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(Zero Hedge)   So how rich and powerful is Apple really? Well put it this way: Braeburn--the hedge fund they quietly created in 2006 to handle some of their financial dealings--is now worth $117 billion, making it the largest single investment fund in the world   (zerohedge.com) divider line 33
    More: Interesting, investment fund, Fast Forward, computer terminal, portfolio manager, mutual funds, Apple products, Douglas Adams, financial instruments  
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1334 clicks; posted to Business » on 03 Oct 2012 at 10:44 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



33 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2012-10-03 10:08:31 AM  
I prefer macouns over braeburns.

As a matter of fact, I think I'll have one right now.
 
2012-10-03 10:23:41 AM  
Money, is there nothing you can't do?
 
2012-10-03 10:41:57 AM  
Oh, hamburgers! I put all my money in fujis.
 
2012-10-03 10:45:55 AM  
I bet you Braeburn employees use windows hardware
 
2012-10-03 10:46:33 AM  
windows hardware?? really?? I should be shot at dawn, I meant windows machines.
 
2012-10-03 10:47:01 AM  
I lost a bundle when the Red Delicious market collapsed in '07. I've diversified into Oranges now, although it's tough to compare the two markets.
 
2012-10-03 10:50:40 AM  
Oh, it's Zero Hedge. Paranoia is not an investment.
 
2012-10-03 10:52:54 AM  
A corporation is now a person, without the disadvantages of being human. It will not die. It will continue to acquire resources until there are none left.
 
2012-10-03 10:54:04 AM  
What's that you say? A hedge fund with billions in start-up capital and Apple as a sugar daddy is worth more billions? No way!
 
2012-10-03 11:00:14 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: I lost a bundle when the Red Delicious market collapsed in '07. I've diversified into Oranges now, although it's tough to compare the two markets.


Feels your pain..
www.wearysloth.com
 
2012-10-03 11:10:18 AM  
All that money, yet Apple can't create a decent Maps app.
 
2012-10-03 11:15:00 AM  
The fund manager's reaction to the news:
s3.jspenguin.org
 
2012-10-03 11:39:01 AM  
Thanks for the sour persimmons, cousin.
 
2012-10-03 11:39:10 AM  

jspenguin: The fund manager's reaction to the news:
[s3.jspenguin.org image 212x300]


Came for this, leaving for AAAAAAAPPALOOSA!
 
2012-10-03 12:33:42 PM  

Bonkthat_Again: A corporation is now a person, without the disadvantages of being human. It will not die. It will continue to acquire resources until there are none left.


It also lacks a penis.
 
2012-10-03 12:44:04 PM  

Rapmaster2000: Oh, it's Zero Hedge. Paranoia is not an investment.


I find it an interesting blog if for no other reason than I wonder who can possibly have the time to update their Twitter account as often as they do.
 
2012-10-03 12:57:37 PM  

TonnageVT: windows hardware?? really?? I should be shot at dawn, I meant windows machines.


For the longest time - Apple was using AS/400s for financial work

/although my guess is they've long since moved to oracle
 
2012-10-03 01:12:24 PM  
Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.
 
2012-10-03 01:38:54 PM  

Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.


Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!
 
2012-10-03 01:51:33 PM  

bingethinker: Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.

Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!


Pink Lady or GTFO, both of you.
 
2012-10-03 02:04:11 PM  

jdjoker: bingethinker: Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.

Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!

Pink Lady or GTFO, both of you.


Team Fuji!
 
2012-10-03 02:20:47 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-10-03 03:18:38 PM  

Rapmaster2000: jdjoker: bingethinker: Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.

Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!

Pink Lady or GTFO, both of you.

Team Fuji!


I'm sorry, the correct answer is "Honeycrisp."
 
2012-10-03 03:22:53 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Rapmaster2000: jdjoker: bingethinker: Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.

Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!

Pink Lady or GTFO, both of you.

Team Fuji!

I'm sorry, the correct answer is "Honeycrisp."


Wrong again.

Jazz apples 4 lyfe
 
2012-10-03 06:00:00 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Rapmaster2000: jdjoker: bingethinker: Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.

Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!

Pink Lady or GTFO, both of you.

Team Fuji!

I'm sorry, the correct answer is "Honeycrisp."


Honeycrisp are tasty, but they are too fookin' big. You eat one of those and you don't have much room left for anything else. Except my semen. You apple skanks always have room for that thankfully.
 
2012-10-03 06:34:36 PM  

jdjoker: bingethinker: Cymbal: Galas are the far superior apple. Braeburns are mealy and just terrible.

Oh geez, another Gala fanboi!

Pink Lady or GTFO, both of you.


THIS!

Cripps Pink Lady FTW. Since I found that gem of an apple nothing else even comes remotely close. Those rat bastards up the road at the local grocery store decided to STOP selling it so I must wander about the country side like an extra in The Walking Dead looking to satisfy my craving for those goddamn apples.

I need a hug now...
 
2012-10-03 07:10:02 PM  
No no no. Gravenstein. Those are the bestest.
 
2012-10-03 07:47:35 PM  

AcneVulgaris: It also lacks a penis.


That and a pair of testicles.
 
2012-10-04 02:29:04 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Oh, it's Zero Hedge. Paranoia is not an investment.


So you're a Cramer fan, I take it, investing in booo-yah.
 
2012-10-04 06:18:32 AM  
I like the Jazz apple - which was developed out of Braeburn and Royal Gala. There's a variety called Eve I like too. Both are sweet, juicy and crisp and I've found the Eve tends to resist browning. Apples are a big deal in New Zealand.
 
2012-10-04 08:00:22 AM  

Triumph: Rapmaster2000: Oh, it's Zero Hedge. Paranoia is not an investment.

So you're a Cramer fan, I take it, investing in booo-yah.


Zero Hedge is just idiocy at the opposite extreme from Cramer. It's run by paranoid morons (you know your blog is a big pile of fail when Forbes can smack you down). As usual, ZH doesn't know how accounting works. They're looking for info on Braeburn when all they have to do is read Apple's filings.

There's nothing mysterious about Braeburn, as ZH implies. They're invested in cash and Treasuries and other sorts of boring, low-yield-low-risk stuff. Which is what you'd expect them to be invested in for a company like Apple that has to stay liquid in order to lay down enormous sums in cash for production investments (thereby getting the best deals from suppliers).
 
2012-10-04 03:40:25 PM  

AcneVulgaris: Bonkthat_Again: A corporation is now a person, without the disadvantages of being human. It will not die. It will continue to acquire resources until there are none left.

It also lacks a penis.


However, corporations don't let the lack of penis stop them from farking us all in the ass.
 
2012-10-04 04:39:35 PM  

RickyWilliams'sBong: There's nothing mysterious about Braeburn, as ZH implies. They're invested in cash and Treasuries and other sorts of boring, low-yield-low-risk stuff. Which is what you'd expect them to be invested in for a company like Apple that has to stay liquid in order to lay down enormous sums in cash for production investments (thereby getting the best deals from suppliers).


Yeah - Forbes doesn't get it perfectly right either. It's not as transparent as they imply. All public corporations have to report their holding on the last day of the reporting period - that's it. For Apple, this probably means WYSIWYG, but for companies perhaps more inclined to be involved in things like insider trading, they will trade in and out of holdings to manage their public information and not give the SEC any reason to tag and monitor their trading.
 
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