FARK.com: (7324147) Woman who was missing for five days is found alive and sitting in her freezer

If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

		Woman who was missing for five days is found alive and sitting in her freezer (kjrh.com)		67
		More: Cool, woman missing

• • •

15954 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Sep 2012 at 5:40 AM | Favorite | share:

Share this link:

URL:

http://fark.com/go/7324147

Bookmark:

Article Comments close

67 Comments (+0 »)

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

FirstNationalBastard		2012-09-12 08:18:15 PM

Well, someone never saw that episode of Punky Brewster.

RexTalionis		2012-09-12 08:20:40 PM

Cool.

Wanebo		2012-09-12 08:21:39 PM

She sounds frigid.

Apos		2012-09-12 08:23:39 PM

Thankfully,she escaped this fate:

i37.photobucket.com

DanZero		2012-09-12 08:30:23 PM

That's a freezin'

scottydoesntknow		2012-09-12 08:36:27 PM

DanZero: [25.media.tumblr.com image 500x375]

That's a freezin'

*shakes fist*

well played

"Moon Pie. What a time to be alive!"

SlothB77		2012-09-12 09:04:10 PM

sounds like she wasn't even locked in the freezer. she could have gotten out of it and huddled somewhere else inside the closet.

GAT_00		2012-09-12 09:10:25 PM

So I guess it's no longer a cold case.

revrendjim		2012-09-12 09:15:02 PM

There's a story floating around somewhere about a McD's employee who was locked in the freezer overnight. All modern commercial freezers have a latch on the inside.

MaudlinMutantMollusk		2012-09-12 09:15:44 PM

No one thaw that coming, I'll bet

Ennuipoet		2012-09-12 09:29:09 PM

GAT_00: So I guess it's no longer a cold case.

You took off a pair sunglasses write before you posted that, didn't you?

/yeeeaahhhhh

Sim Tree		2012-09-12 09:31:21 PM

"Possibly that she thought maybe there was a tornado coming

Or the nuke from Indiana Jones 4

Krieghund		2012-09-12 10:41:35 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: No one thaw that coming, I'll bet

Icy what you did there.

basemetal		2012-09-12 11:15:54 PM

Was wondering if this story would make the main page. Seemed like appropriate material.

The First Four Black Sabbath Albums		2012-09-12 11:31:29 PM

FTFA: "Yeah, my mom takes a lot of medications, and it mixes with her system and it don't give her an appetite at all," he said.

Oh, well that makes sense. This was all caused by her lack of appetite!

And, some pun involving cold temperatures!

Because People in power are Stupid		2012-09-12 11:53:16 PM

I wonder what her fark handle is.

ox45tallboy		2012-09-13 01:56:57 AM

/approves

Makh		2012-09-13 02:40:46 AM

Ambien'n'Whiskey is not right for everyone. Side effects include thinking Glenn Beck is alright and sitting in your farking freezer and saying "Toot! Toot! I'm a tug boat!" See your doctor if this last for more than 4 hours.

ox45tallboy		2012-09-13 03:01:35 AM

Freezers should be only for long-term storage. Most humans keep fine in the fridge for up to 5 days, with the added bonus of not having to defrost, which can take up to 72 hours depending on mass.

quatchi		2012-09-13 04:04:08 AM

Cool tag?

Sees what you did there, Subby.

/+1.
//Link is the opposite of cold.

JonnyBGoode		2012-09-13 05:46:05 AM

What an ice old lady.

Doctor Jan Itor		2012-09-13 05:52:56 AM

That is NOT how you play freeze tag.

Dadoody		2012-09-13 05:55:53 AM

AverageAmericanGuy		2012-09-13 05:55:55 AM

Even if there were a latch on the inside, it seems like that once that lid clicked in place, the pitch darkness and realization that you might suffocate would make it difficult to think clearly enough to find the latch.

Maybe freezers should have motion sensors on the inside that turn the lights on if something inside is moving.

ox45tallboy		2012-09-13 05:59:04 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Maybe freezers should have motion sensors on the inside that turn the lights on if something inside is moving.

No, that wouldn't work for me...

Snapper Carr		2012-09-13 05:59:34 AM

Urge to kill...rising.

RatMaster999		2012-09-13 06:01:46 AM

signaljammer		2012-09-13 06:04:49 AM

Car trunks use the expedient of a glow-in-the-dark handle.

Zmog		2012-09-13 06:06:19 AM

quatchi: Cool tag?

[theinfosphere.org image 180x137]

Icy what you did there, Subby.

Sorry, just had to FTFY.

mike_d85		2012-09-13 06:15:05 AM

She was just chillin'

Big Ramifications		2012-09-13 06:26:49 AM

Apos: Thankfully,she escaped this fate:

[i37.photobucket.com image 320x240]
~
Came to post this!

profplump		2012-09-13 06:27:18 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Maybe freezers should have motion sensors on the inside that turn the lights on if something inside is moving.

The freezer was not closed. She was just crazy enough to climb in and sit there.

Quantum Apostrophe		2012-09-13 06:32:11 AM

Protein. Protein from the freezer!

Donn C. Drummond in Disguise		2012-09-13 06:33:03 AM

ox45tallboy: [a1.ec-images.myspacecdn.com image 600x450]

Freezers should be only for long-term storage. Most humans keep fine in the fridge for up to 5 days, with the added bonus of not having to defrost, which can take up to 72 hours depending on mass.

Poor kid! No one should have to freeze alone!

Donn C. Drummond in Disguise		2012-09-13 06:40:20 AM

profplump: AverageAmericanGuy: Maybe freezers should have motion sensors on the inside that turn the lights on if something inside is moving.

The freezer was not closed. She was just crazy enough to climb in and sit there.

Like her, I consider Futurama to be Matt Groening's finest hour, but, unlike her, I don't expect to meet a hot monster-eye in a thousand years!

tommyl66		2012-09-13 06:52:08 AM

And there sat Theresa, looking cool and calm, in the heart of the freezer roar;
And she wore a smile you could see a mile, and she said: "Please close that door.
It's fine in here, but I greatly fear you'll let in the sun so gold-
Since I left Plumtree, down in Tennessee, it's the first time I've been cold."

sniderman		2012-09-13 07:15:12 AM

danielscissorhands		2012-09-13 07:27:35 AM

Summoner101		2012-09-13 07:52:53 AM

She's almost my perfect woman!

/She just needs to be ground up

MythDragon		2012-09-13 08:03:59 AM

Ice to see you! Cool party! Chill out, there's no reason for a cold reception.

/ham

Nickster79		2012-09-13 08:35:22 AM

I wonder if she still got fresh with anyone.

/I hate myself

acad1228		2012-09-13 08:44:21 AM

Hot (and cold)

Thraeryn		2012-09-13 08:47:27 AM

raPUNzel, raPUNzel, let down your COLDen hair!

/amidoinitrite?

Englebert Slaptyback		2012-09-13 08:47:50 AM

ox45tallboy

Freezers should be only for long-term storage. Most humans keep fine in the fridge for up to 5 days, with the added bonus of not having to defrost, which can take up to 72 hours depending on mass.

3.bp.blogspot.com

Pic is hot. Unlike Carbone.

numbone		2012-09-13 08:48:41 AM

She took hide and seek to a new level.

Rhames		2012-09-13 09:15:36 AM

FirstNationalBastard: Well, someone never saw that episode of Punky Brewster.

Or EVERY SINGLE SITCOM EVER!

Ctrl-Alt-Del		2012-09-13 09:16:57 AM

Maybe I'm showing my years, here, but I am seriously disappoint, farkers

www.sitcomsonline.com

imtheonlylp		2012-09-13 09:38:47 AM

hide in freezer, get frostbite...
stay out, end up in Oz...

/confused

Baz the Spaz		2012-09-13 09:41:53 AM

We see what you did there, subby.

NashMcNash		2012-09-13 09:52:16 AM

Sim Tree: "Possibly that she thought maybe there was a tornado coming

Or the nuke from Indiana Jones 4

You know what's funny, though? At zero hour, in full panic of nuclear attack, how many of us will make a last ditch effort to climb into the nearest refrigerator because....well, ya never know.

Displayed 50 of 67 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh comments

This thread is closed to new comments.