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(Salon)   Just when you thought it couldn't get any derpier, Rush Limbaugh says Al-Qaida gave up bin Laden to help Obama's reelection chances   (salon.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, President Obama, Rush Limbaugh, White House, al-Qaeda, Osama bin Laden, SEAL Team 6, Steve Doocy, terrorist groups  
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2996 clicks; posted to Politics » on 13 Sep 2012 at 5:44 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-09-13 04:27:20 PM  
9 votes:
i.imgur.com
2012-09-13 06:33:11 PM  
5 votes:
img155.imageshack.us
2012-09-13 04:04:35 PM  
5 votes:
It's a brilliant plan.

al-Qaeda guy #1: "Ok, we have told the Americans where Osama bin Laden is. Now, they will go in there and kill them, ensuring Barack Obama becomes so popular that he gets reelected!"

al-Qaeda guy #2: "Brilliant! Then what do we do?"

al-Qaeda guy #1: "Not sure. Let's go ask Osama."

al-Qaeda guys together: "OH POOPS!"
2012-09-13 03:01:26 PM  
5 votes:
us12.memecdn.com
2012-09-13 06:00:14 PM  
4 votes:

mrshowrules: Baby Face Fister: I walked by a delivery truck the other day and I heard Rush blaring on his radio and thought to myself, "this guy is still on the air?"

Current sponsors:

ProFlowers
* overpriced

Sleep Train (Mattress Center)
* Worthless gimmick for old people

eharmony
* For Losers looking to latch on to a paycheck, I guess that is why they advertise on Rush

CARBONITE, Inc
* Overpriced and for idiots, but hey, at least you are backing up
.
Sleep Number Bed Select Comfort Corporation
* Worthless gimmick for old people, he seems to have the special mattress ad thing sewed up.

Oreck Upright Vacuum Cleaners
* More overpriced gimmick that does not work any better than a real vacuum.

Mid-West Life Insurance Company of Tennessee
* Scam for old people

AutoZone Inc.
* for the redneck listeners that have to build their own cars from parts in the yard

LegalZoom
* for the Rush listener paternity tests and divorces I guess.

Citrix Online (GoToMyPC)
* Why?

American Forces Network
* I have no idea.

Mission Pharmacal Company
* drugs and catheters for hoverround-bound rush listeners?

Life Quotes, Inc.
* Scam some old people

Lending Tree
* Scam some poor people

Doesn't take much effort to avoid these sleazy companies.
2012-09-13 05:52:38 PM  
4 votes:

I_Am_Weasel: I'm fairly certain it can get depier, and I fully expect that it will.

I believe that in short order someone will claim that Romney is being drugged by Democratic operatives and that it has resulted in him making inappropriate facial expressions. In fact, I do think thak Fark Fotoshoppers should probably get ahead of things and give us some images of Mitt with poorly chosen expressions in various situations.


Dammit, we overdosed him!

i1126.photobucket.com

/did not create that, my skillz are lacking.
2012-09-13 04:17:06 PM  
4 votes:

Jubeebee: Obama both is a warmongering dictator whose reckless use of drone attacks to devestate the al-Qaeda hierarchy (who aren't even a threat anymore thanks to President Bush) would bring him up on war crimes charges if it weren't for the socialist driveby MSM media,
AND
a terrorist sympathizing secret Muslin extremist who is just biding his time until he can unleash his unstoppable al-Qaeda allies to make all Americans wear burkas and apologize for the American Flag.

Will no one stop this Schrodinger's monst


He's also a mastermind who is so incompetent that he can't hide the fact that he's a socialist fascist communist mastermind.
2012-09-13 03:07:29 PM  
4 votes:
Dammit. I can't believe Rush is so close to the truth of things. Liberals, we are going to have to come up with a new strategy. Unless .... unless Rush's audience is too small to impact the election. Then we have a chance.
Mwaaah... mwuahaha ... mwuahahahahahaha ... mwuaha ... mwaaah .... *sigh*
2012-09-13 09:26:01 PM  
3 votes:

Bhasayate: Smirky the Wonder Chimp: That's an insult to catfish. Besides, some of them are cute, intelligent (for fish) and quite charming.

Word. We just got a 29 gallon tank, bought a few really small catfish, like the one in the pic you posted. They are fun and amusing fishy goofballs. Always "nom nom nom" on the bottom of the tank. Then, for apparently no reason, they decide to engage in super fast synchronized swimming, either back and forth or up and down. It's amazingly fast, and looks super silly, because they seem to waddle their entire bodies in order to move around. They are just so damn wiggly. Complete goofballs. My favorite two fish at the moment.

Just started the tank. The other mates are 3 danios, a gourami, and a red platy.


Two goldfish are in a tank. One looks over to the other one and says, "Are you sure you know how to drive this thing?"
2012-09-13 08:47:09 PM  
3 votes:
1.bp.blogspot.com
2012-09-13 06:48:42 PM  
3 votes:
www.lolbrary.com
2012-09-13 05:12:50 PM  
3 votes:
What's above Quantum Derpedoes?
2012-09-13 04:13:23 PM  
3 votes:

JerseyTim: It's a brilliant plan.

al-Qaeda guy #1: "Ok, we have told the Americans where Osama bin Laden is. Now, they will go in there and kill them, ensuring Barack Obama becomes so popular that he gets reelected!"

al-Qaeda guy #2: "Brilliant! Then what do we do?"

al-Qaeda guy #1: "Not sure. Let's go ask Osama."

al-Qaeda guys together: "OH POOPS!"


Obama both is a warmongering dictator whose reckless use of drone attacks to devestate the al-Qaeda hierarchy (who aren't even a threat anymore thanks to President Bush) would bring him up on war crimes charges if it weren't for the socialist driveby MSM media,
AND
a terrorist sympathizing secret Muslin extremist who is just biding his time until he can unleash his unstoppable al-Qaeda allies to make all Americans wear burkas and apologize for the American Flag.

Will no one stop this Schrodinger's monster.
2012-09-13 03:12:09 PM  
3 votes:
Obama hid Mitt Romney's tax returns.
2012-09-13 03:05:04 PM  
3 votes:
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
i.imgur.com
2012-09-13 09:29:58 PM  
2 votes:

AcneVulgaris: Rush is a MASTER troll. There are none better.


There is another...
www.blogcdn.com
2012-09-13 07:15:34 PM  
2 votes:

USP .45: Weren't libs going on about "Bush is going to reveal Osama before election X" for years? Oh wait, I have a Fark account and saw it constantly.

Now Limbaugh says a "wild theory" which is "off the top of his head" is that some other group possibly used the discovery of Osama for their own agenda and it's butthurt central around here.

It's so unlikely that he probably didn't need to mention it, but he has a few hours of airtime to fill on a daily basis.


heisanevilgenius.pbwiki.com
2012-09-13 06:34:49 PM  
2 votes:
cl.jroo.me
2012-09-13 06:03:54 PM  
2 votes:

Arachnophobe: I_Am_Weasel: I'm fairly certain it can get depier, and I fully expect that it will.

I believe that in short order someone will claim that Romney is being drugged by Democratic operatives and that it has resulted in him making inappropriate facial expressions. In fact, I do think thak Fark Fotoshoppers should probably get ahead of things and give us some images of Mitt with poorly chosen expressions in various situations.

Dammit, we overdosed him!

[i1126.photobucket.com image 850x586]

/did not create that, my skillz are lacking.


It's only the first stage...
media.tumblr.com

/A vote for Eel Romney is a vote for Amurrica!
2012-09-13 05:53:57 PM  
2 votes:

HotWingConspiracy: So now we can't credit Bush and Cheney? I thought they did all the work.


No! I mean yes! Hell, I don't know any more.
2012-09-13 05:49:50 PM  
2 votes:

GAT_00: What's above Quantum Derpedoes?


Derper-posed Herptanglement Beam.
2012-09-13 04:44:48 PM  
2 votes:
demotivationalpost.com
2012-09-13 04:25:38 PM  
2 votes:
WOW RUSH I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT THAT WAY. I BETTER VOTE STRAIGHT-TICKET REPUBLICAN THIS FALL
2012-09-13 03:57:54 PM  
2 votes:
1) Rush Limbaugh has knowledge that no one else has without secret communications with Al Queda leaders
2) Interrogate him for the secret communications
3) When he doesn't give up his sources:

4) Torture him

In a perfect world this will be.
2012-09-13 03:57:08 PM  
2 votes:
media.tumblr.com

*wiping away tears*
2012-09-13 03:22:50 PM  
2 votes:
Obama put this kitten in front of Mitt.

img407.imageshack.us

Thank Rich Cream: for that investigative journalism.
2012-09-13 03:07:37 PM  
2 votes:
I would call him the worst kind of bottom-scraper, but the visual that comes with that is too horrible to contemplate.
2012-09-14 01:45:30 AM  
1 vote:

fusillade762: Insatiable Jesus: Fart_Machine: USP .45: Osama isn't even that important overall."

Which lib said that....

Owned like cheap real-estate!

What kind of schniedelwutzen picks a gun as a screen-name?

*backs out of room slowly*


Best part . . . PONIES!

media-mobpapers.theotaku.com
2012-09-14 01:24:37 AM  
1 vote:

Insatiable Jesus: Fart_Machine: USP .45: Osama isn't even that important overall."

Which lib said that....

Owned like cheap real-estate!

What kind of schniedelwutzen picks a gun as a screen-name?


*backs out of room slowly*
2012-09-14 12:19:27 AM  
1 vote:
Sounds like Rush has upgraded to snorting the Oxycontin now.
2012-09-13 10:39:07 PM  
1 vote:
i1079.photobucket.com
2012-09-13 09:07:24 PM  
1 vote:
"What if Ayman al-Zawahiri and other Al Qaeda leaders gave up Osama bin Laden for the express purpose of making Obama look good?"

i.imgur.com
2012-09-13 08:43:27 PM  
1 vote:
i480.photobucket.com

/I suck at Photoshop. Still trying to teach myself - I need a class, dammit.
2012-09-13 08:42:35 PM  
1 vote:
I can't even stand right now because the derp is too strong
2012-09-13 08:18:18 PM  
1 vote:
CARBONITE, Inc.

Doesn't take much effort to avoid these sleazy companies.


I have bounties to transport and my cargo hold is only so big.
2012-09-13 07:41:01 PM  
1 vote:

USP .45: Fart_Machine: USP .45: Osama isn't even that important overall."

Which lib said that....

yep, and I found it hilarious at the time considering it was what numerous Fark libs were going on about, because they just assumed Bush would get him and spike the football, and erroneously justify the shiatstorm Bush started in the middle east unrelated to Osama.



As a Fark "lib", let me say, Enjoy November you dissembling piece of shiat.
2012-09-13 07:31:54 PM  
1 vote:

USP .45: Mugato: This is farking unbelievable, yet not really unbelievable. Obama did with a year of intelligence and an order what Bush couldn't do by destroying two countries before finally giving up. But you people will not give him anything. Nothing. Not even that.

I do not deny the chronology of the situation. You're acting like 3 Bush terms couldn't possibly have produced Osama. And you're acting like if Obama was elected president in 2000, he'd have absolutely bagged Osama in his first term. All of this by default. This is farking unbelievable, yet not really unbelievable. There is no magical attribute you won't attribute to Barack.


Facts are inconvenient things.
2012-09-13 07:29:39 PM  
1 vote:

Mugato: This is farking unbelievable, yet not really unbelievable. Obama did with a year of intelligence and an order what Bush couldn't do by destroying two countries before finally giving up. But you people will not give him anything. Nothing. Not even that.


I do not deny the chronology of the situation. You're acting like 3 Bush terms couldn't possibly have produced Osama. And you're acting like if Obama was elected president in 2000, he'd have absolutely bagged Osama in his first term. All of this by default. This is farking unbelievable, yet not really unbelievable. There is no magical attribute you won't attribute to Barack.
2012-09-13 07:23:03 PM  
1 vote:

USP .45: Weren't libs going on about "Bush is going to reveal Osama before election X" for years? Oh wait, I have a Fark account and saw it constantly.


No one but the lunatic fringe, if anyone.

Now Limbaugh says a "wild theory" which is "off the top of his head" is that some other group possibly used the discovery of Osama for their own agenda and it's butthurt central around here.

It's so unlikely that he probably didn't need to mention it, but he has a few hours of airtime to fill on a daily basis.


This is farking unbelievable, yet not really unbelievable. Obama did with a year of intelligence and an order what Bush couldn't do by destroying two countries before finally giving up. But you people will not give him anything. Nothing. Not even that.
2012-09-13 07:19:09 PM  
1 vote:

USP .45: Weren't libs going on about "Bush is going to reveal Osama before election X" for years? Oh wait, I have a Fark account and saw it constantly.


Yes, that is a wild theory. It assumes that Bush and Co. were competent, and actually willing to do the things needed to get Osama, like fly to where Osama was and grab him. Which is ludicrous. Since, they refused to go after A.Q. top people when they had the chance.

The target was a meeting of Qaeda leaders that intelligence officials thought included Ayman al-Zawahri, Osama bin Laden's top deputy and the man believed to run the terrorist group's operations.

But the mission was called off after Donald H. Rumsfeld, then the defense secretary, rejected an 11th-hour appeal by Porter J. Goss, then the director of the Central Intelligence Agency, officials said.


Silly Libs, thinking Bush and Co. wanted to get Osama and were competent.
2012-09-13 07:14:44 PM  
1 vote:

THIS IS WHAT REPUBLICAN VOTERS ACTUALLY BELIEVE

2012-09-13 07:07:05 PM  
1 vote:

jso2897: And they want them back - why do you think they pulled this crap just before the election?
They must be pissed that Romney took the box of ammo they handed him and dropped it on his dick.



If you gave Mitt Romney a picture of Obama doing a 13 year old girl on the Resolute desk, his statement to the press would be, "Too old, alive and the wrong sex."
2012-09-13 06:59:50 PM  
1 vote:

RyogaM: Why would Al Qaeda want Obama to win?

WASHINGTON, July 7 - A secret military operation in early 2005 to capture senior members of Al Qaeda in Pakistan's tribal areas was aborted at the last minute after top Bush administration officials decided it was too risky and could jeopardize relations with Pakistan, according to intelligence and military officials.

The target was a meeting of Qaeda leaders that intelligence officials thought included Ayman al-Zawahri, Osama bin Laden's top deputy and the man believed to run the terrorist group's operations.

But the mission was called off after Donald H. Rumsfeld, then the defense secretary, rejected an 11th-hour appeal by Porter J. Goss, then the director of the Central Intelligence Agency, officials said. Members of a Navy Seals unit in parachute gear had already boarded C-130 cargo planes in Afghanistan when the mission was canceled, said a former senior intelligence official involved in the planning.

They had the Republicans at their beck and call.


And they want them back - why do you think they pulled this crap just before the election?
They must be pissed that Romney took the box of ammo they handed him and dropped it on his dick.
2012-09-13 06:51:45 PM  
1 vote:

Smirky the Wonder Chimp: That's an insult to catfish. Besides, some of them are cute, intelligent (for fish) and quite charming.


Word. We just got a 29 gallon tank, bought a few really small catfish, like the one in the pic you posted. They are fun and amusing fishy goofballs. Always "nom nom nom" on the bottom of the tank. Then, for apparently no reason, they decide to engage in super fast synchronized swimming, either back and forth or up and down. It's amazingly fast, and looks super silly, because they seem to waddle their entire bodies in order to move around. They are just so damn wiggly. Complete goofballs. My favorite two fish at the moment.

Just started the tank. The other mates are 3 danios, a gourami, and a red platy.
2012-09-13 06:50:52 PM  
1 vote:
Damn you Fartbongo! You literally can't take a bowel movement without f*cking up!
2012-09-13 06:13:46 PM  
1 vote:
Almost two months to go --- I'm a bit worried of the nuclear-level derp we're gonna see in late October. The streams will cross and who the fark knows what will happen then.
2012-09-13 06:10:35 PM  
1 vote:
media.tumblr.com
2012-09-13 05:55:21 PM  
1 vote:
This makes total sense.

If you're one of Rush's listeners
2012-09-13 05:49:51 PM  
1 vote:
Damn. I just...it's.....he........the........

Damn.

So this is what desperation sounds like. Thank God he's on radio so I don't have to see what it looks like. Or live, so I'd know what it smelled like.

Now I've made myself sick. Thanks, Subby.
2012-09-13 05:49:46 PM  
1 vote:

GAT_00: What's above Quantum Derpedoes?


Dumping the Derp Cores and detonating them to throw ourselves free in the resulting explosion of wharrgarbl.
2012-09-13 05:49:07 PM  
1 vote:
So now we can't credit Bush and Cheney? I thought they did all the work.
2012-09-13 05:32:53 PM  
1 vote:

GAT_00: What's above Quantum Derpedoes?


Derpageddon
2012-09-13 04:37:37 PM  
1 vote:
Reminding everyone that Osama is shark turds now thanks to Obama. That's some outstanding PR for the Mittens team, there, Rush.
2012-09-13 04:11:45 PM  
1 vote:
Rush Limbaugh: Al-Qaeda fears Barack Obama so much that they sacrificed their leader to him.
2012-09-13 03:56:09 PM  
1 vote:

Baby Face Fister: I walked by a delivery truck the other day and I heard Rush blaring on his radio and thought to myself, "this guy is still on the air?"


Current sponsors:

ProFlowers
Sleep Train (Mattress Center)
eharmony
CARBONITE, Inc.
Sleep Number Bed Select Comfort Corporation
Oreck Upright Vacuum Cleaners
Mid-West Life Insurance Company of Tennessee
AutoZone Inc.
LegalZoom
Citrix Online (GoToMyPC)
American Forces Network
Mission Pharmacal Company
Life Quotes, Inc.
Lending Tree

Doesn't take much effort to avoid these sleazy companies.
2012-09-13 03:29:47 PM  
1 vote:

I_Am_Weasel: I believe that in short order someone will claim that Romney is being drugged by Democratic operatives and that it has resulted in him making inappropriate facial expressions.


Well, sometimes the magic underwear can be a bit binding.
2012-09-13 03:25:33 PM  
1 vote:

impaler: Obama didn't leave Iraq. Iraq left us.


Eh, I got over it.

/unlike fark
//*shakes fist*
2012-09-13 03:24:08 PM  
1 vote:
Obama didn't leave Iraq. Iraq left us.
2012-09-13 03:02:08 PM  
1 vote:
Because he's a secret Muslim while at the same time supporting Israel. Which is it, derpers?
 
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