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(Business Insider)   Russian sub spotted in gulf. Of Mexico. Cold war or Coke war?   (businessinsider.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, Gulf of Mexico, cold-war, Russians, cat-and-mouse game, incursions  
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12695 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Sep 2012 at 11:54 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-18 12:19:42 PM  

yesanded: These same sources have reported troop movements of Redcoats in the vicinity of Lexington and Concord.

This is what happens when OBAMA refuses to fund the Continental Army.


Well, they're only obligated to follow 60% of his orders anyway.
 
2012-09-18 12:20:31 PM  

Boudica's War Tampon: [www.teachwithmovies.org image 330x475]

Must have been one of the Russky stealth submarines


Thank You
 
2012-09-18 12:20:47 PM  
One ping only, Vasily.
 
2012-09-18 12:21:50 PM  

Boudica's War Tampon: [www.teachwithmovies.org image 330x475]

Must have been one of the Russky stealth submarines


"Emer-gen-see Emer-gen-see. Everybody to get from street."
 
2012-09-18 12:24:20 PM  
Russian Sub sat off the coast of Florida and played "village people - YMCA" 24/7 causing the west coast to panic.
 
2012-09-18 12:24:36 PM  
Five years later.

g-ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2012-09-18 12:24:40 PM  

KyngNothing: So unnamed Navy sources tell some random blogger that we just detected a Russian sub that we didn't detect, combined with a plug to not take away the Navy anti-submarine money, which this concerned blogger manages to spin into an attack on Obama?


Sadly this is a perfect recap of the 'article.'

/I would like to have seen Montana
 
2012-09-18 12:26:07 PM  
Jesus Christ. Even the Russkies know about Panama City.
 
2012-09-18 12:26:23 PM  

angry_scientist: US SIGINT SOSUS knew exactly where all of the single pings came from


FTFY. As an ex-SIGINT weenie, I can tell you that unless a submarine pokes an antenna above the surface and starts transmitting, SIGINT isn't really going to help you find them. The only exception to that would be if you copy orders from their command telling them to go to a specific place, and you can break whatever code and/or cipher system they happen to be using.
 
2012-09-18 12:26:30 PM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Englebert Slaptyback: Russian sub spotted in gulf. Of Mexico.


OMG THEY'RE GONNA INVADE GEORGIA AGAIN!!

LoL :)

Also, I thought when Putin raises his head in the western hemisphere he went to Alaska :/


i48.tinypic.com

Think again...
 
2012-09-18 12:27:37 PM  

CygnusDarius: Five years later.

[g-ecx.images-amazon.com image 800x450]


I can tolerate a lot of his faults, but I will not stand for Obama putting bugs in my video games. Mother farker probably personally made my followers disappear.
 
2012-09-18 12:28:37 PM  
www.tomsoter.com


We will let the Americans listen to their rock and roll while we conduct missile drills...........
 
2012-09-18 12:29:45 PM  
Cold war, cola war?

njnnetwork.com
 
2012-09-18 12:30:09 PM  
Thanks, Romney...
 
2012-09-18 12:32:24 PM  

ltdanman44


We will let the Americans listen to their rock and roll while we conduct missile drills...........


We will passh through the American patrolsh, pasht their shonar netsh, and lay off their largesht city, and lishten to their rock and roll... while we conduct misshile drillsh...
 
2012-09-18 12:32:58 PM  
Time to get the Hitchcock Naval Air Station started again?

/was a base for submarine-detecting blimps
//yeah
 
2012-09-18 12:35:41 PM  
Republican Senator John Cornyn, a member of the Armed Services Committee, has seized the issue and sent a letter to the Pentagon's Chief of Naval Operations demanding clarification,

Oh just shut the fark up already. Partisanship and escalating this gets you nothing except scorn from people who actually know a thing or two about these things, and Texans know farkall about submarines, or the ocean for that matter, except that there is oil under it. They, and we, have been doing this for so long that not only is this not news, but it's like old friends hanging out in the parking lot after the bar has closed and everyone is drinking from the cooler in the back. The only reason this is news is that someone forgot that both countries have been doing this.

The Washington Free Beacon

Oh, that explains all of this. Nobody forgot. Just someone remembered that submarines are in the water and somehow this is Obama's fault.

Putin has it easy. He doesn't have hacks like this ranting about how there are US subs in the Baltic and up by the Northern Fleet in the Arctic.
 
2012-09-18 12:36:13 PM  
Wonder if the crew of the Akula will glow in the dark once their patrol is done...
 
2012-09-18 12:36:52 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: tinfoil-hat maggie: Englebert Slaptyback: Russian sub spotted in gulf. Of Mexico.


OMG THEY'RE GONNA INVADE GEORGIA AGAIN!!

LoL :)

Also, I thought when Putin raises his head in the western hemisphere he went to Alaska :/

[i48.tinypic.com image 800x600]

Think again...


Hahaha, nice :)
 
2012-09-18 12:37:20 PM  
I would like to have seen Montana
 
2012-09-18 12:39:01 PM  
May the hand of God be with you, Paul.

www.wearysloth.com
 
2012-09-18 12:41:33 PM  
How does a sub detected in the Gulf of Mexico suddenly become undetected? The article made my head hurt
 
2012-09-18 12:42:00 PM  
This business will get out of control. It will get out of control, and we will be lucky to live through it.
 
2012-09-18 12:42:14 PM  

Jacobin: How does a sub detected in the Gulf of Mexico suddenly become undetected? The article made my head hurt


Magnets.
 
2012-09-18 12:42:59 PM  
Cold wars over, thank farking god. Growing up in the 70's and 80's is hard to describe to my kids who's only fear is from incompetent Muslim extremist who apparently dont have any nukes. Unlike the commies who I was told daily were about to turn the entire planet into the universes largest glass parking lot. Its over. One of my best friends married a Russian m/o bride, had a kid, divorced and that lil Slavic looking boy is my godson.

I keep expecting ships and subs full of Russians to show up unannounced in all our major ports for weekend leave parties. Its way over due.
 
2012-09-18 12:43:35 PM  

fappomatic: Jesus Christ. Even the Russkies know about Panama City.


So wait, it was here to do us a favor?
 
2012-09-18 12:44:00 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: ltdanman44

We will let the Americans listen to their rock and roll while we conduct missile drills...........


We will passh through the American patrolsh, pasht their shonar netsh, and lay off their largesht city, and lishten to their rock and roll... while we conduct misshile drillsh...


WE demand to know what you are looking for!!! You've dropped enough sonar buoy's in the north Atlantic that a person can walk from Greenland to Iceland to Scotland without getting his feet wet!!!
 
2012-09-18 12:44:11 PM  
Stealing the oil we saved in the bottom!
 
2012-09-18 12:45:04 PM  

orclover: Cold wars over, thank farking god. Growing up in the 70's and 80's is hard to describe to my kids who's only fear is from incompetent Muslim extremist who apparently dont have any nukes. Unlike the commies who I was told daily were about to turn the entire planet into the universes largest glass parking lot. Its over. One of my best friends married a Russian m/o bride, had a kid, divorced and that lil Slavic looking boy is my godson.

I keep expecting ships and subs full of Russians to show up unannounced in all our major ports for weekend leave parties. Its way over due.


Tourism rubles are the best rubles.
 
2012-09-18 12:45:31 PM  

Jacobin: How does a sub detected in the Gulf of Mexico suddenly become undetected? The article made my head hurt


It's an Akula so it's not air dependent and won't surface. That means the only people who could've detected it and known the type are the Navy. Which didn't detect it. Indeed my head hurts. But at least it's Obama's fault.
 
2012-09-18 12:48:06 PM  

MadMattressMack: Jacobin: How does a sub detected in the Gulf of Mexico suddenly become undetected? The article made my head hurt

It's an Akula so it's not air dependent and won't surface. That means the only people who could've detected it and known the type are the Navy. Which didn't detect it. Indeed my head hurts. But at least it's Obama's fault.


Sure, always blame the black guy.
 
2012-09-18 12:48:15 PM  
There are not nearly enough Red October references in this thread.

/seriously
//buckaroo
 
2012-09-18 12:49:04 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: MadMattressMack: Jacobin: How does a sub detected in the Gulf of Mexico suddenly become undetected? The article made my head hurt

It's an Akula so it's not air dependent and won't surface. That means the only people who could've detected it and known the type are the Navy. Which didn't detect it. Indeed my head hurts. But at least it's Obama's fault.

Sure, always blame the black guy.


I wouldn't blame a black Russian, though.
 
2012-09-18 12:53:41 PM  

orclover: Cold wars over, thank farking god. Growing up in the 70's and 80's is hard to describe to my kids who's only fear is from incompetent Muslim extremist who apparently dont have any nukes.


This is what gets me about this "war on terror." We're supposed to be afraid of Ahmed's farking underwear. The CIA press office was tossing around the word "sophisticated" when they were talking about the new models of underwear bombs on the farking Today show.

"Sophisticated" and "underwear bomb" don't even belong in the same farking sentence. Get back to me when Ahmed can launch underwear bombs over the north pole.

Unlike the commies who I was told daily were about to turn the entire planet into the universes largest glass parking lot. Its over.

Indeed.

I keep expecting ships and subs full of Russians to show up unannounced in all our major ports for weekend leave parties. Its way over due

What I would give to drink vodka with some Russian submariners in New Haven.
 
2012-09-18 12:55:08 PM  

98K514: There are not nearly enough Red October references in this thread.

/seriously
//buckaroo


img250.imageshack.us

I wanted to post something relevent, but I am not in a condition to Fark.
 
2012-09-18 12:55:12 PM  
Obama will have to remind Putin he is going to more flexible AFTER the election, not BEFORE.
 
2012-09-18 12:56:56 PM  
Only somewhat related, but when I saw XKCD's graphic comparing ocean depths that included the Typhoon and Ohio-class submarine dive limits, I was surprised at how relatively "shallow" those depths actually are.

Also, I learned today, that the NATO-designated "Akula" class submarine and the Russian-designated "Akula" class submarine are in fact not the same submarine. Fascinating.

And by fascinating I mean needlessly confusing.
 
2012-09-18 12:57:32 PM  

bubo_sibiricus: Putin has it easy. He doesn't have hacks like this ranting about how there are US subs in the Baltic and up by the Northern Fleet in the Arctic


FREE PUSSY RIOT!!!!
 
2012-09-18 12:58:04 PM  

orclover: Cold wars over, thank farking god. Growing up in the 70's and 80's is hard to describe to my kids who's only fear is from incompetent Muslim extremist who apparently dont have any nukes. Unlike the commies who I was told daily were about to turn the entire planet into the universes largest glass parking lot. Its over. One of my best friends married a Russian m/o bride, had a kid, divorced and that lil Slavic looking boy is my godson.

I keep expecting ships and subs full of Russians to show up unannounced in all our major ports for weekend leave parties. Its way over due.


Give Pakistan another 10 years and that might change.
 
2012-09-18 01:02:31 PM  

CygnusDarius: Five years later.


WOW, New Orleans has really cleaned itself up
 
2012-09-18 01:04:17 PM  
Great submarine book, if you're into this kinda stuff.

upload.wikimedia.org

One of the more chilling incidents in the book was, the Americans knew where the Russian "Bastion" was hiding under the Arctic ice cap. So they decided to approach stealthily, and then hammered the idling Russian boomers with active sonar. Damn near caused 'em to launch.
 
2012-09-18 01:10:45 PM  

Jubeebee: Attack submarine, so no nukes, cruising in international waters. We didn't detect it, unless we did and told this one blogger guy.

But it's Russian, so I think I should panic. Can anyone confirm?


The last time I checked, which was 1998, the Akula launched the SS-N-21 which is a long range land attack missile. It had a range of about 1600nm and was thought to have a nuclear warhead capability.

I'm fairly certain that an Akula operating in that area is not unheard of.
 
2012-09-18 01:11:52 PM  

dittybopper: angry_scientist: US SIGINT SOSUS knew exactly where all of the single pings came from

FTFY. As an ex-SIGINT weenie, I can tell you that unless a submarine pokes an antenna above the surface and starts transmitting, SIGINT isn't really going to help you find them. The only exception to that would be if you copy orders from their command telling them to go to a specific place, and you can break whatever code and/or cipher system they happen to be using.


Well, okay. If you say so.
 
2012-09-18 01:19:56 PM  
TFA: especially troubling given the drastic defense cuts sought by President Obama

Republicans are so fscking stupid.

The Russians are effectively a non-threat. Everybody other than you knows this -- including the Russians. Their ability to project any meaningful display of military prowess is severely geographically limited, and any resulting war with the US would be very short, regardless of any reasonable cuts in spending on homeland defense.

What they can do is to keep faking us out the way they did pretty much throughout the Cold War, causing us to steadily increase military spending as we spread our forces thinner and thinner, until a complete economic collapse is inevitable. They know how to do this, because that's what happened to them. We're heading down the same fscking path, and it's all thanks to you.
 
2012-09-18 01:20:01 PM  

andyofne: It had a range of about 1600nm


Phew. We have nothing to worry about. 1600 nanometers is not very far. They should build better missiles.
 
2012-09-18 01:24:19 PM  
They're probably practicing to invade Czechoslovakia and Fartbongo won't do a damn thing about that, because he'll be all like "Czechoslovakia was broken into the Czech Republic and Slovakia in 1994. Which one of them are they attacking?"

Then the next thing you know the God damn Rooskies have the whole Ottoman Empire and they're pushing into Moldavia.
 
2012-09-18 01:24:42 PM  

andyofne: Jubeebee: Attack submarine, so no nukes, cruising in international waters. We didn't detect it, unless we did and told this one blogger guy.

But it's Russian, so I think I should panic. Can anyone confirm?

The last time I checked, which was 1998, the Akula launched the SS-N-21 which is a long range land attack missile. It had a range of about 1600nm and was thought to have a nuclear warhead capability.

I'm fairly certain that an Akula operating in that area is not unheard of.


Akulas were upgraded to fire 12 Granit Submarine launched Cruise missiles, fired from its 533mm Torpedo tubes. Its got around a 3,000km range and can deliver a 200kt warhead. For Anti ship missiles It can fire the SS-N-15 and SS-N-16, whats funny is these anti-ship missiles can be loaded with a 200kt warhead or Type 40 Torpedo.

Akula's have been upgraded time and time again, once used to combat Las Angelas class attack subs, they failed pretty miserable at it, so they were re-designed for land base attacks and anti shipping.
 
2012-09-18 01:25:32 PM  

andyofne: dittybopper: angry_scientist: US SIGINT SOSUS knew exactly where all of the single pings came from

FTFY. As an ex-SIGINT weenie, I can tell you that unless a submarine pokes an antenna above the surface and starts transmitting, SIGINT isn't really going to help you find them. The only exception to that would be if you copy orders from their command telling them to go to a specific place, and you can break whatever code and/or cipher system they happen to be using.

Well, okay. If you say so.


I do believe that SOSUS is being erroneously referred to as SIGINT
 
2012-09-18 01:26:38 PM  

wmoonfox: TFA: especially troubling given the drastic defense cuts sought by President Obama

Republicans are so fscking stupid.

The Russians are effectively a non-threat. Everybody other than you knows this -- including the Russians. Their ability to project any meaningful display of military prowess is severely geographically limited, and any resulting war with the US would be very short, regardless of any reasonable cuts in spending on homeland defense.

What they can do is to keep faking us out the way they did pretty much throughout the Cold War, causing us to steadily increase military spending as we spread our forces thinner and thinner, until a complete economic collapse is inevitable. They know how to do this, because that's what happened to them. We're heading down the same fscking path, and it's all thanks to you.


Which is why we are in an economic war, not a shooting war.
 
2012-09-18 01:27:10 PM  
50 watts per channel, babycakes.
 
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