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(Chicago Trib)   Arash "Ash" Durrani, 26, restrained on United flight for aggressive behavior, to face federal charges of being a primitive screwhead   (chicagotribune.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, Durrani, Chicago, John Wayne Airport, flights  
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11460 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Sep 2012 at 1:32 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



78 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2012-09-27 11:06:06 AM  
Just wait until he's introduced to his cellmate's boomstick.
 
2012-09-27 11:30:09 AM  
DNRTFA. But I'll bet I know what it says, at least in part.

Prince is a Jehovah's witness now. So, he won't do songs like "Erotic City" or "Darling Nikki" anymore, since they conflict with his religion. So, for a guy that built most of his career on sex-injected funk/R&B, that doesn't leave much on the set list.

On top of that, many many years' worth of acrobatic dance moves have left his joints in crap shape, with his hips in particular pretty shot, and badly in need of replacement. Ironic, that. But of course, since Jehovah's witnesses can't have blood transfusions, surgery is pretty much out.

What I'm getting at here is that religion has ruined one more thing that used to be pretty awesome. And that sucks.
 
2012-09-27 11:31:03 AM  

MaxxLarge: DNRTFA. But I'll bet I know what it says, at least in part.

Prince is a Jehovah's witness now. So, he won't do songs like "Erotic City" or "Darling Nikki" anymore, since they conflict with his religion. So, for a guy that built most of his career on sex-injected funk/R&B, that doesn't leave much on the set list.

On top of that, many many years' worth of acrobatic dance moves have left his joints in crap shape, with his hips in particular pretty shot, and badly in need of replacement. Ironic, that. But of course, since Jehovah's witnesses can't have blood transfusions, surgery is pretty much out.

What I'm getting at here is that religion has ruined one more thing that used to be pretty awesome. And that sucks.



Wow, you REALLY didn't RTFA.
 
2012-09-27 11:39:03 AM  
cdn.breitbart.com

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.
 
2012-09-27 11:39:21 AM  
Christ. I need to get my eyes checked.
 
2012-09-27 12:42:39 PM  

Diogenes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 474x356]

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.


Not your type, huh?

I don't blame you. I never pegged you as a drunkendoucheosexual.
 
2012-09-27 01:11:53 PM  
"He grabbed my hair and lifted my head up and said, 'I want to kiss you,'"


you sure it wasn't this guy?

i.usatoday.net
 
2012-09-27 01:15:57 PM  

gilgigamesh: Diogenes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 474x356]

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.

Not your type, huh?

I don't blame you. I never pegged you as a drunkendoucheosexual.


He's easy enough on the eyes. A little too pretty and female assaulty for my tastes.
 
2012-09-27 01:35:44 PM  

MaxxLarge: DNRTFA. But I'll bet I know what it says, at least in part.

Prince is a Jehovah's witness now. So, he won't do songs like "Erotic City" or "Darling Nikki" anymore, since they conflict with his religion. So, for a guy that built most of his career on sex-injected funk/R&B, that doesn't leave much on the set list.

On top of that, many many years' worth of acrobatic dance moves have left his joints in crap shape, with his hips in particular pretty shot, and badly in need of replacement. Ironic, that. But of course, since Jehovah's witnesses can't have blood transfusions, surgery is pretty much out.

What I'm getting at here is that religion has ruined one more thing that used to be pretty awesome. And that sucks.


Nailed it on the head!
 
2012-09-27 01:35:50 PM  
who?
 
2012-09-27 01:38:05 PM  
What an ashhole.
 
2012-09-27 01:39:25 PM  
fashionbombdaily.com
 
2012-09-27 01:40:20 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com

NOT Groovy.
 
2012-09-27 01:42:57 PM  
"He grabbed my hair and lifted my head up and said, 'I want to kiss you,'" said another passenger, Nona Pitts.

You should be honoured, he used his smoothest move on you. Usually he just clubs women over the head and drags them back to his cave.

/heheheh, Pitts
 
2012-09-27 01:44:57 PM  
Arash "Ash" Durrani.
vanilla
Arash "Ash" Durrani.
Stop! collaborate and listen!
 
2012-09-27 01:45:43 PM  

Trivia Jockey: MaxxLarge: ...

Wow, you REALLY didn't RTFA.


TBH that was my, less eloquent, thought as well when I saw his name.
 
2012-09-27 01:45:52 PM  

Diogenes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 474x356]

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.


Ash, it's for you. Says his name is Pete Burns, something about wanting his old face back...
 
2012-09-27 01:46:19 PM  

olapbill: collaborate


Better not, that gets you sent to Gitmo.
 
2012-09-27 01:47:06 PM  
So, Ash was "unbelievably strong" huh? Hmmm...
i649.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-27 01:47:14 PM  
Listen you farkers you screwheads, here's a man who would not take it anymore, a man who stood up against the scum, the coonts, the dogs, the filth, the shiat. Here is someone who stood up.
 
2012-09-27 01:47:23 PM  
"I'm afaraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the plane."
 
2012-09-27 01:48:44 PM  
What's the word on Tandoor though?
 
2012-09-27 01:50:47 PM  

Rapmaster2000: [fashionbombdaily.com image 419x315]


"Well I saw this robbery coming a mile away, so I stuck my wedding ring up my ass".
 
2012-09-27 01:51:06 PM  
Why didn't they land in Denver or somewhere else and get him off the plane instead of going all the way to California?
 
2012-09-27 01:53:15 PM  

ImperialHazman: So, Ash was "unbelievably strong" huh? Hmmm...
[i649.photobucket.com image 400x266]


So you're saying boomstick = Knives, sharp sticks?
 
2012-09-27 01:56:17 PM  

doubled99: "I'm afaraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the plane."


Man, the bouncers in here are tough!
 
2012-09-27 02:00:24 PM  

uncleswifty: Why didn't they land in Denver or somewhere else and get him off the plane instead of going all the way to California?


They needed the extra 3 hours to let each passenger kick him in the nards (at least that what should have happened).
They guy was no longer a threat, so why make everyone late? Besides, with farking airline seats being so uncomfortable, I'm sure the guys who held him down were more comfortable anyway.

they bought their tickets... I say let 'em thrash!
 
2012-09-27 02:00:29 PM  
It's a trick. Get an axe.
 
zez
2012-09-27 02:00:48 PM  
www.istanbul.tc

I KISS YOU !!!!!
 
2012-09-27 02:00:54 PM  

I May Be Crazy But...: doubled99: "I'm afaraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the plane."

Man, the bouncers in here are tough!


...No ticket.
 
2012-09-27 02:05:31 PM  
I say that anyone who acts up on a plane like this should be taken off the flight and shot - immediately - in the back of the head.

/excepting, of course, if a medical condition was the cause of a fracas. By "medical condition" I do not mean "depression" or the like - I mean something like insulin shock or aneurism or the like.
 
2012-09-27 02:06:05 PM  
LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him
 
2012-09-27 02:06:36 PM  

Diogenes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 474x356]

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.


Kinda reminds me of Milli or Vanilli, I forget which one.
 
2012-09-27 02:08:07 PM  

Your Boss: They needed the extra 3 hours to let each passenger kick him in the nards (at least that what should have happened).


I'm picturing the scene in Airplane! with armed passengers lined up to beat some sense into the panicking woman.

i.ytimg.com
 
2012-09-27 02:10:26 PM  

Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him


RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?
 
2012-09-27 02:11:43 PM  

Huck Chaser: I May Be Crazy But...: doubled99: "I'm afaraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the plane."

Man, the bouncers in here are tough!

...No ticket.


Ooh, much better response.
 
2012-09-27 02:13:21 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-09-27 02:17:29 PM  

Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?


When you are a threat to other passengers. It's like an easier way of smashing his head into the window to knock him out.
 
2012-09-27 02:18:37 PM  
i174.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-27 02:19:38 PM  
whatever he took before the flight, he shouldn't take it again
 
2012-09-27 02:19:38 PM  

KangTheMad: It's like a easier less personally fulfilling way of smashing his head into the window to knock him out.


fixed
 
2012-09-27 02:20:48 PM  

MaxxLarge: Prince is a Jehovah's witness now. So, he won't do songs like "Erotic City" or "Darling Nikki" anymore, since they conflict with his religion. So, for a guy that built most of his career on sex-injected funk/R&B, that doesn't leave much on the set list.

What I'm getting at here is that religion has ruined one more thing that used to be pretty awesome. And that sucks.


Tell that to Cat Stevens
 
2012-09-27 02:21:55 PM  

Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?


Well as far as I know valium is in tablet form, not injectable. The article said that the doctor tried sedating him, which might mean that he attempted giving the guy the tablets to swallow; but it's not as if the doc pulled out a syringe and jammed it into his leg
 
2012-09-27 02:24:10 PM  

tortilla burger: Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?

Well as far as I know valium is in tablet form, not injectable. The article said that the doctor tried sedating him, which might mean that he attempted giving the guy the tablets to swallow; but it's not as if the doc pulled out a syringe and jammed it into his leg


There is indeed liquid injectable Valium (I believe). They use it in IV's. Now whether that's what they had is another issue.
 
2012-09-27 02:25:30 PM  
Just think of how bad this could have turned out if the TSA wasn't around.
 
2012-09-27 02:29:11 PM  

zez: [www.istanbul.tc image 213x668]

I KISS YOU !!!!!


Mahir! That dude was an Internet meme before Internet memes were even a thing!

/feeling a strange nostalgia for the Hampster (sic.) Dance
 
2012-09-27 02:31:46 PM  

i478.photobucket.com

 
2012-09-27 02:36:04 PM  

uncleswifty: Why didn't they land in Denver or somewhere else and get him off the plane instead of going all the way to California?


Had to get back to OC asap in order to beat the 405 traffic.
 
2012-09-27 02:36:56 PM  

Diogenes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 474x356]

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.


Criss Angel?
 
2012-09-27 02:40:23 PM  
Is he Iranian?

Persian Pride!
 
2012-09-27 02:53:14 PM  
TFA: "Durrani, who also goes by Ash, is listed as an actor in one movie that hasn't been released."

Is it "Desert Warrior"? Because that might explain why he was high as fark.
 
2012-09-27 02:53:21 PM  
Reached for comment, former Governor and Presidential candidate Mitt Romney (R) stated, "it's always scary when you hear about someone being aggressive on an airplane. If this was your house or business, you'd be able to throw them out, but on an airplane, there's no place to go, because the windows don't open. I don't know why they don't do that. It's a real problem. So it's very dangerous."
 
2012-09-27 02:53:34 PM  

KangTheMad: Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?

When you are a threat to other passengers. It's like an easier way of smashing his head into the window to knock him out.


I guess by that logic, it would be BETTER to just kick the guy into submission because we can't have people randomly knocking out crazy people on airplanes....

Or something.
 
2012-09-27 02:54:24 PM  
WeenerGord: "Tell that to Cat Stevens"

Hasn't everybody?
 
2012-09-27 02:56:25 PM  
You go by Ash. You should probably be held down with belts and injected with valium just on principle.
 
2012-09-27 03:02:51 PM  
Why aren't passenger jets equipped with either a few pairs of metal or plastic handcuffs?

If I took off my belt to help restrain a passenger, my pants would fall and I would probably get in trouble for indecent exposure of an abnormally large ass.
 
2012-09-27 03:05:30 PM  

mytdawg: tortilla burger: Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?

Well as far as I know valium is in tablet form, not injectable. The article said that the doctor tried sedating him, which might mean that he attempted giving the guy the tablets to swallow; but it's not as if the doc pulled out a syringe and jammed it into his leg

There is indeed liquid injectable Valium (I believe). They use it in IV's. Now whether that's what they had is another issue.


Only if the syringe is 3 oz or smaller.

/I'm guessing even a doctor couldn't bring a syringe onto an airplane these days.
 
2012-09-27 03:05:55 PM  

susler: Why aren't passenger jets equipped with either a few pairs of metal or plastic handcuffs?

If I took off my belt to help restrain a passenger, my pants would fall and I would probably get in trouble for indecent exposure of an abnormally large ass.



Giggity.
 
2012-09-27 03:07:48 PM  
He grabbed my hair and lifted my head up and said, 'I want to kiss you,'" said another passenger, Nona Pitts

Dead for Tax Reasons: "He grabbed my hair and lifted my head up and said, 'I want to kiss you,'"


you sure it wasn't this guy?

[i.usatoday.net image 245x211]


He went full Namath. You never go full Namath.
 
2012-09-27 03:12:41 PM  

WeenerGord: MaxxLarge: Prince is a Jehovah's witness now. So, he won't do songs like "Erotic City" or "Darling Nikki" anymore, since they conflict with his religion. So, for a guy that built most of his career on sex-injected funk/R&B, that doesn't leave much on the set list.

What I'm getting at here is that religion has ruined one more thing that used to be pretty awesome. And that sucks.

Tell that to Cat Stevens


Ooh baby it's a bad song!
 
2012-09-27 03:15:15 PM  

susler: Why aren't passenger jets equipped with either a few pairs of metal or plastic handcuffs?


As I've said all along, every person 21 years and older should be handed a stun gun as they board the plane.
 
2012-09-27 03:15:58 PM  

Huck Chaser: mytdawg: tortilla burger: Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?

Well as far as I know valium is in tablet form, not injectable. The article said that the doctor tried sedating him, which might mean that he attempted giving the guy the tablets to swallow; but it's not as if the doc pulled out a syringe and jammed it into his leg

There is indeed liquid injectable Valium (I believe). They use it in IV's. Now whether that's what they had is another issue.

Only if the syringe is 3 oz or smaller.

/I'm guessing even a doctor couldn't bring a syringe onto an airplane these days.


I'm guessing you are correct. Never mind the drugs etc...
 
2012-09-27 03:19:04 PM  

ImperialHazman: So, Ash was "unbelievably strong" huh? Hmmm...
[i649.photobucket.com image 400x266]


Yea im thinking meth or something along those "lines"
 
2012-09-27 03:38:38 PM  
www.maennerfrisuren.org

Looks like Chris Angel's Mindfreak routine is indeed trying to break new ground, moving from "street magic" to the never-before-attempted "airplane disturbance magic".

"Looks like I'm all tied up with your seatbelts- OR AM I???"

HOWEEDOODAT??
ZOMG- MINDFREAK!!!
 
2012-09-27 03:40:24 PM  
healthandfitnessarticle.org

Wanted for questioning.
 
2012-09-27 03:44:30 PM  

Oznog: [healthandfitnessarticle.org image 300x300]

Wanted for questioning.


Nice tits
 
2012-09-27 04:05:07 PM  

Diogenes: cdn.breitbart.com

Other sources claim he's a "model." Model asshole, maybe.


mynethome.net

He is clearly ripping off "Blue Steel"- you can't DO that!!
 
2012-09-27 04:07:24 PM  

WeenerGord: Oznog: [healthandfitnessarticle.org image 300x300]

Wanted for questioning.

Nice tits


Do not taunt the Dothraki!!
 
2012-09-27 04:09:58 PM  

susler: Why aren't passenger jets equipped with either a few pairs of metal or plastic handcuffs?


It would certainly add a whole new wrinkle for those interested in the Mile High Club.
 
2012-09-27 04:19:31 PM  

tortilla burger: Well as far as I know valium is in tablet form, not injectable


...has anyone told you that valium comes in an injectable format yet? No fool in his right mind is gonna try to blow-gun a pill down somebody's throat... maybe a witch doctor could...
I would bet you that the only reason the doctor did what he did because he knew he had some works full of goofy juice on his person.

/how very thoughtful, indeed.
 
2012-09-27 05:11:23 PM  

Oznog: WeenerGord: Oznog: [healthandfitnessarticle.org image 300x300]

Wanted for questioning.

Nice tits

Do not taunt the Dothracki!!


Is that what you call them? I didn't taunt them. I complemented them. Nice rack.
 
2012-09-27 05:24:31 PM  

Oznog: [healthandfitnessarticle.org image 300x300]

Wanted for questioning.


Ronin?
 
2012-09-27 08:34:46 PM  
What a dumb Ash.
 
2012-09-27 11:37:13 PM  
Maybe he wasn't administered the Valium tablet orally...
 
2012-09-27 11:43:59 PM  

SovietCanuckistan: Rapmaster2000: [fashionbombdaily.com image 419x315]

"Well I saw this robbery coming a mile away, so I stuck my wedding ring up my ass".


uphereoncloud9.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-28 03:54:12 AM  

mytdawg: tortilla burger: Rug Doctor: Alonjar: LOL at the doctor just happening to have valium on him

RIGHT? I like how that's buried at the end of the story. Also, since when can a passing doctor just shoot you up with drugs because he doesn't like the way you're acting? I mean, the guy deserved it, but what the fark?

Well as far as I know valium is in tablet form, not injectable. The article said that the doctor tried sedating him, which might mean that he attempted giving the guy the tablets to swallow; but it's not as if the doc pulled out a syringe and jammed it into his leg

There is indeed liquid injectable Valium (I believe). They use it in IV's. Now whether that's what they had is another issue.


Yes you can buy diazepam as a liquid. Yes airplane medical kits have syringes and emergency stocks of common drugs. And yes, its a very useful antiseizure drug. Because the last place you want someone seizing is on an airplane.
 
2012-09-28 12:06:48 PM  
Isn't there some kind of reaction certain people sometimes have to flight that causes them to wig out and act hostile/crazy? From the description of his behavior he sounds pretty irrational.
 
2012-09-28 12:43:16 PM  

Heron: Isn't there some kind of reaction certain people sometimes have to flight that causes them to wig out and act hostile/crazy? From the description of his behavior he sounds pretty irrational.


Depends on what they see when they look out the window.

24.media.tumblr.com
 
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