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(Some Guy)   Microsoft patents smacking your phone to make it shut up. Subby is sure he saw prior art for this in the toy section at Wal-Mart yesterday   (patentbolt.com) divider line 28
    More: Obvious, Microsoft, patent applications, Wal-Mart  
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1440 clicks; posted to Business » on 16 Sep 2012 at 10:42 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-16 08:22:33 AM
Well it's not stupider than patenting rounded corners.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-09-16 09:07:32 AM
I'm undecided between abolishing tech patents and charging a huge annual maintenance fee.
 
2012-09-16 09:10:54 AM
"Microsoft Patent: How to Silence your Device by whacking it off"

I've been doing this since I was a teenager, didn't know I could patent it.
 
2012-09-16 10:48:35 AM
"Microsoft Patent: How to Silence your Device by whacking it off"

it shuts me up
 
2012-09-16 10:53:51 AM
How is this different from my android phone sensing that I have picked it up or moved it, and silencing the ring because it's on the way to my face?
 
2012-09-16 11:24:37 AM

ZAZ: I'm undecided between abolishing tech patents and charging a huge annual maintenance fee.


There already are huge maintenance fees (though they aren't annual), and they increase over time. As a result, only around 50% of patents actually survive for their full term:
www.patentlyo.com
 
2012-09-16 11:25:19 AM
Also, not your fault Subby, since the article screwed it up too, but this is just a patent application, not an issued patent.
 
2012-09-16 12:15:26 PM

Spanky_McFarksalot: "Microsoft Patent: How to Silence your Device by whacking it off"

it shuts me up


But not before a groan of relief followed by mumbling how I just wasted an hour or 3 online.
 
2012-09-16 12:22:01 PM

MoronLessOff: Spanky_McFarksalot: "Microsoft Patent: How to Silence your Device by whacking it off"

it shuts me up

But not before a groan of relief followed by mumbling how I just wasted an hour or 3 online.


Followed later by that mortified feeling when you realize you forgot to clear your browser history.
 
2012-09-16 12:26:40 PM

MusicMakeMyHeadPound: MoronLessOff: Spanky_McFarksalot: "Microsoft Patent: How to Silence your Device by whacking it off"

it shuts me up

But not before a groan of relief followed by mumbling how I just wasted an hour or 3 online.

Followed later by that mortified feeling when you realize you forgot to clear your browser history.


Back in the day, there was the occasional worry if I left the tape in the VCR as I headed to work. Oh well, too late to turn around. I guess I'll deal with it when I get home.

Incognito is amazing.
 
2012-09-16 12:28:09 PM
If they get this approved, then my neighbor's husband should sue them.
 
2012-09-16 12:56:21 PM

RedPhoenix122: "Microsoft Patent: How to Silence your Device by whacking it off"

I've been doing this since I was a teenager, didn't know I could patent it.


You're lucky it's a Microsoft patent and not Apple. You could be doing hard time.

/hard time
 
2012-09-16 01:02:43 PM
Al Calavicci unimpressed.
 
2012-09-16 01:22:25 PM
People have been doing this to their alarm clocks for decades.
 
2012-09-16 01:25:09 PM

BizarreMan: How is this different from my android phone sensing that I have picked it up or moved it, and silencing the ring because it's on the way to my face?


You have to whack it in your face. Or against it. Either way is good...
 
2012-09-16 01:27:19 PM
I can't wait till Apple claims to have invented corporal punishment.
 
2012-09-16 02:33:43 PM

limeyfellow: People have been doing this to their alarm clocks for decades.


This. Prior art.
 
2012-09-16 03:27:32 PM
www.millionaireplayboy.com
 
2012-09-16 03:33:30 PM
So I have to whack my phone off?

I can't fap to this.
 
2012-09-16 04:21:36 PM
I don't have a problem with this, but this might herald a poor start to our relationship with AI if we get used to hitting them to make them shut up. Also, I'm sure some people out there, and I'm thinking here chiefly of chavs and Floridians, will be similarly unable to distinguish between doing this to their child and doing it to their phone as well...

\maybe, like, 1/3 serious
 
2012-09-16 04:30:18 PM
That's actually cool, I'd like to have that feature.
 
2012-09-16 04:55:43 PM

sure haven't: That's actually cool, I'd like to have that feature.


Yeah. That would be wonderful for when I forget to put my phone on silent at work.
 
2012-09-16 05:02:07 PM
I'm going to patent not paying my bills and call it even.
 
2012-09-16 07:45:11 PM

skodabunny: I don't have a problem with this, but this might herald a poor start to our relationship with AI if we get used to hitting them to make them shut up.


www.thelmagazine.com
 
2012-09-16 10:08:48 PM

twat_waffle: sure haven't: That's actually cool, I'd like to have that feature.

Yeah. That would be wonderful for when I forget to put my phone on silent at work.


My last windows phone had this feature. Right before I had to replace it.
 
2012-09-16 10:34:26 PM

Theaetetus: skodabunny: I don't have a problem with this, but this might herald a poor start to our relationship with AI if we get used to hitting them to make them shut up.

[www.thelmagazine.com image 500x334]


One replicant raping another replicant isn't really relevant to that point...
 
2012-09-16 10:42:42 PM

Demetrius: So I have to whack my phone off?

I can't fap to this.


Heh. Phone sex.
 
2012-09-17 02:02:10 PM
What does it do as it's sailing through the air?
 
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