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(TMZ)   This is why America cannot have nice things: TLC gives Honey Boo Boo a $15k/episode raise   (tmz.com) divider line 194
    More: Asinine, TLC, Sugar Bear  
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3534 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 01 Oct 2012 at 1:03 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-10-01 12:21:14 PM
I keep telling my kids to never aspire to be people like this. Our country shouldn't reward attention whores who dumb down the collective IQ of an entire city when that sh*t is on. They say they watch because it makes them feel better about themselves. I'm sure this annoying kid and her mom care, as they are on TV and making good money.
 
2012-10-01 12:22:16 PM
Actually, it would appear this this particular subset of America will be having many nice things.
 
2012-10-01 12:23:00 PM
We really need to change the American Flag from the stars and stripes to a facepalm.
 
2012-10-01 12:39:59 PM
I had no idea what a 'Honey Boo-boo' was until about a week ago when a friend foisted it upon me.

I know pray for the end times.
 
2012-10-01 12:45:11 PM
While I have just cause to hate many reality shows, this one makes me want to hurl and take a baseball bat to the creators.

I watched some of it, once. That was more than enough. It's so bad that the one about young folks from Jersey seems good in comparison. It makes the characters on 'Lizard Lick' towing seem smart.

Her accent makes me want to hurl. Her mother reminds me of that fat broad on 'Squidbillies'.

Aside from 'Mythbusters' I don't like any of the reality shows but this one needs to have the creators shipped out for lots of shock treatments and maybe a lobotomy or two.
 
2012-10-01 12:50:05 PM
Well, at least now her mom won't starve to death.
 
2012-10-01 12:53:57 PM
The terrorists have won.
 
2012-10-01 12:55:48 PM
There is no God.
 
2012-10-01 12:59:10 PM

Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores


If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.
 
2012-10-01 01:05:29 PM
JUST IN CASE YOU NEEDED ANOTHER REMINDER, I, IN NO SHAPE OR FORM, EXIST.

-- God
 
2012-10-01 01:06:12 PM
I've had a sinking feeling that, millions of years from now, when alien archaeological expeditions uncover our civilization, that this show will be all they can find.
 
2012-10-01 01:07:19 PM
There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.
 
2012-10-01 01:07:27 PM
I, for one, am glad I can still profess total ignorance on who the hell this person is.
 
2012-10-01 01:09:34 PM
What the he double hockey sticks is a honey boo boo? Is it something like a honey badger?

Each day we get closer to idiocracy I gather.
 
2012-10-01 01:11:03 PM
Never seen the show, but is Dueling Banjos the intro song?
 
2012-10-01 01:11:35 PM

jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.


Please please please please be trolling

/Please
 
2012-10-01 01:13:56 PM

CynicalLA: There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com

I admit to watching it for a minute, but in my defense I thought it was a Return of the Jedi reboot.
 
2012-10-01 01:14:05 PM

Tanukis_Parachute: What the he double hockey sticks is a honey boo boo? Is it something like a honey badger?

Each day we get closer to idiocracy I gather.


And the honey badger doesn't care.
 
2012-10-01 01:14:36 PM

Nadie_AZ: I keep telling my kids to never aspire to be people like this. Our country shouldn't reward attention whores who dumb down the collective IQ of an entire city when that sh*t is on. They say they watch because it makes them feel better about themselves. I'm sure this annoying kid and her mom care, as they are on TV and making good money.


I don't get TLC, but I've been reading about Honey Boo Boo on various websites so...

There's a fundamental difference between them and the rest of reality TV: They seem to love each other and enjoy everybody else's company. And considering they are a hit we should take as a net positive.

The US has a long history of gawking/laughing/studying hillbillies/White Trash in TV fiction ~ The Waltons, Roseanne to Green Acres and Beverly Hillbillies. It shouldn't come as a surprise to anybody that after the urban train wrecks of "The Real Housewives of ..." that we should get one from Kentucky/Alabama or where ever.
 
2012-10-01 01:14:39 PM
Let's give some chimpanzees a few handguns, some fireworks and several gallons of gasoline and see what happens!

Next, on TLC, "Monkey Boom!"
 
2012-10-01 01:15:52 PM
 
2012-10-01 01:18:21 PM
Hopefully Honey Boo Boo buys her mommy a personal trainer for Christmas.....
 
2012-10-01 01:19:13 PM

jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.


Well in their neighborhood it will all go to some meth lord when all is said and done.
 
2012-10-01 01:19:18 PM

jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.


You want to live close to your meth dealer.
 
2012-10-01 01:20:18 PM
Ruthless Reviews Destroys Honey Boo Boo Show

This was posted by TappingTheVein in the last Honey Boo Boo thread. It should be posted in every thread. Brutally delicious review.
 
2012-10-01 01:20:34 PM

Komplex: Nadie_AZ: I keep telling my kids to never aspire to be people like this. Our country shouldn't reward attention whores who dumb down the collective IQ of an entire city when that sh*t is on. They say they watch because it makes them feel better about themselves. I'm sure this annoying kid and her mom care, as they are on TV and making good money.

I don't get TLC, but I've been reading about Honey Boo Boo on various websites so...

There's a fundamental difference between them and the rest of reality TV: They seem to love each other and enjoy everybody else's company. And considering they are a hit we should take as a net positive.

The US has a long history of gawking/laughing/studying hillbillies/White Trash in TV fiction ~ The Waltons, Roseanne to Green Acres and Beverly Hillbillies. It shouldn't come as a surprise to anybody that after the urban train wrecks of "The Real Housewives of ..." that we should get one from Kentucky/Alabama or where ever.


The show with the Duggars is like that too. They really do love each, and the husband actually works and shiat.

The one with the dwarfs is good too.
 
2012-10-01 01:21:45 PM
Just think of all the gravy that kind of money can buy!
 
2012-10-01 01:25:55 PM
I loved her show, especially the crossover episode with Kate Gosselin.
 
2012-10-01 01:26:34 PM
I saw something the other day that made me think of this. Kinda made me P.O.'d.

Then I remembered that people have been paying to see the circus for a long time. No matter how much money that family is given... they're still that family and they have to live with that fact long after or short attention span passes them by.
 
2012-10-01 01:28:46 PM
cdn.blogs.sheknows.com
 
2012-10-01 01:29:23 PM

kingflower: Hopefully Honey Boo Boo buys her mommy a personal trainer hysterectomy for Christmas.....


FTFY
 
2012-10-01 01:31:17 PM

Hershey Highway Patrol: kingflower: Hopefully Honey Boo Boo buys her mommy a personal trainer hysterectomy for Christmas.....

FTFY


Or maybe they can invest in some hygene
 
2012-10-01 01:31:27 PM

airsupport: Let's give some chimpanzees a few handguns, some fireworks and several gallons of gasoline and see what happens!

Next, on TLC, "Monkey Boom!"


SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!
 
2012-10-01 01:31:49 PM
And the IQ quotient drops another 2% every time someone watches shiat like this.
 
2012-10-01 01:31:50 PM
Excuse me while I finacially suffer and am NOT a glaringly bad person and parent.

/God bless America
 
2012-10-01 01:33:04 PM
I've said this in every reality show thread I've posted in, and I will say it again: if you voluntarily watch more than 5 minutes of this garbage, fark you. For the good of America, do the decent thing and fellate a shotgun, you stupid, classless, feeble-minded imbecile.
 
2012-10-01 01:34:10 PM
It doesn't matter how much money you give those people - they will blow all of it and be right back where they started.

What the producers should do is set up a trust for the girl and keep her parents away from it.
 
2012-10-01 01:34:52 PM
This is Obama's fault.
 
2012-10-01 01:36:28 PM
Great. Maybe now they'll drown themselves in velveeta and mountain dew.
 
2012-10-01 01:38:06 PM

MorePeasPlease: The Onion nailed this.


Yup, I'm just wondering how long before I'll be able to add it to my list. I give it about a year.
 
2012-10-01 01:38:38 PM

Rapmaster2000: CynicalLA: There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.

[encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 300x168]

I admit to watching it for a minute, but in my defense I thought it was a Return of the Jedi reboot.


"The Hutts" would be a perfect name for the show.
 
2012-10-01 01:38:56 PM
I still think the family should be forcibly sterilized, but good on TLC for offering them a raise and offering to get them a better house when they saw the show was getting ratings. Usually networks would refrain from volunteering more money.
 
2012-10-01 01:40:29 PM
Sweet Jebus!

Somebody please go postal and shoot every single one of these soulless abominations.

Trust me, not a jury in the world would convict you.

You'd probably get a "do it again, free" card for the next lot of rejects they put in their place.

A MESSAGE MUST BE SENT!!!!!
 
2012-10-01 01:41:02 PM
What is this, a new breakfast cereal for kids?
 
2012-10-01 01:41:05 PM

rudemix: Ruthless Reviews Destroys Honey Boo Boo Show

This was posted by TappingTheVein in the last Honey Boo Boo thread. It should be posted in every thread. Brutally delicious review.


That's farking hilarious.
 
2012-10-01 01:41:48 PM
It's like we're being punished for finally getting Jersey Shore off the air.
 
2012-10-01 01:42:02 PM
They've won the game of life by the looks of it. Getting paid a ton of money to do nothing but be the redneck idiots they are. It's the American dream, isn't it? Why try hard in life when people like this make it with hardly trying at all? Sickening.

Perhaps their lives will be a warning to others....but i think i'm giving people too much credit.
 
2012-10-01 01:43:52 PM
Left Eye just rolled over in her Grave
 
2012-10-01 01:46:39 PM
So this Honey Boo Boo girl is like the larval stage of this woman, right?

www.dumpyourwifenow.com
 
2012-10-01 01:48:47 PM
Ugh...this crapola is why I'm ditching my cable.

/'cute' kid will go from cute to really frickin' annoying any day no....too late.
 
2012-10-01 01:48:50 PM
America can't have nice things because when people like Honey Boo Boo get paid $15k per episode to behave badly on national television, it watches.

It's all well and good to point at Honey Boo Boo and pretend it's the problem, but it wouldn't be on TV if there weren't enough idiots in this country turning on TLC to make it worth their while.

America gets stupid bullshiat "entertainment" because Americans are stupid. End of story.
 
2012-10-01 01:51:28 PM
We get it, they are white.

stop the hate.
 
2012-10-01 01:52:50 PM
Honey Boo Boo: where redneck and blackface meet up.
 
2012-10-01 01:53:03 PM

HKWolf: They've won the game of life by the looks of it. Getting paid a ton of money to do nothing but be the redneck idiots they are. It's the American dream, isn't it? Why try hard in life when people like this make it with hardly trying at all? Sickening.

Perhaps their lives will be a warning to others....but i think i'm giving people too much credit.


That's what's depressing about it all. Right now, as I'm typing this, I'm sitting in a LabCorp-like place waiting to get drug tested for a new job. Said new job is pretty much guaranteed to derail my aspirations of going back to school, since I have to work full-time. Despite the benefits and vastly increased pay I'm looking at, that last sentence is still hard to swallow.

Meanwhile, these fat, lethargic-looking freaks are getting paid megaton to show the world why considering Americans lazy and useless might just be a viable option after all.
 
2012-10-01 01:53:14 PM

karmaceutical: So this Honey Boo Boo girl is like the larval stage of this woman, right?

[www.dumpyourwifenow.com image 264x208]


No. Because from what little I see of that child, Honey Boo Boo at least has some pure, unadulterated joy in her.
 
2012-10-01 01:53:17 PM
That is a lot of Sketti!
 
2012-10-01 01:53:36 PM

El Freak: I've said this in every reality show thread I've posted in, and I will say it again: if you voluntarily watch more than 5 minutes of this garbage, fark you. For the good of America, do the decent thing and fellate a shotgun, you stupid, classless, feeble-minded imbecile.


If I fellate a shotgun, all I'm going to end up with is a wet shotgun. How does that make things better?

Also, imbecile and feeble-minded mean literally the exact same thing. You might try editing that post before you recycle it in the next reality show thread you post in to make sure people know you don't like reality shows.

Protip: As more and more media outlets are made available - cable tv, satellite, streaming video, torrents of both older and new television shows and movies - the ratio of quality shows per outlet drops simply because there are more options. Shows will be aired when there are hundreds of outlets that are available that would not be aired when there are a dozen outlets.

Protip Part II: Shows like Honey Boo Boo are made because they are extremely cheap to produce and make a lot of money. They are not made because they educate. TLC is running a business, not Shakespeare in the Park.

Protip Part III: You have the ability to control what you do or don't watch. If you don't like watching something, all you have to do is turn it off and then - speed is of the essence here - make sure everyone on the internet knows you don't like it. It is important here that you make sure they know you don't like it as well make sure they know you only watched five minutes - the standard amount of time to decide if something is good or not. Once you have turned it off and alerted the internet, you don't have to watch it anymore and you can go on about your life. Beware, though, anytime the show is mentioned on the interent again, you will need to make sure the internet remembers you don't like it, even though you don't watch it (cf. Saturday Night Live, The Simpsons)
 
2012-10-01 01:55:22 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: We get it, they are white.

stop the hate.


Everything you post is stupid, but even by your standards, this is pretty idiotic. You know for the most part the people on the show don't actually seem to be that terribly dysfunctional, right? That for the most part it's the scumbag producers who go out of their way to craft the narrative of the overweight, dysfunctional white-trash hillbilly to be sneered at, right? That TLC is intentionally exploiting these people, who may very well be perfectly normal otherwise, for their own twisted purpose, right?

I have to ask these questions because with you it's impossible to tell if you're just dumb as Styrofoam car engine or intentionally pretending to be.
 
2012-10-01 01:56:03 PM
So I was channel surfing the other day and saw a marathon of this in the guide. Having heard about it on Fark I figured I would at least see what it was.

I selected the channel and within 2 minutes I observed some of the most stomach turning TV I have ever seen. They took turns sitting blindfolded while the others blew their foul breath into the blindfolded one's face and they had to guess out of which decayed mouth the breath spewed from. I about hurled. In the same 3 minute skit, one of the fat chicks squirted piss (I hope) through her pants onto the couch.

I turned off the TV, paused for a minute to contemplate what I had seen, then went for a jog.

/CSB
 
2012-10-01 01:56:49 PM

CynicalLA: There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.


OK, the wife is a regular viewer. And I was forced to watch 90 minutes of it in exchange for sex (after 20 years of marriage a guy will do most anything. Who are you to judge me!!).

Yes, the show was as horrible. Not as bad as some other things I've been forced to watch. The Real Housewives of ... has GOT to be the worst show ever foisted upon us, as at least the hillbilly crowd now they are stupid or at last don't preen as if they are more intelligent than normal. The Real Housewives of ... are far stupider because while nominally being painfully stupid, THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT! Worse, they think they are intelligent.

I can tolerate stupid, in small doses, if it doesn't try and come off as something it's not. True stupidity, in not realizing how bone-achingly stupid you are while carrying on an air of moral and intellectual superiority is by far the worst crime of humanity, as it has caused so much pain in the world.

And before I forget, the wife also loves the 3 Stooges, South Park, and in spite of being in her mid-50's gets hit on by guys 35 years younger quite often. And no, you can't see pictures.
 
2012-10-01 01:57:01 PM

cig-mkr: And the IQ quotient drops another 2% every time someone watches shiat like this.


Wow, not just the intelligence quotient, but the intelligence quotient quotient? That's a pretty serious drop in IQ quotient.
 
2012-10-01 01:57:04 PM
I thought 'TLC' stood for 'The Learning Channel'... but it must say somewhere in the fine print that it really stands for learning what -not- to do.

/praying they never export this show - how embarrassing for the U.S. if its shown overseas
//also, make it illegal to export 'Real Housewives', 'Jackass', and any 'confession' show.
 
2012-10-01 01:57:37 PM

KatjaMouse: karmaceutical: So this Honey Boo Boo girl is like the larval stage of this woman, right?

[www.dumpyourwifenow.com image 264x208]

No. Because from what little I see of that child, Honey Boo Boo at least has some pure, unadulterated joy in her.


Yes, that is the joy that comes with having your every whim catered to. They all do, at first.
 
2012-10-01 01:58:32 PM
Honey boo boo don't care!
 
2012-10-01 01:59:13 PM
semi-threadjack

anyone ever seen "Rat Fink a boo boo"? I see a reboot with Honey and kin.
 
2012-10-01 01:59:17 PM
Good move on TLC's part. They're just ensuring that she'll die on camera before people lose interest.
 
2012-10-01 02:00:22 PM
Woo! All aboard the gravytrain boat!
 
2012-10-01 02:05:15 PM

LemSkroob: I still think the family should be forcibly sterilized, but good on TLC for offering them a raise and offering to get them a better house when they saw the show was getting ratings. Usually networks would refrain from volunteering more money.


The family was probably doing the show for the advancement of HBB Child's singing career and line of purses.
 
2012-10-01 02:05:48 PM

garandman1a: OK, the wife is a regular viewer. And I was forced to watch 90 minutes of it in exchange for sex (after 20 years of marriage a guy will do most anything. Who are you to judge me!!).

Yes, the show was as horrible. Not as bad as some other things I've been forced to watch. The Real Housewives of ... has GOT to be the worst show ever foisted upon us, as at least the hillbilly crowd now they are stupid or at last don't preen as if they are more intelligent than normal. The Real Housewives of ... are far stupider because while nominally being painfully stupid, THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT! Worse, they think they are intelligent.

I can tolerate stupid, in small doses, if it doesn't try and come off as something it's not. True stupidity, in not realizing how bone-achingly stupid you are while carrying on an air of moral and intellectual superiority is by far the worst crime of humanity, as it has caused so much pain in the world.

 
2012-10-01 02:07:00 PM
WHAT IN THE FARK IS A HONEY BOO BOO??
 
2012-10-01 02:07:25 PM

jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.


White Knighting Honey-Boo Boo? Thats gotta be a new low.

Seriously though they are staying where they are because the shows whole premise is poor white trash being poor white trash
 
2012-10-01 02:07:38 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: tenpoundsofcheese: We get it, they are white.

stop the hate.

the narrative of the overweight, dysfunctional white-trash hillbilly to be sneered at, right?


You refer to people that you don't even know as "white trash" and hillbilly

We get it, they are white.
and overweight.

and for some reason that has you hating them.

Really sad for you. Pathetic even.
Stop the hate.
 
2012-10-01 02:07:53 PM
The people in the show can at least say "We're getting paid to be like this". WTF do people who WATCH this crap say?

/Same for American Idol/The Voice/whatever other stupid reality shows are out there
 
2012-10-01 02:10:51 PM

Rapmaster2000: CynicalLA: There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.

[encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 300x168]

I admit to watching it for a minute, but in my defense I thought it was a Return of the Jedi reboot.


Bring me Solo and the Wookie!

Not that I felt bad to begin with, but I feel better knowing someone had the same thought I did.
 
2012-10-01 02:11:50 PM

Digitalstrange: jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.

White Knighting Honey-Boo Boo? Thats gotta be a new low.

Seriously though they are staying where they are because the shows whole premise is poor white trash being poor white trash


stop the racist attacks, this isn't what fark is about.
 
2012-10-01 02:11:50 PM
She'll need it. A lifetime of therapy ain't cheap.
 
2012-10-01 02:11:52 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: You refer to people that you don't even know as "white trash" and hillbilly


Great. Not only are you a moron, you're an illiterate moron.
 
2012-10-01 02:12:27 PM
Hey, neck crust remover costs money. 

/ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
 
2012-10-01 02:12:40 PM

Beerguy: WHAT IN THE FARK IS A HONEY BOO BOO??


This

media.salon.com cdn2.blogs.babble.com
 
2012-10-01 02:13:00 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: We get it, they are white.

stop the hate.


10/10
 
2012-10-01 02:14:27 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: tenpoundsofcheese: You refer to people that you don't even know as "white trash" and hillbilly

Great. Not only are you a moron, you're an illiterate moron.


You are the person who used the racially charged "white trash" label.
I am just quoting you.

Stop the racist attacks.
 
2012-10-01 02:14:30 PM
The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.
 
2012-10-01 02:16:26 PM

Dude O Matic 5000: The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.


Yeah, I just don't see that. I do see them buying the gate to Hammer's old manor, a la "The Simpsons" and having somebody fool with a welding torch until the gate goes from "HAMMER TIME" to "HAM TIME."
 
2012-10-01 02:18:40 PM
At least they are paying their own way, and were before they got the TV deal.

/I am shocked to learn that, but good for them...ummm him.
 
2012-10-01 02:20:24 PM

Dude O Matic 5000: The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.


Oh, I am sure that is the first thing they did....get financial advice. They seem to be all about wise and measured life choices.
 
2012-10-01 02:24:18 PM
As much as I find these people repellent , the show has millions of viewers and therefore they make the network a lot of money, so they "deserve" to be compensated. It's horrible but that's just how it is. If anyone is to be beaten to death, it's the network suits who spawned this idea in the first place, not the mutants they'e exploiting.

The audience will get sick of them soon enough and the'll plow through the money in good time. Then when the girl turns 13 they'll have have a reunion show with her giving birth right on stage. Circle of life.
 
2012-10-01 02:28:36 PM

Mugato: As much as I find these people repellent , the show has millions of viewers and therefore they make the network a lot of money, so they "deserve" to be compensated. It's horrible but that's just how it is. If anyone is to be beaten to death, it's the network suits who spawned this idea in the first place, not the mutants they'e exploiting.

The audience will get sick of them soon enough and the'll plow through the money in good time. Then when the girl turns 13 they'll have have a reunion show with her giving birth right on stage. Circle of life.


And it's at that point we call in the airstrike, right?
 
2012-10-01 02:30:19 PM

The Onion is prophetic: MorePeasPlease: The Onion nailed this.

Yup, I'm just wondering how long before I'll be able to add it to my list. I give it about a year.


Decided to check out your profile to see what else The Onion was right about. Didn't know Bush was the President in September of 2011, fascinating
 
2012-10-01 02:30:51 PM
I removed TLC from my TiVo because of this show. I encourage everyone reading this to do the same to their DVR.
 
2012-10-01 02:32:31 PM
You know what I just realized? The pageant show daughter looks exactly like the son from Pawn Stars.

sharetv.org
 
2012-10-01 02:33:58 PM

Dude O Matic 5000: The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.


Not a chance in hell. That money will be pissed away in a huge golden stream never to be seen again.
 
2012-10-01 02:36:24 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: You know what I just realized? The pageant show daughter looks exactly like the son from Pawn Stars.

[sharetv.org image 159x212]


HOLY CRAP!
 
2012-10-01 02:41:01 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: Vegan Meat Popsicle: tenpoundsofcheese: You refer to people that you don't even know as "white trash" and hillbilly

Great. Not only are you a moron, you're an illiterate moron.

You are the person who used the racially charged "white trash" label.
I am just quoting you.

Stop the racist attacks.


I have a policy of not putting anyone on ignore (you're a nice dark red instead), but you sure as hell are making me reconsider that.
 
2012-10-01 02:41:55 PM
I am also a reluctant viewer of the show. (My wife is a redneck.)

Honestly, given the choice of watching a family of poor people amuse themselves vs. the cast of your typical reality show cock-blocking each other to chase a prize... I find the hillbillies refreshing.
 
2012-10-01 02:47:02 PM

Evil Twin Skippy: I am also a reluctant viewer of the show. (My wife is a redneck.)

Honestly, given the choice of watching a family of poor people amuse themselves vs. the cast of your typical reality show cock-blocking each other to chase a prize... I find the hillbillies refreshing.


I'm not judging but you could decide not to watch any reality show at all. If enough people did that this shiat would end.
 
2012-10-01 02:50:15 PM
She'll end up doing BBW porn when she is old enough, and some of you will watch that.
 
2012-10-01 02:52:47 PM
what is honey boo boo and why do people watch it? its a young girl right, like 5 or 6 years old? she has her own show. okkkkk, so?
 
2012-10-01 02:53:05 PM
I think that's fair, that's still less than what she's going to have to pay for therapy and rehab later in life.
 
2012-10-01 02:55:48 PM

malaktaus: Hey, neck crust remover costs money. 

/ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn




I have never been more repulsed by a human being than I am by that fat sack of shiat. Neck crust? Really?
 
2012-10-01 02:57:01 PM

ArcadianRefugee: I had no idea what a 'Honey Boo-boo' was until about a week ago when a friend foisted it upon me.


So much this.

I hadn't seen it until SNL had a bit on mocking the creature and the mom a few weeks ago. I had heard mentions on fark but wrote it off to another meme I didn't care enough about to ask wtf it meant.

Then someone handed me their phone with a video queued up. It was like watching the gates of hell open before me.
 
2012-10-01 03:01:05 PM

rdu_voyager: tenpoundsofcheese: Vegan Meat Popsicle: tenpoundsofcheese: You refer to people that you don't even know as "white trash" and hillbilly

Great. Not only are you a moron, you're an illiterate moron.

You are the person who used the racially charged "white trash" label.
I am just quoting you.

Stop the racist attacks.

I have a policy of not putting anyone on ignore (you're a nice dark red instead), but you sure as hell are making me reconsider that.


Please, Fark loves that guy. Nothing makes people feel better than having someone to mock and feel superior to, amazingly tying this right into this thread since that is the exact same reason this show exists.

You aren't going to put him on ignore, just like people aren't going to stop responding to him and asking him serious questions in response to his derp. Even though every single time he ignores the well reasoned and rational responses to his derp and goes about his business of posting more derp.

And every time there's someone who manages to act outraged about it and threatens to put him on ignore, while 5 other people try to have a rational discussion with him or post links debunking his derp as if he gives a shiat. It's the circle jerk of life.
 
2012-10-01 03:01:32 PM

physt: Dude O Matic 5000: The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.

Not a chance in hell. That money will be pissed away in a huge golden stream Corral never to be seen again.


FTFY
 
2012-10-01 03:03:23 PM

MorePeasPlease: The Onion nailed this.


Ouch. Boy did they.
 
2012-10-01 03:10:24 PM

The Muthaship: At least they are paying their own way, and were before they got the TV deal.

/I am shocked to learn that, but good for them...ummm him.


Them. And by them I mean the four different babydaddies contributing to the household. Five if Baby Threethumbs's daddy is old enough to drop fries. And minus any who are unable to contribute due to incarceration.
 
2012-10-01 03:12:47 PM

namegoeshere: Them. And by them I mean the four different babydaddies contributing to the household. Five if Baby Threethumbs's daddy is old enough to drop fries. And minus any who are unable to contribute due to incarceration.


Vegas has the over/under on "Contributions from baby daddy's of Honey Boo Boo's skank ho kin" at $3.50.

/one time payment
//bet the under
 
2012-10-01 03:17:43 PM
Y'all better rednecognize. This is the future of entertainment.
 
2012-10-01 03:22:41 PM

Angry Buddha: Y'all better rednecognize. This is the future of entertainment.


Just getting closer to Idocracy in my opinion
 
2012-10-01 03:28:51 PM
s3-ec.buzzfed.com 

Georgian here, i hate what they've done to this little girl (i genuinely feel bad for her) - how she's become a representative of all the old stereotypes and bias against my home state (and the south in general). There are tons of people out there like her..the difference is not all of them have parents willing to whore out their daughter on camera for fame and fortune.
 
2012-10-01 03:29:14 PM
I'm proud to say that I have never seen 1 second of this bilge. The very title makes me throw up in my mouth a bit.
 
2012-10-01 03:32:14 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-10-01 03:32:28 PM
The best thing about all this is that it's on TLC...The Learning Channel. You literally couldn't make that up.
 
2012-10-01 03:32:29 PM
Link

Link

These articles seem to indicate the mamabeast has her head screwed on straight.

/Watched episodes
//Was entertained
///Got bored with it
 
2012-10-01 03:37:16 PM

Dr J Zoidberg: The Onion is prophetic: MorePeasPlease: The Onion nailed this.

Yup, I'm just wondering how long before I'll be able to add it to my list. I give it about a year.

Decided to check out your profile to see what else The Onion was right about. Didn't know Bush was the President in September of 2011, fascinating


....Oops. T'is corrected now, thanks :D
 
2012-10-01 03:38:56 PM

CynicalLA: There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.


If it wasn't for the Soup, Conan & Fark I would have never believed it was a real show. I've seen clips but never an actual episode on the network it airs.
 
2012-10-01 03:40:24 PM

Craptastic: Just think of all the gravy that kind of money can buy!


They don't need to buy gravy - Honey's mama can produce it for free by hooking her up to a milking machine.
 
2012-10-01 03:42:57 PM

IrateShadow: Great. Maybe now they'll drown themselves in velveeta and mountain dew.


From the looks of them, it seems they've been trying for quite some time.
 
2012-10-01 03:44:34 PM
Goddamn, you dorks find the dumbest shiat to biatch about.
 
2012-10-01 03:45:42 PM

garandman1a: OK, the wife is a regular viewer. And I was forced to watch 90 minutes of it in exchange for sex


seriously? wow. I kind of admire the lengths you are willing to go through, but there is not one woman in the world is worth that.
 
2012-10-01 03:51:12 PM
While I don't actually watch Honey Boo Boo, I do enjoy imagining the envy and fury at the House of Eden Woods.
 
2012-10-01 03:53:27 PM

WTF is this about? (goes through thread)

rudemix: Ruthless Reviews Destroys Honey Boo Boo Show
This was posted by TappingTheVein in the last Honey Boo Boo thread. It should be posted in every thread. Brutally delicious review.


Ah, one of these things.

I'm curious; how accurate are the ratings systems? I haven't run across anyone who watches these trashy reality shows since Growing Up Gotti, and even that was only watched sporadically. Could it be the logic in the ratings system has the simplest of flaws?

i.e. 4000 viewers of 10000 sample = 60% of available audience

The fallout from such a finding would be enormous; millions of dollars thrown away on pure turds, quality (or at least more palatable) programming cancelled due to poor ratings.

I don't know what competition is like shows such as Jersey Shore, Toddlers or Housewives (flavor A, B or C). Maybe it's no better than "Taking a Dump with Barney Rubble", but even that should earn at least 50% compared with the programs I've listed.

NOTE: Relative to serial programs such as Firefly, Seinfeld or Cougar Town, these reality shows are cheap to produce from both initial and on-going cost perspectives. Throw enough crap out there and the ROI of one thing can make up for losses by the others.
 
2012-10-01 03:54:47 PM

Expolaris: There are tons of people out there like her..


So, that's like, what, 8, 10 people?
 
2012-10-01 04:12:46 PM

EyeballKid: Expolaris: There are tons of people out there like her..

So, that's like, what, 8, 10 people?


Are we talking metric or imperial tons?
 
2012-10-01 04:14:24 PM
I see a big future for Honey Boo Boo as a Republican congresswoman.
 
2012-10-01 04:16:21 PM
cdn2.blogs.babble.com
4.bp.blogspot.com

And some people doubt the notion of reincarnation.
 
2012-10-01 04:23:01 PM
More reason for this:

i1.kym-cdn.com
 
2012-10-01 04:26:34 PM
God Damn it!

tenpoundsofretard


Here I thought you were just some ignorant pharktard, but you turned out to be a class 'A' troll. The political tab won't be the same knowing that you just arent some stupid backwoods tard.
 
2012-10-01 04:28:16 PM

MilesTeg: So I was channel surfing the other day and saw a marathon of this in the guide. Having heard about it on Fark I figured I would at least see what it was.

I selected the channel and within 2 minutes I observed some of the most stomach turning TV I have ever seen. They took turns sitting blindfolded while the others blew their foul breath into the blindfolded one's face and they had to guess out of which decayed mouth the breath spewed from. I about hurled. In the same 3 minute skit, one of the fat chicks squirted piss (I hope) through her pants onto the couch.

I turned off the TV, paused for a minute to contemplate what I had seen, then went for a jog.

/CSB


Wait. Really? Holy shiat, I had no idea it was that awful.
 
2012-10-01 04:31:00 PM

garandman1a: CynicalLA: There must be a few people on Fark who are regular viewers? You are not helping.

OK, the wife is a regular viewer. And I was forced to watch 90 minutes of it in exchange for sex (after 20 years of marriage a guy will do most anything. Who are you to judge me!!).

Yes, the show was as horrible. Not as bad as some other things I've been forced to watch. The Real Housewives of ... has GOT to be the worst show ever foisted upon us, as at least the hillbilly crowd now they are stupid or at last don't preen as if they are more intelligent than normal. The Real Housewives of ... are far stupider because while nominally being painfully stupid, THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT! Worse, they think they are intelligent.

I can tolerate stupid, in small doses, if it doesn't try and come off as something it's not. True stupidity, in not realizing how bone-achingly stupid you are while carrying on an air of moral and intellectual superiority is by far the worst crime of humanity, as it has caused so much pain in the world.

And before I forget, the wife also loves the 3 Stooges, South Park, and in spite of being in her mid-50's gets hit on by guys 35 years younger quite often. And no, you can't see pictures.


No. Not even a full bottle of Viagra would arouse me enough to have sex if I had just watched that crap.
 
2012-10-01 04:35:29 PM

bel4sucks: Goddamn, you dorks find the dumbest shiat to biatch about.


We learned it from watching you!
 
2012-10-01 04:37:28 PM

mr_bunny: Dude O Matic 5000: The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.

Oh, I am sure that is the first thing they did....get financial advice. They seem to be all about wise and measured life choices.


From a link provided above:

Another interesting tidbit from the story is that the family isn't spending the money they make from the show, instead putting it into four separate trusts for June Shannon's four kids.
 
2012-10-01 04:43:53 PM

jaylectricity: We learned it from watching you!


You would hear crickets chirping but even they are embarrased at that dumb shiat
 
2012-10-01 04:51:14 PM
People get so worked up over this show. I love it. Can't wait until it runs longer than the combined total of every Firefly and Arrested Development episode.
 
2012-10-01 05:04:28 PM
Dollar bills aren't edible, are they?
 
2012-10-01 05:09:47 PM

SockMonkeyHolocaust: People get so worked up over this show. I love it. Can't wait until it runs longer than the combined total of every Firefly and Arrested Development episode.


Six seasons and a movie!
 
2012-10-01 05:12:01 PM
What's weird is that I come from a southern family and have been around southerners/hillbillies all my life, but I literally can't understand what they're saying. It's like some weird hick/ghetto/learning disability accent spoken by a deaf person.
 
2012-10-01 05:14:09 PM
Isn't honey boo boo slightly retarded / slow?
 
2012-10-01 05:40:41 PM

Nadie_AZ: They say they watch because it makes them feel better about themselves.

 

There was a movie made in the late 60's entitled "They Shoot Horses, Don't They?". It was a film about the dance marathon contests during the Depression. People would pay money to come and see a bunch of people dance for hours and hours, trying to get the First-Place prize. Watching this tableau of desperate humanity shedding its dignity and self-worth seemed to make the paying customers feel better about their own wretched lives..... but only for a little while.

I wouldn't be surprised if every television producer out there has watched "They Shoot Horses, Don't They?" just to get some inspiration for their reality TV ideas.
 
2012-10-01 06:00:04 PM

Strolpol: I've had a sinking feeling that, millions of years from now, when alien archaeological expeditions uncover our civilization, that this show will be all they can find.


The reality is that they will think that disney was our pantheon. It exists on three different land masses, has huge replicated structures and giant statues.

It really does make you think what we totally misunderstand about ancient cultures.
 
2012-10-01 06:02:54 PM
She's going to be a spectacular ex-child star. I can't wait for "Honey Boo Boo goes to Rehab" on TLC.
 
2012-10-01 06:03:48 PM

AcneVulgaris: I can't wait for "Honey Boo Boo goes to Rehab" on TLC.


Coming in 2015
 
2012-10-01 06:07:46 PM
we may need a Honey Boo Boo haters gonna hate jpeg.
 
2012-10-01 06:20:30 PM
Hey, if you want results you gotta pay for 'em. Civilization ain't gonna decline itself.
 
2012-10-01 06:21:54 PM

The Muthaship: AcneVulgaris: I can't wait for "Honey Boo Boo goes to Rehab" on TLC.

Coming in 2015


Which way will it go? Meth addled bonehag, or morbidly obese oxy junkie? These are important questions!
 
2012-10-01 06:43:07 PM

ArcadianRefugee: I had no idea what a 'Honey Boo-boo' was until about a week ago when a friend foisted it upon me.

I know pray for the end times.


Meh, the kid is fine. Kids are supposed to like and do stupid shiat, that's how they grow up eventually.

It's everyone else involved in the show, from the mother to the producers to the audience, that needs to die for the good of the gene pool.
 
2012-10-01 06:55:12 PM

tenpoundsofcheese: We get it, they are white.

stop the hate.



We get it, you're a Troll. Stop the postings.
 
2012-10-01 06:57:10 PM

ArcadianRefugee: I had no idea what a 'Honey Boo-boo' was until about a week ago when a friend foisted it upon me.

I know pray for the end times.


Same boat...but now I know she's just some chubby kid birthed by some whale-like creature (her own fate, fyi). The whole family is fat (looks like genetics to me). I saw this on THE NEWS...THE F*CKING NEWS FER CHRISSAKE.

Not too many times have I wished painful, slow death on a 3-year-old but...here you have it.
 
2012-10-01 07:11:20 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-10-01 07:12:02 PM
I love this thread. I love how people come in here and bemoan the whole "reward the fail" mentality.

...while at the same time blissfully ignoring that this is exactly the product of the welfare state. Pay people to be fat, retarded cows who shoot out career felons, and really only serve as a democrap vote-breeding project.

Paying stupid people to be stupid is bad when it is the short-term of a few seasons. But it's totally okay when it is reinforced multi-generationally, right?

Keep rewarding the fail, America
 
2012-10-01 07:12:04 PM

DaCaptain19: ArcadianRefugee: I had no idea what a 'Honey Boo-boo' was until about a week ago when a friend foisted it upon me.

I know pray for the end times.

Same boat...but now I know she's just some chubby kid birthed by some whale-like creature (her own fate, fyi). The whole family is fat (looks like genetics to me). I saw this on THE NEWS...THE F*CKING NEWS FER CHRISSAKE.

Not too many times have I wished painful, slow death on a 3-year-old but...here you have it.


I don't blame the kid. She's a kid. I blame the network executives for exposing us to this.
 
2012-10-01 07:13:38 PM

cornbread and the collard greens: Isn't honey boo boo slightly retarded / slow?


I don't think so. She's no Mensa recruit, but she seems to have a brain in her head. Were she being raised in a family that valued education above teen pregnancy and Cheetos, she might do okay for herself.

Now the rest of the bunch...
 
2012-10-01 07:16:31 PM

SevenizGud: But it's totally okay when it is reinforced multi-generationally, right?


Who are you shouting at...?
 
2012-10-01 07:19:56 PM

DaCaptain19: The whole family is fat (looks like genetics to me).


You can't really blame genetics when the favorite family dinner is "sketti," white pasta topped with ketchup and margarine.
 
2012-10-01 07:22:53 PM

namegoeshere: You can't really blame genetics when the favorite family dinner is "sketti," white pasta topped with ketchup and margarine.


Okay, that's pretty funny.

...You're joking, right?

For the love of God, man, tell me you're joking!
 
2012-10-01 07:39:26 PM

Olympic Trolling Judge: namegoeshere: You can't really blame genetics when the favorite family dinner is "sketti," white pasta topped with ketchup and margarine.

Okay, that's pretty funny.

...You're joking, right?

For the love of God, man, tell me you're joking!


Nope. Did I mention that they also feed her a combination of Mountain Dew and Red Bull? I'm amazed the poor girl can blink after consuming that.
 
2012-10-01 07:42:39 PM

Olympic Trolling Judge: namegoeshere: You can't really blame genetics when the favorite family dinner is "sketti," white pasta topped with ketchup and margarine.

Okay, that's pretty funny.

...You're joking, right?

For the love of God, man, tell me you're joking!


No, horrifyingly enough - microwaved margarine, cut 50/50 with ketchup, dumped onto pasta.

I'm appalled that I know that - sure, it's from a previous FARK thread describing this nightmare, but still... I'm sure those glial cells could have something better to do than to help me remember that piece of trivia.
 
2012-10-01 07:44:41 PM

FuryOfFirestorm: Olympic Trolling Judge: namegoeshere: You can't really blame genetics when the favorite family dinner is "sketti," white pasta topped with ketchup and margarine.

Okay, that's pretty funny.

...You're joking, right?

For the love of God, man, tell me you're joking!

Nope. Did I mention that they also feed her a combination of Mountain Dew and Red Bull? I'm amazed the poor girl can blink after consuming that.


She blinks, all right - it's just that she blinks at a speed we can't see, thanks to fast-twitch muscle driven to the limits of neuropathy.
 
2012-10-01 07:51:05 PM
I'd let a TV network package me as a laughingstock for that kind of money. Since I'm neither inbred, tarded or whale-sized, I guess I'll have to continue to work for a modest living.
 
2012-10-01 07:52:32 PM

jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.


Honey Boo Boo doesn't have the same kind of appeal if she moves to a nice subdivision, gets professional nutrition advice and attends a decent school.
 
2012-10-01 08:04:17 PM

El Freak: I've said this in every reality show thread I've posted in, and I will say it again: if you voluntarily watch more than 5 minutes of this garbage, fark you. For the good of America, do the decent thing and fellate a shotgun, you stupid, classless, feeble-minded imbecile.


Now I am going to torrent and watch every episode
 
2012-10-01 08:07:35 PM

Olympic Trolling Judge: namegoeshere: You can't really blame genetics when the favorite family dinner is "sketti," white pasta topped with ketchup and margarine.

Okay, that's pretty funny.

...You're joking, right?

For the love of God, man, tell me you're joking!


No. No I'm not.

And you'll want to wash down your sketti with Honey Boo Boo lemonade. Which is made with 5 cups of sugar. Wait, did I say cups? I meant pounds. Five. Pounds. Of. Sugar.
 
2012-10-01 08:11:35 PM
Mama needs a beat down with a shovel.

Kid needs to be witness relocated to Haiti.

/Justice served.
//Who said life was fair?
///Or just send them both off to some cannibal island where they will end up on a spit whit apples stuffed in their mouths.
 
2012-10-01 08:26:18 PM
If this is true, they are being wildly underpaid.
 
I only saw the Toddlers and Tiaras bits that inspired the spinoff, and I think the kid is a comic genius. 
 
2012-10-01 08:34:58 PM

namegoeshere: And you'll want to wash down your sketti with Honey Boo Boo lemonade. Which is made with 5 cups of sugar. Wait, did I say cups? I meant pounds. Five. Pounds. Of. Sugar.


i.qkme.me
 
2012-10-01 09:07:45 PM

indylaw: jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.

Honey Boo Boo doesn't have the same kind of appeal if she moves to a nice subdivision, gets professional nutrition advice and attends a decent school.


I'm not talking about all that. I'm talking about TLC offering them a new house away from the railroad tracks and the family turning it down. TLC would be the one concerned about the appeal of the family, not the family itself.
 
2012-10-01 09:08:27 PM
when did we as a nation start giving attention to fat girls? arent there pretty skinny girls in theses pageants?
 
2012-10-01 09:15:42 PM

turtleking: when did we as a nation start giving attention to fat girls? arent there pretty skinny girls in theses pageants?


They are too busy gatting laid and keeping that to themselves,
 
2012-10-01 09:21:29 PM

jaylectricity: indylaw: jaylectricity: Nadie_AZ: Our country shouldn't reward attention whores

If they're attention whores why are they turning down new houses and appearances on shows to stay home and be a big part of their community? I'll bet a lot of that money goes to the neighborhood when all is said and done.

You might look down your nose at them, but they're real people.

Honey Boo Boo doesn't have the same kind of appeal if she moves to a nice subdivision, gets professional nutrition advice and attends a decent school.

I'm not talking about all that. I'm talking about TLC offering them a new house away from the railroad tracks and the family turning it down. TLC would be the one concerned about the appeal of the family, not the family itself.


As stupid as that family is, I'm sure that they realize that they're entertaining because they're absurd fat hillbillies.

While "sources" may say that they offered a nicer house to that family, TLC has an obvious PR advantage to sounding magnanimous. "We offered them a nice new house in a subdivision but they turned it down!" It makes TLC sound like they're not just exploiting a white-trash family for profit, while at the same time advertising that the family really are authentic goobers with the tacky Christmas displays and whatnot.
 
2012-10-01 09:28:29 PM

indylaw: While "sources" may say that they offered a nicer house to that family, TLC has an obvious PR advantage to sounding magnanimous. "We offered them a nice new house in a subdivision but they turned it down!" It makes TLC sound like they're not just exploiting a white-trash family for profit, while at the same time advertising that the family really are authentic goobers with the tacky Christmas displays and whatnot.


Fair enough.
 
2012-10-01 10:22:26 PM
The reason why America can't have nice things is because so many people watch Honey Boo Boo, not because that family is getting a larger slice of the huge pie that TLC makes from presenting the freakshow. Now the family (not each person, the family as a whole) are making just under what an unknown would make on a scripted show. Are they gross? Well, from what I have seen on The Soup, sure. But they are making a lot of people a lot of money, why shouldn't they get some of it?
 
2012-10-01 10:27:48 PM
To be fair, TLC was getting severe criticism for paying the family something like $2000 an episode, a fraction of what most of their reality "stars" are paid.
 
2012-10-01 10:30:08 PM
TLC isn't paying the family more out of compensation. They're guaranteeing a few more seasons. You give a hillbilly a year's wage per episode and you're going to get a lot of embarrassingly classic moments that will end up with TLC getting some free ratings and attention while these stupid assholes play to the camera and complete the downward spiral they were born into. And let's be honest, who really gives a shiat if these losers bite it after the show fades? It's all about milking the premise right up until it's not profitable, and nobody is going to give a shiat if some fatass baby dispenser needs to market her youngest child for money. The rest of the trainwreck is just more fuel for the fire.

At this point, we should just give in and call the show on what it's doing: accelerating the downfall of a bunch of people who were going to sit around sucking up air. When some of them start kicking off due to ATV/Miller High Life accidents, it's just going to be even funnier. Especially if the mom's shiatty leg rots off and causes her to faceplant at the Walmart, punctuated by a loud wet fart.

Let's face it: Americans are jerks. And when it comes to stupid hillbillies who can't even bathe, who the fark gives a shiat if they roll their Camaro or not?
 
2012-10-01 10:34:48 PM
I gotta say, though...TLC does a great show on those conjoined twins. They really show what big hearts the girl(s) have. I know they're trying to sell the "we're not going to let this slow us down" thing, but I think it's pretty genuine. They're pretty amazing. They went to college, paid one and a half tuition and got the same degree. They talked about wanting to get different degrees to be more diverse and rounded, but they realized the scheduling limitations of that idea.

Now they are getting hired to teach. At first they know they'll have to earn one salary. But maybe someday they can negotiate for more because they can do more than your average teacher. For instance, one of them can be grading papers while the other one monitors the students during a test.
 
2012-10-01 10:53:39 PM

Guntram Shatterhand: TLC isn't paying the family more out of compensation. They're guaranteeing a few more seasons. You give a hillbilly a year's wage per episode and you're going to get a lot of embarrassingly classic moments that will end up with TLC getting some free ratings and attention while these stupid assholes play to the camera and complete the downward spiral they were born into. And let's be honest, who really gives a shiat if these losers bite it after the show fades? It's all about milking the premise right up until it's not profitable, and nobody is going to give a shiat if some fatass baby dispenser needs to market her youngest child for money. The rest of the trainwreck is just more fuel for the fire.

At this point, we should just give in and call the show on what it's doing: accelerating the downfall of a bunch of people who were going to sit around sucking up air. When some of them start kicking off due to ATV/Miller High Life accidents, it's just going to be even funnier. Especially if the mom's shiatty leg rots off and causes her to faceplant at the Walmart, punctuated by a loud wet fart.

Let's face it: Americans are jerks. And when it comes to stupid hillbillies who can't even bathe, who the fark gives a shiat if they roll their Camaro or not?


Depends on what kind of Camaro we're talking about. If it's a first or fifth-gen, I may shed a tear...for the car.
 
2012-10-01 11:04:29 PM

SevenizGud: Keep rewarding the fail, America


Look, if you want somebody to buy you a month of TF, you'll have to be a little more direct.
 
2012-10-01 11:05:27 PM

Guntram Shatterhand: TLC isn't paying the family more out of compensation. They're guaranteeing a few more seasons. You give a hillbilly a year's wage per episode and you're going to get a lot of embarrassingly classic moments that will end up with TLC getting some free ratings and attention while these stupid assholes play to the camera and complete the downward spiral they were born into. And let's be honest, who really gives a shiat if these losers bite it after the show fades? It's all about milking the premise right up until it's not profitable, and nobody is going to give a shiat if some fatass baby dispenser needs to market her youngest child for money. The rest of the trainwreck is just more fuel for the fire.

At this point, we should just give in and call the show on what it's doing: accelerating the downfall of a bunch of people who were going to sit around sucking up air. When some of them start kicking off due to ATV/Miller High Life accidents, it's just going to be even funnier. Especially if the mom's shiatty leg rots off and causes her to faceplant at the Walmart, punctuated by a loud wet fart.

Let's face it: Americans are jerks. And when it comes to stupid hillbillies who can't even bathe, who the fark gives a shiat if they roll their Camaro or not?


Those are crackers.
 
2012-10-01 11:14:37 PM

jaylectricity: Now they are getting hired to teach. At first they know they'll have to earn one salary. But maybe someday they can negotiate for more because they can do more than your average teacher. For instance, one of them can be grading papers while the other one monitors the students during a test.


I doubt they're worried about it. Severely conjoined twins only eat for one and a bit, only need one bed, etc. They'll likely be fine on a single income.

Albeit having two different sets of credentials would have been awesome as hell if only for the deadpan joke potential.
 
2012-10-01 11:30:06 PM

Jim_Callahan: I doubt they're worried about it. Severely conjoined twins only eat for one and a bit, only need one bed, etc. They'll likely be fine on a single income.


But on the show they actually talked about it. I'm not just speculating here. There is no doubt that they've put some thought into it based on the words that came out of their mouths.
 
2012-10-02 12:21:51 AM

MorePeasPlease: The Onion nailed this.


..."An act of violence that, say, 10 or 15 years from now will make people who once watched my show say, "Oh my God, that's awful. What a sad and farked up little life she had. Well, that's what happens when someone is given that much attention and exposure at such an early age. It warps their mind and makes it impossible for them to develop into normal adults."

Those are words you will speak one day. And you're okay with that, right? You should probably be okay with that if you want to keep watching my show."

A rare non-satirical Onion piece.
 
2012-10-02 12:27:16 AM
Are we at the point yet where it's not hipsterish if you don't watch TV? As far as I can tell every show is trying desperately to make its channel's name ironic. The History Channel is nothing but shows about people selling their garbage, and the other night I flipped through the channels in a motel room and saw a show about mermaids on The Discovery Channel.

Fark every last thing about TV.
 
2012-10-02 01:16:00 AM

MilesTeg: So I was channel surfing the other day and saw a marathon of this in the guide. Having heard about it on Fark I figured I would at least see what it was.

I selected the channel and within 2 minutes I observed some of the most stomach turning TV I have ever seen. They took turns sitting blindfolded while the others blew their foul breath into the blindfolded one's face and they had to guess out of which decayed mouth the breath spewed from. I about hurled. In the same 3 minute skit, one of the fat chicks squirted piss (I hope) through her pants onto the couch.

I turned off the TV, paused for a minute to contemplate what I had seen, then went for wank.

/CSB


FTFTruth.
 
2012-10-02 01:21:40 AM
ignore the above, it was tasteless and badly-quoted.
 
2012-10-02 01:34:13 AM
If this was a minority family no one would be making the comments being said on here

This family is not as DerpCon 5 as that woman who was supporting Obama because "he give me free cell phone"
 
2012-10-02 02:08:26 AM

DancingElkCondor: If this was a minority family no one would be making the comments being said on here

This family is not as DerpCon 5 as that woman who was supporting Obama because "he give me free cell phone"


Yes. We must never forget the REAL victims of racism.
White people.
 
2012-10-02 02:44:24 AM

mr_bunny: Dude O Matic 5000: The problem with this all, is that by paying them you perpetuate their behavior. I've seen firsthand what happens when people go from poverty to 'BALLIN. It ain't pretty. Hopefully these folks have the foresight, or whoever is paying them, to get them a finance adviser.

Oh, I am sure that is the first thing they did....get financial advice. They seem to be all about wise and measured life choices.


Believe it or not, the mother was actually smart enough that most of the money is going into trust funds for the kids' educations.
 
2012-10-02 03:35:38 AM
I dropped my cable TV two years ago, so I know not a penny of my money is paying for this atrocity.
 
2012-10-02 07:03:57 AM

LouDobbsAwaaaay: Are we at the point yet where it's not hipsterish if you don't watch TV? As far as I can tell every show is trying desperately to make its channel's name ironic. The History Channel is nothing but shows about people selling their garbage, and the other night I flipped through the channels in a motel room and saw a show about mermaids on The Discovery Channel.

Fark every last thing about TV.


I think we hit that point when you needed to take out another mortgage to afford basic cable.
 
2012-10-02 07:52:17 AM
Psst - it's an act. It's as real as all other realty shows.
 
2012-10-02 09:05:45 AM
Remind me again what I'm missing by not watching TV anymore??
 
2012-10-02 12:15:54 PM
So glad I told Comcast to take their cable box and CableCards and stuff it.
 
2012-10-02 12:19:22 PM

otherginger: I see a big future for Honey Boo Boo as a Republican congresswoman.


Provided it lives to an electable age.
 
2012-10-02 01:08:36 PM
If June and the babydaddy really had that much love and respect for their children, why would they then turn around and exploit them like this?
 
2012-10-02 03:13:00 PM
am i the only one that thinks she's worth at least $ 1 MILION per episode. like charlie sheen does!
 
2012-10-02 04:39:37 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: You know what I just realized? The pageant show daughter looks exactly like the son from Pawn Stars.

[sharetv.org image 159x212]



Big Hoss Boo Boo.
 
2012-10-02 06:19:23 PM

fustanella: What is this, a new breakfast cereal for kids?


Honey Boo Boo Pops

How she dies or the name of her first porn movie when she turns 18?

/ I'm a bad, bad girl...shame on me
 
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