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(Buzzfeed)   Here it is, the official rules for tonight's Presidential Debate Drinking Game. Good luck, we're all counting on you   (buzzfeed.com) divider line 44
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16278 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Oct 2012 at 1:55 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-10-03 11:15:01 AM
11 votes:
Are there any UT folks out there that are able to convert the drinking game rules to butt chugging units?
2012-10-03 02:07:53 PM
10 votes:
I figure this is worth posting one more time, so here is part of tomorrow's transcript from the debate:

Jim Lehrer: You're in a desert, walking along in the sand, when all of a sudden you look down...
Mitt Romney: What desert?
Lehrer: It doesn't make any difference what desert, it's completely hypothetical. You look down and see a tortoise, Mitt. It's crawling toward you...
Romney: Tortoise? What's that?
Lehrer: [irritated by Mitt's interruptions] You know what a turtle is? Same thing.
Romney: I've never seen a turtle... But I understand what you mean.
Lehrer: You reach down and you flip the tortoise over on its back, Mitt.
Romney: Do you make up these questions, Mr. Lehrer? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Lehrer: The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Romney: [angry at the suggestion] What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Lehrer: I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Mitt?
[Mitt has become visibly shaken]
Lehrer: They're just questions, Mitt. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a debate, designed to judge your competency for the presidency... Shall we continue?
2012-10-03 02:24:15 PM
5 votes:
publikenemy:
FW:FW:FW:RE:FW:FW:FW:RE:FW: YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS!!!!
From: Dad
To: Fark


If you are an Obama lover, which most here are, then read this. If you still are after you read it, then I have no son/daughter...

Yes, he told us in advance what he planned to do. Few were listening.
The following is a narrative taken from a 2008 Sunday morning televised "Meet The Press'.
From Sunday's 07 Sept. 2008 11:48:04 EST, Televised "Meet the Press" THE THEN Senator Obama was asked about his stance on the American Flag.
General Bill Gann' USAF (ret.) asked Obama to explain WHY he doesn't follow protocol when the National Anthem is played.
The General stated to Obama that according to the United States Code, Title 36, Chapter 10, Sec. 171...
During rendition of the national anthem, when the flag is displayed, all present (except those in uniform) are expected to stand at attention facing the flag with the right hand over the heart. Or, at the very least, "Stand and Face It".
NOW GET THIS !!
'Senator Obama replied:
"As I've said about the flag pin, I don't want to be perceived as taking sides". "There are a lot of people in the world to whom the American flag is a symbol of oppression.." "The anthem itself conveys a war-like message. You know, the bombs bursting in air and all that sort of thing."
(ARE YOU READY FOR THIS???)
Obama continued: "The National Anthem should be 'swapped' for something less parochial and less bellicose. I like the song 'I'd Like To Teach the World To Sing'. If that were our anthem, then, I might salute it. In my opinion, we should consider reinventing our National Anthem as well as 'redesign' our Flag to better offer our enemies hope and love.It's my intention, if elected, to disarm America to the level of acceptance to our Middle East Brethren. If we, as a Nation of warring people, conduct ourselves like the nations of Islam, where peace prevails - - - perhaps a state or period of mutual accord could exist between our governments ......."
When I become President, I will seek a pact of agreement to end hostilities between those who have b ...


FTFY
2012-10-03 02:13:38 PM
4 votes:
If I were Romney I'd capitalize on that Chipotle lunch. He should let out these viciously stinky little farts throughout the entire debate, that viewers will be left wondering why Obama seems so disgusted with America,
2012-10-03 02:11:37 PM
4 votes:

phritz: I figure this is worth posting one more time, so here is part of tomorrow's transcript from the debate:

Jim Lehrer: You're in a desert, walking along in the sand, when all of a sudden you look down...
Mitt Romney: What desert?
Lehrer: It doesn't make any difference what desert, it's completely hypothetical. You look down and see a tortoise, Mitt. It's crawling toward you...
Romney: Tortoise? What's that?
Lehrer: [irritated by Mitt's interruptions] You know what a turtle is? Same thing.
Romney: I've never seen a turtle... But I understand what you mean.
Lehrer: You reach down and you flip the tortoise over on its back, Mitt.
Romney: Do you make up these questions, Mr. Lehrer? Or do they write 'em down for you?
Lehrer: The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not helping.
Romney: [angry at the suggestion] What do you mean, I'm not helping?
Lehrer: I mean: you're not helping! Why is that, Mitt?
[Mitt has become visibly shaken]
Lehrer: They're just questions, Mitt. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a debate, designed to judge your competency for the presidency... Shall we continue?


Lehrer: Describe in single words only the good things that come into your mind about... your gardener.
2012-10-03 02:57:39 PM
3 votes:
Any time Mitt Romney opens his big fat mouth, kick the goddamn TV square in the face.
2012-10-03 02:33:15 PM
3 votes:

publikenemy: HERPA DERPA DOO


Well, I was going to point out that you're completely full of shiat and link to the Snopes page about that particular example of retardation, but I see that I've been beat to the punch. So, instead, I shall post a picture of Honey Boo Boo as Jesus.
d2tq98mqfjyz2l.cloudfront.net
/hot
2012-10-03 02:30:03 PM
3 votes:

Dimensio: Are you attempting to "troll", or are you just willfully lying?


It's just another example of how desperate Obama is.

Need more, libulardo? Read this and weep:
Attempting to appeal to the widest possible demographic base as Election Day draws near, President Obama made a surprise campaign stop Monday to visit an infinite series of alternate universes that vibrate on a hyperdimensional plane different from the three spatial dimensions observable in our own universe.

Occupying an M-theory-postulated "brane," or multidimensional "membrane," of either 11 or 22 dimensions depending on the chirality of the observer, Obama urged any hypothetical sentient consciousnesses within that multiverse to vote for him in November, or in whatever analogous chronological period their version of space-time specifies as extant.

"I come here today to stress the importance of finishing the work we've started and moving our political discourse forward," said the president, his voice confident and assured despite its sound waves propagating in wildly divergent modes incompatibly different from that of his and our native universe, due to differences in the fundamental physical constants guiding the alternate existence in which he stood. "It's time we talked about the issues that truly matter to voters, and not just to a select few."
2012-10-03 02:21:04 PM
3 votes:
If you are an Obama lover, which most here are, then read this. If you still are after you read it, then you greatly suck...

Yes, he told us in advance what he planned to do. Few were listening.
The following is a narrative taken from a 2008 Sunday morning televised "Meet The Press'.
From Sunday's 07 Sept. 2008 11:48:04 EST, Televised "Meet the Press" THE THEN Senator Obama was asked about his stance on the American Flag.
General Bill Gann' USAF (ret.) asked Obama to explain WHY he doesn't follow protocol when the National Anthem is played.
The General stated to Obama that according to the United States Code, Title 36, Chapter 10, Sec. 171...
During rendition of the national anthem, when the flag is displayed, all present (except those in uniform) are expected to stand at attention facing the flag with the right hand over the heart. Or, at the very least, "Stand and Face It".
NOW GET THIS !!
'Senator Obama replied:
"As I've said about the flag pin, I don't want to be perceived as taking sides". "There are a lot of people in the world to whom the American flag is a symbol of oppression.." "The anthem itself conveys a war-like message. You know, the bombs bursting in air and all that sort of thing."
(ARE YOU READY FOR THIS???)
Obama continued: "The National Anthem should be 'swapped' for something less parochial and less bellicose. I like the song 'I'd Like To Teach the World To Sing'. If that were our anthem, then, I might salute it. In my opinion, we should consider reinventing our National Anthem as well as 'redesign' our Flag to better offer our enemies hope and love.It's my intention, if elected, to disarm America to the level of acceptance to our Middle East Brethren. If we, as a Nation of warring people, conduct ourselves like the nations of Islam, where peace prevails - - - perhaps a state or period of mutual accord could exist between our governments ......."
When I become President, I will seek a pact of agreement to end hostilities between those who have been at war or in a state of enmity, and a freedom from disquieting oppressive thoughts.We as a Nation, have placed upon the nations of Islam, an unfair injustice which is WHY my wife disrespects the Flag and she and I have attended several flag burning ceremonies in the past".
"Of course now, I have found myself about to become the President of the United States and I have put my hatred aside.
I will use my power to bring CHANGE to this Nation, and offer the people a new path. My wife and I look forward to becoming our Country's First black Family. Indeed, CHANGE is about to overwhelm the United States of America "

Yes, you read it right. These were HIS WORDS. If anyone else had uttered these words, it would sink them. I can't believe this man has duped so many people into voting for him, but go ahead, give him a second term so he has no election to worry about.. That's my PSA ..vote with caution
2012-10-03 02:07:53 PM
3 votes:

badLogic: serial_crusher: "If a candidate drinks water, 1 drink"

Well, since Rmoney is a robot his drink will most likely be Everclear. If he burbs and singes Jim Leher's eyebrows, you have to chug a pint of the same.


www.wbur.org

Bite my shiny Mormon ass!
2012-10-03 02:03:47 PM
3 votes:
I was planning on playing a game of Obamo during the debate

2.bp.blogspot.com
2012-10-03 02:01:08 PM
3 votes:
My liver read the drinking rules, put on a UFC mixed-martial arts glove and tapped out.
2012-10-03 03:29:05 PM
2 votes:
How has this not been posted yet?

From dahmers love zombie
The 2012 Presidential Debate Drinking Game - Semi-Official Fark.com rules

General rules: Use your drink of choice, but be careful. Analysis of this game suggests that an alcoholic coma is likely.

Topic: The Economy
Obama uses either the word "millionaires" or "billionaires": 1 sip
Obama uses the words "millionaires" AND "billionaires" in the same sentence: 2 sips
Romney uses the word "failed": 1 sip
Romney invokes Bain Capital as a reason to elect him: 2 sips, fire your manservant
Either candidate uses the term "middle-class": ½ a sip
Obama says "let me be clear": 1 sip any clear liquor
Romney invokes The Reagan: 2 sips, promptly forget how many sips you took, take 2 more
Either candidate claims that their tax plan will lower the deficit: one sip, yell "YOU LIE"
Either candidate mentions Social Security: Geritol shooter
Romney provides a single tax loophole that he intends to do away with: 3 sips
Romney provides more than one tax loophole that he intends to do away with: chug
Obama uses the term "Ryan Budget": 1 sip

Topic: Domestic Policy
Romney claims credit for RomneyCare: 2 sips
Obama gives Romney effusive credit and compliments for creating RomneyCare: 1 sip, laugh until you pass out and have to be treated in the ER
Romney mentions RomneyCare, but says it's a bad choice for the entire country: 1 sip, stare at TV in the "confused dog" pose
Obama uses the word "abortion": wash down RU-486 with drink
Romney says that corporations are people: 2 sips
Romney talks about government waste within sixty seconds of criticizing Obama for cutting the defense budget: 2 sips
Obama talks about government waste within sixty seconds of criticizing Romney for wanting to cut...unspecified stuff: 2 sips
Either candidate explicitly claims they want to completely get rid of any government program: 2 sips
Romney mentions the $700,000,000,000 in Medicare cuts: take one sip, spit it into another glass
Obama tries to explain the same Medicare cuts: start to take a sip, get bored


Topic: Foreign Policy (note: first debate is domestic policy only)
Romney uses Benjamin Netanyahu's nickname "Bibi": one sip, make "bibibibibibibibi" noise with finger and lips
Obama mentions Bin Laden: do a shooter, jump up, yell "BOOM! HEADSHOT!"
Romney says "apology tour": chug beer, boot on carpet, apologize to your host
Obama uses the term "Arab Spring": 1 sip
Romney uses the term "Arab Spring" without the words "Muslim Brotherhood" in the same sentence: 3 sips
Either candidate mentions China in a favorable light: 2 sips
Either candidate mentions China in an unfavorable light: ½ sip

Other:
Either candidate laughs out loud as the other candidate is answering a question: 2 sips
Either candidate smirks with a seriously smartass grin while the other candidate is answering a question: ½ sip
Either candidate mouths the word "no" during the other candidate's answer: 1 sip (limit of 5 per debate)
Moderator loses complete control of the debate: 1 sip
Either candidate completely ignores the question asked, goes to a memorized sound bite that they wanted to make sure they got on camera: 1 sip
Audience boos inappropriately: 1 sip

/ (thanks dahmers love zombie)
2012-10-03 03:08:00 PM
2 votes:
Drink every time candidates switch regional accents.
2012-10-03 02:42:05 PM
2 votes:
Every time Obama says "fair share", take a drink and cockpunch 47% of the liberals in the room.
2012-10-03 02:40:38 PM
2 votes:
Every time Obama says the words "my predecessor" drink a can of Bush Light until, like his predecessor, you too start sounding like English is not your first language.

Every time Romney mentions Ronald Reagan...drink a shot...of something as stiff and cold as the late president himself.

Every time Obama mentions Hillary Clinton...drink a shot of something as stiff and cold...as the Secretary of State Herself.

Every time Romney mentions those who are "dependent upon government, who believe that they are victims, who believe the government has a responsibility to care for them" drink something that is 47% alcohol ...then hope that Obamacare covers the cost of your stomach pumping.

Every time Obama mentions Michelle, drink something organic and healthy that will surely leave as bad a taste in your mouth as the last 4 years.

Every time Romney decries American's who avoid paying taxes... down so many fruity rum drinks you feel like you're in the Caymen Islands with his money.

Every time Obama uses the phrase "Let me be clear" drink a shot of something cloudy like Kaluha, Bailey's or a Lindsey Lohan urine sample.

Every Romney uses the words "job killing"...drink until you, yourself have done a good job killing enough brain cells to make this massive fuster cluck seem more funny than sad.
2012-10-03 02:21:57 PM
2 votes:
"Gosh" 1 drink

I think this should be extended to euphemistic swearing employed to show regular guy hood by a pussy who is afraid of the real words.

Romney the regular guy employs a whole slew of them - gosh, heck, for pete's sake, golly, darn, gee, ...

I think we should be alert for the more unusual ones such as "gee willikers", "Dangnabbit" and give them 2 drinks.
2012-10-03 02:06:25 PM
2 votes:
I think I'll just get high and pretend neither one of them will ever be president.
2012-10-03 01:16:12 PM
2 votes:
anytime a black or a mormon appears on TV, drink
2012-10-03 09:39:17 PM
1 votes:
Oh shiat, he said Solyndra! Draaaaank!
2012-10-03 09:37:37 PM
1 votes:
obama is looking like a blubbering idiot, imo
2012-10-03 09:11:17 PM
1 votes:

JudgeSmails: god Christ, Romney's head is gigantic


wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net

Nah, his face is just little
2012-10-03 09:07:56 PM
1 votes:
we can help, but not if you are (insert minority here)
2012-10-03 09:02:28 PM
1 votes:

HowDareYouCallMeAHoser: I'll also be having a drink of Mike's Harder every time the candidates get asked a stupid question.



You'll be dead half way through...
2012-10-03 05:18:59 PM
1 votes:
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net

I saw this one first and immediately though of Fark. Behold, here is a thread. However, I like this image better than TFA.

I might actually have watched the debate tonight, if this wasn't the opening night of the county fair.

/hot like the fury of an irate voter.
2012-10-03 03:44:58 PM
1 votes:
Alright I am in. I just called in drunk for the next week and put myself on the liver donation list.

/Check liver light is already on.
2012-10-03 03:40:27 PM
1 votes:
that's not a drinking game, that's a plan for alcohol poisoning.
2012-10-03 03:31:48 PM
1 votes:

Sofa King Smart: Debby7813: badLogic: serial_crusher: "If a candidate drinks water, 1 drink"

Who's verifying the contents of those bottles? If I had to argue with either one of those guys for an hour, I'd have something a lot stronger than water in my bottle.

Well, since Rmoney is a robot his drink will most likely be Everclear. If he burbs and singes Jim Leher's eyebrows, you have to chug a pint of the same.

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 850x637]

Silly; Mormons don't drink alcohol at all.
.

and yet they have no problem with profiting off of selling it in 'their' state.




imageshack.us


"Romney is a robot ... and robots drink alcohol ... but Romney is a Mormon and ... Mormons do ... not drink alcohol ... illogical ... illogical ... "
2012-10-03 03:18:36 PM
1 votes:
Does anyone actually play these drinking games? Or are they just an excuse to sound cool and cynical?
2012-10-03 03:11:01 PM
1 votes:
www.csmonitor.com

"...why are you asking me? Oh right..."
2012-10-03 03:02:07 PM
1 votes:

GentDirkly: If you watch the debate on PBS, you might see my face when they talk to a "room full of undecided voters" in Orlando. Yes, we are real people. Who have real trouble making up their minds!


Well, you're in Florida. Ya know, hanging chads and all...
2012-10-03 02:43:16 PM
1 votes:

Hoblit: For those of you in the 12 step program, you take a drink every time they ask Gary Johnson a question do not watch the damn thing.

2012-10-03 02:38:26 PM
1 votes:

Debby7813: badLogic: serial_crusher: "If a candidate drinks water, 1 drink"

Who's verifying the contents of those bottles? If I had to argue with either one of those guys for an hour, I'd have something a lot stronger than water in my bottle.

Well, since Rmoney is a robot his drink will most likely be Everclear. If he burbs and singes Jim Leher's eyebrows, you have to chug a pint of the same.

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 850x637]

Silly; Mormons don't drink alcohol at all.

/// his will be lemonade....


Mormons do drink -

Why do you have to take two Mormons fishing with you?

Because if you take just one, he will drink all your beer.
2012-10-03 02:37:50 PM
1 votes:

publikenemy: If you are an Obama lover, which most here are, then read this. If you still are after you read it, then you greatly suck...

Yes, he told us in advance what he planned to do. Few were listening.
The following is a narrative taken from a 2008 Sunday morning televised "Meet The Press'.
From Sunday's 07 Sept. 2008 11:48:04 EST, Televised "Meet the Press" THE THEN Senator Obama was asked about his stance on the American Flag.
General Bill Gann' USAF (ret.) asked Obama to explain WHY he doesn't follow protocol when the National Anthem is played.
The General stated to Obama that according to the United States Code, Title 36, Chapter 10, Sec. 171...
During rendition of the national anthem, when the flag is displayed, all present (except those in uniform) are expected to stand at attention facing the flag with the right hand over the heart. Or, at the very least, "Stand and Face It".
NOW GET THIS !!
'Senator Obama replied:
"As I've said about the flag pin, I don't want to be perceived as taking sides". "There are a lot of people in the world to whom the American flag is a symbol of oppression.." "The anthem itself conveys a war-like message. You know, the bombs bursting in air and all that sort of thing."
(ARE YOU READY FOR THIS???)
Obama continued: "The National Anthem should be 'swapped' for something less parochial and less bellicose. I like the song 'I'd Like To Teach the World To Sing'. If that were our anthem, then, I might salute it. In my opinion, we should consider reinventing our National Anthem as well as 'redesign' our Flag to better offer our enemies hope and love.It's my intention, if elected, to disarm America to the level of acceptance to our Middle East Brethren. If we, as a Nation of warring people, conduct ourselves like the nations of Islam, where peace prevails - - - perhaps a state or period of mutual accord could exist between our governments ......."
When I become President, I will seek a pact of agreement to end hostilities between those who have b ...


cdn.crooksandliars.com
2012-10-03 02:35:39 PM
1 votes:

publikenemy: I just removed the last bit of suspicion that I might have any intelligence.

2012-10-03 02:26:56 PM
1 votes:
i512.photobucket.com
2012-10-03 02:26:25 PM
1 votes:
Morman Presidential Debate Drinking Game:

Turn on debates.
Wait 2 hours.

TA-DA!
2012-10-03 02:22:14 PM
1 votes:
My liver needs a bailout.
2012-10-03 02:14:21 PM
1 votes:
For those of you in the 12 step program, you take a drink every time they ask Gary Johnson a question.
2012-10-03 02:13:26 PM
1 votes:
t1.gstatic.com
2012-10-03 02:10:34 PM
1 votes:
Thus far, based on conversations held at work today, I should already be in the hospital with alcohol poisoning.
2012-10-03 01:33:08 PM
1 votes:

serial_crusher: "If a candidate drinks water, 1 drink"

Who's verifying the contents of those bottles? If I had to argue with either one of those guys for an hour, I'd have something a lot stronger than water in my bottle.


Well, since Rmoney is a robot his drink will most likely be Everclear. If he burbs and singes Jim Leher's eyebrows, you have to chug a pint of the same.

3.bp.blogspot.com
2012-10-03 11:46:49 AM
1 votes:

Shostie: I still think there should only be one rule:

If a candidate actually answers a question instead of spouting off barely-related talking points, empty a bottle of booze.


fark that. If a candidate actually answers a question instead of spouting off talking points, I'd open the 17yo scotch.
2012-10-03 11:46:13 AM
1 votes:
They forgot "Make no mistake..."
 
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