If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(ESPN)   Winless Saints defense is practically non-existant. If only there were some way the coach could motivate them   (scores.espn.go.com) divider line 84
    More: Interesting, Panthers, Saints, Drew Brees, Jon Beason, Jonathan Stewart, Darren Sproles, Johnny Unitas, DeAngelo Williams  
•       •       •

734 clicks; posted to Sports » on 17 Sep 2012 at 11:14 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



84 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-09-17 09:29:48 AM
Perhaps a good knob gobbling. Nothing motivates me more than a good old-fashioned dick sucking. I'm not suggesting the coaching staff (NTTAWWT) but maybe the Saintsations. I'll bet they could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, after all the Saintsations are INSATIABLE. Or perhaps some skinny crack whores. They're all up and down the cheap hotels on Airline Hwy. I'll bet they could be purchased for less than the price of chicken quarters per pound, and would probably do a fine job... even if they were just pretending to suck the glass dick instead of the 'Who Dat' man glands.

Yes, a good blowjob is in order. A peter puffing party. Perhaps a Zooey Deschanel look-alike contest. After all, I understand she is 'dorkalicious'. A pole smoking, A blumpy blumpkin. Let's clean up the city and clean up the Saint's image with a hoover. Who doesn't love a hummer? Maybe that could hum 'Saints Get Krunked' in order to motivate the 0-2 team. We don't want to return to the "Aint's" days of wearing paper bags over our heads. Down with the paper sacks and up with the nut sacks if you ask me! So move over tubas and bass drums, let's add skin flutes and rusty trombones to that 'Second Line'.

Elect me as the new interim coach. HELL! Elect me president. Two mouths for every cock! I have a jobs program... Blow jobs! Don't get on your knees to pray. Get on your knees to suck my cock.

Fellatio Hornblower
Semen First Class
 
2012-09-17 09:31:48 AM
media.nola.com
 
2012-09-17 09:46:00 AM
Yeah, that defense is looking like a dumpster fire right now. The offense has been spotty and hasn't helped (dropped passes all over the damned place), but come on, guys.
 
2012-09-17 10:59:27 AM

Nabb1: Yeah, that defense is looking like a dumpster fire right now.


Dumpster? Oh man, I wish. Dumpster brand is top of the line.

This is more like a Trashco waste disposal bin fire.
 
2012-09-17 11:20:09 AM
Between the delta between Singletary-Harbaugh and Payton-and Co, I think we have a pretty good idea about how much of elite NFL success can be due to coaching.
 
2012-09-17 11:20:40 AM
Perhaps an incentive program?
 
2012-09-17 11:22:45 AM
That's what happens when the commissioner decides to interfere with your team on exaggerated pretense.
/not a Saints fan.
//still disgusted.
 
2012-09-17 11:26:08 AM
Using the same logic some people tried to twist into a case supporting Peyton Manning for MVP last season, it's become obvious that Sean Payton should be named COY for 2012.
 
2012-09-17 11:28:09 AM
Also non-existent: the word existant.
 
2012-09-17 11:28:43 AM

Harv72b: Using the same logic some people tried to twist into a case supporting Peyton Manning for MVP last season, it's become obvious that Sean Payton should be named COY for 2012.


I dunno, I could support that vote because it would be hilarious and an embarrassment to the commissioner.
 
2012-09-17 11:32:37 AM

IAmRight: I dunno, I could support that vote because it would be hilarious and an embarrassment to the commissioner.


I could totally see cartoon Goodell sitting behind his desk and shaking subtly with hands clenched into fists before crying "Payyyyytoooonnnnnn!"
 
2012-09-17 11:35:12 AM
The saints are gonna be a tough out all year long and they still have some great players. Two games in is too early to worry about not making the playoffs. I mean they all count and this totally sucks if you're a saints fan but the fact remains that if atlanta loses tonight they are only one game and a tiebreaker back. It's not panic time. It is, however, definitely pre-panic time. Mostly because of that 75 points given up thing. That's a lot of points.
 
2012-09-17 11:35:43 AM
The sad part is that the defensive coaching was quite well done. We were getting pressure on Cam, touches in the backfield, and often had good coverage on receivers. Many times their runs would just get stuffed and their passing game revolved around perfectly thrown passes and great catches. But they would spin and double-option and Smith would grab amazing throws, and there was really nothing we could do.

That isn't to say that our defense didn't screw the pooch; there were plenty of lapses and they seemed to have our number. But I'll be damned if Spagnuolo's gonna get a bad rap for this.

and for FARK'S SAKE STOP DROPPING TOUCHDOWN PASSES
 
2012-09-17 11:38:24 AM

Sargun: The sad part is that the defensive coaching was quite well done. We were getting pressure on Cam, touches in the backfield, and often had good coverage on receivers. Many times their runs would just get stuffed and their passing game revolved around perfectly thrown passes and great catches. But they would spin and double-option and Smith would grab amazing throws, and there was really nothing we could do.

That isn't to say that our defense didn't screw the pooch; there were plenty of lapses and they seemed to have our number. But I'll be damned if Spagnuolo's gonna get a bad rap for this.

and for FARK'S SAKE STOP DROPPING TOUCHDOWN PASSES


Haven't been watching closely, has JIMMAH Graham stopped being the greatest athlete EVAR yet? In the NFL back to a one-Gronkowski show?
 
2012-09-17 11:41:35 AM
Are the Saints that bad or are the Redskins and Panthers that good?
 
2012-09-17 11:46:46 AM

SlothB77: Redskins


Well they lost to the Rams if that answers the question.
 
2012-09-17 11:48:05 AM
Saints 0-2

Raiders 0-2


This is gonna be a long looooooong season.
 
2012-09-17 11:48:51 AM

SlothB77: Are the Saints that bad or are the Redskins and Panthers that good?


Well the Redskins lost to the Rams, and the Panthers only scored 10 points against a Bucs defense that gave up 41 yesterday, so I'd say the Saints defense is exactly as bad as their first two games would indicate.
 
2012-09-17 11:49:51 AM
Still though

Geaux!

They might still win a game this year
 
2012-09-17 11:55:41 AM

SlothB77: Are the Saints that bad or are the Redskins and Panthers that good?


Haha. You serious? Let me laugh harder...HAHA.

The Saints will be fine. The defense sucks, guess they aren't as motivated to play as they were in years past for some reason. But Breesus won't throw pick 6s on the 9 yard line every game and their receivers are too good continue dropping so many balls. And frankly defense is no longer required to be successful, so on the strength of Breesus and the adoration of his Fark congregation, they'll compete for the division.

I'm sure they told upcoming referees for their games to take down their Saints' fan photos from Facebook, so theyll have that going for them too.

/don't forget about the upcoming resuspensions, the media circus around that will really let them play the victim card for the rest of the season
//if they gag this week against KC, then maybe start worrying
 
2012-09-17 11:56:33 AM

SlothB77: Are the Saints that bad or are the Redskins and Panthers that good?


I think the Saints defense is just... just... Oh, god, I need a paper bag.
 
2012-09-17 12:03:17 PM

gilgigamesh: Nabb1: Yeah, that defense is looking like a dumpster fire right now.

Dumpster? Oh man, I wish. Dumpster brand is top of the line.

This is more like a Trashco waste disposal bin fire.


I have to take that back. I know a dumpster fire is a thing. I have seen a dumpster fire. See, here's one:

i2.photobucket.com

But I have not seen any Saints defense thus far. I cannot vouch for its existence. I mean, I see that when the other team is on offense, we send eleven men out on the field wearing what appears to be Saints uniforms. They seem to move about in a defense-like manner. And yet, nothing happens. Except scoring. Lots and lots of scoring. So, unlike a dumpster fire, I can't really conclude that the Saints' defense really exists.
 
2012-09-17 12:10:29 PM

mikaloyd: Saints 0-2

Raiders 0-2


This is gonna be a long looooooong season.


could be worse, you could be a titans fan

/depressed
 
2012-09-17 12:11:00 PM
They'll right the ship next week against the Chiefs. As bad as that defense is, the Chiefs are incapable of scoring enough points to keep up with their offense
 
2012-09-17 12:11:58 PM
I know this is a saints thread but did anyone else notice in the browns loss that the qb everyone made fun of them for taking was 26/37 for 322 yards, an 8.7 avg, 2 TD's, no picks, and a 114 qb rating? I'm sure he'll crash and burn eventually but I haven't seen many pundits giving the guy his props. Not bad for the rookie in his second game against a decent team on the road.

Has a browns qb had a better statistical game in the last 5 years?
 
2012-09-17 12:13:44 PM

JohnBigBootay: I know this is a saints thread but did anyone else notice in the browns loss that the qb everyone made fun of them for taking was 26/37 for 322 yards, an 8.7 avg, 2 TD's, no picks, and a 114 qb rating? I'm sure he'll crash and burn eventually but I haven't seen many pundits giving the guy his props. Not bad for the rookie in his second game against a decent team on the road.

Has a browns qb had a better statistical game in the last 5 years?


Might be due to his 5.4 passer rating in the previous game, and the fact that he racked up all his yards in garbage time of a blowout
 
2012-09-17 12:15:38 PM
Was the Saints defense good last year? (24th in the league)
Why is this news?
 
2012-09-17 12:17:06 PM

JohnBigBootay: I know this is a saints thread but did anyone else notice in the browns loss that the qb everyone made fun of them for taking was 26/37 for 322 yards, an 8.7 avg, 2 TD's, no picks, and a 114 qb rating? I'm sure he'll crash and burn eventually but I haven't seen many pundits giving the guy his props. Not bad for the rookie in his second game against a decent team on the road.

Has a browns qb had a better statistical game in the last 5 years?


Nothing about the Bengals defense is "decent" - they gave up 44 points and 430 yards to the Ravens last week.

Not to say it wasn't a good game by Weeden, but the Bengals don't seem too interested in stopping anybody.
 
2012-09-17 12:17:49 PM

JohnBigBootay: I know this is a saints thread but did anyone else notice in the browns loss that the qb everyone made fun of them for taking was 26/37 for 322 yards, an 8.7 avg, 2 TD's, no picks, and a 114 qb rating? I'm sure he'll crash and burn eventually but I haven't seen many pundits giving the guy his props. Not bad for the rookie in his second game against a decent team on the road.

Has a browns qb had a better statistical game in the last 5 years?


Garbage time and you have to consider that Joe Flacco also f*cked the Bengals up. Might be time to consider that the Bengals were lucky last year and aren't all that good.
 
2012-09-17 12:20:39 PM

Lost Thought 00: Might be due to his 5.4 passer rating in the previous game, and the fact that he racked up all his yards in garbage time of a blowout


didn't know that. I mean I knew the first thing but I didn't know the second. Didn't have the game. Still - I don't recall a browns qb with those kinds of numbers in recent years.

And how the hell was that a blowout in any way? 7-3 after one. 17-10 after two. 24-17 after three. 34-27 final. Perhaps you are misremembering something - that's not a blowout.
 
2012-09-17 12:24:10 PM

IAmRight: Garbage time and you have to consider that Joe Flacco also f*cked the Bengals up. Might be time to consider that the Bengals were lucky last year and aren't all that good.


I'll stipulate the the bengals have given up a bunch of points. That seems evident. But I still disagree with garbage time. His second TD to bring them within one score came at the 7:11 mark of the 4th quarter. If the bengals think that's garbage time they have bigger problems than their defense.
 
2012-09-17 12:25:16 PM

Dahnkster: Perhaps a good knob gobbling. Nothing motivates me more than a good old-fashioned dick sucking. I'm not suggesting the coaching staff (NTTAWWT) but maybe the Saintsations. I'll bet they could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, after all the Saintsations are INSATIABLE. Or perhaps some skinny crack whores. They're all up and down the cheap hotels on Airline Hwy. I'll bet they could be purchased for less than the price of chicken quarters per pound, and would probably do a fine job... even if they were just pretending to suck the glass dick instead of the 'Who Dat' man glands.

Yes, a good blowjob is in order. A peter puffing party. Perhaps a Zooey Deschanel look-alike contest. After all, I understand she is 'dorkalicious'. A pole smoking, A blumpy blumpkin. Let's clean up the city and clean up the Saint's image with a hoover. Who doesn't love a hummer? Maybe that could hum 'Saints Get Krunked' in order to motivate the 0-2 team. We don't want to return to the "Aint's" days of wearing paper bags over our heads. Down with the paper sacks and up with the nut sacks if you ask me! So move over tubas and bass drums, let's add skin flutes and rusty trombones to that 'Second Line'.

Elect me as the new interim coach. HELL! Elect me president. Two mouths for every cock! I have a jobs program... Blow jobs! Don't get on your knees to pray. Get on your knees to suck my cock.

Fellatio Hornblower
Semen First Class



You sound polish
sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2012-09-17 12:25:56 PM

Yanks_RSJ: Not to say it wasn't a good game by Weeden, but the Bengals don't seem too interested in stopping anybody.


I hope they don't want to stop anyone. the steelers are on thin ice already.

Anyway, I just wanted to give the guy his props. I do not have many opportunities to relinquish the props to a Browns qb and I did not want to miss the opportunity.
 
2012-09-17 12:25:58 PM
Meh, I'm not worried about the Saints defense.  Their offense is way too spotty.  One great drive, then one mistake-filled drive.  Repeat ad nauseum.
 
2012-09-17 12:27:17 PM

JohnBigBootay: His second TD to bring them within one score came at the 7:11 mark of the 4th quarter. If the bengals think that's garbage time they have bigger problems than their defense.


Teams tend to let up in the 4th quarter up two possessions. Why do you think Tony Romo is the best QB in the NFL in the fourth quarter, stats-wise? =D

/most don't go full Tampa Bay and let up until the other team is ahead a TD
 
2012-09-17 12:29:52 PM

JohnBigBootay: Lost Thought 00: Might be due to his 5.4 passer rating in the previous game, and the fact that he racked up all his yards in garbage time of a blowout

didn't know that. I mean I knew the first thing but I didn't know the second. Didn't have the game. Still - I don't recall a browns qb with those kinds of numbers in recent years.

And how the hell was that a blowout in any way? 7-3 after one. 17-10 after two. 24-17 after three. 34-27 final. Perhaps you are misremembering something - that's not a blowout.


Weinke had a good game, no doubt. And though the scores at the quarters didn't reflect it the Browns were down by more than 10 on a couple of occasions (not that 10 is a blowout but the Bengals seemed in control) I think so it seemed the Bengals went full prevent and let him march up and down the field.

In any case Brandon Weinke had a good game for sure but no one is talking about it because he was awful last week. One awful game and one good game to go 0-2 doesn't attract much attention. Griffin and Luck have both been much better in both games than Weeden and their teams are better and more interesting.
 
2012-09-17 12:38:32 PM

JohnBigBootay: didn't know that. I mean I knew the first thing but I didn't know the second. Didn't have the game. Still - I don't recall a browns qb with those kinds of numbers in recent years.


exactly 5 years ago, Derek Anderson:
VS. BAL 34 56 478 yrds 2 TD 2 INT

He and Braylen had an awesome year.
 
2012-09-17 12:38:35 PM

js34603: Griffin and Luck have both been much better in both games than Weeden and their teams are better and more interesting.


You forgot Tannehill and Wilson.

So Weeden had a nice day and he's the only rookie QB that doesn't have a win yet (though he damn near had one in Week 1 with the worst game anyone's played this year).
 
2012-09-17 12:38:39 PM

IAmRight: Teams tend to let up in the 4th quarter up two possessions.


Sure. Fair enough. But let me just point out that garbage time (and that really was NOT garbage time yesterday) is something Cleveland QB's have had an almost weekly exposure to the last few years and I still don't recall their qb often putting up numbers like that. That's really all I'm saying. he'll probably suck again next week.
 
2012-09-17 12:40:18 PM

thecpt: exactly 5 years ago, Derek Anderson:


Heh. I actually remembering when i thought he was gonna be good.

js34603: In any case Brandon Weinke had a good game for sure


That's funny. But we're talking about the other really old rookie qb. Unless that was a joke, in which case I get it I think.
 
2012-09-17 12:42:14 PM

JohnBigBootay: Sure. Fair enough. But let me just point out that garbage time (and that really was NOT garbage time yesterday) is something Cleveland QB's have had an almost weekly exposure to the last few years and I still don't recall their qb often putting up numbers like that.


Well, "better than other Cleveland QBs" still doesn't quite approach "competent."
 
2012-09-17 12:42:36 PM
Saints have invested a lot of picks in the defense, but have drafted poorly, spending high picks on guys that have turned out to be only okay players. The defensive production will probably approach last year's as the season goes on and players adjust to Spags' particular scheme, but overall the unit severely lacks talent.

At least they cleaned up the penalty problem from last week. That's something, right? :\


JohnBigBootay: I know this is a saints thread but did anyone else notice in the browns loss that the qb everyone made fun of them for taking was 26/37 for 322 yards, an 8.7 avg, 2 TD's, no picks, and a 114 qb rating? I'm sure he'll crash and burn eventually but I haven't seen many pundits giving the guy his props. Not bad for the rookie in his second game against a decent team on the road.

Has a browns qb had a better statistical game in the last 5 years?


Derek Anderson had a couple of comparable statistical outliers in that stretch. His 5 td game against Cincy in '07, and the monday nighter in '08 when the Browns beat the Giants. However, since this is still the Browns, proprietors of the Sadness Factory, Weedon will probably turn out to be the next Derek Anderson.
 
2012-09-17 12:43:04 PM

IAmRight: Teams tend to let up in the 4th quarter up two possessions. Why do you think Tony Romo is the best QB in the NFL in the fourth quarter, stats-wise? =D


Ouch.

Unfortunately true though.

/Holy shiat was he bad yesterday.
 
2012-09-17 12:43:58 PM
Not terribly relevant, but apparently Brandon Weeden has more rushing yards than Chris Johnson so far.
 
2012-09-17 12:51:29 PM

SirLothar: /Holy shiat was he bad yesterday.


Eh, his receivers sure didn't help him out. Also, Seattle's defense is good/great.
 
2012-09-17 12:55:16 PM

SirLothar: IAmRight: Teams tend to let up in the 4th quarter up two possessions. Why do you think Tony Romo is the best QB in the NFL in the fourth quarter, stats-wise? =D

Ouch.

Unfortunately true though.

/Holy shiat was he bad yesterday.


Those little alligator arms make it hard to catch and hold on to footballs. That's not Romo's fault.

/Just say'in
 
2012-09-17 12:56:22 PM

thecpt: exactly 5 years ago, Derek Anderson:
VS. BAL 34 56 478 yrds 2 TD 2 INT


When you have to go back 5 years to find a guy who posted numbers comparable to 322 yards with 2 TDs, it doesn't really disprove the point. ;)
 
2012-09-17 01:02:39 PM

Tickle Mittens: That's not Romo's fault.


No, but throwing the ball several times to a location on the field where not a single Cowboy was in the vicinity of, is most definitely his fault.

/It's difficult being a Dallas fan these days
 
2012-09-17 01:07:30 PM

Harv72b: thecpt: exactly 5 years ago, Derek Anderson:
VS. BAL 34 56 478 yrds 2 TD 2 INT

When you have to go back 5 years to find a guy who posted numbers comparable to 322 yards with 2 TDs, it doesn't really disprove the point. ;)


It wasn't for proving anyone wrong. He posed the question, and I faintly remembered DA's great year and thought it was interesting for comparison. I'm not one of those Farkers. I still don't like that McCoy wasn't given more of a shot.
 
2012-09-17 01:11:43 PM

thecpt: I still don't like that McCoy wasn't given more of a shot.


Does that mean because they benched him, or because they didn't release or trade him?

/I'm sorry, too easy, etc. :)
 
Displayed 50 of 84 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report