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(Huffington Post)   Butt-Chugging not all it's cracked up to be   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 103
    More: Followup, enemas, Vanderbilt University Medical Center, negligent homicide, NOFX, Pi Kappa Alpha, drug abuse prevention, recollections, Morristown  
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13079 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Sep 2012 at 4:17 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-29 05:00:56 PM  

The_Homeless_Guy: theflatline: I read the article.

1. Since when do you go to a hospital for alcohol poisoning do they check your butthole. Well I guess they saw the damage to his rectum when they cleaned him since he shiat his pants.
2. They were using Franzia, which would make sense for butt chugging.

Who the hell can get drunk on Franzia?

If they can't rule out trauma (which you generally can't on really drunk people) they will check out your bung hole to assess for rectal tone (loss of rectal tone is a bad thing).


I'm so glad we skipped that part when I was an EMT.
 
2012-09-29 05:04:06 PM  
Who thinks this is a good idea??? Not only can I get alcohol poisonng, but my guts probably feel like shiat, too. SIgn me up!
 
2012-09-29 05:07:20 PM  

The_Homeless_Guy: theflatline: I read the article.

1. Since when do you go to a hospital for alcohol poisoning do they check your butthole. Well I guess they saw the damage to his rectum when they cleaned him since he shiat his pants.
2. They were using Franzia, which would make sense for butt chugging.

Who the hell can get drunk on Franzia?

If they can't rule out trauma (which you generally can't on really drunk people) they will check out your bung hole to assess for rectal tone (loss of rectal tone is a bad thing).


What does a normal rectal tone sound like? I've been a tad squeeky today and I'm a little worried.
 
2012-09-29 05:08:46 PM  

theflatline: I read the article.

1. Since when do you go to a hospital for alcohol poisoning do they check your butthole. Well I guess they saw the damage to his rectum when they cleaned him since he shiat his pants.
2. They were using Franzia, which would make sense for butt chugging.

Who the hell can get drunk on Franzia?


Exactly! Thank you!
The alcohol in Franzia doesn't work like alcohol does in other drinks. If it's legitimate Franzia, the body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down. You won't get drunk at all.
 
2012-09-29 05:08:49 PM  

MoronLessOff: The_Homeless_Guy: theflatline: I read the article.

1. Since when do you go to a hospital for alcohol poisoning do they check your butthole. Well I guess they saw the damage to his rectum when they cleaned him since he shiat his pants.
2. They were using Franzia, which would make sense for butt chugging.

Who the hell can get drunk on Franzia?

If they can't rule out trauma (which you generally can't on really drunk people) they will check out your bung hole to assess for rectal tone (loss of rectal tone is a bad thing).

What does a normal rectal tone sound like? I've been a tad squeeky today and I'm a little worried.


The oil hasn't hit yet.
 
2012-09-29 05:09:31 PM  
www.nycopera.com

/Alcohol enemas?!?
//What a pain in the ass that must be.
 
2012-09-29 05:10:26 PM  
Has anyone blamed this epidemic on bath salts yet?
 
2012-09-29 05:11:38 PM  
the anus was unremarkable
 
2012-09-29 05:12:25 PM  
Heh, it was the pikes...
 
2012-09-29 05:13:09 PM  
Sadder buttweiser
 
2012-09-29 05:16:03 PM  
i51.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-29 05:17:53 PM  
Imagine my shock and surprise when a frat house in Tennessee is sticking hoses in each others asses.
 
2012-09-29 05:23:07 PM  
What happened to just drinking?
 
2012-09-29 05:25:10 PM  
Not as hot as vodka-soaked tampons.

i.imgur.com 

/with Wonder Bread, it seems
 
2012-09-29 05:26:20 PM  
LOL, why do frats have to be so homoerotic? I almost joined one because of the parties and the contacts you could make but after meeting some of them I realized I could just crash the parties and make contacts on my own.
 
2012-09-29 05:28:44 PM  
dontgetmestarted-lindasharp.typepad.com
 
2012-09-29 05:32:08 PM  
Heineyken
 
2012-09-29 05:32:48 PM  
and Guinnass
 
2012-09-29 05:33:30 PM  

LemSkroob: Is there a single thing that frats do that isn't homoerotic?


Date rape?
 
2012-09-29 05:42:33 PM  

Mugato: LOL, why do frats have to be so homoerotic? I almost joined one because of the parties and the contacts you could make but after meeting some of them I realized I could just crash the parties and make contacts on my own.


One of the first jokes I ever heard when I hit L.A.:

Q: What's another word for a straight UCLA frat boy?
A: Sober.
 
2012-09-29 05:47:17 PM  
Tennessee enema bandit?

Zappa approved!
 
2012-09-29 06:00:47 PM  

ZodiacMan: Ahhh, Pikes. Seriously, are fraternities and sororities even relevant anymore? I mean I get professional and service frats, etc, but it seems like the "sodomize pledges and date rape people" ones have kind of jumped the shark a long time ago.


did you go to college ? 10 - 40 thousand kids 18-24 yrs olds in one place with no jobs and hardly anything to do ? greek life will never go away until we have distributed online learning and no more universities.
 
2012-09-29 06:09:37 PM  

Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: Finally, someone discovers the only acceptable way to drink Coors.


I is cat. this are funny!!!
 
2012-09-29 06:11:21 PM  
blogs.browardpalmbeach.com

BTDT.
 
2012-09-29 06:17:18 PM  
Sad. Foolishness can have such tragic outcomes.
 
2012-09-29 06:18:14 PM  
Your flatulence; it's delicious. 2009 burgundy? I thought so. You reek splendid terroir.
 
2012-09-29 06:21:56 PM  

Nuclear Monk: The problem with butt chugging is that you eventually get the butt munchies.


I so rarely hit the funny button...
 
2012-09-29 06:22:33 PM  
The Toddster!
 
2012-09-29 06:26:19 PM  
"he denied having an alcohol enema. Police concluded otherwise from evidence they found at the frat house, including boxes of Franzia Sunset Blush wine."

lulz.com

/i'm going with hazing.
 
2012-09-29 06:36:01 PM  

CygnusDarius: Well...

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 400x301]

/I could drink that


That girl has the best ass that ever walked the Earth.
 
2012-09-29 06:36:09 PM  

drjekel_mrhyde: LemSkroob: Is there a single thing that frats do that isn't homoerotic?

This
/What straight male would stick a ping pong ball up another males anus


As I understand it, frats are where you start 'networking' as an 'old boy's club' so you have contacts for employment after college.

That explains nicely how the business community are nothing but a bunch of short-sighted, politician-bribing dicks.

We put the absolute worse people in "power" with this system.
 
2012-09-29 06:38:32 PM  

Boxcutta: "It is believed that members of the fraternity were utilizing rubber tubing inserted into their rectums as a conduit for alcohol,"

Fraternities!


euroross.blogspot.com

This guy has it in the wrong hole
 
2012-09-29 06:59:24 PM  

MoronLessOff: The_Homeless_Guy: theflatline: I read the article.

1. Since when do you go to a hospital for alcohol poisoning do they check your butthole. Well I guess they saw the damage to his rectum when they cleaned him since he shiat his pants.
2. They were using Franzia, which would make sense for butt chugging.

Who the hell can get drunk on Franzia?

If they can't rule out trauma (which you generally can't on really drunk people) they will check out your bung hole to assess for rectal tone (loss of rectal tone is a bad thing).

What does a normal rectal tone sound like? I've been a tad squeeky today and I'm a little worried.


Stay the hell out of Taco Bell.
 
2012-09-29 07:08:51 PM  

MoronLessOff: What does a normal rectal tone sound like? I've been a tad squeeky today and I'm a little worried.


Ass out of tune you say?

Has your ass gone flat? or sharp?
 
2012-09-29 07:21:51 PM  

Mugato: LOL, why do frats have to be so homoerotic?


Careful, if they catch you spreading blatant lies like that they might pull down your pants and stick things in your pooper.
 
2012-09-29 07:28:26 PM  
"most people had probably never heard of alcohol enemas"

"Alcohol enemas have been the punch lines of YouTube videos, a stunt in a "Jackass" movie and a song by the punk band NOFX called "Party Enema.""


Yeah, pretty sure most people have heard of it.
 
2012-09-29 07:32:15 PM  
Funnel goes where?
 
2012-09-29 07:38:03 PM  

MoronLessOff: What does a normal rectal tone sound like? I've been a tad squeeky today and I'm a little worried.


Normal tone is A natural.
 
2012-09-29 08:05:28 PM  

Day_Old_Dutchie: drjekel_mrhyde: LemSkroob: Is there a single thing that frats do that isn't homoerotic?

This
/What straight male would stick a ping pong ball up another males anus

As I understand it, frats are where you start 'networking' as an 'old boy's club' so you have contacts for employment after college.

That explains nicely how the business community are nothing but a bunch of short-sighted, politician-bribing dicks.

We put the absolute worse people in "power" with this system.


It does explain why politicians have no fears over butt-f*cking their constituents.
 
2012-09-29 08:17:54 PM  
It gets better.
 
2012-09-29 09:08:33 PM  
Students walking across campus this week generally responded with sighs and eye rolls when asked about the allegations

...or anything else.
 
2012-09-29 09:09:59 PM  

ubermensch: What will they think of next. Vodka soaked tampons?!


Say now! I like the cut of your jib, son.

We're having a little get-together tonight, feel free to stop by. Bring tampons.
 
2012-09-29 09:11:26 PM  
What a drunken asshole. I bet he ends up killing himself. Both his name *and* picture were published. He should at least go to another school and never speak of this again. Then again, I guess the alcohol enema could end up cleansing the gene pool long after it was administered. It probably wasn't the worst thing he's had up his ass the past week.
 
2012-09-29 09:12:50 PM  
What the hell happened to just drinking booze?
 
2012-09-29 09:53:05 PM  
To quote the article quiting UT cops, "He also had no recollection of losing control of his bowels and defecating on himself." Like that's a bad thing.

The last time I recall shiatting myself I was 10: taking an adult dose of Correctal wasn't a great idea in the first place, then my damn aunt wouldn't get out of my way so I could get to the bathroom on time. It sucks being too inhibited to yell "Step aside! I gotta shiat NOW!" (Of course it had to be MY fault, she was a psychology professor.) The experience was not fun, and I resolved then to avoid defecating on myself if I could help it, even if it meant getting arrested. ("It's really no big deal officer, a shiat was the only thing I took.")

Let's assume that the two times I ODed myself into the ICU my bowels and bladder also loosened; the 2nd time they told me I'd inhaled vomit and gotten pneumonia so they kept me unconscious for a while, but when you're choking on your own puke ordinary peepee and poopoo must be unremarkable. (At least it was MY puke.)

And Franzia Burgundy is kinda tasty, not bad for something that works out to less than $2.50 a bottle including tax. Franzia's web site doesn't say what grapes it uses for that, but the main grape in burgundies is usually pino noir -- one of the few reds that don't give me migraines though chugging it to get drunk still gives me hangovers. And it only costs a buck a box more than the Sunset Blush. Are frat boys incapable of having any taste?

In my day when teenagers wanted to get drunk very rapidly we chugged down things like Everclear and 151 rum. (Per os, mind you.) And we still managed to poison ourselves quite effectively. Kids today, I swear. Next they'll be snorting Drano or something.
 
2012-09-29 10:05:41 PM  
It's all over when the Franzia hits the anus.
 
2012-09-29 10:15:59 PM  
yet dooshbag frat boys wonder why people consider frat boys to be dooshbags. dooshbags coming from long lines of dooshbags. they associate with other dooshbags and they will live their lives in the company of other dooshbags. they would commit suicide if they had a clue.
 
rka
2012-09-30 12:02:00 AM  

Mugato: parties and the contacts you could make


What kind of parties and contacts could you make with a bunch of homoerotic butt chuggers?

Seriously. What kind of job were you hoping to get?
 
2012-09-30 01:45:51 AM  

Rufus Lee King: Guys, I'm a bit older than y'all are, I guess, but we didn't shove things in our dorm-mates asses. Things might be different these days.


That's what this gay lib leads to.
 
2012-09-30 02:03:30 AM  

Rufus Lee King: Listen, I know that "gay" stuff is supposed to be praised high unto Heaven these days.

When it turns fatal, though...

Might want to examine things again.


For some reason I imagine fraternities to be very homophobic on the sober dawn of Sunday.
 
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