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(Breitbart.com)   In a move sure to solidify the female vote, Breitbart News comes out against performing oral sex on women, calling it "gross"   (breitbart.com) divider line 291
    More: Obvious, oral sex  
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5985 clicks; posted to Politics » on 27 Sep 2012 at 4:15 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



291 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-27 12:28:52 PM
By the way ladies, I love it.

/not single
 
2012-09-27 12:35:48 PM
i.imgur.com

/favorite thing to do with women
//not single either
///would seriously go to town on Ms. Silverman.
 
2012-09-27 12:37:21 PM
Inappropriate? Perhaps. Gross...HELL NO.
 
2012-09-27 12:53:49 PM
Also women, the GOP men want you to know, they faked orgasms with you everytime.
 
2012-09-27 12:55:18 PM
If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.
 
2012-09-27 12:57:44 PM
Just a little taste of the alternative ladies...
 
i586.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-27 01:00:37 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

 
2012-09-27 01:01:34 PM
I like to call it The Vagina Dialogues
 
2012-09-27 01:04:31 PM
...says someone who's either never tried it, had gross partner(s), or is in some sort of closet.
 
2012-09-27 01:04:54 PM
Definitely gay.
 
2012-09-27 01:09:59 PM
Good luck with that.

If God hadn't meant for man to eat pussy, it wouldn't have made it look so much like a taco...
 
2012-09-27 01:11:34 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


This is Breitbart. It's probably the former here.

/wide stance
 
2012-09-27 01:11:52 PM
As much as it pains me to say this... In Breitbart's defense, it was a crude comment directed towards Romney. Whether or not "gross" implies that the author is against it is a matter of definitions. Vulgar sexual question? Fair enough. Disgusting sexual question? He probably has sex missionary-style through a clean, white sheet.
 
2012-09-27 01:13:33 PM
I bet Mitt has one of his butlers take care of that for him, or possibly the pool boy.

P.S. You can't get an "A" in love if you can't pass the orals.
 
2012-09-27 01:14:23 PM
In my mind, a woman is like an all you can eat buffet. Pay the ten dollars, ignore the germ barrier, and dive right in.
 
2012-09-27 01:15:25 PM

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: In my mind, a woman is like an all you can eat buffet. Pay the ten dollars, ignore the germ barrier, and dive right in.


But use a dental dam just to be safe.
 
2012-09-27 01:16:17 PM
It is gross, nasty, messy and a ton of fun.

I cry for the person that doesnt like messy fun.
 
2012-09-27 01:17:24 PM
Add me to the list of Love to do it and not single. Too bad my wife isn't into it.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-09-27 01:18:53 PM

slayer199: Inappropriate? Perhaps. Gross...HELL NO.


Well, for the average wide stance Republican it's probably as gross as airport potty sex is to me. Different strokes and all that.
 
2012-09-27 01:22:36 PM

Hershey Highway Patrol: I bet Mitt has one of his butlers take care of that for him, or possibly the pool boy.

P.S. You can't get an "A" in love if you can't pass the orals.



I wouldn't be so sure.
 
 
2012-09-27 01:22:51 PM

ManateeGag: Add me to the list of Love to do it and not single. Too bad my wife isn't into it.


This is a problem I do not have.

/yum
 
2012-09-27 01:24:31 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


That's the thing I miss most about being with women.
 
2012-09-27 01:29:15 PM
Women are nuts... once you start to eat them, you can't stop.
 
2012-09-27 01:30:10 PM

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: As much as it pains me to say this... In Breitbart's defense, it was a crude comment directed towards Romney.


Aye. It was crude. Silverman deserves a good tongue lashing!
 
2012-09-27 01:31:02 PM

I_C_Weener: Hershey Highway Patrol: I bet Mitt has one of his butlers take care of that for him, or possibly the pool boy.

 
P.S. You can't get an "A" in love if you can't pass the orals.
 
 
I wouldn't be so sure.
 
 
That is weird.  I've posted this pic before.  But it didn't work last time. 
 
i586.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-27 01:31:56 PM
Dear Sara: That was immature and you should be stuck in detention(cause it was about at 8th grade humor level)

Dear Breibart: Please come out of the closet, you will be happier and will cause less damage.
 
2012-09-27 01:34:11 PM
???

What if the Onion was the real world, and every other media outlet was satire?

That makes as much sense as this blog.
 
2012-09-27 01:35:32 PM
Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.
 
2012-09-27 01:37:42 PM
Good lord, the comments on that page.
 
2012-09-27 01:39:20 PM

Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.


As long as you pray afterwords, it's all goo.
 
2012-09-27 01:39:55 PM

meat0918: Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

As long as you pray afterwords, it's all good.


Good, GOOD, not goo!
 
2012-09-27 01:41:02 PM

I_Am_Weasel: Aye. It was crude. Silverman deserves a good tongue lashing!


Ann Romney made it clear during the RNC how much she loved women. Maybe they could work something out.
 
2012-09-27 01:49:05 PM

Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.


I think it's OK if you cut a hole in a sheet and stick your tongue through it.
 
2012-09-27 01:54:36 PM
Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

If God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system.
 
2012-09-27 01:55:20 PM
I'd be okay with a guy not wanting to perform oral sex, as long as he didn't want oral sex performed on him. Because if you expect me to do something you are not willing to reciprocate, we're going to have a problem.

/thankfully doesn't have that problem
//neither does he
///slashies for sex
 
2012-09-27 02:01:09 PM

baka-san: Dear Sara: That was immature and you should be stuck in detention(cause it was about at 8th grade humor level)

Dear Breibart: Please come out of the closet coffin, you will be happier and will cause less damage so we can shoot your ass with a shotgun, you zombie bastard.


Fixed.
 
2012-09-27 02:07:51 PM

Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.


Ewwwwww.... I'm going to take you off my pink list, if you keep talkin' like that.
 
2012-09-27 02:10:17 PM

Cythraul: Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.

Ewwwwww.... I'm going to take you off my pink list, if you keep talkin' like that.


If I was going to live in denial, I was going to love the one I was with. Well. And I'm gooood ;-)
 
2012-09-27 02:10:48 PM
I have a TotalFark account, so I'm getting a kick...
 
2012-09-27 02:11:13 PM
I loved Sarah Silverman ever since she was on Star Trek: Voyager, even though she wasn't allowed to talk about eating pussy then.

And I had a bisexual girlfriend so I've had higher education on the subject. It's far from gross. Although I suppose it can be if you're with the wrong woman under the wrong circumstances.
 
2012-09-27 02:11:52 PM

Cythraul: Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.

Ewwwwww.... I'm going to take you off my pink list, if you keep talkin' like that.


Ok, I lol'd.
 
2012-09-27 02:12:26 PM

Diogenes: Cythraul: Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.

Ewwwwww.... I'm going to take you off my pink list, if you keep talkin' like that.

If I was going to live in denial, I was going to love the one I was with. Well. And I'm gooood ;-)


And now I"m doing the internet equivalent of "I can't hear you! Lalalalalalalala!"
 
2012-09-27 02:15:19 PM
The comments section is predictably hateful.
 
2012-09-27 02:22:29 PM
I guess everyone already realizes that they aren't calling eating pussy "gross". They are saying that Silverman is being inappropriate. And that's true, and an important part of her comedy act. Just another reason to never pay attention to any celebrities regarding politics. The race is real and not a part of her act.
 
2012-09-27 02:23:37 PM
Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.
 
2012-09-27 02:24:21 PM

MeinRS6: I guess everyone already realizes that they aren't calling eating pussy "gross". They are saying that Silverman is being inappropriate. And that's true, and an important part of her comedy act. Just another reason to never pay attention to any celebrities regarding politics. The race is real and not a part of her act.


But we should pay attention to breitbart.com?
 
2012-09-27 02:24:31 PM

Mugato: The comments section is predictably hateful.


I know foxnews had to get rid of their comments section, if you ever read them it was constant racism and bigotry and general hatefulness. These right wing derper sites should consider doing the same thing.
 
2012-09-27 02:25:38 PM

Headso: Mugato: The comments section is predictably hateful.

I know foxnews had to get rid of their comments section, if you ever read them it was constant racism and bigotry and general hatefulness. These right wing derper sites should consider doing the same thing.


Require a facebook login. Seems to work on calming the vitriol, since most of these types can't figure out to make an account with a fake name to use for commenting.
 
2012-09-27 02:26:05 PM

EnviroDude: Sandra Bernhart


Oh! I heard her tell of her earlier days when she and Leno were on the standup circuit. She said they used to hook up, and he was fond of handcuffs and spanking.

Now try and get that image out of your head!
 
2012-09-27 02:30:08 PM

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I_Am_Weasel: Aye. It was crude. Silverman deserves a good tongue lashing!

Ann Romney made it clear during the RNC how much she loved women. Maybe they could work something out.


I want to reiterate that during Ann's entire speech, I was waiting for a musical number to break out.
 
2012-09-27 02:32:56 PM
There's a video of Romney gleefully talking about how his company Bain destroys American companies for their own gain but here's a B-list comic making an off-color comment on Twitter. Those damn leftists.
 
2012-09-27 02:37:40 PM

TheBeastOfYuccaFlats: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I_Am_Weasel: Aye. It was crude. Silverman deserves a good tongue lashing!

Ann Romney made it clear during the RNC how much she loved women. Maybe they could work something out.

I want to reiterate that during Ann's entire speech, I was waiting for a musical number to break out.


I'm picturing something like The French Mistake from Blazing Saddles.
 
2012-09-27 02:45:48 PM
So then, it's like swimming?


/obscure?
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-09-27 02:48:29 PM

EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.


MeinRS6: I guess everyone already realizes that they aren't calling eating pussy "gross". They are saying that Silverman is being inappropriate. And that's true, and an important part of her comedy act. Just another reason to never pay attention to any celebrities regarding politics. The race is real and not a part of her act.


You sound gay. NTTAWWT
 
2012-09-27 02:48:52 PM
For some reason this thread is making me remember how much I wanted to bang the smart, nerdy brunette girl in "Real Genius".
 
2012-09-27 02:52:57 PM
Hot and funny AS ALWAYS. She's not on my TV enough.

cdn.breitbart.com
 
2012-09-27 02:58:05 PM

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Hot and funny AS ALWAYS. She's not on my TV enough.

[cdn.breitbart.com image 450x337]


Hot? You sure you don't need a stronger prescription on your glasses?
 
2012-09-27 03:04:15 PM
If it's gross than either the dude is gay or the girl needs to schedule an appointment to get it checked out. I've never even remotely considered it gross, love doing it in fact.

/single
//and SS is hot
 
2012-09-27 03:15:42 PM
Don't be too hard on the author. From a very young age, in Sunday school, they're taught that lard liquor is bad for you.
 
2012-09-27 03:20:47 PM

ManateeGag: Add me to the list of Love to do it and not single. Too bad my wife isn't into it.



Wow.  I've never met a woman who wasn't into it.
 
2012-09-27 03:22:14 PM

downstairs: ManateeGag: Add me to the list of Love to do it and not single. Too bad my wife isn't into it.


Wow.  I've never met a woman who wasn't into it.


I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.
 
2012-09-27 03:27:33 PM

I_Am_Weasel: Don't be too hard on the author. From a very young age, in Sunday school, they're taught that lard liquor is bad for you.


mattcbr.files.wordpress.com

Hmmmm.....lard liquor....ahhhrrllgghh....
 
2012-09-27 03:30:17 PM

Mugato: I loved Sarah Silverman ever since she was on Star Trek: Voyager, even though she wasn't allowed to talk about eating pussy then.


If she was, maybe the ratings wouldn't have been bad. I'd have tuned in to watch her and Jeri Ryan go at it.
 
2012-09-27 03:32:06 PM

EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.


Every once in a while I agree with you. this is one of those times.
 
2012-09-27 03:35:46 PM

Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.


Well there's your problem.
 
2012-09-27 03:38:01 PM

CommieTaoist: Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.

Well there's your problem.


You're right. Women are probably WAY better at it.
 
2012-09-27 03:43:48 PM

Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.


I was under the impression that biting too hard was a more frequent no-no....
 
2012-09-27 03:46:54 PM

abb3w: Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.

I was under the impression that biting too hard was a more frequent no-no....


LOL. My bad. I meant that I've only ever not been into it when the guy was just really bad at it.

So here are some tips for the guys out there: Sucking is okay. Some gentle nibbling is okay (NOT THE CLIT). Doing the ABC's is a clear winner every time. And don't try to use your tongue like a penis and shove it in the vag. It does NOTHING for us.
 
2012-09-27 03:58:10 PM
i219.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-27 04:01:34 PM

spman: Hot? You sure you don't need a stronger prescription on your glasses?


Rule #1: "If you don't like it you can't have any"

More for me.
 
2012-09-27 04:03:03 PM

Via Infinito: It does NOTHING for us.


It can if you use a repeating bottom to top motion from the edge to under the clit. Knew a chick in college who really liked that one.
 
2012-09-27 04:08:03 PM

Via Infinito: So here are some tips for the guys out there: Sucking is okay. Some gentle nibbling is okay (NOT THE CLIT). Doing the ABC's is a clear winner every time. And don't try to use your tongue like a penis and shove it in the vag. It does NOTHING for us.


Too many rules. I'll be downstairs watching football if you need me.
 
2012-09-27 04:18:44 PM
My god. If I could make sushi out of those things, I would get 5 Michelin stars.
 
2012-09-27 04:18:53 PM
Smells like fish, it's a dish, smells like cologne, leave it alone. -Jackie "F. Jackie" Martling
 
2012-09-27 04:19:00 PM
passionateconservative

Yeah, well, when you think about such things, put it out of your mind and think about your favorite hobby, molesting living room furniture.

Conservative zingers!
 
2012-09-27 04:19:39 PM
Pfft. I've been told I'm amazing at it.

/single
 
2012-09-27 04:20:48 PM
If girls are made of sugar & spice,
why do they taste like tuna?

i.ytimg.com
farm1.staticflickr.com
 
2012-09-27 04:22:05 PM
Don't you mean snatch the female vote?
 
2012-09-27 04:22:54 PM

Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.


Being a selfish asshole? ;)
 
2012-09-27 04:23:15 PM
That's right, ZombieFart, keep licking that red herring. Sandra Fluke is still not going to menstruate on you.
 
2012-09-27 04:23:21 PM
www.ukrecordshop.com

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.
 
2012-09-27 04:23:28 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

 
2012-09-27 04:23:35 PM

EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.


I'd eat Sarah Silverman. My dog wouldn't hump Sandra Bernhard's leg
 
2012-09-27 04:24:13 PM

ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.


Atlanta businessmen who travel to Shanghai disagree.
 
2012-09-27 04:25:02 PM

DancingElkCondor: EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.

I'd eat Sarah Silverman. My dog wouldn't hump Sandra Bernhard's leg


I would too, but if she was rocking the "Take This Waltz" fro, I'd bring a Flowbee for some pre-muff dive manicuring.
 
2012-09-27 04:25:44 PM
It *CAN* be gross... if the woman is a farking skank.

I guess we know the kind of broads the folks at Breitbart.com are used to being with.
 
2012-09-27 04:27:46 PM

I_C_Weener: Hershey Highway Patrol: I bet Mitt has one of his butlers take care of that for him, or possibly the pool boy.

P.S. You can't get an "A" in love if you can't pass the orals.


I wouldn't be so sure.


he probably hires someone to watch as well
 
2012-09-27 04:28:14 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

Who here has 'earned' them?
 
2012-09-27 04:28:21 PM

ferretman: If girls are made of sugar & spice,
why do they taste like tuna?

[i.ytimg.com image 480x360]
[farm1.staticflickr.com image 640x480]


Jiro doesn't dream of that type of sushi..
 
2012-09-27 04:28:26 PM
I bet Sarah Silverman has a GIANT, untamed '70s bush.
 
2012-09-27 04:28:38 PM
First the ABCs, then alef-bet, then Cyrilic, then Roman numerals up to C. Then a short rest. Then Googling for other lettering systems.


cdn.breitbart.com
 
2012-09-27 04:28:48 PM

EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.


She's not one of my favs, but that was just cruel.
 
2012-09-27 04:29:02 PM

Via Infinito: You're right. Women are probably WAY better at it.


Damn straight. Well... Not straight, but... Oh, you know what I mean.
 
2012-09-27 04:31:02 PM

JerkStore: I bet Sarah Silverman has a GIANT, untamed '70s bush.


According to the movie where she appeared naked. yes, yes she does. And I would go on safari in that jungle.
 
2012-09-27 04:32:04 PM
One of my favorite things in the bedroom. It's not even entirely about the dive itself, it's the lead-up. The part where you get to open with a kiss, then slowly trail kisses down her front, exploring every part of her on the way down, until you reach your final destination. Glorious.

Via Infinito: Doing the ABC's is a clear winner every time.

Always a favorite, but personally, I prefer to actually spell out words and sentences. Makes it more spontaneous than the pattern of the ABCs. Probably doesn't make a practical difference, but it's just a thing I do.
 
2012-09-27 04:32:23 PM

Via Infinito: And don't try to use your tongue like a penis and shove it in the vag. It does NOTHING for us.


You should spend an evening with the last two women I've slept with (at the same time...I'll be in my bunk). Try that last one, and once your ears stop ringing (from the screaming O) and the blood returns to your head (from the thigh-clamping), let me know if you still believe that.

PROTIP: Women are built differently. About the only physiologically consistent thing is the parts. How they react to the same stimulus can vary greatly. Which is why I'm trying to get a comprehensive list of all sexual behaviors supported/rejected by women, one at a time.

// celebrated giver of oral
// a bi chick told me I could give some lesbians a run for their money
// she may just have been flattering me (post-coital compliments are notoriously exaggerated)
 
2012-09-27 04:32:26 PM

Gyrfalcon: Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.

Being a selfish asshole? ;)


It's always been my understanding girls like that, too.
 
2012-09-27 04:33:09 PM

hugram: Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

If God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system.


I tend to only be with women who bathe.
 
2012-09-27 04:34:06 PM

Kazrath: hugram: Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

If God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system.

I tend to only be with women who bathe.


Prima donna.
 
2012-09-27 04:34:40 PM

spman: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Hot and funny AS ALWAYS. She's not on my TV enough.

[cdn.breitbart.com image 450x337]

Hot? You sure you don't need a stronger prescription on your glasses?


forums.pelicanparts.com

www.anecdotoff.com

So how far in the closet are you?
 
2012-09-27 04:37:15 PM

Somacandra: [i.imgur.com image 496x89]

/favorite thing to do with women
//not single either
///would seriously go to town on Ms. Silverman.


i0.kym-cdn.com

/nothing better than going down on a woman
 
2012-09-27 04:37:51 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


This.
 
2012-09-27 04:38:12 PM
I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?
 
2012-09-27 04:38:57 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


seeing who this is coming from, this is 100% correct
 
2012-09-27 04:39:36 PM

Somacandra: [i.imgur.com image 496x89]

/favorite thing to do with women
//not single either
///would seriously go to town on Ms. Silverman.


Hmmm....you must be from Wisconsin if you love cheese that much :/

www.viprumor.com


/Gross, unless you are older than 50 I guess
 
2012-09-27 04:39:59 PM
Sarah Silverman? No. Like the Stephen Lynch song says, I just prefer black girls, the brown girls, the café au lait. Caramel girls and mocha girls just blow me away.~
 
2012-09-27 04:42:25 PM

ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.


It is hard to talk about this kind of thing without looking like a total asshole, but it seems like other people must run into this and I never get to talk about it in real life because I would look like an asshole then too and at least here I'm largely anonymous. Anyways, given the "other stereotype" about black guys, how is it possible that they don't go down on girls? I don't have a huge penis, but it's big enough that I basically can't have sex with a girl unless I go down on them first (or they masturbate) or I use a ton of lube. That is doubly true if I am not using a condom. Sometimes you can work it in if they're horny, but it's more of a pain in the ass then just going down on them. Lots of women must have lots of microtears or something.
 
2012-09-27 04:43:10 PM

ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.


Yeah I'll say it: I need that shirt in my life.

/Not vulgar
//just advertising
 
2012-09-27 04:44:08 PM

Spindle: JerkStore: I bet Sarah Silverman has a GIANT, untamed '70s bush.

According to the movie where she appeared naked. yes, yes she does. And I would go on safari in that jungle.


Hmmmm...enticing. Can I join in?

/doesn't mind a good safari
 
2012-09-27 04:44:27 PM

coeyagi: ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.

Atlanta businessmen who travel to Shanghai disagree.


Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.

/good times
 
2012-09-27 04:45:53 PM

DeltaPunch: coeyagi: ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.

Atlanta businessmen who travel to Shanghai disagree.

Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.

/good times


You sure it wasn't that she douched herself properly?
 
2012-09-27 04:46:10 PM

ferretman: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x183]

Who here has 'earned' them?


Got my wings, I'm a dog, I've eaten every kind of nasty
 
2012-09-27 04:46:42 PM

Kazrath: hugram: Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

If God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system.

I tend to only be with women who bathe.


The 'e' makes all the difference doesn't it now?
 
2012-09-27 04:47:05 PM

HotWingConspiracy: I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?


I love going downtown, but I don't do browntown.
 
2012-09-27 04:48:03 PM

DeltaPunch: Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.


I've personally never noticed a difference from their diet alone, but a lazy diet can indicate lazy bathing habits. Sounds like Lil' Miss Junk Food just didn't like washing herself where it mattered.
 
2012-09-27 04:48:58 PM

Last Man on Earth: One of my favorite things in the bedroom. It's not even entirely about the dive itself, it's the lead-up. The part where you get to open with a kiss, then slowly trail kisses down her front, exploring every part of her on the way down, until you reach your final destination. Glorious.


weknowmemes.com
 
2012-09-27 04:49:12 PM
The author of that shiatty blog post couldn't find a woman's clit with a map and a compass. And anybody who is incapable of locating a woman's clit has no business having sex, with anyone.
 
2012-09-27 04:51:34 PM

Last Man on Earth: One of my favorite things in the bedroom. It's not even entirely about the dive itself, it's the lead-up. The part where you get to open with a kiss, then slowly trail kisses down her front, exploring every part of her on the way down, until you reach your final destination. Glorious.


i0.kym-cdn.com

There something magical about slowly going down on her, touching and caressing her in the right spots along the way.
 
2012-09-27 04:51:57 PM

Fluorescent Testicle: DeltaPunch: Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.

I've personally never noticed a difference from their diet alone, but a lazy diet can indicate lazy bathing habits. Sounds like Lil' Miss Junk Food just didn't like washing herself where it mattered.


Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.
 
2012-09-27 04:52:10 PM

Amurica...Fark Ya!: /Gross, unless you are older than 50 I guess


You've never actually had sex with a woman, have you?
 
2012-09-27 04:52:22 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


We're done here.
 
2012-09-27 04:52:52 PM
Cunning linguist here...
 
2012-09-27 04:54:14 PM
www.mediaite.com
i'm with Black Bart - yuk!
 
2012-09-27 04:54:15 PM

HotWingConspiracy: I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?


Tongue-punching-the-fart-box.....all is fun during sexy time.
 
2012-09-27 04:54:49 PM
the trick is to jam your face down as hard as you can and rub your nose back and forth in her coochy
 
2012-09-27 04:55:23 PM
Run that by this guy.

imageshack.us
 
2012-09-27 04:55:33 PM

HotWingConspiracy: I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?


There taint a wrong way to go about it.
 
2012-09-27 04:55:34 PM
One of my favorite things about eating pussy, besides the obvious, is going around all the next day with the residuals in my mustache, so I can turn my top lip upwards so that my mustache is right under my nose and taking a long SNIFFFFF.

Good stuff...Mrs. ZIF approves as well!
 
2012-09-27 04:55:46 PM

Fluorescent Testicle: Amurica...Fark Ya!: /Gross, unless you are older than 50 I guess

You've never actually had sex with a woman, have you?


Nope, never. The two children my wife and I have were made by me jerking off on her p*ssy and just letting it sit there for a while.

/dumbf*ck
 
2012-09-27 04:56:07 PM

sprawl15: the trick is to jam your face down as hard as you can and rub your nose back and forth in her coochy


Or you can play hide the "g" spot with her.
 
2012-09-27 04:56:22 PM

zappaisfrank: One of my favorite things about eating pussy, besides the obvious, is going around all the next day with the residuals in my mustache, so I can turn my top lip upwards so that my mustache is right under my nose and taking a long SNIFFFFF.

Good stuff...Mrs. ZIF approves as well!


Flavor-saver....
 
2012-09-27 04:56:50 PM

ferretman: HotWingConspiracy: I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?

Tongue-punching-the-fart-box.....all is fun during sexy time.


scrapetv.com
/Sometimes in the heat of the moment...
 
2012-09-27 04:57:14 PM
this belongs in the business or sports tab!!!

or one of those confusing both catagories so that you start in the business tab but you are returned to the sports.
 
2012-09-27 04:57:20 PM

Rwa2play: DeltaPunch: coeyagi: ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.

Atlanta businessmen who travel to Shanghai disagree.

Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.

/good times

You sure it wasn't that she douched herself properly?


Nope... college-aged girls, showered regularly, no additional douching.
 
2012-09-27 04:57:39 PM

Amurica...Fark Ya!: Fluorescent Testicle: Amurica...Fark Ya!: /Gross, unless you are older than 50 I guess

You've never actually had sex with a woman, have you?

Nope, never. The two children my wife and I have were made by me jerking off on her p*ssy and just letting it sit there for a while.

/dumbf*ck


Oh well that's one interesting way of having kids.

/and by "interesting" I mean "boring"
 
2012-09-27 04:58:27 PM
I wonder if it is just the conservative blogs talking about this. I bet the liberal blogs are going on and on about Sarah's jokes. Either that or the 47 percent video.
 
2012-09-27 04:58:34 PM

Amurica...Fark Ya!: Fluorescent Testicle: Amurica...Fark Ya!: /Gross, unless you are older than 50 I guess

You've never actually had sex with a woman, have you?

Nope, never. The two children my wife and I have were made by me jerking off on her p*ssy and just letting it sit there for a while.

/dumbf*ck


I bet she is really hot. 

/not
 
2012-09-27 04:59:51 PM

Expolaris: ferretman: HotWingConspiracy: I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?

Tongue-punching-the-fart-box.....all is fun during sexy time.

[scrapetv.com image 565x368]
/Sometimes in the heat of the moment...


You know that's NOT what the term "ass-to-mouth" means, right?
 
2012-09-27 05:00:28 PM
i.cdn.turner.com

"Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I'm going to cut your farking throat."
 
2012-09-27 05:00:54 PM
You think Rush Limbaugh eats pussy?
 
2012-09-27 05:01:27 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-09-27 05:02:17 PM
www.blogcdn.com
 
2012-09-27 05:03:13 PM

the_vegetarian_cannibal: Expolaris: ferretman: HotWingConspiracy: I thought we all moved on to analingus while we tweak the vag. Am I out of the loop?

Tongue-punching-the-fart-box.....all is fun during sexy time.

[scrapetv.com image 565x368]
/Sometimes in the heat of the moment...

You know that's NOT what the term "ass-to-mouth" means, right?

I herped so hard i derped. Always had those 2 mixed up in terms of terminology. A rather "interesting" google search corrected me. Thanks!
 
2012-09-27 05:03:24 PM

Last Man on Earth: One of my favorite things in the bedroom. It's not even entirely about the dive itself, it's the lead-up.


Particularly when you drag it out as long as possible. Of course, you have to be careful not to go TOO long and end up getting kicked in the balls out of frustration, but done right...

/this is the thread where we brag about how much we like going down on women in hopes of BIE, right?
 
2012-09-27 05:03:53 PM
You know how everyone says that they would disappoint so hard?

My thought is why disappoint them? Just ask them to sit back, wrap their thighs around your head, and tell them to enjoy the ride.
 
2012-09-27 05:04:15 PM
beardsandbooze.files.wordpress.com

Would even bang her on shabbas
 
2012-09-27 05:04:32 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

 
2012-09-27 05:05:11 PM
B'Barty expressing his closeted rage from beyond the grave again.
 
2012-09-27 05:05:13 PM
BREAKING NEWS: COMEDIAN MAKES JOKE

More at 11
 
2012-09-27 05:06:23 PM
Breitbart News comes out against performing oral sex on women, calling it "gross"

Well maybe the way YOU do it.
 
2012-09-27 05:07:11 PM

Clutch2013: You know how everyone says that they would disappoint so hard?

My thought is why disappoint them? Just ask them to sit back, wrap their thighs around your head, and tell them to enjoy the ride.


I really need to stop farking on mobile.

That first sentence should read "...disappoint random hot celeb so hard."
 
2012-09-27 05:07:36 PM

baka-san: Dear Sara: That was immature and you should be stuck in detention(cause it was about at 8th grade humor level)

Dear Breibart: Please come out of the closet, you will be happier and will cause less damage.


I don't think it's in anybody's interest for gay zombie Britbart to come out of his buried horizontal closet..
 
2012-09-27 05:10:07 PM
I'm definitely pro-vagitarianism
 
2012-09-27 05:10:22 PM

DeltaPunch: coeyagi: ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.

Atlanta businessmen who travel to Shanghai disagree.

Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.

/good times


The vegetarian I dated in HS had a definite taste - not too strong - but definitely not "mild". The vegetarian I'm dating now has almost no perceptible taste.

So I don't think there's a definite rule, but diet certainly plays a part in taste (same is true for guys, though all my evidence for that is second-hand).
 
2012-09-27 05:12:44 PM
They may get the womens vote.... But they lost mine.
 
2012-09-27 05:13:46 PM

Mugato: I loved Sarah Silverman ever since she was on Star Trek: Voyager, even though she wasn't allowed to talk about eating pussy then.

And I had a bisexual girlfriend so I've had higher education on the subject. It's far from gross. Although I suppose it can be if you're with the wrong woman under the wrong circumstances.


I was eating oatmeal and raisins when I read your post.
 
2012-09-27 05:13:54 PM

Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.


Confused now.

Every other queer I know puts ... THAT as the thing they hated the most about being with women. The only time when they couldn't close their eyes and pretend they were with a guy.

But hey - no complaints. Whatever works for you.

(And presumably that inclination speaks well of your general approach to making whoopie, so keep up the good work.)
 
2012-09-27 05:14:05 PM
Tweeting crude comments about Mitt Romney to gain some attention - and distract us from Obama's disastrous economy.

It resulted in a Breitbart article and 359 comments.

Looks like it worked on both counts, dipshiat.
 
2012-09-27 05:14:52 PM
Sara is horribly unfunny, but very nice looking.
 
2012-09-27 05:15:46 PM

EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.


And Mitt Romney is to politics.
 
2012-09-27 05:16:04 PM

Coco LaFemme: I'd be okay with a guy not wanting to perform oral sex, as long as he didn't want oral sex performed on him. Because if you expect me to do something you are not willing to reciprocate, we're going to have a problem.

/thankfully doesn't have that problem
//neither does he
///slashies for sex


Oh no, that is almost a given for me. I *want* to go down on a woman, no hesitation.
 
2012-09-27 05:16:44 PM
 
2012-09-27 05:17:13 PM

Via Infinito: abb3w: Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.

I was under the impression that biting too hard was a more frequent no-no....

LOL. My bad. I meant that I've only ever not been into it when the guy was just really bad at it.

So here are some tips for the guys out there: Sucking is okay. Some gentle nibbling is okay (NOT THE CLIT). Doing the ABC's is a clear winner every time. And don't try to use your tongue like a penis and shove it in the vag. It does NOTHING for us.


Um... Maybe not you, but that is one of Mr. Dawg's and my favorite things.

/going to my bunk
 
2012-09-27 05:17:44 PM
Question for the author, is rimjob still OK?

/My guess is, he is OK with it.
 
2012-09-27 05:18:45 PM

TheBeastOfYuccaFlats: For some reason this thread is making me remember how much I wanted to bang the smart, nerdy brunette girl in "Real Genius".


OMG I had forgotten about her.
 
2012-09-27 05:20:17 PM

Rwa2play: You sure it wasn't that she douched herself properly?


If she douches, she's not "properly" doing anything. Well, unless her goal is to increase risks for infection, then she's doing quite well.


EnviroDude: Sarah Silverman is to comedy what Sandra Bernhart is to beauty.


Mostly unappealing, but sometimes really freaking funny/hot? Yeah, I agree.
 
2012-09-27 05:20:28 PM

Dr Dreidel: So I don't think there's a definite rule, but diet certainly plays a part in taste (same is true for guys, though all my evidence for that is second-hand).


Hey, you can lick it off either hand, depending on your preference.
 
2012-09-27 05:22:36 PM
This is not the "hot button" issue you were looking for.
 
2012-09-27 05:23:55 PM

Via Infinito: abb3w: Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.

I was under the impression that biting too hard was a more frequent no-no....

LOL. My bad. I meant that I've only ever not been into it when the guy was just really bad at it.

So here are some tips for the guys out there: Sucking is okay. Some gentle nibbling is okay (NOT THE CLIT). Doing the ABC's is a clear winner every time. And don't try to use your tongue like a penis and shove it in the vag. It does NOTHING for us.


Depends on the woman (shocking, I know). I've had some women who *hated* the ABC thing and some who thought the tongue in the vag was freaking awesome.
 
2012-09-27 05:24:19 PM

Rambino: Diogenes: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

That's the thing I miss most about being with women.

Confused now.

Every other queer I know puts ... THAT as the thing they hated the most about being with women. The only time when they couldn't close their eyes and pretend they were with a guy.

But hey - no complaints. Whatever works for you.

(And presumably that inclination speaks well of your general approach to making whoopie, so keep up the good work.)


I think part of it is that I'm sexually adventurous, regardless of the pieces parts on my partners. I liked the excitement and feeling of power I had when getting a woman off really good with my mouth. My weener is average so I play to my strengths :-p
 
2012-09-27 05:26:17 PM

Teufelaffe: Via Infinito: abb3w: Via Infinito: I've only ever not been into it when he sucked at it.

I was under the impression that biting too hard was a more frequent no-no....

LOL. My bad. I meant that I've only ever not been into it when the guy was just really bad at it.

So here are some tips for the guys out there: Sucking is okay. Some gentle nibbling is okay (NOT THE CLIT). Doing the ABC's is a clear winner every time. And don't try to use your tongue like a penis and shove it in the vag. It does NOTHING for us.

Depends on the woman (shocking, I know). I've had some women who *hated* the ABC thing and some who thought the tongue in the vag was freaking awesome.


Yeah, we're all different. I just think that the soft pliable tongue is great for some things, but penetration isn't one of them. I guess I just like hard cock for that. YMMV.
 
2012-09-27 05:30:27 PM

ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.


How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.
 
2012-09-27 05:31:42 PM
"We find this so objectionable that we are going to make sure more people see it"

So she's reduced to playing the female shock jock...

I'm sorry, did Breitbart's ghost just criticize shock jocks? Where the hell the "conservative movement" be without radio assholes (including female shock jocks)?
 
2012-09-27 05:32:45 PM

rufus-t-firefly: TheBeastOfYuccaFlats: For some reason this thread is making me remember how much I wanted to bang the smart, nerdy brunette girl in "Real Genius".

OMG I had forgotten about her.


I had too, but only for a short while. My lust wanes but never abates.
 
2012-09-27 05:33:24 PM
I'm glad Breitbart finally decided to hire a man of color.
 
2012-09-27 05:34:48 PM

Lionel Mandrake: Where the hell the "conservative movement" be without radio assholes (including female shock jocks)?


better off?
 
2012-09-27 05:35:16 PM
"comes out" indeed

Not that it's surprising. A conservative mind always imagines what they could be getting out of something if they're making someone else feel good. Giving pleasure to someone else is the antithesis of their entire worldview.
 
2012-09-27 05:35:19 PM
Any comedienne who sings a song in three part harmony with one mic pointing at her ass and another pointing at her vagina is ok in my book.
 
2012-09-27 05:35:44 PM

Diogenes: Now try and get that image out of your head!


Chin goes where?
 
2012-09-27 05:36:27 PM

Via Infinito: Yeah, we're all different. I just think that the soft pliable tongue is great for some things, but penetration isn't one of them. I guess I just like hard cock for that. YMMV.


From a purely technical standpoint, getting the tongue down into the vag at the beginning of the session is a good way to spread the lubricating moisture around to the other areas, so it's not just saliva smearing around the clit, labia, etc.

But yeah, Mrs_Fab does get a little ansty if I keep doing that and don't pay close to 100% attention to Miss Klitty later in the going.
 
2012-09-27 05:40:00 PM

skullkrusher: Lionel Mandrake: Where the hell the "conservative movement" be without radio assholes (including female shock jocks)?

better off?


Well, except for people like Breitbart's staff. They'd be out of a job. But everyone else would be better off.
 
2012-09-27 05:40:49 PM

Gyrfalcon: Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.


My OB-GYN once told me that the "fish odor" comes from an allergic reaction to the guy's sperm. A Ph level intolerance, really. It's happened a few times. A week-long regimen of prescription ointment (applied nightly) clears it up.
 
2012-09-27 05:41:22 PM
a) Moderate pressure with flat tongue, starting at the perineum, slow lick up to the clit.

b) Firm pressure with the front of the tongue on the clit hood (avoiding the exposed clit itself), low frequency licking (approx 1 Hz) with full mouth contact

c) Very light pressure with the tip of the tongue, flicking the exposed clit as rapidly as possible with little or no mouth contact.

Mix & match all of the above until desired results are achieved. Simultaneous manual stroking of the mons, inner thighs, butt and everywhere in between helps greatly, too.
 
2012-09-27 05:41:49 PM

Cythraul: Definitely gay.


I was about to go all "so, calling someone gay is still the go-to-insult. Nice, enlightening comment."

Clicked profile.

Carry on.
 
2012-09-27 05:42:38 PM

Gyrfalcon: Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.


True enough, but I still think that bathing habits are more important than diet. pH and whatnot don't seem to matter too much as long as it's kept clean - I mean, I live on the classic bachelorette's diet of junk food and more junk food, but I'm an obsessive bather and I've never had any complaints as a result. Of course, the plural of anecdote isn't data and everybody's different, but eh. :P

/:P :P :P
//[beavis_and_butthead.jpg]
 
2012-09-27 05:42:42 PM

karmaceutical: [i.cdn.turner.com image 200x250]

"Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I'm going to cut your farking throat."


Use this Cutco knife.
 
2012-09-27 05:50:37 PM
NSFW Link to Sarah's Jewliciousness

/I'd gobble her gefilte
//Oy!
 
2012-09-27 05:51:43 PM
I'd get her from behind then tell her I'm a Republican.

Then see if I can hang on for 8 seconds....
 
2012-09-27 05:51:50 PM

threedingers: Mix & match all of the above until desired results are achieved. Simultaneous manual stroking of the mons, inner thighs, butt and everywhere in between helps greatly, too.


While we're talking technique - one finger rubbing each side of the clit plus the tongue doing its usual thing in the middle. Can be overstimulating, but holy farking Christ on a cracker, when my girlfriend at the time came up with that one, I thought I was going to spontaneously combust.

/This is a bizarre thread for the politics tab.
//Not that I'm complaining.
 
2012-09-27 05:54:15 PM

ManateeGag: Add me to the list of Love to do it and not single. Too bad my wife isn't into it.


Ditto. What the hell gives with that?
 
2012-09-27 05:57:01 PM

Skleenar: ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.

How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.


Had a girlfriend once that wasn't into it..giving OR receiving.

/it didn't last..thankfully.
 
2012-09-27 05:57:50 PM
Why is it that men often brag about how good they are at giving oral, but women never do?
 
2012-09-27 05:58:21 PM

ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.


Wuh? Is that a serious statement?

http://youtu.be/Gbb8bigAgLw
 
2012-09-27 05:58:45 PM

Fluorescent Testicle: threedingers: Mix & match all of the above until desired results are achieved. Simultaneous manual stroking of the mons, inner thighs, butt and everywhere in between helps greatly, too.

While we're talking technique - one finger rubbing each side of the clit plus the tongue doing its usual thing in the middle. Can be overstimulating, but holy farking Christ on a cracker, when my girlfriend at the time came up with that one, I thought I was going to spontaneously combust.

/This is a bizarre thread for the politics tab.
//Not that I'm complaining.


Oooh, I'll have to try that. I'll wait 'til Mrs dingers is almost "there" though. Sounds like it might be a bit much right at the outset...
 
2012-09-27 06:00:19 PM
"Don't you guys hate it when your girl has an orgasm?"
 
2012-09-27 06:03:35 PM
Oh man up and just get in there and do it.
 
2012-09-27 06:04:42 PM

Kazan: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^
 
2012-09-27 06:05:21 PM

threedingers: a) Moderate pressure with flat tongue, starting at the perineum, slow lick up to the clit.

b) Firm pressure with the front of the tongue on the clit hood (avoiding the exposed clit itself), low frequency licking (approx 1 Hz) with full mouth contact

c) Very light pressure with the tip of the tongue, flicking the exposed clit as rapidly as possible with little or no mouth contact.

Mix & match all of the above until desired results are achieved. Simultaneous manual stroking of the mons, inner thighs, butt and everywhere in between helps greatly, too.


When does your Cosmo subscription expire?
 
2012-09-27 06:05:23 PM

Now That's What I Call a Taco!: Why is it that men often brag about how good they are at giving oral, but women never do?


Sounds like you've been listening to the wrong people. I've known a number of women who've touted their oral skills.
 
2012-09-27 06:09:22 PM

zappaisfrank: [www.makli.us image 600x300]

Lick..the alphabet..


That's exactly what this song is about :-) 

We're going down, down, down, if that's the only way

2 make this cruel, cruel world hear what we've got to say

Put the right letters together and make a better day
 
2012-09-27 06:09:42 PM

meat0918: meat0918: Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

As long as you pray afterwords, it's all good.

Good, GOOD, not goo!


Ya know, I like the first way you said it better.
 
2012-09-27 06:12:04 PM
I wouldn't say "gross" - messy, maybe.


/If your face doesn't look like a glazed donut when you come up, you're doing it wrong.
 
2012-09-27 06:14:34 PM
Sarah Silverman was nude in a movie, you know....

NSFW:

http://i.imgur.com/sSdi1.jpg

NSFW
 
2012-09-27 06:14:35 PM

Garet Garrett: threedingers: a) Moderate pressure with flat tongue, starting at the perineum, slow lick up to the clit.

b) Firm pressure with the front of the tongue on the clit hood (avoiding the exposed clit itself), low frequency licking (approx 1 Hz) with full mouth contact

c) Very light pressure with the tip of the tongue, flicking the exposed clit as rapidly as possible with little or no mouth contact.

Mix & match all of the above until desired results are achieved. Simultaneous manual stroking of the mons, inner thighs, butt and everywhere in between helps greatly, too.

When does your Cosmo subscription expire?


If that were the case my post would have involved a lot more pepper, pube yanking and Indian burns..
 
2012-09-27 06:15:34 PM

Fluorescent Testicle: Gyrfalcon: Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.

True enough, but I still think that bathing habits are more important than diet. pH and whatnot don't seem to matter too much as long as it's kept clean - I mean, I live on the classic bachelorette's diet of junk food and more junk food, but I'm an obsessive bather and I've never had any complaints as a result. Of course, the plural of anecdote isn't data and everybody's different, but eh. :P

/:P :P :P
//[beavis_and_butthead.jpg]


As I say, we need an adventurous male Farker with a nimble and agile tongue willing to do some field work. This is clearly an issue which requires a dedicated, longitudinal study.
 
2012-09-27 06:23:37 PM

Gyrfalcon: Fluorescent Testicle: Gyrfalcon: Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.

True enough, but I still think that bathing habits are more important than diet. pH and whatnot don't seem to matter too much as long as it's kept clean - I mean, I live on the classic bachelorette's diet of junk food and more junk food, but I'm an obsessive bather and I've never had any complaints as a result. Of course, the plural of anecdote isn't data and everybody's different, but eh. :P

/:P :P :P
//[beavis_and_butthead.jpg]

As I say, we need an adventurous male Farker with a nimble and agile tongue willing to do some field work. This is clearly an issue which requires a dedicated, longitudinal study.


What time do you need me there?
 
2012-09-27 06:31:14 PM
As someone said earlier in the thread, if you don't go down on your girl, and you call yourself a straight male, you are either gay, or suck at sex. Man up and do it, or stop dating wildebeests.
 
2012-09-27 06:31:46 PM
Fine Breitbart, more for me.

/Loooooooove to do it
 
2012-09-27 06:36:30 PM
It's easy to identify the Theocrats, the derp-Murikans, and other morans in this thread.
 
2012-09-27 06:48:29 PM
www.orsm.net
 
2012-09-27 06:49:13 PM
www.sanjeev.net
 
2012-09-27 06:50:05 PM

meat0918: meat0918: Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.

As long as you pray afterwords, it's all good.

Good, GOOD, not goo!


Yes. If done correctly, the goo comes BEFORE the praying for forgiveness.
 
2012-09-27 06:50:56 PM

Corvus: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 392x500]


kinda looks like a dude in women's underwear
 
2012-09-27 06:51:28 PM
Really?
Really?
WTF has happened to Fark??
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-09-27 06:52:00 PM

Fluorescent Testicle: Gyrfalcon: Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.

True enough, but I still think that bathing habits are more important than diet. pH and whatnot don't seem to matter too much as long as it's kept clean - I mean, I live on the classic bachelorette's diet of junk food and more junk food, but I'm an obsessive bather and I've never had any complaints as a result. Of course, the plural of anecdote isn't data and everybody's different, but eh. :P

/:P :P :P
//[beavis_and_butthead.jpg]


Ah-heh, that's definitely it. Dated a girl who clearly was not as hygienic as she should have been, and YEESH, it was a CHORE. Had to hold my breath for the duration.

/still did it because reciprocation is part of a relationship
//have moved on and up QUITE nicely since then
///or I guess moved on and DOWN?
////HIYOOOOOOOOOO!
 
2012-09-27 06:52:33 PM

zappaisfrank: Skleenar: ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.

How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.

Had a girlfriend once that wasn't into it..giving OR receiving.

/it didn't last..thankfully.



I'm really not into it at all; it's just not enough stimulation, and i feel uncomfortable laying there doing nothing. My mind starts to wander, and then the whole house of cards comes down soon thereafter.


/more than happy to give, but receiving - meh
 
2012-09-27 06:53:26 PM
topidol.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-27 06:55:35 PM

Headso: Are super religious freaks allowed to perform oral without going to hell? I am not clear on the rules... I know super freaks have no problem with it.


anything that is not penis in vag is considered sodomy.
 
2012-09-27 06:59:25 PM

ferretman: [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x183]

Who here has 'earned' them?


redwings. meh...

Who here is willing to eat a freshly made cream pie?

www.preparedpantry.com

No, not this kind...
 
2012-09-27 07:07:55 PM
images.politico.com 

looking this clean cut? trust me, he got freaky with it.
 
2012-09-27 07:13:52 PM
I put my head down there, and even if she still has clothing on it drives her wild. She takes off her top and moans very loudly as my head slightly moves in an almost imperceptible way.
Her moans are so strong that remain focused on staring at her lower stomach. There's a good 10 inches or so between me and the targeted area, but she doesn't know that. Sometimes I'll use my hands and make some motions in the air between her legs if I'm feeling really frisky.

The camera then pans to my ass for a good 5 seconds and teenagers nationwide recoil in horror, but they will learn in time that Skinemax has a toll for its ferry to manhood.
 
2012-09-27 07:14:46 PM
Damn editing. I mean "her moans are so strong, but I remain focused..."
 
2012-09-27 07:16:38 PM

Headso: Mugato: The comments section is predictably hateful.

I know foxnews had to get rid of their comments section, if you ever read them it was constant racism and bigotry and general hatefulness. These right wing derper sites should consider doing the same thing.


Is that what happened to them?
I liked to read them, then one day
the buttons were gone. I figured
I just wasn't looking in the right place
on the pages.

It's not the only wide-audience site
which has done away with the
comments section. They should
bring them back, no matter how crazy
the comments get. Half the time,
the comments are what make the
actual article worth reading the first time.
 
2012-09-27 07:17:39 PM

meat0918: Headso: Mugato: The comments section is predictably hateful.

I know foxnews had to get rid of their comments section, if you ever read them it was constant racism and bigotry and general hatefulness. These right wing derper sites should consider doing the same thing.

Require a facebook login. Seems to work on calming the vitriol, since most of these types can't figure out to make an account with a fake name to use for commenting.


Ah, nevermind then.

/facebook logins are like requests to subscribe
 
2012-09-27 07:19:51 PM

nekulor: As someone said earlier in the thread, if you don't go down on your girl, and you call yourself a straight male, you are either gay, or suck at sex. Man up and do it, or stop dating wildebeests.


What if she doesn't want it, or isn't interested in it?
I think this is one of those things where people
think they're supposed to do it, and you're supposed
to enjoy it... but the reality is
you don't have to, and it's ok.
 
2012-09-27 07:21:14 PM
cbskluv.files.wordpress.com

Voating for Romney
 
2012-09-27 07:21:22 PM
I'm a guy and I find the idea of going down on a lady quite unpleasant.

But I love sucking dick (and eating a freshly showered manhole)

/Because teh ghey, I haz it
 
2012-09-27 07:21:46 PM

spman: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Hot and funny AS ALWAYS. She's not on my TV enough.

[cdn.breitbart.com image 450x337]

Hot? You sure you don't need a stronger prescription on your glasses?


Ask me how I know you are gay....
 
2012-09-27 07:28:33 PM
Didn't read the article, haven't read any of the comments, just came here immediately to tell the following joke:

A woman gets married for the third time. As her husband carries her over the threshold she says "Be gentle with me. I'm a virgin."

"How can that be?" says her new husband. "This is your third marriage."

"Well, my first husband was a gynecologist. He just wanted to look at it.

"My second husband was a psychiatrist. He just wanted to talk about it.

"My third husband was a stamp collector... God, I miss him!"
 
2012-09-27 07:29:09 PM

zappaisfrank: Skleenar: ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.

How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.

Had a girlfriend once that wasn't into it..giving OR receiving.

/it didn't last..thankfully.


The only ones with similar stigma that I have encountered were semi-practicing religious cultists. Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses to be specific.

No loss. Ditch the crazies.
 
2012-09-27 07:35:18 PM

ExperianScaresCthulhu: nekulor: As someone said earlier in the thread, if you don't go down on your girl, and you call yourself a straight male, you are either gay, or suck at sex. Man up and do it, or stop dating wildebeests.

What if she doesn't want it, or isn't interested in it?



Take these words as the weird musings of an experienced old man, if you wish. 1) She's interested. 2) The smell alone drives most men to strive and achieve their absolute peak performance. Isn't that all for the best?
 
2012-09-27 07:36:21 PM

BorgiaGinz: I'm a guy and I find the idea of going down on a lady quite unpleasant.

But I love sucking dick (and eating a freshly showered manhole)

/Because teh ghey, I haz it


cdn.styleforum.net
 
2012-09-27 07:48:02 PM

Brick-House: Voating


keep trying, your pathetic efforts are cracking me up.
 
2012-09-27 07:52:38 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


Maybe if you're a man who claims to be straight, otherwise not so much.
 
2012-09-27 07:55:26 PM

Patterson: "Don't you guys hate it when your girl has an orgasm?"


Total MYTH!!!
 
2012-09-27 07:57:02 PM
roguejew.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-27 07:59:14 PM
but I love doing that!

not single either
but i'm willing to learn
 
2012-09-27 08:04:21 PM
Like an aardvark at a chocolate factory.
 
2012-09-27 08:06:45 PM
I find this potty mouthed brunette extremely attractive as well

call me, sarah!
 
2012-09-27 08:09:08 PM

vudukungfu: So then, it's like swimming?


/obscure?


All the way downtown?
 
2012-09-27 08:39:02 PM
 
2012-09-27 08:43:30 PM

Turbo Cojones: zappaisfrank: Skleenar: ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.

How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.

Had a girlfriend once that wasn't into it..giving OR receiving.

/it didn't last..thankfully.

The only ones with similar stigma that I have encountered were semi-practicing religious cultists. Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses to be specific.

No loss. Ditch the crazies.


I had a girlfriend once who was too sensitive for it.
 
2012-09-27 08:44:25 PM

bugontherug: Turbo Cojones: zappaisfrank: Skleenar: ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.

How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.

Had a girlfriend once that wasn't into it..giving OR receiving.

/it didn't last..thankfully.

The only ones with similar stigma that I have encountered were semi-practicing religious cultists. Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses to be specific.

No loss. Ditch the crazies.

I had a girlfriend once who was too sensitive for it.


I should add, I'm inclined to believe her, because when I was younger I was too sensitive for some things too.
 
2012-09-27 08:57:42 PM

bugontherug: bugontherug: Turbo Cojones: zappaisfrank: Skleenar: ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.

How can this be? I've done a ton of research on this, and EVERY woman in EVERY research film I have seen on the subject LOVES it.

Had a girlfriend once that wasn't into it..giving OR receiving.

/it didn't last..thankfully.

The only ones with similar stigma that I have encountered were semi-practicing religious cultists. Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses to be specific.

No loss. Ditch the crazies.

I had a girlfriend once who was too sensitive for it.

I should add, I'm inclined to believe her, because when I was younger I was too sensitive for some things too.


just breath out on the in strokes and you'll be fine

that's what they told us in prison anyway

but not really
 
2012-09-27 09:09:24 PM
Haters gonna hate, but I would fark Sarah Silverman until she was blew in the face.
 
2012-09-27 09:15:21 PM
Jeeze, even their hang ups are hung up
 
2012-09-27 09:17:48 PM

Kazan: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


What do you mean by closet case?

/actually never tried
//may love it
 
2012-09-27 09:33:21 PM

Brick-House: [roguejew.files.wordpress.com image 454x464]


Cordially, I say unto thee, go fornicate thyself, you conservatroll threadshiatter.


Now, back to the important discussion: shaved or not?
 
2012-09-27 09:33:22 PM

Highroller48: Haters gonna hate, but I would fark Sarah Silverman until she was blew in the face.


You just blue yourself.
 
2012-09-27 09:41:12 PM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.


I'm neither of those things and the thought of eating snatch makes me a little queasy.

Then again I'm a het woman
 
2012-09-27 09:51:16 PM

Chameleon: Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

I'm neither of those things and the thought of eating snatch makes me a little queasy.

Then again I'm a het woman


Speaking as a heterosexual male. It's kind of hard wired into us. We have no choice. No select one from column A, select one from column B.

Absolutely everything about oral sex is delightful. The motions, the sounds, the fragrance, the urgency.
 
2012-09-27 10:03:57 PM

culebra: Highroller48: Haters gonna hate, but I would fark Sarah Silverman until she was blew in the face.

You just blue yourself.


Subtlety's not your strong suit, I see.
 
2012-09-27 10:08:43 PM
Smells like fish, taste like chicken, so plug your nose and keep on licking.
 
2012-09-27 10:25:49 PM
Amurica...Fark Ya!

How hot is your body, butthead?

Nobody's perfect. Most women have cellulite, and if you're married to someone who doesn't have it, you're in the minority.
 
2012-09-27 10:36:07 PM

Gyrfalcon: Fluorescent Testicle: DeltaPunch: Maybe it's their diet? I dated a (white) girl in college that subsisted on french fries, meat, chicken fingers, fried foods -- basically pure junk food -- and I nearly gagged when I went down on her. I've since dated two vegetarians, both of whom exercise, drink lots of water, eat healthy, etc., and they both smelled super clean all the time, like zero odor at all.

I've personally never noticed a difference from their diet alone, but a lazy diet can indicate lazy bathing habits. Sounds like Lil' Miss Junk Food just didn't like washing herself where it mattered.

Being a woman, I can tell you that what you eat does affect your Ph levels, which can affect your womanly discharges and your menstrual flow (have I grossed you out enough yet?). Heavier levels of both can, well, ferment, and lead to nasty odors and/or tastes. Now I don't know for sure if lots of greasy food = smelly crotch, but an adventuresome Farker might get some good grant money to find out.


Smoking, coffee, and alcohol seem to have an effect if you do it daily. I dated an chronic alcoholic and I went down on her once.

Once.

img827.imageshack.us

I think she actually burnt my tongue.
 
2012-09-27 10:40:50 PM

ferretman: [www.ukrecordshop.com image 450x404]

Isn't this racist? Black men don't eat pussy.


Also doesn't eat pussy:

"Cunnilingus and Psychaiatriy brought us to this"
 
2012-09-27 11:10:50 PM
Love giving oral. I always try to start with oral, I've pulled out to give oral, hell I've spent 30 minutes straight face down in between a womans legs. Watching(and feeling) a woman orgasm while you're at Ground Zero is spec-farking-tacular. Anyone who thinks it's messy or evil has most likely never had/given any.
 
2012-09-27 11:51:20 PM
My ex was fecking obsessed.. loved if. My current kind of likes it but isn't all that keen (likes fingers better), would much much much rather give than receive. Takes all sorts.
 
2012-09-27 11:55:33 PM
I like doing it and my wife loves getting it, but unless she keeps the grass mowed it ain't gonna happen.
 
2012-09-28 12:27:38 AM
Gah, this thread is making me wish I wasn't so single. I'm fantastic at this craft but have been out of practice for a while. Curse you farkers!
 
2012-09-28 12:39:32 AM

Young Rory Calhoun: Gah, this thread is making me wish I wasn't so single. I'm fantastic at this craft but have been out of practice for a while. Curse you farkers!


here you go

this will make you feel better NSFW?

I never know 'cause I"m always at work.
 
2012-09-28 01:23:16 AM

nekulor: Brick-House: [roguejew.files.wordpress.com image 454x464]

Cordially, I say unto thee, go fornicate thyself, you conservatroll threadshiatter.


Now, back to the important discussion: shaved or not?


Not. I hate licking stubble so give me a nice bush any day.

As for Obama -- what was the subject pf this thread again, something about the GOP as i remember? And it is under the politics tab... So obama is accaptable because generally speaking, black men don't eat the puss. All the more reason to vote Romney. C'mon, look at Anne Romney and tell me mitt never got a taste. You know he did.
 
2012-09-28 01:33:37 AM

Flappyhead: Love giving oral. I always try to start with oral, I've pulled out to give oral, hell I've spent 30 minutes straight face down in between a womans legs. Watching(and feeling) a woman orgasm while you're at Ground Zero is spec-farking-tacular. Anyone who thinks it's messy or evil has most likely never had/given any.


Will you eat a cream pie you helped create? Because that's when it gets real sloppy.

And to address the question of Red Wings brought up earlier in the thread. Nope, but I have wondered about this...

thecampusdiva.com
 
2012-09-28 01:49:33 AM

Brick-House: nekulor: Brick-House: [roguejew.files.wordpress.com image 454x464]

Cordially, I say unto thee, go fornicate thyself, you conservatroll threadshiatter.


Now, back to the important discussion: shaved or not?

Not. I hate licking stubble so give me a nice bush any day.

As for Obama -- what was the subject pf this thread again, something about the GOP as i remember? And it is under the politics tab... So obama is accaptable because generally speaking, black men don't eat the puss. All the more reason to vote Romney. C'mon, look at Anne Romney and tell me mitt never got a taste. You know he did.


This is a woman who gets her pussy eaten...

images.sodahead.com
 
2012-09-28 02:03:44 AM

Rwa2play: /nothing better than going down on a woman


THIS. It is my absolute favorite thing in this world. There is nothing better. Nothing. Seriously.
 
2012-09-28 02:12:47 AM

Brick-House: Will you eat a cream pie you helped create? Because that's when it gets real sloppy.


It completely depends on what she wants. I've had women wave off the felching because they like holding in the creampie. Others go for the felching but want me to snowball with them afterward. And then, yes, some of them want me to felch and swallow it while they watch. Who am I to argue? The mess doesn't bother me. We made it. We can play in it. Sloppy oral can be seriously fun.
 
2012-09-28 02:19:56 AM

Brick-House: Not. I hate licking stubble so give me a nice bush any day.


I agree about not liking to lick the stubble. Shaved is okay with me as long as the skin is smooth. Depilated is better. Otherwise, I have no problem with a nice bush. Hell, I trained on bush (yes, because I'm so old).
 
2012-09-28 02:36:19 AM

ManateeGag: Too bad my wife isn't into it.


You need to work on that. Kiss her from head to toe and savor every inch of her that she'll let you kiss. Talk to her about your wanting to go down on her. Ask her why she's not into it and actually listen to what she tells you. A little communication and thoughtful discussion might just open some doors for you. I am almost older than dirt, and in my entire life I've never found a woman who truly didn't like it. I definitely wouldn't give up on the wife.
 
2012-09-28 02:45:37 AM
i1148.photobucket.com

Colonel Angus approves
 
2012-09-28 03:25:12 AM

zappaisfrank: Lick..the alphabet..


That's terrible advice, by the way.
 
2012-09-28 03:52:22 AM
Going down on me, giving me an explosive O and getting the thighs, sheets and your face all wet will pretty much guarantee we can spend a few more hours in pretty much whatever position we can dream up.

Want to try pounding me so hard from behind that my tonsils pop out? I'm niiice and marinated. Such acrobatics might have been uncomfortable before you did that. Even may still be, but oh the sweet edgy bite of near-pain.

I may be sore tomorrow, but not injured. You took the edge off so I could enjoy more leisurely multiple rolling orgasms, and your balls are so drained that you're shooting dry.

I had NO idea about that one until I noticed he was walking funny, too. And a actually defending himself and saying "Don't TOUCH ME!"

Final somewhat related Protip: when you see your beloved walking around with her glorious menstral-tits she won't even let a bra touch cause they hurt? Give her a Motrin, coax her out of her top and pet them, and slip your hand UNDER her panties and rub her off. She'll curl up like a cat and go right to sleep. And probably swallow your milk tomorrow.

I hope some of you guys really, truly enjoy making us climax cause it's fun for you. Cause we enjoy sometimes doing it to you just cause we know it makes you feel good.
 
2012-09-28 07:38:00 AM

Omahawg: Young Rory Calhoun: Gah, this thread is making me wish I wasn't so single. I'm fantastic at this craft but have been out of practice for a while. Curse you farkers!

here you go

this will make you feel better NSFW?

I never know 'cause I"m always at work.


I can't load that first video on my iPad but that song is amazing
 
2012-09-28 07:40:26 AM

ThatsJustWrong!: Going down on me, giving me an explosive O and getting the thighs, sheets and your face all wet will pretty much guarantee we can spend a few more hours in pretty much whatever position we can dream up.

Want to try pounding me so hard from behind that my tonsils pop out? I'm niiice and marinated. Such acrobatics might have been uncomfortable before you did that. Even may still be, but oh the sweet edgy bite of near-pain.

I may be sore tomorrow, but not injured. You took the edge off so I could enjoy more leisurely multiple rolling orgasms, and your balls are so drained that you're shooting dry.

I had NO idea about that one until I noticed he was walking funny, too. And a actually defending himself and saying "Don't TOUCH ME!"

Final somewhat related Protip: when you see your beloved walking around with her glorious menstral-tits she won't even let a bra touch cause they hurt? Give her a Motrin, coax her out of her top and pet them, and slip your hand UNDER her panties and rub her off. She'll curl up like a cat and go right to sleep. And probably swallow your milk tomorrow.

I hope some of you guys really, truly enjoy making us climax cause it's fun for you. Cause we enjoy sometimes doing it to you just cause we know it makes you feel good.


I always thought I was in the minority on this based on some of the bro talk I've had with friends, but I get a majority of my pleasure from making a woman squirm and scream in delight. But based on this thread I'm with the majority of farkers
 
2012-09-28 08:20:34 AM
I knew there was a reason Andrew died early. Just didn't figure it was sexual frustration. Seems like he's infected the lot of them with his adolescent ethos.
 
2012-09-28 09:03:08 AM
Personally I love giving that to a woman. I stay with it until she tells me to stop. It makes up for a lot of my, um, shortcomings.
 
2012-09-28 09:20:26 AM

Sgt Otter: If you don't eat pussy, you're either a closet case or a selfish asshole.

 
2012-09-28 10:09:47 AM
No wonder there are conservative women who want to legislatively punish their liberal counterparts. They're envious of the fact that liberal women enjoy the best thing a woman can enjoy from a loving partner. I'm sure that loathing is everything a conservative wife thinks about as she angrily rams her strap on into her husband's anus every other night.
 
2012-09-28 11:32:22 AM
I have but one bit of advice for giving oral...

...farking SHAVE YOUR BEARD!
 
2012-09-28 11:51:46 AM

MeanJean: I have but one bit of advice for giving oral...

...farking SHAVE YOUR BEARD!


Yes Mom...
 
2012-09-28 11:56:33 AM

MeanJean: I have but one bit of advice for giving oral...

...farking SHAVE YOUR BEARD!


But how will I save the flavor so I can scratch and sniff later at work?
 
2012-09-28 12:17:50 PM

MeanJean: I have but one bit of advice for giving oral...

...farking SHAVE YOUR BEARD!


Screw that. I condition and groom my beard, so it may be a bit tickly, but it's not scrapey or stabby. Trust me, you don't want to see me without mah face fuzz.
 
2012-09-28 12:45:57 PM
To the few ladies out there that need to be told this, please, please, PLEASE wash your puss. The old saying once you get past the smell, etc... ain't so true. I will eat you before, during and after fooking you. I will lick you clean, I will eat your ass. BUT, I really really hate heading south to give your puss the attention it deserves only to turn back because of the stench.

Most of you ladies do not have this issue, but sadly, there are a few out there that just don't know that soap and warm water is your friend.

And guys, try slipping an ice chip into your lady and slurping up the melt water. Trust me, you will be peeling them off the ceiling or they will crush your head with their thighs. Either way, good times. ;-P
 
2012-09-28 01:08:06 PM

Brick-House: Most of you ladies do not have this issue, but sadly, there are a few out there that just don't know that soap and warm water is your friend.


Actually, if her vagina is stanky, it's probably because she was using soap where she shouldn't have. Soap and vaginas are not friends. Here, I'll let a hot girl explain:

Laci Green and the art of Vaginal Maintenance
 
2012-09-28 01:18:48 PM
Also, why are so many men so bad at giving head? I've had maybe two guys give me good head in my life. Why is this so difficult?
 
2012-09-28 01:21:54 PM

MeanJean: Also, why are so many men so bad at giving head? I've had maybe two guys give me good head in my life. Why is this so difficult?


Unfamiliar equipment.
 
2012-09-28 01:30:14 PM

MeanJean: Also, why are so many men so bad at giving head? I've had maybe two guys give me good head in my life. Why is this so difficult?


Have you talked to them before hand? Told them things you like and don't like? Do you give them feedback during?

Note, I am NOT suggesting it's somehow your fault, but a lot of guys don't understand the concept that oral is not something you do TO a woman, it's something you do WITH a woman. You listen to what she says, the noises she makes, you pay attention to how she moves her body, and so on. If a guy just dives down there and starts lapping away like a dog at his water bowl and doesn't pay attention, no one is going to have much fun.
 
2012-09-28 01:36:03 PM
Teufelaffe

Have you talked to them before hand? Told them things you like and don't like? Do you give them feedback during?

Note, I am NOT suggesting it's somehow your fault, but a lot of guys don't understand the concept that oral is not something you do TO a woman, it's something you do WITH a woman. You listen to what she says, the noises she makes, you pay attention to how she moves her body, and so on. If a guy just dives down there and starts lapping away like a dog at his water bowl and doesn't pay attention, no one is going to have much fun.


This is what happens:

"No...ow! shiat, don't use your teeth...you're pressing your chin into me...agh your beard is scraping...move up a little...no that's too high up...screw it, lets just fark."
 
2012-09-28 01:48:32 PM

MeanJean: Teufelaffe

Have you talked to them before hand? Told them things you like and don't like? Do you give them feedback during?

Note, I am NOT suggesting it's somehow your fault, but a lot of guys don't understand the concept that oral is not something you do TO a woman, it's something you do WITH a woman. You listen to what she says, the noises she makes, you pay attention to how she moves her body, and so on. If a guy just dives down there and starts lapping away like a dog at his water bowl and doesn't pay attention, no one is going to have much fun.

This is what happens:

"No...ow! shiat, don't use your teeth...you're pressing your chin into me...agh your beard is scraping...move up a little...no that's too high up...screw it, lets just fark."


Ah, so you have just been getting guys who suck at it. Hopefully the farking was better.
 
2012-09-28 02:49:59 PM
Teufelaffe

Yes, much better. ^_^
 
2012-09-29 12:17:44 AM
Imagine my complete lack of surprise.
 
2012-09-29 08:01:22 PM
/gaycalleditsforyou.gif
 
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