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(CBC)   Who could have guessed that showing up at a money transfer store with a duffel bag filled with $500k in cash might attract police attention   (cbc.ca ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, money launders, duffel bags, Toronto Police  
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6655 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Sep 2012 at 12:09 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



43 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2012-09-24 09:06:31 PM  
I would have called first to ask what the maximum transaction was, but that's just me.
 
2012-09-24 09:16:46 PM  
Could have helped
 
2012-09-24 09:17:40 PM  
www.moviefancentral.com

Could have helped

/be sure to click "Preview" when you want to add a pic, not "Add Comment"
 
2012-09-24 09:32:18 PM  
Well, it's definitely transferred now

/all $250,000.00 worth
 
2012-09-24 09:35:52 PM  

jake_lex: Could have helped


Laser tag?
 
2012-09-24 09:59:16 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Well, it's definitely transferred now

/all $250,000.00 worth


Does Canada have the same draconian drug seizure laws the US does? Because in the US they'd seize all the money and if they couldn't prove they got it via legit means, it's gone.
 
2012-09-24 10:08:02 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Well, it's definitely transferred now

/all $250,000.00 worth


i.qkme.me
 
2012-09-24 10:27:33 PM  
Why can't I ever find a duffel bag full of 500K dollars.
 
2012-09-24 10:35:55 PM  

basemetal: Why can't I ever find a duffel bag full of 500K dollars.


Maybe you're looking into the wrong holes in your patients.
 
2012-09-24 10:36:40 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Well, it's definitely transferred now

/all $250,000.00 worth


But what would the cops do with $200,000?

basemetal: Why can't I ever find a duffel bag full of 500K dollars.


All I ever find are duffel bags with EIGHT HEADS.
 
2012-09-24 10:42:37 PM  

dahmers love zombie: All I ever find are duffel bags with EIGHT HEADS.


I love that movie.
 
2012-09-24 11:00:16 PM  

jaylectricity: dahmers love zombie: All I ever find are duffel bags with EIGHT HEADS.

I love that movie.


Well the good news is his head isn't in the storage room. I once found a head in the storage room. It's a funny story actually. I put it in my locker because I didn't have time to get down to the lost and found. Went on a long weekend, forgot all about it. Come back to work on Monday, open my locker, woahhhh, head! Plus rats. I panicked, I didn't know what the hell to do so I grabbed the thing and ran up to the roof and I punt it. I shank it wide left like I always do. Now it's heading straight down right for Kelso sitting in his convertible. I'm done. I'm out of a job, right? Wrong. At that second a hawk flies in, grabs the thing and flies off with it. I know what you're thinking. We're in the middle of a city, what's a hawk doing there?
 
2012-09-24 11:06:10 PM  

basemetal: Why can't I ever find a duffel bag full of 500K dollars.


Because often when you find a bag with that kind of money in it, you get a guy like this looking for you:

images3.wikia.nocookie.net 

/friend-o
 
2012-09-25 12:18:51 AM  
Good grief, just pay Vito's 20% service fee and be done with it. 400K$ + freedom > 0K$ + jail.
 
2012-09-25 12:20:11 AM  
But it's $500k Canadian. How much is that in Renminbi?
 
2012-09-25 12:20:45 AM  
Wow.

We have some really stupid gangsters.
 
2012-09-25 12:28:59 AM  
Because how would anyone ever make 500K legally? That's just crazy talk. But remember, "crime doesn't pay".
 
2012-09-25 12:33:26 AM  
Hail, hail, Norquist and Rove
Call The Reagan we will go
Sign the pledge, no taxes will be
Friendly Reagan come to me

i48.tinypic.com
 
2012-09-25 12:34:25 AM  
Well, I screwed THAT up
 
2012-09-25 12:36:28 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Well, I screwed THAT up


Nice shoop though.
 
2012-09-25 12:43:30 AM  
People always wonder what they would do if they found say... 500k in a bag.

Leave it right there and don't touch it. If you take it one of two groups of people will find you and both of these groups carry guns... And only one has badges.
 
2012-09-25 12:46:39 AM  
What happens to the duffel bag?
 
2012-09-25 12:52:32 AM  
Some guys in Miami were eating at Miami subs and found a duffel bag with $100,000. Problem was, it was a ransom drop being tracked by the FBI.
These guys drove a couple miles, pulled into a gas station, and gave the duffel bag to a cop.
Now the FBI is all like WTF are the cops in on it?

Long story short turns out the dudes were just dudes and got scared and gave it to a cop.
/CSB
 
2012-09-25 12:53:34 AM  
I suppose if I were to be in shady type business dealings. I don't know how Canada deals with this, but just show up to the police office with the bag full of money and say "Hey dudes I found this bag and would like to turn it in!" After some time passes they call you and say since you found it you can have it. Then your drug money or whatever is now under the guise of legit money now and proceed with the transaction.
 
2012-09-25 12:57:30 AM  

moefuggenbrew: Some guys in Miami were eating at Miami subs and found a duffel bag with $100,000. Problem was, it was a ransom drop being tracked by the FBI.
These guys drove a couple miles, pulled into a gas station, and gave the duffel bag to a cop.
Now the FBI is all like WTF are the cops in on it?

Long story short turns out the dudes were just dudes and got scared and gave it to a cop.
/CSB


Damn, that was a day the cop wished he stayed home I bet.
 
2012-09-25 12:57:47 AM  
www.wearysloth.com
 
2012-09-25 12:57:58 AM  

Godhand: I suppose if I were to be in shady type business dealings. I don't know how Canada deals with this, but just show up to the police office with the bag full of money and say "Hey dudes I found this bag and would like to turn it in!" After some time passes they call you and say since you found it you can have it. Then your drug money or whatever is now under the guise of legit money now and proceed with the transaction.


It wouldn't work. There was a news story about the police attempting to keep the money for 'evidence' even though nobody claimed it, considering 'traces of drugs' was found on the money. If it wasn't for the media attention, the police department could've succeeded in that BS.
 
HBK
2012-09-25 12:58:49 AM  

Godhand: I suppose if I were to be in shady type business dealings. I don't know how Canada deals with this, but just show up to the police office with the bag full of money and say "Hey dudes I found this bag and would like to turn it in!" After some time passes they call you and say since you found it you can have it. Then your drug money or whatever is now under the guise of legit money now and proceed with the transaction.


That money would be gone and divied up among the cops before you left the station. Thanks for being such an upstanding citizen, hahaha.
 
2012-09-25 12:59:47 AM  

fusillade762: I would have called first to ask what the maximum transaction was, but that's just me.


Western Union (Link) for example has a $2,500 limit on transfers. So yes $500,000 is generally "weird" for the industry.
 
2012-09-25 01:00:30 AM  
It sounds like the cash store kept the money and didn't transfer it, then one of the guys showed up at one of the clerk's houses later.

If someone shows up with that amount of cash, yeah, it's suspicious. But don't, I repeat don't, try to rip that guy off.
 
2012-09-25 01:03:07 AM  

ModernLuddite: It sounds like the cash store kept the money and didn't transfer it, then one of the guys showed up at one of the clerk's houses later.

If someone shows up with that amount of cash, yeah, it's suspicious. But don't, I repeat don't, try to rip that guy off.


Yeah, anybody with that kind of cash isn't doing anything you want to get messed up in.
 
2012-09-25 01:24:36 AM  

Godhand: I suppose if I were to be in shady type business dealings. I don't know how Canada deals with this, but just show up to the police office with the bag full of money and say "Hey dudes I found this bag and would like to turn it in!" After some time passes they call you and say since you found it you can have it. Then your drug money or whatever is now under the guise of legit money now and proceed with the transaction.


HAH. A keyboard: you owe me a new one :D
 
2012-09-25 01:29:04 AM  

jake_lex: [www.moviefancentral.com image 269x326]

Could have helped

/be sure to click "Preview" when you want to add a pic, not "Add Comment"


Dammit!

Yep... better call Saul.
 
2012-09-25 01:32:44 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Well, I screwed THAT up


Eh, maybe this $500k is going to the contras as well.

Really not as off-topic as it could have been.
 
2012-09-25 01:36:26 AM  
Something seems incredible about a man who is able to obtain $500,000 but is too stupid to navigate the policies of Western Union. Yes, there are ways that even the ignorant can make large sums illegally, but it seems that long before he had accumulated half a million someone smarter than this dumbass would have found out about his big, illegal stash of cash and snatched it right out from under him.
 
2012-09-25 02:24:51 AM  

ShannonKW: Something seems incredible about a man who is able to obtain $500,000 but is too stupid to navigate the policies of Western Union. Yes, there are ways that even the ignorant can make large sums illegally, but it seems that long before he had accumulated half a million someone smarter than this dumbass would have found out about his big, illegal stash of cash and snatched it right out from under him.


Hey, imagine how much money we COULD have if we used it to buy instant lotto tickets!!
 
2012-09-25 02:52:03 AM  

ShannonKW: Something seems incredible about a man who is able to obtain $500,000 but is too stupid to navigate the policies of Western Union. Yes, there are ways that even the ignorant can make large sums illegally, but it seems that long before he had accumulated half a million someone smarter than this dumbass would have found out about his big, illegal stash of cash and snatched it right out from under him.


Like I said above. He doesn't have to be smarter than anyone, just have more guns.
 
2012-09-25 03:25:30 AM  
37 comments and no "was that wrong?"
 
2012-09-25 04:51:50 AM  

Gyrfalcon: ShannonKW: Something seems incredible about a man who is able to obtain $500,000 but is too stupid to navigate the policies of Western Union. Yes, there are ways that even the ignorant can make large sums illegally, but it seems that long before he had accumulated half a million someone smarter than this dumbass would have found out about his big, illegal stash of cash and snatched it right out from under him.

Like I said above. He doesn't have to be smarter than anyone, just have more guns drugs to sell.


More likely scenario. It takes a lot longer to get $500k through robbery than it does through dealing drugs.
 
2012-09-25 05:29:22 AM  

basemetal: Why can't I ever find a duffel bag full of 500K dollars.


You don't want to find one. If you do, usually people who have no qualms about doing horrible things to you appear.

/or your family for that matter.
 
2012-09-25 12:18:59 PM  

Lsherm: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Well, it's definitely transferred now

/all $250,000.00 worth

Does Canada have the same draconian drug seizure laws the US does? Because in the US they'd seize all the money and if they couldn't prove they got it via legit means, it's gone.


IIRC the legal fiction here is the state is only alienating the property's (your money) rights, not an actual persons rights by f*cking with their stuff.
so while they would need a certain significant amount of due process to throw you in jail for 6 months, if they just want to steal everything you own from you they can make the courts have allowed a burden of proof that is much less substantial, and even in some ways gets put on the victi...I mean suspect.

how you get that this state of affairs from: nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.
I dunno.
the single most perturbing thing I remember from crim pro I think.
 
2012-09-26 01:16:54 AM  

untaken_name: Gyrfalcon: ShannonKW: Something seems incredible about a man who is able to obtain $500,000 but is too stupid to navigate the policies of Western Union. Yes, there are ways that even the ignorant can make large sums illegally, but it seems that long before he had accumulated half a million someone smarter than this dumbass would have found out about his big, illegal stash of cash and snatched it right out from under him.

Like I said above. He doesn't have to be smarter than anyone, just have more guns drugs to sell.

More likely scenario. It takes a lot longer to get $500k through robbery than it does through dealing drugs.


What about hooking?
 
2012-09-26 01:25:57 AM  

WeenerGord: untaken_name: Gyrfalcon: ShannonKW: Something seems incredible about a man who is able to obtain $500,000 but is too stupid to navigate the policies of Western Union. Yes, there are ways that even the ignorant can make large sums illegally, but it seems that long before he had accumulated half a million someone smarter than this dumbass would have found out about his big, illegal stash of cash and snatched it right out from under him.

Like I said above. He doesn't have to be smarter than anyone, just have more guns drugs to sell.

More likely scenario. It takes a lot longer to get $500k through robbery than it does through dealing drugs.

What about hooking?


Well, not that I'd know, or anything, but that's a whole lot of $40 bjs.
 
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