If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   It seems you can't even groom your wife to be a sex slave these days   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 312
    More: Strange, Missouri State, kinky sex, physical injury, BDSM, seriousness  
•       •       •

21992 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Oct 2012 at 12:54 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



312 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-10-02 01:00:53 AM  

thebigfarker: clyph I'll be looking forward to reading about you in a future thread after you're arrested for your unsafe, reckless, and probably non-consensual behavior. And then we all get to explain AGAIN why assholes like you aren't representative of (or welcome in) the organized BDSM community.

Are you really going through life beleiving there is only ONE BDSM community?


No

Again:

imgs.xkcd.com

That said, most of the serious educational/advocacy organizations are all loosely affiliated and generally play by the same set of rules. (BR, TES, Janus, etc)

The gay leathermen bar scene has some crossover with the mainline groups but they mostly do their own thing and have their own culture and customs.

The Goreans also do their own thing, mostly online.

Prodomme culture is a distinct branch, although many pro-dommes are also active in the advocacy/education community.

A lot of goth-y night clubs make an attempt at having a play space (or have some dungeon equipment for show) but there's little to no effort made for education and advocacy. IME the emphesis in these clubs is more on being seen in your fetish gear than actually playing.

Private playspaces all have their own unique vibe.

Lots of people are members of several of the sub-communities so there's a good bit of cross-pollenation and some general agreement on the difference between consensual BDSM and abuse.
So yes I think there is one community (or meta-community) with lots and lots of sub-groups.

At least that was the state of things a few years ago when I "retired" from the public scene. Mostly I just play with friends now and occasionally co-host private parties.
 
2012-10-02 01:58:59 AM  

clyph: The Goreans also do their own thing, mostly online.


The Goreans are also the ones that will scare most "vanilla" people. They're the closest you'll normally get to forced Total Power Exchange, and non-consensuality without going over the line into it.

The sad thing is, they're still less geeky than Star Trek fans.
 
2012-10-02 06:58:15 AM  

BronyMedic: The sad thing is, they're still less geeky than Star Trek fans.


Hey! It's not like we go around re-enacting the Spock mind-raping Valeris scene from ST6 or something! Well...not every day, anyway!

/For some reason, I read that as "Koreans", and wondered WTF I missed about Kim Jong Il and his offspring now...
 
2012-10-02 09:31:51 AM  

Magorn: If you've never expereinced it, it's hard to understand, but a healthy Dom Sub relationship is a lot like the realtionship of a drill sargeant to a recruit, From a distance it looks antagonistic and brutal, but the truth of it is that the sargeant is trying to better the recruit, make them stronger and more confident and tougher than they ever dreamed possible. Pushing limits, and pain tolerances and boundaries, when done right, shows a person that they can transcend thier self-imposed limits and be a person they've never imagined they were capable of being.


I've always really liked you, Magorn; though I have to let you know that my physically abusive ex boyfriend thought the above was exactly what he was doing FOR me... trying to make me a better person by using my face as a punching bag and breaking three of my ribs. If I cried, it was because I was weak and too sensitive, it was his duty to strengthen me up. The above, is what he had actually said to not only me but anyone who confronted him.

/if you knew me, you'd know I don't need to be strengthened.
//and no, I'm not a better person after that experience
 
2012-10-02 12:55:58 PM  

CapeFearCadaver: Magorn:

If you've never expereinced it, it's hard to understand, but a healthy Dom Sub relationship is a lot like the realtionship of a drill sargeant to a recruit, From a distance it looks antagonistic and brutal, but the truth of it is that the sargeant is trying to better the recruit, make them stronger and more confident and tougher than they ever dreamed possible. Pushing limits, and pain tolerances and boundaries, when done right, shows a person that they can transcend thier self-imposed limits and be a person they've never imagined they were capable of being.

I've always really liked you, Magorn; though I have to let you know that my physically abusive ex boyfriend thought the above was exactly what he was doing FOR me... trying to make me a better person by using my face as a punching bag and breaking three of my ribs. If I cried, it was because I was weak and too sensitive, it was his duty to strengthen me up. The above, is what he had actually said to not only me but anyone who confronted him.

/if you knew me, you'd know I don't need to be strengthened.
//and no, I'm not a better person after that experience


This. This exactly what I see as wrong with the idea Magorn propounds.
 
2012-10-02 01:22:10 PM  
What 50 Shades of Grey isn't about car interior color choice?
 
2012-10-02 01:51:12 PM  

CapeFearCadaver: Magorn: If you've never expereinced it, it's hard to understand, but a healthy Dom Sub relationship is a lot like the realtionship of a drill sargeant to a recruit, From a distance it looks antagonistic and brutal, but the truth of it is that the sargeant is trying to better the recruit, make them stronger and more confident and tougher than they ever dreamed possible. Pushing limits, and pain tolerances and boundaries, when done right, shows a person that they can transcend thier self-imposed limits and be a person they've never imagined they were capable of being.

I've always really liked you, Magorn; though I have to let you know that my physically abusive ex boyfriend thought the above was exactly what he was doing FOR me... trying to make me a better person by using my face as a punching bag and breaking three of my ribs. If I cried, it was because I was weak and too sensitive, it was his duty to strengthen me up. The above, is what he had actually said to not only me but anyone who confronted him.

/if you knew me, you'd know I don't need to be strengthened.
//and no, I'm not a better person after that experience


The other problem with the drill sergeant analogy is that military training is intentionally trying to dehumanize and break down critical independence. It is abusive too.

The critical test isn't about whether you end up with a better physique or habits, but whether you are actually empowering or de-empowering someone. If a person is doing what you tell them, even if those things are "better" choices than what they might do themselves, it actually isn't an improvement.
 
2012-10-02 01:56:56 PM  
Awesome... This lasted me all the way through lunch....

Thanks Fark!
 
2012-10-02 04:39:21 PM  
What? Anarchists have ethics?
 
2012-10-02 05:22:03 PM  

CapeFearCadaver: Magorn: If you've never expereinced it, it's hard to understand, but a healthy Dom Sub relationship is a lot like the realtionship of a drill sargeant to a recruit, From a distance it looks antagonistic and brutal, but the truth of it is that the sargeant is trying to better the recruit, make them stronger and more confident and tougher than they ever dreamed possible. Pushing limits, and pain tolerances and boundaries, when done right, shows a person that they can transcend thier self-imposed limits and be a person they've never imagined they were capable of being.

I've always really liked you, Magorn; though I have to let you know that my physically abusive ex boyfriend thought the above was exactly what he was doing FOR me... trying to make me a better person by using my face as a punching bag and breaking three of my ribs. If I cried, it was because I was weak and too sensitive, it was his duty to strengthen me up. The above, is what he had actually said to not only me but anyone who confronted him.

/if you knew me, you'd know I don't need to be strengthened.
//and no, I'm not a better person after that experience


Which is why I used the adjective "healthy". Your abusive ex is, like a lot of the abuse cases I've handled, a delusional coward. (I used to run the Dom Violence emergency protection order section PG County circuit court for 5 years). The key to playing the Dom-sub game is complete consent by both particpants, and an understanding in the back of your head that this IS a un-real thing, a fantasy space, a simulation of danger rather than the actual thing (much like bungie-jumping or skydiving the free fall is terrifying but in the back of your head you know that every precaution has been taken for your safety
 
2012-10-02 06:49:08 PM  
The issue that I have is this case has been going on for 3 years apparently. How much tax money has been spent so far? Talk about abuse, my taxes have sure been taking it dry!
 
2012-10-02 08:29:07 PM  

Kittypie070: What? Anarchists have ethics?


Some do...about the same amount as any other kind of person.
 
Displayed 12 of 312 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report