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(Badass Digest)   Finally, a critical review of that long-ago filmed Red Dawn remake, for those nostalgic for the late '00s. Hey at least there's a montage   (badassdigest.com) divider line 92
    More: Silly, Fantastic Fest, Red Dawn, Josh Hutcherson, artistic inspiration, C. Thomas Howell, Josh Peck, remakes, Chris Hemsworth  
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4747 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 28 Sep 2012 at 1:03 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-28 01:16:45 AM
That was a real thing? I was hoping it was a suppressed memory... Like prison rape.
 
2012-09-28 09:41:40 AM

NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing? I was hoping it was a suppressed memory... Like prison rape.


Try to think of it as prison love.
 
2012-09-28 09:45:30 AM

NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing?


Sometimes I awake screaming "There is no way North Korea could actually mount an invasion of the Continental United States!".
 
2012-09-28 09:49:27 AM
The North Korean invading force in this version of the film actually used to be Chinese. Filmmakers went in and changed them digitally into Koreans in an effort to keep China from invading us in real life (or so my racist cinephile uncle tells me).


I've known several cinephiles, but never a racist one. Must make for some interesting conversations.
 
2012-09-28 10:07:19 AM

Ennuipoet: NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing?

Sometimes I awake screaming "There is no way North Korea could actually mount an invasion of the Continental United States!".


I find that change to be more irritating than it should be - the producers should have kept the bad guys as the chinese. that, at least, would have been somewhat believable.
 
2012-09-28 10:37:36 AM
Why the need to remake 80s classics that have no business being remade?

Loved the original movie as a kid, and even though i'll hate it, I'll see this craptastic film as well.

hotpopjunk.files.wordpress.com
2.bp.blogspot.com

1.bp.blogspot.com
media.washtimes.com
 
2012-09-28 10:52:02 AM

Weaver95: Ennuipoet: NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing?

Sometimes I awake screaming "There is no way North Korea could actually mount an invasion of the Continental United States!".

I find that change to be more irritating than it should be - the producers should have kept the bad guys as the chinese. that, at least, would have been somewhat believable.


I suspect the true reason was a Chinese investor or three.
 
2012-09-28 11:02:46 AM

NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing? I was hoping it was a suppressed memory... Like prison rape.


I caught the trailer. They make a big deal out of how North Korea "took out U.S. Central Command!"

I guess the writers never bothered to research what CENTCOM actually does.
 
2012-09-28 12:02:58 PM

Sgt Otter: NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing? I was hoping it was a suppressed memory... Like prison rape.

I caught the trailer. They make a big deal out of how North Korea "took out U.S. Central Command!"

I guess the writers never bothered to research what CENTCOM actually does.


"Research" is not the primary concern of the backers of this or the original.
 
2012-09-28 01:30:48 PM

Weaver95: Ennuipoet: NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing?

Sometimes I awake screaming "There is no way North Korea could actually mount an invasion of the Continental United States!".

I find that change to be more irritating than it should be - the producers should have kept the bad guys as the chinese. that, at least, would have been somewhat believable.


There is some vague, nebulous possibility that at some point in the future, the PRC might have the wherewithal to invade. The North Koreans couldn't possibly even invade a single state. Evar.
 
2012-09-28 01:32:52 PM

TheBeastOfYuccaFlats: Sgt Otter: NewportBarGuy: That was a real thing? I was hoping it was a suppressed memory... Like prison rape.

I caught the trailer. They make a big deal out of how North Korea "took out U.S. Central Command!"

I guess the writers never bothered to research what CENTCOM actually does.

"Research" is not the primary concern of the backers of this or the original.


Actually, the original was very well researched.
 
2012-09-28 01:32:58 PM
Thank goodness the film has good pace. Pace is the sole reason I shell out $10 for a ticket.
 
2012-09-28 01:36:56 PM
I'm going to watch it. Sorry. It's just going to happen. You can't stop me.
 
2012-09-28 01:45:17 PM

Mark Ratner: Why the need to remake 80s classics that have no business being remade?

Loved the original movie as a kid, and even though i'll hate it, I'll see this craptastic film as well.

[hotpopjunk.files.wordpress.com image 361x480]
[2.bp.blogspot.com image 430x293]

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x637]
[media.washtimes.com image 640x455]


one of these pics is not like the other one
 
2012-09-28 01:46:01 PM
He claims all asians look alike, but his uncle is the racist one.
 
2012-09-28 01:49:47 PM

dittybopper: The North Koreans couldn't possibly even invade a single state. Evar.


True. No one ever conquered wyoming from the left or from the right.

/obscure?
 
2012-09-28 01:50:32 PM
The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.
 
2012-09-28 01:54:24 PM

InmanRoshi: The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.


You forgot Cuba.

Don't forget Cuba.
 
2012-09-28 01:55:46 PM
The original is hilarious in its seriousness and lack of subtlety. Every political message is bashed over your head. It's a perfect piece of cold war paranoia. I love it.

AVENGE MEEEEEEEE!
 
2012-09-28 01:57:41 PM

InmanRoshi: The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.


I preferred "Invasion USA" where it's Chuck Norris vs. Nicaraguans, Cubans, Russians, Hippies, Black Street Gangs, Bikers, Drug Dealers, and Liberal College Professors.
 
2012-09-28 02:00:19 PM
Finally, a movie that will never be pirated. The MPAA must be pleased by this breakthrough.

/North Korea invades the US?
//Boolsheet..
///Also, Red Dawn didn't need to be remade.
////They got it right the first time.
 
2012-09-28 02:02:32 PM
I would say this remake is waaaaay off course
 
2012-09-28 02:04:15 PM

Broktun: InmanRoshi: The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.

You forgot Cuba.

Don't forget Cuba.


Never forget!

i148.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-28 02:05:59 PM

InmanRoshi: The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.


They put Baby in a corner. The consequences should have been obvious.
 
2012-09-28 02:09:55 PM

zerkalo: I would say this remake is waaaaay off course


What you did there, he sees it:

ts3.mm.bing.net

/Never saw it coming though.
 
2012-09-28 02:10:30 PM

wiwille: Broktun: InmanRoshi: The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.

You forgot Cuba.

Don't forget Cuba.

Never forget!

[i148.photobucket.com image 603x329]


Obama's Plan for America!

img247.imageshack.us
 
2012-09-28 02:15:19 PM
The chair is against the wall. John has a long mustache.
 
2012-09-28 02:16:25 PM

InmanRoshi: The outlandish premise that North Korea could invade the US really tarnishes the standard set by the gritty realism of the original where a few high school kids with deer rifles and no military training take down the Russian Army.


They didn't take down the Russian (actually Soviet) Army. They were wiped out within 6 months of the invasion, and within about a month of the Russians actually getting serious about going after them. They had some initial success against what we would call "Rear Echelon Mother-Farkers", ie., second-string Cuban troops, and Soviet political commissars, etc., But that didn't even start until a couple months after Calumet was invaded, so truthfully, they only lasted about 4 months of active fighting.

The only two who survive do so by running away to "Free America", and in fact if you think about their actions, other than tying down a platoon of Spetznaz troopers temporarily, they really didn't do all that much to effect the course of the war. They didn't even shut down the rail line, which is apparently why the Soviets took Calumet in the first place.

In other words, they did about as good as you could expect high school kids familiar with guns and the terrain could do.
 
2012-09-28 02:22:38 PM
Has anyone seen the Australian version made from the same novel?

Tomorrow: When The War Began Trailer

China invades Australia.

/Obligatory: Trailer includes scene of Chinese soldiers discovering Anne Frank in the backyard struggling with a water pump in a wet t shirt with Amelia Earhart.
 
2012-09-28 02:22:50 PM

EngineerAU: dittybopper: The North Koreans couldn't possibly even invade a single state. Evar.

True. No one ever conquered wyoming from the left or from the right.

/obscure?


Not obscure if you've ever seen cowboys on acid that look like Egyptian cartoons.

(And "Red Dawn" took place in Colorado.)
 
2012-09-28 02:25:10 PM

dittybopper: They didn't even shut down the rail line, which is apparently why the Soviets took Calumet in the first place.


They still killed a shiat ton of them. And took out a tank.
 
2012-09-28 02:26:33 PM

Mark Ratner: Why the need to remake 80s classics that have no business being remade?


Because nobody has any original ideas anymore...

Certain movies from the 80's were awesome, but can in NO WAY transition to the present. Footloose was one, and Red Dawn is another. Red Dawn can't transition because we don't have a believable invasion strategy anymore. The original Red Dawn's was at least somewhat feasible. Russia's military muscle, combined with Cuba's proximity worked ok... Besides, it was the 80's, we were supposed to be scared of the Russkies, no matter what. How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway? Either way, Red Dawn is not a movie that works now, and I wish they'd stop remaking this shiat justr as much as everyone who doesn't write for Hollywood... Besides, do they get to take on a HIND-D in this movie? I bet not... ;-)

It just really sucks that we are so screwed. The "entertainment" companies won't listen, so our movies will just get regurgitated, our shows will get shorter as they're filled with more commercials, and we'll have dancing bullshiat for other shows at the bottom 1/4 of our screen while trying to watch some farking other show.
 
2012-09-28 02:26:38 PM
I will give this one a pass but I am extremely excited to watch the direct to SyFy campfest knockoff.
 
2012-09-28 02:31:37 PM

Mikey1969: How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway?


static1.businessinsider.com

Followed up by these.

telcollc.com
 
2012-09-28 02:32:31 PM

cgraves67: He claims all asians look alike, but his uncle is the racist one.


No, I believe he is stating that they didn't bother to put much thought into CG'ing the NK faces on the soldiers, and left them very generic. He's actually faulting the filmmakers for making the soldiers all look the same.
 
2012-09-28 02:37:49 PM

Spare Me: Mikey1969: How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway?

[static1.businessinsider.com image 400x300]

Followed up by these.

[telcollc.com image 500x335]


I don't know if NK even has as many planes as appear in the pic, but at least there are plenty of shipping containers, although I don't know how many would survive that trip...
 
2012-09-28 02:39:57 PM

Mikey1969: Spare Me: Mikey1969: How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway?

[static1.businessinsider.com image 400x300]

Followed up by these.

[telcollc.com image 500x335]

I don't know if NK even has as many planes as appear in the pic, but at least there are plenty of shipping containers, although I don't know how many would survive that trip...


You dehydrate them first and then add water once you reach America. POOF! Insta-soldier.
 
2012-09-28 02:42:17 PM

thecpt: dittybopper: They didn't even shut down the rail line, which is apparently why the Soviets took Calumet in the first place.

They still killed a shiat ton of them. And took out a tank.


I'm singularly unimpressed. Like I said, rear echelon half-trained occupation troops. Look at the Cuban troops fixing/cutting telephone lines*: They are carrying FN-FALs**. At that period of time, that would have meant *RESERVE* Cuban troops. The Russians are obviously political or administrative troops, or those sent to the back rear for regrouping or as reserves.


*Can't remember which one it was.
**Which just goes to show how well researched that movie was. The easy thing to do would have been to arm them with AKs.
 
2012-09-28 02:47:13 PM
Murca good.

dauntlessmedia.net
 
2012-09-28 02:53:05 PM

splat the whale: I don't know if NK even has as many planes as appear in the pic, but at least there are plenty of shipping containers, although I don't know how many would survive that trip...

You dehydrate them first and then add water once you reach America. POOF! Insta-soldier.


All right, that's funny as Hell, points for you... I'll be chuckling all day at that image, kinda something from a Merrie Melodies/Looney Tunes WWII cartoon...
 
2012-09-28 03:07:18 PM

dittybopper: I'm singularly unimpressed. Like I said, rear echelon half-trained occupation troops. Look at the Cuban troops fixing/cutting telephone lines*: They are carrying FN-FALs**. At that period of time, that would have meant *RESERVE* Cuban troops. The Russians are obviously political or administrative troops, or those sent to the back rear for regrouping or as reserves.


*Can't remember which one it was.
**Which just goes to show how well researched that movie was. The easy thing to do would have been to arm them with AKs.


Yeah, Funny enough thats the one time you aren't supposed to use the FAL. But still, an occupation force is going to be trained much better (and equiped much better) than high schoolers who have to survive a winter of exposure in CO. Give the Wolverines some credit. What did you expect them to do? Single handedly defeat a garrison? Hijack Migs, fly to Moscow, flip the bird and drop little boy, fly back to havanna, and bomb Fidel with sadaam husein?

get real.
 
2012-09-28 03:08:51 PM

splat the whale: Mikey1969: Spare Me: Mikey1969: How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway?

[static1.businessinsider.com image 400x300]

Followed up by these.

[telcollc.com image 500x335]

I don't know if NK even has as many planes as appear in the pic, but at least there are plenty of shipping containers, although I don't know how many would survive that trip...

You dehydrate them first and then add water once you reach America. POOF! Insta-soldier.



like in the batman movie?
www.blogcdn.com
 
2012-09-28 03:10:39 PM

RoyBatty: Has anyone seen the Australian version made from the same novel?

Tomorrow: When The War Began Trailer

China invades Australia.

/Obligatory: Trailer includes scene of Chinese soldiers discovering Anne Frank in the backyard struggling with a water pump in a wet t shirt with Amelia Earhart.


Why was the water pump in a wet t-shirt?
 
2012-09-28 03:11:00 PM

Mikey1969: You dehydrate them first and then add water once you reach America. POOF! Insta-soldier.

All right, that's funny as Hell, points for you... I'll be chuckling all day at that image, kinda something from a Merrie Melodies/Looney Tunes WWII cartoon...

 

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
 
2012-09-28 03:11:47 PM

Mikey1969: Spare Me: Mikey1969: How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway?

[static1.businessinsider.com image 400x300]

Followed up by these.

[telcollc.com image 500x335]

I don't know if NK even has as many planes as appear in the pic, but at least there are plenty of shipping containers, although I don't know how many would survive that trip...


What people don't know is N Korean, the Koreans in general, have always been cannon fodder for the Chinese. Of course the N Koreans can't stage something like this, but the Chinese can running the N Koreans as "point".
 
2012-09-28 03:20:15 PM

Stavr0: Mikey1969: You dehydrate them first and then add water once you reach America. POOF! Insta-soldier.

All right, that's funny as Hell, points for you... I'll be chuckling all day at that image, kinda something from a Merrie Melodies/Looney Tunes WWII cartoon... 

[encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com image 259x194]


THAT'S why that was bouncing around in my head... I'd forgotten about that, thanks!
 
2012-09-28 03:25:27 PM

Spare Me: The chair is against the wall. John has a long mustache.


I still use these. At least my wife knows what I'm talking about...
 
2012-09-28 03:27:50 PM

stevetherobot: RoyBatty: Has anyone seen the Australian version made from the same novel?

Tomorrow: When The War Began Trailer

China invades Australia.

/Obligatory: Trailer includes scene of Chinese soldiers discovering Anne Frank in the backyard struggling with a water pump in a wet t shirt with Amelia Earhart.

Why was the water pump in a wet t-shirt?


The water pump was metal, and it's Austria famous for it's snow banks so the wet t shirt lets you grasp the hot handle?
 
2012-09-28 03:35:55 PM

Mcavity: splat the whale: Mikey1969: Spare Me: Mikey1969: How the Hell are these Chinese/North Koreans supposed to have made it to the US, anyway?

[static1.businessinsider.com image 400x300]

Followed up by these.

[telcollc.com image 500x335]

I don't know if NK even has as many planes as appear in the pic, but at least there are plenty of shipping containers, although I don't know how many would survive that trip...

You dehydrate them first and then add water once you reach America. POOF! Insta-soldier.


like in the batman movie?
[www.blogcdn.com image 584x318]


I just hope the NorKos use soft water instead of heavy water.
 
2012-09-28 03:36:53 PM

thecpt: Yeah, Funny enough thats the one time you aren't supposed to use the FAL. But still, an occupation force is going to be trained much better (and equiped much better) than high schoolers who have to survive a winter of exposure in CO. Give the Wolverines some credit. What did you expect them to do? Single handedly defeat a garrison? Hijack Migs, fly to Moscow, flip the bird and drop little boy, fly back to havanna, and bomb Fidel with sadaam husein?


I would watch that movie.
 
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