Was going to write a long CSB now it will be just a short SB.

Best outcome I ever had trying to be a good citizen and go to jury duty was to watch a judge rip some idiot a new corn chute when he asked to be let off because he hates everyone and they're all guilty till proven innocent. People in the court were literally laughing out loud at the clown while the judge tore him up. It was great.

Such a large man, such a small closet.

I would be a great juror. I can tell if a person is guilty just by looking at them.

Was in court once and this one guy was obviously answering all the questions in the most objectionable way he could. Dropping racial slurs, cursing, the whole gambit...the judge warned him once but this guy just kept on. He hit him with a contempt charge and made him sit in a cell for a few hours.

Don't screw with a judge, in that courtroom they are omnipotent.

Everyone knows that if you want to get out of jury duty, just use the 'N' word.

Nullification.

At least in the U.S., if the judge can't rehabilitate the potential juror, the juror must be dismissed in order to protect the due process rights of the defendant (or of both the plaintiff and the defendant, if a civil jury trial. I've seen judges rehabilitate people with similarly stated beliefs before, usually by asking a series of ridiculously leading questions. ("Now, you understand that if selected, you will have a duty to be fair and impartial? And do you think, if I told you how important it was, that you could be fair and impartial, even to a person who was a member of group you deeply disliked? Surely, you understand, despite your personal beliefs, that there are some people who are members of that group who are in fact, good, upstanding, law abiding people, right? And if I told you that you should treat this defendant, as though he was one of those, that he deserved to be treated by you as though he was innocent of all of this, if I told you all of that, you'd be able to judge him fairly and impartially, don't you think?")

If the person listens to all of those questions and then says "No, your honor, I think they should all burn" well then you dismiss the person from the jury. Even if he comes around in the end, he almost certainly won't serve because one side or the other will preempt him. (In most jurisdictions, each side can strike three people from the jury without stating any cause). I've seen lawyers who would probably *benefit* from having a racist on their jury use a preemptory strike to have them removed, just so they won't have to deal with the appeal that will inevitably follow from having that person sit on the jury.

Also, most judges want their trials to run smoothly, and while no one wants to be at jury duty, the cases will usually go a lot better for all involved if you don't have any absolute malcontents on the jury. So the bottom line is that if you're willing to make an ass out of yourself to appear unqualified, most judges will just toss you rather than deal with you. Unless you've caught an ornery judge on a bad day, in which case he may well decide to both kick you off the jury and hold you in contempt until the end of the trial, just because he damn well can.

Guilty of calling a spade a spade?

Mixolydian Master: [www.si.edu image 309x275]
Does not look down on attractive and successful African-Americans, kikes, wops or greasers

LOL. Preview before posting




/as you were

Sure this was England, and this kind of maneuver obviously works there. I don't see how the man can be charged with not serving on a jury because the judge bought his excuse and dismissed him.

No, in the USA, all you have to do is say something to the effect of being a "fully informed juror" and being "eager to take part in our system of justice where the juror is both determiner of fact and the law", and the judge will either let you go, or you're free to jury nullify away.

Amateur! When I was selected and my number came up to be interviewed...I ran down the aisle like it was the Price is Right high-fiving all other candidates, attorneys, judge, bailiff, or anybody else within reach.

Or, as it was in my case, you can go ahead and serve and if the state can't prove its case to your satisfaction you can refuse to find the defendant guilty.

My first jury was a real trip - luck of the draw and I ended up as the foreman. I wanted to stand up in court and say "Professor Plum in the Library with the Lead Pipe," so bad.

plausdeny: Sure this was England, and this kind of maneuver obviously works there. I don't see how the man can be charged with not serving on a jury because the judge bought his excuse and dismissed him.

No, in the USA, all you have to do is say something to the effect of being a "fully informed juror" and being "eager to take part in our system of justice where the juror is both determiner of fact and the law", and the judge will either let you go, or you're free to jury nullify away.

Of course, jury nullification has primarily been used to acquit lynch mobs. So... yeah.

Hey, he's right. There are two types of men in the world. Gays and homophobes.

After serving on a criminal jury and realizing the level of understanding my "peers" had of the concept of proof beyond a reasonable doubt, I now find the only viable options if facing criminal charges to be either a bench trial or suicide by cop.

semiotix: Dwedit: Everyone knows that if you want to get out of jury duty, just use the 'N' word.

Nullification.

Well, sure, if you say it while you're being selected. That's basically the same thing as saying "I sure am happy to be here, judge, doing my part to convict anyone and everyone the prosecutor sees fit to charge." You're signaling that you've already decided what to do regardless of the circumstances.

IANAL*, but it wasn't my impression that judges really and truly loathed the concept of nullification in and of itself. Given that a hung jury results in a mistrial rather than acquittal, which is not an automatic free pass for the defendant, getting twelve people to say that someone who is clearly guilty is officially not guilty is a pretty high bar. That has to be a daaaaaaaamn sympathetic defendant, and those kinds don't usually go to trial in the first place.

Of course, people are stupid, and if you tell them that there is technically a third option to the simple choice of guilty or not guilty, they'll use it every freaking time. It's the same reason that if I coached an NFL team, we'd be running nothing but flea-flickers and center-eligible plays, with the occasional drop-kick or surprise punt. (What? It's awesome, and technically it's legal!)

So... um... I guess my thesis is that it's complicated. Thank you for your time.

* and how!

In my case, the judge made a very large point of stressing that if we did convict his hands would be tied and he would have absolutely NO leeway in the matter of sentencing. I got the distinct impression that he was sending us the message that "This is a bullshiat case that the prosecutor is pressing in order to keep the defendant from suing the police department."

The defendant wasn't particularly sympathetic. In my view he was a drunken asshole. In my view the cops were power addled assholes. It wasn't worth a felony conviction with an automatic 1 year minimum in jail.

Just tell them you have contempt for lawyers, since they train ethics out of them in law school...but you wouldn't hold that against a defendant.

/still haven't been called back for jury duty 15 years later.

I can't believe they are thinking of pressing charges against someone for being honest. I am open and honest about my racism and hatred for the human race in general.. they should thank him for letting them know his views and that he shouldn't be forced to sit in judgment of people..

Getting out of jury duty? I followed one Farker's advice and put underwear on my head, straws up my nose and answered "Wibble" to every question. Never served a day.

offmymeds: Getting out of jury duty? I followed one Farker's advice and put underwear on my head, straws up my nose and answered "Wibble" to every question. Never served a day.

The temporary detention order must have sucked though.

Hickory-smoked: I believe that a jury should be paid a flat percentage of whatever the lawyers are being paid. That would probably make people less reluctant to serve.

Ah, nice idea! Send it up the chain immediately. Option B could at least be "employers will count jury duty as a paid workday."

/Everybody demands to be tried by a jury of their peers but nobody wants to be a peer.

SirDigbyChickenCaesar: offmymeds: Getting out of jury duty? I followed one Farker's advice and put underwear on my head, straws up my nose and answered "Wibble" to every question. Never served a day.

The temporary detention order must have sucked though.

Let's not talk about that, okay?

sounds like he was trying to game the system to avoid jury duty.

Am I weird for thinking that it would actually be interesting to serve on a jury?

The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.

as a person who is serving jury duty tomorrow, i am really looking forward to getting paid $15 instead of my usual days pay. I can't blame anyone who does whatever they can to say fark you to the system.

Harry Freakstorm: rudemix
Was going to write a long CSB now it will be just a short SB.

Best outcome I ever had trying to be a good citizen and go to jury duty was to watch a judge rip some idiot a new corn chute when he asked to be let off because he hates everyone and they're all guilty till proven innocent. People in the court were literally laughing out loud at the clown while the judge tore him up. It was great.

But was he chosen to sit on the jury?

Me? I listened carefully to the charges the little scum bag was charged with. One of them was "non-consensual sex". When the judge asked if anyone had a problem serving, I said "My niece had been date raped." I was out the door so fast, they had to mail me my shadow.

He didn't make it to the jury. It was late in the day and the selection had been already been a pain paring the group down. Double murder in a fairly small community so everyone knew, or kind of knew, about the people involved. He didn't make the jury and I'm sure neither side wanted someone so ignorant, but the judge hung on to him and made him ride the whole process out.

fredbox:

After serving on a criminal jury and realizing the level of understanding my "peers" had of the concept of proof beyond a reasonable doubt, I now find the only viable options if facing criminal charges to be either a bench trial or suicide by cop.

I didn't have to serve on a jury for that. I just listened to what they say and read what they post to the Internet.

Myself, I'd like to carry a cyanide capsule just in case. "Uh-oh, that cruiser just drove by slowly, turned around and came back. I don't want to hear what that cop's looking to pin on me."

Icetech3:

I can't believe they are thinking of pressing charges against someone for being honest. I am open and honest about my racism and hatred for the human race in general.. they should thank him for letting them know his views and that he shouldn't be forced to sit in judgment of people..

This. But there's no need to be racist: once I realized the main "race" I have contempt for is the human race further hair-splitting became too much like work.

Even brain-eating amoebae can't be blamed for their actions. Humans have a choice, and consistently choose wrong.

cletusnbrandine:

as a person who is serving jury duty tomorrow, i am really looking forward to getting paid $15 instead of my usual days pay.

$15? I wonder if that would be counted as "income" against my SSI and SNAP (formerly known a Food Stamps). I'd rather have a pint of Old Grand-Dad than the swill I've been drinking.

Assuming that the asshat in TFA is actually telling the truth about his bias or that someone in a similar situation had similar admitted prejudices, isn't this actually the best course of action?

If I know of my own bias, it's my responsibility as a potential juror to reveal that bias so that I do not serve on a case where that bias could have an effect on the outcome.

If the asshat had followed up his statement with a willingness to sit on any trial where the participants were all white males of his general socioeconomic class, maybe it would have worked out better for him.

CSB TIME: In fact, I WAS relieved from jury duty when asked to serve on a package-interdiction drug case. Why? Because my apartment had been raided due to a police address mix-up a few years prior, and I admitted that I was STILL pissed off about it. The judge should NOT have asked for a detailed description because it was so similar to the case on trial that he had to throw back the entire juror panel after I gave him the blow-by-blow of how the cops had screwed it up, nearly shot my wife, and generally made total jerks of themselves- and never once apologized or offered to help with the clean up or cost of repairs. Still pissed? You betcha! Oh, and the drug dealers that made our apartment complex a living hell? Yeah, they heard the commotion and booked, WITH their stash. Cops 0, Citizens -1, Dealers +1.

The One True TheDavid: cletusnbrandine:

as a person who is serving jury duty tomorrow, i am really looking forward to getting paid $15 instead of my usual days pay.

$15? I wonder if that would be counted as "income" against my SSI and SNAP (formerly known a Food Stamps). I'd rather have a pint of Old Grand-Dad than the swill I've been drinking.

Jury duty. Jury duty pay you receive must be included in your income on Form 1040, line 21. If you must give the pay to your employer because your employer continues to pay your salary while you serve on the jury, you can deduct the amount turned over to your employer as an adjustment to your income. Enter the amount you repay your employer on Form 1040, line 36. Enter "Jury Pay" and the amount on the dotted line next to line 36.

-IRS Publication 17 (2011), Your Federal Income Tax

You don't just offer that info unsolicited, it's obvious what you're trying to do. Saying you don't trust police on the little questionaire is the super easy way out. The prosecutor will immediately send you on your way.

Hickory-smoked: I believe that a jury should be paid a flat percentage of whatever the lawyers are being paid. That would probably make people less reluctant to serve.

Are you stupid? These lawyers would just charge more, and thus create MORE incentive to say that. The current judiciary is too stupid to know any better.

offmymeds: The One True TheDavid: cletusnbrandine:

as a person who is serving jury duty tomorrow, i am really looking forward to getting paid $15 instead of my usual days pay.

$15? I wonder if that would be counted as "income" against my SSI and SNAP (formerly known a Food Stamps). I'd rather have a pint of Old Grand-Dad than the swill I've been drinking.

Jury duty. Jury duty pay you receive must be included in your income on Form 1040, line 21. If you must give the pay to your employer because your employer continues to pay your salary while you serve on the jury, you can deduct the amount turned over to your employer as an adjustment to your income. Enter the amount you repay your employer on Form 1040, line 36. Enter "Jury Pay" and the amount on the dotted line next to line 36.

-IRS Publication 17 (2011), Your Federal Income Tax

Again, I'm on SSI. I don't pay income tax. I'm not even required to file.

Generally, the only taxes I pay are sales taxes, 6% in KY. They even add it to booze now.

Once again, I'd like to than those American taxpayers who support my loony self. Just think: it could be worse, I could be showing up in your workplace until they fired me or you murdered me. Back when I tried to work for a living, on the three occasions when somebody did screw up and did hire me I couldn't even keep a job I really liked for longer than four days.

If only the CIA hadn't detained me till the launch window for home was long gone...

BarkingUnicorn: AugieDoggyDaddy: I would be a great juror. I can tell if a person is guilty just by looking at them.

So could the Kirin, the Japanese unicorn. It was often called to court to identify and skewer the guilty. Also to detect whether a woman was truly a virgin.

With his magic horn?

*check*
"Well...not anymore"

Dwedit: Everyone knows that if you want to get out of jury duty, just use the 'N' word.

Nullification.

This.

Better still, show up wearing a FIJA t-shirt, and odds are good you'll get put in the "Do not summon - ever!" file...

WordyGrrl:
Ah, nice idea! Send it up the chain immediately. Option B could at least be "employers will count jury duty as a paid workday"

/Everybody demands to be tried by a jury of their peers but nobody wants to be a peer.."

Criminal trials? I qualify as a peer. Too smart to have been caught. Now, too old to do those sorts of things.

EVERYBODY PANIC: WordyGrrl:
Ah, nice idea! Send it up the chain immediately. Option B could at least be "employers will count jury duty as a paid workday"

/Everybody demands to be tried by a jury of their peers but nobody wants to be a peer.."

Criminal trials? I qualify as a peer. Too smart to have been caught. Now, too old to do those sorts of things.

Quite funny that a criminal conviction will stop you from serving on a jury. :D You are a true peer, yet no, no representation.