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10278 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Oct 2012 at 9:33 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:    more»

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PallMall: iron_city_ap: A football field sized crop of weed is worth \$10 million !?

You're obviously not familiar with CopMath™

Here's a quick lesson:

1. Latrell gets caught with one (1) ounce of dirt weed. You take the actual value (\$50) and multiply that by 100. So, \$50*100 = \$5,000. Then, you double that amount because Latrell is a dirty, sub-human negro.. who probably robs and kills people all day. So, \$5,000*2 = \$10,000. This ensures a long prison sentence for Latrell, and you (the cop) get an award for taking both a filthy criminal and dangerous addictive narcotics off of the street.

2. Shane gets pulled over for his license plate light being out (in broad daylight). He's driving a Hyundai, so he can't be rich, but when you (the cop) smell something, you decide to search Shane's car and find \$10,000 in cash. You plant a 2mg Xanax (School Bus/Totem Pole/Whatever the kids call them these days) on his floorboard so you have probable cause to arrest him. Because he is now in custody, you immediately divide the cash by two. So, \$10,000/2 = \$5,000 (hint: you take the \$5k for yourself). When the backup cruiser arrives, you subtract 80% of the remaining \$5k to cover your co-workers (other cops). So, \$5,000-80% = \$1,000. Because the cash was initially found in a Ziploc™ bag, you slap a distribution charge on Shane as well (that will show him). You then get an award for getting a drug peddling criminal and dangerous drug money off of the street. As a bonus, you get to impound his Hyundai, which will be auctioned off to bring in more revenue for your brothers in blue.

You forgot to carry the 1.

TheEdibleSnuggie: You forgot to carry the 1.

That's in the advanced CopMath™ tutorial.

Locavore.

max_pooper: This needs to happen more often. Pot growers need to plant that shiat everywhere. Every public park, every roadside ditch, every vacant lot, every courthouse flowerbed. Overwhelm the authorities with so much wild weed that they couldn't possibly destroy all of it.

\Prohibition needs to end
\\Not a pot smoker

Johnny Potseed?

Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: santadog: 10 Million... for 1500 plants.

Well, to be fair, they DID say "up to 10 million". So, pretty much any dollar amount under that is still accurate.

Also, this is 2012. Can we please stop using the football field as a unit of measurement? It's embarrassing.

A metric fan, eh? I'm guessing you must prefer hectares for these measurements...

Perhaps posting the conversion rate will make it easier for people to shift away from using football fields:

1 football field = 0.535 hectares

1 hectare = 1.86915887850467 football fields

Sam Hurd?

Girion47: bhcompy: Egoy3k: bhcompy: like beer snobs, pot snobs make up a small percentage of the pot smoking population

You don't know many pot smokers do you?

I know plenty. They're called poor high school and college students.

The pot smokers I know are successful and employed in careers with 6 figure incomes.

Ayup.

Rickenbacker: Putting aside all the "legalize it" talk...I've never understood the "cut it down NOW" approach. Wouldn't it have made more sense to put the field under surveillance, and catch the grower(s)? Seems that would work better than cutting it all down, and hoping for snitches to provide tips.

Someone just missed this month's "don't report my grow-op" payment. That's all. If you send him to jail you will never get next month's money.

Leeds: Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: santadog: 10 Million... for 1500 plants.

Well, to be fair, they DID say "up to 10 million". So, pretty much any dollar amount under that is still accurate.

Also, this is 2012. Can we please stop using the football field as a unit of measurement? It's embarrassing.

A metric fan, eh? I'm guessing you must prefer hectares for these measurements...

Perhaps posting the conversion rate will make it easier for people to shift away from using football fields:

1 football field = 0.535 hectares

1 hectare = 1.86915887850467 football fields

Is hectare the word for soccer field?

PallMall: TheEdibleSnuggie: You forgot to carry the 1.

That's in the advanced CopMath™ tutorial.

Then that would be CopMath™ v. 2.0 - FBI Edition!

Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: santadog: 10 Million... for 1500 plants.

Well, to be fair, they DID say "up to 10 million". So, pretty much any dollar amount under that is still accurate.

Also, this is 2012. Can we please stop using the football field as a unit of measurement? It's embarrassing.

Yes, why would we want to use a measurement that pretty much every American can immediately visualize? We should switch to giving area estimates in hectares immediately!

Hmmm... Chicago is Obama territory...

NSFW

On the next episode of "Boss":

Mayor Kane has a groovy time, maaaaaan.

bhcompy: Pretty common here out west. If there's public or private land that can hide something with natural geography or a tree line buildup or something else you can bet that someone is going to try to grow marijuana in it. Of course, you get people like the ones in this thread that talk about how marijuana didn't kill anyone and prohibition is bad, but I'm not sure they understand that when it's legal and commercialized the Mexican Mafia is still going to want theirs, still can provide the best price(like beer snobs, pot snobs make up a small percentage of the pot smoking population), and will still kill people over marijuana.

I know really, its like what we have now with those horrible budwieser vs coors turf wars, when will they stop the violence!

AbbeySomeone: Marijuana (blah blah) street violence?

Oh for crissake.
Mr.S and I are both voting to legalize this sh*t and neither one of us are pot smokers. Leave them alone and spend the time, money and effort to close down the dangerous people. A meth house can destroy a neighborhood.

When it explodes!

♪ Well the South side of Chicago
Is the baddest part of town
And if you go down there
You better just beware
Of some smoke named Ditchweed Brown ♪

signaljammer: Cannabis seems to originate from Nepal.

The actual research I have read find it distributed world wide and cultivated/prized by humans for all of recorded history.
Can we just end this nonsense soon?

Out of work at 3:30
Home at 4:00
Let the dogs out 4:01
check house for doggy accidents 4:02
Let the dogs in 4:07
Give treats, meds and food to dogs 4:07.01
Check messages 4:10
check snail mail 4:14
Change out of work clothes 4:17
Burn one 4:20
Get out harmonicas. Try to jam along with Wille and Waylon 4:22
Look at laptop, think about porn. 4:59
Continue perpetual bathroom remodeling 6:00
Burn anotha? 6:20
Something Netflix something something 7:00
Sleep like a baby without the drooling 10:00

Totally unproductive day.

drjekel_mrhyde
Dirt weed.
/Use to walk pass a patch in highschool

Past. Are you sure you kept going?

jk

Mr.Bobo: Hmmm... Chicago is Obama territory...

[fc00.deviantart.net image 600x400]

NSFW

The bad thing is by the time it's legal nation wide my wife will be to old to take nudies in a pot field, she's only got about 5 or 10 years left without seeing a nip/tuck guy. :(
Guess I can just ignore that one on my bucket list.

ManateeGag: Is that going to be enough to forget about how much the Cubs suck?

South side = White Sox

rudemix: Should have set the whole field on fire and blown it over the city.

I'm okay with this.

max_pooper: This needs to happen more often. Pot growers need to plant that shiat everywhere. Every public park, every roadside ditch, every vacant lot, every courthouse flowerbed.
\\Not a pot smoker

I never understood why this didn't happen more often. I mean you don't smoke the seeds right? If you plant the seeds in random unused spots some will make it. Hell, if you only get 10% to full maturity it was 10% that took very little effort to produce and you don't have to pay for. If you are not paying for your pot then you are not supporting criminal enterprise. Hell, growing for your own consumption might just be one of the easiest ways to combat the funding of dangerous criminal organizations that currently are responsible for the danger associated with the pot trade.

also,
\Prohibition needs to end
\\Not a pot smoker
\\\Holy cow I'm a liberal
\\\\If your gonna consume, get a vaporizer

Why don't we just legalize this stuff in California, and send all the stoners there?

/oblig

Krymson Tyde: Look how far north the growth zone is moving. Pretty soon they'll be growing Mexican ditch weed in Kansas.

They've been doing that for at least 40 years. In Eastern Kansas, at least.

I should have used "at least" one or two more times there.

Sybarite: Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: santadog: 10 Million... for 1500 plants.

Well, to be fair, they DID say "up to 10 million". So, pretty much any dollar amount under that is still accurate.

Also, this is 2012. Can we please stop using the football field as a unit of measurement? It's embarrassing.

Yes, why would we want to use a measurement that pretty much every American can immediately visualize? We should switch to giving area estimates in hectares immediately!

The funny thing is in Europe they would probably also say two football fields to describe the size also instead of using hectares also.

Ima_Lurker: Leeds: Pelvic Splanchnic Ganglion: santadog: 10 Million... for 1500 plants.

Well, to be fair, they DID say "up to 10 million". So, pretty much any dollar amount under that is still accurate.

Also, this is 2012. Can we please stop using the football field as a unit of measurement? It's embarrassing.

A metric fan, eh? I'm guessing you must prefer hectares for these measurements...

Perhaps posting the conversion rate will make it easier for people to shift away from using football fields:

1 football field = 0.535 hectares

1 hectare = 1.86915887850467 football fields

Is hectare the word for soccer field?

Hectare was the farmers name.

swahnhennessy: I should have used "at least" one or two more times there.

That's the least you can do?

You watch, someone is going to genetically engineer a sub-zero temperature tolerant cannabis plant and NASA will seed Mars. In 10 years a bunch of that CO-2 will be 0-2 and 0-3. Heaven.

It'll be a one way ticket, but meh, we'll miss the coming Apocalypse.

Oh, that guy.

If they legalize Marijuana how many Cops, DEA, Prison Guards, Lawyers and other law enforcement types will loose their cushy jobs and hefty retirements let alone the unions political funding? Give the taxpayers a freaking break. We're tired of being financially raped by these people.

bikerbob: If they legalize Marijuana how many Cops, DEA, Prison Guards, Lawyers and other law enforcement types will loose their cushy jobs and hefty retirements let alone the unions political funding? Give the taxpayers a freaking break. We're tired of being financially raped by these people.

Who gives a shiat. I don't want my tax dollars being paid for those thugs to propagate more little shiat-head thugs. I know a few cops kids, just as farking stupid as their parents.

Zeb Hesselgresser: You watch, someone is going to genetically engineer a sub-zero temperature tolerant cannabis plant and NASA will seed Mars. In 10 years a bunch of that CO-2 will be 0-2 and 0-3. Heaven.

What a great idea for terraforming Mars. If we find out there's no current life or fragile artifacts of a failed civilization there, we should definitely do that.

/love the fact that I can google "taint corn" and this is the first hit

URAPNIS: How stupid is it that one can be arrested for growing a plant.

I should get the death sentence for these habaneros

I'm no expert here, and the picture isn't that great, but that crop doesn't look "just days before harvest" to me.

/maybe I'm just too used to all the pretty pictures that show up here on Fark
//my horticulture skills suck
///even air plants die on me

ultraholland: URAPNIS: How stupid is it that one can be arrested for growing a plant.

I known, right? What's next, jail for drawing a cartoon or making stupid you-tube videos?

bhcompy: when it's legal and commercialized the Mexican Mafia is still going to want theirs, still can provide the best price

are you smoking bath salts?

once legalized the best price will be from altria (phillip morris) and diageo guinness.

they already have the infrastructure and experience in distributing and securing such products, they will be in the tobacco case right next to the cigs and in the liquor stores behind the counter

santadog: 10 Million... for 1500 plants.

it's cop math.

That works out to \$6.7k per plant, because everyone knows you get 2 pounds per plant.

sodomizer: Why don't we just legalize this stuff in California, and send all the stoners there?

because Money!???

drayno76: bikerbob: If
I know a few cops kids, just as farking stupid as their parents.

I know a few non cops kids that are as stupid as their non-cop parents.
AND
I know a few police officers kids who are as normal as their normal parents. In fact, their are a couple of those families that are quite nice people.

Maybe you need to meet more police officers and their families.

Morons. That's obviously just a bunch of feral feminized hemp clones.

IAMTHEINTARWEBS: drayno76: bikerbob: If
I know a few cops kids, just as farking stupid as their parents.

I know a few non cops kids that are as stupid as their non-cop parents.
AND
I know a few police officers kids who are as normal as their normal parents. In fact, their are a couple of those families that are quite nice people.

Maybe you need to meet more police officers and their families.

So are you suggesting that absolute power doesn't always corrupt, or are you just pretending that good cops exist?

swahnhennessy: I should have used "at least" one or two more times there.

At least.

The problem is that the culture of law enforcement is that officers of the law, prosecutors and our so-called "leaders" take any transgression of their precious "rules" personally, and that this are an insult that requires vengeance.

Rather than setting up a system to treat the root cause of problems and to REDUCE HARM, the system is set up to (1) satisfy these rule makers that revenge has been dealt to the perpetrator (the more out-of-proportion the better!) and (2) to perpetuate the situation by preventing treatment of root causes.

Since most people who vote are not critical thinkers, they are perfectly ok with this cave-man attitude. Even though it costs everyone in the long run and is totally inhumane. So we are stuck with it.

Cheech AND Chong - not available for comment. Rumoured to be in mourning...

GAT_00:
"Civilized" corporations have open wars too. They just don't have them here, they have them in the 3rd world.

Exactly. The south side of Chicago.

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