FARK.com: (7360989) The national crisis is over; Florida's rogue manatee rider/molester has been brought to justice

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		The national crisis is over; Florida's rogue manatee rider/molester has been brought to justice (ramblingbeachcat.com)		32
		More: Followup, manatees, sex crimes

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4119 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Oct 2012 at 10:52 AM | Favorite | share:

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gja		2012-10-03 10:54:13 AM

This was top-o-the-charts for their L.E.O.?

/waste of time/money/taxpayers funds

AnotherOldFart		2012-10-03 10:54:14 AM

The manatee is the one not wearing the hat correct?

Reverend Monkeypants		2012-10-03 10:55:52 AM

Who farking cares?

She wasn't chopping it up with a boat propellor or poisoning it by dumping hair gel and fake tan lotion into the water.

Maybe the sea-cow enjoyed the contact. Stupid law.

smadge1		2012-10-03 10:56:59 AM

Which one was the manatee?

skinink		2012-10-03 10:57:06 AM

I'm gonna wait outside her window, so the next time I see her having sex I'll crawl through the window and start rubbing myself on her backside.

To be fair, she didn't think the manatees were mating. She thought they were writing the next script for Family Guy.

Pud		2012-10-03 10:57:28 AM

FTA - According to witnesses on the beach that day, the woman was riding atop a manatee that was attempting to mate with another one.

/Bow - chicka - bow - wow

Lerxst2k		2012-10-03 10:58:07 AM

I would love to see this go to trial.

BalugaJoe		2012-10-03 10:58:55 AM

She should be forced to watch Gallery Girls.

smadge1		2012-10-03 10:59:15 AM

Cue creepy manatee threesome.

gja		2012-10-03 10:59:36 AM

Pud: FTA - According to witnesses on the beach that day, the woman was riding atop a manatee that was attempting to mate with another one.

/Bow - chicka - bow - wow

Looked at pictures. Looks like it was a three-way to me.

Amos Quito		2012-10-03 11:00:10 AM

Pud: FTA - According to witnesses on the beach that day, the woman was riding atop a manatee that was attempting to mate with another one.

/Bow - chicka - bow - wow

It's pretty sad when even horny manatees reject your advances.

Pick		2012-10-03 11:00:42 AM

Whew! Glad that's over. Guns can all go back in the gun safe now. And I will be able to get a good nights sleep.

Amos Quito		2012-10-03 11:00:59 AM

gja: Pud: FTA - According to witnesses on the beach that day, the woman was riding atop a manatee that was attempting to mate with another one.

/Bow - chicka - bow - wow

Looked at pictures. Looks like it was a three-way to me.

What if she's pregnant now?

turbotikigod		2012-10-03 11:01:32 AM

Reverend Monkeypants:
Maybe the sea-cow enjoyed the contact.
I'm pretty sure she did. That's why she was riding the manatee in the first place.

moravaman		2012-10-03 11:01:43 AM

Oh the huge manatee.

WhoopAssWayne		2012-10-03 11:05:25 AM

Pick: Whew! Glad that's over. Guns can all go back in the gun safe now. And I will be able to get a good nights sleep.

Yes, your wife and I are relieved, god bless her.

SirTanon		2012-10-03 11:05:54 AM

This article calls her a 'sea cow'... or something.

/snerk

182		2012-10-03 11:07:25 AM

Pud: FTA - According to witnesses on the beach that day, the woman was riding atop a manatee that was attempting to mate with another one.

/Bow - chicka - bow - wow

thread ova.

The Jami Turman Fan Club		2012-10-03 11:11:36 AM

Can anybody who has better 'shop skills than me make a "Oh the Huge Manatee" pic for this?

SevenizGud		2012-10-03 11:14:43 AM

Defendant presents citing law requiring manatees not be disturbed and asserts her action did not constitute a disturbance.

Law is ruled unenforceable due to being overly vague in its governing language.

Case dismissed.

Court Adjourned.

mortimer_ford		2012-10-03 11:21:53 AM

SevenizGud: Defendant presents citing law requiring manatees not be disturbed and asserts her action did not constitute a disturbance.

Law is ruled unenforceable due to being overly vague in its governing language.

Case dismissed.

Court Adjourned.

Prosecutor:Your honor, may I call a surprise witness?

Judge:I'll allow it.

Prosecutor:The Manatee

courtrooom:GASP

Big Beef Burrito		2012-10-03 11:24:16 AM

mortimer_ford: SevenizGud: Defendant presents citing law requiring manatees not be disturbed and asserts her action did not constitute a disturbance.

Law is ruled unenforceable due to being overly vague in its governing language.

Case dismissed.

Court Adjourned.

Prosecutor:Your honor, may I call a surprise witness?

Judge:I'll allow it.

Prosecutor:The Manatee

courtrooom:GASP

Prosecuter: Mr. Tee, show us on the doll where the defendent touched you.

StrikitRich		2012-10-03 11:29:10 AM

When officers arrived at her home, Gutierrez claimed ignorance of the state's strict laws against manatee disturbance/molestation. She was not arrested, but charges will be brought against her by State Attorney's office for prosecution.

If the State Attorney's office has time to prosecute this, that must mean that they have no other real criminals to deal with, right? Way to go Pinellas County!!!

Now, can we get back to illegally feeding dolphins in Sarasota Bay? Link

Frehar		2012-10-03 11:30:59 AM

Our long national nightmare is over.

picturescrazy		2012-10-03 11:36:05 AM

OK why title her a manatee molester? She wasn't doing anything sexual. Yes they were trying to mate but she didn't know that. Hopefully.

poodebunker		2012-10-03 11:43:56 AM

turbotikigod: Reverend Monkeypants:
Maybe the sea-cow enjoyed the contact.
I'm pretty sure she did. That's why she was riding the manatee in the first place.

Coffee everywhere! Sprayed nearly three feet! Thanks alot....

beefoe		2012-10-03 12:00:26 PM

If she's convicted does she up on some marine animal offender list? Is required to stay at least 500 feet away from Sea World?

Albert911emt		2012-10-03 12:15:47 PM

Nothing like hot manatee lovin for a good time.

StrikitRich		2012-10-03 12:17:26 PM

beefoe: If she's convicted does she up on some marine animal offender list? Is required to stay at least 500 feet away from Sea World?

And the Red Lobster, too, of course.