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(Telegraph)   In its last gasp to squeeze every drop of publicity out of the popular book, sex toy retailer unveils Fifty Shades of Grey: the play-at-home set   (telegraph.co.uk) divider line 47
    More: Obvious, kinky sex, Dr Brooke Magnanti, BDSM  
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4105 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Oct 2012 at 10:08 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-10-03 10:09:43 AM
That's not the only thing being squeezed.
 
2012-10-03 10:13:31 AM
We need Paris/Britney/Lindsay to do something stupid and knock this book off the news cycle.

/sorry, I meant "really stupid". Obviously their current antics haven't been enough.
 
2012-10-03 10:15:06 AM
Well, I'm glad people have at least quit pretending this is a "book."

/Do they sell copies with the toys too?
 
2012-10-03 10:15:13 AM
Can't wait for the follow-up threads about the maimings and deaths.
 
2012-10-03 10:15:16 AM
I wish more news articles included a picture of a butt plug.
 
2012-10-03 10:15:51 AM

ChrisDe: We need Paris/Britney/Lindsay to do something stupid and knock this book off the news cycle.


I thought Amanda Bynes was the Hollywood farkup du jour.
 
2012-10-03 10:16:31 AM
imageshack.us

She looks EXACTLY like I thought she would.
 
2012-10-03 10:18:15 AM

ChrisDe: We need Paris/Britney/Lindsay to do something stupid and knock this book off the news cycle.

/sorry, I meant "really stupid". Obviously their current antics haven't been enough.


Really. I just read in the elevator that JK Rowlings' new book - The Casual Vacancy - will hit number one of the NYT best seller list tomorrow, bumping Fifty Shades of Gray. So there's hope.

Lindsey made the news over the weekend and is still certifiable, it seems.

/have never read Fifty Shades of Gray because I don't have a vagina.
 
2012-10-03 10:20:27 AM
Still a better love story than Twilight. Then again, so is a bus schedule.
 
2012-10-03 10:21:31 AM
"Jerry O'Connell as Herman Munster"

DEAR GOD, NO

If he's going to be in a shiatty remake, why not just reboot Sliders?
 
2012-10-03 10:21:55 AM

uzeial1986: Well, I'm glad people have at least quit pretending this is a "book."

/Do they sell copies with the toys too?


at Hustler Hollywood they do...

They have a Boxed Set Trilogy + 2 Toy (bullet and dildo) Combo Gift Set

Saw it there when the Mrs. and I were picking out a new Lelo for her...
 
2012-10-03 10:22:26 AM
And now I am filled with rage.
 
2012-10-03 10:23:32 AM
Been done:

www.whatrecords.co.uk
 
2012-10-03 10:24:42 AM

CeroX: uzeial1986: Well, I'm glad people have at least quit pretending this is a "book."

/Do they sell copies with the toys too?

at Hustler Hollywood they do...

They have a Boxed Set Trilogy + 2 Toy (bullet and dildo) Combo Gift Set

Saw it there when the Mrs. and I were picking out a new Lelo for her...


Say it ain't so...
 
2012-10-03 10:24:43 AM
what's Fifty Shades of Grey and why should I care? Can someone please key me in on whOHLOOKHONEYBOOBOOISON
 
2012-10-03 10:25:25 AM
Pfft. OK, first of all, this is totally for amateurs and not at all the way we do things in my Over-30 SM fantasy league.

First of all, you don't tie knots the way they do in the book. If you think those are good knots then you are a total poseur. I've been tying knots that you've probably never even heard of.
 
2012-10-03 10:27:27 AM
We've all had our fun this summer gently scoffing at the frowsy daydreamers who bought the Fifty Shades books in an attempt to reheat their love lives (basically, all of us) and gazing lustfully at the hot young things of the Olympics (again, all of us).

Um...no...

My love life is fine, and I'll stick to real porn if I want something raunchy, thanks.
And if I want to read a book I'll pick one from a real author. 

Plus, If I wanted to read fanfic I'd do it for free online.
 
2012-10-03 10:28:28 AM
Got an email from Barnes & Noble re a new book: "50 Shades of Chicken." Considered submitting it to Fark, then realized it was even too farkish for that.

/Let's all come up with our own (much better) titles: "50 Shades of..."?
 
S23
2012-10-03 10:28:36 AM
much better read.

much better toys :)

ego-living.com
 
2012-10-03 10:29:14 AM
It's like people were really excited about the book, and the excitement built up and peaked, and now people aren't so excited any more.
 
2012-10-03 10:33:09 AM

Rapmaster2000: Pfft. OK, first of all, this is totally for amateurs and not at all the way we do things in my Over-30 SM fantasy league.

First of all, you don't tie knots the way they do in the book. If you think those are good knots then you are a total poseur. I've been tying knots that you've probably never even heard of.


4/10

Leave that stuff to spentmiles
 
2012-10-03 10:34:40 AM

Snapper Carr: [imageshack.us image 460x287]

She looks EXACTLY like I thought she would.


seconded.
 
2012-10-03 10:36:13 AM

Abuse Liability: Rapmaster2000: Pfft. OK, first of all, this is totally for amateurs and not at all the way we do things in my Over-30 SM fantasy league.

First of all, you don't tie knots the way they do in the book. If you think those are good knots then you are a total poseur. I've been tying knots that you've probably never even heard of.

4/10

Leave that stuff to spentmiles


Nothing gets past this guy.
 
2012-10-03 10:36:32 AM

Evil Mackerel: Snapper Carr: [imageshack.us image 460x287]

She looks EXACTLY like I thought she would.

seconded.


Wait, who is that guy?
 
2012-10-03 10:40:29 AM
I was reading too fast, missed the word "sex," and was momentarily horrified. Because Poe's law has had me all screwed up lately. 

Also, it's apparently been a long time since my last login. According to the preview, the system has wished me happy birthday twice.
 
2012-10-03 10:51:17 AM
Couldn't get 5 pages in to the book because of the terrible writing. But it's nice to see that the morally upright are finally starting to enjoy a little bit of "deviance."
 
2012-10-03 10:52:30 AM

uzeial1986: CeroX: uzeial1986: Well, I'm glad people have at least quit pretending this is a "book."

/Do they sell copies with the toys too?

at Hustler Hollywood they do...

They have a Boxed Set Trilogy + 2 Toy (bullet and dildo) Combo Gift Set

Saw it there when the Mrs. and I were picking out a new Lelo for her...

Say it ain't so...


it's true... now it wasn't a prepackaged item like a company actually produces it, it was a Hustler Hollywood created gift set... but still...

They also had "The story of O" set up like that too, but i know very little about that book... though i CAN tell you they have 2 DVDs with the gift set, "The Real Story of O", and "A girl Named O" (if i remember right)
 
2012-10-03 10:53:05 AM

sodomizer: Still a better love story than Twilight. Then again, so is a bus schedule.


It's actually a worse love story than Twilight mainly because it's a terrible alternate universe Twilight fan fiction that just changed the names of the characters in order to get published. Twilight reads like Jane Austin compared to this craptastic derivative.

/Managed to get through the Twilight saga while only losing a few brain cells in the process. I had to delete 50 Shades after only a quarter of the way in because I felt my brain start to leak out of my ears.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2012-10-03 10:57:08 AM
This will end well.
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2012-10-03 11:07:26 AM

Wollffeey: sodomizer: Still a better love story than Twilight. Then again, so is a bus schedule.

It's actually a worse love story than Twilight mainly because it's a terrible alternate universe Twilight fan fiction that just changed the names of the characters in order to get published. Twilight reads like Jane Austin compared to this craptastic derivative.

/Managed to get through the Twilight saga while only losing a few brain cells in the process. I had to delete 50 Shades after only a quarter of the way in because I felt my brain start to leak out of my ears.


I don't know... my hot 48 year old MILF neighbor hates Twilight, but a couple weeks ago I saw her sitting out on the front steps of her porch engrossed in a book, and being a literary fan myself, I walked over (like i need an excuse, really) to ask what she was reading, and she nearly leaped off the steps when I spoke. She immediately blush and turned red and sheepishly admitted she was reading 50 Shades. I tried to actually talk to her about the book since I knew very little about it... I didn't get much out of her before she was so embarrassed even talking about it that she had to excuse herself inside...
 
2012-10-03 11:08:54 AM
I have two boxes of fiction books my sister lugged down the stairs for me to read and that trilogy is in there. The thing is, I've not read fiction of any kind in many years, so I lugged them out into the garage. She knows this, she just ran out of room on her bookshelves and so she parked 'em in my room as a "gift" so they'd be my problem. (GRRRR) I've not read the trilogy, obviously, and I probably never will. Don't know what the Salvation Army is going to think about it when I donate those boxes, but wish I could watch them sort those books, just for the lulz.

/just started "When the Norns Have Spoken: Time and Fate in Germanic Paganism" by Anthony Winterbourne
//atheist authors writing on Pagan and Heathen subjects are surprisingly good
 
2012-10-03 11:12:50 AM

Rapmaster2000: Pfft. OK, first of all, this is totally for amateurs and not at all the way we do things in my Over-30 SM fantasy league.

First of all, you don't tie knots the way they do in the book. If you think those are good knots then you are a total poseur. I've been tying knots that you've probably never even heard of.


You're my new favorite.
 
2012-10-03 11:14:52 AM

ThatGuyOverThere: Couldn't get 5 pages in to the book because of the terrible writing. But it's nice to see that the morally upright are finally starting to enjoy a little bit of "deviance."


Gonzo erotic writing and all that.... You're supposed to come every six pages.
 
2012-10-03 11:38:50 AM

CeroX: Wollffeey: sodomizer: Still a better love story than Twilight. Then again, so is a bus schedule.

It's actually a worse love story than Twilight mainly because it's a terrible alternate universe Twilight fan fiction that just changed the names of the characters in order to get published. Twilight reads like Jane Austin compared to this craptastic derivative.

/Managed to get through the Twilight saga while only losing a few brain cells in the process. I had to delete 50 Shades after only a quarter of the way in because I felt my brain start to leak out of my ears.

I don't know... my hot 48 year old MILF neighbor hates Twilight, but a couple weeks ago I saw her sitting out on the front steps of her porch engrossed in a book, and being a literary fan myself, I walked over (like i need an excuse, really) to ask what she was reading, and she nearly leaped off the steps when I spoke. She immediately blush and turned red and sheepishly admitted she was reading 50 Shades. I tried to actually talk to her about the book since I knew very little about it... I didn't get much out of her before she was so embarrassed even talking about it that she had to excuse herself inside...


Obviously Twilight didn't have enough sex for her. Check out her bookcase (if it exists) if you get a chance. I bet it's filled with garbage Harlequin romance novels.
 
2012-10-03 11:46:34 AM
It might have pages and a cover and be full of words, but it's not a book. It's idiotic chick pseudo-porn based on fan fiction that was written in response to a really crappy novel.
 
2012-10-03 11:49:30 AM

trippdogg: It might have pages and a cover and be full of words, but it's not a book. It's idiotic chick pseudo-porn based on fan fiction that was written in response to a really crappy novel.


It's not psudo-porn. It's just porn. And that's a good thing. Porn for chicks has gone mainstream, and that can only bode well for us all.
 
2012-10-03 12:50:08 PM
Ye gods, am I ever tired of hearing about this vile pile of vocabulary vomit calling itself a book.
 
2012-10-03 12:52:58 PM

Rent Party: Rapmaster2000: Pfft. OK, first of all, this is totally for amateurs and not at all the way we do things in my Over-30 SM fantasy league.

First of all, you don't tie knots the way they do in the book. If you think those are good knots then you are a total poseur. I've been tying knots that you've probably never even heard of.

You're my new favorite.


Yeah, I was lolling at your comments from that thread the other day in that sex hipster thread. People find a way to create rules and hierarchies for everything.
 
2012-10-03 02:13:07 PM
Everyone is capitalizing on the popularity of 50 Shades of Suck right now. My own company has been doing so for months now, and it's been very good for business.

I tried reading it and just couldn't make it through the first chapter. Terrible writing, totally unlikeable characters... The Harlequin novels I read in middle school were more titillating! But maybe because of where I work, sex toys and the topic of sex in general is not taboo so the hotness quotient of the book gets a big fat "meh" from me. Plus I have friends in the BDSM community who tell me the depictions in the book are totally unrealistic (not my thing but if I'm not the one f*cking you, I don't care what you do in the bedroom).
 
2012-10-03 02:41:16 PM

Rent Party: Porn for chicks has gone mainstream, and that can only bode well for us all.


You've obviously never looked inside a "romance" novel. They've been quite popular since way before this book.

"Romance" is code for threw her up against a wall and farked her brains out.
 
2012-10-03 02:42:14 PM
 
2012-10-03 02:58:22 PM

Snapper Carr: [imageshack.us image 460x287]

She looks EXACTLY like I thought she would.


Yep.
Kathy Bates looking
 
2012-10-03 03:26:05 PM

vudukungfu: Snapper Carr: [imageshack.us image 460x287]

She looks EXACTLY like I thought she would.

Yep.
Kathy Bates looking


Let's bring this full circle:

cdn.whatculture.com

Foreplay.
 
2012-10-03 03:54:09 PM

Ihaveanevilparrot: Rent Party: Porn for chicks has gone mainstream, and that can only bode well for us all.

You've obviously never looked inside a "romance" novel. They've been quite popular since way before this book.

"Romance" is code for threw her up against a wall and farked her brains out.


OK, you've got me there.

My understanding of the average bodice ripper was that the sex wasn't explicit, had lots turgid things in them, and only happened once or twice, because that's all it takes with the Magic Vagina.

I understand that SoG reads like a Penthouse Letter every chapter.

If true, that's real progress. And I will state categorically that the number of women getting off to it is far greater than any other book I've ever heard about.
 
2012-10-03 06:02:33 PM
I just got the audio book as read by Gilbert Gottfried.

/AFLAC!
 
2012-10-03 08:08:13 PM
Maybe I'm old, or maybe old fashioned, but I miss when shiat wasn't spelled out like that. I miss subtlety.
 
2012-10-04 12:36:15 PM
From my experience youngest either good quality gear or none at all. Just glad to see the kit didn't include cable ties as portrayed in the book.
 
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