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(Topless Robot)   The seven most useless Star Trek characters. Missing from the list: the entire cast of Voyager   (toplessrobot.com) divider line 257
    More: Fail, Star Trek, Voyager, lounge singer, Rick Berman, Worf, Wesley Crusher, Gene Roddenberry, Michael Dorn  
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11078 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 20 Sep 2012 at 1:49 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-20 10:36:53 PM

Spanky McStupid: [www.embracingthenerd.com image 246x300]

This guy gave up the Enterprise on a regular basis ...



[www.startrek.com image 320x240]

This guy would not.


Picard was useless.


Kirk's away mission protocol jeopardized the entire command staff on a regular basis.


Picard knew how to delegate.
 
2012-09-20 10:43:32 PM

Spanky McStupid: [www.embracingthenerd.com image 246x300]

This guy gave up the Enterprise on a regular basis ...



[www.startrek.com image 320x240]

This guy would not.


Picard was useless.


What are you talking about? The ship was under enemy control or powerless many more times than Picard's Enterprise.
 
2012-09-20 10:52:56 PM

peterthx: Except the fact that Gates McFadden didn't get pregnant until the 5th season of TNG.

She left because apparently Maurice Hurley wanted some and she didn't want to give it up, so she was *fired*. When Hurley left after the end of season 2 Rick Berman asked for her to come back, especially since Muldaur was very unhappy with her experience on the show and didn't want to come back.


I stand corrected. I was always under the impression it had to do with her wanting to start a family and leave the show.

On a similar note, is the rumor I heard with Voyager true? That the reason Chakotay and Seven were a couple in Season 7 is they threw him a bone because he wanted to leave, as it had been known for a while he hated being on the show?
 
2012-09-20 10:57:23 PM

BizarreMan: Janeway was twice the captain Picard was. She certainly had bigger balls. Danger comes along and she's full speed ahead, arm the torpedoes. Picard is everybody to the ready room, let's have a meeting. Then another meeting, and then what does everybody think we should do followed by magic science saves the ship and end credits.


Sisko had the biggest balls of them all.
images3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2012-09-20 11:02:11 PM

cman: Doctor was the saving grace in Voyager. If it weren't for him, Voyager would not be watchable.

There, I said it


Nope. Not even he could save that vile bucket of shiat.
 
2012-09-20 11:04:57 PM

FirstNationalBastard: OnlyM3: whidbey
>>> YOU SHUT UP ABOUT GUINAN

No kidding. Incredibly subtle, funny,

"Because you're a droid and I'm a 'noid".

Yeah. Hilarious stuff there. Can you say "Magic Negro"? What an insulting character.
ST - The original series, we got Uhura a strong, brilliant, competent and accomplished woman living prop in the background that never really had anything to say other than "Hailing Frequences open, Captain" (who happens to be black).

"

FTFReality.


Considering the times, they were lucky they were allowed to have a female black officer on the bridge at all. You have to remember the cultural context of the Original Series or it looks very racist and sexist by current standards.
 
2012-09-20 11:20:38 PM
true storie.. i actually had sex with troi
 
2012-09-20 11:21:48 PM
pheelix:
Sisko had the biggest balls of them all.
[images3.wikia.nocookie.net image 634x489]

Sure, it takes really big balls to sit on a stupid space station.

/God I hate DS9 the most...it's Star "Trek", not Star sit on your ass in space
 
2012-09-20 11:23:04 PM

peterthx: th0th: Pulaski had a raw deal for one reason: Gates McFadden got pregnant and wanted to leave the show. They needed someone to fill the void while her contract was re-negotiated, and I thought she provided a good foil to Data and Picard while bringing something new - a bit of maturity - to the role. In a few of the Trek novels her character got a bit more backstory, but overall I don't feel it's right to castigate what was essentially a guest cast member - same with Guinan.

Except the fact that Gates McFadden didn't get pregnant until the 5th season of TNG.

She left because apparently Maurice Hurley wanted some and she didn't want to give it up, so she was *fired*. When Hurley left after the end of season 2 Rick Berman asked for her to come back, especially since Muldaur was very unhappy with her experience on the show and didn't want to come back.


She was apparently abducted by aliens. Real aliens, in real life.
 
2012-09-20 11:33:07 PM

Boudica's War Tampon: I just finished rewatching The Doomsday Machine. I hope William Windom got a nomination for that role.

He almost did a Shatner chew-job with the role but pulled back nicely when he needed to.

Lovely episode.



I'm in my 40s... but every time I hear that scary music I get goose bumps.
 
2012-09-20 11:41:06 PM
Voyager got really good when Ron Moore replaced Janeway with Edward James Olmos
 
2012-09-20 11:43:10 PM

pheelix: BizarreMan: Janeway was twice the captain Picard was. She certainly had bigger balls. Danger comes along and she's full speed ahead, arm the torpedoes. Picard is everybody to the ready room, let's have a meeting. Then another meeting, and then what does everybody think we should do followed by magic science saves the ship and end credits.

Sisko had the biggest balls of them all.
[images3.wikia.nocookie.net image 634x489]


He punched out Q. That's a way of dealing with god-like entities Kirk would approve of.
 
2012-09-20 11:44:30 PM

Hyatus: pheelix:
Sisko had the biggest balls of them all.
[images3.wikia.nocookie.net image 634x489]

Sure, it takes really big balls to sit on a stupid space station.

/God I hate DS9 the most...it's Star "Trek", not Star sit on your ass in space


DS9 had the best developed characters, but it felt less Trek than the rest, probably why I preferred it.
 
2012-09-20 11:47:32 PM

Ed Grubermann: FirstNationalBastard: OnlyM3: whidbey
>>> YOU SHUT UP ABOUT GUINAN

No kidding. Incredibly subtle, funny,

"Because you're a droid and I'm a 'noid".

Yeah. Hilarious stuff there. Can you say "Magic Negro"? What an insulting character.
ST - The original series, we got Uhura a strong, brilliant, competent and accomplished woman living prop in the background that never really had anything to say other than "Hailing Frequences open, Captain" (who happens to be black).

"

FTFReality.

Considering the times, they were lucky they were allowed to have a female black officer on the bridge at all. You have to remember the cultural context of the Original Series or it looks very racist and sexist by current standards.


I do. And for the time, Uhura was probably a role model for both women and black people just by virtue that she wasn't a servant or stereotypical comic relief. But, during TOS, she wasn't exactly much more than a background character that said "Hailing Frequencies open, Captain", and even Nichelle Nichols knew that, hated it, and nearly quit the show over it.
 
2012-09-20 11:48:25 PM
The best thing that Malcom ever did was the episode when he and I think Tucker thought they were doing to die and he recorded a message for his girlfriend back on Earth. The scene started towards the end of the recording and it was so heartfelt and emotional but for some reason Tucker looked bored and pissed off at it all. And then when he got to the end of the recording "and I'll always love you forever Amanada." Malcom goes "End Recording." pauses for a few seconds and then goes "Letter to Sarah. Dearest Sarah, by the time you hear this I will be dead..." and repeats pretty much the entire last message to the new girl. He had like six girlfriends back on Earth.
The guy was a player.
 
2012-09-20 11:49:16 PM

FirstNationalBastard: Ed Grubermann: FirstNationalBastard: OnlyM3: whidbey
>>> YOU SHUT UP ABOUT GUINAN

No kidding. Incredibly subtle, funny,

"Because you're a droid and I'm a 'noid".

Yeah. Hilarious stuff there. Can you say "Magic Negro"? What an insulting character.
ST - The original series, we got Uhura a strong, brilliant, competent and accomplished woman living prop in the background that never really had anything to say other than "Hailing Frequences open, Captain" (who happens to be black).

"

FTFReality.

Considering the times, they were lucky they were allowed to have a female black officer on the bridge at all. You have to remember the cultural context of the Original Series or it looks very racist and sexist by current standards.

I do. And for the time, Uhura was probably a role model for both women and black people just by virtue that she wasn't a servant or stereotypical comic relief. But, during TOS, she wasn't exactly much more than a background character that said "Hailing Frequencies open, Captain", and even Nichelle Nichols knew that, hated it, and nearly quit the show over it.


She got to be captain for an episode and saved Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and some fourth dude in TAS episode "The Lorelei Signal" with phasers blazing.
 
2012-09-20 11:53:43 PM

Actor_au: The best thing that Malcom ever did was the episode when he and I think Tucker thought they were doing to die and he recorded a message for his girlfriend back on Earth. The scene started towards the end of the recording and it was so heartfelt and emotional but for some reason Tucker looked bored and pissed off at it all. And then when he got to the end of the recording "and I'll always love you forever Amanada." Malcom goes "End Recording." pauses for a few seconds and then goes "Letter to Sarah. Dearest Sarah, by the time you hear this I will be dead..." and repeats pretty much the entire last message to the new girl. He had like six girlfriends back on Earth.
The guy was a player.


Beards, each one of them.

Reed was supposed to be Trek's first gay regular character.
 
2012-09-21 12:10:55 AM

Spanky McStupid: [www.embracingthenerd.com image 246x300]

This guy gave up the Enterprise on a regular basis ...



[www.startrek.com image 320x240]

This guy would not.


Picard was useless.


i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-21 12:18:59 AM

FirstNationalBastard: Actor_au: The best thing that Malcom ever did was the episode when he and I think Tucker thought they were doing to die and he recorded a message for his girlfriend back on Earth. The scene started towards the end of the recording and it was so heartfelt and emotional but for some reason Tucker looked bored and pissed off at it all. And then when he got to the end of the recording "and I'll always love you forever Amanada." Malcom goes "End Recording." pauses for a few seconds and then goes "Letter to Sarah. Dearest Sarah, by the time you hear this I will be dead..." and repeats pretty much the entire last message to the new girl. He had like six girlfriends back on Earth.
The guy was a player.

Beards, each one of them.

Reed was supposed to be Trek's first gay regular character.


So was Lt.Hawk in First Contact.
 
2012-09-21 12:29:52 AM
verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com

'Nuff said.
 
2012-09-21 12:45:30 AM

Your_Huckleberry: FirstNationalBastard: Actor_au: The best thing that Malcom ever did was the episode when he and I think Tucker thought they were doing to die and he recorded a message for his girlfriend back on Earth. The scene started towards the end of the recording and it was so heartfelt and emotional but for some reason Tucker looked bored and pissed off at it all. And then when he got to the end of the recording "and I'll always love you forever Amanada." Malcom goes "End Recording." pauses for a few seconds and then goes "Letter to Sarah. Dearest Sarah, by the time you hear this I will be dead..." and repeats pretty much the entire last message to the new girl. He had like six girlfriends back on Earth.
The guy was a player.

Beards, each one of them.

Reed was supposed to be Trek's first gay regular character.

So was Lt.Hawk in First Contact.


They always kill the hot guy ;_;
 
2012-09-21 12:50:42 AM

PsyLord: Can someone post the list (don't want to click on the TR link since it has the T word).

RexTalionis: The one thing I really loved about Enterprise was the MACOs - space marines.
[www.thechoad.com image 599x405]

As far as those MACO's, why don't StarFleet security personnel wear armor that can handle phaser fire? I remember one episode where the Reptilians boarded Enterprise and the MACO's kept shooting them with their phasers and did mostly jack squat since they had energy dissipating "armor".


They sorta had that in the Star Trek Elite Forces video game, set on Voyager. Was pretty good, using the Quake 3 engine.
 
2012-09-21 01:15:16 AM

DamnYankees: The English Major: ENT had T'Pol as nothing more than technobabble eye candy.

Disagree with this. I thought T'Pol was a pretty good character. The security officer, whatever that guy's name was, was the most useless.


No, no, you're forgetting Mayweather, the pilot. Though, to be fair, the writers did, too.
 
2012-09-21 01:18:39 AM

rhiannon: She was apparently abducted by aliens. Real aliens, in real life.

  

No matter how I read it...

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-09-21 01:31:37 AM
I knew this thread would be worth reading.
 
2012-09-21 01:38:13 AM

th0th: On a similar note, is the rumor I heard with Voyager true? That the reason Chakotay and Seven were a couple in Season 7 is they threw him a bone because he wanted to leave, as it had been known for a while he hated being on the show?


I've always read Robert Beltran was angry about his character (or lack thereof) but this rumor doesn't seem have much truth since the romance came so late into the seventh (and final) season that he would have had to break contract to leave at that point. Most fans complained that the romance came out of nowhere and wondered why it was such a prominent plot line of the finale.
 
2012-09-21 01:43:10 AM

d-fens99: Deanna Troi? Something about her appeals to me.

[images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 694x530]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 320x244]


Yeah, but you have to admit her only job was to stand on the bridge and say, "They're hiding something..."
 
2012-09-21 01:58:10 AM
For all-time usless Star Trek character I nominate SULU:

www.startrek.com

Not only was he useless, he didn't appear in several second season TOS episodes because he was off filming The Green Berets and NOBODY NOTICED!

WTF was he doing as a *Captain* anyway? What did he ever do that Starfleet would think he'd be the best commander of a top-of-the-line ship like the USS Excelsior?

/at least Uhura was eye-candy on a bridge full of dudes...
//sorry George
 
2012-09-21 02:02:51 AM
I know he was normally pretty solid, but I remember watching "Final Mission" and thinking that Geordi had to be the worst gorram engineer in Starfleet.

"Ok, captain I checked out this guy's shuttlecraft and it looks safe."

[Five minutes later => shuttle breaks down and crashes]

"Geordi, we need to finish [technobabble] so we can save this planet quickly and then get back to searching for the Captain."

"No problem, Commander, I'm on it."

[Five minutes later => something breaks so farking bad that they get held up even longer]

It wasn't representative of his usual cleverness, but in that episode, Geordi couldn't do ANYTHING right.
 
2012-09-21 02:05:16 AM

Hyatus: pheelix:
Sisko had the biggest balls of them all.
[images3.wikia.nocookie.net image 634x489]

Sure, it takes really big balls to sit on a stupid space station.

/God I hate DS9 the most...it's Star "Trek", not Star sit on your ass in space


First Contact with the Dominion

They were not just sitting on their ass in space

/Bashir's ex-girlfriend chose a ship like Enterprise
//She regretted it because she didn't feel she was doing
anything useful in comparison to Bashir
 
2012-09-21 02:13:58 AM

Stavr0: Parasites from 'Conspiracy'

This could have been an epic arc story -- Monster battle between the Infected and the non-infected, transcending races, even more reaching than the Dominion War.



It was supposed to be a tie-in to the borg, but the writers strike messed that up somehow.
 
2012-09-21 03:17:54 AM

lasercannon: Hey subby Seven of Nine had some use, three uses in fact.


And one more for Barack Obama. Without her he would still be in the Illinois legislature.
 
2012-09-21 06:58:41 AM

Hyatus: Sure, it takes really big balls to sit on a stupid space station.

/God I hate DS9 the most...it's Star "Trek", not Star sit on your ass in space


Would like a word
 
2012-09-21 06:59:36 AM
Try that agin

t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-09-21 10:21:21 AM
i777.photobucket.com

i777.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-21 11:16:08 AM

d-fens99: Deanna Troi? Something about her appeals to me.

[images2.wikia.nocookie.net image 694x530]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 320x244]


Me too! Something is nippling at the back of my mind, but I can't put my finger on it ...
 
2012-09-21 11:18:33 AM

Hyatus: pheelix:
Sisko had the biggest balls of them all.
[images3.wikia.nocookie.net image 634x489]

Sure, it takes really big balls to sit on a stupid space station.

/God I hate DS9 the most...it's Star "Trek", not Star sit on your ass in space


Balls. Of. Steel.

His first encounter with godlike beings resulted in his being made their emissary.

During a battle with the Klingon Chancellor's fleet he managed to fire off what seemed like at least 10,000 photon torpedoes while fighting off Batleth weilding Klingons with his bare farking hands. The Klingons retreated.

He punched out Q, despite knowing Q that could destroy the entire Federation with snap of his fingers.

He went back in time to save Captain Kirk.

Made good on a threat to poison the atmosphere of a planet, forcing a colony to evacuate, all so he could apprehend just one man.

He falsified documents and was an accessory to murder in a successful plot with Garek to draw the Romulans into the war against the Dominion and was OK with it.

Sisko's such a badass that after Worf killed Gowron in honorable combat, he decided he'd rather hang out with Sisko than become Chancellor of the Klingon Empire.

He fired on and disabled a Federation ship that got in his way.

Despite being a mere Captain, he was given the job of fleet commander in a decisive battle against the Dominion. He won a barrel of blood wine on a bet General Martok that he'd board DS9 first when their combined fleets battled to recapture the station from the Dominion.

He did all of this while sitting on his ass.
 
2012-09-21 11:21:52 AM
bynkii.com
 
2012-09-21 03:10:48 PM
Whelp, looks like those two guys who were oozing jizz over Guinan have shot their wad.

Worst.

Character.

Ever.
 
2012-09-21 03:52:29 PM

Old_Chief_Scott: Whelp, looks like those two guys who were oozing jizz over Guinan have shot their wad.

Worst.

Character.

Ever.


I liked Guinan when the show was first airing because they gave her such a mysterious past that you were always waiting for some kind of big payoff. Q was afraid of her, she had some mysterious history with Picard, and she palled around with Mark Twain.

Unfortunately by the time the show was done, she was simply the magic negro and that's it. Such wasted potential.
 
2012-09-21 04:33:55 PM

pheelix: He did all of this while sitting on his ass.


...and while posing as a Klingon in a pre-battle party, beat the shiat out of a Klingon because he was bragging about killing a former colleague, blamed it on the Klingon getting in the way of Sisko's blood wine.
 
2012-09-21 04:35:11 PM

pheelix: Sisko's such a badass that after Worf killed Gowron in honorable combat, he decided he'd rather hang out with Sisko than become Chancellor of the Klingon Empire.


bwahahahahahaha
 
2012-09-21 07:20:01 PM

NeoCortex42: rickycal78: NeoCortex42: Spanky McStupid: [www.embracingthenerd.com image 246x300]

This guy gave up the Enterprise on a regular basis ...



[www.startrek.com image 320x240]

This guy would not.


Picard was useless.

Kirk detonated his Enterprise. Picard simply made the mistake of letting Troi drive.

Kirk detonating his Enterprise took out his enemies, what exactly did letting Troi drive accomplish, other than destroying another Enterprise?

Yeah, well...Kirk went out like a punk.

Picard was willing to detonate his Enterprise to kill the Borg. He managed to kill the bad guy AND save the ship.


Kirk only went out like a punk because Picard was dumb enough to bring him back in time to drop a bridge on him. Couldn't they have returned to stop the bad guy at any time prior to 5 minutes before the doomsday bomb?
 
2012-09-21 07:42:59 PM

Fano: Kirk only went out like a punk because Picard was dumb enough to bring him back in time to drop a bridge on him. Couldn't they have returned to stop the bad guy at any time prior to 5 minutes before the doomsday bomb?


That was only one of the plot holes in that film.

As for Picard and the Borg, he could have destroyed the Borg and pussied out. He should have been court martialed for that.
 
2012-09-21 08:28:38 PM

Mugato: Fano: Kirk only went out like a punk because Picard was dumb enough to bring him back in time to drop a bridge on him. Couldn't they have returned to stop the bad guy at any time prior to 5 minutes before the doomsday bomb?

That was only one of the plot holes in that film.

As for Picard and the Borg, he could have destroyed the Borg and pussied out. He should have been court martialed for that.


Which part do the Hardliners resent Picard more for, Locutus or Hugh?
 
2012-09-21 08:41:59 PM

Your_Huckleberry: Mugato: Fano: Kirk only went out like a punk because Picard was dumb enough to bring him back in time to drop a bridge on him. Couldn't they have returned to stop the bad guy at any time prior to 5 minutes before the doomsday bomb?

That was only one of the plot holes in that film.

As for Picard and the Borg, he could have destroyed the Borg and pussied out. He should have been court martialed for that.

Which part do the Hardliners resent Picard more for, Locutus or Hugh?


Probably Hugh, since that was a willful choice and not forced upon him.
 
2012-09-21 08:43:03 PM

Mugato: Fano: Kirk only went out like a punk because Picard was dumb enough to bring him back in time to drop a bridge on him. Couldn't they have returned to stop the bad guy at any time prior to 5 minutes before the doomsday bomb?

That was only one of the plot holes in that film.

As for Picard and the Borg, he could have destroyed the Borg and pussied out. He should have been court martialed for that.


And for plot holes in TNG films, none are mightier than the ones that make Picard into an action hero that mows people down. If he was willing to save even the Borg, a species that exists to assimilate and destroy everything else, at great personal risk, why would he go whup-ass on anything else? How was he NOT court-martialed for letting the Borg live?
 
2012-09-21 09:04:34 PM

Your_Huckleberry: Which part do the Hardliners resent Picard more for, Locutus or Hugh?


What does Hardliners mean?

Well anyway, Picard should have been tried for treason for letting Hugh go.
 
2012-09-21 09:35:10 PM

Mugato: Your_Huckleberry: Which part do the Hardliners resent Picard more for, Locutus or Hugh?

What does Hardliners mean?

Well anyway, Picard should have been tried for treason for letting Hugh go.


But it set the stage for Lor's lulzy return later.
 
2012-09-21 09:35:33 PM

Mugato: Your_Huckleberry: Which part do the Hardliners resent Picard more for, Locutus or Hugh?

What does Hardliners mean?

Well anyway, Picard should have been tried for treason for letting Hugh go.


In this case, Hardliners could be Section 31 types or even someone who may have fought the Borg or lost someone to the Borg. Like Sisko. You could easily make the argument that anyone who lost someone to the Borg after Hugh would sure hate Picard(and LaForge,too)

That should have been the reason Starfleet ordered Picard out of the fight in First Contact.
 
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