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(NYPost)   You're stuck in a NYC elevator with Mila Kunis. Do you call for help?   (nypost.com ) divider line
    More: Unlikely, Mila Kunis, elevators, Robin Williams, Ashton Kutcher, West Village  
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10256 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Sep 2012 at 10:07 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



92 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-12 05:52:56 AM  
Going up, she said, uh, huh
Just as we had started
To climb together, hoo, hoo

Looking up, I said
Hey, look, umm
Maybe I could see you tonight
And she said, never

Thought I was out of luck
But ten seconds later
Somehow we got stuck
In that elevator, woo

Heaven on the 7th floor
(Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha)
Heaven on the 7th floor
(I wanna tell you)
I've never been so high before
So don't you rescue me
Never set me free
Hey, hey, hey

We're alone, I said, oh yeah
Looks like we could
Be here all night together
Hoo, hoo

There's a phone, she said, uh huh
You'd better have us out
In five minutes time, whatever
Please could you make it ten
I told the operator
I'm having so much fun
In this elevator

Heaven on the 7th floor
Heaven on the 7th floor
(I'm up in Heaven and I)
I've never been so high before
So don't you rescue me
Never set me free
Hey, hey, hey
I'm in Heaven

I'm in Heaven
Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo
Heaven, hoo, hoo, hoo

And as the Muzak played
Sooner or later I knew
We'd fall in love in the elevator

Heaven on the 7th floor
Heaven on the 7th floor
Heaven on the 7th floor
Heaven on the 7th floor
I've never been so high before
So don't you rescue me
Never set me free
Hey, hey, hey

Heaven on the 7th floor
Heaven on the 7th floor...
 
2012-09-12 08:40:19 AM  
Sources said the actress, who is dating Ashton Kutcher, and a female friend

I'll just pretend I didn't see that 2nd comma there.
 
2012-09-12 08:48:07 AM  
A vestibule with Jill Goodacre?
 
2012-09-12 08:51:35 AM  
Unless she's in bath salts,subby,the answer is ALWAYS no.
 
2012-09-12 08:53:15 AM  

Apos: Unless she's in on bath salts,subby,the answer is ALWAYS no.


Slight prepositional lapse.
 
2012-09-12 09:38:31 AM  
Thread is useless without Mila Kunis pics.

/Seriously, a celeb getting stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes is not a story.
 
2012-09-12 09:43:40 AM  

Charlie Freak: A vestibule with Jill Goodacre?


I'd get stuck in her vestibule any time:

www.modelpix.com
 
2012-09-12 09:49:00 AM  

quatchi: Thread is useless without Mila Kunis pics.



So true. Let's rectify that right now:

celebritymagnet.com

www.magxone.com

2.bp.blogspot.com

wasaphollywood.com
 
2012-09-12 09:52:45 AM  
Yes, but in the interim, I want her to try to teach me Russian to keep my mind off being trapped.
 
2012-09-12 09:58:34 AM  

Apos: quatchi: Thread is useless without Mila Kunis pics.

So true. Let's rectify that right now:

[Yummy Mila]

[Hellz, yeah.]

[In a NY minute I would]

[Moar Mila]


^___^

It is a good and righteous thing you do here.

Bless you and your kin down unto the umpteenth generation!

*bows*
 
2012-09-12 10:09:39 AM  
Of course I'd call for help. You think I always carry a ball-gag and a prophylactic?
 
2012-09-12 10:11:35 AM  
someone got to live out my fantasy.
 
2012-09-12 10:12:20 AM  
When is this biatch going to pose nude?
 
2012-09-12 10:14:32 AM  

quatchi: Apos: quatchi: Thread is useless without Mila Kunis pics.

So true. Let's rectify that right now:

[Yummy Mila]

[Hellz, yeah.]

[In a NY minute I would]

[Moar Mila]

^___^

It is a good and righteous thing you do here.

Bless you and your kin down unto the umpteenth generation!

*bows*


*tips derby* No problem. I can only hope that my Fark compatriots will continue the good work.
 
2012-09-12 10:15:37 AM  

doczoidberg: When is this biatch going to pose nude?


3.bp.blogspot.com

For the record. You're an idiot.
 
2012-09-12 10:16:29 AM  
Threaten to kill everyone else until she dates me.

/or I could fart
/or pee in the corner
/or just scream until firefighters appeared.
 
2012-09-12 10:17:48 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Yes, but in the interim, I want her to try to teach me Russian to keep my mind off being trapped.


Russian. I think her Ukrainian is weak?
 
2012-09-12 10:18:28 AM  
img.photobucket.com

Thankfully, I learned exactly what to do in this situation

/Thanks, Oprah's book club.
 
2012-09-12 10:18:32 AM  

LewDux: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Yes, but in the interim, I want her to try to teach me Russian to keep my mind off being trapped.

Russian? You think her Ukrainian is weak?



FTFM
 
2012-09-12 10:20:20 AM  
They were stuck in the elevator for 45 minutes, and it became very hot in there...

Go on...
 
2012-09-12 10:20:30 AM  
If I'm in this situation....

10 Seconds after the elevator abruptly stops

"Ms. Kunis, let me just say I'm a big fan of your work on the big screen and the small screen.
It's clear that we're never going to get out of here. We have to think of the future. We have to start repopulating this elevator if mankind is going to survive."
 
2012-09-12 10:21:44 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Yes, but in the interim, I want her to try to teach me Russian to keep my mind off being trapped.


I'm not going to front and say that she's got sharp knees (she is a beautiful, exotic looking woman), but
she really never lit my fuse until I saw this clip of her chastising a reporter in Russian.
After seeing
that, I will now beat all of you with a glass-encrusted baseball bat to have the chance to be in the same
zip code as her.
 
2012-09-12 10:23:12 AM  
assets.bizjournals.com

The answer's always no.
 
2012-09-12 10:23:27 AM  
I'm looking forward to the day that cheat Ashton hurts her. HahA.
 
2012-09-12 10:24:44 AM  
None of you seem to understand. I'm not locked in there with her. SHE's locked in there with *ME*!
geek-news.mtv.com
 
2012-09-12 10:26:33 AM  

quatchi: Thread is useless without Mila Kunis pics.

/Seriously, a celeb getting stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes is not a story.


there was an elevator in my city that recently took someone's head off. that was a story for a while.
 
2012-09-12 10:29:01 AM  
I'd go down on her in an elevator any time. The others trapped would be welcome to watch, take pictures, etc.
 
2012-09-12 10:31:08 AM  
Do Icall for help? No. I call for rape.
 
2012-09-12 10:32:41 AM  
Mila Kunis - once again proving Eastern Europe and Russia have a secret Sexy Gene.
 
2012-09-12 10:38:35 AM  
Proof that God is real and Justin Timberlake is his Chosen One.

www.shoppingblog.com
 
2012-09-12 10:38:37 AM  

JokerMattly: Mila Kunis - once again proving Eastern Europe and Russia have a secret Sexy Gene.


Followed shortly by the Babushka gene.
 
2012-09-12 10:38:58 AM  
that has to be the dumbest question ever posed.
 
2012-09-12 10:39:44 AM  
Well firs thing yo do is rip the emergency phone out of the wall. After that it writes itself
 
2012-09-12 10:42:06 AM  

Charlie Freak: Followed shortly by the Babushka gene.


Yep...get your fapping to Mila out of the way now, considering in 20 years she'll look like:

russiapedia.rt.com
 
2012-09-12 10:42:46 AM  
Subby didn't point out that you were also trapped in an elevator with Ashton Kutcher, which would have me screaming for help, especially when that negates any benefit to being trapped in one with Mila
 
2012-09-12 10:47:04 AM  
"Shut up, Meg."
 
2012-09-12 10:48:08 AM  

Digitalstrange: Subby didn't point out that you were also trapped in an elevator with Ashton Kutcher, which would have me screaming for help, especially when that negates any benefit to being trapped in one with Mila


I'd accept that threeway just to be able to tap that.
 
2012-09-12 10:48:17 AM  
*elevator finally opens*

Firemen: WHAR MILA KUNIS? WHAR?
Me: No Mila Kunis in here, fellas. Sorry. She was in here for awhile, but the minute we started making out she was sucked into the black hole of disappointment, never to return.
 
2012-09-12 10:48:20 AM  

braedan


If I'm in this situation....

10 Seconds after the elevator abruptly stops

"Ms. Kunis, let me just say I'm a big fan of your work on the big screen and the small screen.
It's clear that we're never going to get out of here. We have to think of the future. We have to start repopulating this elevator if mankind is going to survive."


Then when she says no and/or laughs, you can say "Shut up, Meg."
 
2012-09-12 10:48:24 AM  

Charlie Freak: A vestibule with Jill Goodacre?


You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection.
 
2012-09-12 10:48:54 AM  
I'd call...


for more condoms and Gatorade.
 
2012-09-12 10:50:48 AM  

Digitalstrange: Subby didn't point out that you were also trapped in an elevator with Ashton Kutcher, which would have me screaming for help, especially when that negates any benefit to being trapped in one with Mila


Actually, for all his reputation as a douchebag, Ashton Kutcher is by all accounts a very nice, smart
guy, so if it came down to it I wouldn't mind being trapped in an elevator with him.

A good friend of mine worked with him on THAT 70S SHOW, and said that he was never anything
other than a total professional and a pleasure to work with no matter what the situation.

I would get cross, however, if they decided to get frisky with each other, since MMF threesomes
really aren't my thing.
 
2012-09-12 10:57:43 AM  
Like you all would have a chance. So my answer is Yes.

/realistic
 
2012-09-12 11:00:58 AM  
I 'pretend' to call for help
 
2012-09-12 11:07:45 AM  
Ya, call the janitor for help to clean up the river of spunk being dumped!
 
2012-09-12 11:07:47 AM  

DjangoStonereaver: Digitalstrange: Subby didn't point out that you were also trapped in an elevator with Ashton Kutcher, which would have me screaming for help, especially when that negates any benefit to being trapped in one with Mila

Actually, for all his reputation as a douchebag, Ashton Kutcher is by all accounts a very nice, smart
guy, so if it came down to it I wouldn't mind being trapped in an elevator with him.

A good friend of mine worked with him on THAT 70S SHOW, and said that he was never anything
other than a total professional and a pleasure to work with no matter what the situation.

I would get cross, however, if they decided to get frisky with each other, since MMF threesomes
really aren't my thing.


So a good friend of yours worked with him on THAT 70S SHOW. That's all you really wanted to say.
 
2012-09-12 11:15:26 AM  
"Do you... uh.. do you remember when... uh... you were in that Forgetting Sarah Marshall movie? That was awesome."
*puts hands in pockets*
*spaghetti falls out*
 
2012-09-12 11:17:11 AM  
Firefighters reported that when they opened the door, the other eight people in the elevator were facing the walls, and Kunis was screaming "Don't look at me! Don't look at me!!"

While Kunis was grateful for being rescued from the elevator, the other occupants said that they were grateful for being rescued from Mila Kunis.
 
2012-09-12 11:20:05 AM  

DjangoStonereaver: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Yes, but in the interim, I want her to try to teach me Russian to keep my mind off being trapped.

I'm not going to front and say that she's got sharp knees (she is a beautiful, exotic looking woman), but
she really never lit my fuse until I saw this clip of her chastising a reporter in Russian. After seeing
that, I will now beat all of you with a glass-encrusted baseball bat to have the chance to be in the same
zip code as her.


That's exactly what I was thinking of.
 
2012-09-12 11:22:48 AM  

Elvis_Bogart: Heaven on the 7th floor


Yikes. I don't think I've heard that song since it was current.

/what a terrible, terrible song
//further proof that actors should not be singers
 
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