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(Athens Banner Herald)   Man dines and dashes at Waffle House. Runs across major roadway. Ends up scattered, smothered and covered...maybe chunked   (onlineathens.com) divider line 45
    More: Dumbass, Waffle House, dine and dash  
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4309 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Sep 2012 at 3:55 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-15 12:11:07 AM  
Some men would die for their country. Some are so hardcore they'd die for a cause. Some have died for god, some for love.

But this dude died for a Waffle House meal.

The ultimate in hardcore.

His mom must be bursting with pride.
 
2012-09-15 12:19:01 AM  

unlikely: The ultimate in hardcore.

His mom must be bursting with pride.


Greater redneckisity has no one than this: that he lay down his life for substandard hashbrowns.
 
2012-09-15 12:39:10 AM  

Chariset: unlikely: The ultimate in hardcore.

His mom must be bursting with pride.

Greater redneckisity has no one than this: that he lay down his life for substandard hashbrowns.


Okay.... where the hell is the funny button when I need it?

/damn, lady... I'm never gonna get all this beer off my screen
 
2012-09-15 12:43:50 AM  

Chariset: Greater redneckisity has no one than this: that he lay down his life for substandard hashbrowns.


Dulce et decorum est pro cheap t-bone mori.
 
2012-09-15 01:08:05 AM  
I know we have to get in line behind Arizona, Texas and Kansas.. but ever so surely we're creeping closer to justifying a Georgia tag
 
2012-09-15 01:58:26 AM  
Whoop whoop!
 
2012-09-15 02:03:21 AM  
Hilarious!
 
2012-09-15 03:07:47 AM  
How do we know he didn't intentionally run into traffic? That'd be my response upon realizing I had just sat down to a meal at Waffle House...


unlikely: Chariset: Greater redneckisity has no one than this: that he lay down his life for substandard hashbrowns.

Dulce et decorum est pro cheap t-bone mori.


+10 internets to you, I laughed so hard.
 
2012-09-15 03:58:25 AM  
theres a racist joke in here somewhere....
 
2012-09-15 04:00:36 AM  
Well, at least he didn't murder somebody to get a death row last meal. I'll give him that
 
2012-09-15 04:02:31 AM  

unlikely: His mom must be bursting with pride.


His mom may not be bursting with pride, but I'd bet that he's bursting from blunt force trauma.
 
2012-09-15 04:02:44 AM  

The Bestest: I know we have to get in line behind Arizona, Texas and Kansas.. but ever so surely we're creeping closer to justifying a Georgia tag


one of those names is supposed to be Ohio, I think....

/Ohioan
//headed to SC this weekend to see what actual southern rednecks are like
///slashies come in threes
 
2012-09-15 04:04:33 AM  
I'll tip subby a full 20% for that headline.
 
2012-09-15 04:05:11 AM  
This is one case where the restaurant should have given the customer a tip...

...look both ways before you cross the road.
 
2012-09-15 04:23:54 AM  
You're poor and hungry and so desperate you stole a meal from a diner. Then died while running away!

Ha ha. Jeeves, fetch me my monocle polish. And not the domestic stuff, I fired my last valet for that.

Oh, how he cried about how it meant he'd lose his health insurance, and his wife had cancer.

Watching the poor struggle in desperation is ever so fun. Even the serfs find it entertaining.

Well, until its someone they know.

Now be a good manservant and fetch me my hunting rifle. We've stocked the preserve with sime very athletic homeless.

Tally ho!
 
2012-09-15 04:33:47 AM  
glad subby said chunked not chinked

/proud supporter of the hooter's legal team
 
2012-09-15 04:45:58 AM  
awful house? more like awesome house!

/for breakfast every morning driving cross country thru the south
 
2012-09-15 05:44:23 AM  
What I wouldn't give for a Waffle House in this forsaken town.

if I had the money, I'd franchise one here in Yuma, Arizona.

I'd also franchise a Whataburger if I could.

One time on vacation in the Deep South, I came across a street that had a Whataburrger, Waffle House and a Krystal within a mile of each other. i just about jizzed myself. I totally ate at all of them.
 
2012-09-15 05:45:01 AM  

MisterRonbo: You're poor and hungry and so desperate you stole a meal from a diner. Then died while running away!

Ha ha. Jeeves, fetch me my monocle polish. And not the domestic stuff, I fired my last valet for that.


Perhaps you haven't had a look at the underclass of the American Southeast, but "hungry" is not often among the words one would use to describe them. Better have Jeeves fetch your harpoon gun than your hunting gun, Lord Portnoy.
 
2012-09-15 07:50:26 AM  
Isn't "Felony Murder" a charge you get when you commit a crime and someone dies during the commission of the crime?

I wonder if his friends are about to face a really serious charge...
 
2012-09-15 07:53:53 AM  
Years ago I went to a Waffle House in Maryland and one of the kids working there cut his finger and continued to hold his bleeding finger over the food. He even showed his bloody finger to everyone. They didn't replace the food. I never went back to Waffle House again.

/csb
 
2012-09-15 08:22:49 AM  
I wonder what he would have looked like if "Darlene" (all 250lb of tattooed muscle) had got a hold of him for skipping?
 
2012-09-15 08:53:04 AM  

ShannonKW: MisterRonbo: You're poor and hungry and so desperate you stole a meal from a diner. Then died while running away!

Ha ha. Jeeves, fetch me my monocle polish. And not the domestic stuff, I fired my last valet for that.

Perhaps you haven't had a look at the underclass of the American Southeast, but "hungry" is not often among the words one would use to describe them. Better have Jeeves fetch your harpoon gun than your hunting gun, Lord Portnoy.


Pretty much this. The notion that people who steal free sit-down meals are 'hungry' and/or 'starving' is pretty ridiculous. Around here they call it 'pulling a runner' and the people doing it are just lazy/scummy. In this story - four friends did it - probably tweeting it on their smart phones - then ran to where they stashed their car.

I'm not GLAD the guy died - but I'm sure not sorry either. I feel bad for the wait-staff they stiffed and driver who hit the retard.
 
2012-09-15 08:57:53 AM  
Am I the only one that thinks this would make a great scene in a dark comedy.

Especially the awkward silence as the dead kid's friends ride home...

disquietblog.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-15 09:37:06 AM  
CSB time:

A number of years ago, I was dining in an restaurant with outdoor seating with my wife. Our waiter was a good friend of ours. As we were seated, my friend nodded to the table behind us where two very inebriated guys were sitting. He let me know they already had a $75 tab and were beginning to act a bit hinky and that I should keep an eye on them. I adjusted my chair to allow for a quick exit and waited.

We placed our order and my friend went inside to take care of it. No sooner than he cleared the door, the morons behind us bolted, one toward the street and the other toward the tire store next door. I chose to follow the tire store guy. He got to the edge of the property and turned around to see if he had gotten away with it. I was dressed in a loose linen jacket and open shirt. I looked him right in the eye and said "Sir, I don't believe you have paid your bill." He must have thought I was the bouncer and immediately returned to his table.

Meanwhile, my friend chased the other guy out into the middle of the five lane road and grabbed him, dragging him back in to a full round of applause from the other diners.

Good times.
 
2012-09-15 10:13:44 AM  
ladys and germs.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F17BMQO0ITA
 
2012-09-15 10:34:37 AM  

skantea: Am I the only one that thinks this would make a great scene in a dark comedy.

Especially the awkward silence as the dead kid's friends ride home...


I am waffling on this idea.
 
2012-09-15 10:39:43 AM  
"Authorities said the man had been eating at a Waffle House near the intersection and he apparently was struck as he ran from the restaurant without paying."

Karma, with fries on the side.
/Darwin approved
 
2012-09-15 10:56:10 AM  
He might have made it had he eaten at the Salad House next door....
 
2012-09-15 12:28:05 PM  

Chariset: unlikely: The ultimate in hardcore.

His mom must be bursting with pride.

Greater redneckisity has no one than this: that he lay down his life for substandard hashbrowns.


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-09-15 01:27:14 PM  
Am I the only one composing a parody of "Love Shack" in my head because it was on the Atlanta Highway?

/Truck Smacked, baby, truck smacked
//Why yes, I AM bored.
 
2012-09-15 01:49:07 PM  
I can see doing a dine and dash, but to dine, dash, and die for Waffle House? Seems like poor judgment. He should have tried Olive Garden.
 
2012-09-15 02:01:44 PM  

EvilKatGurl: Am I the only one composing a parody of "Love Shack" in my head because it was on the Atlanta Highway?

/Truck Smacked, baby, truck smacked
//Why yes, I AM bored.


Bang. Bang....
 
2012-09-15 02:05:01 PM  
Once when I was 18 I was eating at Waffle House with a friend and after the bill came we both realized we had just enough to pay it. As in, the bill was like $11.38, and we had exactly $11.38. So we left that amount on the table, pennies and all. We must have looked like the biggest douchebags...then again even if we had left a proper tip, we still would've looked like the biggest douchebags, because of how we dressed back then. Baggy UFO pants, yikes.
 
2012-09-15 02:16:57 PM  

L.D. Ablo: What I wouldn't give for a Waffle House in this forsaken town.

if I had the money, I'd franchise one here in Yuma, Arizona.

I'd also franchise a Whataburger if I could.

One time on vacation in the Deep South, I came across a street that had a Whataburrger, Waffle House and a Krystal within a mile of each other. i just about jizzed myself. I totally ate at all of them.


I'm in Tucson and have one within a mile of my house. However, the Waffle Houses here are vastly inferior to the ones in the deep south. I've tried the one by my house as well as the one on the other side of town, and they're both terrible.
 
2012-09-15 03:52:46 PM  
A few years back in Grandview Mo. {South of KC} we saw a guy bolt across the Highway 71. Turns out he robbed the IHOP on a Saturday afternoon. Cops were all over the place in no time. He didn't get splattered or smothered though.
+1 for subby's headline
 
2012-09-15 04:37:20 PM  
I love it. This how the stupid should die. Crappiest last meal ever, violent, painful death, entertainment news for the rest of us. This is the true stupid tax.
 
2012-09-15 04:49:21 PM  
I came here to see how many thought it was hilarious that a 21 year old died.
His parents will never get over it. Everyone who loved him will be devestated.
It's pointless. It's stupid. It's sad.

Please take a close look at yourselves...this is farking sick.
 
2012-09-15 05:58:25 PM  

wickedragon: I came here to see how many thought it was hilarious that a 21 year old died.
His parents will never get over it. Everyone who loved him will be devestated.
It's pointless. It's stupid. It's sad.

Please take a close look at yourselves...this is farking sick.


Welcome to Fark.
 
2012-09-15 09:37:04 PM  

wickedragon: I came here to see how many thought it was hilarious that a 21 year old died.
His parents will never get over it. Everyone who loved him will be devestated.
It's pointless. It's stupid. It's sad.

Please take a close look at yourselves...this is farking sick.


I prefer to say -- nay, SING -- "Take a good look at yourself!"
 
2012-09-15 11:02:02 PM  

wickedragon: I came here to see how many thought it was hilarious that a 21 year old died.
His parents will never get over it. Everyone who loved him will be devestated.
It's pointless. It's stupid. It's sad.

Please take a close look at yourselves...this is farking sick.


Your bleeding heart...I sees it.

Look at it this way. The guy was reckless, a criminal, and arguably not very bright. Do you really not see the greater good in his removal from the gene pool? Sure, his parents will be sad, but this way he doesn't graduate to some other crime and harm anyone....or reproduce.
 
2012-09-15 11:20:23 PM  

Another Government Employee: EvilKatGurl: Am I the only one composing a parody of "Love Shack" in my head because it was on the Atlanta Highway?

/Truck Smacked, baby, truck smacked
//Why yes, I AM bored.

Bang. Bang....



Nah, nah, nah...

"Bam, bam, baaam, on the road, baby... Thump Thump!"
 
2012-09-16 01:21:25 AM  
The guy ate at a Waffle House

He was going to be dead within the hour anyway
 
2012-09-16 02:37:37 AM  

Silly Jesus: wickedragon: I came here to see how many thought it was hilarious that a 21 year old died.
His parents will never get over it. Everyone who loved him will be devestated.
It's pointless. It's stupid. It's sad.

Please take a close look at yourselves...this is farking sick.

Your bleeding heart...I sees it.

Look at it this way. The guy was reckless, a criminal, and arguably not very bright. Do you really not see the greater good in his removal from the gene pool? Sure, his parents will be sad, but this way he doesn't graduate to some other crime and harm anyone....or reproduce.


Yes, of course dining and dashing should carry the death penalty. I completely agree with you there. And of course all statistical evidence show that youths who dine and dash are irrevertible cold blooded murderers as well. And I also fully agree that anyone who does commit any sort of crime, no matter how small, should be sterilized.
But, come on. There's no need to call him stupid. Haven't you ever been so pumped up on adrenaline that you couldn't think straight for a few seconds? All it takes is two seconds of bad judgement, adrenaline pumping through your blood, blurry vision. You have to get to your friends and floor it before the staff realizes that you're gone.

PS! You're a horrible human being. You should probably be steralized so that you don't reproduce.
 
2012-09-16 07:55:14 AM  

wickedragon: Silly Jesus: wickedragon: I came here to see how many thought it was hilarious that a 21 year old died.
His parents will never get over it. Everyone who loved him will be devestated.
It's pointless. It's stupid. It's sad.

Please take a close look at yourselves...this is farking sick.

Your bleeding heart...I sees it.

Look at it this way. The guy was reckless, a criminal, and arguably not very bright. Do you really not see the greater good in his removal from the gene pool? Sure, his parents will be sad, but this way he doesn't graduate to some other crime and harm anyone....or reproduce.

Yes, of course dining and dashing should carry the death penalty. I completely agree with you there. And of course all statistical evidence show that youths who dine and dash are irrevertible cold blooded murderers as well. And I also fully agree that anyone who does commit any sort of crime, no matter how small, should be sterilized.
But, come on. There's no need to call him stupid. Haven't you ever been so pumped up on adrenaline that you couldn't think straight for a few seconds? All it takes is two seconds of bad judgement, adrenaline pumping through your blood, blurry vision. You have to get to your friends and floor it before the staff realizes that you're gone.

PS! You're a horrible human being. You should probably be steralized so that you don't reproduce.


i3.kym-cdn.com
 
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