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(Athens Banner Herald)   Police: Ma'am, we know your husband is in the house, where is he? Wife: I haven't seen him all day. Young daughter: Mommy, you just locked him in the closet   (onlineathens.com) divider line 40
    More: Amusing, mommies  
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7146 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Sep 2012 at 10:54 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-20 06:21:57 PM
newsliteimgs.s3.amazonaws.com
 
2012-09-20 07:40:17 PM
i236.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-20 09:31:26 PM
If you don't raise your kids right, this is what happens.
 
2012-09-20 09:45:47 PM
Daddy issues in 5 years.

Waiting...
 
2012-09-20 10:21:45 PM
"Man's best friend" indeed.
 
2012-09-20 10:30:55 PM
FTFA: Parham initially refused orders to come down, but he complied after an officer threatened to use pepper spray, according to police.

Pepper spray? I thought police were only allowed to use that stuff on peaceful protestors...
 
2012-09-20 10:47:35 PM
He has a case pending in Superior Court from an arrest in June, when he allegedly struck his wife in the face while driving in a car with an open container of alcohol, according to court records.


A bottle of Jack to the yapper?


/I can read it how I want
 
2012-09-20 10:54:49 PM
It was a pretty good hiding place.

I don't get hiding from the cops. You're not going to be on the run forever and the longer it takes for them to get you, the more trouble you're in.
 
2012-09-20 10:59:26 PM
Snitches get stitches.
 
2012-09-20 10:59:58 PM

And he would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for that meddlin' kid! 


/Zoink!

 
2012-09-20 11:02:07 PM
Kids say the darndest things.
 
2012-09-20 11:04:19 PM
That reminds me to smack my daughter before she go to bed tonight
 
2012-09-20 11:05:19 PM
Pavel Marazov smiles. From the grave.
 
2012-09-20 11:05:51 PM

Fark Me To Tears: FTFA: Parham initially refused orders to come down, but he complied after an officer threatened to use pepper spray, according to police.

Pepper spray? I thought police were only allowed to use that stuff on peaceful protestors...


See they're also allowed to use it on people who won't come out of the closet.
 
2012-09-20 11:08:45 PM
Kids only lie when its their own ass in trouble.
 
2012-09-20 11:11:53 PM

Jae0o0: Kids only lie when its their own ass in trouble.


Corollary: Kids tell the truth about their criminal Dad when he beats his wife (and probably his kids).
 
2012-09-20 11:12:22 PM
www.troll.me
 
2012-09-20 11:12:34 PM
Ten dollars wife bails him out, and he beats her up again the next day.
 
2012-09-20 11:14:02 PM
There's been quite a few Fark lines to the Athens Banner Herald lately... are we in need of a Clarke County tag?

/3 year Athenian
//the UGA football team probably contributed to half the Athens tags
 
2012-09-20 11:14:05 PM

brianbankerus: It was a pretty good hiding place.

I don't get hiding from the cops. You're not going to be on the run forever and the longer it takes for them to get you, the more trouble you're in.


Might be a good idea to sober up and call a lawyer before you turn yourself in.
 
2012-09-20 11:14:09 PM
www.parenting-child-development.com

She's gonna get such a beating.

For many, many years...
 
2012-09-20 11:17:00 PM

Sock Ruh Tease: Corollary: Kids tell the truth about their criminal Dad when he beats his wife (and probably his kids).


I'm guessing the girl was about 4 (she was in a carseat when she witnessed a fight), and I'm not sure a kid that young could plan such a revenge. Probably was just trying to help. But who knows.
 
2012-09-20 11:20:55 PM
Homer Stephens Parham, 51, was found hiding on a ledge inside the closet and was arrested, police said.

How big was this friggin closet?
 
2012-09-20 11:22:43 PM

brianbankerus: I don't get hiding from the cops. You're not going to be on the run forever and the longer it takes for them to get you, the less likely they'll keep looking.

 
2012-09-20 11:26:05 PM

jaylectricity: Homer Stephens Parham, 51, was found hiding on a ledge inside the closet and was arrested, police said.

How big was this friggin closet?


Shoes, man. Bieotches lurve shoes.
 
2012-09-20 11:27:25 PM

The Jami Turman Fan Club: Might be a good idea to sober up and call a lawyer before you turn yourself in.


Okay, yep. Can get gentler treatment turning yourself in on your own terms. Tom Delay got a handjob and a cappuccino when he turned himself in.
 
2012-09-20 11:28:54 PM
www.thereligionofpeace.com
snitches get stitches
 
2012-09-20 11:29:42 PM
Kids say the darndest things.
 
2012-09-20 11:35:40 PM
Dad is 51 and looks 60. Daughter is under 10. I blame Viagra, and so should he.
 
2012-09-20 11:38:51 PM
If you're going to hide on a shelf, do it right.


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-09-20 11:52:45 PM

nytmare: Fark Me To Tears: FTFA: Parham initially refused orders to come down, but he complied after an officer threatened to use pepper spray, according to police.

Pepper spray? I thought police were only allowed to use that stuff on peaceful protestors...

See they're also allowed to use it on people who won't come out of the closet.


^^Winner^^
 
2012-09-20 11:58:03 PM
Maybe next time he won't F the F up and ask his children to cover for him. Dumbass.
 
2012-09-21 12:08:55 AM

brianbankerus: It was a pretty good hiding place.

I don't get hiding from the cops. You're not going to be on the run forever and the longer it takes for them to get you, the more trouble you're in.


Not actually.

If the cops can't prove you were there, it's inadmisable.

Not only that, but unless you're Osama Bin Laden or Sadam Hussein, a certain level of hiding will protect you from the authorities. The CIA and NATO don't team up to use satalite images and telephone chatter to catch a shoplifter who stole $30 worth of peanut butter and saltines. Now, if you're the zodiac or another big fish, the search will be more in depth.
 
2012-09-21 12:25:16 AM
As an Athenian, I was more shocked to learn that I need to throw out my spinach that I bought at Kroger (previous story). Thanks Fark!
 
2012-09-21 12:55:34 AM
kid is grounded for life
 
2012-09-21 12:59:46 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-09-21 01:03:52 AM
rkellyweb.yaia.com

"Snitches get stitches"
 
2012-09-21 04:27:58 AM
Someone's not getting any xmas presents for a few lifetimes...
 
2012-09-21 06:33:47 AM
www.etonline.com

"Has anyone pointed out that children have a propensity for making absurd statements?"
 
2012-09-22 03:13:55 AM
The officers were unable to see that high, so one reached up with a cellphone and snapped a photograph that showed Parham balled up in the tiny space, police said.

That's a clever tactic for the average person who wants to see into a dark space, but shouldn't police officers on a hide-and-seek mission come equipped with flashlights?
 
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