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(Time)   Ten ways to rejuvenate your brain while at work. Shockingly, doing your work is not one of the ten ways   (business.time.com) divider line 50
    More: PSA  
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10104 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Sep 2012 at 12:14 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-19 12:11:20 AM
Actually, I wouldn't say its that shocking.
 
2012-09-19 12:17:41 AM
I'd rather get my work done than do most of that shiat.
 
2012-09-19 12:19:13 AM
Avoid the politics tab or Fark altogether until election season blows over?
 
2012-09-19 12:19:33 AM
A vacation. Great idea. Who's payin' for that?
 
2012-09-19 12:19:55 AM
Shot of whiskey not on the list?
 
2012-09-19 12:20:00 AM
I'd say 80% of all factory fark ups from cutting the metal too short to cutting off/smashing a finger is due to zoning out on the job. That shiat is boring and also the best motivator to go to college ever.
 
2012-09-19 12:20:37 AM
Ramen....
 
2012-09-19 12:21:32 AM
I smoke two joints in the morning....surprisingly absent.
 
2012-09-19 12:25:21 AM
Permission to crank down?
 
2012-09-19 12:25:24 AM
STFU & GBTW
 
2012-09-19 12:26:20 AM
Reads like a list of 10 things I'd get in trouble for doing at work. Nice.
 
2012-09-19 12:26:48 AM
Stare at the new receptionist's low-cut blouse and then rubbing one out in the handicap stall has been working just fine, thanks.
 
2012-09-19 12:28:53 AM
Ugh. I'm a code monkey, and I spent maybe 15 minutes at my actual desk this afternoon. I didn't have time to do any of that.

//I was at 3 separate test stations this afternoon testing new code, so much for not multitasking.
 
2012-09-19 12:29:59 AM

RoyHobbs22: I'd rather get my work done than do most of that shiat.


Yeah, because it becomes a beacon of logic and understanding after that.
 
2012-09-19 12:30:51 AM
lh6.googleusercontent.com

oblig
 
2012-09-19 12:32:48 AM
I don't spend a lot of time working to begin with. I spend more time driving to the job than I do anything else. Today I worked for maybe a total of an hour but I spent over 4 hours driving. Rush was amusing to listen to though. With all the stupid that comes out of his mouth I tend to laugh a lot and laughing is good for you.
 
2012-09-19 12:38:47 AM
But all that stuff is time not spent working. Which means the company loses money. And losing money is communism.
 
2012-09-19 12:38:58 AM
So work 60 of every 90 minutes, nap at work, ask for a revised schedule because I'm not a morning/evening person, take vacations and smell up my work area... that's a ticket to the top ever I heard it!
 
2012-09-19 12:42:37 AM

M0nkeyp0x: RoyHobbs22: I'd rather get my work done than do most of that shiat.

Yeah, because it becomes a beacon of logic and understanding after that.


I guess I'd rather abuse my brain. Certain cells anyway.
 
2012-09-19 12:42:59 AM

Smeggy Smurf: STFU & GBTW


GFY, ya NAZI.
/WTF
//BFD
 
2012-09-19 12:48:24 AM
Neuroscience is so stupid. Numbers 2) and 3) directly and explicitly contradict each other.
 
2012-09-19 12:54:45 AM
don't waste your peak work time at a doctor's appointment

But what if I'm a doctor?
 
2012-09-19 12:57:01 AM
What about looking at pictures of Japanese women in business attire?
 
2012-09-19 12:59:58 AM
Beer should be on the list. My brain is very juvenile when I give it beer.
 
2012-09-19 01:03:00 AM
1. Buy a good office chair, or get a standing desk.

fark it, I just have a cigarette every hour. That requires walking up stairs, opening and closing a dumpster thinger, and walking at least 80 feet.

2. Do not multitask

No problem. I try not to task.

3. Use all your senses

I sit near the bathroom and microwave, so no. Especially if they're in use at the same time. Thinking about what I typed just made me even more disgusted.

4. Don't make too many decisions in one day

Again, not a problem. I try to stay near 0.001 decisions per day, cause that's what my bosses want I think.

5. Take a quick break every 20 minutes

Didn't we have a thread about a dude who walked in on his employee during his 20 minute break? I'll just have my cigarettes, thank you.

6. Work with your own circadian rhythms

That's cute. They think I'm self-employed.

7. Relax for 10 minutes every 90 minutes

Why not? As long as I'm taking cig breaks and whacking off, this sounds like a great idea.

8. Take power naps

Fap.

9. Experience nature-preferably real, but fake will do

If anyone needs me I'll be in my lab. Or my doe. Whatever.

10. Take a vacation

To Enumclaw? That sounds about right.
 
2012-09-19 01:07:36 AM

Bennie Crabtree: Neuroscience is so stupid. Numbers 2) and 3) directly and explicitly contradict each other.


Background music is not an example of multi tasking. Certainly not in the same way that driving and talking on the phone are
 
2012-09-19 01:08:47 AM

meat0918: Ugh. I'm a code monkey, and I spent maybe 15 minutes at my actual desk this afternoon. I didn't have time to do any of that.

//I was at 3 separate test stations this afternoon testing new code, so much for not multitasking.


On my last project, I was able to get away with multitasking as follows:

1. Start a task.
2. Kick off the relevant automated tests, set up the test machine to e-mail me when done.
3. Start next task.
4. With any luck, the second task will be ready for testing around the same time the test results from the first task are ready.
5. Check in first task, kick off the tests for the second task.
6. Start third task.
7. And so on...

That minimized the number of mental context switches I had to do, while getting things done in parallel. Alas, I can't do that with my current project because it's almost entirely GUI code that has to be tested manually.
 
2012-09-19 01:18:08 AM
What about Masturbation?!

Has ANYONE mentioned masturbation yet!?
 
2012-09-19 01:18:55 AM

BronyMedic: What about Masturbation?!

Has ANYONE mentioned masturbation yet!?


Won't somebody think of the wankers?
 
2012-09-19 01:20:50 AM
Hi, Boss. Thanks for seeing me. Oh, fine, yes, fine. Say, I just wanted to tell you about a few things that I've decided to do from now on to improve the quality of my workday here. Mm hmm. Ok... You're going to have to start scheduling our meetings at around eleven, instead of at eight like you do now. And I'm going to need a secretary to take my phone calls, so I can focus on one thing at a time while I work. The array of scented candles I've fired up on my desk should help me with that as well. I've worked out a new routine for my breaks, too; I figure a quick one every twenty minutes, and another ten-minute break every hour and a half, and a nap in the afternoon should be about enough. I'll need one of the window offices, so I can look at trees and clouds from time to time. I guess that seems like a lot, but you'll have time to work this all out while I'm taking a vacation. Going mountain biking, I think. Well, that's about all I came to tell you. Hmm? Uh, why are you handing me an empty box?
 
2012-09-19 01:30:42 AM
Clamato and vodak.
 
2012-09-19 01:37:59 AM

BronyMedic: What about Masturbation?!

Has ANYONE mentioned masturbation yet!?


You mean launching your potato?

(/c'mon, with the ref lockout we need some new slang)
 
2012-09-19 01:44:12 AM
"panties" applies to this thread too.
 
2012-09-19 01:50:05 AM

KrispyKritter: "panties" applies to this thread too.


Mmm....panties.
 
2012-09-19 01:53:02 AM
I'm a cashier at Walmart. Thinking harder about my work is not going to rejuvenate my brain.
 
2012-09-19 01:57:33 AM

picturescrazy: Reads like a list of 10 things I'd get in trouble for doing at work. Nice.


Exactly. I work for a fascist corporation that doesn't even let us sit down for 8 hours.
 
2012-09-19 01:58:01 AM

KrispyKritter: "panties" applies to this thread too.


That makes me moist.
 
2012-09-19 02:44:38 AM
10. Take a vacation*

*not applicable in united states
 
2012-09-19 03:06:19 AM
Isn't doing your job the reason most people need a brain rejuvenation in the first place, preferably in liquid form?

Here my list of one: If you job sucks, get a better job; if you can't get a better job, tough tits, man up nancy.

Then browse Fark all day on your mobile, no one else around you will give a shiat either.
 
2012-09-19 03:12:40 AM
Power Naps...love 'em.

That's why I park my car in the back.
No shame...I'm on call 24/7...and they don't hesitate to use it.

No way not to multi-task...too many things going on...too many interruptions.
But what I do is the whittle away technique.
And I close as many windows as possible.

since I'm an afternoon person...I avoid early stuff...put myself in admin mode. (or cruise mode)

And I don't hesitate giving myself a break.
 
2012-09-19 03:21:56 AM
Is this another one of those office worker problem articles?

Waaah, someone drank the last cup and didn't make more! Waaah!
 
2012-09-19 04:38:57 AM
Take a powernap....

What better way to make yourself look productive to your bosses bosses boss who stops by to say hi....
 
2012-09-19 04:54:06 AM

I sound fat: Take a powernap....

What better way to make yourself look productive to your bosses bosses boss who stops by to say hi....


That's why I have a Face Time Party Snoozer.
img708.imageshack.us
Works like a charm.
 
2012-09-19 05:33:32 AM
We can't multitask?
I'm typing this and chewing on this pen at the same time just fine.
 
2012-09-19 07:59:27 AM

I sound fat: Take a powernap....

What better way to make yourself look productive to your bosses bosses boss who stops by to say hi....


I have a server room, up on the mezzanine, that can only be accessed by stairs (well, the Navy ship-board equivalent of "stairs"). And I only have the key. And it's nice and cool up there.
 
2012-09-19 09:15:23 AM
binaural beat meditation.
 
2012-09-19 09:22:55 AM
Adderall and xanax.
 
2012-09-19 10:19:55 AM
www.global-air.com

When you add cyber-slacking to coffee breaks, smoke breaks, long lunches, and talking about sports, some employees don't get any work done at all. (new window)
 
2012-09-19 10:21:07 AM

AaronSynn: We can't multitask?
I'm typing this and chewing on this pen at the same time just fine.


Multitasking is a prerequisite for my job. Who's going to tell the bosses I'm not farking doing that any more?
 
2012-09-19 07:17:03 PM
This article is telling you to quit your job or be fired for being a slacker. What nonsense.
 
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