly seen.


Finger to nose.

Upper middle class Italian family... oldest daughter... then three sons. My dad didn't have sisters or female cousins/etc and had no clue how to handle having a girl. Gave her anything she wanted (including a $100k wedding).

She is still married, which is impressive, but she is an insufferable biatch... obviously. I feel bad for my BIL... but he volunteered.

/She is pushing 50 and my dad still buys her shiat.
//and has already claimed that she gets the house when my parents die.
///... because she "needs it more".
////Wanna come over for Christmas?
 
2012-10-05 04:59:01 PM

Pray 4 Mojo: /She is pushing 50 and my dad still buys her shiat.
//and has already claimed that she gets the house when my parents die.
///... because she "needs it more".
////Wanna come over for Christmas?


LOL.. that's all you had to say... agh, I shouldn't laugh... too close to home...
 
2012-10-05 05:10:05 PM
What a coont.

So glad I don't have friends like that!
 
2012-10-05 05:10:46 PM
The girls I know who got married let their bridesmaids run their hen (bachelorette) parties and generally ended up dressed as badgers,wearing hats decorated with buttplugs and smearing each other in hog fat.

This includes my wife. You guys are doing it all wrong.
 
2012-10-05 05:13:38 PM
My original rant had something to do with the Bridezilla, for anyone who cares.. but it got eaten by a screen refresh after I answered my phone (I hate typing on my phone on fark, it almost always gets eaten).

I feel for her friends, although I suspect that many of them are the same way. You watch the Bridezilla shows and you can see many are just as bad. People like that attract people who are equally obnoxious. It reminded me of one of the first Cake Boss episodes. If any of you have seen that, it was in the first season and very memorable. I recently played it for my mother, because describing it wasn't believable. The episide may have been faked, the woman was just that over the top crazy.

The bride and her mother go into the shop and Buddy sits down with them. The bride is disinterested and keeps saying she doesn't give a crap what the cake looks like, it's her mother's idea. The mother apologizes, tries to tell him what she wants.. Buddy makes a few suggestions, the bride grimaces, saying how horrible that idea is, she wants this and that, but it really doesn't matter, she doesn't even want the wedding, it's all her mother's idea, yada yada.

The bride comes to see the cake he's made, which is a very simple, white cake. She starts putting colored frosting all over it, destroying the cake, saying she told him that she wanted color in her cake. Because there are cuts in the scene and the frosting seems to magically move around, it seems like it's been set up.

In the end, he delivers a (in my opinion) gaudy colored cake and she won't even look at it, she won't come out of the room. Her bridesmaids are all looking embarrassed, the mother apologizes.

The whole time, all I could think of was that her fiance should RUN, FORREST, RUN!
 
2012-10-05 05:14:18 PM

Pert: The girls I know who got married let their bridesmaids run their hen (bachelorette) parties and generally ended up dressed as badgers,wearing hats decorated with buttplugs and smearing each other in hog fat.

This includes my wife. You guys are doing it all wrong.


You must be Canadian.
 
2012-10-05 05:19:14 PM
And another thing. my wife and I paid for bridesmaid's dresses and hiring suits etc for all the key people at our wedding. why would you expect someone to pay to come to your wedding?
 
2012-10-05 05:24:56 PM
Hey, that one was pretty good. A Vail Wedding - well there can only be so many on Aug 31st - I'll have to watch out for this. A few thoughts:

1. Sorority Girl - no doubt. 10 TEN 10 Bridesmaids? Great, now they have to come up with 10 GUYS? Frat boy.

2. Vail and Vegas: Well, at least she's got expensive tastes.

3. "Been dreaming if this all my life since I can Remember" OH, good forking luck there, Princess. No wedding ever, and I mean EVER went off without a hitch...you will forget the Swans or something. Get used to it, get flexible.

4. Spending so much of your Daddies money might be fun, but really, on a starter wedding? Hope he's not pissed when you are divorced in 5 years.


Been to a lot of weddings. Most of them lasted pretty well, all of them were unpretentious, and fun, and not stuffy.

We blew what I thought was a wad on our wedding, $10K of our own money (hey, we were in our 40's) - because we knew that given the age of many of our relatives, it would be the last time we would see some of them and we wanted to be able to invite everyone important. We also spluged on a big band instead of an Ipod for music and that was the best $2,500 I ever spent, they were the absolute hit of the wedding. Also to minimize stress, we hired out all the work we possibly could.

Of course, some women think "Father of the Bride" is an instruction manual, not a cautionary tale.
 
2012-10-05 05:30:15 PM

BrynnMacFlynn: vonapathy: honey, you're not ready to get married.

Why, because I admit that I still love the idea of being proposed to? OH NOES.

/sweetheart, don't be hatin'


I think the words she bolded were something about not wanting to give up the princess fantasy, and a main theme of this thread has been that a marriage partnership has little to do with being a princess.
 
2012-10-05 05:30:53 PM
1981. I'm the one in polyester. Think the dress cost $80 at the time.
imageshack.us

KatjaMouse: Beanlet: To anyone who is planning a wedding, this is awesome advice. I'm not sure about the 4 grand, I have no idea what it costs now.. but make sure your photog has a good reputation and isn't a sleazeball. My SIL (mentioned above, the one straight from hell) recommended this guy and he was such a pervert. He wanted me to do all kinds of porn star poses in my dress. I only wish I was kidding.

I fell in love with a photographer I met at a bridal expo last month. A bride believed so much in her work that she drove out from Pennsylvania with her own wedding album to help run her booth. And she didn't have just a dozen photos on display, she had almost 100 plus that bride's own album which was just shot after shot of amazing. And on top of that this chick is fun. She even did this fun zombie engagement session:

[sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net image 310x206][sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 310x206][sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 310x206]

And my sister told me that she wants to do a vintage pin-up photo session with this woman as my Bachlorette party.


God, I hate this trend.

aphyd: zabadu: 1981. I'm the one in polyester. Think the dress cost $80 at the time.
[imageshack.us image 720x479]

Was that picture taken before or after the two of you recorded "Dreamboat Annie"?


Actually, during. It was a long summer with Ann.
 
2012-10-05 05:31:28 PM
WTF does it keep posting the picture??????????
 
2012-10-05 05:33:04 PM

Pert: And another thing. my wife and I paid for bridesmaid's dresses and hiring suits etc for all the key people at our wedding. why would you expect someone to pay to come to your wedding?


www.eonline.com
 
2012-10-05 05:49:22 PM
Late to the party, as usual.

I have performed ceremonies for brides like this. In spite of my most earnest counseling I was told, by one such bride: "seriously Rev., you're not a girl, you just don't know the pressures we are under" (yes, a bride did say that to me). The longest any of those marriages lasted was 18 months; all the rest ended in less than a year.
 
2012-10-05 05:51:36 PM

OneNightStand: Late to the party, as usual.

I have performed ceremonies for brides like this. In spite of my most earnest counseling I was told, by one such bride: "seriously Rev., you're not a girl, you just don't know the pressures we are under" (yes, a bride did say that to me). The longest any of those marriages lasted was 18 months; all the rest ended in less than a year.


Perhaps you should have enlightened them on your other counseling sessions. Perhaps mention some of the ones where you've dealt with violent alcoholics. Also, don't forget any outright criminals you've counseled.
 
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