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(CNN)   Having solved all other problems ever, US Border Patrol arrests Fiona Apple for being in possession of 0.010 lbs of marijuana, forcing her to post $10,000 bail. We can all sleep safer tonight   (cnn.com) divider line 78
    More: Asinine, Fiona Apple, Texas, U.S. Border Patrol  
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1874 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 21 Sep 2012 at 3:29 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-21 12:13:43 AM  
In before "cop math", "legalize it!!1!1!!1", etc....
 
2012-09-21 12:22:07 AM  
JUSTICE IS SERVED!

/what a frikkin joke
 
2012-09-21 12:22:19 AM  
land pirates!
 
2012-09-21 12:23:52 AM  

DanZero: In before "cop math", "legalize it!!1!1!!1", etc....


Well I guess we all need at least one achievement in life to be proud of.

Congratulations. So what now? Disneyland?
 
2012-09-21 12:25:19 AM  
I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.
 
2012-09-21 12:29:42 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: what a frikkin joke


DanZero: legalize it!

 
2012-09-21 12:37:53 AM  

TommyymmoT: DanZero: In before "cop math", "legalize it!!1!1!!1", etc....

Well I guess we all need at least one achievement in life to be proud of.

Congratulations. So what now? Disneyland?


Damn right! I know exactly how every marijuana thread on Fark goes down! I have the secret to riches and eternal life!

See ya later!
 
2012-09-21 12:40:14 AM  
If my math is right, that's what, about 1/6 of an oz? Less than a quarter of marijuana?

Your tax dollars at work, people. Demand better.
 
2012-09-21 12:44:44 AM  
What she needs is a good defense cause she's feeling like a criminal
 
2012-09-21 12:55:11 AM  

dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.


Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.
 
2012-09-21 12:58:07 AM  
Meh, you know it's illegal in Texas, or pretty much the whole bible belt, so if you still want to do it there, you signed up for it, take the consequences.
 
2012-09-21 01:03:09 AM  
She's been a bad bad girl...

i.ytimg.com
 
2012-09-21 01:16:00 AM  
She must have the crappiest crew on the planet. I don't know too many touring pros that wouldn't have taken the fall for her, just to insure that the show goes off.
Especially considering the piddly amount, and the likely cash bonus that would soon follow.
 
2012-09-21 01:28:48 AM  
Whatever keeps her from making music.
 
2012-09-21 02:06:52 AM  
If only there were some way to change these asinine laws.
 
2012-09-21 03:14:12 AM  

brianbankerus: dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.

Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.


I'm going to see her in a few days at the House of Blues in New Orleans. Btw, this is the promo photo the local alt weekly has -

cdn.pastemagazine.com

I know that celebrities never actually look as good in real life. Regardless, I'm a fan of her stuff. The girl knows her way around a tune.
 
2012-09-21 03:18:33 AM  

basemetal: Meh, you know it's illegal in Texas, or pretty much the whole bible belt, so if you still want to do it there, you signed up for it, take the consequences.


No one is debating that. The silliness is the amount of resources dedicated to catching dangerous criminals like Fiona farking Apple and the same piddly amount of pot you probably have somewhere in your house, right now.

/at least I do
//wait you guys, there's a knock at the d
 
2012-09-21 03:38:20 AM  

brianbankerus: dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.

Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.


Pretty much everyone looks like shiat in mugshot photos. Even the hottest of the hot chicks/dudes/chickdudes looks scary in front of those cameras.

Have had her latest album on heavy rotation lately. She sounds damn good.

/must be the weed
 
2012-09-21 03:40:48 AM  
Police booked the entire 0.008 lbs of marijuana into evidence.
 
2012-09-21 03:47:39 AM  

TommyymmoT: She must have the crappiest crew on the planet. I don't know too many touring pros that wouldn't have taken the fall for her, just to insure that the show goes off.
Especially considering the piddly amount, and the likely cash bonus that would soon follow.


That is some dumb thinking there. So you would take the wrap for somebody on a drug charge? Ok lets look at this. Say they decide to charge you with a felony, like they did here, even if you don't get jail time you still have a felony that in many states can't be expunged from your record. Now you figure the music thing isn't working for you and decide to go to college. I hope you got money in the bank because you no longer qualify for federal financial aid since you now have a felony drug conviction. And you can almost forget about getting any decent paying jobs in this day and age with a felony drug record unless you know the owner of the company. And all of this just because you wanted to insure that the show goes on for a person who probably doesn't even know your name.
 
2012-09-21 03:49:50 AM  
She looks short.
 
2012-09-21 03:50:02 AM  

the_colors: brianbankerus: dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.

Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.

Pretty much everyone looks like shiat in mugshot photos. Even the hottest of the hot chicks/dudes/chickdudes looks scary in front of those cameras.

Have had her latest album on heavy rotation lately. She sounds damn good.

/must be the weed


Nope... She's just really farking haggard now.. She wasn't much to look at before but at least had that hot anorexic crazy chick thing working for her.. Now she's just fugly and crazy.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-09-21 03:51:31 AM  
Well, she fessed up to it and didn't let one of her underlings take the fall, that takes character. Either that or a desperation for publicity. But I'm hoping for the former. I have a pretty low opinion of humanity and its nice to be proven wrong every once in a great while.
 
2012-09-21 04:06:11 AM  
Not a smoker myself, but were I on border patrol stopping a tour bus, you get a teenth if I don't find anything... fish in a barrel to not have this extremely well hidden.
 
2012-09-21 04:09:06 AM  

ongbok: TommyymmoT: She must have the crappiest crew on the planet. I don't know too many touring pros that wouldn't have taken the fall for her, just to insure that the show goes off.
Especially considering the piddly amount, and the likely cash bonus that would soon follow.

That is some dumb thinking there. So you would take the wrap for somebody on a drug charge? Ok lets look at this. Say they decide to charge you with a felony, like they did here, even if you don't get jail time you still have a felony that in many states can't be expunged from your record. Now you figure the music thing isn't working for you and decide to go to college. I hope you got money in the bank because you no longer qualify for federal financial aid since you now have a felony drug conviction. And you can almost forget about getting any decent paying jobs in this day and age with a felony drug record unless you know the owner of the company. And all of this just because you wanted to insure that the show goes on for a person who probably doesn't even know your name.


When TommyymmoT said "crew," he was referring to the ragtag group of folks who travel around on busses with everyone from Radiohead (probably not a bad deal and largely legit) to, say, Everclear (the opposite of what was in the last set of brackets).

Basically, "crew" refers from everyone from a sound guy with a Master's to some guy who knows a guy who won't let the promoter in Memphis fark you on the Tuesday night guarantee while you're in between states who also has weed hook-ups in 9 states.

No "Help Wanted" section has a "Roadies" section, and if it did, it would read "Roadies/Carnies."

Someone should/would/could have, depending on your prejudices, taken the fall for this.

And probably have gotten a nice bonus.
 
2012-09-21 04:12:31 AM  

styckx: the_colors: brianbankerus: dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.

Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.

Pretty much everyone looks like shiat in mugshot photos. Even the hottest of the hot chicks/dudes/chickdudes looks scary in front of those cameras.

Have had her latest album on heavy rotation lately. She sounds damn good.

/must be the weed

Nope... She's just really farking haggard now.. She wasn't much to look at before but at least had that hot anorexic crazy chick thing working for her.. Now she's just fugly and crazy.

[i.imgur.com image 306x435]


too skinny + smoking.

Got a few girls in my office that are like this. If they had just ate right and cut out/down the smokes and booze, they'd be absolutely gorgeous. They give 35 a bad name.
 
2012-09-21 05:19:49 AM  
 
2012-09-21 05:31:05 AM  
Well that was pretty stupid of her. Doesn't she know that stuff is illegal?
 
2012-09-21 05:36:21 AM  
How much of that 10k bail does she get back? Who gets the money?
It does seem to be a fish in a barrel type of situation when they should be pursuing real crime and dangerous people.
 
2012-09-21 05:42:21 AM  
Subby, how could you not got with the "Criminal" lyrics? For shame
 
2012-09-21 06:06:32 AM  

styckx: the_colors: brianbankerus: dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.

Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.

Pretty much everyone looks like shiat in mugshot photos. Even the hottest of the hot chicks/dudes/chickdudes looks scary in front of those cameras.

Have had her latest album on heavy rotation lately. She sounds damn good.

/must be the weed

Nope... She's just really farking haggard now.. She wasn't much to look at before but at least had that hot anorexic crazy chick thing working for her.. Now she's just fugly and crazy.

[i.imgur.com image 306x435]


Jesus Christ!

Apone: "Flamethower - MOVE!!!"
 
2012-09-21 06:21:24 AM  
I guess there are worse ways to promote new album
 
2012-09-21 06:24:47 AM  

LewDux: I guess there are worse ways to promote new album


It's actually really good in my opinion but I like Fiona Apple.
 
2012-09-21 07:19:30 AM  
How long before Apple sues her for copyright infringement because she buys her drugs on rounded street corners?
 
2012-09-21 08:05:23 AM  
I didn't know Fiona Apple was still alive let alone still touring.
 
2012-09-21 08:10:40 AM  
dickfreckle:

The silliness is the amount of resources dedicated to catching dangerous criminals like Fiona farking Apple and the same piddly amount of pot you probably have somewhere in your house, right now.

www.petside.com

/ smells like butthurt
// possession of hash is a felony in Texas
 
2012-09-21 08:12:10 AM  
Very pretty!
 
2012-09-21 08:12:54 AM  
Photo of the arresting officer:

i171.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-21 08:21:53 AM  
On a related note, her sister is a better singer and so much more attractive:

Link
 
2012-09-21 08:28:07 AM  

ongbok: TommyymmoT: She must have the crappiest crew on the planet. I don't know too many touring pros that wouldn't have taken the fall for her, just to insure that the show goes off.
Especially considering the piddly amount, and the likely cash bonus that would soon follow.

That is some dumb thinking there. So you would take the wrap for somebody on a drug charge? Ok lets look at this. Say they decide to charge you with a felony, like they did here, even if you don't get jail time you still have a felony that in many states can't be expunged from your record. Now you figure the music thing isn't working for you and decide to go to college. I hope you got money in the bank because you no longer qualify for federal financial aid since you now have a felony drug conviction. And you can almost forget about getting any decent paying jobs in this day and age with a felony drug record unless you know the owner of the company. And all of this just because you wanted to insure that the show goes on for a person who probably doesn't even know your name.


you obviously never met any roadies or musicians.
 
2012-09-21 08:30:11 AM  

veedeevadeevoodee: // possession of hash is a felony in Texas


Found out a while back that my roommates thought it would be super awesome happy fun time to bake up some pot brownies in the house. I was not thrilled when I looked up the Texas laws for something like this. Short version: If it's used/consumed in a common area of the house (kitchen, bathroom, living room), all residents are considered co-possessors and get charged equally.

Said roommates are on final notice. I'm not risking my career just so some potheads can get their fix.

That being said, I think the pot laws are retarded. I've never heard of anyone smoking a joint and shooting up a school while raping puppies. Nancy Reagan lied to me. The potheads I have been around fall into these categories:

A) Annoyingly "insightful"
B) Lazy
C) Productive
D) Relaxed

Legalize/tax it.
 
2012-09-21 08:35:26 AM  
The latest polls say right at 50% of Americans want the war on pot to end, between 1/4 and 1/3 of all states now have medical marijuana, Colorado is about to vote the Treat Marijuana Like Alcohol Act about to pass and there are actual, real terribly bad drugs that need to be dealt with and law enforcement is still doing this crap?

Add to that the announcement yesterday that some compounds in marijuana can stop aggressive cancer and there is no longer any justification at all to have this drug listed as Schedule I.

Don't we, as a nation, have better reasons to fill our many prisons than this?
 
2012-09-21 08:35:55 AM  

aspAddict: If it's used/consumed in a common area of the house (kitchen, bathroom, living room), all residents are considered co-possessors and get charged equally


That is harsh. Does that hold up in court?
 
2012-09-21 08:45:02 AM  
Well, this probably won't do much for her already farked up psyche...

I've known girls like her before. No sense of humor, prone to bizarre nonsensical outbursts, and you expect to find them in the bathtub with their wrists slit one day.
 
2012-09-21 08:49:14 AM  

kmmontandon: Whatever keeps her from making music.


Her last album is fantastic. I enjoy it very much.
 
2012-09-21 08:52:44 AM  
So, did the federal prosecutor go ahead with this? I'd be very surprised.
 
2012-09-21 08:54:06 AM  
Well subby, at least they can say they are one problem closer to having solved them all.
 
2012-09-21 09:37:19 AM  

SirDigbyChickenCaesar: On a related note, her sister is a better singer and so much more attractive:

Link


Thanks for that. She's incredible.
 
2012-09-21 09:44:04 AM  
i.imgur.commedia.tumblr.com
 
2012-09-21 09:59:00 AM  

TwistedFark: styckx: the_colors: brianbankerus: dudemanbro: I'd post her bail, if you know what I mean.

Did you SEE the mug shot?

She's got some city miles on her.

Pretty much everyone looks like shiat in mugshot photos. Even the hottest of the hot chicks/dudes/chickdudes looks scary in front of those cameras.

Have had her latest album on heavy rotation lately. She sounds damn good.

/must be the weed

Nope... She's just really farking haggard now.. She wasn't much to look at before but at least had that hot anorexic crazy chick thing working for her.. Now she's just fugly and crazy.

[i.imgur.com image 306x435]

too skinny + smoking.

Got a few girls in my office that are like this. If they had just ate right and cut out/down the smokes and booze, they'd be absolutely gorgeous. They give 35 a bad name.


but, without the smokes and booze, then they'd probably become boring.
 
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