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(Esquire)   New poll shows 58% think Obama could take Romney in a fistfight   (esquire.com) divider line 133
    More: Cool, President Obama, political conventions, ancient Greeks  
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1961 clicks; posted to Politics » on 15 Sep 2012 at 9:14 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



133 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-15 12:58:52 AM  
We get it, he's black.
 
2012-09-15 12:59:54 AM  
Vince McMahon would book that for Wrestlemania in a heartbeat.
 
2012-09-15 01:01:11 AM  
Obama could definitely whip Mitt's as at thumb wrestling
 
2012-09-15 01:02:07 AM  
huh... my s fell off
 
2012-09-15 01:03:23 AM  
I miss Celebrity Deathmatch.
 
2012-09-15 01:11:44 AM  

bdub77: We get it, he's black.

 
2012-09-15 01:13:45 AM  
I'd bet good money Romney has never once been punched square in the face.

/ Not for a lack of volunteers, mind you.
 
2012-09-15 03:22:20 AM  
Sure Obama could take Mitt out in a fistfight. I daresay with one punch.

He goes out now n then to play some basketball [there's a fair number of courts in Federal buildings in DC] and tells the guys not to go easy on him, in spite of him not being 20 or 30 any longer. He just spins up a little slower, that's all.

But once he's spun up he holds his own for a good while even with guys who have a hundred pounds of muscle up on him.

He got ran into by another guy during one game and got himself sixteen stitches.

Do ya think Poor Little Rich Willard could handle that sh*t?
Do ya think he has ever even set foot on a basketball court?

Obama's got good reflexes too. He ninja'd the crap out of a fly during a televised interview.

Ya think Willard could do that? Hah.

But you know what else? I don't think Obama would even need to use his fists. He might just pull a Kirk vs. Nomad trick and dear old Willard would self destruct in a greasy puff of self contradiction.
 
2012-09-15 08:40:50 AM  

vartian: I'd bet good money Romney has never once been punched square in the face.

/ Not for a lack of volunteers, mind you.


That's probably his greatest accomplishment because that smirking mug might as well have a target painted on it.
 
2012-09-15 08:47:19 AM  
To be fair, my three year old daughter could probably take Mitt in a fistfight.

/toddlers fight dirty
 
2012-09-15 09:17:02 AM  
Fist. Face. Ouch.
 
2012-09-15 09:19:00 AM  
DNRTFA

They're talking about Mrs. Obama, right? 'Cause I'm pretty sure she could dust the old feller off pretty quick.
 
2012-09-15 09:21:47 AM  
Pocket Ninja covered this one yesterday.
 
2012-09-15 09:22:52 AM  
Putin could whoop Obama, Romney, Ryan, Biden, and a few secret serviceman in a staged fight.
 
2012-09-15 09:23:29 AM  
That's hardly a fair fight. As a Master Jedi, Obama has a lightsaber.

And I'm pretty sure Mitt's programming won't allow him to cause physical harm to a human being. You have to assume the programmers included some variant of Asimov's laws when designing him.
 
2012-09-15 09:24:21 AM  
Obama's 10 years younger and in good physical condition. Romney walks with a slight limp, too
 
2012-09-15 09:26:06 AM  

skepticultist: And I'm pretty sure Mitt's programming won't allow him to cause physical harm to a human being. You have to assume the programmers included some variant of Asimov's laws when designing him.


That's going to be tricky when he goes to invade every country in the ME that isn't Saudi or Israel.
 
2012-09-15 09:27:50 AM  
Sorry, Obama is 14 years younger
 
2012-09-15 09:29:51 AM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: To be fair, my three year old daughter could probably take Mitt in a fistfight.

/toddlers fight dirty


Will this fight be on pay-per-view? Or will I have to find an online stream of it?
 
2012-09-15 09:30:16 AM  
If it was a fair fist fight and the participants restricted themselves to just fighting with their fists and things like no punching in the nuts, then Obama would probably win.

In reality Romney would do something like pull out a taser and then argue that he had to tase Obama first because Obama probably had a taser too or was going to fight dirty some other way.

I.e. Republican projection as an excuse for breaking the rules.
 
2012-09-15 09:30:22 AM  

Chabash: Pocket Ninja covered this one yesterday.


Reddit talked about it very early this week.
 
2012-09-15 09:30:30 AM  
Terri Schiavo could take Romney in a fistfight.
 
2012-09-15 09:30:39 AM  
cdn.theatlantic.com

Hey look, somebody at Esquire saw last month's Atlantic Monthly cover.
 
2012-09-15 09:31:24 AM  

bdub77: We get it, he's black.


*snort*
 
2012-09-15 09:31:47 AM  
I'd like to see Obama in a fistfight with Chuck Norris.
 
2012-09-15 09:32:04 AM  

Hetfield: Terri Schiavo could take Romney in a fistfight.


Snap, Oh, one each.

/Well played.
 
2012-09-15 09:32:38 AM  
Obama would just walk up to Mitt and give him the fake move like he was going to hit him and Mitt would piss his pants then Mitt would go on TV, smirk and say how bad he kicked Obama's ass and Ryan would be standing behind him going "yeah".
 
2012-09-15 09:32:43 AM  
l3.yimg.com
 
2012-09-15 09:32:53 AM  
It'd be so funny if they were squaring off to fight and Obama up and gives him a Moe-poke right in the eyes.
 
2012-09-15 09:35:28 AM  
I'd like to see Biden headbutt Ryan.
 
2012-09-15 09:37:08 AM  

shotglasss: I'd like to see Obama in a fistfight with Chuck Norris.


72 year-olds, dude.

www.examiner.com
 
2012-09-15 09:41:10 AM  
Romney could afford to hire a bunch of guys from blackwater to beat up obama
 
2012-09-15 09:44:36 AM  
Romney would pay a poor kid to fight for him. If Obama fought the kid-"See, this is what your president thinks of you". If he refused-"not a job creator". It's a win/win
 
2012-09-15 09:45:41 AM  
Romney would lose, but would later claim to have won. In addition, he would offer critique on how Obama did everything wrong while beating him silly.
 
2012-09-15 09:48:30 AM  

shotglasss: I'd like to see Obama in a fistfight with Chuck Norris.


Seriously though, which Obama are you talking about? Chuck Norris is 72. Barack, Michelle and Malia could all easily kick Chuck's ass. Sasha would be around even money.
 
2012-09-15 09:49:31 AM  
Romney may not be able to take Obama, but he would absolutely destroy the chair. So vote Republican.
 
2012-09-15 09:49:56 AM  
HAY GUIZE!!! AREN"T PEOPLE WHO DUNT VOTE 4 OBAMA STOOPID!!
 
2012-09-15 09:50:30 AM  
Nah, Mitt's butler is tougher than he looks.
 
2012-09-15 09:50:41 AM  

bdub77: We get it, he's black.


Which means once Romney started winning, Obama's friends will jump in

/lived in a black neighborhood, don't even try to deny it
 
2012-09-15 09:54:00 AM  

skepticultist: That's hardly a fair fight. As a Master Jedi, Obama has a lightsaber.

And I'm pretty sure Mitt's programming won't allow him to cause physical harm to a human being. You have to assume the programmers included some variant of Asimov's laws when designing him.


I was thinking Obama using a Vulcan neck pinch. But, hey, lightsabers are good.

/it's fun to have a geek president
 
2012-09-15 09:54:09 AM  
Romney would hire someone to fight for him, as to not mess up the smirk.
 
2012-09-15 09:59:52 AM  
According to Romney, fighting is what poor people do when they can't afford a lawyer to just sue.
 
2012-09-15 10:01:47 AM  
The winner of most presidential elections is the one that woud win in a fistfight.
 
2012-09-15 10:03:01 AM  
i.telegraph.co.uk

Meanwhile, Putin is ripping hearts out.
 
2012-09-15 10:03:03 AM  

MrPenny: They're talking about Mrs. Obama, right? 'Cause I'm pretty sure she could dust the old feller off pretty quick.


Fnarr fnarr.
 
2012-09-15 10:03:58 AM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: To be fair, my three year old daughter could probably take Mitt in a fistfight.

/toddlers fight dirty


This.

My little toddler sunk her claws into my ear and drove me from my knees to the ground and then stomped my head into the floor.
I pity the kid at daycare that messes with her.
 
2012-09-15 10:04:46 AM  

bdub77: We get it, he's black.


this may be the most appropriate time, ever, for this.
 
2012-09-15 10:05:01 AM  
Romney would cheat like an 80s movie villain.
 
2012-09-15 10:06:51 AM  
It's clear that something is going on with the GOP. What is up with all these bad moves?

I suspect...

Obama is going to win because the GOP want to lose.

Remember that old Onion joke, 'black man given worst job in US'?.

Not far from the truth. The US needs a lot of work, the GOP know this, so they want to stay out of the drivers seat and just blame and complain.

But they have honestly no backbone to try and do it themselves.
 
2012-09-15 10:06:52 AM  
Republicans need to take the next month and a half and stretch out their buttholes for what is to come in November. lol
 
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