If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Salt Lake Tribune)   I fought the law (by declaring myself the president of a sovereign nation bound only by English common laws and filing billion-dollar legal claims against the feds), and the law won   (sltrib.com) divider line 29
    More: Amusing, State Of Louisiana, Louisiana Man, Utah, paper terrorism, Utah County, tax fraud, juvenile courts, federal judges  
•       •       •

11349 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Oct 2012 at 4:23 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-10-03 05:36:45 PM
3 votes:

Tax Boy: According to Miller, only nouns have legal authority.


"Detain him"
"Demolish that structure"
"Confiscate those papers"
"Hold you in contempt"

Hmm, looks like lots of verbs with authority to me.
2012-10-03 05:11:22 PM
3 votes:
My two favorite claims that sovereign citizens make are where they say they can take over a courtroom when the judge leaves by storming the bench and yelling "The captain has abandoned ship!" and therefore have full authority, and that they say that when handed a receipt if you write the correct magic words (cant recall what they are right now) on it at a 45 degree angle then it's automagically paid off by your secret government account that if you didn't use the government would get to use as collateral for a loan or something.

These guys are nuts.
2012-10-03 02:02:32 PM
3 votes:
www.daviscountyutah.gov

Now they're never going to let him host the Golden Globes again.
2012-10-03 06:18:22 PM
2 votes:

JohnnyC: 6. That rocks and magnets under his pillow will protect him from EMF.


Unbelievable.
2012-10-03 05:16:04 PM
2 votes:
In 2006, Hemet, California physician Jerome Mueller was jailed for tax evasion: "Part of a loose-knit group calling themselves 'freemen' and 'patriots,' Mueller is an adherent of 'truth language.' Developed by self-professed genius David Wynn Miller, of Milwaukee, truth language is based on mathematics and purports to be the only correct way of interpreting English. A major tenet, according to interviews with Miller published on the Internet, is that maritime law is the only worldwide governing authority because the Earth is a vessel in a sea of space. The U.S. government, however, contends in everyday English that Mueller owes income taxes back to 1993." 

i.imgur.com
2012-10-03 04:59:09 PM
2 votes:

turbocucumber: :David-Wynn: Miller is still one of the funniest of the lot.

QUANTUM-LANGUAGE-PARSE-SYNTAX-GRAMMAR FTW


Oh god this guy.

Many years ago, I represented the United States in a tax case brought by one of his "students" and the complaint was written in that crazy-ass style all in caps with colons everywhere and numbers hand-written over each word that (I guess) meant something "important" to these people.

So I filed a motion to dismiss. It began with "Plaintiff has got to be joking."
2012-10-03 04:41:35 PM
2 votes:
nobody yet?

cartoonsparajovenes.files.wordpress.com
2012-10-03 04:33:12 PM
2 votes:

Magorn: This is what I never understood about these "sovereign citizen" nutballs (and their African-American counterparts the "Moorish Constitution" wierdos) First how can they possibly believe that the law works like this? That if they simply say some magic words they can not be bound by the rules all the other suckers in the world are following?


They buy books and/or read web sites telling them they can do exactly this, and it sounds plausible, so they try it out. They succeed what the article calls "paper terrorism" by tying up the legal system with useless claims, thinking they can outlast the government's lawyers. This is because they don't know anything about lawyers.
2012-10-03 04:19:31 PM
2 votes:
Might want to taze him, just to be sure.
2012-10-03 02:36:31 PM
2 votes:
P Barnes is still not amused.
2012-10-03 06:52:50 PM
1 votes:

silly season: JohnnyC: I know a guy who is all into that nonsense. He believes a lot of stupid things though... examples:

1. Planes leave "Chem-Trails" in some vast conspiracy for no apparent reason.
2. Hollywood actresses are all sex slaves.
3. That he can pay any bill by writing "Accepted for value" on it.
4. UFO's are not only visiting us, but doing so on a regular basis.
5. Cancer is cured by eating specific diets.
6. That rocks and magnets under his pillow will protect him from EMF.
7. Perpetual motion machines exist and "they" are just keeping the machines secret.

He listens to a lot of "American Freedom Radio",,, his brain is broken. Generally a pretty nice guy... just believes a lot of crazy stuff.

That's... an interesting take on things.

/Dibs on Jessica Alba!



I would think that all the A-list actresses would have a waiting list a mile long. Better to go for some smoking-hot, relatively-unknown "C-lister" - after all, it's not her acting talent you're interested in.
2012-10-03 06:15:25 PM
1 votes:
I know a guy who is all into that nonsense. He believes a lot of stupid things though... examples:

1. Planes leave "Chem-Trails" in some vast conspiracy for no apparent reason.
2. Hollywood actresses are all sex slaves.
3. That he can pay any bill by writing "Accepted for value" on it.
4. UFO's are not only visiting us, but doing so on a regular basis.
5. Cancer is cured by eating specific diets.
6. That rocks and magnets under his pillow will protect him from EMF.
7. Perpetual motion machines exist and "they" are just keeping the machines secret.

He listens to a lot of "American Freedom Radio",,, his brain is broken. Generally a pretty nice guy... just believes a lot of crazy stuff.
2012-10-03 06:12:25 PM
1 votes:

Cyno01: Why are these sovereign citizen assholes, who typically deify the founding fathers (the parts they like anyway), always all about english common law? Didnt their heroes fight a war about that?


The revolution notwithstanding, we actually did adapt a lot of English ideas, customs and laws into our own. See the Magna Carta, English common law, the writings of Locke and Hobbs, and Blackstone's "Commentaries on the Laws of England" as some examples.
2012-10-03 06:00:12 PM
1 votes:
I remember seeing one of these letters years ago when I first started my current job with the state. Everyone in my department laughed about it. We didn't realize it was an entire movement; we just thought the guy was crazy and sent him some standard No-not-yours form letter in response.
2012-10-03 05:37:58 PM
1 votes:

Mr. Coffee Nerves: So these guys are pretty much like people who play Dungeons and Dragons going into town and demanding as a 24th level Elf Druid with Dragon Pants that all the maidens fair be brought to him for nether inspection?


That would be Epic!
2012-10-03 05:20:37 PM
1 votes:

Magorn: This is what I never understood about these "sovereign citizen" nutballs (and their African-American counterparts the "Moorish Constitution" wierdos) First how can they possibly believe that the law works like this? That if they simply say some magic words they can not be bound by the rules all the other suckers in the world are following?


My theory is that it comes from playing too much Mao as a child. You can never be sure you know all the rules, or that anyone else you're playing with does either, so eventually you learn to make crap up.

Second, who who ever want to live in a world that lives like that? Where any right they think they have, or any contract they think they've agreed to could be voided simply because the other side crosses their fingers and says "Mxyzptlk" in a room where a flag with a yellow fringe border is hung or some damn thing?

I'm forced to admit that being able to play Calvinball with the law actually does sound kind of fun. I'm not saying it's worth the ramifications, of course, but it might be fun to dream about once in a while.
2012-10-03 05:18:20 PM
1 votes:
"notice of international commercial claim in admiralty administrative remedy,"

I know what all those words mean, but that quote makes no sense.
2012-10-03 05:08:49 PM
1 votes:

Corvus: Tax Boy: turbocucumber: :David-Wynn: Miller is still one of the funniest of the lot.

QUANTUM-LANGUAGE-PARSE-SYNTAX-GRAMMAR FTW

Oh god this guy.

Many years ago, I represented the United States in a tax case brought by one of his "students" and the complaint was written in that crazy-ass style all in caps with colons everywhere and numbers hand-written over each word that (I guess) meant something "important" to these people.

So I filed a motion to dismiss. It began with "Plaintiff has got to be joking."

HA!

So they wrote something that it looked like Charley Manson would write? Because colons and brackets somehow make you no longer an American citizen.


Hey he's wikipedia-worthy:

Miller lived in Ohio before moving to Milwaukee, Wisconsin, and he describes himself as a "Plenipotentiary-Judge", an ambassador, banker, postmaster,[10] King of Hawaii, and a genius.[11][12][13]
On April 6, 1988, Miller invented what he calls the Mathematical Interface for Language or Quantum-Math-Communications and Language[14] or Correct-Language.[15] According to Miller, his language is "for the stopping-claims of the Theft, Cheating, Fraud, Slavery and War."[14] Miller's language uses sentences that begin with prepositional phrases, using the word For, are at least thirteen words long, and have many more nouns than verbs. According to Miller, only nouns have legal authority. The language has an abundance of punctuation. Miller explains:

FOR THE FORMS OF OUR PUNCTUATIONS ARE WITH THE CLAIM OF THE USE: FULL-COLON=POSITION-LODIO-FACTS, HYPHEN=COMPOUND-FACTS =KNOWN, PERIOD=END-THOUGHT, COMMA-PAUSE, AND LOCATION-TILDES WITH THE MEANINGS AND USES OF THE COMMUNICATIONS WITH THE FULL-COLON OF THE POSITION-LODIAL-FACT-PHRASE WITH THE FACT/KNOWN-TERM OF THE POSITIONAL-LODIO-FACT-PHRASE AND WITH THE VOID OF THE NOM-DE-GUERRE = DEAD-PERSON.[14]

According to Miller's teaching, the addition of hyphens and colons to one's name turns one from an ordinary, taxable human into a non-taxable "prepositional phrase." They are distinguished from the names listed at birth in all capital letters (as on a birth certificate), which he claims turns one into a taxable Person (Corporation). (e.g., DAVID WYNN MILLER as opposed to :David-Wynn: Miller.)."[16]
2012-10-03 04:55:58 PM
1 votes:
FTA: A Louisiana man described as the "brains" behind an alleged sovereign citizenship scheme that attempted to saddle state court judges and other authorities with billion-dollar debt claims will remain jailed in Utah until his trial.

Ok that made me LOL.
2012-10-03 04:54:16 PM
1 votes:

blazemongr: Magorn: This is what I never understood about these "sovereign citizen" nutballs (and their African-American counterparts the "Moorish Constitution" wierdos) First how can they possibly believe that the law works like this? That if they simply say some magic words they can not be bound by the rules all the other suckers in the world are following?

They buy books and/or read web sites telling them they can do exactly this, and it sounds plausible, so they try it out. They succeed what the article calls "paper terrorism" by tying up the legal system with useless claims, thinking they can outlast the government's lawyers. This is because they don't know anything about lawyers.


It's magical thinking, writ large.

Take the same magical thinking that powers pseudoscience, and fundamentalist religion, and apply that to law and government.

Sovereign citizens are to law as "Dr." Jenny McCarthy is to medicine and TimeCube Guy is to Physics.

Of course, the thing is, it's not a new scam. Judges know about it. Prosecutors know about it. Government attorneys know about it. Cops know about it. I know plenty of judges that just LOVE to put the smack-down on "sovereign citizens" for willful ignorance of the law. Some guy pulling this stunt gets a collective facepalm from cops, lawyers and judges of realizing this is going to be long and annoying. . .but nobody is afraid of it because they all know he's going to lose in the long run.

You can't just make up some nonsense about a court being a military court because the US flag has a gold fringe, or that you can just "opt out" of government and taxes by filing some kind of public notice in the newspaper, or that income taxes are inherently illegal because the IRS isn't a lawful part of the government (or is banned under the Constitution, or is secretly an arm of the British Crown, ect.). . .and expect it to work.

I've heard lots of this wackiness, and it's never worked. At most it ties up the courts for a few years and harasses the hell out of innocent people, but every single time, eventually, the legitimate law wins and the "sovereign citizen" loses.
2012-10-03 04:50:17 PM
1 votes:

DamnYankees: The Sovereign Citizen movement is one of the three dumbest things in the history of thought.


They remind me of the sort of RPG player who's read the rulebook but who clearly doesn't understand it, and yet is so convinced of their correctness that they drag the game to a halt arguing their interpretation.
2012-10-03 04:50:10 PM
1 votes:
:David-Wynn: Miller is still one of the funniest of the lot.

QUANTUM-LANGUAGE-PARSE-SYNTAX-GRAMMAR FTW
2012-10-03 04:48:34 PM
1 votes:
"Sovereign citizens" being a euphemism for a mentally challenged tax dodging numbskull.
2012-10-03 04:37:55 PM
1 votes:

blazemongr: Magorn: This is what I never understood about these "sovereign citizen" nutballs (and their African-American counterparts the "Moorish Constitution" wierdos) First how can they possibly believe that the law works like this? That if they simply say some magic words they can not be bound by the rules all the other suckers in the world are following?

They buy books and/or read web sites telling them they can do exactly this, and it sounds plausible, so they try it out. They succeed what the article calls "paper terrorism" by tying up the legal system with useless claims, thinking they can outlast the government's lawyers. This is because they don't know anything about lawyers.


BECAUSE I AM SMART AND I HAVE FIGURED IT ALL OUT! LANGUISH IN SLAVERY YOU SHEEPLE!!!
2012-10-03 04:35:50 PM
1 votes:

BooBoo23: Might want to taze him, just to be sure.


www.nytmare.org
2012-10-03 03:44:56 PM
1 votes:
Looks like Emporer Norton is alive and well.
2012-10-03 03:44:06 PM
1 votes:
So these guys are pretty much like people who play Dungeons and Dragons going into town and demanding as a 24th level Elf Druid with Dragon Pants that all the maidens fair be brought to him for nether inspection?
2012-10-03 02:44:59 PM
1 votes:
The Sovereign Citizen movement is one of the three dumbest things in the history of thought.
2012-10-03 02:11:10 PM
1 votes:
This spring, Cecil sent certified letters to at least four judges and a commissioner demanding judgments be voided and property returned within three days or payment of either $3.2 billion or $804 billion.

So they used the services of a government that they do not recognize to try to sue same government.

Fark it. Drop 'em in Kazakhstan without their passports and see how that "Sovereignty" works out for them.
 
Displayed 29 of 29 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report