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(Some Guy)   To everyone threatening to move to Canada: Can we get that in writing, please?   (dayriffer.com) divider line 217
    More: Unlikely, Tora Bora, Stephen Baldwin, nude beach, Madison Ave  
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8795 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Oct 2012 at 10:56 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-10-03 11:37:06 AM

WhippingBoy: Immigration to Canada should be a graduated process:
- the first year you're here, you have to live in the most northern town in Canada
- every year after that, you're allowed to move slightly South
- by the time your children's children are born, they'll be allowed in the good parts - Vancouver, Toronto (snerk!), etc.


What about Ingonish, or Meat Cove?
 
2012-10-03 11:37:29 AM

mrshowrules:

Let me be clear, love and respect the beaver whether rodent, vagina or child character in 1960's television show. When Canadians here "Wally, weren't you a little hard on the Beaver last night?", we don't laugh or make fun of this because we love the beaver even though we understand the obvious double-entdendre. We think "I hope Wally wasn't to stern with his son and also that he was gentle when penetrating his wife during sex."


Funny, when I hear "Wally, weren't you a little hard on the Beaver last night?" I wonder why Wally is disciplining his brother, and why he was penetrating his mother.

//Not how I remember that show.
 
2012-10-03 11:38:38 AM

cassanovascotian: If there are progressive's in the U.S. who think that moving to Canada is going to bring them to a more progressive, liberal society, I got bad news for them.

this guy

[www.nndb.com image 228x285]

quit Kyoto.
Accepts the use of classified information gained through torture.
Drastically increased carbon output.
Tried to roll back gay-marriage.
his party even recently toyed with criminalizing abortion...

yeah, so I'm about as far left as lefties come, and if Obama gets reelected, I'm thinking of moving stateside.


But just look how his pretty blue eyes match his shirt and tie.
 
2012-10-03 11:38:57 AM

Tat'dGreaser: only one party to rule the country


A, We don't have "rulers". B. The Republicans are doing a fine job of imploding on their own, no where did I say we need one party.
 
2012-10-03 11:39:09 AM
Coo roo coo coo coo coo coo coo!

I'd get in.
 
2012-10-03 11:39:12 AM

bim1154: Why move to Canada.. just wait a few more years and the U.S. will be pretty much the same.


F that.. we aint bailing your asses out.
 
2012-10-03 11:40:46 AM
It's been fun, I've got to get back to work.
 
2012-10-03 11:41:47 AM

cassanovascotian: If there are progressive's in the U.S. who think that moving to Canada is going to bring them to a more progressive, liberal society, I got bad news for them.

this guy

[www.nndb.com image 228x285]

...
his party even recently toyed with criminalizing abortion...



Not really. The motion was about striking a committee to study the ethical question "When does life begin.", which is a perfectly fine philosophical/scientific question.

The problem is that the only people who want to study this question are trying to use it as a backdoor into the abortion debate. ONLY anti-abortion people want it discussed.

On the other side of the coin, the pro-choice people refuse to discuss it at all, and will aggressively name-call if you mention it.
 
2012-10-03 11:41:57 AM

mightybaldking: mrshowrules:

Let me be clear, love and respect the beaver whether rodent, vagina or child character in 1960's television show. When Canadians here "Wally, weren't you a little hard on the Beaver last night?", we don't laugh or make fun of this because we love the beaver even though we understand the obvious double-entdendre. We think "I hope Wally wasn't to stern with his son and also that he was gentle when penetrating his wife during sex."

Funny, when I hear "Wally, weren't you a little hard on the Beaver last night?" I wonder why Wally is disciplining his brother, and why he was penetrating his mother.

//Not how I remember that show.


LOL. Another epic failure on my part. I meant Ward although my version would be more interesting.
 
2012-10-03 11:42:18 AM

WhippingBoy: Immigration to Canada should be a graduated process:
- the first year you're here, you have to live in the most northern town in Canada
- every year after that, you're allowed to move slightly South
- by the time your children's children are born, they'll be allowed in the good parts - Vancouver, Toronto (snerk!), etc.


There are some nice northern towns in Canada. Whitehorse is really nice it is a shame so many Canadians never go further north than Edmonton or Halifax
 
2012-10-03 11:42:42 AM

kimwim: A, We don't have "rulers". B. The Republicans are doing a fine job of imploding on their own, no where did I say we need one party.


Our of a essentially two party system you want one party to disappear, is that what you're saying?

Look my point is you sound just as f*cking retarded as some backward ass hillbilly KKK member who threatens to move if Obama gets reelected. If the words "if this person wins an election then I'm leaving" then do everyone a favor and leave now.
 
2012-10-03 11:43:17 AM
Preview first, always preview first
 
2012-10-03 11:44:00 AM

spelletrader: mrshowrules: Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.

1) Can you milk a moose?
2) Can you drink 24 beers and still cook one pound of back bacon without burning yourself?
3) Do you love and respect the beaver?
4) Do you find anything Rick Mercer's says to actually be funny?
5) Do you think the Trailer Park boys is actually a documentary?

1 - With a helmet on, yes.
2 - As long as it's Molson
3 - In all things, literally and figuratively
4 - Before or after the 24 beers and pound of bacon?
5 - In a certain sense, yes.


Welcome to Canada. You even picked out the trick questions. You can stay at my house if you need a place for awhile but don't have sex with my sister. Just kidding - go ahead.
 
2012-10-03 11:44:57 AM

Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.


Canada doesn't want most Americans, they have their own rednecks to deal with.

Hell, customs threatened not to let me in when I was flown in to fix a problem with one of their major telecom carriers since I couldn't demonstrate that the job couldn't be done by a Canadian. Mr Customs Guy was a little surprised when I laughed in his face and asked him to please deny me entry to Ottawa in farking February so I could take the next plane back to southern California while his telecom network burned down around his ears.
 
2012-10-03 11:45:53 AM

cassanovascotian: If there are progressive's in the U.S. who think that moving to Canada is going to bring them to a more progressive, liberal society, I got bad news for them.

this guy

[www.nndb.com image 228x285]

quit Kyoto.
Accepts the use of classified information gained through torture.
Drastically increased carbon output.
Tried to roll back gay-marriage.
his party even recently toyed with criminalizing abortion...

yeah, so I'm about as far left as lefties come, and if Obama gets reelected, I'm thinking of moving stateside.


I'm not really a huge fan of Stephen Harper but, holy hyperbole batman.

Quitting Kyoto is no worse than staying in and not meeting any of the targets

I got nothing on the torture other than I agree that the guy is a scumbag

Carbon output in 2008 was 544,091x10^3 tons in 2010 it was 518,475 and 2008 was the middle of the recession when global output was reduced. (both numbers from the UN)

Lets be fair here the guy deserves to be booted from office and roundly criticized but he's not exactly history's greatest monster. His greatest failure is the abortion that is the omnibus crime bill and minimum mandatory sentencing, but hey at least he scrapped the long gun registry.
 
2012-10-03 11:48:58 AM
Karma's a beeotch, I guess it's payback for shipping them Myers, Carrey and Dion. Thx again for that BTW.
 
2012-10-03 11:49:48 AM
I wish someone with talent and skill could shop up a neutral document for these people. A contractual looking thing that states something like 'If _______ (insert candidate) does not win the _______ (political event) I will be moving to Canada'

Then they can add some official sounding I swear the aforementioned to be true type stuff to it.

It'd be nice to have something simple to post in threads or places like FB to respond to the Canada threat.
 
2012-10-03 11:51:45 AM

meanmutton: Karac: "[Actor Stephen] Baldwin has been an outspoken detractor of President Obama and gay marriage - calling the latter 'unconstitutional' and once threatening to move to Canada upon the election of the former."

Actor/musician/celebrity disagrees with republican policies: "Who cares what some hollywood type thinks?"
Actor/musician/celebrity agrees with republican policies: "Lets put him on TV to show that the cool people like us."

To be honest, the only opinion I care about from Stephen Baldwin is what he's going to do to get Jayne Cobb and Firefly back on the air, a plan which would preferably involve Wash coming back to life.

Adam Baldwin is Best Baldwin.


He's not even a Baldwin brother.

Would anyone really miss Stephen Baldwin? The last notable thing he did was Usual Suspects.
 
2012-10-03 11:54:36 AM
I'm moving overseas no matter who wins.

tea party has ruined this country.
 
2012-10-03 11:55:28 AM

mrshowrules: spelletrader: mrshowrules: Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.

1) Can you milk a moose?
2) Can you drink 24 beers and still cook one pound of back bacon without burning yourself?
3) Do you love and respect the beaver?
4) Do you find anything Rick Mercer's says to actually be funny?
5) Do you think the Trailer Park boys is actually a documentary?

1 - With a helmet on, yes.
2 - As long as it's Molson
3 - In all things, literally and figuratively
4 - Before or after the 24 beers and pound of bacon?
5 - In a certain sense, yes.

Welcome to Canada. You even picked out the trick questions. You can stay at my house if you need a place for awhile but don't have sex with my sister. Just kidding - go ahead.


I knew that some day my "Canadian girlfriend" experiences would pay off.
 
2012-10-03 11:57:09 AM

cassanovascotian: Tried to roll back gay-marriage.
his party even recently toyed with criminalizing abortion...


next to the Smart and Funny buttons I want a Stupid button.

jesus dude. not even close to true.
 
2012-10-03 12:03:18 PM

GAT_00: I expect roughly the same number of people will leave if Obama wins a second term as the number of people who left after Bush won a second term.


I actually managed to move to Ireland right before Bush's second term, so I'm getting a kick out of this thread.

/Had to come back in '08 when the Celtic Tiger died.
//The Guinness was great!
 
2012-10-03 12:05:41 PM

Hermione_Granger: Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.

This.


And I as well. I really don't want to live here if Romney wins.

/There must be some country that'll take me
//Can I claim political asylum?
///If I stay here, I'll be in a mental asylum
 
2012-10-03 12:06:04 PM

This text is now purple: Need_MindBleach: Americans: Threatening to move to Canada since 1776.

That took patience. There was no Canada until 1867.


[lolwut.jpg]
 
2012-10-03 12:12:37 PM

mrshowrules: spelletrader: mrshowrules: Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.

1) Can you milk a moose?
2) Can you drink 24 beers and still cook one pound of back bacon without burning yourself?
3) Do you love and respect the beaver?
4) Do you find anything Rick Mercer's says to actually be funny?
5) Do you think the Trailer Park boys is actually a documentary?

1 - With a helmet on, yes.
2 - As long as it's Molson
3 - In all things, literally and figuratively
4 - Before or after the 24 beers and pound of bacon?
5 - In a certain sense, yes.

Welcome to Canada. You even picked out the trick questions. You can stay at my house if you need a place for awhile but don't have sex with my sister. Just kidding - go ahead.


Not so fast, they didn't say hockey helmet and they want to drink Molson beer.
The helmet thing, we could probably forgive them for, as that is the only respectable helmet to wear and hockey is usually implied. But wanting to drink that Molson swill will not be tolerated, they must be turned back.
 
2012-10-03 12:14:34 PM

hovsm: I like Toronto and I don't like big cities but it was nice. Lots of diversity for my food needs.


Ahem.
 
2012-10-03 12:16:04 PM
If anyone wants to move to Canada just let them know. They dont have to carry a gun and the stampede is an actual event. A rather large one
 
2012-10-03 12:20:07 PM
When I moved from Canada to the U.S., I inadvertently raised the average IQ of both countries.
 
2012-10-03 12:33:14 PM

Egoy3k: cassanovascotian: If there are progressive's in the U.S. who think that moving to Canada is going to bring them to a more progressive, liberal society, I got bad news for them.

this guy

[www.nndb.com image 228x285]

quit Kyoto.
Accepts the use of classified information gained through torture.
Drastically increased carbon output.
Tried to roll back gay-marriage.
his party even recently toyed with criminalizing abortion...

yeah, so I'm about as far left as lefties come, and if Obama gets reelected, I'm thinking of moving stateside.

I'm not really a huge fan of Stephen Harper but, holy hyperbole batman.

Quitting Kyoto is no worse than staying in and not meeting any of the targets

I got nothing on the torture other than I agree that the guy is a scumbag

Carbon output in 2008 was 544,091x10^3 tons in 2010 it was 518,475 and 2008 was the middle of the recession when global output was reduced. (both numbers from the UN)

Lets be fair here the guy deserves to be booted from office and roundly criticized but he's not exactly history's greatest monster. His greatest failure is the abortion that is the omnibus crime bill and minimum mandatory sentencing, but hey at least he scrapped the long gun registry.


I won't ever vote for him because of his politicization of science.
 
2012-10-03 12:39:28 PM
I don't want some random Baldwin any more than you do, America.

An Ireland on the verge of getting turfed from the EU might, however, and they are stage-Irish in a hokey sort of "licence to drink" way.
 
2012-10-03 12:39:33 PM
Could I move to Thailand instead?
www.dreamstime.com
For the ladyboys.
 
2012-10-03 12:41:10 PM
Adam Baldwin with a Canadian (me) and Jayne in Lego. (Signature reads "Shiny! Let's be bad guys")

i153.photobucket.com
 
2012-10-03 12:41:18 PM
Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.

1) Can you milk a moose?
2) Can you drink 24 beers and still cook one pound of back bacon without burning yourself?
3) Do you love and respect the beaver?
4) Do you find anything Rick Mercer's says to actually be funny?
5) Do you think the Trailer Park boys is actually a documentary?


/6) The Tragically Hip's entire catalogue
//7) RUSH 2112, Hemispheres, & Moving Pictures
 
2012-10-03 12:51:37 PM

Carth: WhippingBoy: Immigration to Canada should be a graduated process:
- the first year you're here, you have to live in the most northern town in Canada
- every year after that, you're allowed to move slightly South
- by the time your children's children are born, they'll be allowed in the good parts - Vancouver, Toronto (snerk!), etc.

There are some nice northern towns in Canada. Whitehorse is really nice it is a shame so many Canadians never go further north than Edmonton or Halifax


Why you chose to include Halifax, I don't know, given that it's geographically further south than just about every major Canadian city except for the greater Toronto area.
 
2012-10-03 12:52:25 PM
As a Michigan native, I've been waiting eagerly for the day when my state finally becomes a legal part of Canada. We're practically Canada anyway. Please, just sell Michigan to Canada.
 
2012-10-03 12:56:17 PM

Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.


I've often wonder what it would be like if native born citizens had to meet the standards that are applied to immigrants. I suspect that a lot of people would be asked to leave--Canada, the USA or any other country. Perhaps a poor country could be found that would be able to use your skills.

Perhaps not. Poor countries need doctors, nurses. engineers, entrepreneurs, etc., just as much as rich countries, and more so.
 
2012-10-03 12:57:20 PM

Cythraul: I've actually looked into Canada's immigration policies and naturalization requirements. And my reaction was, "yeah, I SO do not meet their standards."

Unless I'm misremembering their 'must have' list.


Unfortunately for me, they don't have an extremem shortage of science teachers.

I would love to have socialized medicine, low crime rates and a real safety net.
 
2012-10-03 12:57:53 PM
I wish I could move to Canada. I'll even take a northern town to start. It's not like it gets any colder than Fairbanks.

1) Can you milk a moose?
2) Can you drink 24 beers and still cook one pound of back bacon without burning yourself?
3) Do you love and respect the beaver?
4) Do you find anything Rick Mercer's says to actually be funny?
5) Do you think the Trailer Park boys is actually a documentary?

1 - Close! I had a pet moose growing up. Buffy would let us pet and hand feed her, but she never had a calf. Traffic tragedy.
2 - I'm more of a whiskey guy, myself. That's still Canadian, at least. Bring on the peameal, though; yum.
3 - Their pelts make great furniture ornaments. Does that count? As for the figurative beaver, there's none here. Wouldn't know.
4 - I'm not too familiar with the guy, but he seems angry at everything. Harsh. Not my type of comedy.
5 - Not much of a TV watcher.
 
2012-10-03 01:00:36 PM

GAT_00: I expect roughly the same number of people will leave if Obama wins a second term as the number of people who left after Bush won a second term.


Everyone gather round, it's CSB time!

In 2004, I was just a young college student, taking some of my first anthropology courses. In the fall semester, I was assigned to a course which was being taught by a newly hired guy who had just graduated from UCLA or USC or one of those California schools. We could immediately tell that he was the libbiest lib to ever lib. He ranted about the upcoming election almost every class. Then, the class after the election, he didn't show up to class. The class after that, a different professor showed up and let us know that the new guy had become so disgusted with the US after re-electing Bush, that he had moved to Canada. In the middle of the semester.

What a farking douchecanoe.

/CSB
 
2012-10-03 01:01:49 PM
Dear Yankees threatening to move to Canada, we don't farking want you.
 
2012-10-03 01:02:58 PM
So, whether Canada, France or otherwise...
You'll essentially be moving to a country that has the same policies you claim pissed at.

Cause, I can't think of ANY other nation that follows the GOP platform.

Good move.
Enjoy being a socialist.
 
2012-10-03 01:03:18 PM
Universal health care, low rate of gun crime and friendly people?

I'm voting for Obama but maybe I should more there.
 
2012-10-03 01:07:51 PM

i_got_no_strings: I'm hoping the whole "moving to Canada" bit is easier if there's a company there that already wants you.


Significantly easier, at least in terms of the actual immigration bit. Job offer, speaks/read/writes English or French, and years formal education are their top checkboxes.
 
2012-10-03 01:08:17 PM
Dear Stephen Balwdin,

You're an intolerant farking moron and we don't want you here. Move to the UK. Maybe they'll let you back on 8 Out Of 10 Cats.

Sincerely,
Canada.

P.S. You sucked on 8/10 anyway.
 
2012-10-03 01:12:33 PM
Hey non patriotic quitters:

Canada doesn't want you!
 
2012-10-03 01:23:47 PM

Hebalo: Adam Baldwin with a Canadian (me) and Jayne in Lego. (Signature reads "Shiny! Let's be bad guys")

[i153.photobucket.com image 640x480]


I think I hate you a little right now.
 
2012-10-03 01:25:19 PM
Advice to immigrants

1. Learn French and English, especially French. Quebec more or less runs its own immigration system, and they are always happy to get immigrants that won't jam their small, crowded English-language schools (as there is extremely high demand for English immersion among the Speak-White crowd of French nationalists). You do not have the right to have your children educated in English (some English-speaking Canadians are grandfathered, but not immigrants). English schools are for the French. If you come from an English-speaking country other than Canada, you are shiat-out-of-luck unless you are very rich and can send your children to private schools, say UCC in Ontario.

2. Line up a job in Canada before you come, especially one in a badly needed trade, profession, or economic sector. A job is your ticket to ride the pogey train in the winter. It is also indespensible to get into the country unless you are a refugee (and even people who are terrified to go home because they'll be raped, tortured and murdered can have problems because the refugee claim boards are spotty at best).

3. Be prepared to be sent to Siberia. Well, not exactly Siberia, but something very like Siberia. Even if you are an M.D., your skills are hardest to get in rural areas, not to mention the out back of no where, so it is much easier to get your qualifications recognized and yourself a job in Feckallthere, Athabaska, than Whoneedsya, Toronto.

4. Bring a lot of money, and jobs. Lots of jobs. Canada has a fast-track for investors and entrepreneurs. The speed with which $250,000 or more can get you through Citizenship & Immigration is breath-taking compared to the processing of refugees with no jobs, money, or useable skills. If you want to create jobs in the sticks, so much better. The Government will probably match you dollar for dollar. Probably. They'll also be a pain in various body parts.

Canada's immigration system is a model much admired in countries where the emphasis is on refugees and not on high-yield economic refugees of the right sort. There are still people who immigrate to Canada because it's a pain-in-the-ass to try to farm in Europe and nearly impossible even if you can afford the land. But nowadays, first class professionals become first class citizens before they lose their accents.

Canadian authorities have ALWAYS been very pragmatic and have always complained about the quality of material they have to work with. They resented being used as a dumping ground for the Mother Country's white trash and always fought hard to get people who could farm, mine, cut timber, fish, or build an economy from the ground up. Unlike Australia and Virginia, Canada was never really a penal colony, and the hundreds of thousands of semi-orphaned urban waifs plucked from the streets of London, Edinborough or Liverpool were regarded as a source of cheap bonded labour.

Nasty but profitable, not unlike the penal system in the Deep South or America generally today.
Some people tend to confuse charity and slavery. They are not ALL conservatives. Some are really bad liberals.

5. Be prepared to discover Canada is quite different from the clichés. In reality, Canada is a very competitive entrepreneurial place. It was settled by hard-working peasants of all nations, and by grasping, industrial and commercial Scottish Protestants (plus a lot of the RC kind).

The spirit of Andrew Carnagie is alive and well, as well as the more leftist and do-gooder variety. Scots, I find, tend to run to extremes. They are either raggetty-assed scoundrels or pious saints, ice-hearted conservatives or bluff generous liberals. And the Scot lassies are a completely different species from the male. It's like some sort of foreign warrior tribe invaded and killed all the men but kept the women. That's possibly what really happened--about a dozen times.

All in all, Canada is a Nordic nation. It is a lot like Iceland, Sweden, Norway or Finland (less like Denmark perhaps). It's a bit like some of the nicer bits of Russia. It is not entirely foreign to the British or French, but the Dutch and the Scandinavians are better equipped to deal with the landscape, the climate, the people and the customs. And maybe Ukrainians.

If you can live in Wisconsin or Minnesotta, you can probably take Canada. If not, stay the hell in Georgia, Bubba! You will not find a New Georgia in Canada. There is no such place. There are plenty of other countries, states and regions, though. Almost anybody can become a Canadian in ten years or so, at least to the point of complaining about immigrants and drinking double doubles to keep warm. There's no obligation to totally go whole hog WASP. Your children can go native before they learn to put on their own shoes, but you can retain a lot of the old-country ways, just don't bring terrorists or old quarrels. Leave 'em at the town limits. This is a policed community, although not totally gated.
 
2012-10-03 01:28:05 PM

kimwim: If Rmoney wins, I don't think I want to live in a country that could elect such a person. If my grandmother could leave Poland to give her children and grandchildren a better future, I honor her memory by doing the same.

But it's hard to move to Canada. We looked into buying property last year. The only way to do it that we could see was to borrow money from a Canadian bank, and, we had to own property in the US that we had to go back to at the least every 6 months. The Canadian government didn't want us overstaying our welcome. So I don't know how one retires to Canada.


The way I did it was to go to school, get a post-grad work permit and marry my Canadian BF (Now husband).

They are changing the laws so it's harder to sponsor people though.
 
2012-10-03 01:34:18 PM

brantgoose: A job is your ticket to ride the pogey train in the winter.


Wth is this shiat?
 
2012-10-03 01:35:52 PM
I think canada is a perfectly nice place to move to.
Beautiful, inexpensive cabins, and maybe ogopogo swimming by my future dock

I don't vote, because there's nothing worth voting for
and america certainly seems to have a huge self destructive streak
so...I can make myself crazy pretending my opinion/life/lives of our soldiers
matters to millionaire politicical whores

or I can watch it circle the drain with disinterest
and collect my VA benefits along with my check for working in the gub'mint you twits keep putting your faith in
 
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